AN: GAH I am so sorry for the lateness of this chapter! Please forgive me T_T.
SIGUEMOS! Btw this English lesson is so valid for me right now since all I do is teach it lol.
Disclaimer: Yes yeah I dun' own it.
"Ask me in English." Aidou grinned evilly, speaking in English himself.
Yuuki sighed. Trying to form a sentence in English was like asking her to reassemble a piece of machinery from a hundred years ago. She could feel the dusty cogs groaning to life in her mind. After what seemed like an eternity, she managed to fumble out the tattered remnants of a thought process.
"Water… wo… I can… Has? Pleezu?"
Aidou smacked his forehead. "No! There's no 'wo' in English! And the order of the sentence is all wrong!" He groaned. "Okay, go get some water, but when we come back, double the studying."
"No!" she cried in despair.
"You should at least be able to ask for water before we end today. It's not rocket science," he retorted acridly.
"I can't tell the difference," she muttered as she went to get a glass of water.
This past week, Aidou had been working her even harder than usual. She wasn't sure why he was suddenly more fervent than ever about her studying, but she knew that she hated it. Especially when the subject was English. She had never quite passed the subject in school, and it was only through remedial classes that she had managed to dig out grades high enough to put her through to the next level.
She grabbed a glass and filled it with water from the tap, ignoring the chattering of the servants as they tried to take it from her and bring her some sort of fancy water they kept in one of the fridges. She still hadn't gotten used to Kaname-sama's high standard of living. Having servants around to wait on her only made her feel uncomfortable. They seemed to watch her wherever she went. She had to wonder if they were reporting everything she did to her brother.
She drained her glass and set it down on the counter, pausing thoughtfully with her hand still around the object. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed one of the servants eyeing it discreetly, undoubtedly waiting for the right moment to snatch it up. She quickly forgot about the servant, however, as her mind clouded with thoughts of her brother.
Lately, he had seemed more pensive and brooding than usual. He often vanished into the deeper rooms of the house for hours at a time, returning mysteriously without a word. Yuuki didn't press him for details, but she was concerned. There was something dark in his eyes when he looked at her that hadn't been there before, and even after draining away so much of her blood, he hadn't offered his own to her. She strongly felt that he was hiding something from her.
For a moment, the mental reminder of her thirst burst through her like agonizing fireworks, cracking outwards through every vein hotly. She took a quick breath, setting down the glass and turning to walk back to the study. She turned her thoughts away sharply. She couldn't think about that now. She shouldn't think about anything now except her lessons. They were the only way she could keep herself distracted at the moment.
She squared her shoulders, forcing the last hint of thirst back with practiced willpower. She had to be stronger than this. The only thing she should think of right now was English. With that in mind, she returned to her desk in the study, turning her attention back to the cursed subject that she could never make much sense out of.
A knock on the door brought Yori out of her book.
"What?" she asked miserably from her bed, frowning at the door. She was sick with a bad cold and wanted to be left alone with her books and her thoughts.
"Sorry to bother you when you're sick," the voice on the other side of the door apologized. "But we got a handout today about the spring dance, so I thought you might want one. I'm slipping it under your door, okay?"
"Okay," she responded hoarsely. She heard the paper slide under the door frame, but she barely paid attention. The dance had little appeal to her without Yuuki. The winter dance had certainly been painful enough. In fact, she wasn't even sure why she had gone to the winter dance at all.
For a long time, she ignored the flier and continued reading her novel. At last, however, her curiosity spurred her out of bed. She wobbled for a moment unsteadily on her feet, head pounding with the change in pressure from standing, and then shuffled forward to retrieve the paper. Her eyes scanned it disinterestedly for a moment, and then suddenly locked onto the words that described the theme.
In bold type, she read: Masquerade Dance
Despite her cold, she felt suddenly uplifted with excitement. This was perfect! What better chance to invite Yuuki to visit than at a masquerade ball? No one would recognize her. Aidou could come as well, and wouldn't stand out in the crowd. Moreover, if Yuuki wanted a second chance to see Zero, this would be it.
