Note: I can act in writing? I was expecting more protestations after… Sigh. It's my own fault. Author is horrible, and apologises to anyone who didn't read the previous chapter on April Fool's Day. And hello, the word 'platonic'! I haven't used you in awhile.

"Such Sweet Sorrow"

Pepper had never understood her soul words. Who said 'Parting is such sweet sorrow' as their first words to her? Just in case it was during a performance of Romeo & Juliet, she went to as many shows as she could, until she had the damn play memorised. She even auditioned for an amateur production once, but she knew she was terrible at acting, and it was just as well that she didn't get in. The line was said to Romeo, by Juliet, and Pepper… she preferred men. Not that she'd care if her soulmate was female, though it didn't look like a woman's writing. She'd be happy to keep it platonic, if that was the case; her few 'experiments' in college didn't convert her to bisexuality, and non-platonic soulmates were meant to be compatible in bed, so…

And then Natalie Rushman was hurriedly introduced to her as Tony's new assistant, before the man from security rushed off again.

"Parting is such sweet sorrow," the redhead muttered to Pepper, giving her a sardonic smile.

"Those are my soul words!" Pepper said, her hands scrunching around the edge of the paperwork she was holding. Miss Rushman was an employee; this had the potential to be awkward. Until…

"Those aren't mine, though," was the reply. "And I know who my soulmate is. It's a platonic relationship. Not that you aren't attractive, but I wouldn't mix work with pleasure."

"Oh, thank God," Pepper said. "I-I mean, you're very attractive, too, but I wouldn't feel comfortable with it, either."

"You haven't found your soulmate?" Miss Rushman asked as they walked along.

"No, I haven't. You're the first person I've met who's said those words to me as a greeting."

Miss Rushman clearly thought back over her words, and she chuckled.

"I can see why," she said. "Sorry to get your hopes up."

"No, no. Don't be. Now I know at least one way they could be someone's first words to me. I hadn't been able to figure it out before, and now you've shown it's not a lost cause."

"You don't go to the theatre too much, do you?" Pepper ducked her head slightly, cheeks turning pink. "I've heard of worse plans."

"It's probably time to let Fate take its course," Pepper murmured.

"You'll find whoever it is. You have the mark to prove it."

It was some reassurance, and Pepper began to feel better about the whole day already.

Five years later, they were celebrating SHIELD's triumphant return, and a truce between certain governments who'd banded together to stop World War Three from erupting between Europe, the Middle East, and Egypt. People had been calling it World War Three, ignoring the actual wars between worlds which kept spilling over onto Midgard. (Admittedly, SHIELD squashed as many rumours and disasters as possible, but in a world with the 'information super highway', nothing truly remained hidden).

But this was a celebration Stark style. In other words, a huge party with all the trimmings, and Pepper's customary mild headache. Even with Phil Coulson's help she was still feeling the stress of so much preparation. World leaders weren't holding such big events, and they didn't have super-powered people present, either. Including those who'd fought certain guests such as Victor von Doom.

Latveria's ruler had chosen to start behaving himself. The country had flourished, and his agreement to host a branch of SHIELD in Latveria had seemed less sinister after he made it clear that he preferred to exercise his ambitious nature in making Latveria the premiere country of Eastern Europe.

He was going about it the right way, which Pepper would tell him if they ever met.

"Stop monopolising my time, Tony," she scolded. "Go talk to Bruce."

"He doesn't like spending time with me at parties," he said, pouting.

"Your soulmate is sensible," she said. "You're too much most of the time, and at parties you're just unbearable. Especially since you and Bruce are joined at the hip most of the time."

"Why, Miss Potts, have you been watching us?"

"Go, Tony," she said, nudging him away. "Schmooze with people."

"And try not to be myself," he said, and he rolled his eyes. "Got it."

Pepper noticed Victor von Doom approaching, and tugged her dress to make sure it was falling properly. She picked up a glass of champagne from a passing waiter for something to hold, and smiled at the ruler of Latveria. He nodded as he got closer, and she was about to step forward and offer her hand when someone ran over to Doom. He frowned at them, and Pepper couldn't help mirroring the action. She'd spent an hour trying to get to Doom, and now they were being interrupted before they could even talk.

