Note:
Denman: I have to agree, stuff has most definitely hit the fan! But don't think the fan can't be raised higher ;) Things will continue to hit the fan repeatedly until the fan breaks, falls down, then stuff will hit the ceiling and go airborne because I HAD TO BE SO EPIC LIKE THAT!
Anyway. I have been talking to a guy interested in doing Beta reading and grammatical fixing mumbo jumbo. You will find any chapters she edited are marked with a "this is edited by dude" at the bottom. Naturally, if anyone else would like to beta read and edit as well, just ask and I'll see what we can do. I don't mind giving credit to multiple beta readers/editors/dudes.
But for now, it's time to move on to the next part of this episode. I don't claim this episode is too exciting, but it is necessary to be played out step by step, which is partially why it is in six parts.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even the clothes on my back.
Episode 5 - Classified Information Part 3/6
The… talk… with the Psychiatrist was actually nice. I was expecting a guy in a white science lab coat with a pen and paper on which to write "this guy is insane!" and ask me "how does that make you feel?" every time I say how I feel. I expected snobby, pipe in mouth, glasses, overweight, having me lay down like a fossil exhibit kind of stuff.
Instead I got a clone with amazingly social capacity to seem like a regular guy instead of a soldier who simply listened. His questions weren't stupid. He acknowledged what I was working toward, namely not making an enemy out of EVERYONE I see. I can handle some enemies, but it would be stupid to do it to absolutely everyone. He also suggested meditation.
He didn't tell me to hug a tree or empty my mind or 'be at one with the sausage' stuff. It was breathe, count to 6, breathe out, count to 6, repeat. I can do it from any position, eyes open or closed, at any time. I don't need to sit like a pretzel and get my pants dirty or look like a monk. Or fail looking like a monk and actually look constipated.
He also suggest I look at something while I do it in case I need something to focus my attention on. Something that doesn't have a lot of moving around. Something like a bland picture or… I suggested my lightsaber and he thought it would be good.
I don't know, it sounded like a really good idea at the moment. Another of those feelings like it just fit with me. Maybe I've done this meditation before? I don't know. I don't strike myself as a monk. More of an ass.
I don't think many asses become monks.
The only thing he found odd from my perspective was how casually I took my amnesia. Took some explanation, but he came to see why. I just… don't like to think about it. Yeah, it sucks. It really does. But why would I sit there thinking about it all the time? Stuff happens. If I can find a way to fix it, then I'll go with that. If I don't… then I'll just move on and keep moving.
That and I just simply don't feel my past was important. It's a gut feeling that it either was a past I didn't like, or one that didn't matter. Either way, I'm going with my gut.
He said that some might call it running away, that I'm scared.
How can I be scared of something I don't remember? Whatever, it doesn't make sense.
Along the way he inquired if I had any memories from the Holocron. He didn't push, and I tried. At some point I must have started panting or sweating or hyperventilating or something, because he grabbed my arm to get me to stop thinking about it.
Basically when I first got the memories, it was overwhelming. My head had hurt, I was fighting a fever, etc. I also vaguely remember that I dreamed a lot of the memories in my sleep.
It became more of a blur after the whole 'suppressment session'.
I would be lying if I said I was… comfortable… with the memories. But hey, stuff happens.
If I didn't stop telling myself that I would probably find a corner and cry with all the 'stuff' that's been happening to me.
I knew Tree-Hugger would want something. So I gave him a bunch of names I remember and we finished.
Oh, and he tells me I am something called an A-D-H-D or H-D-D or A-D-D or D-U-I. Or something like that. I wasn't paying attention much at that point.
So now that that's all over, I walk down the stairs. At where we were sitting, the chairs are thrown aside, and Tree-Hugger is sitting on one looking completely whipped. Don't know what he did, but having just come out of the hospital, it probably wasn't smart.
"What's this?" I gesture to the papers thrown all over the place. It looks like a tornado hit the table.
"Research." Ahsoka lets me know and returns to looking into the distance thoughtfully.
Tree-Hugger is exhausted, girly is worried about something, and the place is a wreck. All in the course of an hour.
