A startled awakening was what Shigure was subjected to upon waking up at the Yokosuka Military Hospital, temporarily tensing up upon remembering what had previously transpired before her inevitable death as she scanned her surroundings for any Abyssal threats.
But because of the conspicuous absence of the heavy rain, the aggressive Abyssals that nearly beat her to death and her fallen comrades in the adequately-sized hospital room, Shigure slowly allowed herself to take several deep breaths as she continued to scan the white-colored room for any signs of life.
The room had the kind of white hospital walls that made you feel like the entire place was a little too sterilized, clinical and impersonal, Shigure feeling a little uncomfortable due to the fact that she was a little fearful of doctors and what they could do to her.
The fact that Akashi was the base repair ship and was not entirely in her right mind didn't help much, as Shigure wondered when the repair ship was going to come into her room and start scolding her for her suicidal decision to run back into the battle when she was supposed to retreat and almost got herself killed in the process.
There was an incessant beeping in the room that was punctuated by less than a second of deafening silence and was only partially filled by the meek exhalation of cold air from the air-conditioner.
Although Shigure could clearly hear the heart-rate monitor that was on the side of her right ear, she was still pretty irritated by the constant, mechanical beeping that softly rang out throughout the small room, trying her best to tune it out from now on as she looked around the room to take in her surroundings.
She saw that the closed window was secured with a keyhole, probably to prevent any ship girls from opening the window and jumping out in an attempt to either escape or commit suicide, although Shigure wasn't sure about the feasibility of either course of action as she was sure that escaping the hospital wasn't going to do much when they would still be in the Yokosuka Naval Base, and jumping from such a relatively low height would never kill them.
Not that killing them was going to do anything more than inconvenience them for a few days at most.
The room itself was rather spacious, and it was big enough for it to feel a little like a bedroom, the window and curtains being on the wall to her left and had a small drawer made out of steel that stood at the corner furthest away from her bed, a small fake potted plant sitting on it and was patiently waiting for her to awake from her slumber.
The plant was a shiny green and had a few leaves sticking out innocently, and although they were positioned from the window so that they wouldn't catch much sunlight, it was obvious that it didn't need any, being created artificially as it stood proudly on its base that was the small brown pot of soil.
Shigure could see that there were two chairs sitting silently to the right of her medical bed and were made out of hard plastic and steel, the seats quickly losing her interest as she continued looking around.
Currently, no one was in the room save for Shigure, and she could see that the door that blocked the exit was a lacquered brown and had a small window on it to allow anyone to look in as she saw the milky-white walls of the hospital hallway.
No one was passing by to check up on her, Shigure not minding the temporary solitude as she took the time to cherish her comfortable bed and appreciate the technology that kept her alive and monitored her vitals as she tried to crane her neck.
She only used only her eyes to scan the room as she felt some resistance around her neck, straining to look down and found some sort of brace on her neck that restricted the movement of her head as she tried to struggle and get out of it in vain, trying to use her arms and legs to remove this cast only to find that they didn't respond for some reason.
She eventually gave up as she couldn't even feel her limbs, much less try to move them and resigned to her fate as a (hopefully temporary) quadriplegic as she tried to angle her head so that she could get a better look at the machine that kept her alive.
The heart-rate monitor was the one who filled the silence in the room, reflecting her heart rate as she saw the solitary green line hop up regularly in tune to her heartbeat and the mechanical beep of the heart rate monitor as it displayed what she identified as her heart rate in large green numbers due to the heart-shaped symbol above it and the Beats Per Minute being shortened to BPM, the number beneath it displaying,
'70'.
The rest of the color-coded numbers and squiggly lines were all a mystery to the resting Shiratsuyu-Class destroyer, in part due to her exhaustion despite having woken up after resting in the hospital and her ignorance of medical terminologies and equipment.
She could see that its displays were blinking irregularly, LED lights adorning the machine situated beneath the heart-rate monitor as she saw some vials being connected to the machine via tubes while some of the wires were coupled to the machine, snaking up her bed and disappeared under the blanket as Shigure came to the conclusion that they were connected to her body, beneath the hospital gown she was likely wearing.
The blanket and bed were primarily white in color, and it only served to make her feel a little sick in the stomach, because contrary to what people wanted to believe, this was where the ships girls came after they had been dunked in the docks and after their conditions had stabilized somewhat to allow the Fairies and orderlies to check up on them.
So instead of the warm and welcoming atmosphere that it was going for with its white-dominant color scheme, it wasn't lost on anyone that this was instead a place of death, where countless dead or dying ship girls had been sent to in order to recover.
The hospital wards were privatized to disallow the ship girls from looking at each other's injured forms and become dispirited due to negative emotions being invoked over being thrown together in the same ward and were forced to see each other at their worst, this being damaging to their short-term psyche at best and disastrous to their long-term mental health at worst if unaddressed.
Shigure could remember the battle a little more clearly now, recalling the beating that she had suffered at the hands of the Ru-Class and understood that the impact of the Ru-Class's fists hitting her would cause her neck to suffer some damage due to the vertebrae snapping to the left and right constantly, and as the neck was a vital spot, they probably wanted to be thorough when repairing that area.
Her body was slowly booting back up, Shigure feeling the electricity course throughout her body and slowly regaining the feeling in her limbs as before this, she felt as if she had suffered complete spinal injury and only had control over her eyes and head before her body restarted itself.
She kept still for fear of disturbing anything as she saw the HUD on her screen run through some startup diagnostics and non-invasive physical evaluation tests while she saw countless paragraphs of undecipherable program lines fly upwards, the lines being projected onto an invisible wall in front of her as Shigure waited patiently for about a minute before the scrolling of program lines ended.
The screen before her showed a simplified diagram of her body, showing not only the affected areas of her body, but also the resulting damage to the skeletal system and internal organs along with what had been repaired in the docks.
The displayed time was 9.23 a.m..
The date was the 15th of April, year 2015.
Not surprisingly, Shigure could see that the internal bleeding, the damage to her face as well as her strained neck were amongst some of the more serious injuries that required a second, more thorough dip in the docks to fully heal, having been brought out of her critical condition after the first docking and had been brought here to make sure that there were no hiccups in the recovery process.
Shigure could understand that muscles and bones were easier to repair than the joints in her body, now feeling her body booting back up as she groggily tried to move around.
And promptly felt her body fail her as pain reverberated through her body and echoed in her tired bones, wincing at the ache in her joints and the receding numbness that plagued her face.
Moving, bad idea.
Got it.
She tried to look down at her blanket and attempted to bring her hand up to observe the bandaged wound, feeling resistance all throughout her body as though there were something that stretched across her body at various intervals to restrain her movements.
Shigure tried lifting up her head from the cushion to look down at her body, and saw out of the peripheral of her vision that her body was held down by thick and tightened rubber straps that were designed so that they wouldn't chafe when used for long periods of time, and they either stretched across the bed to restrain her body, or were directly wrapped around her wrists and ankles.
They sneaked up from underneath the bed and wrapped around her wrists and ankles to completely restrain her limbs, although it was adjustable to allow it to be used on different classes of ship girls.
Shigure sighed, giving up almost immediately as she knew that the restraints could withstand the strength of anyone up to a heavy cruiser, battleships, adult cruisers and carriers requiring the use of a straitjacket to effectively restrain their movements and negate their overwhelming physical strength.
