Double Trouble 45

A/N: Hi lovely patient readers! I've gotten some great feedback recently about the open questions in this story and it's much appreciated. There's some hints about the shrinking border in this chapter and a development coming very soon on that front. Em's still keeping the baby a secret but it won't be long before someone else finds out. Thanks for reading, enjoy :).

I've also continued The Visit with a second part.

Chapter 45 'Momentary'

"So," said Em, as the three of them walked down the end of Mifflin St in the night. "Do either of you two want to tell me what we're doing? Or maybe you can explain why you're both dressed like cat burglars?"

"Depends on if I'm going to get into trouble or not," said Henry, giving her his cheeky grin.

"I'm reliably informed by the television that this is the appropriate attire for breaking and entering," said Ri.

Em shook her head at them in mock disapproval. "I can't believe you were going to do whatever it is that we're going to do without me. I'm an expert level troublemaker, guys. I feel so betrayed that you didn't consult me."

"I wanted you to come, Em," said Henry.

"I did too," said Ri. "But you were asleep and I thought you should rest."

Em shoved her hands into her hoodie pocket and kicked some gravel. Ri had noticed the change in her, they were close and knew each other so well. It was impossible that anyone could tell her secret from looking at her at this early stage, but she still felt the urge to cover up her middle. How much longer could she keep this a secret?

She tried to sound normal when she answered. "I'm fine."

"This is great!" said Henry, skipping ahead to turn around at the teens. "We could really do with your help, Em. With the three of us working together Operation Spitfire is going to be unstoppable!"

The White Rabbit

The others jumped at the noise of the glass shattering and grabbed paper serviettes to sop up the spill. The waiter came over to help clear the mess. Emma only just managed to scramble to her feet when Regina shoved past her to get out of the booth. She was cradling her hand as she escaped to the bathroom.

Mary Margaret whispered to Emma. "Is she ok?"

Emma nodded hastily. "Yeah. I'm sure it's just-"

"It's me isn't it."

"Er -" Emma wanted to reassure her otherwise but she wasn't quite sure that was the truth. "I'll go check on her."

Ruby saw her heading for the bathroom. "Oh Emma? When you guys make up, don't have sex in there. It's super filthy. Even I wouldn't."

Inside the bathroom (which was even more gross than Ruby had implied) Regina was pacing back and forth like a caged tiger with a look of murderous rage on her face. It was actually rather scary for more than one reason. Emma thought that this was maybe the first time she'd seen Regina actually look like the Evil Queen. She could imagine her being banished, trapped inside a dark castle, overflowing with rage and plotting revenge against those who had wronged her in life. But in all the ways she tried to picture it, one thing that stood out was how utterly alone the former Queen must've been.

"So… I'm here. If you want to talk about it," said Emma calmly.

"What?" Regina spat. "Do I look like I want to talk?"

"Or you can keep pacing around. The floor is kinda sticky in here. Yuck."

"I have to get away from here. I can NOT be around her right now. I shouldn't even be here!"

"Maybe. Maybe not."

"I was doing so well before you made me come here tonight. I had to sit through all of that and now I'm so angry I could-" Regina cut herself off abruptly and balled up her fists.

"You're right about one thing," said Emma. "You've been doing really well, you still are. Starting a new life isn't easy."

"Stop being so reasonable! If you had any idea of the thoughts that are going around my head right now..."

"Talk to me. Please. I can see you're really upset. Let it out."

Regina glared at her and confessed every spiteful thing she was imagining in her mind. Even her voice sounded deeper and more malevolent. The torrent of hate (some of it violent) shocked Emma at first but she knew that it was better out than bottled up inside. She knew the stories, she knew of Regina's capacity for malice, but she'd also never known anyone who felt everything this deeply. The depth of her hate was only outmatched by the depth of her love, which Emma was far more well-acquainted with.

I think this is what happens when you feel overwhelmed and angry at the world isn't it. You're in pain right now and every other time someone without your best interests at heart has come in and taken advantage of it, but this time you're not alone. I know that you won't make good on those threats but your anger is scaring you. You're afraid of losing me and Henry. But you won't. This is just a moment and it will pass. This anger isn't the only thing you have. It won't help you. But I will.

"How can Snow be so blase about it?" Regina was out of breath and her voice was hoarse from talking so much. "She was rubbing my face in it, in the fact that she can decide whether or not she gets married anytime she wants, like it's a matter of complete indifference. I never had that choice. She took that away from me. It changed the course of my entire life, it changed me. I couldn't choose to marry Daniel because of her, I couldn't refuse to marry the King. I had no choice!"

