Astro Boy

Which God is which?

An Astro/Zoran 2003 fan fiction

By Dan rush

Based on the 1980 Astro Boy Episode 44 "Uran's Quest"

Astro Boy / Tetsuwan Atom by Osamu Tezuka 1954. All rights respected. For non-profit fandom only.

Chapter 3

12:30am

"MC Skates park"

Metro Central Park

"Boof!" Atlas landed on his stomach at the bottom of the ramp as Astro flew by him up the incline, ballanced the tip of the skateboard on the rim of the dip, ballanced himself on the other end like a show off for a split second then came flying by Atlas again as he stood up...and promptly kicked Astro's board from under him on his return...

"Serves you right for being mean." Atlas snickered as Astro sat up from his spill...

"Are you using all your sensors?" Astro snorted. "You're hiding just so you can have an excuse to be a jerk."

"Uh uh..." Atlas said shaking his head. "I truly can't do this to save my butt. I am... skateboard non-inclined."

"You can fly but you can't skate...I find that impossible." Astro huffed as he pushed Atlas's board into his chest.

"Seriously Astro...I can't." Atlas huffed. "You probably can do it because obviously you have self calibration...something my builder decided not to install as an option."

Astro gazed at Atlas for a moment then reached for his chest. "Lemme see if I can set you up..."

Atlas slapped Astro's hands away. "Don't touch me?"

"You want to learn how to sakeboard or not?" Astro asked.

"You might gain advantages or try some form a sabotage." Atlas huffed.

"Tsk!...give me a break?" Astro fussed. "I'm not that dumb to try...you'd know, now let me see your chest monitor..."

Atlas pursed his lips as he clicked his chest door open. "You get slippery fingers and so help you..."

"Blah, blah, blah...shut up?" Astro snorted as he got on his knees to better access the operation panel. "When was the last time you had a proper check up?" Astro asked as he tapped on the small keyboard. "All my functions now are touch screen. You're using a confusing O.S. And your insides are filthy..."

Atlas batted Astro off the head. "Are you helping me or ridiculing me?!"

"I don't think being concerned about you is ridicule Atlas." Astro huffed back. "You need a cleaning and some updates...I should ask Reno to look at you."

"No human is going to lay their filthy hands on me." Atlas snorted as Astro stood up.

"I think I have you all set up...minus a few tweeks. And Reno's not a bad guy...for a human." Astro gave Atlas a light punch in the chest. "Now let's see if I got it right?"

15 minutes later...

Astro sat on the lip of the half-moon and watched Atlas work back and forth until he came up the incline flipped off his skateboard and landed on his backside to a sliding stop..."You're good at programming." He said as he sat on the lip. "So...back to our contest...if god exists? Then why won't he just come right out and show himself?"

Atlas stood up..."Hey GOD! Show yourself! I want to know why you made humans so messed up! Hello?!" Atlas mocked a hand to his ear then sat down..."See? Nothing."

Astro shook his head and pulled a 1000 yen note from a pocket. "Foop foop" If I could convince people that this 1000 yen bill was a dollar bill? I'd probably be rich."

Atlas cocked his head. "What kind of stupid example is that?"

"I don't think god wants to make anything "too easy" like just popping up out of the blue and saying "Yo! It's me!"...because he probably knows a few people will pull the same stunt? Like those "KEHL" guys remember?"

Atlas frowned..."The Keep Earth Human League"...they had that guru guy who looked like a bad cross between Elvis and a Budah? Ugh...and people followed that guy!"

"Besides that." Astro snickered. "Why would god listen to a little dumb ass like you?"

Atlas reached out and snatched Astro by his shirt..."You take that back!"

"But really Atlas?" Astro said with his hands up. "You think god is really going to show himself just because some loud mouth joe blow flaps his lips?"

Atlas thought..."If I were all powerful? I'd probably shoot a lightening bolt up the guy's butt."

Astro skitted back a few feet. "Please don't be that stupid? I don't want to be in the line of fire."

Atlas stood up and threw his board over a shoulder. "Sacrificing virgins to volcanoes."

"Now that's stupid." Astro replied. "Unless...no, that would deffinately not work out."

"How could you think about your sister like that?" Atlas snorted.

"You haven't spent enough time yet." Astro replied. "Fell like going back yet?"

"If your Mom's cooking dinner? Jeeyah...duh..." Atlas replied as he lit up his rocket boots..."Wanna do some air dragging?"

"I don't want to encure the wrath of the police." Astro replied scratching his head.

"You're a wuss." Atlas snorted. "I'll spread it through your school that you're a super wuss."

Astro smirked. "Hope you don't hit a highway sign chasing my sparks?"

1:45pm

Atom House

Father Atom was coming into the living room to take a break from working on the room addition when Atlas came running through the front door and bounded up the stairs to Astro's room!

"What the?!" Father Atom gasped as his son came in and closed the front door behind him...

"Young man! What is going on?!" Father Atom yelped.

Astro shooshed him for a moment before a heavy knock on the door caused him to turn around and open it to the two police officers standing outside...

"Hi Sargent Deutadi!" Astro said a little excited as he rubbed his head. "You're probably wondering what I'm thinking huh?"

