Strong Enough

by Melodramatic.FruitCup

Marianne Dixon, the younger half sister of Daryl, is trying to survive the end of the world like everyone else. The siblings rely on each other but will that be enough to overcome what the world throws at them? Their relationship will be tested in ways they couldn't imagine. And can she handle the new person she's becoming?

26. Chapter 26

A/N: Thank you for the follows and the favorites.

Thank you to brandibuckeye, SeverusSnape'sLove, Anonymous Howler, and x NikiSt x for the reviews. They're really appreciated.

This is a monster of a chapter compared to the other ones. It's 15,489 words long and to put that into perspective, if you average all of my other chapters together it comes out to about 3,500 words.

I apologize to anyone who doesn't like long chapters. Personally, I sometimes find them annoying but I didn't want to break this one up.

Enjoy!

---

Chapter Twenty-six

The water was cold and it was only the promise of a good meal that kept him standing in it up to his mid-thigh. The rising sun peeked through the trees and the morning light glinted off of the river.

Daryl and Marianne were standing far enough apart to keep their lines from tangling. Marianne looked ridiculous in the oversized waders they had found in the shed. Both siblings had poked fun at one another but they didn't take them off, caring more about staying dry than what they looked like.

They had been fishing for a little over half an hour with nothing to show for it but Daryl wasn't worried yet. Fishing took patience and he had plenty of it that morning.

A sudden chill ran up his body and a memory surfaced in his mind. He had taught Marianne how to swim in cold water. The public pool had been closed because of torrential rain but when the weather let up he clipped right through the fence and both of them slipped through. Marianne first and Daryl right behind. Back then he had always been right behind or right ahead, never far out of reach.

The pool had been cold. The Georgia sun hadn't been out in over a day and the rain was near freezing. He could clearly see the goosebumps that ran up and down her arms and legs but that hadn't stopped Marianne from plunging into the water.

"Any more bad dreams?" Daryl asked, breaking the companionable silence between them.

"Not that I can remember." Marianne reeled her line in fast and then let it settle. She hadn't had an episode in over two weeks and Daryl didn't know why. He was still waiting for her to confide in him, dismissing the idea that she would never tell him. It was only a matter of time.

"I think I got somethin'," Marianne said and Daryl looked at her line. He could see the tension and the line being pulled. Marianne took her time, letting the fish drag the line before she started reeling it in.

A good-sized bass appeared out of the water. It dangled in midair before Daryl caught it in the net they had brought with them. Marianne unhooked the struggling fish. Keeping it in the net, Daryl placed it on top of the cooler. While Marianne held it down to keep it from flopping onto the ground, Daryl took his knife and pierced the fish's brain. It stopped moving and Marianne opened the cooler, which they had filled with cold river water since they didn't have ice, so Daryl could put it in.

He thought about their future meal of bass and his stomach squeezed with hunger. There hadn't been any breakfast that morning after Maggie revealed the state of their food supply. Only Lori and Carl ate a granola bar each and Daryl had seen the guilt plainly on their faces.

Not long after, Daryl hooked one and reeled it in. They did the same thing, roles reversed. The morning continued, the calm disrupted only when one of them caught another fish.

---

Marianne had trouble keeping up with Daryl's pace. Each of them held a handle of the cooler that contained easily over fifty pounds of fish and had the waders precariously draped over it. Marianne carried the tackle box in her left hand, thankful that they decided to take the small one, and Daryl had the fishing poles and net in his right.

She hadn't felt her lack of sleep this keenly until the moment they started back to the house. They were walking uphill which made the trek harder for her. Cold sweat gathered on her brow. Not being able to wipe it away, she hoped Daryl wouldn't notice.

At least the fishing had brought a small piece of happiness, just enough to keep her remembering what it felt like. She got as close as she ever would of forgetting the shit world they lived in because, as a rule, she never forgot. The whole time she had kept her ears open for any unusual sounds coming from the forest behind them and kept an eye out for movement among the trees across the river.

She was thankful when they finally reached the house and they could set down the cooler just as her right shoulder was starting to ache. Carol, who was on watch, had seen them coming and alerted the group to their arrival. Almost everyone came out to meet them. Only Glenn and Maggie were missing and from the sound of an axe hitting wood Marianne guessed where those two were.

"Any luck?" Hershel asked, motioning towards the cooler. Everyone looked expectantly at them.

"We'll eat," Daryl said. He didn't elaborate any further and Marianne wasn't inclined to either. They'd see soon enough.

Rick stepped forward and Marianne grabbed the waders before backing away in the direction of the shed. She was going to put away the tackle box and hang the waders up to dry. She turned around just as Rick was bending over to open the cooler.

"They stink," Carl said with distaste in his voice. He wasn't wrong. The smell had quickly reached Marianne. Without ice, they needed to prep and cook the bass as soon as possible.

After she found a place to hang the waders and put the tackle box back where they'd found it, Marianne poked around the shed. Whoever owned this house knew a lot about fishing and she didn't doubt that they ate what they caught. She knew the fish knives were probably in the kitchen but it couldn't hurt to look around.

Having no luck in her search, she went outside. Earlier they had found a place at the side of the shed not visible from the house where the fish could be cleaned. There was a sturdy wooden table, the top of it darker in spots where blood had stained it. It stood on a concrete slab with a lean-to roof overhead that jutted out past the longest side of the concrete. There was also a small freezer to the left of the table that was useless to them.

She found T-Dog and Daryl there, placing the cooler on top of the freezer. The knives were already laid out on the table.

Marianne sighed. It wasn't that she was averse to working but her head was beginning to hurt, she was exhausted, and the smell of raw fish was making her stomach turn.

Daryl took one look at her and shook his head. "Go rest. You look like you're gonna keel over."

Marianne simply nodded, too tired to argue that she could keep going. A flash of surprise crossed Daryl's face. He had clearly been expecting a fight.

She stopped herself from trudging into the house, not wanting to advertise her exhaustion to people who would just bug her about it because they were worried, which was still a novelty to her.

Marianne kept a normal pace until she was able to collapse onto one of the couches. She leaned her head back and stared at the ceiling where wooden beams had been added to, presumably, make the place feel more rustic.

The wood looked like a type of oak but she couldn't be sure. Marianne focused on the wood grain, tracing patterns with her eyes and slowly hypnotizing herself. Her eyelids were getting heavier and each time she blinked it took her longer to open them. Without realizing it, she drifted off to sleep.

Marianne jerked awake, disoriented for a moment before she came to the conclusion that she must have fallen asleep. She was no longer sitting up, but stretched out on the couch with blankets on top of her and her head on a pillow. She sat up and pushed the blankets off of her. From the amount of sunlight coming through the windows she guessed it was evening.

The smell of cooked fish hung in the air, making her stomach rumble. She turned around and looked towards the dining room. The whole group, minus Daryl and Rick, was sitting at the table, some of them using camper chairs she had seen in the shed earlier.

"Hey there Sleeping Beauty," T-Dog said.

"If you value your life, you'll never call me that again." Her voice came out raspy. She really needed a drink of water and she really needed to eat.

Marianne stood up and began walking to the dining room.

"I hope we didn't wake you up. We were all tryin' to be quiet," Maggie said.

Marianne shook her head. "How long was I asleep?" She asked the room.

"About six hours," Hershel said.

"What? Y'all should've got me up." There were always chores to be done and now she definitely wouldn't be falling asleep tonight.

"We all thought you needed the rest. And you did," Hershel said. Marianne sighed. She couldn't argue with that but that didn't mean she had to be happy about it.

"Here, let me fix you a plate," Carol stood up and headed to the kitchen before Marianne could protest. Instead of going after Carol, Marianne walked around the table and took the empty seat between Carl and T-Dog. Almost everyone's plates only had a little bit of fish left on them and some were empty. Marianne had woken up at the tail end of their dinner.

Carol soon arrived out of the kitchen and placed a plate, a knife, and a fork in front of Marianne. Marianne stared at the plate, not making a move to begin eating. The right corner of her mouth lifted a little. There were three days worth of their current food rations on her plate, entirely consisting of fish.

"This is mine?" She knew the fish wouldn't keep more than a day so of course she knew they'd all be eating well but for some reason she hadn't pictured it would be so much, even though she had seen firsthand how much fish they had caught.

There were chuckles around the table that Marianne ignored.

"We're all on our seconds," Glenn said.

"All of y'all are gonna get sick," Marianne said as she picked up her knife and fork. Their stomachs had become unaccustomed to such bounty but after Marianne took her first bite, she was planning to eat her fill and then some.

---

Marianne was up early again the next day, having had little asleep aside from her six hour nap. The previous night Daryl had told her he was going hunting and she invited herself along, digging her heels in when Daryl said she should wait at least another week. The sheer need to be out in the woods again by far outweighed any misgivings she had about hurting herself.

No one else stirred as Marianne gingerly stepped around sleeping bodies. She guessed that their full stomachs had contented them into a deep, restful sleep.