"You'll never be in that position again. I promise. You're safe now."

"I don't know if I want to get married ever again!" Regina bit her lip and looked away when she realised what she'd said.

"That's ok."

"Why is it ok?"

"Um, I'm not sure what you mean," said Emma slowly. "Do you want me to propose to you so that you can exercise your right to say no?"

"No. Yes- I mean- I don't know what I'd say."

"If I did ask would you feel pressured to say yes? Even if you actually wanted to?"

Regina didn't answer, she merely looked vulnerable. How long had she been worrying about this? Emma was seriously considering what she was going to say next. She was trying hard to be sensitive, she understood why Regina might be not want to get married again but she really didn't get why she was so upset about it as if this had to be decided here and now. Didn't she know that Emma would never pressure her?

Then Emma realised. Oh shit. This very evening I did exactly that and coerced her into coming here. But that was for her own good. Wasn't it? Regina deserves to have a normal life again and people deserve the chance to know the real her. There are so many things about her that I love. I want others to see some of what I see. Not for my sake though, for hers.

She's like the others, she was born a princess. They're from a different time and place where marriages were decided upon in an instant and nobody waited to discover if there were any dealbreakers, which was stupid considering that divorce was not an option. But unlike the others she got royally fucked over by a marriage she didn't even want.

Maybe she really did expect me to have proposed to her by now and she's been both hoping for and fearing it at the same time. We are headed in that direction eventually but we've never even talked about getting married. It must have made her wonder if I was as committed to this as she is, even though she doesn't know yet if she wants it. I pressured her into doing something tonight but I never made sure that she knew the final choice was still hers.

Ever since I moved in with her she's been supporting me through my shit and the whole time she's had this commitment anxiety bottled up inside her. But she was too busy dealing with me to let me in and help her. Why would she feel like she couldn't tell me?

"That kinda leaves me in a bit of a bind then," said Emma. "I'm not sure if you'd want me to ask you or not, and if I did ask it'd be hard for me to tell if you had any reservations about it. Either answer is fine, Regina. There's no time limit on it, it's kinda early for us to be thinking about this. I'm not ready. Everything between us has happened so fast: sharing a kid, falling in love, moving in together. Don't worry about what the Disney princesses out there were saying. If you don't want to get married yet - or if you never do - that's fine. If you don't know what you want, that's fine too. We'll decide everything together ok."

"I'm so confused. I wish I-" Regina closed her eyes. "I don't know."

"Is this your last wish? Is this the thing you're not sure if you want me to ask you?"

"Yes," Regina whispered.

"Ok. How about this. What if you ask me?"

Regina was visibly taken aback, as if the possibility hadn't even occurred to her. In some ways she was still Ri, the young girl of Royal birth who had been brought up expecting that someone else would decide when and who she would marry. Waiting for Ri to speak up could take forever and it seemed that her older self hadn't quite outgrown that. Whether it was her choice or not, she always did get into trouble when she held her emotions inside. Regina could've brought up the topic herself at any time but she hadn't - not until things got to breaking point. Literally.

Regina was still staring at Emma like she'd suggested they move under the sea.

Emma chuckled. "We're not in some medieval hellhole here, Regina. You're in the 21st century now. Inside the grotty bathroom of a dingy bar so this is hardly the place for a proposal. One day, if you change your mind and you decide that you really do want us to get married, then ask me. Or ask me to ask you. Or at least give me some sort of really obvious hint so I get the message. Spell it with your peas."

"Why would you even want to marry me? How can you, knowing how I feel towards your mother? I'm still dangerous. I'm not noble enough to suggest that you leave for your own sake, but I don't want you to get hurt. You risk that every day with me and every day that we're together we get more entangled. Eventually it may be too hard for you to let go. Why are you still here?"

"Because you're trying." Emma smiled. "I know you refer to her as my mother like that to remind yourself who she is to me and what you'd be risking. I only get wary when you start calling her 'Snow'. I know you're scared right now and it's alright to be angry when you have reason to be. But you don't need to cling to it anymore. It's not all you have left. I hope you know how much more you have in your life now."

"Of course I do. I have you and Henry."

"Can't you see? You have more than that. You've tried so hard to change and it's not just me, other people are starting to notice. You've got your job back and your freedom and you've got a lot of people on your side. Archie. Granny. Ruby. Astrid and Leroy. Kathryn and the girls tonight. My parents are on your side, even if you don't want them to be. Henry has always believed that you can be good. He loves you. And you've also got me. For better or for worse, as long I live.

I love you, Regina. I want to be with you. Maybe we will get married some day but you'll always be free to leave if ever you want to. I can't promise to fix all of your problems - because geez you come with a lot of them and so do I - but I can promise that you won't have to face that shit alone anymore."

