Double Trouble 44
A/N: Hi readers, I haven't had time to do replies lately but I so appreciate your reviews as always. The 'Friday night' thing from the end of last chapter wasn't something forgotten about, it'll be revealed in this one. Enjoy!
I've also posted a new story set after the Winter Finale 3x11 if you're interested. It's called The Visit and the link is in my profile. Thank guys, I hope you're all enjoying the new year so far.
Chapter 44 'Friends'
"Emma, no," Regina said in the closest tone she ever got to a whine. She had her hands on her hips, watching Emma search through the wardrobe for something to wear that evening.
"It's Friday night, it's Kathryn's birthday, it's drinks with a few people who you already know. You have to get used to us going out in public together as a couple and this is an appropriate baby step in that direction. It'll be fine. You're coming, Regina."
"I don't think so. Do have a fun night out, dear."
"Oh no way. If I have to go, you do too. Accompanying me to social events I get roped into falls under the job description of 'girlfriend' and that's you. Mary Margaret caught me unawares a few weeks ago and somehow I agreed to go, so now you have to come too."
"We've been over this. I do not concede to do anything that will make her happy."
"What about Kathryn then?" Emma tried to catch Regina's eye off the floor. "Huh? Isn't she your friend? Pretty sure spending time with friends is what makes it a birthday celebration."
"I doubt that it will be happy for her if I'm there. We're not friends."
"You were last year."
Regina crossed her arms to fill the pause and then admitted one of the reasons for her reluctance. "She hasn't spoken to me since the curse broke."
"Ok. So, she might not be talking to you but have you tried calling her?"
"Of course not."
"Why?"
"Are your Charming genes expressing themselves right now or are you being dense on purpose?"
"The first one, I think. Tell me why you haven't talked to her."
"Because!" Regina let her arms flap out in exasperation. "I just haven't. And I'm not going to impose on her tonight, her birthday of all days, the first time I will have seen her since the curse broke. My curse in case you've forgotten, after which I was under house arrest and then I was accused of the one murder I wasn't actually responsible for. She knows who I really am now. She must know that I was behind her disappearance. I was the one who took away her happy ending and had her married to a man who could never love her-"
"The same thing that happened to you, you mean?"
"Yes! If you insist on making comparisons."
"Sounds like you've got some common ground then, that's a good start for a friendship. You recognise that your actions hurt her so all you gotta do is apologise. The curse screwed up a lot of relationships, but she's even patched things up with Mary Margaret and David now so how bad can it be? It might be awkward at first but it's going to be fine."
"It is not fine," insisted Regina. "Just because you say it with such conviction doesn't mean it's true."
"That's exactly what makes it true. But it never will be unless you do something about it. You've got an election coming up, think of it as practice. Win her vote. Just say to her: 'Sorry for temporarily ruining your life, how's it working out with that hunky gym teacher you're dating now?' Don't even bother giving me that evil glare, Regina, I'm immune now. I know how sweet you can be."
"I am not sweet. I've ruined the lives of untold millions."
"Yes, I know. Tales of your badassery have not been exaggerated. But Kathryn's really nice! She's not going to bite you. If you're good I might bite you. Later. There's some motivation for you."
Emma pecked Regina's cheek and walked out of the wardrobe to get dressed.
Regina started flicking through the hangers on her side, looking for something to wear. How was it that she had so many clothes and yet there was nothing that felt right for whatever was going to happen tonight? She didn't own any girly-glittery-shimmery party dresses because she never went out, she'd been working and raising a child for ten years in a town full of people who hated her. What exactly was one supposed to wear when invited somewhere as Emma's Girlfriend? She didn't want to wear anything too Evil Queen-ish, yet everything else was -
Emma called out to her from the bedroom. "You do realise that you are literally standing in a closet right now, Regina? Hurry up, time to come out. I'll look after you I promise."
Regina grumbled under her breath. "You are so annoying. I hate you."
"I heard that. Love you too!"
Outside the White Rabbit
After a small disagreement about who was going to drive and who was going to drink (Regina had tried to say that she was going to do neither since she was still resisting coming at all), the two of them had parked in Main street and were walking towards the bar.
Emma was wearing a dress, the only one she owned in fact. She had purchased it on a whim for her last birthday and only now remembered that that was the last time she'd worn it. This was the first time Regina had seen her in a dress of any kind, let alone a skin-tight red knockout that literally stopped traffic, and the stunned look she got for it made Emma far less annoyed that the only matching shoes she had were ridiculously uncomfortable to walk in. Just a little enticement/reward for Regina to get her out the door.
