I finally made my way out of the crystal lit cavern, only to find myself in what I could only assume was Tem Village. Figuring it was a good chance to take a break, I stopped in the shop. Looking at the very odd list of what Temmie had to offer, most of which was Temmie Flakes, I noticed the option to send Temmie to college, though it was very badly spelt. Counting the G I had gotten from a friendly bunch of monsters on my travels, I slid the 1000G foward, I gave her a friendly smile.
The Temmie flipped out, thanking me. I turned to leave, until I saw her return only moments later with a graduation cap. Befuddled, I watched as the Temmie added a new item to the list.
"Temy Armor?" I asked, quickly counting what I had left, "I'll be back for that."
And with that, I left the village, finally making my way through the caverns, finding myself at a bridge. Crossing it, I came to the monster child.
"Hey, um, Undyne told me you're the human everyone's been looking for. So, uh, I guess that makes us enemies?" he spoke.
"And why is that?" I asked, crouching to get eye level with him.
"Well, uh, I don't know? I guess monsters and humans just can't be friends?" he asked.
"I don't see why it has to be that way, dear. Humans and monsters can get along. I believe it in my heart," I smiled, petting his head.
"You really think so?" he looked at me with bright eyes.
"I know so," I gave a gentle laugh.
"Yeah! Well, I better get going! My parents are probably worried sick!" he grinned
"I can guarantee you they are," I nodded, letting him pass me.
I started east again until I heard a yell. Turning, I felt my heart jump to my throat. The kid had tripped and was barely hanging onto the edge of the bridge. And of course at the end of the bridge, Undyne stepped up. Ignoring the armor clad killer, I sprinted to the monster boy and helped him back up.
"Are you okay?" I asked, checking him.
"Y-yeah. I'm fine," he nodded before turning to Undyne, "Hey! Leave her alone! Lyla is really awesome and kind!"
Undyne stood there for a moment before turning and leaving. My heart pounded in my ears.
"Please go home to your parents," I said, petting the head of the monster boy.
With a nod, he headed back west towards Snowdin. Giving myself a moment to get my heart to calm down, I took a deep breath and headed east. I seemed to be clear of Undyne for the moment. Or so I thought…
"HEY!" shouted a voice from the top of a cavern.
Removing her helmet, it was Undyne. She was actually quite pretty, dark blue scales and a long red ponytail. I listened patiently as she went on a small monologue.
"GET READY!" she shouted, jumping down and attacking me.
Barely dodging her attack, she waved her spear and I glowed green. With the green came a shield on my right arm.
"Fascinating," I muttered, shooting up and blocking the onslaught of spears thrown at me with the shield.
"Very good, but I won't go easy on you from here!" Undyne smirked, throwing more spears at me.
Blocking them, one after another, I grew slightly frustrated, "Damnit, Undyne! I don't want to fight you!"
It didn't do anything of course as she continued to plummet me with arrows.
"UNDYNE! We can be FRIENDS!" I shouted at her as I dodged another round of attacks.
The attacks stopped for a moment and Undyne seemed to have been struck by what I said as I suddenly turned normal again. Taking the opportunity I sprinted past her, running away. I had a deep feeling I wasn't going to be able to beat her, not that I wanted to, but I had a deeper feeling she wasn't going to give up so easily. Every time she would capture me, before she could turn me green again, I'd slip away and run. Suddenly, though, I was boiling in my sweater. Looking around, I saw Sans at a sentry station, and ahead of that was a bridge overhanging lava.
"Well that explains the heat," I huffed, trying to keep my speed despite feeling overheated, "Hey Sans!" I called as I ran past him, though he seemed to be asleep.
Finally past the bridge, I noticed a water cooler. Water sounded fantastic right now... I started feeling light headed. Hearing the heavy footsteps of Undyne behind me, I turned and watched as she approached me.
"Armor...too…hot…"she huffed, falling at my feet from heat exhaustion.
"Shit," I cursed, quickly getting two cups of water from the weird water cooler.
Chugging one on my way over to her, I kneeled down and carefully helped her drink from the other cup. She seemed to bounce back pretty quickly. Standing, she stared at me dead in the eyes for a good long minute before turning away.
Suddenly, my phone rang, playing the Sailor Moon theme song instrumental. It was Papyrus. Sliding my thumb across the screen, I brought it to my ear.
"Hey! Lyla, I was thinking! You, me, and Undyne should get together some time! It'll be fun!" he said, and before I could reject, he hung up.