If only it was that easy for her. The image of Julia's dead body and then walker Jimmy came to the forefront. She pushed them back down, refusing to let her mind wander into darker territory and ruin the day for her.

Marianne went to her bag and grabbed a pair of jeans, a jacket, and her boots. She went into one of the bedrooms to change. After that she retrieved her bow and made sure all of her knives were in their rightful place. Lastly, she grabbed a granola bar that was allocated to her and Daryl last night. Splitting it in half gave them one maybe two bites of food and they might have been better off not eating anything at all since the granola bar might make them hungrier.

Because he had the last watch of the night, Daryl was already awake. She found him on the front porch, ready to leave.

"Morning," she said as she gently closed the front door.

"No 'good' morning?"

"What's so good about leaving a warm bed to come freeze my ass off outside for who knows how long?" Actually, Marianne was eager to hunt again and leaving a warm bed didn't bother her at all.

"There's still time to go back to bed."

"Nice try. Nothing's stoppin' me from goin'." Except for a herd of walkers. God forbid they should come across one. The group really needed a break from running while they had the chance. After they left, an opportunity to catch their breath might not come for awhile.

"That doesn't mean I have to like it." Daryl said with a frown but it looked like he had no intention of arguing with her to stay. "I'll go get Glenn up so we can leave." Glenn had graciously volunteered to get up early to finish the rest of Daryl's watch, citing that he'd rather have a good meal over an hour of sleep.

Daryl soon came back but it was a couple of minutes before Glenn appeared, stifling a yawn. Even with his cap on she could tell that he had bed head. His 'Good morning' was interrupted by another yawn.

"You sleep good?" Marianne asked.

"Definitely. It's great not going to bed hungry," Glenn said.

"Let's hope it happens tonight too," Marianne said.

"Come on, we gotta leave," Daryl said with impatience.

Marianne turned to Daryl. "We head east, right?"

"Southeast a bit and then east," Daryl said. Marianne nodded. They were heading away from the river and then roughly following its path and when they were done they'd circle back but closer to the river, possibly within sight of it.

"Good luck," Glenn said as the both of them began to walk away.

"Don't need it," Daryl said gruffly over his shoulder.

"Thank you Glenn," Marianne said pointedly, giving her brother a look.

Except for the occasional bird and gust of wind blowing through the trees, the forest was quiet. Marianne felt a calm wash over her that hadn't in a long time. This was as relaxed as she was capable of and she enjoyed every second of it.

Daryl and Marianne walked side by side about eight feet apart. Her eyes roamed around as they carefully made their way deeper into the woods, looking for any sign of potential prey.

The tree branches swayed a little in the wind that she wanted to go away because it made her colder but it only strengthened, making her wish she had some gloves on her but the ones they had were so thick they interfered with her drawing her bowstring.

No more than fifteen minutes later she heard a faint rustling close to the ground to her right. Marianne eyed the area where the sound came from. She spotted a brown rabbit and readied her arrow. Daryl looked in the direction she had pointed her arrow but didn't aim his crossbow which Marianne was grateful for. It showed that he still had confidence in her hunting abilities.

Marianne strained a little to pull her bowstring, her muscles weakened from disuse. She wondered if she could regain her strength with her paltry diet. This thought dampened the exhilaration she felt by being back on the hunt. She released the arrow and made the first kill of the day. At least her aim was still true.

Daryl retrieved the unlucky rabbit and if he had noticed the extra effort it had taken her, which she was sure he had, he didn't say anything about it.

"I'll carry it," he said while stringing up the rabbit.

"It's my kill. I'll carry it."

"You're tiny, it'll just get in the way," he said in an infuriating tone of finality. He'd never had a problem before with her carrying animals.

Marianne glared at him. She didn't feel like fighting right then. Maybe later. "Fine. Let's get goin'."

Roughly six hours passed with only one brief break when they each ate their half of the granola bar. They had caught almost enough squirrels to feed everyone but no more rabbits had appeared and most of the squirrels seemed to be driven into their nests by the cold.

All of a sudden both siblings stopped in their tracks.

"You see what I see?" Marianne asked.

Daryl nodded and without having to say anything, a plan formed. Both of them started walking again but more cautiously than before. They couldn't risk a single snap of a twig. Marianne was in the lead and Daryl close behind with his crossbow raised and ready to fire.

They stopped about twelve feet away from the tree line of an area where the forest was cleared and stared at a house. It was smaller than the one they were staying in but not by much. They had a full view of the back of the house and the backyard. There was a sturdy, wooden shed off to their left, not as big as the one they had at their house.

"What're you thinkin'?" Daryl asked.

"It looks deserted," Marianne said.

"We'll wait. See if anyone's around."

Marianne agreed so they moved closer and crouched down while still in the woods, obscured by the undergrowth, and watched for signs of life. About half an hour passed before either of them spoke.

"I don't think someone's livin' here," Marianne said.

"They could be out scavengin' or huntin' like us." Daryl stood up and Marianne copied him.

"But it feels empty." There were no signs of life and the place looked abandoned. Like most of the world, this house was dead.

"No offense, but we're not makin' a decision based on your feelings," Daryl said, glancing over at her and then back at the house.

"I wouldn't expect you to Daryl but we can't stand around here all day. We either go in or leave and I say we go in."

Daryl stared at the house. She could tell he was deep in thought, probably going over everything that could go wrong, everything that could go right, and weighing them against each other.

"Let's do it," he finally said.

Marianne gave him a look of approval and then hoped to herself that this wouldn't be a mistake. If it was, it'd be her fault.

The two of them quickly crossed the backyard because there wasn't any cover. Marianne soon discovered that the back door was locked.

"I guess it's the front then," she said.

"If that's locked, we'll check the windows."

They skirted around the house, staying close to the wall. Daryl walked sideways to keep an eye out on what was behind and to the side of them while Marianne focused on what was ahead of them.

Both of them stopped as they started to round the corner. There was an SUV in the driveway and they retreated. A car could mean people and people could mean trouble.

"I don't like this," Daryl said in a low voice. "Somethin' ain't right."

"What's that I hear? You feel something ain't right. Hmm, what was it that you said a couple of minutes ago?" Marianne asked, failing to hide a smirk.

"Fine. We'll go in," Daryl said, not looking particularly happy about it.

They went around the corner again, still hugging the wall. When they reached the front door, Marianne checked the handle.

"It's unlocked," she said right before knocking on the door. They waited but nothing came and they both took position. Marianne would open the door and Daryl would be the first one in, ready to defend them if needed.

Marianne swiftly opened the door and Daryl stepped into the doorway. She readied her bow and stood behind him. Daryl looked back and forth a few times.

"It's clear," he said. Daryl walked further into the house and Marianne followed. With the curtains open there was plenty of light to see by.

From the front room, where they were standing in the middle of, they could see straight through the dining room and into the kitchen. No doors separated the rooms. There was a large fireplace to their left and a closed door on either side. To their right was what appeared to be an L-shaped hallway and with a quick inspection they discovered all the doors there were also closed.

"Good, we don't have'ta deal with the other rooms. Just go straight to the kitchen and see what's there," Daryl said.

They walked into the dining room and her eyes were drawn to the giant chandelier hanging over the dining room table made out of antlers. She wondered if they were real and if they were, she hoped that the bucks hadn't been killed just for their antlers.

Marianne entered the kitchen first and then Daryl. There were three doors, one on the left wall close to the refrigerator, one on the other side of the room on the back wall which led outside, and another on the right wall.

Daryl placed the dead animals he was carrying on the island counter and Marianne placed the few squirrels Daryl had eventually let her carry on there too.

"I think that's the pantry." She pointed to the door on the left and that's the first one they headed to.

They did the same routine they had at the front door. Marianne opened the door while Daryl was ready for an attack.

Because it was obvious nothing and nobody was there, Marianne opened the door wider so she could look inside. "Holy shit."

The pantry was a walk-in with shelves that covered all three walls top to bottom. The shelves weren't completely full but there was enough food in front of her to make her breath hitch and her heart pound. A smile tugged at her lips and she looked at Daryl who was already looking at her. Although other people wouldn't see it, she could tell that he was happy.

"This is what? Enough to feed us two meals a day for three weeks, five if we stretch it," Marianne said.

"Sounds about right. We'll need to come back for it, bring a few more people."

Marianne nodded. "Search the cabinets and I'll do the closet."

"What makes you so sure it's a closet?"

"The same reason I knew that this was a pantry," Marianne said. Daryl snorted and Marianne raised an eyebrow at him.

"That was a serious answer?" He asked.

"Very serious." Her sincere tone was ruined by a smile and Daryl shook his head.

"Alright, just be careful."

"Can do," Marianne said. Daryl started opening cabinets and Marianne went to the other side of the room where the mystery door was. She knocked on it more out of habit then thinking she actually needed to do it. There was no bumping or thumping so she opened the door to be faced with an ordinary closet.

