Disclaimer: Nu-uh.

Author's Note: So I was walking through the snow, thinking about Kuro (as per usual) and contemplating how pretty Sebastian would look in this sort of weather. (You know, with the white/black contrast.) And then—because my brain is constantly in fanfic mode—Sebastian and Ciel began having this conversation in my mind. Which I have now transcribed for you here. And I hope you enjoy it. :3

Dedication: A happy birthday to my dear LJ friend, i_are_qualified! :D

XXX

Beauty

XXX

"Why are you so beautiful?"

"…I am flattered that you consider me 'beautiful,' young master."

"Tch. Don't be cute. You know what I mean."

"You are referring to my ability to pick my appearance, I presume."

"You presume correctly."

"Then if I might take the liberty to offer a counter-question: would anyone choose to be ugly?"

"Any human, no. But you are not human, and you make no decisions unless there is some strategic value for it or reasoning behind it. It's in your nature."

"Perhaps it's Vanity. That is one of the Deadly Sins, you know."

"So is Gluttony and Sloth, neither of which you exemplify."

"Touché."

"So why did you decide on beauty?"

"Have you ever dangled a sparkling gem before a greedy aristocrat?"

"Beauty beguiles."

"Precisely, young master."

"So you fashion yourself into a diamond among refuse to attract those creatures with magpie-like tendencies?"

"You could phrase it that way, I suppose. Though I would not."

"Evil is beautiful to attract the terminally stupid."

"To attract humans."

"Same thing."

"…indeed."

"But I must confess, Sebastian, I find in this answer something of a conundrum."

"Would my lord care to explain?"

"Well, 'Good' is supposed to be beautiful, isn't it? Or so Lizzie tells me, after she returns home from the damn church. 'Good' is beautiful, because it is so clean and pure. But now you tell me that Evil also utilizes beauty, in order to bewitch its prey. But both can't be beautiful."

"Why ever not?"

"Because there is so much ugly everywhere. It makes no sense— if Good is beautiful, and Evil is beautiful, then even the gray between them should be beautiful. But this world is anything but…"

"Surely Lady Elizabeth did not tell you that all Good is beautiful?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Well, certainly some Good is beautiful, but that is not an overriding rule. For example, the Catholic's Bible proclaims that the Savior will return as a degenerative cripple. Perhaps this is merely a reflection of my own humble tastes, but I do not consider degenerative cripples very beautiful."

"…not all Evil is beautiful, either."

"Oh my. Does your brand hurt, young master?"

"Shut the fuck up."

"As you wish."

"…"

"…"

"…there at least has to be a difference between the beauties, doesn't there?"

"…"

"Sebastian?"

"…"

"Answer me."

"Oh, am I allowed to speak again?"

"Don't act like a child. It's unbecoming in one of my servants."

"My apologies, young master. What was the question?"

"Is there a difference between the beauties of Good and Evil?"

"Oh, most definitely. Surely my lord has noticed as well? The beauty of Good tends to base itself far more on the morality of life, while Evil is decidedly more… superficial."

"But not always."

"Young master?"

"Angels are supposed to be beautiful, aren't they? Physically, I mean."

"Who knows?"

"You do, don't you?"

"…"

"Don't smile like that—I hate it when you smile like that. Just answer the question."

"Well, Christian lore states that devils were once angels— angels who had Fallen."

"Yes, Fallen. Fallen from grace, from prestige. Implying that they are no longer beautiful."

"I am hurt. Are you retracting your earlier compliment?"

"…it's true, then?"

"Hmmm, though I don't believe 'Fallen' is the best world. It has implications, you see. 'Pushed' would be far more accurate, I think—when other, less beautiful angels saw their fellows and got jealous…"

"Ha. Now I know you're lying. I can hardly imagine you allowing yourself to be pushed anywhere."

"Perhaps Heaven was not the place I wanted to be."

"Earth caught your fancy, did it?"

"One gains more with beauty, here."

"…you're smiling again."

"You're blushing."

"Because you're far too close."

"Am I? Then order me away."

"…"

"Feeling beguiled, young master?"

"I'm feeling like you should either kiss me, or get the hell out of my face."

"Yes, my lord."

XXX