Seeing that she was a ship girl that had defied orders due to her traumatic flashbacks, had acted on her own accord and died in an entirely preventable 'heroic' sacrifice, to say that she was unpredictable was quite an understatement.
It was no surprise if she was deemed too dangerous to be allowed to roam around due to her compromised mental state, and they had no choice but to resort to this method to prevent her from doing anything rash.
Shigure could feel that her hand was held still by a medical cast, and any attempts to move her fingers or her hand in general was met with heavy resistance from the material of the cast itself or a wave of pain that shot up her arm, Shigure learning to deal with the agony and take it in stride as she continued observing her surroundings.
Her bed was relatively well-made, with another steel cupboard positioned to the left of her bed and closer to where her head was, flanking the window as she didn't see anything remotely interesting about it and moved on.
The medical bed had a source of light above her, currently extinguished due to the ample sunlight that streamed in from the windows, the simple plastic curtains being tied up at the sides and arranged so that they wouldn't gather too much dust.
The railing of her medical bed wasn't propped up, and Shigure could see that her blanket failed to cover her entire body, spotting the medical blue hospital gown that she was wearing and finally noting that she wasn't wearing her underwear and bra, as they were likely seen as restrictive wear that might complicate matters if an emergency operation needed to be performed.
And finally, Shigure could see Akashi's signature bored face occupying the small window an instant before the door clicked open, the steel handle of the door swinging down like an executioner's blade before the door was pushed open by the repair ship, Shigure noting that the joints of the hospital door were regularly oiled to avoid disrupting the patient.
Akashi appeared in the doorway, her expression unreadable and betraying nothing as she quietly waltzed into the room, knowing the hospital like the back of her hand as she used her hand to close the door behind her.
And immediately locked it, effectively locking Shigure in with her.
Shigure's eyes were trained on her, the noticeable beep of the heart monitor increasing in frequency ever so slightly and betrayed her nervousness as she kept silent out of respect and fear of the repair ship.
Akashi walked over to her side where the chairs silently stood, the two ship girls never breaking eye contact with each other as the only sound that could be heard was the meek humming of the air-conditioner in the background and the mechanical beep of the heart rate monitor.
The repair ship finally broke eye contact and shuffled over to the chairs, plopping down as she looked at Shigure with an inquisitive, mysterious stare before piping up.
"I know that you couldn't help yourself, Shigure.
And I know…"
Akashi sighed again, Shigure wondering how much happiness had escaped the repair ship if she sighed as often as she did, and if the belief that a bit of happiness escaped every time you sighed was true.
But it didn't look as if the metaphorical loss affected her too much as she rested her cheek on her left fist while resting her elbow on the armrest to support her head as she continued in an attempt at a patient tone.
" … I know that you were thinking back to Surigao Strait."
Shigure wasn't so much shocked as she was interested to know how she deduced that, and said it as if it were a certainty.
But Akashi's next statement clarified matters as Akashi lifted her eyebrow, explaining herself and what she had done in the last three days.
"Well, when we brought you out of the docks after your first dip, we had to access your memory to gain information about the Flying Dutchman, so it was up to me to access your mind to observe the battle through your eyes.
I noted you calling out Fusou's name instead of Hiei's, so that's why."
Shigure lifted an eyebrow in acceptance and lamented her slip of the tongue as Akashi continued, seeing that the repair ship was trying to find the fine line between trying to reprimand her for her actions without breaking her already fragile psyche, sighing again before continuing.
"I can't blame you for trying to go back and trying to back your teammates up, because it was clear from my analysis that no matter how much we tried to help you, there will always some part of you that's haunted enough by your past to try and risk your life in battle to try and save your friends.
What I can fault you for, is attempting to throw your life away in a manner that's so sad, it's almost pathetic."
Akashi's voice became harsh upon finishing that sentence, and Shigure could see the repair ship's expression harden and winced at the repair ship's accusation as she respectfully listened to Akashi's mini-rant.
"I never expected this enemy vessel to pop up from the Mariana Trench, and I won't apologize for not predicting this turn of events.
The conditions were almost perfect for you to go into a mini-meltdown as you remembered the worst parts of your past and wanted to die changing something.
And for allowing you to sortie in conditions that would easily cause a trauma-induced anxiety attack while assuming that things wouldn't go to shit, I truly apologize for my oversight."
Akashi looked genuinely apologetic upon saying this, the repair ship lowering her eyes a little as Shigure saw the rare display of guilt in her mature green eyes.
"I may be a repair ship, but I am by no means a miracle worker.
It's a given that most ship girls need to resolve their past traumas to be able to handle the present ones, and the time needed to recover can last anywhere from a month to a decade.
I was certain that over time, experience in both sorties and life would help you mitigate the inevitable meltdown that would likely occur during a future sortie that may mirror the conditions of Surigao Strait.
This was one battle which I was on the fence about, but I decided to let you sortie after taking into account the fact that you'd be surrounded and protected by so many ship girls.
Apparently, it wasn't enough."
Her eyes hardened yet again, the warmth in her expression gone as her gaze bored into Shigure.
"But sacrificing yourself so that your teammates would run away?
Really?"
Shigure blinked in quick succession and tried to convince herself that she wasn't going to cry as she tried to explain herself to the repair ship, who was patiently waiting for her to respond.
"I… I…
I just wanted to save everyone!"
Shigure could hear the beep of her heart beat increasing in frequency, and she forced herself to take slow, deep breaths in order not to hyperventilate as she continued, remembering her turbulent train of thoughts.
"I thought…
That if they focused on killing me, my teammates would take the chance to escape, and that would be the end of that, you know?"
Akashi released her clenched fist and brought the tips of her fingers together in a thinking pose, crossing one leg over the other to use as a rest for her elbows as she contemplated Shigure's answer and finally concluded.
"So, you disobeyed an order to flee the battlefield while Hiei and Haruna held the fort and instead ran back into the thick of battle, yet want others to abandon you when you're being beaten to death.
Well, that's...
Contradictory."
Akashi then shifted her head to the side, acknowledging another possibility as to why Shigure was like this.
"Well, either that, or you're feeling entitled as fuck, thinking that you're the only one who's capable of saving people's lives, and possess hidden martyrdom tendencies within you.
Not entirely unexpected, of course…"
Shigure vehemently tried to shake her head in order to deny her senior's theory, as Akashi darkly and disbelievingly chuckled, almost mocking in tone as she counter-argued Shigure's silent denial.
"Oh really, Shigure?
Come on, dear.
An attempt at a heroic sacrifice, and then what, Shigure?
The Abyssals would certainly have been destroyed by the 3rd Fleet, but I can tell you right now, they were just as intent on disobeying your unspoken order for them to abandon you as you did theirs.
Let me tell you what your death would have changed, my dear.
Everything and nothing."
Akashi almost spat out the last sentence, and Shigure was shocked into silence by her venomous tone as Akashi slowly lowered her hands to hold onto the armrest and pushed herself up, all while her eyes slowly shifted from contemplating and brooding to hurt and downright accusatory as Akashi rose from her seat like a demon queen from her throne.
The light that shone in from the window opposite Akashi and illuminated her pinkish-red hair only served to cast shadows over her livid expression and truly made her look terrifying in the eyes of a frightened Shigure, who was strapped down helplessly to a medical bed and was locked in a hospital room with the furious repair ship.
