AN : / Hey there.
Finally it's here!
Sorry for the late update, but I have been really busy at work and my mood wasn't really into writting lately.
So, I hope you'll like it.
Thanks again for the support, it mean a lot to me.
Nina help me again. So thanks a lot!
Have a pleasant reading!
...
« Oh my god this is not even possible... » Arizona said, rubbing her neck, coming and going in the middle of her living room. « You... I... You wouldn't even believe me and you'd be totaly in your right. This is a sign... It's true... You see we can't do this... We can pretend that everything between us is normal. Because it's not, and that is just one more reminder. »
Callie was looking at her totaly lost. She didn't know what she was talking about but she let her keep talking.
« There was a good reason for you to leave me two years ago. It took me time but I finally accept it. And I was moving on with my live, I was me again. I was smiling, I was doing a lot of things, I was even planning to travel to China ! And you said that you loved me, and since then I am stuck. I can't do anything else but think about you, I was doing anything in the good way... You trapped me ! »
« Arizona ? Arizona ! » Callie tried to calm her down.
She finaly stopped her by grabbing her shoulders and shaking her a little. « What are you talking about ? »
« What ? » Arizona asked, totaly lost in her own monologue.
« I was asking you why you have my ex's earrings on your couch and than you were talking about China ? »
« Oh yeah... The earring... » Arizona replied sadly. « I can't tell you, but I swear I never touched her ! »
« So you know why it's here ! »
« I never said that... »
« Arizona ! »
Arizona took a deep breath. After all, she didn't owe Penny anything, but she didn't want to make Callie sad.
« I... Penny was here earlier... »
« What ? » Callie wrinkling her forehead.
« Apparently she's my roommates friend, and Andrew told her to come here because … I don't know why but she borrowed his room for a while... I didn't know it. And When i came home tonight I heard noises. I freakef out and called the police... They get in my house and they found her... »
« This is the most stupid story I ever heard... »
« I know... It sounds unreal but she was here... » arizona explained trying to hide the rest of the story.
« Oh... I get it now... » Callie said. « She confessed the day we broke up she had slept with someone when we were having a break. Must be Deluca... »
« No it's not him. He has a girlfriend. » Arizona explained. « And he was with her I don't know where, when Penny was here. »
« Oh... So tell me everything... She wasn't alone, was she ? »
« She wasn't... »
« Great... And do you know the person she was with ? »
« I do.. »
« Great ! So tell me... »
« Callie I don't think it's important... »
« Who cares ? Tell me ! » Callie yelled in exasperation.
« Listen, it's none of my busines who your perfect Penny sleeps with. » Arizona snapped. « I should have teold you as soon as I saw them... »
« What do you mean ? You knew before today ? »
« I... You know what ? Yeah, I knew... » Arizona said, about to reaveal the truth. « I'm tired of all those lies... I caught her sleeping with Murphy in an On call room. I was with Andy and we entered the room... And they were already... And they were here together this afternoon... And I don't know why I keep find them on my way... »
« Oh... So you were going into on call rooms with your girlfriend ? » Callie repeated the only news that had captured her attention.
« She was not my girlfriend... And Anyway I am free to do whatever i want... »
as the tension was its higher level in the room, Callie suddenly bursted in laughter in front Arizona, Bending her body and putting her hands on her knee.
First surprised by the unexpected reaction, Arizona began to laugh too and the two of them settled in a crazy an loud giggling, unable to stop it.
« This is... This is so stupid ! » Callie tried to say as she moved her hands betwenn herself and Arizona, pointing. « I don't even care ! »
« What ? » Arizona asked, trying to quiet her nervous laugh.
« Penny... » Callie said just before giggling once more. « I don't care about her... I mean I have great time with her, and she told me about having slept with somebody before we officially split up... But her, and Murphy... That's so... »
As her giggling started to quiet, Callie wiped the tears from the corner of her eyes, and sighed, trying to stop laughing for good.
« Yeah, that's so unbelievable... » Arizona said, sitting back on the couch an taking a sip of her expensive wine.
Callie, who was back to her normal state now, looked at her with a shy smile. Arizona wasn't paying attention to it, and when she turned her head to meet her ex eyes, she was surprised to see her looking at her that way.
« What ? »
« Why didn't you tell me ? » Callie asked softly.
« About what I saw ? I don't know... »
« Arizona... »
« I didn't want to be the one who broke your heart one more time... »
« What ? »
« I have hurt you enough... Telling you the truth would have hurt you... Again... »
« You were protecting me... » Callie smiled big.
« I don't know if i'd used that word but kind of ... »
« That's sweet... » Callie said, smiling. « But I wasn't hurt... I had a good time with her you know... Before all that crazy dinner and all its revelations. But nothing had been the same since, even if I tried to believe it was... »
« But you were gushing about her. You take her side and defend her in front of Amelia and Meredith... »
« You know me and my over protective complex don't you ? » Callie stated making Arizona smile. « But do you remember when you told me you wanted me to prove you that i was in love with you, and not attracted by the idea of being in love ? That's what happen with her. I was so busy trying to convince myself that i didn't love you anymore. And I thought we were over for so long. And then Andy arrived and it had been the trigger. I didn't want to see you happy with someone else. I want to be the one who makes you happy... »
...
Arizona who was on edge since the beginning of the day, felt the world collapsing around her.
Callie's words were perfect and she had said them with a deep sincerity that all her doubts seemed to have disappeared. Was it that simple ?
« You're sure about this ? » she asked the brunette who was sitting next to her on the couch.
« I am. » Callie replied, convinced and convincing.