"Sir, there has been a train crash near the border to Hungary," the man said.

"How bad?" Doom asked.

"At least ten bodies have been recovered, and it's anticipated that there'll be at least fifty more."

"When did this happen?"

"Only an hour ago."

He sighed. "Very well. I will go."

"Thank you, your honour."

Doom smiled half-heartedly at Pepper, and swiftly bowed over her hand.

"Parting is such sweet sorrow," he said. And then he walked off, leaving Pepper with her hand still in the air and her thoughts whirring.

She had to know. She had to say something. But he was leaving, almost out the door, and she was in heels. Natasha… Natasha was nearby. At Pepper's frantic gestures, she smoothly walked through the crowd.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Victor von Doom has just left," Pepper said.

"Did he say something to offend you?"

She swallowed. "It wasn't much of a conversation. He was summoned before it even began. All he had time to say was… 'Parting is such—"

"'Sweet sorrow'," Natasha concluded. Her composure had been rocked a bit, Pepper could tell. "Where is he going?"

"Back to Latveria. There's been a train wreck…"

"Pledge support to the Latverian government, whatever Stark Industries can do for them, even if it's just sending extra emergency crews or supplies," she said. "Do it now, while I organise transport."

"I don't know what to do, Natasha."

"What you always do. You'll stay in control and keep calm. Make the announcement. It gives you an excuse to leave so that you can make the arrangements. Then leave that to me as well."

"You're a life-saver."

"This isn't life-saving. It's just possible match-making."

"I still owe you."

"Yes. Yes, you do. Now go, Pepper. I'll find you when it's time."

Pepper nodded, and hurried off to interrupt the band, pulling up news feeds for Latveria on her phone so that she could get the most up-to-date information.

Victor's private plane was on the way back to Latveria. He sighed internally over another missed opportunity to speak to Pepper Potts. He'd long wished to meet the woman who was the face of Stark Industries. It was certainly a pretty face, attractive enough to keep his attention from straying further south (although that was still a great temptation).

"Sir?" the co-pilot called.

"Yes?" he asked irritably.

"There is another plane close by."

"What?" He looked out the window. Sure enough, there was a jet with a familiar logo flying alongside them. He raised his eyebrows. "Can you connect with them?"

"It's Miss Potts, sir."

Victor rose abruptly. Out of the window he could see the door on the side of the jet opening, and saw Pepper Potts there, in her dress but wearing a jacket. And combat boots. He blinked a few times, trying to see what was really happening, but no. The image remained the same. Baffled, he opened the side door of his plane and clung onto a strap.

"What are you doing?" he shouted.

Something shot out and attached itself just above the door. A line. Then Miss Potts was zipping across it, and Victor had to catch her. They almost fell to the floor, and he wondered whether he'd had too much champagne. Or whether this was an elaborate plot, perhaps by his enemies. Perhaps this wasn't the CEO of Stark Industries after all—

"I had to know whether it was you," she said, and she gasped for breath, clutching onto him. He led her away from the open door to a seat and stroked down her gale-swept hair.

"May I see your soulmark?" he asked, shaken by these developments.

"Did I say your words? Because you said mine."

"Yes, you did," he said. He could hardly believe it. Virginia Potts was his soulmate?

"Okay," she said. Then she reached behind her dress and… apparently undid whatever held it in place, because the front fell forward, baring her breasts and her stomach, with his writing curled around her navel. Victor had already removed his jacket and tie, so it was easy to unbutton his shirt and show her the corresponding mark.

"Is it yours?"

"Yes, it is," she said. He saw the tears in her eyes, but she was smiling. Then she launched forward, nearly knocking him over, and he wrapped his arms around her as they kissed. It was far from how he expected this evening to turn out, and so much better. He straightened up where he knelt, pushing her back into her seat, and their soulmarks hummed against each other where they were pressed. Victor was aware that they could very well start to bond, and he knew that he would prefer it to be in private, not while he was on his way to Latveria to address a crisis.

"Later, my pet," he murmured, pulling back. She whimpered, her hands squeezing his shoulders.