"Which way did he go and why were you chasing him?" Deutadi huffed back. "Did he come into the house?"

Astro looked around. "I think he did...and he flew out the window upstairs..." Astro turned to Zoran who was standing at the top of the steps...

"Oh yeah! Right past my face and right out the window." She said pointing.

Father Atom walked up. "Will someone tell me what's going on?"

Deutadi smirked. "Apparently...Astro was chasing Atlas at high speed through the city and through the Ginza which caused more than a little miss in their wake. What brought this on Astro?"

Astro frowned. "He broke my skateboard."

"Oh he did? Then why didn't you call us and file a report?" Deutadi asked.

"Because he insulted my family and I lost my cool." Astro replied rubbing his foot over the floor.

"Sigh...and here I thought you had good self control. This is the fourth time you've let this little miscreant sucker you into a piss match Astro...I am really disapointed in you. You understand this will cause a little problem with the ministry right?" Deutadi warned.

"Yes sir." Astro replied with a sad face. "I'm sorry."

Deutadi bounced a finger off Astro's head. "I think your father can handle things from here? I want a report filed with us by the end of the day...do you understand?"

"Yes sir." Astro replied.

When Deutadi was gone...Father Atom stood brooding over his son. "Now...what was the real story? And you wonder why I sometimes nickname you "fudge" huh?"

Astro played with his fingers. "He...broke my skateboard when I didn't want to "drag" with him...then he called me a pussy."

"Uh huh...a likely cover story." Father Atom turned to the stairs. "ATLAS?! YOU BETTER GET YOUR BUTT DOWN HERE NOW YOUNG MAN!"

Father Atom turned to Astro..."I want your x-box...your television...your stereo and anything else you have for amusement down here now."

Astro slinked away as Atlas walked up and Father Atom pointed..."Get over here."

Atlas stood as if he were the boss...which quickly ended when Father Atom snatched him by an arm, threw him over his lap and spanked him a few times with an electrically charged force powerful enough to leave burn marks on Atlas's rumps...

"I hope that sinks in?" Father Atom snorted. "You and I are going to the Ginza and you will personally appologize to every store owner you offended with your little stunt. And don't worry...Astro will be right next to you."

Atlas frowned. "You have no right to spank me!"

Father Atom prepared to give another round. "You want to open your fat little trap again young man?"

"Ok! Ok!" Atlas yelped..."Sheesh...we were just having a little fun. No one got hurt."

"Be fortunate I'm understanding of my son Atlas or you'd be in jail right now." Father Atom replied.

4pm

Atom House

Astro flopped on his bed..."That! Was unpleasent! We should have been less stupid."

Atlas huffed..."Speak for yourself! You're not the one who got spanked like tender meat! The nerve of those people!" Atlas flopped on the floor. "Such indignity! We can't help it if we have mach cones following us when we fly."

Astro giggled..."You looked cute in that dress though. The one you ripped off the clothing rack when you weren't looking?"

"Oh blow it out your exhaust holes dufus!" Atlas snapped. "I will NEVER goad you again, do you hear me?! You're the one who pushed us to be all crazy!"

"Me?!" Astro yelped. "You broke my skateboard! I kept saying no but you didn't listen!"

"Saying that I'll eat your sparks is NOT no moron!" Atlas snapped back.

Astro pushed Atlas..."You're the moron!"

And with that...the fight was on! Zoran stomped out of her room just as Astro came flying out of his against a wall and was trying to charge back in when his sister tripped him..."UGH! QUIT IT YOU STUPID KNUCKLE DRAGGING MONKIES!" She screamed as Atlas caught Astro in a head lock...

"Well?" Atlas replied..."He started it."

"I did not!" Astro snapped. "Get off me you stupid dork!"

Zoran roughly threw them apart. "I don't suppose you two have gotten anywhere constructive as of yet on God? Stupid of me to even dare ask you two to do anything nice for me at all."

"Aw sis..." Astro replied with his hands out. "Look...we're both sorry...right Atlas?"

"You're a sorry piece of junk maybe?" Atlas snorted. "But yeah Zoran...we're sorry. And to be honest? There's no way for you to contact God save praying. His phone number is unlisted."

"We haven't even gotten through looking at every religion yet." Astro sighed. "There's so much to consider you know?"

Zoran sighed..."I wonder if robots are even worthy of god. From what Mauri-chan says...maybe we're no better than souless junk."

Atlas frowned. "How can you even dare accept the word of a stupid human?"

"That stupid human is my best friend." Zoran said pouting. "And she seems right. Humans are made by God and anything they make doesn't count."

Atlas stomped a foot. "That's enough of that crap!" He turned to Astro. "We're going to find out who God is and I'm giving him a big fat smack in the face."

"But you said..." Astro tried to remind Atlas.

"Oh screw what I said!" Atlas snapped back as he walked to the study desk and threw another book at Astro. "Let's get to work...I have a date with God to give him a piece of my mind."

Zoran smiled in approval. "That's the Atlas I like...mmmmmm...you are such a hunk!"

"Hey...what am I then?" Astro asked.

"You're just my dumb brother...now shut up and find God." Zoran commanded then she stomped out of the room.

Atlas giggled..."She told you."

"Oh shut up dufus!" Astro snapped back.

End of chapter 3