Not the stupidest thing I've ever done to get her attention, thought Emma wryly. We've been together for a while now and I'm still doing things like this on the off chance that she might notice and kiss me for it. Damn, why didn't I think to contrive a reason to wear this for her last year!
It was getting cold and she wrapped her black leather jacket tighter around herself. She snuck a peek at a tense-looking Regina and then slipped her hand into the pocket of her girlfriend's coat to take her hand.
"If you're really not ok with this you don't have to," said Emma.
Regina gave her an exasperated look. "You're only saying that because we're almost there."
"Look at that, we are too. We might as well go in."
"This is a terrible idea," said Regina, shaking her head. "I should be at home taking care of Henry."
"Relax, he'll be fine without us for a few hours. The girls have taken care of him before. Technically he is still with his parents you know."
"I asked Mrs Lucas to go over there at six to bring dinner and to check on them."
"See! It's all under control. It might actually be good for Henry to see us go out for once."
"How's that?"
"He doesn't have any friends. Kids emulate their parents don't they? Maybe if he sees that we're capable of acting like normal social creatures instead of like the screw-ups we really are then he'll get the idea that having friends is a good thing."
Regina stopped just outside the door to the bar to give Emma a searching look. She was also wearing a dress underneath her buttoned-up coat but it was far more demure than Emma's. Before they left the house their teenage selves had made a point of critiquing their attire. Ri approved their choices and Em predicted that both dresses would be laying on the bedroom floor by midnight. Henry took Emma aside to instruct her very earnestly to take care of his Mom because she was a target now and "everyone knows weird stuff happens when The White Rabbit appears..."
That kid definitely needed to get out more. So did his mother.
Regina was still staring at her. "What," said Emma self-consciously, wondering if she'd said something wrong. She was new to this parenting thing after all.
"You are so-" Regina sighed and closed her eyes for a second. "Sometimes I'm reminded why I fell in love with you."
"Declarations of how awesome I am are not getting you out of this."
"I take it back then."
"No, you don't. I know who you truly love."
Regina handed Emma the gift bag. "Here, you take the present."
Emma took the bag and then reached for the door. "Shall we go in, my gorgeous yet somewhat curmudgeonly Queen?"
"You would do well to remember the Queen part more often."
"After you."
"Still hanging onto your misplaced chivalry, Emma?"
"Nope. Just making sure you're not going to escape."
Inside the White Rabbit
"Ashley, how bad can she be?" said Ruby. "She's a little old lady."
"She is a nightmare I'm telling you!" said Ashley. "Every single day she comes over to see Alexie and she finds faults with absolutely everything I do. I don't use the right diaper brand and I don't puree the vegetables from scratch and I should've breastfed for longer and I don't dress my daughter in smart enough clothes … it just goes on and on. Sean doesn't see it because he's always at work and I'm stuck at home with her and the baby all day. She's driving me crazy!"
"Oh Ash," said Mary Margaret. "Maybe she's just lonely? Now that your stepsisters have moved out?"
"Maybe. You know Stacy and Diana don't even go over there anymore? Their mother had a hip replacement operation and I'm the one going over to that oversized house of hers to clean and bring groceries and help her go to the doctor. They were too wrapped up in their own fabulous lives to notice that she needed help. Not that she wanted my help of course. She's told me a million times how I remind her of my father."
"That's what makes you a good person," said Mary Margaret. "Not everyone would be so giving in your situation."
"You've got a lot on your plate for a nineteen year old," said Kathryn. "I should be the one who's angry, it's my birthday and you're making me feel very old right now. I'm more than ten years older than you."
Ruby threw an arm around Ashley's neck. "Must be time for the next round. What do you want?"
Ashley giggled. "I want Mary Margaret to tell me the secret of getting rid of an Evil Stepmother!"
"What makes you think she was successful," said Regina flatly.
The girls stopped laughing immediately and all turned to stare at Emma and Regina, who had just arrived at the table. Ashley, Kathryn, Ruby, and Mary Margaret were seated around the booth. It wasn't half obvious what questions must've been buzzing in their minds: What is she doing here? Are they together? Is that a real Prada, I so want that in red. Am I in danger for my life?
"Let me guess," said Mary Margaret with a twinkle in her eye. "You're here to kill me."
"Not today," said Regina.
"Er, hi guys," said Emma, trying not to laugh at how awkward it was. "Sorry we're late. Regina's fault."