Shigure tried her best to inch away from Akashi as she moved closer towards the trapped destroyer, outlining the futility of attempting such a senseless thing in the midst of a battle.
"Since your presence didn't change much, your death wouldn't have been any different.
The outcome of the battle wouldn't have been changed because of you since the whole battle was pretty one-sided in our favor after the Flying Dutchman left.
Because of that, it almost immediately invalidates the worth of your sacrifice.
It changes next to nothing about the battle, and you would have been better off saving yourself so that you could fight another day.
And I know that it ties back into your past, Shigure, and how you want to die and join those who had sunk around you.
But let me ask you, Shigure.
What closure would you have gotten from sinking again, knowing that the Nishimura Fleet is somewhere out there, alive and well?
Think of the family and friends whom you would leave behind, and think of the things that you will never get to do, all because you died like a dog out there on the battlefield when you could have lived."
Shigure flinched, unsure of how to respond to that.
Because no matter how much she disliked being a lucky ship that lived while others died, she did admit that sinking in the Battle of Mikura Jima Island would have left her unfulfilled, having never met the Nishimura Fleet in the present, never having spent more time with her friends and sisters and inadvertently leaving a hole in the 1st Fleet where she used to be.
But it was alright, right?
Everyone would just move on without her, right?
Akashi sadly shook her head as she seemed to predict Shigure's thoughts, the destroyer morbidly listening to the repair ship as she pointed out what was wrong with her way of thinking.
"You think everyone would just move on from your pointless death.
No, oh no.
Death causes more sadness, and it only serves to propagate despair and create more ship girls like you.
Oh yeah."
Shigure's eyes widened a little as Akashi dropped the truth on her, Akashi smiling sadly as she looked away and reminiscing about something or another as she continued.
"The thing about everyone's deaths was that they died because the Abyssals had overwhelmed them.
They died and sank either because they knew that there was no alternative left and wanted to make the most of their sacrifice, or the enemy was simply too fast and offed them before they could do anything."
Akashi's eyes hardened, locking back onto Shigure's gaze and caused the destroyer to sweat a little under her stare, trying not to wither under the repair ship's fierce gaze as Akashi slowly walked forward, the lighting on her body shifting ever so slightly to shroud her upper face in darkness as she leaned over the terrified destroyer.
"But how your death differed, was that you knew that you could have safely retreated.
Even when you saw how much stronger the 3rd Fleet was, even when Abukuma convinced you to retreat, you instead chose to defy yet another order to blindly charge into the battleships' battle.
Your sacrifice was completely pointless, and it was twofold.
One, the battle was already pretty much won, and you instead allowed them to try and claim a consolation prize by killing and potentially sinking you.
Two, your death could have been completely avoided if you had just believed that your teammates could handle themselves in a battle and left them behind, though not for the reasons that you think.
I know that you were suffering from severe traumatic flashbacks to Surigao Strait, and that's the one thing that makes all the difference between allowing you back on the ocean, albeit with added counselling sessions, and suspending you indefinitely with a restraining order that restricts you from coming within ten meters of a large body of water.
Along with more counselling sessions, of course.
And did you ever consider what your death would do to everyone else?"
Akashi's eyes softened as she leaned in a little closer, and although the anger was still reflected in her pupils, it was rather subdued when compared to the touch of disappointment reflected on her face as though Shigure had done something without any forethought, and Akashi was disappointed as she likely thought that Shigure was above that.
"They wouldn't simply move on.
Your death would haunt them, because not only was your death entirely preventable, but you failed to see your current teammates as being capable enough to step out of the shadow of your previous fleet."
Shigure blinked upon hearing that, slightly taken aback at how accurately that phase was used to describe her situation, how she couldn't help but see her old teammates in her current ones, and as a result, may never bring herself to trust them to handle themselves in unfavorable situations as she took it upon herself to save them, the Battle of Mikura Jima Island being a good case in point.
"I understand ship girl psychology pretty well, and I know that we just love to blame ourselves in so many little and irrational ways.
Remember what I said about your death propagating despair?"
Akashi's expression now softened even further as she looked down at Shigure, and for a second, what she saw really made her regret her actions that day.
Her face revealed her sadness within, and how the shadows on her face, instead of serving to make her scary in the eyes of the destroyer, now only seemed to make her look far older and wearier than she actually was.
The repair ship's expression was now melancholic as Shigure could easily identify the sadness that laid beneath her facade of boredom and indifference, and how Shigure, in trying to get closer to the repair ship, had instead almost caused her unbelievable pain and grief after threatening to leave so soon and break Akashi's heart even further.
Akashi's anger was now the equivalent of smoldering embers, barely recognizable as the repair ship allowed Shigure a peek into her broken heart and revealed a glimpse of the pain Shigure would have caused to her had she sunk that day.
To know that her own sinking would affect her friend in such an extreme manner only served to make Shigure feel worse, this sickening sensation of guilt overriding all other feelings in her heart as she wondered about how her friends and family would have taken the news.
There was no need for that as Akashi caught Shigure's attention before continuing, recalling a certain blinded Kongou-Class battleship that she had helped to write an After Action Report.
"Did you ever think about how Hiei would have felt about herself, had you truly sunk?"
Shigure's breath stopped as she drew in a deep breath, her eyes wordlessly asking about the condition of her teammate.
Akashi's regretful glance was the equivalent of a shrug, and was what caused Shigure to really take a mental step back and wonder,
What was she thinking the second she decided to give in to the Abyssal battleships' assault and potentially scar her teammate for life?
She remembered how ferociously Hiei fought to save her, and how the lack of Shigure's vitals, or worse still, how the lack of a body had the Abyssals sunk her would have broken Hiei's spirit, and like Akashi said, would have created a pit of despair in her defeated heart and would only serve to destroy Hiei from within, like what the sinking of the Nishimura Fleet, amongst others, did to Shigure.
Not only that, but in Hiei's (blinded) eyes, Shigure's death could have been prevented had Hiei been stronger so that she could alleviate Shigure's concerns that they would sink and would thus convince her not to come back for them.
Add that to the fact that her death may inadvertently cast a shadow on her teammates since Shigure was unable to distinguish them from the Nishimura Fleet in times of crisis, and senselessly threw her own life away when she could have easily lived.
This may cause the fast battleship to grieve over her death and similarly allow Shigure's death to weigh down on her for the rest of her life.
That wasn't even taking into account the effect that her sinking would have on her sisters, who would likely spend the rest of their lives trying to make sense of her meaningless death and grieve over her sinking that came too soon.
Shigure wanted to protect her friends, family and teammates, but it wasn't until now that she really thought about what her death would entail and the fallout that it would cause, even if it wasn't as important as a capital ship sinking.
But no.
To think that way was to make light of her relationship with her sisters and friends, not to mention her teammates.
She knew that every ship girl was important in their own unique way regardless of class, and gathering in this base and forming bonds with one another had intertwined their fates.
Every death, big or small, affected the lives of others around them to varying degrees.
The aftereffects of her sinking would have been unthinkable, having far-reaching consequences that Shigure couldn't even begin to predict as everyone would risk becoming a little more like her, blaming themselves in their minds and being haunted by the possibility that they could have done more to save her.
This was arguably even worse than what Shigure had been through, as she knew that at the Battle of Surigao Strait, had she stayed behind with her fleet, they would have all been wiped out, that much was certain.
