Grind 3.6 Amy and Dean

Amy

There is a little known fact about the PRT vans, something which as a healer I am well acquainted with. The benches along either side can be unfolded into gurney beds. It allows every PRT van to double as an ambulance capable of carrying two patients. Of course it's not as good as having a real ambulance, because there is no equipment and trained personnel wouldn't have room to work. However it does allow the PRT to evacuate people mid cape fight, something regular ambulances cannot do.

The reason that I was so fond of this fact is simple, I was tired, and while not incredibly comfortable it was a better way to catch a nap than sitting upright. Player seemed to agree. Given that she passed out before I had finished unfolding the bed I now occupy. I wanted to just let go and sleep, but my mind refused to calm down.

I still loved Vicky, but not like I had, not anymore. Now she is just my sister, and I loved her for it and nothing more. I had wanted this for so long. I did not need to feel guilty anymore. So why did I still feel so wrong? I knew it wasn't Vicky's fault, she could not have known what her aura was doing to me. But at the back of my mind the irrational part of myself was a mess of conflicting thoughts and feelings.

I could remember loving her. I could remember every guilty daydream, and twisted fantasy. They were still there fresh in my mind, but it was like remembering a friend I had not seen in years. Or perhaps a better way to describe it would be like reading a book you can relate to, where you can empathize with the characters but they are just far enough removed from you to make the story unsettling.

Ha, thinking about this whole mess in terms of books while lying next to someone who actually lives in books. I had heard about all kinds of ridiculous powers but Player's power is an entirely new brand of crazy.

She fixed me, did something I could never do. She went into my head and purged out all the emotions that didn't belong. But now what? We still need to explain to Vicky what her aura did to me. It's not my fault, never was in the first place, but what will Carol think? Hell, what will Vicky think? Can I even go back home after this?

The thoughts coil's in my gut like a snake made of lead. My mind kicks into overdrive trying to follow that train of thought to some sort of conclusion.

Carol couldn't throw me out for this, could she? It's not like it was even my fault. Even if she did I'm sure I could stay with Aunt Sarah. She wouldn't hold this against me, but how long could I stay there? Certainly not forever, and even if I could I would not want to. At some point I want to have my own life, and move out, and… and how could I?

I'm Panacea, the healer, the girl who does not fight. I could knock out baseline humans or ones with normal biology with just a touch, but that did not make me invincible. Many capes wear full body costumes, and some changers like Hookwolf I would likely be unable to affect at all. I never gave it much thought before because it has always just been a fact of life, but I would never be safe unless I was living with enough capes to make snatching me too dangerous for villains to risk.

Sure most villains respected the unwritten rules, but an unguarded healer, with no affiliated team? It would only be a matter of time. What was I even supposed to do if New Wave threw me out? Hell what was I supposed to do if I ever wanted to leave the city? I'd applied to the local university because it was nearby, and… wow that was really the only reason I had applied wasn't it? I was expected to go to college so I applied to the local university. I had not even picked a major I might be interested in. What was I even going to do when I got out? Being in New Wave didn't pay, and I healed for free. I guess I was expected to get a job at some point, but what kind of marketable skills did I really have? And was I just expected to live with Mark and Carol forever? I did not want that, and part of me felt sure Carol did not either.

I liked to write, maybe with enough practice I could be an author. I could certainly publish an autobiography. Detailing how much being a healer grinds a person down would make for an enlightening read, and plenty of people would buy it just because my name was on it. Was that what I should do? Spend my days healing and my nights writing? It didn't sound like much of a life. Sounded like what I do now, but more lonely.

Do I really want that? Am I OK with that being my whole life? The answer came rather easily, no. I wanted more out of my life than a pointless nine to five followed by a few hours of healing, or a day of writing then healing. I had spent so long blindly chasing Vicky, always knowing it was pointless. Now I could pursue a real relationship.

I glanced over where the sleeping Player was curled up with her pet dragons. She had been so earnest on the roof after Vicky's power stopped messing with her. Once I had her settled she almost immediately put the pieces together to figured out what Vicky had done to me, and fixed it. Now here she was passed out curled around her pets looking positively adorable and… OK time to reign myself in. She's not gay, she said so herself. Not to mention I was probably rebounding. Yes, that had to be it. I was rebounding, and this had absolutely nothing to do with her legs… It might, I hesitantly allowed myself to admit, have something to do with the fact that she was one of the only people in my life I felt a real connection to right now though.

That was a depressing thought. I had so few attachments in my life that my immediate response to getting over Vicky was to latch onto someone I had only known for a few hours. Great, just great.