Emma passed the gift bag over the table to Kathryn. "Happy Birthday, Kathryn."
"Thanks, you didn't have to do that." Kathryn pulled out of the bag an expensive bottle of wine and smiled at it, though puzzled. "This is my favourite. How did you know?"
"I didn't," said Emma, letting the implication hang, seeing as how Regina wasn't going to own up to it.
"Well, it's very thoughtful. Thankyou both. It's good to see you!"
Everyone shuffled around the booth to make room so that the two newcomers could sit down. Emma helped Regina off with her coat and then shucked her own jacket. Ruby quizzed Regina about something as soon as she sat down. Kathryn was still eyeing the couple with curiosity and shooting glances at Mary Margaret. Ashley, the youngest of the group, was brushing some stray sparkles off her shirt which said in glittering script 'A pair of shoes can change your life...'
"Oh my, Emma, is that a dress?" Mary Margaret said with her hands on her cheeks. "Quick! Where's my phone. I need photographic proof to show your father. This might never happen again and he won't believe me otherwise."
"Very funny, Mom," groused Emma.
"You do look hot, Emma," said Ruby. "Even if you have stolen my signature colour."
"I take full credit for producing you," said Mary Margaret. "I knew you were going to be the most beautiful baby ever as soon as you popped out."
Emma cringed. "Can't you wait until after I'm drunk to embarrass me with baby stories?"
Ashley's face lit up and she flapped her hand at Mary Margaret. "Oh oh oh. Do you remember? Emma and Alexie were due at the same time. How weird is this! They're like 28 years apart now."
"You're right!" said Mary Margaret. "Remember we talked about how they were going to grow up together and be best friends?"
"Yes! And if Alexie had've been a boy we were going to get them betrothed and have a little baby wedding?" Ashley and Mary Margaret collapsed into giggles.
Ruby shot Emma a sly look. "Who says Emma's suitor would have to be a boy? Maybe she and Alexie would've hit it off."
"I narrowly escaped an arranged marriage just in time then," joked Emma. "Lucky for the curse."
Ashley glared playfully. "No! The curse was awful. I was nine months pregnant that whole time. How would you like having a baby's head dropped down into your pelvis and sitting on your bladder for 28 years?"
"Yeah, that last part was no fun."
"Thankyou though, for what you did for us, Emma," said Ashley sincerely. "You really saved me that day. You were the first person who ever made me think I could actually do this and maybe I'm not a super Mom but I can't imagine my life without Alexie anymore. I love her so much. I can't believe I almost missed it all."
"I think I know what you mean."
Emma felt Regina take her hand under the table. She wanted to raise their hands and press a kiss to her knuckles but they hadn't talked about PDAs yet and whether it was ok for them to act like a couple in front of others. She didn't want to push Regina before she was ready, especially given the company and everything still being so new and the fact that she'd been reluctant to come at all. One of her favourite memories was when Regina had licked her in front of her parents… but there was a difference between riling up old enemies and being lovey dovey in public for all to see. They had each other, they had Henry, and that was enough for Emma.
"Oh, I'm sorry," said Ashley. "I didn't mean to bring that up. Your baby and all..."
"No, it's ok." Emma shared a look with Regina. "I have my son back in my life now."
"You do?" said Ashley in surprise.
Ruby rolled her eyes at the girl. "Duh, Ashley, have you been inhaling too much dust? It's Regina's kid. She adopted him."
Ashley gaped for a second and stared at them, trying to work it out. "I heard about that. Are you two…?"
"Yes," said Regina impatiently.
"Oh."
"Yeah." Ruby scanned the cocktail menu. "They're lesbianing together."
Mary Margaret nearly choked on her drink and coughed. "Ruby, honestly!"
"What? I'll verbify the word if I want to. It's true. Besides, they look hot together. Woo."
Ashley squinted at the puzzle in her mind. "So Emma had a baby who was adopted by her mother's Evil Stepmother and now, ten years later, they're together and raising a son? The Saviour and the Evil Queen?"
"Yep," said Ruby, popping the last syllable. She raised her hand and gestured to the waiter.
"Isn't that romantic?" said Ashley. "Good and evil, light and dark, opposites attract. Why didn't we have a story like this before?"
"Um, we do," said Ruby, like it was obvious. "Romeo and Juliet. 'My only love sprung from my only hate' and all that torturous forbidden love stuff. That was a cool movie."