Jackets and raincoats crowded the space. She pushed them to the right and found a gun rack that could hold five hunting rifles but there was only one. She looked up and zeroed in on the shoebox on the shelf at the top of the closet, having to stand on her tiptoes to take it down. She opened the lid and as she had suspected, there were two boxes of ammo. One of the boxes was labeled .30-60 Springfield—bullets for the rifle— and the other was a box of 9mm bullets for a handgun. Marianne hadn't found one yet and wondered where it could be.

She set the shoebox on the ground and decided to search the bottom of the closet. At the front was a row of boots and rainboots but behind them was enough space to store additional things.

"Yes," she couldn't help but whisper when she spotted a compound bow on the floor behind the rainboots. It wasn't the greatest way to store a bow but when she picked it up she saw it was still in good shape. The bow had an attached quiver that could hold four arrows. After poking around a little more, she found six arrows in a separate quiver leaning upright in the back left corner of the closet.

"What do ya think?" Marianne had grabbed the rifle and bow and was showing them off to Daryl.

"Better than what I got."

"What'd you find?"

"Spices." Daryl said the word with contempt, making Marianne laugh.

"Well, it'll help morale."

"My morale don't need help."

She laughed again and Daryl unsuccessfully tried to look annoyed at her. "Of course it doesn't. But I'm sure everyone else will appreciate it."

Marianne continued her search. She had to jump to see the back of the shelf and her effort was rewarded. She found a hunting backpack that was designed to carry a bow and she put the newly found one in place. The backpack didn't carry a whole lot but they stuffed as much food as they could in it while leaving space for the two boxes of ammo.

The hunting rifle had a strap attached to it so Daryl slung it across his back. She put on the backpack before Daryl could get ahold of it.

"You sure that ain't too heavy?"

"What's with you lately? You're actin' like I can't do anything."

Instead of giving her a real answer, Daryl shrugged. Marianne let him get away with it for now but if he kept treating her like this she'd have to have a talk with him.

She began to reach for the squirrels she had been carrying but Daryl grabbed them and Marianne huffed after he flashed a smirk her way.

Before they left, Marianne gathered two long pieces of grass. They unlocked the back door, opened it, and when they closed it they made it so one of the pieces of grass was stuck in the closed door. If the grass was gone or had fallen to the ground they'd know that someone had opened the door. They locked the back door and did the same for the front. They didn't find the keys so they had to leave that door unlocked.

After that, they checked the shed. It contained a generator and full gas containers. A generator meant central heating and working appliances. No more huddling around the fireplace or cooking over a fire.

"You think we could move here?" Marianne asked.

"Nah, we don't know where that road goes and it'll take too much gas drivin' around tryin' to find a way here."

That was the answer she had expected. "Yeah, I figured and walkin' it is out of the question. It's too risky and we don't have a local map."

It wasn't the outcome she wanted but at least they had found more food and weapons.

Hours and a few more squirrels later they arrived back at the house which they came up to from behind. No one was currently in the backyard and whoever was on watch was on the front porch. The back door was locked so they had to knock. Marianne saw the curtain of the window to her left twitch a little before she heard the lock click.

The door opened and Rick was standing in front of them. Marianne's face settled into a look of displeasure. Rick quickly looked over them both, taking in the dead animals approvingly and then he noticed the rifle Daryl was carrying and the backpack Marianne was wearing. She could practically see the questions running through his head.

"Good to have you back." Rick nodded at them. Daryl shrugged a shoulder and Marianne didn't respond at all. "It looks like we have something to talk about."

Daryl nodded and opened his mouth to speak but Marianne beat him to it. "We need to start on dinner. These squirrels won't gut themselves."

The annoyance that crossed Rick's face gave her some satisfaction. She knew the rabbit and squirrels could wait long enough to give Rick a quick summary of what they found but making him wait was so much more fun.

"I think it's time I learned how to gut them myself. You can talk while I get the hang of it," Rick said. Marianne looked at him critically. This time she was the one that was annoyed but she could still grudgingly appreciate his maneuver.

A few minutes later the three of them were standing at the table where Daryl and T-Dog had prepared the fish. Daryl stood in the middle with Marianne to his right and Rick to his left.

By the time Daryl had finished showing Rick the finer points of skinning and gutting a squirrel, Marianne had already finished the rabbit and was pulling the skin off of one of their bigger squirrels. Marianne had tossed the smallest one at Rick for him to practice on. If he botched it, the least amount of meat would be ruined.

Daryl told Rick about the house. Rick asked questions that only Daryl answered.

"We need more than me and Marianne to go back for the rest."

Rick sliced open his second squirrel. "We can do that tomorrow. The sooner, the better."

After dinner Rick called a group meeting about the house and it was decided that Marianne, Daryl, T-Dog, Glenn, and Maggie would go to the house for the food.

Marianne could tell Rick wasn't happy about staying behind but it was argued that he always went on supply runs so it was time for him to sit one out. She was completely fine with it, having not looked forward to hours on end of being unable to avoid him.

---

It was another fitful night where the hours seemed to drag on. Marianne knew she dozed a little because one second the fire in the fireplace was going strong and the next it had died down with only a few weak flames left. Whoever was on watch had forgotten to add more wood to keep it alive.

She extricated herself from the middle of the sleeping group. Glenn stirred a little as she stepped over him and she had to walk around everyone to get to the fireplace where she carefully added wood so as not to wake anyone. She watched the fire grow and satisfied that it wouldn't burn out, Marianne went to her things, pulled on her boots and put on her jacket. Marianne made sure her knives were in place before she headed outside, taking her bow with her as an added precaution.

She found T-Dog on the front porch looking bored but diligently watching for any sign of trouble. Looking surprised, he had turned towards her when he heard the door open.

T-Dog looked at the wristwatch they passed around so whoever was on watch would know when their shift was over. "You're up early."

"Couldn't get back to sleep. The fire was dyin'. I put some wood on and since I was already up I thought you'd want some company."

T-Dog grimaced. "I knew I forgot something."

Marianne stood next to him. "You'll remember next time."

A silence stretched between them. Marianne didn't have a clue about what to say. They were practically around each other 24/7 so it wasn't like they didn't know what the other had been doing.

"What's it like out there?" T-Dog gestured towards the woods.

Marianne thought about it for a few seconds. She didn't want to describe what it was like for her, what it meant. It was too personal. "Quiet."

T-Dog stifled a chuckle. "Glenn's right. You're terrible at answering questions."

"I'm not Google."

T-Dog looked taken aback and tried to hide it but Marianne caught on.

"Just because I didn't own a computer doesn't mean I don't know how to use one. I wasn't livin' under a rock."

"Sorry." T-Dog looked a little sheepish. "I just never thought about you and Daryl like that. You two seemed..." He was at a loss for words.

"Clueless?" Marianne finished for him. T-Dog looked distressed, like he had dug himself into a hole and didn't know how to get out.

"No. Not that. You—"

"To be fair, Daryl is clueless. He never saw the point in it. Never needed it."

The door opened and the two of them turned to see who it was. Glenn was standing there, immensely relieved. It looked like he had just rolled out of bed. He didn't even have shoes on.

"Oh, thank God," Glenn said.

"What's wrong?" Marianne and T-Dog asked at the same time.

"You were gone," Glenn said to Marianne. "I thought you were...you know."

She was grateful it was still dark enough that the two men couldn't see her face flush. She was rarely embarrassed and she felt guilty for scaring Glenn. "I couldn't sleep."

Glenn nodded. "I'm glad you're okay."

Marianne's heart twisted a little. She was still struggling to get used to people caring about her. It was hard to stop being wary and open herself up. She didn't see this ending anytime soon. "You have a couple of hours. Maybe you can get back to sleep?"

"I don't know but it's worth a try."

Glenn ended up falling back asleep and even slept in a little with the help of Marianne, who stopped several people from waking him up. Glenn's extra sleep didn't delay their trip. Everyone was ready at the time Daryl had appointed.

All of them had backpacks on. Glenn, Maggie, and T-Dog each had a bag hanging from one of their shoulders. T-Dog and Glenn were carrying small duffels in their left hands. Without a second or third bag, Marianne and Daryl were left unencumbered to use their bow and crossbow.

This trip through the forest was less peaceful than yesterday. There were more people to worry about and look out for. They were less inconspicuous than when it was just her and Daryl. Along with walkers and strangers, Marianne kept a look out for squirrels and rabbits but the group was making enough noise to warn them away.

Because hunting wasn't their purpose, they got to the house in half the time Daryl and Marianne had the previous day.

Daryl was in the lead and Marianne took the rear. He stopped them all at the tree line. Everything appeared to be as they had left it. Even so, Daryl and Marianne examined the scene in front of them thoroughly before they both agreed it was safe to proceed and they crossed the backyard.

"Wait a second," Daryl said. He checked if the backdoor was still locked and looked for the piece of grass they had shut in it. "It's there," he said to Marianne.

"What's there?" Glenn asked

"Our security system," Marianne said which, from the look on Glenn's face, was too vague of an answer for him.

The five of them continued around the house and reached the front door. Marianne checked if the other piece of grass was still there and it was.

