Two long agonizing days of waiting, were pure hell, that was what Sonny had been through, in the last 48 hours. He would guess that he had picked up the phone a million times to call Will, to text him, looking just to check and see if by some sick twist of fate, he may have missed a call. He looked at his call log to see if he had any missed calls. Went to his messages, seeking Will's name, looking to make sure his phone had not failed him. It hadn't rang, and even though he hadn't been more than two feet from his phone at any given moment, he still checked it at least once an hour, and each time he did, there was the same result, there was nothing there, just a blank screen staring back at him.
He hadn't left the apartment, not even for a minute. He had called Chad and asked him to take over at the club. He didn't want to miss Will if he came by, but with every hour that passed he was fast losing hope. He was becoming more and more despondent. He didn't want to be around people. He was tired, on edge and snappy, even with his own reflection. He was better off being alone.
Will was going to take him back ... Right? He had to, Will loved him, and Sonny knew that, without a shadow of a doubt. In fact before Paul had come to town and ruined everything, he could see it every time Will looked at him. He could practically feel it whenever they were in the same room. Before Paul, things were very different…
Paul being here, in Salem, had changed a lot of things... Will was different somehow. Sonny forced himself to think about the last few times he had seen Will… He was arguably less mopey and seemed to be happier, he was less... clingy... Well, clingy was not quite the word he had been looking for, Will was never clingy, but he was around more.. he had spent a lot of time at the club. Now, since Paul had shown up Will didn't come around near as often as he used to.. And sometimes when Will talked about Paul, Sonny saw a sparkle in Will's eyes... A sparkle that had been absent for nearly two years.
Sonny groaned aloud... "Oh God...he moaned to the empty room." He felt despair take up residence in his heart. "You waited too long... Will is already in love with Paul... And it is too late for you." That little voice in the back of his mind mocked him….Those words reverberated in his head. He had been soo sure that Will would never love anyone else, he thought that he pursuing a relationship with Paul, to try to make Sonny think that he was moving on, maybe even to fool himself into thinking that he was moving on, sort of a pride thing. But he hadn't been doing that at all, he had actually been moving on...
Sonny felt a tear slip out of his eye and slide down his face, followed by countless others. He had been so stupid… How had he missed the signs when they were right there in front of him? If nothing else set off any alarms, the night he had babysat Arianna for Abigail sure should have... Will had yelled at him, throwing crazy accusations around, No not crazy, they were based in nothing but truth, and it seemed that Will remembered every single horrible word he had ever uttered to him...because he had brought those up, in great detai. He had defended Paul...and he had done that because he was in love with him. No...he ruthlessly pushed that thought away. He was being paranoid, and remembering things wrong… Will had said he didn't love Paul. Wasn't that what he had said? He had said that he couldn't love him, because he hadn't known him that long…. right?
Sonny forced himself to think back to that precise moment, to remember Will's exact words... "Yeah... I think maybe I do..." That was what he had said. Word for word. A sob ripped from his throat, chasing away the silence that shrouded the apartment. Will was going to choose Paul and there was nothing that he could do to stop it... Nothing he could do now that would change Will's mind.
He curled up on the sofa, letting the tears fall freely. He had lost Will, for good. He could feel it deep down inside, and there was no one to blame but himself.
Hours later ... When the sun was no longer streaming in through the windows, and the darkness that enveloped his heart and colored his mood, also painted every nook and cranny of the room, there was a knock at the door... Will... He thought, his heart swelling with hope.
He jumped up and scrambled over to the door and flinging it open. Ready to pull Will into his arms and never let him go again.
"Paul?" He said in confusion... "What are you doing here?"
"We need to talk." Paul said, "Is it okay if I come in?"
"Guess so..." Sonny said, walking away, leaving the door open for him to enter if he chose to do so.
Paul came in and closed the door quietly behind him.