The schoolteacher in Mary Margaret wasn't convinced. "Romeo and Juliet was a story of hormone-driven chaos, a headlong rush towards doom as the teenagers fought off time to make their love last forever. It was also a tragedy if you recall."
Ruby shrugged. "Baby Emma and Little Regina are here to fulfill the crazy hormonal teenager aspect of it. Hopefully they'll sidestep the tragedy part."
"Who are you talking about?" asked Kathryn.
"Nevermind," Emma jumped in. "It's a long story."
"Actually that's the short part," said Ruby to Ashley and Kathryn. "Their teenage selves appeared in Storybrooke one day and they really hit it off. Love at first sight."
"Where are the girls tonight?" asked Mary Margaret.
"At home," said Emma.
"They're taking care of Henry," added Regina.
Ruby snorted. "Babysitting? That's the oldest one in the book. Something tells me Henry's going to bed very early tonight."
Emma sighed, unable to take it any longer. "Guys, can we talk about something else."
"I wish I had a clone." said Ashley, like she was thinking it over as a serious possibility. "I'd make her do all the chores and stuff I don't want to do so that I could have more fun. But I wonder what wise things I'd tell my teenage self if I had the chance? Hmm."
Ruby cracked up and the others followed. "Ash, your teenage self was only five minutes ago! How much wiser can you possibly be in that time."
Kathryn smiled at the new couple, both of whom looked uncomfortable with the attention and like they could do with being rescued. "Well, it does sound like a lovely story. But can we please stop talking about being a teenager now? You're not supposed to be making me feel old on my birthday, even though I've decided not to count the cursed years in the total."
The waiter came over and offered them the next round of drinks, everybody repeated their order.
"What are you drinking there, Mary Margaret?" said Emma. "What is that? It looks interesting."
Mary Margaret giggled and raised her empty martini glass, the first one obviously already gone to her head. "It's a Poison Apple. See, I survived! Again."
Never one to be outdone, Regina dropped the cocktail menu onto the table and said to the waiter. "I'll have a Bloody Mary."
Nobody could tell if it was just her dark humour or if she was serious so it had the desired effect.
108 Mifflin St
Em woke at about 7pm feeling tired. She'd just laid down for a quick nap after dinner and ended up collapsing into an exhausted sleep instead. The bedroom was cool and dark and she was alone. Ri wasn't in bed next to her yet and the entire house sounded quiet.
She sat up in bed and frowned to herself, listening carefully. The house was silent but there was something off about it.
"I feel a disturbance in the force..." Em murmured to herself.
The teen padded into Henry's bedroom to check on him. At first glance he appeared to be in bed asleep even though it was far too early for his bedtime. But when she flicked on the lights she saw that the lump in bed was merely a pillow stuffed under the covers.
Did you really think that lame trick would work, kid? Who on earth would that fool? I invented truancy. I wrote the book on running away. Why didn't you come to me for this? What are you up to?
Downstairs, Em found them easily just as the pair were attempting to slip out the back door quietly. Ri and Henry, both dressed entirely in black, were shushing each other and tiptoeing around like thieves in the night.
"Henry, are you going to need a warmer jacket?" whispered Ri.
"Riii, you sound like Mom." Henry whispered back. "Let's go. Before she wakes up."
"Where do you two think you're going?" said Em. They whirled around at the sound of her disapproving voice.
The White Rabbit
The women were still chatting about anything and everything at a volume that kept increasing as the music and the bar around them got louder. They'd also had a fair few drinks between them by this point, which was bringing out the giggles frequently. Technically it was a girl's night out so their significant others weren't there (apart from Emma and Regina of course who were each other's Other) so it wasn't long before the conversation turned to men.
Kathryn was enjoying her first post-curse birthday. She was torn between wanting to chat longer with her friends and being impatient to leave so that she could see her boyfriend. She was a little concerned about how quiet Regina was tonight and was hoping to get her alone at some point so they could talk, but she kept getting roped into conversations that ranged from gossip to pure silliness.
"So where are your boys this evening, girls?" said Ruby.
"Sean's taking care of Alexie," said Ashley.
Mary Margaret nodded. "David went over there to watch the game with him."
Ruby raised her eyebrows pointedly at Kathryn. "And where's yours tonight? I hope he hasn't abandoned you on your birthday for a sports game."
Kathryn smiled and swirled her straw in her pink fruity drink. "No, we're having dinner later."
"How long is it that you've been together now?"
"Six months next week. I went looking for Frederik after the curse broke and found Tommy. It turns out my knight in shining armour is the gym teacher at Storybrooke Elementary. He told me he'd seen me around town a few times but was too shy to talk to me. The love of my life was under my nose the whole time yet we'd never even met."