"We should be good," Marianne said.

They were still cautious. T-Dog, Glenn, and Maggie stood back a little. Glenn was turned away from them so he could keep watch. Marianne opened the door and Daryl went in first.

"It's clear," he said.

He went further into the house and the rest of them followed, T-Dog shutting the door behind them. Marianne heard the lock click and turned around.

T-Dog shrugged. "It couldn't hurt, right?"

"Just remember it's locked in case we need to make a run for it," Marianne said.

They all went into the kitchen and put their bags on the counters. It was time to get down to business.

"Glenn, Maggie. You're with me. We'll take the hallway," Marianne said.

Daryl nodded. "Me and T-Dog'll start with those two doors and then join you."

"No, you should start packin'. We want'ta get back as soon as we can." Marianne wondered if Daryl would be stubborn and refuse.

For a few seconds, it looked like he would disagree. "Alright."

"Sounds like a plan," Maggie said.

"Yeah, sounds good," Glenn added

"Let's do this," T-Dog said, prompting them to get moving.

Marianne grabbed one of the small duffel bags for any toiletries and, hopefully, medical supplies they found.

In the first stretch of the hallway was two doors to their left. The first door was to a small bathroom where they took a small first aid kit, a bottle of shampoo, a tube of toothpaste, and two rolls of toilet paper. The second led to a boy's room where there was nothing of note except a small stack of comic books Marianne placed flat at the bottom of the duffel because Carl might like them.

Immediately turning around the corner, there was a door to their right and two more after it. At the very end of the hallway was a fourth door.

It was Marianne's turn to enter the room first. She stood to the side of the door with Maggie next to her placing a hand on the door handle. Marianne tensed at a smell she hadn't noticed before, the smell of something rotten.

"You smell that?" Marianne asked.

"Yeah, you think one's in there?" Maggie asked.

"Only one way to find out." Marianne knocked on the door but no noise answered. She nodded her head at Maggie who quickly opened the door. Marianne stepped in with a knife raised but there weren't any walkers. There was a king size bed opposite the door with a window on either side of it. A closet door was to her left and next to it was what she assumed was a bathroom door. There was a dresser and an armchair. It was an ordinary bedroom. All except for the four dead people.

Maggie stepped up behind her and made a little gasp.

"What is it?" Glenn asked. Marianne went further into the room so Glenn could see. He didn't make a sound.

There was a woman lying in the middle of the bed, in between a young boy and a teenage girl. A man was slumped in the armchair that had blood splattered on the wall behind it. All of them had been shot in the head.

The man's right arm was hanging over an armrest with the handgun that Marianne had failed to find yesterday on the carpet below it. It was a sobering sight and, for a minute, the trio stood in silence.

"They didn't even try," she said with disapproval. Marianne was getting angry that she was mad at these strangers.

"You don't know that. Maybe they did," Glenn said.

"They have a generator, gas, food, weapons." She shook her head. "They didn't give themselves a chance."

It wasn't like she hadn't thought about her death many times, it just never occurred to her that dying by her own hand because she had given up was an option. So many people were fighting tooth and nail for their lives and they had thrown theirs away.

She tried to look at it from their perspective but couldn't wrap her mind around it. Life had always been hard but now it was hard for different reasons. Maybe some people who had it easier than her couldn't face the new reality. Their will to survive was never tested and when it had been, it was found lacking.

"We don't know their story," Maggie said.

"No, we don't." But Marianne knew that they had given up like that CDC doctor who tried to blow them up and 'save' them from the walkers. That felt like it had happened years ago and she couldn't even remember his name anymore but why should she? He meant nothing to her. Like these people. Absolutely nothing. But then why had she reacted this way? Marianne bit her bottom lip and took a deep breath, which she instantly regretted because the smell of decaying bodies was strong. Marianne grabbed the gun off of the floor. "Come on. Let's get this over with."

They hit the jackpot in the bathroom. The medicine cabinet was actually filled with medicine. The cabinet under the sink had more toilet paper and tampons. The duffel bag was nearly full when they moved on.

The three of them made quick work of the remaining rooms. The next door was a linen closet and the one after that was a teenage girl's bedroom where Marianne grabbed all of the hair ties since they always seemed to be losing or breaking them. The door at the end was what looked to be a guest bedroom with an attached bathroom, which had nothing in it.

Finished with all of the rooms, they went back to the kitchen to find that T-Dog and Daryl had just finished packing all of the backpacks.

"How's it goin'?" Marianne asked. Daryl, who was in the pantry, grunted.

"It's like Tetris, tryin' to get everything to fit," T-Dog said with a grin that went away when he looked over at Glenn, Maggie, and Marianne. "What happened?"

T-Dog's question instantly pulled Daryl out of the pantry to look at Marianne. If T-Dog could see that something was wrong than Daryl definitely would. Maggie, Glenn, and Marianne looked at each other and none of them spoke.

"Marianne?" Daryl asked.

She sighed. "We found the people that lived here."

"Were they walkers?" T-Dog asked. "We didn't hear anything."

"No. They're dead dead," Glenn said.

"It was a murder-suicide," Maggie added somberly. "A mother, a father, and two kids."

"Head shots." Marianne grabbed the handgun from the back of her pants. "I found it."

She didn't like how intently Daryl was looking at her so she went to what she thought was the right cabinet and opened it. She looked at the shelves and estimated there was enough room in the small duffel bag for the spices. If it wasn't for their gruesome discovery, Marianne would've smiled at the sight of them.

The five of them made quick work packing up the rest of the food. Everything didn't fit perfectly but at least it all fit.

It was decided that Daryl and Marianne would each take one of the small duffels that T-Dog and Glenn had carried there. She was adjusting the strap and about to start following the rest of them out of the house when Daryl held her back until the others were out of earshot.

"You okay?" He asked.

"I've seen worse." She had lived through worse.

"Marianne."

"I'm fine." She shrugged off Daryl and moved to catch up with Maggie, Glenn, and T-Dog.

The trip back was unremarkable and according to the watch T-Dog was wearing it was 3:37 PM when they returned. Marianne was tired and hungry and she could tell the others were too.

She was disappointed but not surprised that lunch wasn't waiting for them. The group was sticking to their normal routine of two meals a day and she'd have to hold out until dinner.

The five of them dumped the bags in the dining room for Beth, Carol, and Hershel to sort through. Relieved of their burden, T-Dog went to take over watch for Rick, and Glenn and Maggie sat on the back porch together. Despite the already long day Daryl started chopping more firewood and Marianne went down to the river for more water.

After filling the two containers she brought with her Marianne stayed be the river for awhile, watching the water rush past her and holding herself back from sticking her feet in the cold river. The temporary solitude felt good but only because she knew it was temporary.

She didn't stay long because she didn't want to worry the others, more specifically Daryl. When the back of the house came into view she saw that Glenn was gone and Carl was sitting on the porch floor reading a comic book.

Marianne didn't know why Maggie was still outside with Glenn gone, knowing the two only withstood the cold to have a little bit of privacy, and she was surprised that Lori had let Carl read outside.

Maggie spotted her, got off the porch and walked towards Marianne.

"Here, let me help." Maggie reached for one of the containers and Marianne let her take it. "I feel kinda guilty. You go off to get water while I sit on the porch. Glenn did too and now he's helpin' Daryl."

Marianne shrugged. "You're not used to walkin' around the woods for hours on end. You needed a break."

Maggie smiled and shook her head. "You don't have to make excuses for me. You need a break just as much as I do."

The two women went up the porch steps and set the containers next to the back door. Both of them sat on the porch swing. Marianne sat crossed legged while Maggie tucked one leg underneath her and let the other hang so her foot touched the floor, letting her to gently swing them.

Marianne gave a cursory glance when Lori came outside and told Carl it was time to go back inside.

"Maggie, I've been thinkin'. Since we've got an extra bow, maybe you'd like to learn how to shoot?"

Maggie looked at her in such a way that Marianne was regretting she had asked.

"When can we start?" Maggie asked enthusiastically.

Marianne gave her a half smile. "Tomorrow afternoon, after me and Daryl get back from fishing."

"I want to go fishing," Carl said. Marianne looked over at the boy, who had obviously been eavesdropping. His eyes were lit up at the prospect and eagerness filled his voice. It occurred then to Marianne that it must be pretty dull stuck at the house all the time with only chores, cards, and board games to keep him occupied. At least the comic books would help a little.

Marianne glanced at Lori to gauge the woman's reaction. She looked disagreeable to the idea but Marianne didn't see why Carl couldn't go. Between her and Daryl, he'd be safe.

"Sure. But you're gonna have to ask your Mom or Dad," Marianne told Carl, glancing back over at Lori. The boy looked a little crestfallen, probably already knowing what Lori would say. Instead of turning to his mom, Carl headed inside where he could find Rick.

Marianne didn't look at Lori to see how she reacted to Carl's choice of going to Rick instead of her. She didn't want to be involved in the Grimes' messed up family dynamic and despite how much she didn't dislike Lori, Marianne didn't want to be her confidant. It'd only make her uncomfortable and she wouldn't be good at it.