I couldn't help but laugh at that. Clicking my phone closed I shoved it back into my pocket and headed deeper into the lava hell. Soon a large lab came into view, and seeing as two large guards were blocking my path I decided it was probably best to try out the lab.
As I approached the lab, though, I noticed a path leading south. Though going east had proven to be the way to go, I figured it wouldn't hurt to try the southern route. It led me to a river where a hooded figure stood on a strange boat.
The figure, in a bit of a melodic tone, asked if I wanted to go anywhere with them. This made me think back to Papyrus saying I should hang with him and Undyne.
"I must be crazy," I laughed slightly at myself before accepting the invitation from the hooded stranger.
Showing up in Waterfall, I headed towards Undyne's house, remembering Napstablook having mentioned her being his neighbor at one point. Papyrus was waiting patiently outside the large fishlike house.
"Hey," I smiled at him as I approached.
"Ah! You made it! Here, give her this! She loves these," Papyrus handed me a golden colored bone.
"Uh, okay," I nodded and before I knew it, I was in Undyne's house and Papyrus had jumped out the window.
After a little chaos, I was now sitting, drinking some tea while Undyne talked.
"I guess if you wanna go home you can always just ask Asgore," she said.
"Wait, what? I don't want to go home! I want to make this place like a home for me and my brother, Frisk…or that was the plan. I've talked to so many monsters and…Undyne, is the overcrowding really that bad?" I asked, fidgeting with the cup.
"Brother? Hm...yeah, it's pretty bad. And we've never seen the sun before, which sucks. We just have the fake lighting from the crystals above," Undyne nodded.
"Oh. Hey, Undyne…maybe I won't try to stop Asgore's plan, I don't know…but I do know I don't want a war against the humans to start. I've seen war. It's…it's not good. It's just death and destruction. If I can help Asgore break the barrier, I will, but I don't want a monster on human war starting, okay?" I looked from my cup and back up to Undyne.
"Huh, alright, Human. That sounds like a plan," she nodded.
"Cool. Oh, and my name is Lyla," I smiled softly.
"Hey, can I ask you a question now?" Undyne asked.
"Go for it," I nodded.
"Are you a knight of some sort?"
Her question caught me off guard a bit.
"Uh, yeah, I guess. Up there, we use the word soldier. I was a member of a branch of the human military called the Air Force…I was forced to retire though, after I had a mental breakdown when Frisk went missing. After my life fell apart I decided to find him, starting at the mountain where we would play, before I left to join said air force…and well, that's how I ended up here," I looked back down at my cup, "I want a good life for Frisk. He's more important to me than anything, even myself."
Looking back up, Undyne seemed to be in shock. She muttered something about Papyrus before jumping up and yelling something about his training and how I'd have to take his place. Next thing I know we're standing outside her house as it burns to the ground.
"So if you need me, just call Papyrus," she said before leaving.
Staring at the house in shock, I took a minute before pulling myself away.
"This has been one hell of an adventure," I muttered before going back to the cloaked figure and having him take me back to Hotland.
Once there, I went into the lab. The lights were off and it was difficult for my eyes to adjust. As I passed the only source of light, a large screen, I felt my feet come to a halt. Looking up at the screen, I felt thoroughly creeped out; up on the screen was me, in real time.
"That's just wrong," I frowned, continuing out of the lab as quickly as I could, only to come to another halt as a figure exited a room and clicked on the lights.
Before me was a short, yellow dinosaur. As soon as she saw me, she became flustered, muttering to herself about how she wasn't prepared. Once she calmed herself, she introduced herself as Alphys and started gushing about how she had followed me on my adventures through the underground, watching me on the screen and cheering me on. I was thoroughly disturbed by this, but did my best to stay polite. She then told me about a robot she invented, my gut tightening as she explained how it had malfunctioned and became a killing machine. Suddenly, there was a series of loud bangs that shook the room.
"Shit," I cursed as a boxlike robot burst through the wall.
"Hellooooo~ ladies and gentlemen! And welcome to today's quiz show!" he announced, the lights on him flashing excitedly.
"Oh double shit," I cursed again.
"Now now, watch your language. This is a family show," the robot, Mettaton, scolded.
"Eat a dick," I hissed.
