"Reawakened"

2012

Natasha Romanov could not afford to get drunk. As in she literally did not have sufficient funds for the amount of liquor required to intoxicate her. And there was no way she was giving Stark the opportunity to test her limits by opening half the bars in New York to her. 'For science', he would no doubt say, and she questioned whether Dr. Banner would be any good at dissuading him. Unlikely.

The reason that Natasha was considering this… was her soulmark. She'd received two new ones within a week of the battle of New York, perhaps one right after the Hulk jumped ship. The other was a handful of days later, an itch during the night that had her tossing and turning until she woke.

It was in Coulson's writing, or something very like it. Which was why she was sitting at a window in the middle of the night, staring out unseeing at the stars and hoping that it wasn't Phil Coulson's handwriting. Because that would mean another of Fury's lies, and SHIELD was home. Not Stark Tower, no matter what Stark had planned. SHIELD was home and family and friends all in one, and while she may never trust any of them fully – except Barton – she had to believe that Fury would never keep her from her soulmate if it was Coulson.

If he'd somehow survived, coded, then survived again, bringing on a new soulmark… and if they were each other's soulmate, not one-sided… and he definitely knew her writing… If he didn't approach Natasha first, she would either have to assume that her soulmate was a stranger, or that Coulson didn't want her and the red in her ledger, and was avoiding them for that reason.

'What brings you here?' In his writing.

Her other mark said 'I recognise you from somewhere.' It was a more feminine hand, which made Natasha nervous. She'd only ever been involved with men. Both marks were equally dark, meaning it was supposed to be a non-platonic relationship. With a woman? Natasha had never considered that.

She had never had a soulmark until this week, and now she had two of them. Was it Coulson's cellist, or someone else? Who was it, if Coulson wasn't their third?

Natasha rested her forehead against the cold glass of the window, her gentle breaths creating a mild fog on the surface.

"Agent Romanov, are you unwell?" JARVIS asked softly.

"My first soulmarks," she told him. "Two of them this week. I wonder if the third one is free?"

She didn't know whether it was impressive or creepy that Stark had included laugh capability in the AI running his life.

"Congratulations, Agent Romanov," he said after a brief chuckle. Natasha stared at the ceiling. "Would you prefer to keep this between ourselves?"

"…For now," she said. "I'll probably tell Barton, but not yet. Don't let him fool you into telling him, either."

"I promise, Agent Romanov. Your secret is safe with me."

She returned to her introspection until slivers of dawn appeared. Time to exercise.

Audrey's soulmark never really faded, even when a new one formed. That's why it took her a few days to accept Phil's death; the mark was pale, but still there, at least if you studied it with a magnifying glass in a certain light and dried your eyes first.

It was a hell of a shock when she checked it again one night and saw the words as dark as before, like they'd never faded at all. There was no pain accompanying their formation, not like when she received her new mark.

'You need to come with me.'

Sounded like another SHIELD agent, to be honest. Could Audrey do that? Go with another SHIELD agent and forget what Phil meant to her? And what if, somehow, he was still alive? Maybe he'd been in intensive care at first, on the brink of death, but they revived him? Any day now, surely, they'd call to say that he was fine, that they were sorry about lying but they didn't want to get her hopes up.

If that was the case, why the speedy memorial service Fury had set up? No, there was some kind of mistake. Or it was a cover-up. That had to be it! Audrey didn't know how many people had known they were soulmates, and if Phil had to go into witness protection surely they'd have sent her as well?

So she waited. And played with the orchestra. And waited some more.

No one ever called.

Phil had given Audrey an out by not revealing that he was still alive. Prolonged contact increased the risk to her, and he couldn't allow that. Plenty of people got by without their soulmates, and surely his death had wiped her soulmark off? Not from him, obviously, but then again it was up to him to make the first contact, and he had no intention of putting her in further danger.

So his original soulmark remained dark. It was the other soulmark which gave him additional pause. 'Explain yourself.'

He'd known the Black Widow's writing anywhere.

Maybe he should've told Fury as soon as he noticed, but surely the director saw it himself? Either way, he was put on a different team. If he revealed himself to the Avengers now, it would only be fair to tell Audrey that he was alive, and she'd be at risk again from past enemies. Just because her stalker was behind bars in a SHIELD facility didn't mean that she wasn't…

Although Natasha Romanov would make an excellent bodyguard.

