2 Song Suggestions!

Queue: Strange Birds by Birdy

MAVEN

"I expected a lot the next time I dropped by but certainly nothing like this."

I couldn't help but smile and breathed a sigh of relief. I knew, logically, she would be back, but since her last visit I've felt a tightness in my chest like my heart was being ripped away.

I had only a second to rejoice in the moment that Mare is here before I comprehended her statement.

"I don't see what you mean," I say.

"Your sulking. I thought you were beyond such things."

"You left in such a hurry last time, I was afraid you wouldn't come back."

Mare may not be honest with me, but I'm done lying to her. All it does is waste time. And I prefer not to waste anything that involves her.

"I never said I wouldn't," she says with a furrowed brow.

I just shrug. When I look down I realize I am sulking. The dinner I had brought to my chambers now sits cold on the small table in front of the couch I'm sitting on. The same couch where we kissed.

I fire burns in the fireplace in front of me. Despite it being the middle of the summer, I lit it hoping it'd give me a sense of control. It didn't. I've been picking at the food for the past hour and a half. And I even turned on some music hoping it'd make me feel better. It didn't.

Shedding her jacket and placing it on the arm of a chair in the corner, Mare comes over and to my surprise, sits next to me, as if she doesn't care what happened the last time we sat like this.

"Of course I would come back. We're in this for life remember?"

I nod. Then she reaches over and takes the half-eaten roll from the table and tears off a piece for herself before setting the remains down on its plate.

"Look, I ran out like I did because I got scared. I'll admit that."

"Scared of what?"

"I don't know," she picks even smaller pieces from the bread and eats. "Feelings maybe."

"Feelings?"

"Yes, Feelings! Do you have to repeat everything I say?"

I raise my hands in mock surrender. "Someone's on edge."

With a huff, Mare reaches over again grabs the cup of wine and takes a sip.

"Sorry, I'm just tired and tense. It's just lately I've been thinking that…"

"What?"

"I don't know. Sometimes I think that everything would be so much simpler if things like emotions didn't get in the way."

"Well, take it from someone who's had their emotions played with from time to time. That-" I delicately take the glass of wine from her hand and take a sip, "is entirely accurate."

"Maybe relationships aren't for me." She takes another bite of her bread.

"I'd drink to that," I say as I down the last of the wine.

"I take it married life isn't going so well."

"Hardly married," I say before I can stop myself.

Mare gives me an inquisitive look.

"Not that I'm complaining, but I doubt you came all this way to discuss failed relationships."

Picking up the remainder of the bread roll she says, "Maybe I just came by for the food. Oh, which reminds me."

She stands and walks over to where her jacket lies. From this angle, I see she's been working out every part of her body.

She shifts the leather in her hands searches its pockets and pulls out a crumpled up napkin with something hidden inside. When she turns around I rest my gaze on the fire as to make sure she doesn't suspect that I was staring. Mare then sets the napkin on the table and delicately opens it up to reveal a very squished muffin. At least I think it's a muffin.

"Sorry, it got crushed on the way here but…" she picks off a piece and pops it into her mouth. "It's still good."

"Um," I reach over and break off a piece of the muffin like pastry. "Why?

"Well, you gave my sister's work back to me. And then I remembered how you talked about your favorite bakery the first time we arrived in Archeon. I'm guessing you didn't get any free time to go there in a while. So figured the least I could do is bring you something close to the real thing."

"I told you a lot of lies, what makes you think that wasn't one of them?"

Mare just shrugs, "call it a leap of faith."

"Hmm." And with that, I take a bite. For a brief moment, I think about the possibility of poison but the thought quickly escapes me for two reasons. One, I recall Mare taking a bite, and two, it's perhaps one of the best things I've ever tasted. I'm not sure what my face looks like but based on Mare's reaction, it called for worry.

"I know it may not be what you're used to, but I thought it was good."

Shaking my head, "No," I say. And then without thinking I place my hand on top of hers. "Sorry." I remove my hand. "No, it's really good. Uh, did you make this?"

