The last chapter almost made me cry when I was writing it, yet it got the fewest responses of any of the chapters I've ever written. I rely so much on your feedback and I wasn't sure if that meant it was badly written, was too sad, or if ya'll were just angry with me.
Sad Sova = slower postings.
Since I started writing the last chapter, I've had this new story angle churning in my head. It will be a slow build so without further ado:
Hours passed in the plane. The space was dark and heavy, only serving to fuel my despair-driven rage. I had sat curled up in the furthest row of seats, knees tucked to my chest as I pushed myself tightly into the wall. I both wanted to scream, and make myself as small as possible.
To their credit, both warriors had the sense to stay away from me. I could hear them occasionally shift in their spots, but since my outburst they hadn't said another word. I hated them. Or I at least let myself think that I did, it felt better that way.
I sat unmoving, shifting through my chaotic spectrum of emotions until everything around us was completely silent. No crackling fog groaning from above, and then we waited even longer after that. Just to be sure. It was only when the faint sound of voices pierced the silence did we start to move again.
Jaxon was on his feet first, muttering to the other warrior about the sounds overhead. They were speaking in our tongue, they had to be our people. Moving to my feet I moved closer to the sealed door as well. I was ready to out of this tin can. Maybe in different life I would have appreciated the technology and innovation of the early aeroplanes, but at the moment it just felt like a coffin.
Jaxon was first out the door, sword in hand. After determining that we were apparently in no sudden danger, he reached his arm back down to help me out. I didn't want his help, and I certainly didn't want him to touch me. I wasn't ready to forgive him yet. So I ignored his offer and instead braced myself awkwardly on a nearby seat and heaved myself out of the door on my own, brushing past him as I moved to stand on my own.
Nyko and the others had found us, as I scanned their faces I was for a moment relieved that they had found safety in time. But that feeling lasted only a moment. While the other of Anya's men had come over to greet us, both Penn and Nyko stood off in the distance, gathering around an unmoving body.
I let out a choked cry, fresh tears silently falling down my cheeks once again. The sound caught both of their attention, and at the sight of their solemn faces the tears fell faster. Both men moved towards me, Penn finding me first pulling me into his chest. I constricted my arms around his waist as I buried my head into him shaking.
"I'm sorry," I whispered, biting back the sobs as I desperately tried to explain myself. "I didn't mean to… We couldn't …. I tried…."
Penn hushed me softly as I fought for the right words. How did I explain that I had let his best friend, our best friend, die so easily.
"It's not your fault Cole," Nyko said softly from beside us. His large hand resting gently on my back did little to soothe me though. He didn't know.
"I should have tried harder," I whispered, distraught. "I shouldn't have let Jaxon stop me."
Nyko glanced over to where I assumed Jaxon and the others were still standing.
"He fell behind," Jaxon explained, his voice lacking the usual authoritative bark. "There wasn't enough time."
"I should have tried harder," I repeated, pulling myself impossibly closer into Penn.
"There is nothing we can do about the dead," one of the other warriors spoke, breaking the silence that had fallen over the group. "We still have supplies to gather, and the rest of your tribe to meet and lead back. We need to move forward."
"We've already lost good time," the second warrior agreed. Stepping back from Penn, but not disconnecting entirely, I looked at the others for the first time. The second warrior was gingerly nursing a fresh cut on his cheek. I had apparently hit him earlier when I had thrown one of my knives at him, and I was silently cursing myself for not throwing it a little further left.
"We're not going to just leave him," I said, finding power in my shaking voice. I had let him die so carelessly, I would not let him rot away the same. The clan had death rituals for warriors, for their bodies to be eaten by flames so that they would be reborn from the ashes. Artigas deserved a warrior's burial, and I was going to make sure he got one. Even if it was the last thing I did on this god forsaken planet.
"He's literally dead weight," the warrior argued.
"He's one of your brothers, and deserves a proper burial" I spat back, my tone hiding none of the malice I felt for him.
"The body will only slow us down," the other warrior supplied, choosing a side. The wrong side as far as I was concerned.
"If you're too weak to carry him, I'll do it myself," I sneered. The second warrior went to step towards me. We had confronted each other on a number of things so far on this trip, and I hadn't backed down from him yet. And I sure as hell wasn't going to start now.
