Double Trouble 34

Chapter 34 'Worse'

Emma and Regina ended up spending a lot of time at the apartment over the weekend in order to be with the rest of the family. With the notable exception of going to Mifflin St to sleep at nights of course, something that made Em and Ri smirk and giggle in their direction whenever they could get away with it. Mary Margaret and David watched their daughter's unfolding happiness before their very eyes and were pleased to see her walls coming down.

But there was one family member who didn't seem to be as enthusiastic about Emma and Regina's developing relationship.

All weekend Henry had been intercepting his mothers whenever they were close to each other, appearing out of nowhere to hug one of them or wriggle between them. Regina would also catch her son watching her carefully from time to time, like he was monitoring her behaviour, and the scrutiny made her feel like she was on a slide under his microscope.

When Regina mentioned it to Emma she passed it off as nothing, suggesting that Henry was just feeling a bit left out and maybe he was afraid that their being together would mean that they'd each pay less attention to him now. Recently he'd seemed ok with them getting along better and not fighting anymore. Plus he'd seen Em and Ri's romance blossom over the last few weeks. Why would he be opposed to his mothers being together now?

They sat him down to explain everything to him properly, beginning with the fact that they were seeing each other romantically.

"So you're in love," said Henry.

Emma beamed happily. "Yeah. We are."

Henry looked skeptical. "Do you really love Mom, Emma?"

"Yes and I'm pretty sure she loves me too. Why wouldn't she? I'm awesome."

Regina smiled fondly at Henry, brushing his hair back off his forehead. "But no matter what happens between us, whether we're together or not, the both of us will always love you, darling."

"Are you gonna get married?"

Emma gaped for a second before answering. "Well uh, let's not get ahead of ourselves. That's kinda down the track and a piece of paper is not that important anyway. But the three of us are a family ok?"

Henry listened quietly taking it all in but he didn't say much else. By Sunday night he was hanging all over Regina like a limpet, so she and Emma ended up staying the night in the crowded apartment, not wanting to leave him when there was obviously something wrong.

The next morning he was getting ready for school so slowly that he was in danger of missing the bus and making both his mothers late for work. Emma and Regina were getting concerned by his behaviour now, especially since he looked more suspicious than ever when they came out of the same bedroom.

After breakfast, Regina sat him down on the couch with her. "Henry, I know this must be confusing for you. Is there anything you want to ask us?"

The boy looked down glumly. "I can't tell if it worked," he mumbled.

Emma jostled his shoulder. "Hey kid, what's up? You've wanted us to get along better for ages but I can't help thinking that you're not happy about this. Don't you want us to be together?"

"I don't know."

"Can you tell us why," asked Regina gently.

Henry shook his head. "Not really."

"Kid, you can't just drop a bomb like that without telling us why!" said Emma.

"Emma. Don't speak to him in that tone." Regina shot her a warning look after noticing Henry's flinch at the outburst.

Emma got up to pace so she wouldn't have to see Regina glaring at her. The frustration of dealing with a recalcitrant child all morning was getting the best of her. There was one thing that every child instinctively knew, which was how to get on their parent's very last nerve. Emma hadn't experienced it before - the way that kids could try your patience and push your limits until you snapped. Last year, Henry had told her his every waking thought about Operation Cobra and his curse-breaking plans and she'd happily gone along with it, relishing especially in the fact that they were going behind Regina's back. But now, she realised, it wasn't that much fun to be shut out.

"I gotta get ready for work," Emma muttered, heading for the bathroom.

Henry watched Emma leave and then said something quietly to Regina. "Sorry, Mom."

"I'll drive you to school, Henry," said Regina. "You'll have missed the bus by now. Go get your things."

Regina was hiding it from her son and Emma both, but inside her heart was tearing painfully at the impossible thought of having to choose between the two most important people in her life. She hoped desperately that it would never come to that.

At the school entrance the bell was about to ring so Regina handed her son his backpack and lunchbox. "Try to have a good day, Henry."

"Mom, are you coming to pick me up this afternoon?" said Henry.

"I was going to. But I can call Emma to come get you if you'd prefer, or you can get the bus," she offered.

"No. You," said Henry quickly. "I want to go straight home after school. Can we please go straight there?"

"Of course. You can see everyone else when they get home."