Sonny dropped back onto the couch. He had a sick feeling of dread in his stomach. Paul being here, did not feel like a good sign. "I guess you're here to gloat." He said. "You may as well go ahead and get it over with," he said. "I guess I deserve whatever you could say after all I put Will through."
"Actually, I don't have anything to gloat about, I haven't talked to Will since the morning he was here to see you." Paul said, "I came by to check on you and see how you are doing"
"What do you care? What difference could how I am doing possibly make to you?" Sonny snapped.
"I know that you still love Will, I know that you told him so and that you asked him for another chance." Paul said. "I'm sure this hasn't been easy for you. And I know it hasn't been easy on Will."
"So you just thought you would come here with your fake concern, pretending that you give a damn about me?" Sonny asked dejectedly. "You're the one trying to take him away from me."
"I am not trying to take Will away from anyone, let alone you. If you remember correctly, I came here for you… and you held up a ring and told me you were engaged the first time I saw you at the club. And it sure wasn't to Will."
Sonny looked at him, his eyes wild with emotion. "But you knew that I didn't want you to date him, I came to you and asked you not to. I asked you to leave him out of our mess. But you went on and did what you wanted, just like always, ignoring everyone else's feelings, but your own. So don't come here with your lies about how you never meant for this to happen."
"Believe it or not, I do care about your feelings, and that isn't a lie." Paul said. "That's why I am here." He sat down on the other end of the couch. "I loved you once, loved you a lot actually... And it never goes away, not completely."
"Yeah, you loved me soo much that you chose baseball over me….." Sonny said, glaring at him.
Paul sighed heavily. "Seriously Sonny... You have to let that go. We have been over and over it, and it is in the past." he said. "I followed my dream... And you would have done the same thing, if the tables had been turned."
"Maybe... Maybe not." Sonny said stubbornly. "I guess we will never know."
"Look, believe whatever you want."Paul said, "This isn't what I came here to talk about anyway."
"Then what do you want?" Sonny asked. "You want to know if I have heard from Will? Well you can relax because I haven't, now take your misplaced empathy for the situation that you created and get the hell out of here." He ranted.
"I know that you believe that I purposefully went after Will to hurt you or make you jealous... And I wanted you to know that I didn't plan any of this." Paul said. "We met, and something just clicked and I fell for him... Hard."
"If you would have just left Will alone like I asked you too." Sonny said, "Things would be very different right now."
"Yeah, you're right, they would be." Paul acknowledged. "Will would be miserable and alone and things with you and Brian would be right on track…."
"That's not what I meant." Sonny sneered. "Will wouldn't have any trouble coming back to me if it wasn't for you. He wouldn't have even had to think about it for a second."
"Well, I'm not so sure about that." Paul said. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news… but that guy Brian… you know, your fiancé, you remember him right?... he is sort of standing in the way of your happily ever after with Will, in case you hadn't noticed."
"Not that it is any of your business but I plan on going and telling him in person, I think he deserves at least that much…" Sonny said.
"Ah, I see well good luck with that." Paul said. "I really didn't come here to fight. I wanted to be honest with you, and tell you that I hope that Will chooses me, it will break me, if he doesn't because I honestly think he deserves to be with someone that Will love him and support him despite his faults. But if he does choose you, If that is what he really wants, then I will not stand in his way. His happiness is what's important to me. And once this is all over, no matter what happens, I hope that we can put all of these hard feelings behind us and be civil to each other maybe even be friends."
Sonny snickered. "You think I could ever forgive you, for what you have done?" he asked.
"I haven't done anything except fall in love, and I am truly sorry that it cost you even a minute's pain." Paul said, getting up and walking toward the door. "I can see that this was a bad idea. So I will see you around." He said. "Good bye Sonny."
Sonny sat on the couch motionless long after he heard the soft click of the door closing behind Paul. It seemed that Will wasn't the only one that had changed.