Phil shook his head, chastising himself for the thought. He'd known Natasha a long time, certainly found her aesthetically pleasing – who didn't? – but she never showed interest in having a relationship with anyone, long- or short-term. He was fond of her, yes, so it was reprehensible that he could consider 'arranging' for them to meet so that Audrey would be adequately protected when Phil revealed himself.

Hell, Natasha had more enemies than he did, most likely, which would put Audrey in even more danger.

So he kept his resurrection quiet. His soulmates could be used as leverage against him, and he couldn't be as impartial about them as he could be about his team. He didn't want to put Audrey in danger, and he didn't want Natasha ever to be in a position where she put her job ahead of her soulmates. She could carry that guilt to her grave, and she didn't deserve that.

As for Phil, he could only hope that they would all be retired from their respective jobs before they met.

2015

Natasha was attending the ballet for reconnaissance, not to enjoy herself. She could appreciate the skill and hard work of the dancers, the beauty of the music, but she could not ignore the threats inside the theatre. HYDRA agents, looking for Barnes.

More fool them. He was at the new Avengers base with Rogers and Wilson. With Barton back at the farm helping with the new baby (and continuing renovations) there was no one for Natasha to drag along with her. As soon as she heard about HYDRA agents looking for a man, she knew that it was important, and that they most likely had a trail on Barnes. When she followed them, however, she was led to a concert hall, and now she was wondering what their game was.

"I didn't realise she was in the orchestra!" one of the men hissed to another at interval. Natasha had changed her hairstyle again, dark on top and blonde underneath, and she was squinting at the name plate on a landscape. Weren't they after Barnes? A man, at least?

"And he isn't here," another said.

"We don't need him to be here, we just need his soulmate as bait."

Natasha new that pretending to be short-sighted was a bit of a cheap trick, but it usually worked. She buried her face in the programme and looked at the orchestra list, hoping to pick out a familiar name. Portland Philharmonic…

Portland.

Portland?

There it was. Audrey Nathan. She sidled closer, heaving an aggravated sigh behind the programme before turning her back and peering at another painting. The HYDRA agents were still talking.

"Ward doesn't want Coulson to find out the danger in advance like last time," the first one said. "We grab the cellist when she's leaving afterwards, so she won't be missed until tomorrow. Go stake out the exits. Surveillance ain't gonna be enough if SHIELD finds us first."

The others grumbled as they left, and the first guy went to the restroom. Natasha knew that if they had surveillance outside, any outgoing messages might be detected, causing them to act early. Even a coded message might be suspicious, and Barton was too far away to be of any help. JARVIS might've been useful, but now that he was mostly gone Natasha had to get used to the new AI, and didn't want to rely on a virtual (on more than one level) stranger.

The simplest thing to do was swap seats with a woman who was more than happy with the better position, so much so that she didn't question Natasha's lame explanation of wanting to appreciate the performance from a different angle. The orchestra played for the curtain calls, and Natasha was out before the leads made it as far as the stage. She'd already looked up the escape plans of the theatre beforehand, and was easily able to find the orchestra.

Coulson once showed her and Barton a picture of the cellist, making it child's play to pick her out. Natasha waited in the shadows until Audrey had packed up, and then darted to her side.

"You need to come with me," she said without preamble. She swiftly hauled up the cello – it was heavier than she'd imagined – and steered Audrey from the obvious doors. The cellist moved around to Natasha's other side and tried to take the handle of the case.

"I recognise you from somewhere," she said. When the words hit Natasha, she nearly dropped the cello, saved by Audrey gripping the handle beside her. She met the woman's eyes and swallowed.

"Oh," she said.

"Maybe we should take this someplace else?" Audrey suggested. Natasha nodded, and insisted on carrying the cello.

"We need to hurry, because there are men after you," she said. "It's why I'm here."

"Did Phil send you?"

"He's alive?" Natasha asked sharply. "How did you find out?"

"His mark never disappeared," Audrey said. "It just faded for a few days. I do know you from somewhere, don't I? The hair doesn't seem right, but—"

"I'm Natasha Romanov."

"…The Black Widow?" she hissed. "You're my soulmate?"

"At least you've confirmed my suspicion that Phil's alive, considering I never had any marks until yours appeared, and then his a few days after. I recognised the writing, but he never made contact."