She smiled with pleasure, glancing at the calendar hopefully. It shouldn't be long now before Yuuki's next test. Yori only hoped that she did well enough to warrant bringing a letter. She was impatient to tell her friend about the upcoming dance.
Yuuki stared at the blank paper, eyes glossing over glassily. Make a composition in English? She didn't even know how to say that in English. Anyway, what would she even write about? There were so many options, but somehow all of them seemed terribly painful at the moment. She could write about her memories of the academy, or her friends, or the Chairman, or even her days here at the mansion. She could write about the ball or her brother. Yet, all of these ideas were filled with a loneliness that she couldn't shake. The pencil remained hovering over the paper, indecisive.
Where had she gone wrong? When had this downward spiral truly begun? At the academy, perhaps, when she had her memories restored and her existence changed back to that of a vampire. But even then, she could have been happy. If she had stayed at the academy, if she had not lost so many people that were so close to her. If she had not lost Zero…
Yes, that was probably it… If only she hadn't lied to Zero back then, when she had faced him across the closed door and told him that there was nothing left of the human Yuuki inside her… She had known, then, that she was breaking away from him completely and leaving him to remain at Kaname-sama's side. She had only fed Zero's hatred for vampires in that moment. She had thought it was the only way to separate herself from him.
What if she had never told him those words? The pencil dropped down against the paper heavily, a leaden weight in her hand. What if she had confessed to him instead of how unsure she had felt, how nothing had changed except this new, terrifying thirst for blood..?
Her eyes fell shut, lips trembling. She knew. If she had refrained from saying those cursed words, he would have accepted her in time. Even though she was a vampire, his love for her would have won out over his hatred of vampire kind. He would have only hated her brother more for changing her. And if, by some chance, he had stopped her on that night and asked her to stay with him at the academy…
The pencil quivered in a quick rhythm against the paper. She could almost see it in her mind. As she turned to walk away, his fingers would have slipped around her wrist, holding her back. With those beautiful, anguished eyes, he would have asked her to stay with him. He would have told her what was in his heart with that single question.
She would have stayed.
Her chest contracted in sudden pain, eyes opening to see the room spinning around her. She would have stayed. There would be no loneliness now. None of this would have ever happened. She wouldn't have been bound to Kaname-sama in this double-edged, agonizing promise.
With trembling fingers, Yuuki moved the pencil aside, laying her head down against the paper and trying to blot out her thoughts. She needed her mind to be as blank and calm as the sheet of paper. She had a composition to write, and only an hour to do so. Instead, she could feel herself falling between the lines, into an abyss of roiling thoughts that she couldn't restrain.
She loved Kaname-sama. She was going to spend eternity with him. But back on that night, if Zero had asked, she would have stayed… She would have stayed with Zero forever and been happier than she could ever be now…
The loneliness was consuming her.
Zero slammed his hand against the wall, feeling the power from that strike ripple outwards as the plaster shuddered violently. His breath came shakily, clouded with buzzing anger that boiled inside of him. He was aware that he was trembling, fangs slashing against his lip and eyes blazing hotly into the night, but he didn't care. He couldn't focus on that. The only thing his mind was capable of thinking of was the final sentence Yuuki had uttered before disappearing.
"It's okay if I'm punished."
Black swirled before his eyes. What the hell… What the hell?! His teeth cut into his lip brutally, drawing blood. His other hand clutched at the gun by his side, and he felt a little calmer with the touch of the cold metal against his palm. An anti-vampire weapon could kill a vampire. It could kill Kaname Kuran if he shot it accurately. He sneered underneath the streetlights. Right now, he would love nothing more than to put a bullet between the pureblood's monstrous eyes.
He could not stand the thought of Yuuki being punished. She was not some dog who had misbehaved. Yuuki was precious, and she should never be... His fingers clamped down against the gun, letting the steel bite into his hand. He was pushing Yuuki away for her happiness, for her own good. But if the relationship between Yuuki and her beloved Kuran was like this…
Then why the hell wasn't he putting up a fight?