At least there was a certain hopelessness that comforted her, knowing that there really was nothing she could have done in the face of vastly superior enemy firepower despite wanting to at least try.
But at the Battle of Mikura Jima Island, Shigure knew that the ship girls had the upper hand unlike the Nishimura Fleet's one-sided massacre, and if Shigure knew her teammates as well as she thought she did, her teammates would have heaped the blame on themselves without telling each other, forever wondering what else they could have done to save her.
Those seemingly hopeful thoughts would instead serve to haunt them forever in ways she couldn't imagine, and might instead drive them to become like her, or even worse as these poisonous thoughts risked turning hope into despair.
Shigure felt her vision start to water, and she tried to blink away the tears that were forming at the corners of her eyes as she considered the fallout that her sinking would have caused, stuttering and trying to respond as Akashi, the repair ship understanding what she was going through, allowed her the time to think about the consequences and patiently waited for her to respond.
"I-I'm sorry…
I-I didn't mean it…
I just wanted to save everyone…
I-I d-didn't think…"
But Akashi's eyes hardened upon hearing that, causing a tearing Shigure to flinch as she saw the repair ship lean in, face to face as she caught a slight whiff of scented shampoo that was used to hide the odor of blood that seemed to permeate Akashi's skin and uniform, no matter what she tried.
She chided as she stared into Shigure's widened pupils, locking gazes as she bluntly pointed out the thing that irked her the most.
"And that's the problem, Shigure.
You.
Didn't.
Think.
I knew that you were under the influence of your traumatic flashbacks.
There were few other ship girls that suffered like you did, and you had a perfectly reasonable explanation behind your actions.
You're young, inexperienced, had no idea of what to do in such a situation.
Your inexperience and your trauma got to you as you allowed the latter to dictate your actions and tried to do what was right by trying to back your friends up.
And that's why I forgive you."
Akashi rested her clenched left fist and forearm on Shigure's pillow as she sat on the edge of the hospital bed, leaning in above her as Shigure was forced to breathe in the slight stench of blood that she previously tried to ignore.
She couldn't look away as Akashi's empty eyes obstructed her vision, feeling as though Akashi's dull pupils bored into her unguarded soul and was capable of looking past all the excuses and lies.
"But your act of trying to sacrifice yourself is absolutely unforgivable.
Not even attempting to fight back, even more so.
If you sank while fulfilling a noble goal and go down fighting, that would be barely acceptable.
But you knew that letting them beat you up and sink you was more about making yourself feel a little better on the inside instead of achieving anything worthwhile, not considering the consequences it would have on your teammates and friends at that point in time.
Am I right to say that?"
Shigure lost the staring contest as she guiltily looked away from Akashi's intense stare and mumbled something incoherently, wanting to apologize for almost making a fatal mistake that she would have regretted down the road, feeling the trembling plague her entire body as Akashi, understanding Shigure's apologetic look, eased off the pressure.
Her murderous aura was jarringly turned off on the spot, almost as simple as flipping a switch in her mind as her eyes brightened and expressed genuine concern as she relaxed her left fist and brought it down to softly fix strands of Shigure's hair as she comforted Shigure.
"Now, now.
I understand that you're a bright and precocious little girl.
You tried to do what was right, and I can't blame you for that.
But you have to understand.
Dying for your teammates may not be as glorious as you think, because you will no longer be there to control the fallout that your sinking causes, something that I'm sure you would abhor."
Shigure tried to control her own breathing, doing her best to listen to Akashi's soothing words as the repair ship coddled her and tenderly wiped away her tears, understanding that her own death and sinking at Mikura Jima Island would have accomplished nothing other than momentarily distracting the Abyssals that were ultimately doomed at the hands of the 3rd Fleet.
Her death could have been prevented had she simply fought back or followed her seniors' orders to retreat, Akashi regarding her in a manner that one would towards a friend in need.
"I know that you simply wanted to protect your teammates and friends.
But you need to know that sinking when you could have been saved is pretty much the antithesis of what you stand for, Shigure.
You have friends and family to fight for now, and in this harsh world, that's all the reason you need to keep fighting on, hmm?"
Shigure nodded in a resigned tone, already worn-out from considering the possible consequences of her actions so early in the morning as she brought her ragged breathing under control and blinked away the tears that formed on the edge of her eyes in order to leave the whole thing behind her.
Akashi seemed satisfied with Shigure's answer, relaxing as she stepped back to pull her chair towards the bed in order to sit down next to Shigure, talking her through what was going to happen later.
"Well, after this, the Admiral will want to talk to you, since you're the one who was close enough to get a good look at the Flying Dutchman.
You're pretty smart and sharp for a destroyer, and the Admiral knows that she can trust you to be objective about your observations."
Shigure was a little confused as she looked over at Akashi, which, when considering her neck brace, meant looking at Akashi who was located in her peripheral vision as she asked innocently.
"But don't they already have my memories that were extracted from my mind?
If they have that, no offense, but why talk to me?"
She saw Akashi move out of the corner of her eye, assuming that she shrugged as Akashi spoke up, Shigure hearing her bored voice clearly as the repair ship clarified.
"Well, watching the battle through your eyes can only help us so much.
But knowing the Admiral, she may instead ask about your well-being and apologize for her screw-up.
You know what she's like."
Shigure tried her best to nod as she remembered what Admiral Mako was like, and wondered how things were like on her end as she knew that the world's governments and armed forces would go ballistic as they tried to make sense of the enemy's new technology.
The Abyssals probably wanted to draw the world's attention to the Flying Dutchman and make a strong first impression, and the only way to do that was via a show of extreme force to humiliate and crush a Combined Fleet in battle.
And that opportunity came at the Battle of Mikura Jima Island.
There, it took on and crushed several fleets at once, showing that it could surface and submerge wherever it desired, and right now, it seemed as if there was almost nothing the ship girls could do to stop the Flying Dutchman from accessing most of the world's major oceans.
To say that the world governments and armed forces would be fretting about this new Abyssal technology would be an understatement, everyone likely digging through their intelligence archives to try and connect any of the dots that were even remotely related to the Dutchman and prepare countermeasures to stand a chance against the Dutchman's overwhelming firepower.
And according to what she had read up on regarding the modern world, amongst some of the things that mankind had learnt to do extremely well was rebuilding, mass evacuations and quick recovery from massive assaults, having developed an impressive ability to recoup their losses, rebuild and help the economy stabilize and recover in an astoundingly short period of time, whichever country it may be.
She was confident that they'd find a way to counter this threat to some degree in order to make sure that it couldn't always do whatever it pleased.
She was just worried about other any other war machines that they may have created in the crushing depths, if they were able to conceal such a large construction project so easily.
Akashi continued, understanding Shigure's ability to keep up with these mature and complicated matters and shifting around slowly in her seat as the beep of the heart rate monitor became a steady rhythm that reflected Shigure's peaceful state.
"We may need on your input on some things, and being the ship girl who was at the epicenter of the disastrous sortie, I'm sure that the Admiral will want to check up on you.
And now that I've highlighted the simple fact that sinking yourself to make up for whatever asinine reasons you might have in mind rarely turns out the way you want it to, my job here is done.
I don't care if I had to say the cold, harsh truth to your face in order to make you wake up and accept this, as long as you take your own life a little more seriously out there, I don't care what you may think of me.