"Not the apartment. I want to go to your house."

Regina was taken aback by his request and his wording. "Henry, it's your house too. It always will be."

"I have to go to class." Henry scuffed his feet and walked away.

Regina watched her son go until he disappeared into the school building, perplexed by his sudden clinginess to her and his apparent resistance to the idea of his mothers dating. What was going on with him? It worried her, she hadn't seen him act so downcast since last year when he found out he was adopted. After the curse broke he couldn't get away from her fast enough but now he seemed afraid to let her out of his sight. Maybe she should give Archie a call and see if he'd said anything to him.

She spied a familiar schoolteacher supervising the line of children alighting from the schoolbus near the gates.

"Don't dawdle, please. The bell's about to ring. Get to class." The pixie-haired teacher shepherded the last of the stragglers through the gate.

"Regina. Hi," said Mary Margaret, seeing her approach. "Henry missed the bus again?"

"Yes. Miss Blanchard, I'd appreciate it if you'd keep an eye on him today. Especially at recess."

"Oh, is there something wrong?"

"Have you seen any of the children troubling him?"

Mary Margaret was surprised by the question. "No, I haven't noticed anything like that. He doesn't have many friends but usually the other kids don't pay much attention to him. Did he tell you he's being bullied?"

"No. I don't think that's why he's upset."

"Did something happen? You don't look ok either."

Regina paused awkwardly. "He... knows about Emma and I."

"By the looks of it he didn't take it well?" Mary Margaret gave her a sympathetic grimace.

"We're not sure why," said Regina quietly.

"Ok. I'll keep an eye on him for you."

When Mary Margaret took her hand to support her, Regina's eyes snapped at her in warning. Out of habit she tried to pull her hand free but the kindhearted teacher held fast and gave her a significant look.

"Regina? This situation hasn't been easy for any of us and he's very young. He loves you both. I'm sure it'll just take a little time to get used to the idea."

"For once, I hope you are right."

If Regina squeezed her former enemy's hand in return she would deny it until her dying breath.

Mayor Mills had been at Town Hall for half the morning, without being able to concentrate or make headway with work tasks. When the phone on her desk rang, she picked it up on the first ring, knowing exactly who it'd be.

"Hi," said Emma over the phone. "Did he say anything more when you drove him to school?"

"No," Regina sighed. "Emma, don't be angry at him please. You said the three of us are a family. We have to make decisions together. He has a right to have a say in what happens to us. Our son is our first priority."

"Are you suggesting that we let a ten-year-old decide whether we can date each other?"

"He's eleven."

"Yes, I know that. You know what I meant. He's the kid, we're the parents."

"Yes, we are. But ignoring or belittling his feelings isn't going to get us anywhere. I did enough of that last year. I want to earn his trust again."

"So that's what you're doing. Trying to be the favourite Mom and letting him have his own way so that you can get back into his good books? Is this you stinging me, Regina, are we gonna drown?"

"If you continue that ridiculous train of thought I'm hanging up," Regina snapped.

"No, don't! Sorry, that was a crap thing to say. I know we're not competing anymore, I do. It's just - sometimes I get so worried about him that I can't think of anything else."

"Welcome to parenthood. It never ends by the way - the worrying."

"Lucky I've got you to tell me this stuff then huh."

Regina rose from her desk to go stand at her office window silently. She parted the curtains so that her apple tree was in full view.

"Do you think it's the same-sex thing?" suggested Emma, after a while. "He's young, maybe he just doesn't get it. Or maybe word's got around already and he's getting shit from the other kids at school. These Storybrooke kids are from Fairytale Land where there were no relationships like ours right? Kids can be cruel. What about you, you're from there too. Are you ok with it, Regina?"

"I admit it isn't easy, you were right. But neither do I give up the things I want easily."

"Argh, I wish he'd just told us! Then at least we'd know the reason, especially if it's something we can fix or explain to him."

"I suspect I know what it is," Regina admitted. "It's me. He doesn't want you to be with me."

Evidently Emma knew what she was inferring but wasn't happy about it. "Oh, come on. You don't seriously think he wants me to get back with Neal? Because that's not going to happen. Even if you and me weren't a thing."

"He may be attached to the idea that there's still a chance of his mother and father getting back together again."