"So, when's the wedding."
Mary Margaret admonished her. "Ruby! They might not be at that stage yet. Don't put undue pressure on them."
"What?" said Ruby. "It's a legit question. You fell in love with Charming after one song that he sang to your balcony. Cinders here married her prince after like, a single dance at a ball. You girls are lucky you didn't end up getting shackled to two-faced lying bastards. At least Kathryn has taken the time to scope her guy out a bit."
"That isn't how it happened actually," said Mary Margaret snootily. "For someone who mistook her own grandmother for a wolf in a nightgown you are being mighty skeptical, Red. Charming and I met in the woods by chance when I hit him in the face. Then we had to go find the trolls to get a refund on the jewels. We fell in love on the journey."
"Ah. We all know what" Ruby made air-quotes, "'camping in the woods' really means, don't we. Did you find any 'jewels' on your 'treasure hunt'?"
"You would know more about fornicating in the woods than I, wolf girl."
"Hey, at least I wasn't pregnant on my official wedding day like someone I know. Everyone at this table was there. Even if one of them was only jellybean-sized at the time."
Mary Margaret spluttered. "I - I was not pregnant then! Emma came early. She had to be to out-run the curse."
Ruby laughed. "Whatever you say, Snow. Check a calendar. You're off by an entire season you know."
Kathryn had to hide a smile at the expressions on Emma and Regina's faces. It was hard to tell which of them was more traumatised by hearing about Snow's pre-marital adventures. Or perhaps they'd logically deduced that they wouldn't have a relationship together now if Snow had waited until marriage and subsequently her baby's birth had missed the curse's deadline. The writers at Disney sure had left out a lot of details.
Ashley drumrolled her hands on the table. "Ok spill, Kathryn! Tell us what we want to know."
Kathryn nodded and couldn't hold back her news any longer. It still sent her heart aflutter when she thought of it and she thought she might be glowing. "Yes, we're getting married. I found the ring by accident. Tommy knows. He said that since I was the one who ruined the surprise, he's not going to tell me when or how he's going to ask and it could be anytime. Now I keep expecting to find a ring in every glass I drink from or have a flashmob jump out at me at any moment. I have no idea when it's actually going to happen and it's driving me nuts waiting!"
"Ten bucks says it's tonight," said Ruby, and all the others yessed and nodded in agreement.
"Oh by the way, Mary Margaret, if you and David are free sometime next week we need to meet with the lawyer."
"You're getting a divorce?" said Regina.
"Wow, you seem really cool with it," said Ashley. "Why aren't you bummed about it?"
Kathryn's gave them a serene smile, looking at each one around the table as she spoke. "I have mixed feelings about it. On the one hand I have Tommy, who I've loved forever, and it's been wonderful getting to know him again. He's actually not the same man as when he was Frederik. Things are slightly different, I imagine it's the same with all of you. On the other hand, I remember being married to David. I have memories of our honeymoon and even though I know that never actually happened, in my mind it's real. I want to honour that. I don't see what the difference is between real memories and fake memories. To me, they feel no different and before the curse broke I knew no difference either. The part of me that's Kathryn Nolan will always have love for David Nolan, but I am so grateful that we've both found the ones who we're really meant to be with now."
Ruby raised her glass for a toast. "Well said, birthday girl. To True Love!"
Mary Margaret clinked her glass. "I'll drink to that."
"And me," said Ashley.
Emma said to her, "So you're kinda like my stepmother? Because you were married to my father. I have the weirdest family tree."
Kathryn laughed. "Are you feeling left out, Emma? Any princess worth her salted caramel has an Evil Stepmother. I could try to ruin your life if you insist upon it but you'd probably come out on top anyway, so let's not and say we did?"
"Fine with me." Emma raised her glass and took a sip.
Ashley finished her glass off. "Mm! So now that David's free when are you getting married again, Mary Margaret?"
Emma was clearly surprised by the question herself and Kathryn could almost hear warning bells going off when she felt Regina's posture stiffen next to her.
Mary Margaret shook her head and waved her hands, trying to buzz away the attention and the keen stares of the other women. "No no no. We'll make it legal eventually but I've already had two weddings. That's plenty, believe me. Any future wedding I attend will be as a guest."
"Or as mother of the bride," Ruby muttered.
The glass in Regina's hand shattered, sending dripping shards and liquid spilling onto the table.