Despite his lack of a face, I could feel Mettaton glaring at me before continuing on with the show. I answered all the questions, some on my own, but most with the help of Alphys, who signaled to me the answers with her hands. Mettaton seemed to catch on though as he asked a strange question about some anime, sending Alphys into a frantic gushing about it. I couldn't help but sigh in heavy annoyance.
"Last question; who does Alphys have a crush on?" Mettaton asked and listed off the options.
I looked at Alphys for a moment before blurting out, "Undyne…you like Undyne? Can't blame you there. I always had a thing for strong chicks too."
This threw Alphys into an embarrassed fit, hiding her face as Mettaton lowkey mocked her. I kinda felt bad for her at this point.
"Hey, leave her alone," I stepped towards the robot, "So she has a crush? So what? Everyone gets those at some point in their life. You know, unless they're too self-involved to notice anyone else around them."
Once again, I felt that if he could, Mettaton would be glaring daggers at me. Hugging the reptilian scientist, I gently comforted her as she tried to regain herself.
"Well, that's all the time we have, folks! But remember, this is just the pilot and there's much more ahead! Drama! Romance! BLOODSHED! Stay tuned!" Mettaton said, keeping his gameshow persona going before flying off.
"This place is a madhouse," I muttered as he broke through the ceiling.
Turning my attention back to Alphys, I gave her a gentle smile, which she returned.
"Um, here, let me give you my number," she said.
I handed her my phone, a little iPhone4, which she immediately gasped at, calling it outdated, before leaving with it. When she came back, it certainly looked sleeker and updated, but I felt slightly invaded. I loved my phone…
"Um, thanks. Hey, before I leave, do you have somewhere I can change out of this sweater?" I asked.
"Uh, um, sure, you can use the upstairs," Alphys nodded.
Nodding myself, I went up the escalator and slipped into the corner, taking off my sweater and my sweat-soaked compression sports bra. My chest wasn't going to be happy with me without some sort of support, but I wans't going to walk around with a sweaty bra on. I'd chafe! Replacing my undershirt and my jacket, I wadded up my sweater and bra together, trying to decide what to do with them. Heading down the escalator on the other side, I walked up to Alphys.
"Hey, I'm not sure what to do with this?" I said, feeling a bit awkward.
"Oh, um, I'll put it in my hamper and wash it for you, um, for n-next time you visit?" Alphys offered.
"Uh, sure," I nodded, handing them to her before leaving the lab.
Once out, my phone started blowing up with updates from Alphys on that social site she signed me up for.
"This better not use up data…and I better not get roaming charges! Fuck!" I groaned, just realizing that being underground may not be covered?
With a sigh, I continued on, solving the puzzles with relative ease, Alphys lending her hand where she could. Before I knew it, I was in pitch black darkness.
"Don't worry, I'll turn on the lights!" Alphys said.
"Thanks," I responded before hanging up.
Soon the lights were on and I…was in a kitchen? No. It was the set of a cooking show, and next to me was Mettaton in a chef hat. Okay, I could do this. Mom had always said if I weren't such a screw-up I'd have made an excellent housewife…I really didn't take that as a compliment, but it was the closest I ever got.
"Assistant, please get me the ingredients for our cake! We need milk, eggs, and sugar," Mettaton instructed.
"That all? What about the flour? And what kinda cake are we making anyway? Yellow? Chocolate? Red velvet? Do you even know what you're doing?" I questioned immediately.
"Uh, um," Mettaton seemed taken aback by my outburst.
"You know what, I'm the star now, since you don't know shit. Assistant, we're going to need eggs, sugar, milk, flour, shortening, baking powder, salt, and vanilla extract," I said, grabbing the apron hanging from the wall and putting it on.
"Wh-WHAT!? You are not the star, I am," Mettaton looked like he was going to blow a circuit.
"Your viewers are waiting, Mettaton. They want to know how to bake a cake, not a disappointment like you were planning," hands on my hips, I watched as the robot quickly gathered the ingredients.
"Okay, lovelies, today we're making a simple yellow cake. First, preheat your oven to 350 degrees Fahrenheit…" I went on to bake a cake, all from memory.
Once the cake was in the oven, a befuddled Mettaton finally spoke up.
"Yes, well, we were going to make human cake," he said.
"Cake doesn't have flesh in it. If you wanted that you should've made something like a shepherd's pie," I said, taking off the apron and handing it to him, "Now if you will excuse me, I got shit to do. I already set the timer for 40 minutes. Take it out and let it cool before removing it from the pan and icing it."