"You're his mother," Emma snapped. "And I do not love Neal anymore. I dated him when I was a teenager and look what happened, he got me pregnant and left me to go to jail for him. I was alone and devastated and I waited months for him to turn himself in or even just to visit so that I could tell him about the baby. But he didn't. He abandoned me just like everyone else. He's had ten years to come find me and own up to that shit but he never did."

Regina gritted her teeth at hearing what Emma had gone through at Em's age. "He's a coward, like his father."

"It's okay. I'm a big girl, I'm over it. He's got a fiance now, I doubt he still loves me. I love you."

"I know you do... but Henry doesn't know that. Maybe we kept our secret too well, he never saw us falling in love. All he saw is us fighting one minute and telling him we're in love the next. I'm the Evil Queen. You're the Saviour, you're his hero. He worships you and I'm sure he's just trying to protect you. He wants to be your little hero too."

"I can take care of myself. It doesn't matter who you were before. To me you're Regina, the irritatingly stubborn, unbelievably beautiful woman who adopted my son and even though you get on my nerves and frustrate me every damn day I wouldn't change a thing. The Evil Queen is not all of who you are ok? Henry should know that better than anyone. I'll talk to him, since apparently he can't see for himself how much you've changed."

"I don't need you to defend me. You can't force him to trust me, Emma - or love me. Only I can earn that back."

"I know. I'm worried about both of you. We have a real chance to be happy here. I guess we just wait until he's comfortable telling us his reasons then we decide how to deal with it. So... we're okay aren't we? You and me?"

"Yes." Regina smiled even though it wouldn't be seen. "We're more than ok."

Emma sounded relieved. "I missed out on giving you a kiss goodbye this morning."

"Then you owe me, with interest accruing by the minute. I warn you, my rates are steep."

"I can afford it. I might have to work late tonight. But you can come collect your debt whenever you like..."

"It'll have to be later tonight then. Henry asked me to pick him up from school and I'm booked for the rest of today with meetings. Speaking of which, my 10am should be here soon."

"Alright. I suppose I can let you go." Emma gave a heavily exaggerated sigh. "If I must."

When Regina hung up the phone, it immediately buzzed with the usual indication that her guest had arrived. She pressed the Talk button and wondered why her assistant hadn't announced it properly.

Regina tapped her fingers on the desk impatiently. "Martha. Send Judge Bensen in… Martha?"

No answer.

She went over to open the door herself, ready to apologise to the Judge for the breach of protocol. Her assistant was sitting at the reception desk trying not to be obvious about smiling despite her insubordination.

Apparently her guest hadn't arrived yet, instead there was none other than Sheriff Emma Swan waiting in the receiving area with that cocksure hipshot stance she so favoured. Her smug face read 'I got so lucky last night' and it wasn't the only thing different about her this morning...

Regina raised her eyebrows in that 'I know what you're up to' way, as though to chastise her for trying it anyway.

"Sheriff Swan. I have a meeting now."

"Yeah, about that," Emma sauntered closer, giving her a less-than-subtle once-over. "Bensen is otherwise occupied. Break-in at home early this morning. Big mess to sort out. He said to tell you he won't be making his 10am."

"Even so, I am very busy."

"This won't take long."

Regina hid a thrilled smirk and as soon as she'd closed her office door behind them, she threw her arms around Emma's neck and kissed her soundly. One of Emma's hands caressed at her waist, threatening to untuck her blouse from her skirt, and the other was still hiding something behind her back.

Emma grinned and pecked her again. "Mm did you miss me? Of course you did. I missed me and I was with me."

Regina laughed softly because it sounded like something Em would say. "It's only been a couple of hours, Emma."

"I know. That's forever," came the mock-whine. "We had fun last night didn't we?"

"Technically it was early this morning I believe."

"More than just fun. Love makes it pretty good don't you think? I reckon we've hit double digits, but who's counting?"

Regina pursed her lips, trying to hide a delighted smile. She picked up a handful of blonde curls at the base of Emma's neck and let the locks fall any which way. Emma's hair was much longer now than it had been last year when she'd arrived in Storybrooke. Regina had been annoyed at herself at the time for admiring the contradiction of Emma's pretty doll-like features with her prince-ish attire. Skinny jeans, boots, leather jacket. Fair skin, startling green eyes, shining gold ringlets.

The curls were back.