In the end, he could never refute Yuuki's decisions. She had chosen Kuran, and if she was happy like that… The thought sent infuriation coursing through his veins. How could she be happy like that? Locked away like some kind of pet, some kind of possession, punished if she stepped out of line… The Yuuki he knew could never live happily like that. The Yuuki he knew was made of sunshine, and to keep those rays of light inside a box was just…
He leaned back against the wall heavily. What did he have to offer her? Nothing. He didn't deserve her. He knew that. All he could do was drag her down into the darkness along with him. While he wouldn't put a physical lock on that cage, like Kuran had, she would be metaphorically locked into a black pit beside him. He couldn't do that to her. Yuuki needed light. She needed freedom. She needed love without such suffocating restrictions. He was all too aware that he could never give her the life that she deserved. But now, knowing just how skewed that relationship was, having seen the look of ownership glinting in Kuran's eyes at the ball…he doubted that Kuran would give her such a life, either.
His hand squeezed even harder against the metal of the gun. What was he supposed to do? What could he possibly do? Yuuki's happiness was more important than anything else, wasn't it? And she had chosen to live with Kuran, hadn't she? That was all he should need to know. More than that, she had begged the pureblood to take her home. Her decision was clear. He was the one who was getting confused.
Zero pushed himself off the wall, fury still tumultuous inside of him, throat dry with the unquenchable thirst that had become all too familiar. If he couldn't take his anger out on Kuran himself, he would have to make do with the Level E's running wild.
His mouth twisted into a smirk again, feeling the anticipation of the hunt kick in. Through the lens of his imagination, every Level E he killed tonight would have Kuran's face.
Aidou looked as though he were about to have an aneurism. He slammed the test down on her desk, demanding, "What the hell is this?!"
Yuuki glanced fearfully at the test. She already guessed that she had failed, but she didn't want to see the grade. She had always been horrible at English, and even a C had always seemed to elude her, no matter how much she studied. Aidou was a better teacher than the one at the academy, but she still just couldn't grasp many aspects of the language… With a swallow, she forced herself to comprehend the number written at the top of the paper.
Quickly, she snatched the paper away from him, suddenly overcome with delight. "An 83! I got an 83! I can't believe it!" She danced around the room with the test, elated. She had never gotten a C before, and now she had a B?! It was surreal. She had never thought it possible.
She shot a glance at Aidou. Why did he seem so upset? She'd passed, hadn't she? With a good mark, too! He would still get to visit Yori, and maybe next week he would even pick an easier subject. Despite all that, he was rubbing his forehead and looking extremely disappointed.
"What's wrong, Aidou-senpai?" she asked.
"Nothing," he moped, lips dragging down the sides of his mouth.
"I got an 83! It's amazing! And it's such a cute number, too!" She giggled at the paper. "It looks like a face. It's adorable." She hugged the test to herself with pride.
"You did good," he admitted, though the tone was morose.
"Are you thirsty again?" she asked curiously, wondering if maybe that was the cause for his strange behavior yet again.
"Am I..? What?" He seemed confused. Then, "No! Look, it's nothing, okay? Just forget it."
"Okay," she replied dubiously. Then, a moment later, brightening further, she asked, "Are we done for the day, then?"
"Yes."
"Yay! Oh, and here," she handed him her letter, which he tucked into his pant pocket immediately.
"Thanks."
"Are you-" she was about to ask him again about his mood, when the door opened and Kaname-sama walked in.
"Onii-sama!" she greeted him, holding up her test. "Look! An 83 in English! Isn't it cute?"
He gave her a small smile. "Very good, Yuuki." He glanced at the blond. "Can you leave us alone for a few moments?"
"Of course, Kaname-sama." Aidou bowed respectfully and took his leave. Yuuki was sure it wouldn't be long before he made some excuse to the servants and went out to see Yori.
"Yuuki, I must speak with you." There was something ominous in the words that fell from Kaname-sama's lips.
Yuuki looked up at her brother, eyes clouded with sudden doubts. Still, the words buzzed automatically from her mouth.
"Yes, onii-sama?"
AN: Tune in next time for: Cranky Kaname and the Krusty Krab! Kay not really but… Somehow the image of Kaname working alongside Squidward makes me giggle.