Maggie and Marianne followed Lori into the house. Maggie went to the dining room and Marianne grabbed one of her shirts and her small sewing kit. She settled down on an armchair next to the fire.

Rick and Carl came into the living room. Rick looked around. Maggie and Beth were in the dining room organizing their new food. Carol was cooking and Marianne was sewing a button back onto her shirt. Marianne knew he wouldn't want to have a conversation that would most likely turn into an argument in front of other people and she was right. Rick led Lori and Carl to the den.

Carl hadn't completely closed the door and from where Marianne was sitting and Carol's place by the fire, both of them were able to hear what Rick and Lori were saying. The two women looked at each other and neither of them moved. Carol had a better excuse since she couldn't leave the soup or it would burn. Marianne's feeble excuse was that she didn't want to give up the warmth of the fire for the sake of Rick and Lori's privacy.

"I don't want Carl going out there," Lori said.

"Lori, it's not like he'll be goin' by himself." Rick's voice had a hint of exasperation.

"I don't care." Lori sounded determined. "I know there haven't been walkers yet but you know how fast that can change. Think about the farm."

"Mom, please. It's not that far away," Carl said, his voice almost matching Rick's.

"Carl, honey, it's not safe."

"But almost everyone else got to leave." Marianne thought Carl was speaking to his mom with a little too much attitude.

"That's different and you aren't 'everyone else'," Lori said.

"Lori, I trust Daryl and Marianne with my life and I trust them to keep him safe."

Startled, Marianne looked over at Carol to see how she had reacted to what they just heard. Carol was already looking at her with a small smile on her face. Marianne turned her head away so Carol couldn't get a good look at it.

Rick continued. "Marianne cares about Carl and I think Daryl does too."

Silence came from the room and Marianne could practically feel Lori thinking. She wondered if Lori was as surprised as she was by what Rick had said about Marianne.

There was more talking but Marianne didn't hear what they were saying. She stared at the button she hadn't finished sewing on with unfocused eyes. All of her attention had moved inward as she tried to process Rick's words. How could he say that he trusted her with his life? All she had done since she had reunited with the group was hate him and before that, on the farm, they hadn't really gotten along.

Did she trust Rick with her life? Marianne was confused and she didn't like the feeling.

Carl bounded over to her and interrupted her knotted up thoughts. She hadn't noticed the Grimes leaving the den or heard the end of their conversation. From the look on Carl's face, Lori had relented.

"I can go!" Carl had a big grin that Marianne might have returned if she wasn't still occupied with what Rick had said. She gave a nod instead.

"Glad you can come." She truly was but wasn't sure Daryl would be. He still didn't know that Carl had asked. "You need'ta go to bed early. We'll be up before dawn."

Carl wholeheartedly agreed but it didn't work out that way.

The next morning Marianne was almost finished getting ready when she decided it was time for Carl to get out of bed. She wondered if she should get Lori up to so she could see Carl off. The worried mother had asked her last night why they couldn't go down to the river where they collected their water since it was closer to the house and she answered that the fishing was better where they planned to go.

"It's time to get up," she whispered close to his head, gently shaking his shoulder. Carl groaned.

"Hush, you'll wake 'em all up."

He sat up, his hair sticking up every which way. Lori hadn't cut it recently and it was getting longer. Carl was slow to get going but once he was fully awake he was rushing to leave.

Last night, Daryl wasn't thrilled when she told him Carl was joining them. "We ain't babysitters," he had said. This morning he looked only slightly grumpy at the prospect.

"Turn that frown upside down," she said to Daryl, who looked at her like she was crazy. Since they were outside she didn't hold back her laugh.

"It's too early for that," Daryl grumbled.

"It's never too early to mess with you."

Daryl scoffed. "Whatever." Marianne could tell he wasn't as upset as he was letting on. "Payback's a bitch."

"I'll keep an eye out for her."

In a couple of minutes the trio was ready, having retrieved everything they needed from the shed. They followed the path down to the river that Marianne and Daryl had discovered and used the other day.

Carl was carrying his own pair of waders that was too big for him and a fishing pole taller than him. Had had refused to take one of the fishing poles made for kids. Marianne and Daryl carried everything else.

They hadn't walked very far when Marianne noticed Daryl was itching to go faster. "Hey, you can go on without us."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. Here." They set the cooler down, which they had been carrying between them, and Marianne handed over her waders and fishing pole to Daryl so she could carry the cooler by herself.

"Same place, right?" Marianne asked and Daryl nodded. "We'll meet you there."

Daryl took off at a faster pace and soon disappeared around a bend in the path. Marianne glanced at Carl and saw that he looked a little disappointed. She had noticed before that, despite Daryl's gruff appearance, Carl was fascinated with her brother. It seemed like fishing wasn't the only thing the boy had been looking forward to. Marianne didn't know what to say so she kept silent.

"Do you like it here?" Carl asked.

"It's nice enough." Marianne wondered where Carl was going with this conversation.

"How long are we gonna stay here?"

"As long as we can." Which, if Rick got his way, would only be a few more days.

"Why can't we stay here forever?"

Marianne readjusted the cooler in her hands. "It's not safe enough. There's no fences and no way we can defend this place."

"That's what my Dad told me," Carl said and Marianne frowned. "You don't like him."

"That's the understatement of the year," Marianne said. She probably shouldn't be talking about Rick like this in front of Carl. Whatever Rick was to her, he was a decent father to him, and, for Carl, she didn't want him to have a bad relationship with his dad. "You're lucky. Your Dad is a million times better than mine was. He actually loves you so you gotta try to be nice to him."

"You're not nice to him."

"He's not my Dad."

Carl didn't respond and she assumed the conversation was over.

"I don't like my Mom right now."

Marianne winced. She wasn't a therapist, let alone one for a kid. This was a serious topic and she could royally screw this up. "Why not?"

Carl shrugged. "I don't know."

She grappled with her mind for something to say. Anything that wouldn't make this worse. "Grown-ups make mistakes. Your mom is already payin' for hers so she doesn't need you punishin' her."

Once again, she thought the conversation was over but Carl wasn't finished.

He kicked a rock on the ground as they walked. It rolled a few feet in from of him and he kicked it again. "She treats me like a kid."

"In case you haven't noticed, let me tell you. You are a kid."

"I can take care of myself," he said defensively.

Marianne stopped walking and then Carl did, ending up a few feet in front of her. He turned around to face her. "But you can't Carl. Not yet. You understand?" Carl stared at his shoes and didn't answer. "Look at me. This is serious. You understand? Say it."

"I understand."

"You tellin' the truth?" Carl nodded. "Good. And don't you forget it." Marianne started walking again. "Now perk up. We're gonna catch some fish."

When the two of them reached the fishing spot, Daryl had already cast his line. Marianne showed Carl how to and soon all of them were waiting for a bite.

After a scan of the forest across the river Marianne looked at Carl who kept glancing at Daryl. She knew Carl wanted to talk to Daryl and her brother was oblivious. Marianne was about to speak when there was an unexpectedly strong tug on her pole and the surprise almost made her stumble forward.

"You get somethin'?" Daryl asked.

"Yeah, but I don't think it's a fish."

It was a struggle to reel in. Whatever was caught on her hook was big. Daryl watched with a furrowed brow, looking between her and her line. Carl had lost focus on his pole too and stared expectantly for Marianne's catch to reveal itself.

Marianne's confusion turned into suspicion. Soon, the outline of the thing attached to her hook came into view.

"Is that a log?" Carl asked.

"Carl, get outta the water. Now," Marianne said. She looked over at Daryl and it looked like he too had realized what it was.

"What is—"

"I said now!"

Daryl dropped his pole and moved to pull Carl out of the water because the boy seemed stuck in place, mesmerized by the walker on Marianne's hook.

With Carl safely on dry land, she kept reeling it in, intent on killing it. For some reason, she couldn't let it continue its course down the river. She wanted at least one place where the horror of the walking dead was absent.

The walker was coming feet first towards her. When it got close enough she saw that her hook had caught the back of its pants. Marianne dropped her pole, grabbed the walker, and pulled it halfway out of the water. It violently thrashed making splashes big enough to get her shirt wet. The walker was floating on its stomach and trying to turn around to grab her. She pinned its right arm with her foot, crouched down, and stabbed its head. The walker went limp.

Marianne stood up and looked at the river, finding that her effort was futile. At least a dozen more walkers were floating past them and who knew how many more were stuck in the current underwater.

Marianne stepped out of the river. Daryl and Carl had already taken off their waders and put their boots back on. Marianne copied them as fast as she could.

"There's gotta be more on land and they could be close," Daryl said.

Marianne nodded and quickened her pace. "I think it's time to leave."

Daryl ran ahead to alert the group as soon as possible. Marianne wanted to run too but walked at a speed that Carl could keep up with. She knew that in certain aspects he was mature for his age, but he was still just a kid and she didn't want to unduly worry or panic him. This wouldn't be like the farm.