I'm rambling. And almost on instinct, I reach out to the heat in the room, hoping that it'll be enough of a distraction to the heated flush creeping up my neck. I hate the way she makes me feel. I feel out of control whenever she's near, so much that my heart races.

"No," she says quickly. And then a small smile appears at the corners of her mouth. "I can barely make toast. A friend of mine made it."

"Well, you'll have thank them for me. Or better yet, ask them to make more."

Her smile widens and with every passing second, I find it increasingly difficult not to lean over kiss her. But that would only drive her away.

Instead, I reach over and grab another piece of the muffin and Mare does the same. We eat in silence and within a minute the pastry is gone.

Mare folds her arms over her chest and leans back, staring into the fire. "The wedding is in less than a month," she says. I just blink at her. I try to read her face for a sign of pain. But as I suspected, I find nothing but apathy. "And then once it's done, the entire state of Delphie will be in open rebellion."

"And I will have lost half of Norta," I say

The room is near icy now. It's not until I see goosebumps for on Mare's arms, do I relent.

"Everything is nearly in place, we just need the diamond glass."

With a nod, I stand and make my way to my closet in the bedroom. Hidden a few boxes is a backpack full of the specially crafted diamond glass she requested.

As I turn around to make my way back I see Mare standing at the threshold.

I hold out the bag to her. "This is the first batch," I say. "I'll have more each time you drop by."

She nods and takes the bag and unzips it. She reaches in and pulls out the long velvet box that holds what she asked for in a note left on my balcony door a few days ago.

She opens the box carefully.

"You made two," she whispers.

"Just in case," I say.

Mare nods and places the box back into the backpack and then walks back into the living area. But to my surprise, she doesn't retrieve her jacket to leave but instead places the bag in the chair beside it.

She then goes and sits back down on the couch. And I watch her for a second too long before moving to join her.

"Have you ever wondered what it's like to die," she whispers.
A normal person might find the topic morbid and ask if they're okay. Any sane king might reach for any available weapons, especially one with an assassination attempt on their record. But Mare and I have a language of our own. And this is no different.
"You mean physically."
"Yeah."
"Well, I would be lying if I said it never crossed my mind."
My fingers graze over my neck, where a bullet had ripped through my artery, and I lied helpless during a coup. The evidence of the event is gone, but the memory still stings.
"Why do you ask?"

Mare turns and places her hand on the base of my neck and runs her thumb over the long healed wound. And I'm certain she could feel my rapid heartbeat.
She could kill me right now. She could send the force of an entire storm into my body, and end this. She might even be able to escape without anyone knowing.
But she doesn't.
"Lately, I haven't really felt like I'm living," she confesses. "I feel like I'm standing to the side -"
"And someone else is in control of your body, your mind."
She nods.
"I feel so empty all the time, even when I'm with my family. Like I'm dead inside. Like I'm-"
"A ghost."
"Yeah, a ghost."

Her hand remains on my neck. But if there is any threat, I don't see it. What I do see is someone who was once so certain become so lost. I once told Mare we are not the same, but even. I now realize that is not entirely accurate either. We're more like mirror images of each other. Two people from two different lives, but a perfect reflection of the other. Both stuck in the same place.

Queue: Hypnotic by Zella Day

I want to ask her so many things. But I settle on one question.

"What do you want, Mare?"

The question takes her by surprise. But her answer is sure. "I want to feel alive."

And then without warning, she pulls me forward with her hand still on my neck and we crash into an embrace.

MARE

I'm not entirely certain when in my mind I decided to do this. But I know for a fact that being with Maven makes me feel alive. The closer I am, the brighter my being burns. And the sad part is he is the only person I can truly be myself around. When I'm with my family and friends I feel like I have to hide who I am. I've tried too long and hard to be someone else.

Everyone wants something from me. Gisa and mom still want me to give up fighting and go to Monfort. Davidson and Jon tell me this is the only way to win with the least casualties. And then there's Cal. This is the ultimate betrayal. And I don't care.

Maven might pretend that it's this deal he wants from me, but I know better. He wants me for me. And even though that need is derived from his obsession it still means something.