I forced myself to stop and focus. I had the distinct feeling I'd jumped past an important train of thought. My future prospects and New Wave, right. I did not need to come up with an immediate solution to that, but really as long as I was reevaluating my life why ignore it? I did not fit. I had no combat powers, and I did not want to spend my life working, healing, and then sleeping. Hell why did anyone in my family want that sort of life? Unlike most capes we had to work to support ourselves. We all effectively had two jobs, work and cape life. I could see Crystal and Eric picking up a normal job but the idea of Vicky or I joining the normal workforce just sounded absurd. I admit I might like the distraction from healing, but that would be it. I would be working to get out of healing, and in the end I would not have any time left for myself. I needed a better solution than that.

The Van hit a pot whole bouncing us around a bit and waking Player with a start. Groaning she looked over at me. "Are we there yet?"

I had to suppress and amused snort at that infamous phrase. "No, you've only been out for about five minutes, probably still ten minutes until we get to the PRT."

Groaning again Player sat up to lean her back against the wall. "So what now, are you going to be OK explaining everything? You could always tell Glory Girl and leave it at that, but my boss and your Mom may not be happy with getting left out of the loop."

Slowly I shook my head no. "I swore you to secrecy because I didn't quite believe it. Everything fit but I just couldn't accept that it was Vicky's fault. That, and I was afraid it wasn't her power, that it was just me being, wrong."

Player took a moment to digest that. "So you plan to tell them everything?"

"Yeah, sorry in advance. Carol and Piggot are probably going to run you ragged scanning the brain of anyone she…" I let my voice trail off and swore. "Dean, for Vicky's sake he had better be right about her power not affecting him or she won't even have a shoulder to cry on when all is said and done."

Player seemed to blanch at that. "And I have to explain to him why I kissed his girlfriend. Great, just great."

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Dean

My life is not normal. I'm rich, I'm a cape, and I'm dating Alexandria junior. None of these things can be defined as normal. Because of all that I like to think I can take most things in stride given that I've built up a bit of immunity to odd things happening. Today is one of the days that test that belief.

Speaking into my phone I asked, "Vicky could you please repeat that for me."

"I said your teammate Player kissed me!" I winced pulling the phone away from my ear. Even without my power I could tell she was upset but that was not nearly as helpful. There were any number of feelings or combinations of feeling that could cause someone to be upset. I had never been very good at figuring out the exact culprit until I got my powers. Almost a year of experience with Vicky told me that this would be a bad time to play amateur shrink and start asking questions about why exactly that upset her. I was going to have to soldier on and just try not to piss her off more.

I was a bit angry that Player had kissed Vicky, but mostly I was confused. Up until now I had been under the impression she was straight based on her emotions around the base. But then she might be bi, after all Vista was really young, so maybe there hadn't been any girls around who's physical attributes she could admire?

Frankly, I know I should be more annoyed with Taylor, but the mental image of a girl kissing Vicky was playing havoc with my ability to think clearly. Not that I could ever admit that if I wanted to keep my head attached of course.

No this conversation called for making the shortest responses possible until I had time to work out what exactly was going on in Vicky's head, and how to address it without upsetting her.

"Do you know why she-"

My carefully selected question was interrupted by another ear shattering outburst. "I don't know! Amy said she was acting normal until I showed up, and she was yelling something about what an evil power my aura was! She actually called it a fuck me field!"

Ahh now that I could identify that sounded like indignation. So Taylor was overpowered by Vicky's aura, which is strange it's not that powerful, then she shakes it off, somehow, and claims it is Vicky's fault. Then it clicked, the little Dragons that now permanently resided in the Wards common room, share an empathic link with Taylor, and from there… fuck!

"Vicky, do you remember the big reason you like dating me?" I asked trying to keep my voice calm.

"Dean, now is not the time to talk about your-"

I cut her off. "No, Vicky, I meant about how our powers interact!" God, did she really think I would be making an innuendo right now? I've got more class then to change the topic to something like that, especially when she's upset!

"What, that you're immune? Dean, my aura does not make people abandon all reason." Her tone made it perfectly clear she thought I was being a moron.

"Vicky, did you notice three little dragon creatures flying around Player by any chance?"

The line went quiet for a moment before Vicky answered. "Yeah they looked cute, they disappeared not long after she kissed me, I think."

"Did she stop acting weird after they disappeared?"

"Umm yeah, I guess. That is if yelling at me isn't considered weird?"

"Crap. Vicky, the dragons are empathicly linked to her. What they feel she feels and vice versa. Your aura hit all of them, and she got nailed with the cumulative effect."

"Fuuuuck. Dean, I'd better go. I think I need to warn Mom that we might be getting a call from the PRT in the near future."

"Go ahead Vicky, oh wait one quick question?"

"Sure, what?"

"Was she a good kisser?" I had to, as nice as I am the question demanded to be asked, now that Vicky had been defused anyway.

"She was, as a matter of fact you could stand to learn a thing or two from her." And just like that Vicky hung up, leaving me with my mouth hanging open.