The group was already packing when the two of them reached the house. Lori was waiting outside for them and when she saw Carl she engulfed him in a hug that the boy protested against. Marianne saw the hurt in Lori's face when Carl pushed her away.

She felt bad for Lori and, apparently, their talk earlier had done little to affect his behavior. "Carl, let's go inside and make sure we don't leave your cards behind."

Marianne avoided looking at Lori as she shepherded Carl into the house, giving the other woman some privacy to compose herself.

The group packed within the hour and after a quick consultation with the map, they were off.

---

A few days later they found a relatively isolated three-story hotel. It had grimy off white walls and faded blue trim. The second and third floors had balconies where the railings' green paint was peeling.

Everyone parked haphazardly, completely ignoring the lines of the parking spots. They got out of their cars and stood close together, all facing and checking out the hotel. Marianne looked warily at the four other cars in the parking lot that didn't belong to them.

Rick pointed at them. "We can check those for gas."

"You think there's people in there or just walkers?" Carol asked no one in particular.

"No one's shooting at us so that's a good sign," Marianne said.

"Let's check the doors," Rick said.

The front door and the emergency exits were locked and so was the service door in the back. Breaking one wasn't an option since they wanted the protection of a locked door between them and the world.

"What are we going to do now?" Lori asked with a worried face and a hand on her stomach.

"We'll figure something out," Rick assured everyone. Marianne noticed he hadn't looked at Lori and she saw that Lori had noticed it too and she was trying to mask the hurt on her face.

"We can check the balconies," Glenn said. "I can do it."

Maggie didn't look happy about Glenn's volunteering and some of the group looked skeptical about the idea. Rick didn't. He examined the building, nodding his head. The familiar look of resolve showed on his face.

"He can stand on one of the cars," Rick said.

"I'll do it too. We can split the balconies between me and Glenn," Marianne said.

"Nah, I'll do it." Daryl said.

Marianne narrowed her eyes at him. "No way. I volunteered first."

"Hold on. We haven't even established if two people are goin' to do it," Rick said.

"It'll take forever if it's just Glenn and then we still have the whole place to clear. Don't you want to be settled in before dark?" Marianne looked at everyone except Rick.

"I don't like it, but she's right. And if we can't get in, we'll have to find another place and risk spending the night outside," Hershel said.

"Alright, let's do it," Rick said.

Marianne turned to Daryl and recognized the look on his face. "If you ask me if I'm sure, I will steal your vest and hide it."

"Then what about your stomach?" Daryl asked instead, not missing a beat.

Marianne pursed her lips and crossed her arms. "I'm sayin' this for the last time. It's healed. You don't believe me? I'll show you."

She unzipped her jacket and pulled up the two shirts she was wearing to prove that her injury was gone. Small patches of skin were still pink and there was some scarring that Hershel said should fade with time but no one could deny that she was fit to climb onto the balconies.

Marianne would use the tallest vehicle, the truck, because she was shorter than Glenn by seven inches, who would use the hatchback to stand on.

Daryl and Hershel went with Marianne to the back of the hotel while everyone else stayed in the front. Hershel drove the truck into place under the first balcony and left the truck as Marianne climbed on top of it.

She had to make a little hop to grab onto the top of the railing. Marianne pulled herself up, withholding a grunt, and her feet made purchase on the edge of the balcony that stuck out past the railing. From there it was even easier. She swung one leg over the railing and then the other.

"See, easy," Marianne called down to Daryl and Hershel.

Marianne walked to the door and pulled on the handle. It wouldn't budge.

She repeated the same thing three more times and by the fifth balcony she was losing hope that one of the doors would be unlocked.

Marianne tugged on the handle of the sliding glass door and found no resistance. Silently thanking whoever was careless enough to leave it unlocked, she closed it again in case there were walkers inside.

"Of course it's the last one," Marianne said to herself. "It's open," she called down to Daryl and Hershel. "I guess you can tell Glenn he can stop."

"I'll tell everyone. They'll be happy to hear it," Hershel said.

She leaned over the railing and looked down at the two men. "I'm goin' in."

"Be careful," Daryl said.

"Always."

Marianne turned her attention to the door. She banged on it but nothing responded. With a knife in her right hand, a flashlight in her left, and her Ruger ready to be drawn she slid open the door and pushed part of the curtains aside.

The flashlight beam swept across the room to reveal that it was empty of walkers and people. She entered and went straight to the other door.

From what she saw of the outside of the building, Marianne concluded there would be no windows to let light into the hallway.

Marianne quickly opened the door and then looked left and right with her flashlight, which revealed that she was alone. So far, so good.

As she walked to the closest stairwell she noticed the type of locks on the doors. It was a stroke of the luck that the hotel still used actual keys instead of key cards, which she wasn't sure would work without electricity.

She entered the stairwell, which she had correctly guessed also had no windows, and had no problems reaching the first floor. She exited the stairwell and found herself at the end of the first-floor hallway, which had the same worn, dark blue carpet and cream colored walls as the second floor.

There were four rooms on one side and three on the other which she all ignored as she walked towards the lobby. When she reached it, she turned off her flashlight because the windows let in enough light to see by.

The lobby had a white tiled floor and blue walls. There was a small seating area with a dead potted plant. The concierge desk was directly across the front doors and had a closed white door behind the desk, which had a short hallway to the right of it. That hallway had two more closed doors and a vending machine. To the right of the hallway was an elevator and on the left-hand wall was the door to a second stairwell.

She went behind the concierge desk and discovered it had numerous drawers, some of them with locks. The second drawer she opened had three key rings. Two small ones with only three keys each and a bigger one with eight. Marianne took them all, keeping the one with the eight keys out and stuffing the other two in her jacket pocket.

Marianne found Daryl, Glenn, T-Dog, and Rick standing directly in front of the door outside. They looked relieved to see her and she held up the keys so they could see them before getting to work figuring out which one unlocked the front door.

The fifth key she tried fit inside the lock and turned perfectly.

She barely had enough time to avoid being hit by the doors when the men opened them.

"Whoa. What the hell guys? What's the rush?" Her mind briefly went to walkers but if that were the case either everyone would be coming into the building or Daryl would be dragging her to her truck.

Glenn and T-Dog apologized.

"What took you so long?" Daryl asked.

Marianne tilted her head and raised her eyebrows at him. "First of all, it was barely ten minutes and second, I was being careful like you told me to, Mr. Worrywart."

Daryl huffed at the name but stood down. The three other men had trouble holding back a smile at what she had just called Daryl, who didn't notice because his back was to them.

"Okay, we want to take a quick look around before we make a plan," Rick said. This was exactly what the four men did while Marianne went outside.

She walked to the cars, where everyone else was congregated. Lori was still sitting in the Chevy while Carol and Hershel talked to her. Marianne went to the Chevy's hood, which Carl and Beth were sitting on and Maggie was standing beside.

"Somethin' wrong with Lori?" Marianne asked.

Maggie shook her head. "Nothin' serious. Just normal pregnancy stuff."

Glenn, T-Dog, Daryl and Rick came out of the building and crowded around the Chevy.

"You got the keys?" Rick asked Marianne.

She dug the two key rings out of her pocket and placed it with the one she still had in her hand on the hood of the Chevy, which Carl and Beth slid off of.

"We gotta figure out what goes to what," T-Dog said.

As the others continued to talk, Marianne picked up one of the smaller rings and studied the keys. Marianne singled out a key and then looked for the same one on the other rings.

"This one's the master key," Marianne interrupted, holding up one of keys attached to the bigger ring. Everyone looked at her and then it.

"How do you know?" Beth asked curiously, before anyone else could.

This was now the second time Merle's lesson on lock picking had come in handy. Daryl would have figured it out too if he hadn't been standing back with his arms crossed. "The cuts are shaved down. The other two rings have the same one, so we can clear the floors at the same time."

"That solves the problem of having to find the room keys," Glenn said.

Out of the corner of her eye Marianne could see Rick looking at her.

"Yeah, it does," Rick said. "Daryl and I will take the first floor, Glenn and Maggie the second, and Marianne and T-Dog the third."

"I wanna help," Carl said with purpose.

"Absolutely not," Lori said as she shook her head. At some point, she had left the Chevy and stood behind Carl.

"Me and T-Dog can take him. I ta-" I taught Jimmy. "We can teach him. It won't be a problem. He'll be safe with us."

Lori frowned at her and then looked at Rick. For a few seconds, it looked like they were having a conversation with just their eyes.

"He needs to learn eventually," Rick said.

"We don't know what's in there. It's too dangerous," Lori shot back.

There was a short argument and once again Lori was overruled and reluctantly agreed to let Carl do something she didn't want him doing.

Marianne was getting flashlights out of her truck when Lori came up to her.

"You need to stop," Lori said in a heated whisper.

Marianne looked at her in complete confusion, wondering if Lori had gone crazy. "Stop what?"

"Trying to raise my son."

"What?" Marianne would have laughed if she hadn't sensed how serious Lori was.