Maven moves one hand to the back my neck-caressing the scars that the sounder gave me-and pulls me closer. I oblige.

Our kiss grows stronger with every passing second. And when he wraps his arm me, it feels like second nature. The taste of him is surreal. Whereas Cal treated me like I was some delicate feather that could be crushed or blown away with too much force, Maven kisses me with the same desperate need but with one key difference: I am as strong as the diamond glass that sits just a few feet away.

Pretty soon I'm straddling him and his hand moves to the base of my back, but it doesn't stray further.

Then I remember something. Breaking the kiss, I take his face in both hands.

"Wait, Maven," I say. "There are two things I need know."

"Anything," he says out of breath. I can feel his desire growing from where I sit on his lap, so I make my case quickly.

"When you said earlier that you were 'hardly married,' you… haven't… with Iris?"

His silver flush answers my question. But I can tell he's warring with himself for an explanation.

"In the eyes of the country, we are married. But as for the… consummation… we never got around to it. Eventually, I guess. But right now... I'm not interested and she doesn't mind."

I nod. "One more thing. I need you to understand that when we do this, there can't be any strings. My life is complicated enough. Like I said, I can't really deal with emotions right now. Just straightforward and casual."

This troubles him, I can tell. But a light flickers in his eyes. And I recall what Maven told me about Thomas.

You're like Thomas was. You are the only person who reminds me I'm alive. Not empty. And not alone.

I press my forehead against his. "You are not alone," I whisper.

He meets my gaze. He remembers like I do. "I know," he whispers back.

And then his lips are on mine. And then my jaw and then by my ear. I move my hair to the side and Maven kisses the pulse of my neck. And a warmth I haven't felt in a while floods through me.

I make sure to be the one to remove my belt, while Maven sheds his shirt. This time I ignore that it's the same shirt he trains in. It lands near the table of forgotten food. And mine follows suit. Maven picks me up and I quickly wrap my legs around his waist. I put my arms around his shoulders and press myself closer to him. His lips never leave mine. But when he collapses on top of me, as my back hits the cool mattress of the bed, I let out a grunt as I take on his weight.

But I quickly kiss him again to reassure him.

The bed is slightly bigger than the one in Archeon, but not by much. I run my hand down his chest and the other from his bicep to his shoulder and then to his back. Maven might not be broad like Cal, but he certainly doesn't lack in muscle. And once the rest of our clothes greet the floor, I see he doesn't lack in anything, physically.

Far away I know this is a bad idea. I smile against Maven's lips. When have I ever made a good decision?

Might as well add another to the pile, I think.

In the other room, the fire still burns, but the brightest and hottest of flames burns before me in a beautiful shade of blue.

ANALYSIS

Okay, so…

Can we just take a moment so I can tell you how long I have been waiting to write this chapter? It was so hard. Pun intended.

I really hope I did it justice.

Remember when I said I leave hints and foreshadowing everywhere? Did anyone catch the one from the last chapter? It was the title. Before, I said that the titles are lyrics from one the song choices, but they all have meaning.

The last chapter was titled "Well Acquainted." Which was one of the lyrics of the song Control by Halsey. But that was not the full line. The completed line is: "I'm well acquainted with villains that live in my bed." At least, one website I used it said "bed." On others its "head".

Anyway, as I was writing this I realized Maven might be coming off as kinder than he was in King's Cage. So let's all acknowledge he was a really bad guy. So why this sudden change? It will be addressed in the next chapter! And we will finally be able to reveal the true reason Maven agreed to this plan. So stay tuned!

I will also be announcing the winners of my first SWEEPSTAKES next Chapter! Yay! But you still have time. So get going!

I feel like forgot something, whatever it is I'll just address it later.

Just kidding I remember now! I didn't learn this until recently but I when I was contemplating the second song suggestion, I found out Hypnotic by Zella Day was used during the sex scene between Stefan and Caroline in the Vampire Diaries. The two had turned off their humanity and had sex without any emotional strings attached. So the allusion fits perfectly. Also, in a certain way that I can't reveal yet. *winks*

Okay, now I'm done.

Until next time!