"Enough," Nyko interrupted. "Artigas is one of us, we will bring his body with us and when we meet up with our tribe in a day's time we will build him a pyre as tribute."
He looked around the group, making sure everyone understood that this topic was no longer up for debate.
"We will build a sled to pull him on," he continued. "And we'll each take our turn."
Nyko looked as if he was going to continue speaking, but the issue was well enough resolved for me. Without a word I turned into the woods, walking away from the group to go on the search for sturdy branches we could use to build a stretcher.
Jaxon's POV
"Was there anything you could have done differently?" the healer asked lowly as he slowed down to walk beside me on the overgrown path. I was trailing the others, my eyes scanning for any other unexpected threats. It had been quiet since we set off from the bunker, but that meant very little.
"No," I answered softly. Leaving Artigas in the fog was not a decision made lightly, but it was the one that had to be made. I would have never made it to him in time, the fog would have consumed us both. It would have left Cole unprotected, and alone. The decision was hard, but it was right I thought again to myself as my eyes fell on the woman in question. She refused to speak to me, barely even looked at me. It created a strange sinking sensation when she shied away, but I pushed it aside. She was alive, and that was all that mattered. She could hate me if she needed to.
"Then just give her time," Nyko told me, his gaze also falling on Cole. I didn't reply, I had nothing else to say to the healer. Instead we watched silently as Cole and Penn pulled the stretcher along the path, working together to lighten the load. We walked in step for a few more miles, before coming up to the last uphill climb before we reached the meeting point.
I picked up my pace slightly, breaking away from the healer walking towards both Cole and Penn who had stopped for a moment to grab water. She was breathing hard, and I decided that she had done enough. I could help ease her trek and take up the sled from here.
"Let me," I called to them, as they recapped their water skins. Penn nodded once in my direction but Cole was a different story. Her glazed over eyes narrowed slightly at my approach.
"I've got it," she replied, her voice not matching her glare. It was evident that she was tired, today had taken its tole on my tough little sky girl. I should have stopped them earlier.
"We're almost to the meeting spot," I explained, trying to keep my tone even. Even in a good mood she often challenged my authority, I didn't feel like pushing her any further. "You've brought him this far. We just need to get over the hill, let me take him from here."
She warily eyed the hill before us. While not as steep as the mountain from earlier, it was a steady incline to the top. She shifted on her feet before turning back to me. Tired or not, her eyes were on fire, set with determination.
"Please?" I asked quietly, cutting her off before she could deny me again. As a leader, I didn't often ask for permission to do anything. It wasn't our way to show such weakness, but it was a prompt I knew Cole would respond to. And right now, she was the only one that mattered. There were no armies to lead or enemies to fight, just the one little warrior in front of me who looked ready to collapse.
"Ok," she conceded, nodding slightly as she spoke. Her eyes lost some of their edge as her eyes met mine. "Not much longer?"
"No," I told her, silently happy that she had finally spoken to me for the first time not out of anger. "Just over the hill."
She nodded again, taking in my words. Tightening the pack straps around her shoulders she turned and started walking up the path, the others on the move now as well taking her lead. Letting the others take the lead she stayed a few paces ahead of me, stopping back occasionally to glance at me. She didn't complain or make a single noise as we climbed, despite the obvious strain it was for her. The pride I felt soared in my chest.
Her heart was to soft for this world, but she protected it fiercely. And I knew, from the moment that werecat attacked her months ago, that I would do anything to protect her as well. I was content to follow behind her for now. In time her anger and pain would dull, and until then I would have her back until she let me back by her side.
I had never been happier to see smoke on the horizon. A top of the hill, I could make out the camping area of the rest of our tribe and I felt a sudden weight release from my shoulders. We were finally back where we belonged, we were safe and we could rest. Closing in the rest of the distance to the camp, I nearly groaned aloud as I smelled fresh cooked food. I set my pack down with the others, sparing only a quick glance back at Jaxon who was speaking quietly with another man, gesturing towards Artigas' body.
My eyes met Jaxon's steel grey and he just nodded slightly towards the direction of the fire. Silently letting me know that he would handle the burial I suppose. He had pulled the stretcher the entire way up the hill, not complaining or grunting once. I almost thanked him, but I couldn't bring myself to voice the words. While my anger towards him was waning, the hollow pain in my chest was still unforgiving. Still, knowing deep down that I could trust Jaxon I moved away towards the central fire.