"You knew I wouldn't want him to go fishing but you said he could anyways. Now your bringing him, a little boy, with you to teach him how to kill."

"Walkers. Kill walkers. So they won't kill him. Don't you want that?"

"I want him to have a childhood. Between you and Rick—"

Marianne scowled. "Hey. If you have problem with Rick, you should go talk to him instead of getting on my ass. It's not my fault you barely speak to each other. I didn't make that mess."

The two women glared at each other but Lori backed down and stormed away.

"What the fuck?" Marianne said under her breath as she went back to finding the flashlights.

Marianne's group and the duo, Glenn and Maggie, decided to each take a stairwell to clear.

Because there would be no windows, T-Dog and Carl turned on their flashlights. T-Dog opened the door to their stairwell, the one Marianne hadn't used earlier, and they were immediately met with the stink of a walker that started growling when it spotted them.

They shined their lights on the walker. The man it once was had hung himself. Its effort of reaching out to them made it swing.

"I got it." Marianne shot it in the head with an arrow.

She waited with Carl while T-Dog went upstairs and cut the rope. The dead walker fell to the ground with an unpleasant crunch and Marianne retrieved her arrow, wiping most of the gore off on the walker's shirt.

The three of them walked up to the second floor and T-Dog and Marianne checked behind the space under the stairs blocked by an ice machine before leaving Carl there while they checked the stairs leading to the third floor.

T-Dog and Marianne called Carl to come up.

"You ready?" She asked Carl when he reached them.

"I'm ready."

Carl opened the door and T-Dog went in first, Carl second, and Marianne last. There were ten rooms, five on each side of the hallway, and they chose the right side first. Everything went smoothly. There weren't any walkers to kill but Marianne and T-Dog gave Carl pointers on how to clear a room.

Marianne pushed back memories of her and Jimmy. She couldn't be distracted right now.

At the middle door on the left side, something answered when they knocked. T-Dog and Marianne looked one another and then at Carl, who looked disturbingly excited.

"Okay, so I guess you'll get a lesson on walker killing," Marianne said.

Before they opened the door, Marianne and T-Dog went over different scenarios, like what to do when you're alone and what to do if there's more than one walker. After all that, it was time to specifically tell him how to kill walkers.

"Since you're short, you wanna kick their leg, make 'em fall. Try to get behind them if you can and then kill it, but only if you absolutely can," Marianne said and Carl nodded.

T-Dog told Carl to stand back as he and Marianne got into position. The walker was still scratching at the door and so far, it only sounded like there was one of them.

With her knife in hand, Marianne waited for T-Dog to open the door. He looked at her for confirmation and she nodded. The door opened and Marianne anticipated the walker's moves. She only let it stumble halfway out of the room before knocking it down onto its stomach.

Marianne pushed her boot into its back to keep it laying prone on the floor. "Now kill it," she told Carl.

"Really?" Carl sounded like he couldn't believe it.

"Yeah, you need to get a feel for it."

Carl took the knife from the sheath on his belt. He stared at the walker so long she thought he wasn't going to do it but then he bent down and stabbed the side of the walker's head. The knife didn't go all the way through the skull. "That's okay. Try again and use more force."

Carl nodded, his brow set in determination. He raised the knife again and brought it down hard. This time it passed completely through the skull and pierced the walker's brain.

"Good. You'll have to be faster but we can work on that." Marianne didn't know when that would be. Hell, she was sure Rick and Lori would be mad at her for letting him do this much. "Let's keep this particular lesson between the three of us." Marianne looked at Carl and the T-Dog, her eyebrows raised.

"Fine with me," T-Dog said.

"I won't tell," Carl promised.

The trio finished the remaining rooms and found no more walkers. They regrouped with everyone in the lobby to decide how they would proceed.

"We'll stick to the first floor," Rick said. The group divided into six rooms which had twin beds. It was Rick and Carl, Lori and Carol, Maggie and Beth, T-Dog and Glenn, Marianne and Daryl, and Hershel with a room to himself.

Now that they knew for sure they were staying at the hotel, the group brought in all the supplies they needed and moved the vehicles to the back of the hotel.

When they were settling in they discovered that they had a problem. There was nowhere to safely make a fire inside but then Marianne remembered something and went out back to her truck. She had to dig a little before she found the small camper stove that came with the stolen truck.

It looked like a short canister, no more than three inches high and five inches in diameter, with square holes around the side and nestled inside of it were three other pieces. You needed to put together all four to make the stove. It wouldn't give off enough heat to warm up a room but at least they could cook.

Figuring out how to put it together took Marianne a few minutes but when she was finished she showed Carol, who did the majority of the cooking with the one person or another assisting her. "Will this do?"

Carol nodded. "Where'd you find it?"

"In my top hat where I get all the rabbits we eat," Marianne joked, inwardly cringing when she realized that Carol could take it the wrong way. Ever since Marianne had yelled at her for defending Daryl, their relationship had been a little strained.

Carol smiled. "You'd think a top hat would give you a fancier stove."

Marianne smirked. "Do you need any help?"

"No, Beth has already offered. Why don't you get some rest?"

Marianne nodded but she did the opposite. She found Maggie helping Glenn and T-Dog drag the couches and armchair from the seating area closer to the hallway.

"Hey Maggie. How about I start those lessons I promised you?" Marianne asked. Maggie quickly abandoned her current task. "We gotta do some setup first."

They commandeered one of the mattresses from a room they weren't using. Marianne kept the fitted sheets on and stuffed pillows underneath it. The mattress had springs and she didn't want the arrows to hit them too hard. The pillows would do little but it was better than nothing.

Maggie helped her drag it down the hallway, across the lobby and lean it upright on left wall of the lobby so they could get the most light. Marianne used a permanent marker from the office Rick and Daryl had found behind the concierge desk to draw targets.

Before they could start, Marianne insisted on spending some time adjusting the bow to suit Maggie. "It'll make it easier. I promise."

After Marianne was satisfied with the adjustments, the lesson started.

"You can have my release. I don't use it anymore. I found out my bow is, well I won't explain it, but I can shoot with my fingers just fine. But I'll show you how to shoot with the release." Marianne showed Maggie how to put it on and hold it. "What I like about this one is that it's a thumb trigger that you can take the wrist strap off of. Usin' the strap is useful if we're goin' into a situation where we know there'll be walkers but otherwise it can be a pain in the ass to wear it all the time. But on the other hand, without the strap you can end up dropping it and losin' it. And then there's the few seconds you need to pull it out of your pocket that could be crucial."

"Why can't I just use my fingers?" Maggie asked.

"Your bow is too short."

Marianne demonstrated how to shoot a bow, slowly going through each step to explain them.

"I didn't know so much went into it," Maggie said, a little in awe.

"You'll get used to it. Now, I'm aimin' for the bottom right target." Marianne put an arrow in place, drew her bow, and shot in one fast, fluid motion. Her arrow struck the middle of the bottom right target. Marianne did it again with a different target but in slow motion so Maggie could keep track of what she was doing.

"Your turn," Marianne said after shooting a few arrows and retrieving them from the mattress.

Maggie practiced for about an hour, until her arm got too tired. The whole time Marianne was adjusting Maggie's stance and giving her tips.

When it was getting close to bedtime Carol, Maggie, Beth, and Glenn retrieved comforters from the second floor. Daryl shook his head when he saw Marianne had layered five of them on her bed. He only had three.

"Not a word," Marianne said, pointing her finger at him. "I'm not a walking furnace like you are."

The siblings settled into their respective beds ready to sleep. Laying there in the dark and the silence gave Marianne time to think.

She sat up in bed. "Daryl?"

"Yeah?"

"We need to talk." The sooner, the better.

"Now?"

"Yeah. It can't wait," Marianne said. Daryl sat up. Even with her eyes adjusted to the dark she could only see the shape of him. His face was obscured by shadows.

"What is it?" He sounded tentative and little hopeful. Marianne grimaced. He probably thought she was going to tell him what had happened to her.

"You doubted me today and it's not the first time," Marianne said. "You never used to doubt me."

"I'm not doubtin' you. I…" Daryl trailed off and she wished she could see his face. "I wasn't there when you needed me." His voice was pained. "I can't make up for whatever happened to ya but I can be here now."

Marianne bit her lip and made sure her voice was steady before she spoke. "Daryl. I know you're here. But I want things like they used to be, as close as they ever can be. And I know I'm different but I'm still me. I'm still Marianne."

---

Marianne startled awake and was instantly aware she wasn't in a bed anymore. She blearily opened her eyes. Her back ached. Her head ached. The concrete she was laying on was cold but not as cold as she was.

She was in one of the stairwells under the stairs, an ice machine partially blocking the area underneath the stairs so when someone came out of the door they wouldn't see her.

A tired sigh escaped her and then a groan as she gingerly sat up. Marianne scooted backwards a little to use the wall to prop her up. She looked up and saw Rick standing over her with his hands on his hips, a stance she found annoying, especially at this moment in time.