"I'm not a hundred percent sure," Audrey said. "But the mark is clear. And when my stalker returned for me, I could've sworn Phil was there with SHIELD. I was knocked out, and I thought he spoke to me, but then he was gone before I reawakened properly."

"It seems he is alive, if the conversation I overhead tonight is anything to go by," Natasha said.

"I wonder if he thought he was protecting me by staying away."

"Or both of us. Protecting you from both of us." Natasha grimaced when Audrey gasped. "He didn't tell you anything of my history?"

"All I know is that you're an Avenger who once worked for SHIELD, and that you're our soulmate. That's good enough for me."

"Great." Natasha glanced left to right. "Now let's get out of here before the bad guys catch us, alright?"

"Are your plans usually this… detailed?" Audrey said, raising her eyebrows.

"Oh no," she said. "Sometimes I have to improvise."

Phil wasn't expecting the angry call from Barton. Or Rogers. Or Stark. Or Pepper. After all that, he definitely expected an angry call from Romanov.

And he did. It just wasn't over the phone.

"What brings you here?" was all he had time for before Natasha slapped him across the face. He rubbed the aching spot as she glared at him.

"Explain yourself," she said.

So it was her writing.

"It seemed safer," he said. "For all of us."

"Including me?" came a familiar voice. Phil looked around Natasha and took in Audrey's beloved face. He smiled, unable to help himself, and his cellist flew forward into his arms, smothering his face with kisses.

"Hi," he said, proud that he managed that much in a steady voice. He met Natasha's eyes. "I gather you two have met?"

"Saving her from HYDRA," she said. "Some guy named Ward… not Grant Ward?"

"Yes."

"What?" Audrey said, trying to pull back. Phil wouldn't let her out of his arms.

"He turned out to be HYDRA," he said. "Now he's in charge of it. We thought we'd squashed them, but sometimes their motto seems a little too apt."

"HYDRA wanted to use her as bait," Romanov continued. "You're lucky I tailed them, thinking they were after Barnes."

"Thank you," Phil said. "Though you realise it was Fate, not luck, right?"

"I don't know how much I trust Fate," she said. Audrey turned her head, while still clinging onto Phil's jacket.

"We still haven't talked about the fact that we're soulmates," she said. Phil noticed Natasha's shoulders move a quarter of an inch down in a silent sigh.

"Do you think it's a good idea?" she asked.

"I lost my chance to bond with Phil once, and I'm not losing it again, if he'll have me," Audrey said.

"This life is dangerous—" he began.

"And look what happened when you weren't around!" she said. "Now that people know I'm associated with you they'll keep coming after me. At least if we bonded you'd know where I was if I went missing. People don't die as a consequence of their soulmates dying, so don't try that excuse. Assign me a personal bodyguard if it makes you feel better!"

"Maybe that's what Fate intends me to be," Natasha said.

Phil remembered considering that himself, and found it hard to meet Natasha's eyes as Audrey protested loudly.

"At the very least she could teach you self-defence," Phil said, and Audrey quieted down. "I'd feel better knowing you were both as safe as could be. I find it hard to be objective when I truly care about someone, and I love both of you. I don't know what your plans are now, but if they include me then we should discuss this in my office before the rest of the Avengers fly in and physically assault me, too."

"They wouldn't dare," Audrey said firmly, and she threw herself into Phil's arms again. "Now show us to your office."

Phil slipped an arm around her waist, and then held his free hand out to Natasha.

"Coming with us?" he asked. She tilted her head, and then nodded, but chose not to take his hand. Phil heard Audrey's soft sigh of disappointment, but led them away without further comment. No matter what Natasha decided in regards to them, Phil had the woman he loved back in his embrace, and damned if he was letting HYDRA get their hands on her. On either of his soulmates.

Protective!Phil is protective.

And if he gets together with Rosalind Price in 'Agents of SHIELD' I will be supremely pissed off, and possibly stop watching the show. I already think that Bobbi and Hunter's relationship borders on toxic at times, and we don't need another antagonistic-turned-romantic relationship on the show. It sends the wrong message, in my opinion, that hate/mistrust can lead to a satisfactory romantic partnership.

(Damn it, I really need to catch up on the latest episodes. Sigh. Please don't tell me any spoilers.)

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