Besides, I feel that the world would spin a little faster if everyone were a little more honest with each other."
Shigure looked over at Akashi, ready to refute the point as she truly cared for her friend.
She may not know what Akashi had to go through to cause her to turn out like this, but she accepted Akashi as a friend because she knew that whatever happened to her, it had to be even worse than what Shigure had been through if seeing what Shigure experienced barely fazed her, and was mature enough to instead focus on Shigure's failed sacrifice, which was arguably the more important issue in this case.
"Akashi, I won't deny the fact that you may not be my nicest friend…"
She heard Akashi grunt in agreement.
" … but know that I never regretted being friends with you.
I wanted to be your friend because I knew that not only did I want to help you, but I also knew that you could see things in ways that I can't or won't, and you wouldn't hesitate to point things out to me should I err in my ways.
You may be direct and blunt with your words, but I would rather you point out something important than waste time skirting around the issue."
Another grunt from the repair ship, this time of affirmation as Akashi leaned in to look Shigure in the eye, propping her head up with her left forearm as she looked down at Shigure and addressed her, her tone being one of slight concern.
"And what I saw about you being a hypocrite, I would advise against it, as I know you pretty well from my interactions with you.
I know that the possibility exists where you ask others about their pasts and their woes, but when it comes to your friends and family asking you to share your thoughts and woes in times of crisis, you blue-ball them and cause them to see you as one.
And that's a big no-no, alright?"
Shigure's eyebrows furrowed as she considered what Akashi said, and it sounded like an all-too-real possibility, especially when she was down in the dumps after something bad had happened to her.
And the thing was that, it was at that moment when she needed all the help and support that her friends and family could offer, and pushing them away would only serve to sully their impression of her and see her as someone who refused to practice her own notion of sharing your woes, effectively making her a hypocrite.
Shigure lifted an eyebrow in agreement, replying.
"I understand.
I should be just open with others, just as I expect others to be."
"Well," Akashi added.
"It also helps that you're a newly constructed ship girl who's known for being polite and mature, and that you're only learning about their past."
Shigure gave Akashi a confused look, and Akashi waved her right hand in a sweeping gesture as she explained herself.
"Well, your innocence and curiosity allows you to learn more about them, and for some, it may be difficult for them to share their past with others.
But something that might be even harder for them to share is the present, and what they're feeling in the here and now.
The point where you know that you're really close to someone is when they actively seek you out and confide in you when they're in agony."
Shigure nodded sagely at that, understanding where Akashi was coming from.
The past, although it was a difficult thing for some to share, was ultimately something that had already happened, and it wouldn't change much even if they chose to share it with Shigure.
But right now, she wasn't so close to them to the point where she would be their first choice when they needed to find a shoulder to cry on.
This wasn't something that Shigure could control or force, but instead slowly build up over time as she got to know them better in the present, instead of asking about their pasts which had already come and gone.
Akashi's eyes met hers, and Shigure could see Akashi sharing a harsh truth of this world as Akashi continued.
"Everyone suffers, Shigure.
Destroyer, cruiser, carrier, battleship, we will all experience loss and pain at some point in our lives.
Do not believe that anyone, even the strongest battleships, can withstand adversity forever by themselves without eventually relying on someone else to shoulder the burden with them."
Shigure innocently blurted out.
"And what happened to those who tried?"
Akashi blinked, her eyes dulling and her smile drooping as Shigure instantly regretted asking such an insensitive question, but Akashi recovered faster than Shigure's heart could hit the floor as Akashi gave Shigure a genuine, forgiving smile as she reassured the distraught destroyer.
"I was a senior worker at the Ship Girl Institute of Mental Health, so take it from me when I say that I know it's a bad idea to keep it all in."
But a polite knock on the door was what interrupted their conversation and drew the attention of the two ship girls, and the door handle jiggled as whomever was on the other side of the door attempted to open the door that was previously locked by the repair ship.
And after a short while, Shigure heard what she assumed was a key being inserted into the door handle, and she could barely see the lock popping back into its original position as something was turned on the other side of the door.
The handle of the door was finally opened as it clicked, the handle of the door turning on its axis as it swung downwards.
The white peaked cap of the Admiral peeked through the opened door as Admiral Mako looked inside the room, spotting the two ship girls that were situated next to each other.
Akashi was positioned beside Shigure and was leaning towards her as the Shiratsuyu-Class destroyer was tied down to the bed, Admiral Mako blushing a little upon witnessing the sight before her and commented meekly.
"If the both of you are up to something kinky, do you mind if I sit and watch?"
Shigure blushed at her Admiral's words, the heart rate monitor reflecting her embarrassment as she started feeling her cheeks flush and her heart rate soar, the mechanical beeps conspicuously shooting up in frequency.
She stuttered as she tried to clarify the 'misunderstanding', but Akashi got off her chair as she scoffed, remarking on her Admiral's ability to see some sort of romantic undertone whenever a girl got close to another girl.
"Well, trust our lesbian Admiral to enjoy a bit of voyeurism whenever she sees two girls together."
Admiral Mako shrugged, entering the room as she removed her naval officer cap and tossed it onto the seat beside Akashi's as she retorted.
"Well, would you prefer I go by the saying, 'The more the merrier' and ask if I can join you two?"
Akashi shifted as she straightened up to reach her full height, conceding the point as she walked towards the Admiral and the door.
"Well, when you put it that way, I don't really have anything to say."
Akashi stopped as she looked back at Shigure, concluding their meeting by informing her.
"Maa, after this, we'll perform some physical evaluations in the afternoon as well as one last dip in the docks, and you'll be free to go before dinner.
But your fleet will take a longer time to recuperate since quite a few of them suffered complicated injuries, so don't expect to sortie anytime soon."
Shigure nodded solemnly as Akashi concluded their meeting by giving her a small nod before coolly turning back towards the Admiral and walking towards her in order to leave the room.
Akashi and Admiral Mako crossed paths and their eyes must have met, because Shigure saw Admiral Mako's expression harden for a second as she met Akashi's gaze, and Shigure swore that she saw the barest movement of the repair ship's head as Akashi nodded at her Admiral, having understood each other wordlessly as Akashi brushed shoulders with the Admiral and left, quietly closing the door behind her.
Admiral Mako then seemingly deflated, the energy sapped out of her in an instant as she collapsed into Akashi's seat, having picked up her cap prior to sitting down whilst facing Shigure's hospital bed, exhaling and allowing herself a moment's respite before addressing the hospitalized destroyer.
"Well, this is a royal clusterfuck the Abyssals have dumped on us.
It's got us tripping over ourselves trying to make sense of everything, trying to connect the dots wherever we see them in order to prepare ourselves for anything else they may throw at us.
But enough about this messed up world already.
How are you, Shigure?"
Admiral Mako looked towards Shigure, and she could see that the Admiral was tired from having to deal with angry superiors who demanded to know how things could have gotten so out of hand and how the Abyssals could have hidden the construction of such a large vessel from the world, to confused and grieving Admirals who wanted to know just what the hell happened to their ship girls for them to die and sink so easily.
But despite this, the Admiral showed that she was still concerned about her well-being, especially since Shigure was the one who survived the Flying Dutchman's assault and saved two other destroyers from the devastating cannon barrage.