Instead of speaking, Rick handed her his canteen and she drank greedily. When she finished, she closed the cap and put it on the ground next to her.

"Now, we're goin' to have a talk," Rick said.

"I don't want to talk."

"Too bad. I'm putting my foot down. Things can't continue like they are."

"It can if I try hard enough," Marianne said. She could easily see Rick's jaw clench. "Where's Daryl?"

"He's not here. He had the last night watch and then left to go hunting. He didn't have to run around this place in a panicked search for you."

She had fallen asleep late that night and must have slipped out of the room after Daryl had left. "What time is it?"

"Almost 11 in the morning. We've been searching for two hours," Rick said. Marianne looked down at her lap and bit her bottom lip. "We even looked outside and I was about to send out search parties to spread out to a wider area."

She was feeling more and more guilty but Marianne didn't think she should be. This wasn't her fault and here Rick was, blaming her for the trouble she had unintentionally caused. "Are you tryin' to make me feel bad 'cause this wouldn't be happening if you had waited."

He tried to look her in the eye but she wouldn't have it. "I'm sorry for leaving you behind. I truly am. I have been since we left the highway."

The guilt on Rick's face made her feel a little better but she wouldn't let him off that easy. "Apology not accepted."

"How long are goin' to be mad at me?"

She crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm aimin' for a world record."

Rick gave a frustrated sigh and roughly ran a hand through his hair. "Damn it, Marianne. I'm tryin' to keep us alive. At every turn you're causin' trouble. Arguing. Questioning my decisions. Disobeyin' orders."

"There's one of your problems. I don't like orders."

"Then what would you suggest I do?"

"Askin' nicely would be a start."

"Then I'll ask nicely. Can you please stop causing trouble?"

Marianne pretended to think about. "Umm…no."

Rick was having a hard time keeping calm and Marianne would have smiled if she wasn't exhausted.

He took some deep breaths and Marianne sensed she really wasn't going to like what he was about to say. "Something's eating you alive. Can you tell Daryl, someone, anyone what's wrong?"

"No." Panic rose in her chest and gripped her heart. It was time to flee. Marianne stood up. Rick wasn't giving her enough room to pass so she'd have to push him aside.

She gave him a few seconds to move and when he didn't she shouldered past him.

"Marianne—"

She whirled around to look at him with wild eyes. "You don't understand! He won't see me the same, none of you will. You'll want me gone."

"I do understand."

"No, you don't." Marianne backed away from him towards the door. "You can't help me and I don't want your help."

"Marianne, just listen to me for a minute."

"Leave me alone!" It had just gotten through her sleep addled mind that they were on the second floor and that she should be going for the stairs and not the door so she changed directions.

Marianne heard a growl of frustration behind her.

"I killed my best friend!" Rick yelled. Marianne stopped dead in her tracks. He had shouted at her before but never with such anguish in his voice. "A man I grew up with. A man I considered a brother. He was goin' to kill me and take Lori and Carl. He thought I couldn't keep them safe."

Rick was breathing hard and Marianne thought he was finished but he continued.

"Lori's mad at me. I'm mad at her. Carl's starting to act out and I don't think I can fix it without fixin' me and Lori and I don't see that happening anytime soon." Rick looked at her with vulnerable eyes. "The baby's not mine and I don't know what I'm gonna do, how I'm gonna feel when its born."

She stared at him, stunned that he would bare part of his soul to her. This was unknown territory for Marianne. To know someone like this other than her brother.

She was sure Daryl kept things from her like she did from him but they knew most of what there was to know about each other.

"I've done terrible things. They do look at me differently but they don't hate me and they don't want me gone. I'm dealing with my own shit while tryin' to survive. I have an idea of what you're going through."

This thing happening with Rick was brand new and messy and he was confusing her again. He looked at her and what she saw in his eyes moved her. She didn't like it but she knew it was her turn to share. Marianne fought against her instinct to run. She went to the stairs going up and sat down on a step, not sure if she would be able to stand through the whole story.

"Jimmy made if off the farm," she said in a broken whisper. Tears threatened to fall but she held them back. "He didn't die there."

---

It was Rick's turn to stare, shocked that Marianne was opening up and shocked by this new revelation. Everyone, including him, had assumed Jimmy had died on the farm, partly because Marianne hadn't mentioned anything about it. Now he knew that he had left two behind.

He stayed silent. If he talked, he might ruin her momentum.

"We went to the highway but no one was there. All we had was Daryl's note so we started east. I spotted your campsite, the ruins, but we had just missed you. And then we went to the nearest town and I knew y'all had been there but we were too late."

His stomach felt like a pit. If he hadn't driven the group so hard, if he had let them rest, Marianne and Jimmy would've found them. It could've been that easy. His regrets were already piling up and she had barely started.

"We never stopped tryin' to find all of you. Jimmy trusted me, with everything." There was a long pause and it looked like Marianne was trying to brace herself for what she was going to say next. "Day thirteen. It was a nice morning. It was goin' to be one of our better days. I could feel it." She took a ragged breath. "I was so wrong."

Rick stepped towards her but stopped himself. Based on their shared history, she wouldn't want him to close the space between them.

"We found a gas station in the middle of nowhere and I went in alone. There were two men waitin' for me. I was too slow." She turned her head towards him but not to look at Rick. Instead she stared at the floor near his feet. "Frank and Will," she said with pure hatred. "I wish I could forget their names." Marianne glared at the floor and then her eyes looked distant. "They wanted more from me than just our stuff."

Rick's whole body tensed and his heart started pounding. He was horrified about where this looked like it was going and hoped to God it hadn't gone that far.

"They threatened me to get Jimmy to put his gun down. That's how I got this." She traced the scar on her cheek and Rick's jaw clenched. Marianne looked briefly at him and then stared at her lap where her hands were clasped together. "They asked Jimmy if he wanted to join them but Jimmy wouldn't." Marianne's hands began to shake. "He said he'd rather die so Frank shot him in the stomach."

He wanted to comfort her but he didn't know how. He would do anything to make her hurt less. Rick would have killed those two bastards given the chance.

"They started to take me to their camp where the rest of their group was but the idiots didn't tie me up. Frank held me at gun point instead. I made as much noise as I could walkin' through the woods, wishing on a damn star that walkers would show up." Marianne looked at Rick again. There was a glint of something indiscernible in her eye. "And they did." He figured it out—it was vengeance.

"I pretended to fall and slipped a knife out of my boot and hid it up my sleeve. I stabbed Frank, took his gun, and ran. They shot at me, I shot Will." Marianne was rushing her words. "Walkers heard us but Frank and Will didn't hear them. Frank got bit, went down real quick. Will tried to get away but I shot his leg and they swarmed." The glint disappeared and her voice slowed and dulled. "I smiled when I heard them scream. I enjoyed their pain. Good people don't do that."

"Marianne." Rick took a step forward. He wanted to tell her she was a good person. That if she was bad, she wouldn't be so torn up over what she had done. She wouldn't be torturing herself.

Marianne held up her hand. "There's more." She took a deep breath. "I found their camp. No one was there so I hid and waited. Three men showed up. No, two men and a teenager." She closed her eyes. "I shot the two men in the head before they even knew what was happening. The boy… he begged for his life. I killed him anyways."

Her eyes opened and they were filled with pain.

"You had to do it. You didn't have a choice," Rick said, hoping the sincerity in his voice would get through to her.

"I tell myself that. That I needed to kill them so they wouldn't hurt me or anyone else. I tell myself it was the right thing to do but I know I'm lyin'. I had to kill Frank and Will but I didn't have to kill the rest, especially the boy. It was cold-blooded murder." Marianne looked him straight in the eye. "But all I could see was Jimmy lyin' on the ground, bleedin'. And I wanted them dead."

How could he make her understand?

"I killed those two men in the bar without even blinking and I don't feel guilty about it," Rick said. "I'm glad I did it or they would've killed us and taken the farm. If those men had found you, they would've hurt you. It was you or them."

"But you couldn't kill Randall."

"I was going to. If it wasn't for Carl. But now I'm not so sure that would stop me anymore." Rick paused and Marianne turned her head away from him, making it hard to see the expression on her face. "I see you now like I always have. A survivor and a pain in the ass."

Her head whipped around and she gave him a dirty look. "You're the pain in the ass."

He saw her snark as a good sign. "You ought to tell Daryl."

Marianne was silent for a long time but Rick stood there patiently. Finally, she nodded and stood up, her shoulders set in a new resolve. "I hope he gets back soon."

---

A/N: Congratulations for making it to the end! I'm glad you weren't deterred and I hope you enjoyed it.

So, I'm super, super nervous about the ending. It's a turning point in Rick and Marianne's relationship and I spent a lot of time on it. I tried to make it plausible and I hope I succeeded. Feedback would be great. It'd help me know if the progression of their relationship is making sense.

Anonymous Howler: Sometimes I wonder about that and wonder what it is about my writing or story that doesn't move people to review. I can only hope and wish for more. It's pretty lame but I've had dreams where I have received reviews.