Disclaimer: I don't own SPN.
Nine hour shift, one abrupt customer and one outright rude one? To quote Mark Pellegrino, "You deserve an apocalypse." Speaking of Mark, I saw a customer today who looked like him and I nearly shouted, "Hi, Satan!"
…Yeah, that wouldn't have gone down well. So now I need pure, teeth-rotting fluff to cheer me up. Enjoy!
Thanks to noxsoulmate, RangerHorseTug, mollienaturerocks and Bipi for your reviews :)
61. Reverence
Sometimes, Dean just felt overwhelmed. All his life, his mission had been to protect Sam and this single goal, along with his military-like upbringing, hadn't exactly allowed for much of a self-esteem. Sam was the one to be protected; he was just the expendable piece, meant to sacrifice everything about himself to keep Sam safe. And when Cas had literally come crashing into his life and immediately deduced that Dean didn't think much of himself, that had started a wild whirlwind of a bond between the human and angel that had gradually built up for years, finally culminating after Cas had given up his grace to rid Dean of the Mark of Cain.
Dean wasn't some emotional, needy person who constantly required people to tell him that he was worth something. Hell, if people did start doing that then he grew uncomfortable and immediately shut them down. But for some reason, Cas always found it necessary to tell Dean just how much he loved the human and sometimes Dean was just overwhelmed.
Today was one of those days.
"I love you, Dean," Cas panted, pressing a kiss to Dean's jaw. "I love you."
"Yeah, I know," Dean groaned, tilting his head back. But Cas hadn't finished.
"I love you so much…" He suckled on Dean's throat hard enough to leave a mark. "You're so beautiful, Dean…"
"Dude," Dean complained. "You don't call another guy beautiful!"
"But you are," Cas insisted. "You are so amazing –" He kissed Dean's tattoo, "– so wonderful –" This time, he pressed his lips to Dean's sternum, "– and I love you –" He sucked one of Dean's nipples briefly, "– so very, very much." He moved to the other nipple.
Underneath Cas, Dean was a writhing, gasping mess of heat and emotions. He didn't deserve this sort of love! What had he done to deserve such a wonderful, loving angel?
"Cas…stop…" he forced out. Cas immediately ceased his actions and sat back, looking down at Dean in concern.
"What's wrong, Dean?" he said. "Did I hurt you?"
"N-No," Dean said shakily. "Just – what you're saying I – I – don't –"
"You don't think you deserve to be loved," Cas guessed straight away. His sudden growl startled Dean and he pressed a rough kiss to Dean's lips. "You are the most infuriating – stubborn – beautiful – human –" Each word was punctuated with a kiss. "When will you understand that you are more than worthy of such love?"
"I don't – just the way you look at me." It was the way Cas looked at Dean like he was the centre of the ex-angel's universe that unsettled him. "You look at me like – y'know – like I'm sorta god or something."
"You're not a god, Dean." Cas tenderly brushed Dean's sweaty hair out of his eyes. "You're far more. You're Dean and you're my human. And I will never – ever – stop – loving – you. I wish you would understand just how truly remarkable you are."
Dean stared, his chest heaving. Did Cas really think that much of him? Did the ex-angel really love him that much? Deep down, Dean had been afraid that Cas would realise just how much of a deadbeat he was and ditch his ass like Cassie had dumped him and like he had left Lisa. But now? Now he could feel those doubts evaporating.
And now, able to endure the raw, pure love always present in Cas' gaze, all Dean could do was let Cas kiss and touch and love him while thanking the heavens for giving him this angel to keep.