In three strides Regina crossed the dirty tiles between them and threw herself into a pair of waiting arms. Emma wrapped her up tightly in a hug and lifted her off the floor.

Storybrooke Elementary, reception office

"Hey, nerd," said Em, reaching over to mess up Henry's hair. "Isn't this your school? Is this your lame idea of making trouble? It's Friday night, we could be anywhere. Don't you get enough of school during the day?"

Henry shrugged her off and smoothed his hair down. "It's not that! It's Operation Spitfire. We're here on a top secret mission to destroy the enemy's base of knowledge."

"Say again?"

"Repeat. Information critical to mission success is being held by hostile forces. Whatever we do, we can not return to headquarters until we destroy it. If anyone finds out before it's time, then it could be really bad. It could ruin everything."

Em raised an eyebrow over her black frames. "Yeah, so basically we're here to break in and hack the principal's computer?"

"Yes. That's why I need your help."

"Because I can get in and out of buildings easily, I can get into computers with no problems, and I can get around people without being seen. What is this for? Did you get a B minus on a test that you want changed to an A or something?"

"No. I get all A's."

"Of course you do." Em rolled her eyes and then turned to Ri, surprised that she'd gone along with it so far. "You agreed to this crazy idea?"

Ri nodded. "Yes?"

"Henry." Em grabbed his shoulder to stop him for a sec. She bent over to his level to look him in the eye. "Did you tell Ri everything?"

"Yeah. Kinda."

"Kid, she isn't your Mom yet. Ri's not from this world, you can't use that to take advantage of her, ok? Especially if it's to get her permission for something that she doesn't know is dangerous and/or illegal. That's not fair."

"Em, it's alright," said Ri. "Henry told me what happened at school. He told me who his school principal was and I recognised her right away from my world. I know her."

"You do?"

"Yes. She comes to the estate to see my mother but they are certainly not friends. She's rather infamous. She always was a horrible old b- person." Ri amended hastily.

Em regarded the two of them suspiciously for a second before deciding on the plan. "Okay. But we'll do it my way."

"Yes!" said Henry.

When the three of them were standing outside the door to the school's head office, Em stopped the other two so that she could peek in the windows and scope it out and check around for things like motion sensors and security cameras. She couldn't see any, though the entrance was well-lit and there was a sticker on the window for a security company.

Ooh a sticker, I'm so deterred. Not.

Em reached for the doorknob, which was locked, and it clunked without opening when she turned it. She tried it again a few more times and was surprised when the lock didn't slip open easily for her as usual when she was breaking in somewhere. Her magic was unreliable sometimes but she hadn't known it to fail her completely before.

What the hell? Nevermind then, plan B. Out of nowhere Em produced two flat pieces of metal about four inches long and with hooked ends. Recognised the lock as a basic pin-and-tumbler design, she inserted the metal pieces at an angle inside the keyhole and attempted to rake the lock. It took her a few tries but she managed to manipulate the pins into place. The deadbolt opened with a click.

"Awesome," said Henry. "Where did you learn to do that? Can you teach me?"

"No," said Em and Ri in unison.

Em pushed the door open and peered inside the darkened office. "Follow me, stay close, do exactly as I say. I'm going first."

The White Rabbit

Regina let Emma hold her for a while longer until she felt herself calming down. She felt Emma place a kiss in her hair and laid her head on her shoulder so that she could rest there. Emma had an inch or two of the height advantage for once, owing to the skyhigh stilettos she wore, but it was negated by the fact that Regina was now standing on the tops of Emma's toes.

It was amazing. Emma really had been telling the truth when she said Regina could trust her with anything. She'd listened to the darkest parts of her heart and offered sympathy in return. I used to doubt that anyone could love me fully, but Emma doesn't just love my redemption. She loves me. Including the part that barely survived the past and still lashes out occasionally. She actually loves all of me.

The bathroom door swung open and Kathryn came in. "Oh! Hi. Ashley and Mary Margaret are leaving. I've got to go soon to meet Tommy."

Emma pressed a discrete kiss to Regina's temple and then turned around towards Kathryn. "Thanks, I'll just go say goodnight."

She gave Regina a significant look and a silent communication passed between them:

"Here's your chance, Regina. Talk to her."

"Don't you dare abandon me!"

Once Emma left, Regina busied herself at the mirrors above the sink like she was checking her makeup, even though she had no fixers with her. Kathryn came over next to her to do the same but she didn't say anything. Regina examined her hand where she'd been holding the glass that shattered and there was only a slight scratch so she ran cold water over over it for a minute or so. Her hands were still covered in Bloody Mary and they felt sticky and unclean. Even the air felt germy in this wretched excuse for a washroom.