Where was the Paul that he knew all those years ago. It certainly wasn't the man that had just walked out of his apartment. Since when had Paul given a damn about anyone besides himself? When had he ever been concerned about someone else's feelings? NEVER, that's when. Sonny thought to himself. The Paul that he knew back then would do whatever it took to get his way… well whatever it took aside from going public…. But he had done that, hadn't he. He had been seen all over town, hugging Will, kissing Will, Hell he had allowed Will to write an article announcing it to the world.
He was bitter that it had happened now. But not for the reason's that he had always thought he would be. He would have thought that he would be bitter because he did for someone else, but in truth, he was bitter because Paul was free to be with Will whenever and however he wanted. The fact that he hadn't been enough for Paul to want to do that for him, was irritating, but not really all that painful. He hadn't been enough for Paul to even consider coming out. Every single time Sonny brought it up, Paul shut him down, he would start a make out session, change the subject, get off the phone, leave the room, whatever he needed to do to avoid the conversation, that's what he did.
Sonny laid his head back against the couch, Will needed to hurry this the hell up, he was not going to be able to take much more…..
Paul wandered around town until he finally ended up in the park, ironically at the playground where he had last played with Arianna. He went over to the bench and sat down. If he concentrated hard enough he could almost hear Ari's laughter as he pushed her on the swings.
Will and Arianna had changed his life. They had filled up all the empty spots with love and laughter, and driven out all of the loneliness that had plagued him since he had hurt his arm. Paul had been through some really dark days when he had gotten the news that he would never play ball again. Everything that was a constant in his life was gone in a split second, with one little sentence from the surgeon.
All he had been able to think about at that time was that he had to get control over his life, and to do that he needed familiarity and routine. His thoughts had immediately turned to Sonny. If he could get Sonny back, then everything would level out again. Sonny could bring order back to his world. So he had purposefully looked for him, searched him out and came to this town on a mission to get him back, no matter who was in the way, or what the consequences were.
But then Sonny had shot him down, cold. He had held up a wedding band and dashed Paul's hopes at normalcy. Then it had become a challenge… not a necessity, just a challenge. And to be honest, looking back in hind sight Sonny telling him no, hadn't hurt him nearly as much as it should have, not if he was supposed to love him beyond measure.. right? And then faith had intervened and there had been Will.
Will was unlike anyone he had ever met before. He was a breath of fresh air. And Paul was enamored right from the start. Will had changed him, whether he knew it or not Will was making him a better person, molding him into the kind of person that he should have been all along. For the first time in this life, someone else's feelings mattered more than his own, he wanted someone else's happiness over anything that he wanted or needed.
He closed his eyes, trying to think of his future without Will. It was bleak, and lonely looking. It honestly didn't look appealing at all. He was beginning to wish that he had taken advantage of just one of those times that they had come dangerously close to making love. That kind of physical closeness, created a special type of bond. One that Will already had with Sonny from the past. It was kind of a double edged sword. On one hand, if he had done that the bond may have been advantageous. But only the other hand he was glad that they had avoided it so far… because it would be a million times harder to let him go and he was already going to have it difficult if it come to that.
He really wanted to go across the street and literally beg Will, if that were necessary to just choose him, but he would not do that. He refused to make this more difficult for Will than it had to be.
Paul was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he did not realize that he was not alone.
"Paul?" a soft voice drew him out of him thoughts.
He turned on the bench, looking to see who had called him.
"Mrs. Dimera?" he asked, "What are you doing out so late? He asked, frowning down at his watch when he saw that it was nearing ten at night.
"I had to meet Lucas for dinner to talk about the kids." She said. "He can't come to the mansion because he and EJ fight like little kids on the playground at school..." she laughed.
"Ahh" He said, chuckling with her.
"What are you doing here?" she asked. "It's getting pretty late."
"Thinking." He said honestly.
"About anything in particular?" she asked.
Paul nodded, "About your son actually." He said.
"Oh?" she asked.
"Yeah." He said without elaborating. "Want to sit down?" he asked, sliding over making room.
