Sebastian stands his ground, although he takes his hazel eyes off of Constable Braddock's blue ones. He notices that his gun seems to be getting too close for comfort, but he can't seem to put it down. He understands? He knows, really knows, what it's like to be me? To feel like this day after day-

"I lost a buddy of mine, too," Sam's voice takes Sebastian out of his reverie. "We had made a pact together, and one morning I found out that he didn't make it." Here Sam's voice begins to loose its serenity and start to shake a bit. Knowing that he must contain his personal feelings and concentrate his energy on Sebastian, Sam tries again. "Look at me, Sebastian," Sam's tone returns to the sincere, friendly one that originated the conversation.
Sebastian wearily gazes up at Braddock while his thoughts spin around like a whirlwind in his mind.
"I know what it's like to hear people offer their sympathies, their 'it'll be okay's when you know that it's not okay-"
"That things will never be the same," Sebastian manages to mutter an interruption. Damn. I know what comes next. You let someone in and then they use everything and anything they can find against you.

Good. He's responsive, he's aware. We can get him home soon. "I also know that I can't pretend to know exactly what you went through and what you are feeling now."
"You're right," Sebastian's lips quiver as he speaks. His body is trembling and threatens to shut itself down. The stress is palpable to everyone around, not just the negotiator directly in front of the boy. Sergeant Parker briefs the medics, tells them about the dehydration and fatigue, but not to interfere with Sebastian until he gives the orders. The medics move in to check on Zack, but he insists he's fine and returns his attention to his best friend.
"Then help me to understand what's going on. I want to help you-" Sebastian's sarcastic laugh cuts off whatever words the constable had planned to tell Sebastian.
"You... you want my help, to help me?" Sebastian's laugh sounds more manic than ironic, and Sam decides to change his tactic.
"That's a nice piece you have there," Sam gestures towards the teenager's gun with his hand. "I've got one like that myself, gift from the family."

Sergeant Parker picks up Sam's intentions behind the statement. He had managed to get Sebastian's last name from Zack after a couple prompts. It was typical of the boy to protect his friend by not giving up his name, and eventually Zack yielded. "Winnie, can you see if anyone in Sebastian Quinn's family has a registered firearm, more specifically, if anyone has a Colt?" Sergeant Parker asks Winnie while watching the situation in front of him shift. It seems as if the end goal of returning Sebastian home is finally within reach, but Greg also knows that the circumstances can change for the worst just as easily as they can for the better.
"Matthew Quinn, Sebastian's uncle. He has a couple of guns, including a Colt, but none were reported missing," Winnie tells Greg. "His address is only a couple of miles away. Should I send someone there?" Winnie asks her boss.
"I'll have Wordy go."
"Copy, boss," Wordy replies and heads towards his Suburban.
"Winnie, I don't want the parents down here yet, can you keep their numbers on standby for me?" Greg asks.
"Sure thing. Standing by," Winnie replies.

Sebastian, confused by the negotiator's statement, remains in place with his gun by his side. Why is he complimenting Matt's gun? Doesn't he know why I have it here? Does he know it belongs to Matt? Is this going to get him in trouble? The whole point of being here is to keep everyone out of the troubled mess that is my life, not drag everybody down to hell with me.
"They let you carry vintage pieces in the force?" Sebastian manages to say.
"No, only tactical weapons allowed here," Sam replies before he remembers that mentioning the last bit may not be the best idea. No need to remind them both of the danger they are in, and the varying conditions that could make their position worse.
"Did your friend really die, or was that just something you said to get me to listen?" Sebastian suddenly asks without a trace of menace in his voice. "I mean, I wouldn't think of telling a lie like that..." he trails off, unable to meet the man's eyes.
"You're just unsure if I'm sincere, if I can be trusted," Sam's insides squirm with guilt and self doubt as he ventures again to connect with the youth standing two feet in front of him. "He was a good man, through and through. Nothing can change that fact. I need you to trust me, and I need you to trust that we can get through this, okay?" Sam's tone is firm, and Sebastian knows that what the negotiator had said earlier wasn't meant to get his attention.
Sebastian looks at the constable, embarrassed by the accusations he made. "I didn't mean to...you know...I'm sorry. About your friend. And what I said," Sebastian chokes up. If someone ever said anything about Kevin like what I said about Sam's friend...Damn it! Every time, every damn time I try to make something work I end up fucking things up to the point of no repair. I feel so dead on the inside, so why is my outside still here? Sebastian begins to clutch the right side of his stomach with his left hand while swinging the gun in his right hand. Sam sees that Sebastian is hurting and close to his breaking point.