Boy am I glad I'm not a scientist.
Theumas plops a small notebook on the table. It has written in it all of the names I gave him.
The noise brought Tree-Hugger out of his stupor. "Oh, Varus, Theumas. How did it go?"
"The session went well, General Skywalker. If you wish for anything more than that, take it up with him." The clone gestured to me. He found his armor thrown to the floor in the rush to get the chair thrown as well. He looked from it, to them, to me (hey, I'm not involved with this one!) and back to it; before he reattach everything.
"Awww." Ahsoka wipes slightly. I can tell she isn't serious. When did she get so… I don't know, playful? All day she's been making comments and short responses to stuff. It's getting weird.
He tells us while he armors up, "Anything my client has to say is private and confidential unless he signs a paper saying you can hear it. Or just says so to me."
Client. I like being called that. Sounds official. Like I'm a rich snob rather than a poor snob.
"Leave them alone, Snips." Tree-Hugger chuckles. "Thank you, Theumas. You will find the appropriate orders already lined up for you. Varus, F-Y-I, he is going to be coming with us on extended missions on the star destroyer."
"Great."
He takes up the notebook on the table and glances through it. Then he heads for a computer and starts punching buttons.
Theumas shakes me hand firmly and says, "It was good talking to you, Varus."
I nod.
"AHHAWW!" Tree-Hugger yells. I jump and Ahsoka casually watches.
More than a few library occupants glare at us and for once it's not my fault.
There is a first time for everything I suppose.
Tree-Hugger spins in his chair and smiles at us broadly enough to scare a child. I am still trying to figure out why Ahsoka isn't panicking like me.
"What is the one thing all of those names have in common?"
I have no idea… Judging from girly's silence, she has no idea either.
"OK…" He reorganizes his thoughts. "Recent history. Canderous Ordo, the newly established Mandalore the Preserver." We nod. "Carth Onasi. A stalwart Republic general. A little overzealous at times, personally, but is one of our greatest front line generals." We nod again. "Jedi Master Juhani. Jedi Master that no one talks about because of his bad reputation and unusual view of things. Bastilla… Jedi who left, joined the Revanchist, came to lead the Revanchist, and married this person."
"Oh!" Ahsoka says emphatically like a ten year old girl. She must know now.
Yeah… I got nothing. Shouldn't I be the one who knows this stuff?
"Ahsoka." He points to her.
And like a bookworm she says: "They all worked with Republic against Darth Malak. Their team was led by Revan, formerly Darth Revan, Malak's Master."
Revan. I blink in surprise. That name smoothly clicks in place.
That's right.
While I stand amazed in revelation, Tree-Hugger is ranting stuff about droids, naturally grown hardware (naturally grown? Off a tree? How far are they going to take this tree-hugging stuff?), classified metals and something about a Holocron.
"It's all tied to Revan! It has to be. They were looking for something… I have a vague recollection of it. Information on it was deemed classified at some point, but it has to be related to the droids we found and the energy-element replication!"
And I have no idea what he is talking about. I'll take it all as a good job on my part. How about a 'thank you Varus'?
Tree-Hugger jumps in one leap to the table, collects all the papers together in one big armful, and dumps it all in a box with the hardware. "Come you two, we need to go higher up!"
"Uh, Master." Ahsoka asks gently. Tree-Hugger stops and turns out, dropping some papers in the process.
Ahsoka breathes in deeply and says, "May I go see Maris? I know this moment is important, but I feel my place right now is with my friend."
Tree-Hugger looks between us thoughtfully. I shrug, because I just don't care, but he seems to be thinking it out.
"Of course, Snips." He finally decides. "She lost a lot. She needs someone right now. I am sure Varus and I can take care of this."
She breaks out in a controlled squeal of thanks and hugs him. She looks like she is about to hug me too, probably to freak me out, and I put a foot up in her path to stop her. Instead she just says, "Good luck, Varus."
"Yeah…" I put my foot down. Tree-Hugger and I watch her run off to find her friend.
And by higher up, he means that both literally and figuratively. I think the Jedi Council room is at the top of the temple. If I can find an architect, I'll make sure to ask him.