Not only that, but Shigure had a traumatic flashback due to the various seemingly unrelated factors ultimately coming together to cause a relapse, driving her back into the battle as she risked her life to save her friends.
Shigure looked away from her Admiral's kind eyes, which were as different from the eyes of the repair ship that came before her as was heaven and hell, and although both of them were ultimately concerned for her, they expressed it in extremely different ways.
One was kind and warm, innocently wanting her to express her thoughts and woes candidly as she patiently waited and pushed all her worldly concerns aside just for her, while the other expressed her opinions on Shigure's views and choices without restraint and openly expressed her contempt whenever Shigure committed a fatal mistake, even more so when she did so without prior forethought.
Shigure decided to practice what she preached by talking to the Admiral about her troubles and express her opinion on the situation to get several things off of her chest.
"I…
I hated how things went south so quickly, and despite throwing myself back into the fray, I couldn't change anything.
And I know…"
Shigure clenched her right fist, her left hand being encased in the medical cast due to her injury as she cringed, thinking about all the ship girls that had either died or sank in the Battle of Mikura Jima Island, and how she wasn't strong enough to change the tide of the battle.
"I know that I can't change the tide of the battle by myself.
And yet…
When I threw myself at the Abyssals, I wanted to help them somehow, instead of running away like I always did!"
Shigure exhaled, conflicting emotions welling up within her again as she remembered the disastrous sortie, and how her teammates had dropped like flies around her.
She knew that there was pretty much nothing she could have done to help some of them, Shigure thinking back to the searchlights that blinded Junyou and the missiles that killed Tatsuta.
"I know that no matter who it may be, be it the strongest battleship or destroyer that replaced my position, they too, may have been unable to do much about the injuries that everyone sustained.
But if I were strong enough, I might have been able to stand with Hiei and Haruna on the battlefield and help repel the Abyssals.
So why…"
Shigure was now at a loss for words as to what to say next, because all these thoughts were running through her mind at the same time as she tried to make sense of it all, including her own actions which got her killed.
But a comforting hand was slowly placed on her clenched fist, which brought her attention back to the present as Admiral Mako, having scooched over while still being on her seat to sit right next to her bed, comforted her with a tired smile as the Admiral spoke.
"Shigure.
I can't ever say that I understand what you've been through, because I've never been on the battlefield or sailed a mile in your boat slippers.
But can I at least tell you how I see things from my perspective, in the hopes that it might help provide a second opinion?"
Shigure looked into the eyes of her Admiral, and she saw it.
Admiral Mako no longer possessed the playful demeanor that she used to address the younger ship girls in the base as Shigure saw that despite all the paperwork and backlash she had to endure from her superiors, she genuinely cared for them like a mother would for her children, but also understood the fact that Shigure was mature enough to discuss complex matters and thus used the appropriate tone to regard her while still expressing the same warmth and love.
Shigure smiled tiredly, doing her best to nod in order to allow her Admiral to speak, in which Admiral Mako's smile grew a fraction and served to brighten up her face as she looked away, still holding her fist as she began.
"I know that you're a precocious little destroyer, and that you're a veteran in World War 2, but you must never let that get to your head."
Admiral Mako looked back at Shigure, now losing the smile as her expression became a little more serious without becoming overtly sullen, her face inching closer towards Shigure as she continued.
"You are a newly built destroyer, and no ship girl can train herself up to be the super ship girl that you envision yourself to be in such a short time.
No one can!
This was only your second sortie, and you're still considered inexperienced when compared to everyone else.
You were unfortunate enough to be caught in this one-of-a-kind development, and you did what you thought was right.
And as to whether those actions were really right or wrong, that's up for debate, but still…"
Admiral Mako waved her free hand idly, as if to dismiss that last sentence before concluding.
"I don't blame you for doing what you did.
And all those thoughts of whether you could have done better or what you could have done differently?
Dismiss them, Shigure.
Beating yourself up mentally isn't going to change anything.
Instead, appreciate the present, look towards the future, and strive to improve and do better next time."
The Admiral then gripped Shigure's hand tighter, doing her best to drive the next point home as Admiral Mako looked into Shigure's eyes with concern.
"But also keep in mind that you have a duty to keep yourself in peak physical condition, lest you fall at a critical moment due to fatigue or some other silly reason.
And even when you fight to protect others, you shouldn't ignore your own health and make others worry about you by needlessly risking your own life, you hear me?"
Shigure nodded, understanding that their lives were all now closely intertwined due to their ability to interact with each other, and the loss of her life, even if it meant little to the base in terms of resources and manpower, would still cause repercussions that she may never truly see the end of.
Her teammates and sisters were the ones who were the closest to her, and she couldn't be so callous as to throw away her own life like she did at the Battle of Mikura Jima Island, because not only would she run the risk of adversely affecting her teammates.
Things would be worse for her sister ships, since they got to know her and watch her grow and mature, even if for a while, and would be the ones who were the most devastated by her sinking.
That thought alone was what scared her more than anything else in the world, being separated from them again and risk leaving them forever changed for the worse, even if it was to make it up to her dead teammates.
And like Akashi had bluntly pointed out, even if she sacrificed herself, she would never be able to bring her dead teammates back and would never be able to meet the Nishimura Fleet, made even worse by the fact that the Nishimura Fleet was back, and they were out there somewhere in this life.
She would only end up as nothing more than a statistic on an After Action Report, and would leave behind nothing but bitterness and loneliness in her wake.
Admiral Mako seemed satisfied with Shigure's answer and the newfound resolve in her eyes as she released Shigure's slackening fist, the Admiral leaning back in her chair in order to relax a little.
She understood that Shigure, damaged she may be, was smart enough to understand and learn from her mistakes after some thought and receiving second opinions from those around her.
Shigure looked over at her Admiral, and felt the restrictive neck brace resist her attempts as she asked Admiral Mako.
"Admiral, I have a question."
Admiral Mako was at attention as Shigure addressed her, crossing her legs and leaning in to listen to Shigure's question, the Shiratsuyu-Class destroyer wondering if it was alright to ask before asking anyway.
"I have a bit of a confession to make.
Before the operation, I wondered if you deemed us to be less valuable when compared to the 3rd Fleet and sent us out first as a result, but Ayanami told me that we had to trust you, otherwise the chain of command would fall apart.
I wonder, is it alright to doubt your orders?"
To Shigure's surprise, Admiral Mako looked a little relieved to hear that, and she placed her naval officer's cap on her lap as she answered.
"Oh, of course, my dear.
I'm not perfect, and I'm still capable of making mistakes."
Her eyes darkened and a shadow clouded her face as she continued.
"I just force myself to make less of them, because the lives of my dear ship girls are in my hands."
Shigure silently listened as she saw the Admiral lift her head up to look at Shigure again, feebly attempting a smile as she reassured Shigure.
"I understand if some of you might doubt me, and that's to be expected as some of you may have had less-than-stellar Admirals in the last war who made bad calls.
I've accepted it as par for the course to earn that trust by making the right choices and seriously considering all of your feedback and advice, even from those who disagree with me."
Admiral Mako looked away, seeming to reminisce on something as she continued.
"Well, I've discussed my own views and plans with those who disagreed with me, and sometimes I'd win, or they'd win, or we'd come to a compromise.
I actually welcome this, because even when I know what kind of base to create and what kind of ship girls I want to raise, I can't expect myself to be able to understand you all to the point where I can make all the right decisions for everyone.