"What's with these hm?" murmured Regina, twirling one curl around her index finger.

Emma shrugged innocently. "No reason."

"And what are you hiding behind your back? Besides your precious hair."

"Wouldn't you like to know."

Regina made a grab for whatever was behind Emma's back but she wasn't quick enough.

"Uh uh uh." Emma chuckled, but apparently she couldn't contain the secret any longer and presented her with a perfect long-stem rose.

"How romantic," Regina deadpanned, taking it and eyeing the full head of the blood-red bloom. She brushed one of the outer petals with her thumb.

"If you don't want it, give it back."

Regina's eyes flashed playfully. "No! It's mine."

"Ha. You're just like Ri sometimes. You always did fall for the corniest stuff. I'll make you a mix-tape later."

Emma scrunched her face, catching sight of the time. "I have to go. I gotta stop by Miss Ginger's to check on her on my way to KidSpace."

"Good. I'm far too busy for this," said Regina loftily. She accepted a peck on her cheek before turning away to return to her desk. "Sheriff, if she offers you any gingerbread don't eat it. It's always stale."

At the door, Emma poked her head back around. "Oh Regina? You might wanna check your lipstick in the mirror."

The rest of her day was busy but Henry was still on her mind. As soon as Regina got a chance she grabbed her phone and pressed one of her familiar speed dials.

"Dr Hopper, it's Mayor Mills."

Archie answered in his characteristic friendly voice. "Hi Regina, how are you."

"I realise this is late notice but are you available this afternoon to see Henry?"

"I have some time yes. Is this going to be as his therapist or as his friend? To be honest, I need to know."

"I'm not sure," admitted Regina. "He's acting strange."

"Strange how? Behavioural issues? Problems at school?"

"No, he's been very quiet and clingy but he won't say what's wrong. He found out about Emma and I and he said he doesn't want us to be together. I think it's because of me. He's still afraid I'm going to hurt Emma."

"Ah. Is he acting out against you again? Like when he found out you hadn't told him he was adopted?"

"No, that's the strange part. He's become more clingy towards me. If he wanted us to be apart I would've expected him to side with Emma quite frankly."

"Well, his relationship with Emma is different to his relationship with you. Both of you are his mothers but Emma came into his life at an older age, you were the one who cared for him during his earliest years. Every time he was sick or sad or scraped a knee he turned to you."

Regina closed her eyes shamefully. "Except last year when I was the one hurting him and Emma came to his rescue."

"Yes. If he is regressing in this way now it's probably because there's something hurting him and he is naturally gravitating towards his primary caregiver. Perhaps he is seeking some type of comfort that only you can provide."

"What would that be?"

"I don't know. But you have a unique story, Regina. You've been through great pain and done terrible things, you've been alone and hated... Yet you are coming through it successfully. Perhaps Henry sees you in himself and he wants to know that he can be ok too."

"But my son isn't like me! He's good."

"He's told me previously in our sessions that he doesn't think he's as good as he should be. That makes him exactly like you, Regina."

The diner, later that evening

Granny barely raised her eyes from the accounts she was inspecting behind the counter when the bell rang signalling a new customer to the diner. She penned a figure in the totals column on the page, wondering to herself when or if she'd ever be able to convince Ruby to learn this particular aspect of running the place. Perhaps she could outsource to one of the fourth graders. Young Henry Mills was a smart child...

A large basket of apples was placed on the counter in front of her with a dull thud.

"You're late," said Granny.

"Yes," said the Mayor. "I'm aware that I am behind this month on delivering a supply of apples to you for free. Please accept my sincerest apologies."

"Easy for you to say," said Granny, looking at her over her glasses. "You're not the one getting death threats because there's no apple pie today. The citizens of Storybrooke are serious about their pie."

When Granny returned from taking the basket to the kitchen she noticed that the Mayor had taken a seat in one of the booths, far removed from the other patrons. Infant or adult, to someone who had known her well, Regina Mills had the same look about her. The one that begged for company and said 'I don't want to be alone.'