She sat down and put her purse in her lap. "You know we never did get to finish our conversation the other day." She said.
Paul snickered , "You mean the interrogation?" Paul asked grinning at her.
"Well…. Yeah." Sami said, grinning back. She liked his easygoing sense of humor.
"Well, fire away." Paul said. "Ask me anything you like, but I should probably warn you that it may all be for nothing."
"Why would you say that?" She asked. "My son seems to be crazy about you."
"Well yeah, we were getting along pretty good." Paul admitted.
"Buttt…." Sami said, sensing there was something that Paul wasn't telling her.
"But Sonny still loves him and he told him so." Paul answered.
"Are you kidding me right now?" Sami asked. "Sonny had plenty of opportunities to tell him that over the last two years, before you arrived, before Will found happiness again. Back when he was miserable. And Sonny wasn't interested then. So what the hell is his problem now?"
"Well I guess he changed his mind." Paul said quietly.
"And let me guess… Will is going back to him" She asked, disbelieving. "God that boy is most definitely my son, he inherited my special knack for making exceedingly bad decisions."
"I don't want him to go back to Sonny, but I honestly don't know what he is going to do, I don't think he has made a decision yet." Paul said.
"Well that is ridiculous, and I am going to put a stop to this right now." She said. Standing up, preparing to march off into the night.
"Sami," Paul called, using her first name in his haste to catch her. "Please don't do that." He asked.
"Don't do what?" She said, "Don't stop my son from making a huge mistake?"
"Don't try and make this decision for him." Paul said, "He needs to make it alone with no outside interference. So that he can choose what is going to make him happy…."
"Didn't you just hear what I said, I love my son, but he is sometimes amazing at making terrible decisions." She started ticking off instances of his poor choices on her fingers. "He slept with Gabi knowing he is gay, he lost Sonny to start with because he lied..He.""
Paul held up a hand. "I heard you. He said. "And yeah Will makes precarious decisions sometimes because he is following his heart. How can I fault him for that. Will slept with Gabi and from that union came Arianna, who is a ray of sunshine to everyone around her. She brings happiness to everyone she comes into contact with. And actually he lost Sonny, not because he lied, but because he couldn't lie anymore. That's commendable. Will is a good person with a good heart. He will make the right decision for himself." Paul said.
Sami looked at him amazed. "Aren't you afraid you will lose him?" she asked.
"Terrified actually." Paul answered. "If Will chooses Sonny, it will devastate my life. But what I really want is for Will to be happy, and if Sonny is what it takes to accomplish that… then that is what I want for him."
"You really love my son, don't you?" she asked.
Paul nodded. "More than even I realized." He affirmed.
"Well, you taught me something about love tonight Paul Narita." Sami said, "Not a lot of people have the privilege of saying that." She said.
"I'm just a guy trying to do what's right for the person he loves." Paul said. "No matter the outcome, I don't know how smart that is."
"Well I think it is pretty smart, and it shows how much you love him..…." She said, "You have my word, I won't interfere, but I will say that if Will let's you get away, then he isn't as smart as I give him credit for." She said standing up, "I have to get home. I hope Will makes the right choice." She said.
"Thanks Mrs. Dimera." Paul said." Can I walk you home?" he asked, wanting to be polite.
"No, but Thanks." Sami said, "EJ is sending the car."
"Oh, well okay, Good night then." He called as she rounded the corner and disappeared from site.
He sat there a few more minutes, saying a prayer that he had done the right thing. Then he got up and walked back toward the hotel.
Author's note: In the next chapter Will makes his choice known. I know that there are several "teams" reading this. Some want Will/Sonny, some want Paul/Will, some want, Paul/Sonny… I know some people will be upset and may stop reading and I just want to take this opportunity to say Thanks for coming with me on this journey. I never knew that it was going to cause such a response. For those of you sticking around, there will be much more to come, hang on to your seatbelts… things are going to kick up a notch or two in the next few chapters.