"Cole!" a voice screamed towards me, followed by a body barreling into me roughly. I grunted in pain as their arms tightened around me, picking me up off the ground.
"Get off her," Penn growled, pulling the foreign body away from mine. Finally getting a chance to glance up I saw that it was Lucas who was twisting uneasily in Penn's grasp with that stupid smile on his face. I almost smiled, but found myself unable. So I settled with the friendliest look I could muster.
"Hey Lucas," I greeted, watching Penn release him warily. "It's good to see you again."
I meant it too. We had never been incredibly close, despite his persistence. But he was a face I recognized, and a friendly face at that. I wouldn't take that for granted again.
"You too," he replied, looking me over once. "Are you alright? You look a little worn."
Penn bit back a laugh and rolled his eyes. That did get me to smile slightly. Space habits are contagious apparently.
"I'm exhausted honestly," I told him. "I feel like I could sleep for an eon and it wouldn't be enough."
"Eat first, then sleep Cole," Nyko's gravelly voice called as he moved towards us.
"Nyko," Lucas greeted respectfully, yet shyly.
"Boy," Nyko responded, nodding once which was possibly the friendliest greeting I've ever seen him give Lucas. "The sun is already setting, Jaxon has talked to the others and got them to agree to stay here one more day. It is our custom to lite burial pires as the sun starts its descent. We will bury Artigas tomorrow."
I nodded as I took in the new information. Staying in one spot for too long was dangerous I knew, but I was grateful for this small exception. Silently, I moved towards the fire where food had been lined out.
"Burial?" Lucas asked, handing me a makeshift bowl to pile meat and whatever else I could into.
"Artigas," I bit back, my voice wavering slightly. The hollow feeling in my chest dropping sharply. Glancing down at my my half filled food bowl I decided that would be enough, I didn't feel hungry. I just felt sad and tired and no amount of venison was going to help.
"Oh," Lucas acknowledged quietly. "He was just a boy, what happened?"
"He was a warrior," I corrected, taking a seat near the fire. "We were trapped by the radiation fog, he didn't make it in time."
"Well I'm glad you're okay at least," he replied. Deep down I knew he meant well, but I couldn't bring myself to see it at this moment. His comment just angered me, as if my life was somehow more valuable than Artigas' had been. He had been smarter and stronger than me, he was meant for this planet. I was just here by mistake.
"Is that why he's upset as well?" Lucas asked his voice picking up a hard edge. I spared a glance at him, before tracking his gaze across the fire. "It seemed like he never left your side back home, but he's keeping his distance now. Is he finally leaving you alone?"
I let out a low growl, startling the boy next to me. He spoke about Jaxon as if he was an insignificant pest and it angered me more than I expected. I was allowed to be angry at the stupid warrior if I wanted to, but not Lucas.
"I've made friends here Cole, if you need people to protect you from him …. I don't want to see a repeat of what happened before," Lucas continued, misreading my tension. It took me a moment to figure out what he was referring to, but a sudden chill ran over me once I realized. Setting my barely touched food bowl down I moved to stand up, only to be stopped by Lucas grabbing my shoulder. Without a second thought I grasped his wrist and angled my shoulder into his chest, using my momentum to barrel him over me onto the ground painfully.
"Listen Lucas, and listen carefully," I growled lowly, his wrist still bent painfully in my grasp. We had everyone's attention on us now, but I was focused on the boy in front of me. "I chose to be at Jaxon's side, and I certainly don't need you of all people to protect me from him or anything else. He is a good man, a good leader, and fierce warrior who has never hesitated to protect me from anything. He is nothing like Delano and if I hear you say his name one more time I will break your goddamn arm."
I pulled tighter on his wrist for emphasis, he yelped but nodded in agreement. Letting him go, I stood to my full height, looking around at the watching eyes who had gathered near the fire. My eyes only stopped on the steel grey I was so accustomed to, but even with his heated concerned glare I wasn't placated. I turned and stalked away, angry at Lucas, at Jaxon, at the whole stupid planet Earth for what was happening.
Finding the cot that my stuff had been set down on, I switched it with Penn's so I could be tucked against the furthest wall. Not bothering to change, I only shed my jacket before collapsing, pulling the thin blanket over myself. I was ready for today to be over, so I shut my and let myself fall into darkness.