The elderly woman went to the coffee machine and prepared the steamed milk at the perfect temperature for a latte. The distinctive familiar smell of vanilla filled the air. Granny wondered if Regina even knew how long she'd had a penchant for that particular flavour. Her first solid food had been apple puree with a vanilla pod boiled through it. As her nurse, Mrs Lucas had been at her wit's end trying to wean the fussy then-Princess Regina after Cora had dismissed the wetnurse prematurely. The tiny girl had refused everything else, but as soon as the first silver spoonful of apple was placed on her tongue she was like a different child. There was one second of 'oh dear, what is this you're giving me!' and then a smile broke over the pretty baby's tear-stained cheeks.

Granny supposed she ought to feel guilty for dosing the grownup Regina with vanilla like this, but as anyone who has ever tried to soothe a baby from excessive crying knows … if it works, go with it.

She went over to place the mug on the table in front of the Mayor, who startled at the clunk sound as though jerked out of a deep thought.

"I'm not staying," said Regina hastily, eyeing the unordered drink. "I'm only waiting here for Henry."

"I've placed your usual dinner orders with the kitchen," said Granny, ignoring the comment. "Will the Sheriff be joining you?"

Regina regarded her with an impassive countenance, obviously pretending not to hear the implication behind the question. "I doubt it. Why would she?"

Granny smiled knowingly and stashed her notepad in her apron. "Hard to go back to isn't it?"

"What is."

"Eating dinner alone."

"I won't be staying for dinner." Regina seemed annoyed at having to repeat it. "Like I said, I'm waiting for Henry to finish talking with Dr Hopper."

"Looks like you could use somebody to talk to as well."

"I'm fine, Mrs Lucas."

Granny caught the accompanying eye roll, but she was used to the insolence of young people after raising her feisty granddaughter.

"Really?" said Granny. "Is that why you're staring at your phone there like you're hoping it will ring? My Ruby spends half her night texting away on her phone. I threatened to take it away once and she damn near bit my head off. I may be old but I'm not so decrepit as to not remember what it's like to be young and in love."

"Who says I'm in love," came the defensive retort.

"Anybody with eyes and ears." Granny shrugged and lowered herself into the opposite seat of the booth. "I have particularly keen senses... all the better to hear you with. If you feel you want to talk about it that is."

Regina took a sip of her vanilla latte and placed the mug back on the table in front. She stared at it silently for a while before speaking up.

"I... I'm afraid it's going to happen again," Regina admitted quietly. "I keep waiting for something to come and tear us apart."

Granny listened without interrupting as Regina slowly opened up and revealed her fear of losing someone else she loved. She spoke of feeling like she'd been given the gift of happiness, but wasn't able to fully enjoy it or trust that it was real because she was expecting it to be pulled out from under her feet again.

After what she'd done in the past, she knew that she was facing opposition in various quarters and sometimes believed herself that she didn't deserve this second chance - but she wanted it so much. Emma's parents had been irritatingly supportive (in fact, Regina admitted that she'd almost been looking forward to fighting the battle she expected but it hadn't eventuated) and other friends who either knew or suspected the relationship seemed willing to accept it as well.

But it was so confusing that she'd fallen for not only the daughter of her worst enemy but the woman who had tried to take away her son. How was it possible that she loved the one person she should loathe above all others? It remained unbelievable to her that Emma could know everything about her - really know her - and could still understand and forgive her. Defend her. Save her. Not just once but reliably, every single time she needed it.

She had found true happiness and yet again it was a child threatening to take that away from her.

But this time it was their own child.

She was terrified now that Henry might have to face the wrath of the Evil Queen. It'd happened before after all...

"I should never have let this happen," declared Regina, hand slicing the air like a blade. "I should've killed her before I fell in love with her. I knew who she was as soon as she turned up in Storybrooke. Snow White's daughter was in town to take away my son. I've done much worse for far less provocation. But something stopped me."

"What was it?" said Granny.

"I came to bring you the usual basket of apples but I passed by Miss Swan's room instead."

Regina rolled her eyes. "She answered the door in nothing but her underwear and a smirk. I gave her one of my apples and babbled to her about how sweet they are. I still have no idea why. A few hours later she was attacking the tree you gave me with a chainsaw. I can't explain it but that saved her life. She certainly got my attention. In more ways than one..."

"Loud and obnoxious." Granny chortled. "That does sound like our Sheriff Emma Swan."

"Indeed". Regina smiled. "The first time she kissed me I felt like I'd been woken from a dream and brought back to life. Would you like to hear the story?"