"We need to talk first," she said, although it sounded as though she was trying to convince herself more than him.

"You must return to your party," he said.

"No! No, I'm going to Latveria with you. I just… need to tell Natasha that—"

"Sir," the co-pilot said again, wisely remaining in place after closing the hatch. "Agent Romanov is requesting confirmation from Miss Potts that you and she are soulmates."

"We are," Pepper said.

"Yes, we are," Victor said, stroking her waist. "Now close the door between us. I wish to have privacy while I talk with my soulmate."

"Of course, sir." Then they were alone, without interruption. Victor noticed the Avengers Quinjet moving away again, but Pepper was far more interesting. He ran his hands up her sides to her breasts.

"No brassiere?" he inquired.

"Built into the dress," she said, her breath catching as he caressed her skin.

"How convenient," he said, and he bent his head to taste her.

"They're on TV," Bruce said, pointing. He'd dragged Tony home early, and fortunately the party had ended soon after. The sobering news of mounting numbers of bodies had dampened the spirits somewhat, and the rest of the evening had been spent discussing relief for Latveria and Hungary.

"Who?" Tony said, emerging from the en suite where he'd been brushing his teeth. He leaned down and kissed Bruce with minty-fresh breath.

"Pepper and Doom."

"Both?" Tony hopped onto the couch beside his soulmate, and burrowed into his side. Sure enough, Pepper was standing next to Doom, still in her dress from the evening but now wearing a fur. Faux fur, knowing her preferences.

"America will be giving all the support it can," Pepper was saying. "I've been talking the matter over with… Victor, and we've—"

"Wait, did she just use his first name?" Tony said incredulously. "That can't be right. I don't think they've ever even met before."

"Maybe she isn't sure how to address him?" Bruce suggested. "There's a lot of debate over it."

"Yeah, but this is Pepper. She wouldn't make a mistake like that."

"If we listen, maybe we'll find out."

"I'm texting Barton. He'll know, and he'll actually tell me, unlike Romanov."

"Tony, be quiet. Doom is speaking."

"…and my soulmate has assured me that Stark Industries will—"

"What?" Tony shrieked, nearly falling off the sofa. Bruce's eyes widened comically.

"Really?" he said.

"They… they can't be soulmates! Where's my phone? I'm calling Barton. No, screw that. JARVIS, whatever Clint's doing, tell him to stop, because this is more important."

"Tony—"

"Look at her, Bruce! It's true! Either that, or an elaborate lie. I mean, she goes to the theatre sometimes, but she's not… I don't know, Olivia de Havilland."

Pepper looked flustered, pushing her hair back behind her ears while her eyes were averted from the cameras. Doom wound an arm around her waist while he continued to speak, and Pepper actually leaned against him. One of her hands covered his, and she smiled up at him when he said her name. He smiled – smiled! – back at her.

Holy hell. That blush on her cheeks. That'd been there the whole time. It wasn't the cold weather of Eastern Europe. It was satisfaction. She was nearly glowing! There were comments from Twitter running along the bottom of the screen, both in Latverian and English, gossiping about Peppers Potts and Victor von Doom being soulmates, what this would mean for shares in Stark Industries.

Damn it. There'd be a board meeting about this in the morning.

"This is bad," Tony said.

"Not for Pepper," Bruce pointed out. "She's found her soulmate, and you and I both know how lonely she's been."

"But what if she leaves us, Brucey?"

"We'll carry on and be supportive. Besides, maybe they'll live separately?" Tony snorted. "Maybe Doom will visit us."

"…Crap. What'd I do in a past life to deserve this?"

Pairing requested by someone on AO3 who wasn't registered, and only left a dash sign as their 'name'. So… yeah. Can't really credit that, but anyway. I did my best.

I've never pulled an April Fool's Day joke before, not that I remember. Apparently I suck at it. You people are supportive, and make me feel absolutely despicable, because I thought there'd be stronger, more negative reactions! Good Lord, I prefer to write stories with chapters in multiples of five, and there are so many more pairings to fill! I don't know whether I should be flattered or offended that you believe I'd just drop this, one of the best things that's ever happened to me.

Please review, if you're not too pissed off.