Besides, I'm not the one who goes out on the battlefield, so you girls will definitely know certain things that I don't."
Her smile then grew a little, this time into one of a tired yet genuine smile that was like a warm light source, not blinding but was instead reassuring as she looked towards Shigure.
"I don't mind it so long as you remember to make valid points, Shigure, so don't hesitate to ask me anything, alright?"
Shigure nodded, asking her next question.
"About the Flying Dutchman, what is the world doing about it?"
Admiral Mako's smile now morphed into a contemplative look, thinking about things before answering Shigure as best she could without divulging classified information.
"Well, we're frantically trying to connect the dots and see what else the Abyssals are up to while preparing ourselves for a possible second strike, but we aren't exactly declaring a global Code Red or throwing up our hands and running around like headless chickens while waiting for the end.
Because I suspect that even though the Flying Dutchman is capable of more than it let on at the Battle of Mikura Jima Island, it can't be everywhere at once as it may likely be a one of a kind machine…"
"For now."
Shigure added, and Admiral Mako morbidly chuckled as she conceded the point.
" … Yes.
For now.
But it's far larger than anything the Abyssals have built so far.
And because of that, we can detect the damn thing the instant it comes within a certain distance of any naval installation around the world.
The only issues are our response time, trying to predict what else it can do, figuring out how to fight it and eventually, how to sink it if using conventional weapons isn't of much use."
Shigure raised an eyebrow at that, and Admiral Mako explained the situation.
"Well, one of the Dutchman's most powerful abilities is the ability to submerge at will, since it can scout and observe the battle before deciding to run interference.
So far, we can't seem to find any other way to deter its movements other than through naval mines."
Shigure interjected with a question, asking about possible human interference and support to back them up during battles.
"But what about the Japanese Air Force?
Surely we must have the air power to respond quickly when they attack?"
Admiral Mako sighed sadly, giving Shigure a exhausted smile as she corrected Shigure and pointed out a detail in the battle that she had been through.
"Not when it can pop up in bad weather, and at a convenient moment to mow us down like a sickle against wheat.
In adverse conditions, ship girls have to fight both the weather and the Abyssals, and even if we sortie all our JSDF destroyers to patrol the waters, it won't do any good if the Flying Dutchman can simply lay in wait like the shark in Jaws and slowly pick them off, if it even decides to engage them at all.
Right now, jet fighters may not be fast enough to intercept them as they have to be launched from the mainland, and it's suicidal for them to fly in bad weather while engaging the Dutchman."
Shigure thought about it, and eventually saw where her Admiral was coming from as the Admiral looked away at nothing in particular, lost in her thoughts about how to deal with this new development in the war.
The Flying Dutchman's diving speed was considered pretty fast, and any missiles fired from the JSDF destroyers would mean that it might be able to detect them at a distance and could either crash-dive to evade them or simply shoot them out of the sky.
Being underwater meant that it could scout out the enemy beforehand and decide if it wanted to participate in the battle.
At the Battle of Mikura Jima Island, it likely determined where to best strike the Combined Fleet, and the Flying Dutchman tanked everything the Combined Fleet threw at them, hitting hard and fleeing before reinforcements arrived.
If too many ship girls were present in battle, it might decide to flee the scene so as not to risk damaging the Flying Dutchman in a battle of battleships, where it knew that there was a chance of the Dutchman sustaining significant damage.
This way, the Abyssals could also drain their resources in a battle of attrition as they would waste more fuel sortieing more ship girls to prepare for a potential battle with the Dutchman that may never come to pass.
But Shigure was snapped out of her thoughts by the Admiral politely and softly calling her name, Admiral Mako asking someone who had seen the Dutchman's technology up close.
"Shigure, concerning the Dutchman's cannons and the torpedo-blocking technology, can you tell me a little more about them?"
Shigure blinked before registering the question and prepared to answer her superior, thinking back to the time when the destroyers had tried to escape the Flying Dutchman's cannons, and how Shigure had heard that the torpedoes that Kasumi had fired had no effect since some sort of underwater Abyssal swarm disrupted the torpedoes before they hit the hull of the Dutchman.
"Well, the cannons are life-sized and are capable of firing shells at high velocities that likely match our ship girl cannon counterparts, so unlike our downsized cannons which are suited more for ship-girl-to-Abyssal combat, the shells that hit us are far more destructive and lethal, since it's a large shell travelling at the same velocity.
The torpedo-blocking technology is something that I'm not too sure about, since there are different ways that it could operate."
Her face darkened as she continued, sharing her opinion about the new Abyssal torpedo-blocking technology which they currently had no way of countering.
"I thought about it, and there exists two possibilities.
One is that it dismantles the torpedo before it reaches its target, since it's movement is akin to that of a school of piranha gathering around a torpedo, and the possibility of the underwater swarm being able to attack the boat slippers of ship girls is unknown.
The second is that it might use its sheer numbers to gather around the tip of the torpedo, and if I understand the interior workings of a torpedo correctly, it might gather into a clump to fool the Abyssal-sensing sensors on the torpedo to think that it has already reached its target and trick it into detonating its warhead prematurely."
Admiral Mako nodded at the proposed theories concerning the working principle behind the new Abyssal technology, but Shigure was quick to put forth a disclaimer as she exclaimed.
"W-Well, it's just something that I thought up of off the top of my head, and…"
Admiral Mako raised a hand to stop Shigure, and her gaze pretty much summed up her 'Please stop talking' attitude as she corrected the Shiratsuyu-Class destroyer.
"Shigure.
I asked you for your opinion and ideas because I respect your intelligence, and know that you're smart enough to bring credible ideas to the table.
But something that grinds my gears is someone saying something smart, then backtracking as if they're embarrassed about their own intelligence.
And to that, I say, stop it."
Admiral Mako smiled as she looked at Shigure, her expression softening as she slowly got up from her chair to leave and continue performing her daily duties.
"Those were good ideas that you put forth, Shigure, and they'll be important in determining how we face off against the Flying Dutchman in the future."
Shigure wanted to apologize for that, but caught herself in time to stop herself, unsure of how to reply to that and finally settling on a sheepish smile.
Admiral Mako turned to leave, but caught herself in time to turn back and remind her of one last thing before leaving, a smile gracing her weary face as she looked down to meet her gaze.
"Oh, and I'd really appreciate it if you didn't throw yourself into another life-and-death situation, because your sisters, Shimakaze, Tenryuu, the 3rd Fleet and various other ship girls have been badgering me about your mental state and recovery.
There are people who are genuinely concerned about your survival and well-being, and I think that's enough of a reason for you to not off yourself, alright?"
Shigure made a remorseful face, realizing how close she'd been to inflicting the same pain and loneliness that she had felt onto her sisters and friends, Admiral Mako sighing one last time before slapping her Admiral cap back on her head whilst giving her one last aside smile before leaving quietly, leaving the contemplative Shiratsuyu-Class destroyer alone with her thoughts.
Admiral Mako strolled down the hospital hallway, inhaling and taking in the sanitized, well-conditioned cold air as she considered the situation at hand and what exactly was going on beneath the ocean.
The Abyssals were changing up the game.
Apocalypse, whatever it was, may well be in full effect after considering the fact that the amount of resources needed to craft the Flying Dutchman barely held a candle to the sheer amount of resources that had been used to create God-knows-what.