The room looks amazingly familiar somehow… Well, I did have a memory flash thing from the Holocron. Revan must have stood in this room at some point.
"He has the memories of Revan." Tree-Hugger announces.
You could have heard a pen drop. I look around in boredom and note the lack of décor.
I know it's taking a leap of faith to say its Revan just because Tree-Hugger says so, but it just feels right. Besides, Tree-Hugger hasn't done me wrong so far.
It seems that the Masters are also as inclined to take him at his word, almost.
"Do you have any proof?" One of them ask. Hmmm, two points? Proof is good. Thoughtful.
Tree-Hugger begins his case. I stick my finger in my ear, he brings up names. He asks what they all have in common, I lick my finger. Disgusting.
"They all served on the Ebon Hawk under the leadership of Revan and Bastilla against Darth Malak."
Ebon Hawk… That's right! That's the name of the ship! I remember now… hmmm.
Where's the ship?
"That is most certainly true." a few of the Master's admit. "But that doesn't necessarily mean it's Revan."
"Varus. Bastilla was married to Revan. Do you have any memories to confirm that?" Tree-Hugger asks me.
Bastilla in a wedding gown. And in the shower, and in my bed, with me- OK MOVING ON!
There is no doubt in my mind Revan they were married.
"YES!" I say flustered and probably red as a beet. I look away and try to focus my mind on something besides… woman. A few of the Master's chuckle quietly at my embarrassment, but say nothing, thankfully. I am so glad Ahsoka isn't here!
One of the Masters I think is more… open… than the rest hums in thought. He is short and green and ugly.
Not sure what the green one's name is. So let's say Froggy. Froggy says, "Married, they were. Memories of Revan, the little one bears within him. Evidence enough, we have."
Is that a remark at my embarrassment or… Oh! I am going to take the little green ball and punt him out the window!
No, Varus. Temper. Focus. Count to six. Breathe in… Breathe out… Look only at Baldy's bald head. Let's not tick people off and embarrass Tree-Hugger.
"Thank you, Master Yoda." Tree-Hugger bows slightly.
Ok, Froggy is named Yoda… I prefer Froggy.
Tree-Hugger continues, "My search, however, has come to a dead end. While we can agree that the Holocron contained the memories of Revan as of some point where he married the Fallen Jedi Bastilla, that is as far as we can go. Information on the skulls, metals, hardware, residue, and Holocron writings came up as classified."
A couple of them looked between each other in mild curiosity. "Classified, you say?" Froggy fishes for confirmation.
"Yes, Master. Despite that, I was able to figure out that the skulls, bones, and Holocron writings are linked. As well as the wall powder residue, and metal from both the baller hardware and Holocron metal. All of the metal matches closely, and there is traces of medicloriens within the wiring. In addition… Well, normally, all hardware is uniform and standard to a specific pattern. In this case, every single piece of hardware was unique. Not so unique as to say that a function wasn't a function in the same way that my liver is not a normal liver, or heart, or lung or so on; but in each case, while the hardware functioned in the same objective, the wiring itself was unique for each one."
More than a few of us looked at him oddly.
"To put it simply, I believe the droids are grown in a way that is almost natural, in a sense. Factory made, but yet not with a pattern so specific and constrictive, but rather a way that allows individuality to appear in some form. I believe it to be an advanced energy-element replication. Notably, this technology is only seen in some kitchens for practical purposes, and not to mention small in scale. But that is us. That is how far we have come. The technology employed in the production of the ballers is far beyond us, able to infuse the strengths of a Holocron with the production of a replicator."
"Strengths of a Holocron?" One asked.
"Since the droids have medicloriens imbedded within them, similar to a Holocron, it assists with their programming. In a sense, they are Force sensitive."
And now the Masters freak out. Just as quickly as they panic and argue, they stop. Tree-Hugger continues, "This 'Force sensitive' technology is the hallmark of the Infinite Empire, namely. So I believe the bones and writing to be of the Infinite Empire as well. The only question being how Revan would be involved with the former Empire? This I believe is where it becomes classified."