"Cole," Penn's voice called, pulling me from my sleep. He called my name again, this time shaking me lightly. I grunted, sleep still weighing heavily on me. Whatever time it was, it wasn't time to get up. It couldn't be.
"Cole, come on," Penn urged gently. "That boy is yelling for you outside, says it's important."
I grunted louder, "tell him to go away. Whatever it is can wait."
"It apparently can't," Penn replied, laughing at my grumpy mood. "He said it's about Artigas but he only wants to talk to you."
The sound of my friends name got me to open my eyes, only to find a smirking, smug Penn. The warrior moved back, giving me space to get up. Looking around, he and Jaxon were the only ones up.
"I'm going to kill him," I warned, going to pull the blanket off of me, only to find that I was now wrapped in two. That would explain why I was so warm and comfortable. I looked suspiciously at Penn who just shrugged and shook his head. I glanced over at Jaxon who just regarded me emotionlessly.
"I'm still mad at you too," I told him, still shaking off sleep and untangling myself from the warm second blanket I knew had come from him. Stupid caring sensitive asshole.
"I know," he told me, with a slight smirk. Everyone was to chipper I thought to myself, making me reevaluate my plan to kill Lucas. Maybe I'll just kill everyone, than I can sleep for as long as I wanted.
I finished half hazardly tieing the laces on my boots, they were loose but I didn't care. The sooner I got this over with, the sooner I could take them off and get back to sleep. Exiting the tent, with both warriors behind I groaned as I realized even the sun wasn't up yet.
"Is that the only sound you can make right now," Penn teased. I glared at him, but bit back a response as Lucas approached us. This was his fault.
"I'm sorry to wake you up Cole," he started, eyeing both of the warriors standing behind me. "But it's important."
"So I've been told," I replied, not hiding the tiredness and bitterness in my voice. "Are you going to actually tell me what's so important? Or do I have to guess?"
"It's about Artigas," he replied, shifting uneasily. He paused and stood there for a moment, just looking at me like that was supposed to mean anything. There were a million possibilities going through my head, but I was to tired to shift through any of them.
"The point Lucas," I growled. "Find it faster."
"Me and one of the healers went to prep the body this morning, start building the pyre and get what we needed for the ritual," he explained, still taking far too long for my liking. "But Cole, last night you said that he was killed by the radiation fog."
His comment was a statement, but he phrased it like a question and it took everything in my not to just turn around and go back to bed to be done with him.
"He was," Jaxon supplied for me, sensing my discomfort.
"Here's the thing," Lucas continued, ignoring Jaxon's interruption. "He doesn't have any burn marks, no discoloration, no decomposition. There's just some dry black blood and that's it."
"Then you're looking at the wrong body," I growled, thoroughly annoyed. I had seen the damage first hand, had seen the radiated burns and scarring. I shuddered slightly at the memory.
"It's him Cole," Lucas promised. "And it gets stranger. I checked on him a few hours ago, and thought that was strange. But when I just went back, he actually has some of his color back. It looks like he's sleeping."
"Is he breathing?" I asked curtly, not believing him. Lucas shook his head no.
"Then he still sounds dead," I replied. I wasn't sure what sort of sick joke this was but I was over it.
"Can he bring people back from the dead like you can?" Penn asked me seriously. Despite numerous attempts on explaining CPR, people still thought what happened with Penn was nothing short of a miracle. I sighed and shook my head, ignoring Lucas' obvious confusion.
"No Penn," I told him. "It doesn't work like that. And don't you think that if I could have saved Artigas that I would have?"
Penn nodded, the quick flash of hope in his eyes fading.
"Cole, I know it sounds strange," Lucas pleaded. "But I'm serious, please come see for …."
He was cut off by another man running towards us. Lucas called out to him in acknowledgment.
"You …. You need to come now," the man said, panting as he caught his breath. "He's awake."
"Who is?" Jaxon questioned suddenly from beside me.
"The boy, Artigas," the man replied. "He just woke up."
For a second I stopped breathing. Nothing was making sense, and if this was all a joke I was seriously going to go on a rampage. But what if… There was only way to know for sure.
With no hint of exhaustion I was focused now. I locked eyes with the man, "show me."
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