But the thing was that she might have an inkling of what they were up to.
She spotted a particular pink-haired repair ship waiting at the vending machine in the hospital's rest area, the squarish machine aglow with various canned drinks that were on display, one of which was in Akashi's hands as they noticed each other, nodded so as to acknowledge each other's presence and looked towards the steel bench that they both eventually sat down on.
Akashi took a sip of her drink as Admiral Mako dryly commented on the situation.
"Knew I'd find you here.
This is quite the conundrum, hmm?"
Akashi retorted, reminding the Admiral about the war in which they were currently embroiled in.
"If by that, you mean 'we're fucked everyday', I suppose so.
Today just marked the start of yet another five years of the Abyssals screwing us over by changing up the game again, so what's new anymore?"
Admiral Mako lifted an eyebrow to concede the point, asking Akashi as they made sure to sit on the bench that was furthest away from the hallway so that anyone who was passing by wouldn't accidentally overhear sensitive information.
"That's the problem, Akashi.
I think that the Abyssals' Apocalypse plan may be the 'Mud-skipper' scenario that we thought up of, in the wake of the Abyssal Blitzkrieg in '07."
Instead of being greeted by a typical reaction of surprise, the senior ship girl calmly considered the current situation and all of its known variables before responding without the usual sass that she used to address others.
"Hmm.
Abyssals coming onto land and attacking us directly?
Interesting."
Admiral Mako twisted her body to face the repair ship, concern and worry permeating her voice and was reflected in her eyes as she explained herself.
"Think about it!
They've done it in the past despite using their unwieldy ship cannons on land, which allowed them to pull off a successful assault on America despite suffering heavy casualties.
So, what if they've built the correct weapons and mass produced them to get the job done right this time?"
Akashi breathed out a little harder through her nose to pass as a sigh as she gave her Admiral a bored aside glance.
"Relax.
I said it was an interesting notion, not an impossible one.
The chances of what the Abyssals term 'Apocalypse' being the plans to carry out the code-named 'Mud-skipper' scenario coming true are growing higher and higher with every revelation.
And should the Abyssals come on land and possess enough firepower in the air, sea and sky to take on several countries at once, no force on heaven or earth is going to stop the inevitable World War 3.
They're prepared, they're cocky, and they believe they can win.
That's probably why they chose to usher in the next age of ship girl warfare with the Flying Dutchman at its vanguard instead of choosing to sneakily attack everyone simultaneously in a devastating first strike."
Admiral Mako's eyes widened before narrowing worriedly, a shadow forming on her face as she lowered her head to look at the ground and grumbled darkly.
"Fuck man, they knew that we probably wouldn't prepare any real countermeasures for a second land invasion that seemed less and less likely as time passes, and that's when they'll really strike.
We need to convince Central of this in order to get them to set aside resources and Fairies to build Anti-Abyssal weapons en masse and get the governments of the world up to date on this new development..."
"Stop."
Akashi silenced her Admiral with one word, and Admiral Mako looked up at Akashi's sharp eyes that reflected her concern as she pointed out.
"Remember.
Everything that have we proposed thus far are ultimately nothing but hunches.
Like you told the Coordinators and seniors, if you're too locked onto one particular theory, you may suffer from confirmation bias and only focus on certain facts that agree with your theory, and that's arguably hell of a lot more dangerous than anything the Abyssals are capable of cooking up.
Right now, we only have vague plans and receipts to indicate that something large is going on behind the scenes, and they could be building giant Gundams for all we know."
Admiral Mako snorted upon hearing that, her expression finally softening as she wearily conceded the point.
"Alright, alright, I know.
I need damning evidence to convince Central and the Japanese government about the 'Mud-skipper' scenario and 'Apocalypse' being true.
Otherwise, I'm just a fear-monger or doomsayer that those stuffy government officials want to avoid the most."
Akashi sighed, single-handedly crushing the steel can in her grasp and tossing it into the nearby trashcan without even glancing at it, sluggishly standing up as she put her hands in her pockets and asked in a bored tone.
"What do you need me to do?"
Admiral Mako looked up at her as she ordered her repair ship.
"The Flying Dutchman's attack has also sent the Abyssals scurrying about in a frenzy of activity, and one Abyssal Princess in particular has been spotted leaving her little island and has been press-ganging Abyssals left and right into her fleet amidst the chaos.
If she reaches anywhere near the Safety Zone, I want you to sortie with the 8th Fleet in order to stop her and interrogate her about 'Apocalypse'."
Akashi raised an eyebrow in acceptance and tilted her head, causing the white bandanna wrapped around her head to shift and swing as she acknowledged her Admiral's orders, clarifying.
"And about 'Psyche'?
Do we push that project forward?"
Admiral Mako considered the tempting possibility but eventually dismissed it with a simple shake of her head, remembering the uncomfortably low odds of survival as she added.
"No.
I don't want to needlessly jeopardize our girls' chances of surviving the procedure just yet.
Focus on the Princess, and then on Project Psyche with Aoba.
I'll focus on the upcoming large-scale battle and 'Apocalypse'.
Besides, the government and navy will understand the importance of submarines and naval mines after seeing the Dutchman in action, and will be more than willing to provide all the naval mines under the sun in order to protect our shores.
I suppose there's a silver lining after all, hmm?"
Akashi responded with a hmpf as she nodded and turned to leave, Admiral Mako pulling out her touch-phone to contact the Coordinators about the Flying Dutchman and get them to crunch some numbers.
Ooyodo's voice piped up on the other end of the line, her 'default secretary' voice chirping as she commented on the Admiral taking the occasional initiative to call her and get work done.
"Oh, Admiral?
It's a pleasant surprise to see you call me, instead of it being the other way around.
What is it this time?"
Admiral Mako's tone surprised even herself, ordering Ooyodo in a way that didn't allow for any rebuttal as she kept her volume down, seeing that she was using her phone in a hospital.
"Ooyodo, get the folder.
The 'Apocalypse' one."
She could barely hear Ooyodo inhaling sharply, the light cruiser having worked with Admiral Mako for roughly ten years and understood the Admiral's current tone to be no-nonsense and completely serious as she curtly replied.
"Yes, Admiral.
What would you like me to do with it?"
Admiral Mako slowly made herself comfortable on the steel bench while keeping an eye out for anyone that might overhear her as she ordered into the phone.
"You received the 1st Fleet's memory file from Akashi for inspection, right?
I want you to build a hypothetical model of The Flying Dutchman and determine if the amount of resources needed to create the Dutchman matches the amount of resources needed to build a Nagato-Class battleship.
And then, I want you to determine our odds of winning should the Abyssals utilize the resources detailed in 'Apocalypse' to develop and mass-produce human weapons for another land invasion."
Ooyodo's voice sounded steady, although after working with her for so long, Admiral Mako could discern various subtle signs of the secretary ship being unsettled by the order as Ooyodo asked.
"Admiral…
Do you think that the Abyssals have built Abyssal tanks and firearms without our knowledge?"
Mako chuckled at that, preparing to correct the Ooyodo-Class light cruiser as she shared her fears and felt the weight of the world on her shoulders.
"Oh Ooyodo, my dear.
I'm not just afraid of them building tanks, warships or even planes without our knowledge.
I'm afraid that those may not be the only things that they've built."