« Because it's not something to be taken lightly... » Arizona said as Callie scooted closer to her.
« I know... »
« Because we have to talk about that. I … We can't just ... »
« I know... » Callie repeated, coming closer and putting her hand on Arizona's tight.
« Oh... » she said in surprise.
« I know... » Callie repeated, closer than never, begining to kiss Arizona's neck.
« Because we are just... Oh my god... » Arizona moaned.
« I know... »
And as Callie continued to kiss her neck, Arizona let her totaly taking the reins.
There was no more doubt now, Callie loves her and she loves Callie. It had taken them more than 2 years to be able to find their way to each other, but right now, Arizona thought that their journey apart was coming to an end.
« Calliope, it's not a good idea... Sofia is here and... »
« Tell me to stop... » Callie teased her, biting lightly her ear lobe. « Tell me, and I'll stop... »
« Oh my god... I... » Arizoma mumbled. « We can't...Please stop... »
Callie looked at her in surprise, but as she didn't want to screw everything up, she pulled away and sat back straight, her hand still on Arizona's back.
She was so unsure about what Arizona was feeling right now that she didn't want to lose that physical contact with her.
« You don't want … You know... » Callie tried to understand.
« What ? Of course I want to ... You have no idea how much I'd like that... » Arizona said, sighing. « But this is too much too fast... And I don't... I... I'm kind of rambling here... Sorry... »
« What are you sorry for ? » Callie asked, not really understanding what was going on with Arizona.
« I'd love to spend the night with you... but first, I don't think it's a good idea, and second I'm nervous about... you know... »
« No i don't know... » Callie wrinkled her forehead. « What do you mean ? »
« I haven't been... intimate with anyone for a very long time now... » She said, turning her head and blushing in shame.
« Well I haven't either... But we know each other right ? There's nothing to be nervous about... »
Still not getting what Arizona was trying to say to her, Callie wrapped her arms around her neck, pulling her closer and hugging her lightly. She noticed Arizona wasn't comfortable, and she thought it was because she was putting a little pressure on her.
"I haven't... been further that a few kiss with Andy..." Arizona sudeenly confessed. "And before her, I haven't even... go on a date..."
Callie gulped, trying to figure what Arizona was telling her.
"You mean, you haven't..."
"No..." Arizona replied in shame. "Not since the last time we..."
"Wow... i wasn't expecting that..." Callie stated, surpised by the confession.
Arizona left her arms and sat back a little further from Callie, ashamed and uncomfortable.
"It's pathetic I know... But I wasn't ready, and then I was busy and after I didn't want to ..." Arizona continued, avoiding Callie's gaze at all cost. "And just when I thought i was ready to move on, there you go again, making me love you... And I'm so nervous..."
Callie was touched by Arizona easiness of speaking with her. It was something she would have never done when they were wives.
« It's okay, we'll take our time... » She said.
« So what does that mean ? » Arizon asked as she finally looked intently at Callie.
« I want to get to know you. I've been hearing a lot of things about you, and I have to say I was surprised. So I'd like to have that chance... » Callie replied, leaning to kiss Arizona on her cheek. « If you're up for it... »
She looked at Arizona, waiting almost anxiously for a positive answer.
« We're trying to get back together... » Arizona said, hesitating between gasping and smiling.
« We're not getting back together though... We are rediscovering each other... »
...
« Was tonight a date ? » Arizona asked.
« Yeah... It was totaly a date ! » Callie said as she had took her purse and jacket and was standing in the middle of the living-room.
Arizona was still confused. Things seemed too perfect to be true, and generally, when she was happy there was always something bad waiting for her around the corner.
« But I have to go now... I'd like to stay but I have a big day tomorrow... » Callie explained, still staring at her ex wife.
« I see... » Arizona said, standing up and scratching her head. « I... You... »
« Hey Relax... » Callie reassured her, walking to her. « What's bothering you ? »
« I'm affraid that if you leave now... everything will get back to the way it was before all that happened ... » Arizona said, moving her hand between her and Callie. « I don't know how to act around you now... I don't know how to talk to you... »
« That is why we are going to have dinner, together in a neutral place, tomorrow... » Callie stated. « I'll pick you up at 7. You just have to find a sitter and to let me get acquainted with you. »
« You're sure ? »
« I am. You better get dressed really classy. » Callie smirked, walking closer and grabbing Arizona's shirt, bringing her a few inches from her own face.
Arizona was still tense but authorized herself to smile. « I'm sorry, it's just a big deal for me. And I'm still so confused... » She said. « you confuse me... »
« Am I ? » Callie teased, wrapping her arms around Arizona's waist tenderly.
« You are... You always have... » Arizona noded, Callie rubbing her lips on her jaw line. « But it feels... really, really good... »
« Well I know that feeling too, because since I saw you with that tall brunette, I was confused at first, but then, everything was clear... It was you, and no one else... »
She punctuated each word with a soft kiss on Arizona's face.
« Are you sure we're not going to screw up one more time ? » Arizona worriedly asked.
« No... I'm not sure but I know that no matter what I do, I want to be with you... »
Arizona let herself relax in Callie's arm, resting finally her head on her shoulder as the brunette rocked her slowly.
« But I really have to go now... » She whispered.
« Yeah... » Arizona mumbled as she hardly broke the embrace.
Facing her, Calling kissed her with a lingering loving kiss, taking her face between her hands.
« I'll see you tomorrow. » She whispered in the kiss, before walking away even if it was the last thing she wanted to do.
She turned back to Arizona just before opening the door and received a magical, dimpled smile that melts her heart.
« I'll see you tomorrow. » Arizona repeated, looking at her leaving with a twinge.