"Indeed." Froggy says. At this point I think he is going to be the only Master truly talking. The rest don't seem to be as comfortable or knowledgeable in this subject. "Information you seek, classified it was, to prevent power grabs and hunger for power. You know of Star Forge?"
Tree-Hugger nods. "Yes. It fits the description of what evidence I have seen perfectly, yet it is destroyed. Are you saying there is another?"
"Not so. Destroyed, the Star Forge was not. Repair itself, it did, just as fast as it was damaged. Impossible, destruction was. Erase trace of it, all we could do was. Easy it is, to find and abuse it, if easily known."
Tree-Hugger fell silent. "The Star Forge was not destroyed… Do we know where it is?"
Froggy shook his freakishly wrinkled head. "Count Dooku. Erased it, he did."
"Does he have it?" Tree-Hugger asked quickly.
Baldy spoke up, "I doubt it. If I recall, the location was somewhere in Hutt space. He has no reach there."
"But we cannot know for certain." Another Master said. This one looked on Tree-Hugger with clear favor. He was some human with a beard. "If the Count has the Star Forge, he can easily sit on it without moving at all. He won't have to make a move with it until it has built up a fleet enough to wipe us out in one sweep."
"It can do that?" I whisper to Tree-Hugger. He nods worriedly.
Sounds dangerous.
"We don't even know how long the Forge takes to build a small fleet, much less one that can rival ours!" A Master argues.
"That doesn't matter." Baldy says firmly. "The fact is… this war is hitting a point where it is about attrition. We had a good run. We had a surprise army with great skill. We won many many victories. But the advantage of droids is the ability to just keep producing, and producing, and producing with no care for losses. Living people are not like that. We are nearing a stalemate, which is exactly what they would want, because they can, and will, outlast us if it comes to that."
Baldy sighs and sits up straight, "This pains me to consider, but we need the Star Forge if we are going to last out this war."
More than a few Masters gasp, but just as many nod in agreement. I am going to be standing here a while… Aren't I?
"Enough!" Baldy raises his voice and everyone quiets down. "The facts are this. Our troops are not being recruited fast enough to keep up with the Separatists, and we are losing more and more clones each day. The war is taking its toll. It is turning into attrition, which clones are simply not designed for. The Star Forge IS designed for it. Not only may the ancient factory provide us with the troops to keep going, but taking it will keep it out of the Hutts and Count's hands! In addition, the one to find it was Revan, and Skywalker's Padawan has Revan's memories. I am not to believe in fate nor coincidence, but I do believe the Force has put the Forge all but in the palms of our hands!"
Several of them were quieted.
Wait… wait a second. They think I can find it? Heh… no? I don't know where it is.
"Skywalker." Froggy says. "Would you be able to find it, if to be assigned the mission, you were?"
Tree-Hugger looks to me and I mouth the word 'no'.
"I believe so." He says firmly.
Must… resist… need… to throttle him!
"Tree-Hugger, how can you expect me to do this!" I say the instant we leave the chambers. "I don't know what it looks like, I don't know where the Ebon Hawk went because it's just a scrambled mess in here, and I… where am I even supposed to start!?" I throw up my hands and groan to myself. Seriously, these people!
"All will be well, Padawan."
"Right… and you can read the future now?"
"Jedi can at times."
"Bullshit."
He glances at me behind his back at my cursing, and says, "Varus."
"Ye, ye…" I get it already. Mouth.
"No, Varus. We can see the future at times when we are powerful and skilled enough, but I don't need to this time."
I ask curiously. "Why's that?" He gonna pull a rabbit out of his hat or read a fortune?
"I have faith."
"Oh? In what?"
"You."
He says it casually like it was the most obvious thing in the world. A simple word. One word.
And it still stops me in my tracks and knocks the breathe out of me.
He has faith… in me. In ME. Me of all people. Me. The guy who messed up more than anyone else I know, even though the list is short, and will continue to do it because: I don't know better. I just do things, and it tends to mess up.
And he has faith… in me.
For once, I really don't know what to say.
"Are you coming?" He calls from the elevator, and I snap out of my thoughts.
"Yeah, hold on!"
Chapter Edited by Aeterna Knight: u/4617921/
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