"Have I done something wrong, Regina?" said Kathryn, eyeing her reflection in the mirror.

Regina was surprised by the question. Why would Kathryn ask if she had done anything wrong? She was the one who had been used to prevent a relationship, then been kidnapped and held in a basement by a deranged imp and found days later. Regina knew she should find a way to apologise, but the words were stuck in her throat. How could she even begin to justify what she'd done to this innocent woman. Why did she care so much? In the past she'd had no qualms about using anyone or anything to enact her revenge upon her enemy.

Ugh. Where did this empathy come from? It's so uncomfortable...

Kathryn gave her a small smile. "I've been wondering why I hadn't heard from you since before the curse broke. I heard what happened. It sounded like you could have done with an ally. I wish you would've called me."

"But I couldn't-" Regina said weakly. "After what I did-"

"Regina. I'm a princess, I'm the daughter of a King who can make anything he touches turn to gold. I've been abducted seven times. If I haven't received a threat of extortion by lunchtime I get suspicious."

Regina was too stunned to respond for the second time that night. The woman before her - who she'd caused deliberate harm to for her own purposes - was concerned about her. How could this be? In her former life as the Evil Queen and before that as the emotionally neglected daughter of a disgraced prince and an evil sorceress, she had never experienced this kind of forgiveness or offer of support. Emma was right, it wasn't just Kathryn. She saw now that there had been others as well. Did this parade of sickening do-gooders really want to see her come through it? Maybe things really were changing for her in response to her own efforts.

But isn't this what I wanted? I wanted them to see that I could change and now that they are it's so unexpected that I don't know how to take it.

"Thanks for coming tonight," said Kathryn. "It means a lot to me. Sorry about all the marriage talk by the way, but what do you expect from a table full of princesses? And Ruby, who has no filter."

Without needing much encouragement Kathryn kept up the conversation, asking her about how things were going with Emma and how Henry was doing. She seemed interested in helping with the upcoming election campaign too. She was acting like - for the lack of a better word - a friend. Kathryn's easy-going nature was contagious and before she knew it Regina had agreed to the suggestion to resume their friendship from the point before last year's unpleasantness by meeting her for coffee sometime soon.

Kathryn spied the time on her watch. "Now I really have to go! Tommy could be waiting somewhere with a giant 'Marry me' banner and a quartet of violins."

"Yes, of course," said Regina. "You don't want to miss that. Emma and I should go too. We told the girls we'd be back before Henry went to bed."

Mary Margaret was putting on her coat when Emma went up to her at the door, ready to say her goodbyes.

"Regina didn't cut herself on the glass did she?" said Mary Margaret.

"No, she's alright," said Emma. She didn't elaborate on the freakout and the talk afterwards but her mother gave her the kind of knowing look that meant she suspected there was more to it.

"Emma, while I've got you here..." said Mary Margaret. "What's happening with the shrinking border? Have you found out how to reverse the spell yet? I finally heard back from the Blue Fairy and she has no magical input to give, but she is concerned about the lack of progress particularly with regards to your leadership. I've been in contact with the War Council and they say you haven't given them orders in quite some time."

Emma was taken aback. "Uh - what? The last time Leroy checked with me he said the border was stalled. It hasn't moved closer in ages. Why do we have to worry about it if it's not going anywhere?"

"We need to know why it's stopped for the same reason we need to know why it was shrinking. We don't have control over it. You know what's at stake here, Emma. What have you done about figuring this out? Have you done anything yet?"

The disapproval in her tone set Emma on the defensive and immediately her sense of injustice flared. Why was it her responsibility to lead them and figure this shit out? She'd never asked to be the Saviour or a princess or the Council leader or any of it. The only thing she'd wanted was a family, but hers had come packaged with duties she couldn't get out of apparently.

"I'll get around to it," Emma said shortly. "I've had other stuff to do. I'm still figuring things out with Regina so that our relationship has a chance. She's going through some stuff right now. We're trying to give Henry some stability and at the same time we're taking care of two sneaky teenagers. Plus I have my normal job and Regina is running for an election. For the first time in my life I've got parents and- … I'm sorry! I don't know how to be someone's daughter. Give me a break ok."

"Ok." Mary Margaret smiled. "I'm sure you've got everything under control. Please try to remember that you're also a Royal, Emma. We have a responsibility to the people of the realm and we must protect them as we would our own family. They trust us for a reason."