"Why don't we sit down?" The negotiator gestures to a fallen log. When Sebastian doesn't make a move towards the seat, Sam tries to get the anguished young man to leave the clearing with him. "Okay, it's fine if we stand. Are you cold, Sebastian? Do you want to get a jacket?"
It is almost like the teenager is on another planet. Even though he is shaking and sweating, he seems unaware of his physical state. "I...I can't take it anymore," the reply is barely a whisper.
"Braddock, connect," Sergeant Parker's voice is urgent in Sam's headset. "We want to protect Mr. Quinn. If you need me to switch places with you, give the signal."
Sam keeps his hands in front of him, doesn't move the right one behind him and hold up two fingers, the pre-arranged signal to move on. Determined to carry on with his task, Sam places his hands on Sebastian's shoulders. A hazardous move to make in any negotiation, let alone one with an armed subject and unarmed officer. The teenager stays put, maintains his lopsided stance and makes no move against the man holding him in place- no plans of offense or defense. This worries Sam, seeing the boy so motionless and so filled with emotion. Emergency medics are waiting to make their move, and Winnie keeps the parents' numbers on speed-dial.
"Is there somewhere you can go?" the constable asks. Sebastian sniffles his nose, tries to get the tears out of his vision without moving his hands.
"What do you mean?" Sebastian returns. "I'm here...this is where I have to be...I.. I can't go back."
Instead of asking why Sebastian can't go back, or where he can't go back to, Sam resumes verbalizing his thoughts. "Is there a place you can picture in your mind, a place where you feel safe whenever you feel the way you are now?"
"I've never felt his way before," Sebastian denies, waiting to be called out. When no one replies, he continues. "I lied, just now. I have felt like this before, I have," he says, backing away from Sam's hands.
"What happened the last time you've felt-"
"Like total shit?" Sebastian interrupts. He's on a roll now, words flowing out of his mouth like a stream. He lets go of his stomach but not the gun. At this point, the gun is like part of his limb, or at least an additional finger. "I was scared, all right? I am scared. Is that what you wanna hear, that I get stuck in my own head and scared to death all the time? That being scared to death is terrifying, and death isn't anymore? I hate being scared," Sebastian whimpers. He's a sweaty, shaking mess, and at long last, he's pouring out his heart. "I don't like being alone, but I'm lonely when other people are around. I don't like being apart from everyone, but I can't be a part of them. I'm a hypocrite. I let my friend die- it should've been me, not him." Sebastian's wails pierce the quiet night.
"I'm so sorry, Sebastian. I'm sorry that no matter how much you try to explain it to me, I will never be able to feel your pain. Sebastian, I need you to know that you are more than the pain you feel." Sam moves closer to Sebastian, desperate to pull him back in to a place where he'll respond to kind, honest words.
"Don't come any closer! I'll do it, I swear I'll do it!" Sebastian yells, oblivious to the sympathy of the SRU negotiator, the SRU team surrounding him, and his friend beyond the clearing.
Zack breaks free of the medic treating him, tries to rush to Sebastian, but is stopped by Constable Young before he can reach his friend. Zack's words float over the distance. "Okay, I believe you man, just breathe," Zack calmly responds as his friend continues to wave the gun. Seb's breaths are uneven, shallow and heavy.
"Why won't you go away?" Seb asks, sobbing and yelling, tears streaming down his face. "Why won't this go away?!" he pleads.