Her anger was doused in an instant and Emma suddenly felt about two inches tall. They don't even know that they could soon lose everything, their memories, their relationships, their happy endings… and it'll be my fault. But I have no idea how to stop it! What am I going to do?

"I have to go now and pick up your father, but thanks for coming tonight. Kathryn really wanted to see Regina for her birthday and we knew the only way to get her here was to offer you as bait. Ashley thinks you two look cute together by the way. Ruby thinks you two would look cute in her bed… I think she was only half joking."

Mary Margaret leaned in to kiss Emma's cheek. "Have a good night, honey. Let us know if you need anything."

Principal Gander's office

"Have you found it yet, Em?" whispered Henry. He was hanging in the doorway by one hand. He'd been pestering her every five seconds since she booted up the principal's computer which was so old it took ten minutes.

"Kid!" Em hissed at him but didn't stop typing furiously. "You're supposed to be keeping a lookout. Get back out there!"

Ri was hovering near her side, watching Em as she typed and clicked through various things on the computer.

"What kind of television is this?" said Ri.

"It's more than just a TV, it's a computer. Like Henry's laptop thing that we watch movies on. This one's got all sorts of work stuff on it. Student records, course notes, interviews with parents …"

Ri draped her arms around Em's neck and kissed her cheek. She whispered in her ear. "You look so sexy right now. Is that the correct usage of the word?"

Em turned her face and did a double-take. Ri was staring at her lips like she wanted to kiss her. "Really?"

"Yes."

"Uhh- " Em blinked slowly. Oh God, I want her so badly right now. Wait, what? Seriously what's up with these crazy hormones taking over my body? What I wouldn't give to have my hands on her skin or have her sitting in my lap or to kiss her breathless. Or all of those things. I'm totally picturing making love in my head and getting all hot and bothered by it. I knew the first time we met that she'd be my everything and it's true. Sigh, she's so beautiful and amazing and oh wow-

"Shouldn't you be doing something," teased Ri. "Instead of staring down my shirt?"

"Yes!" Em snapped out of her daze. "Sorry. I mean - Ri, don't distract me. I'm breaking like ten laws here."

Em continued working through the computer. She pushed her glasses up her nose and scanned the document she opened. "Hm, what's this."

"It says my name and yours and Henry's too. It's all about magic and the curse and Fairytale Land. There's what happened with Henry at school the other day when he nearly got expelled. Later it's saying something about Mary Margaret and Cora. There's even stuff about that gimpy Mr Gold here. There's a map of Storybrooke with a yellow line around it. Even some stuff about your parents, Ri. What the hell is she keeping all these sketchy notes on magical happenings in Storybrooke for?"

"Mother Goose is no fan of magic," said Ri, with a somber shake of the head.

"Mother Goose. Seriously? Isn't she the one who wrote a bunch of nursery rhymes and shit?"

"Yes, but her intention was to draw children in by spinning incredible tales in order to promote anti-magic sentiments to innocent minds on the side. She is very superstitious. My mother hates her, which ordinarily ought to be a point in her favour, but it sounds like she's taken a dislike to Henry as well. I don't think she approves of our family at all."

There was a beat while the teenagers shared a fierce glare with each other. Neither of them was going to stand by while their son was being victimised. It never was wise to get between a mother and her cub. Or two mothers and their cub. As Principal Gander was about to learn.

"Oops! I permanently deleted the file," said Em. "Oh no. Sorry to have ruined your evil plans, Mother G. I'm also getting rid of the record of Henry's misbehaviour from his academic record on the school server. I'll make it say he got a commendation instead, for standing up to a bully."

"But won't she know that it's gone?"

"Maybe, but it won't stop the fact that she's lost her proof. No-one messes with my kid."

Em kept clicking the mouse and doing whatever she was doing with the files. It'd been a while since Henry had popped his head inside the door. She stopped what she was doing to listen for any suspicious sounds. She thought she could hear dull footsteps but it was probably just her imagination. Was it Henry maybe? Where had that kid gotten to?

The footsteps got louder. It was definitely not Henry. The girls froze. Ri shot her a look of alarm at the faint sound of a set of keys jingling.

"Ri," said Em quietly. "Go check on Henry while I finish this. When you find him both of you go wait outside."

"Are you sure?" whispered Ri worriedly. "What about you?"

"I'll catch up. I'm like Houdini, remember? I'm just making sure I've covered my tracks. I'm downloading a bit of gay porn and malware for good measure. After I'm through with this thing Gander won't want it for anything other than to use as a paperweight."

Ri was reluctant to leave. Em nodded quickly and shooed her to the door with a flick of her wrist. "Go!"