Note: In the previous chapter Varus had a very not-cool moment in terms of how his mind wandered. But you have to remember that characters, no matter how badass, are still human, and humans are prone to thinking. Trust me, if you having nothing to do for an hour except sit and think… and think… then your mind will go in all kinds of stupid directions.
One of the things I try to do is show that Varus is just as much human and has some "normalcy's" as much as everyone else, but it is the moments that truly matter that show how he is different.
Take Anakin for instance. He is a Jedi Knight, Republic General, prophesized dude, and yet he still has a normal hobby of tinkering and messing with hardware. He chooses to focus his wandering mind on that. Varus lacks a true hobby in his free-time so his mind is going to wander in all kinds of directions.
To be honest, the only character in this entire fan fiction that I have a difficult time with is Ahsoka. She lacks a core characteristic in my mind. I mean… God, I have a better idea how to bring out Falon's character even though he has only appeared one time! I know she is stubborn and is reckless like Anakin, but I don't want to make three stubborn, reckless people all in the same group. Someone needs to be more normal than that or the "team" will wind up being a bland combination of exactly one characteristic. So I am trying to keep Ahsoka similar to how she truly is, but a lot less reckless and stubborn with the excuse that she has had a good bit of it worked out overtime.
This episode overall will be short, sweet, and to the point. I am not going to be adding extra scenes to explore character development. This episode is like a good pancake. Too much water or milk and it thins out and turns to crap. No, this episode will be short because every. Single. Moment. Matters. And I have no intent to thin it out or take away from the importance of a single moment.
Edit: Tried to make it short, but keeping it to the point didn't help much because there was a lot of point to keep!
And guys, please don't think I REQUIRE reviews! I'm not crying, I'm not upset, my whole life doesn't depend on it. Please don't apologize to me if you don't. It is a privilege to hear your thoughts. The only effect it actually has on me is that I have noticed there is a pattern of it, so I can use that pattern to judge how good or bad individual chapters are. I am not afraid to go back and rewrite things.
I am just very biased so its hard to judge. I love Varus. I give him so much freedom inside my mind to do what he wants that our personalities might actually be mixing… hopefully not, I wouldn't want to subject you all to what chaotic epic crap is in my head. But still, I enjoy writing of Varus and seeing his viewpoint that I am completely and utterly biased. In my mind, every chapter is 10/10. Which is why I like outside perspectives so much, and slightly rely on them.
If you don't want to review, don't. If you feel anything is good or bad enough to worth mentioning, do so. Its not a big deal xD
So again, don't apologize to me.
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not even the clothes on my back.
Episode 7 - There is a Time for Peace Part 2/2
"You are afraid…" Someone says. The voice is raspy and hollow. It drips venom and sounds almost robotic. Yet it sounds vaguely… familiar.
I turn toward the voice, but see nothing. The door closed behind me and the place is nothing but darkness. I flip on my yellow saber and peer around. Using it as a light, I wave it and see… nothing. I see a pillar, but nothing of importance.
The opposite door I had been walking toward should be… to my left? I don't know. The pillars are lined up in a row, so there is only one of two ways to go. I should flip a coin and guess. With odds of fifty-fifty, it isn't a bad thing.
"You are weak…" The voice says.
"Yea yea yea…" I mutter to myself.
A second pillar appears out of the darkness. Lining up the first and second pillars in my head, I walk with more confidence toward where a door should be. A few seconds later I reach it and examine it.
The door has no words, no 'Force Push discs' things, or handles or… anything. It's as smooth as the black walls except for a clean line up the middle where the double-door opens and separates.
"You are pathetic…"
I roll my eyes and turn around. This door is a bust. The other one should be straight ahead. I head for it. My saber gives off light enough for me to not be afraid of tripping over anything, but I can't help but be cautious. The air is growing colder and colder by the second, and the darkness seems to be almost drinking in my light as if it was hungry.
"Really, why's that?" I ask the darkness. "Why am I weak, pathetic, and… what was the third thing? Gorgeous?"
The opposite door's shape, probably the exit, appears out of the darkness like an empty three-dimensional model. However it is not that that makes me stop in my tracks.
There is a man standing in front of the door with his head bowed. He raises his head up slowly at my approach. He flips on a red lightsaber and his eyes flash red with dark power in the darkness.
My gut tells me this is about to turn ugly, and I turn my saber into a backwards position as well. In perfect tune with my movements, he turns his red saber backwards just like me, and he assumes the exact same battle stance right down to the footwork and how we have our non-saber hands out slightly for balance, and tilt our heads to the side slightly for no reason.
The air around me grows so cold and icy my limbs shake, and cold, hot adrenaline shoots up my spine. Yet, my opponent is completely unaffected. No, he relishes it.
"Because you lack… hatred." He seethes.
Ahsoka flinched at the sound of the slamming door behind her. Her lightsaber light clearly showed there was no way back. Oh well, not like it was the first time she had been in a trap. Being apprentice to Anakin Skywalker tended to mean going into a lot of traps, on purpose. She may tease Varus a lot, but a year or two ago she had been just as reckless, if not more so.
Turning herself forward, she strode to the door. With a gentle Push, it opened.
The air immediately changed. It was heavy and hot with fumes. The black walls became darkish-red from a distant light. Sounds of fires and metalwork came from a vast distance, but nearby was the sounds of electricity. Sparks flew off of the walls and skidded across the floor randomly. The Dark Side exploded out of the door and nearly knocked her off her feet.
The place reminded her of Sector 7207, but it was darker… More foul. More fresh. The sector's darkness was one of the past. This place's darkness was fresh and acting. No, more than that. The air was more than stale, it was active. The Light and Dark were in great conflict.
The sound of lightsabers clashing sent her feet into motion.
The deeper part of the temple sent chills down her spine as she ran. The Force energy in the very walls screamed of death, dread, evil. Not necessarily passion of Sith, but the lack of all emotion and empathy. Life did not exist in any form. It was past death, the walls had surrendered to being nothing. But nature abhors nothing, and so the very walls were consuming everything to compensate. Almost as though the place was dieing and struggling to stay alive.
If she were to picture the Force in colors in her own mind, the Light would be green or blue. Green brought peace and calmness while blue was more of a wisdom thing. The Dark side would be red. Red was the color of passion in all forms as well as blood. But this place… it would be black. It consumed everything, peace, passion just as much as the color black consumes all colors and refuses to let it go. In its place was nothing but void, a void that sent chills down her spine and felt… foreign. It wasn't just the Dark and Light that was at conflict, there was a third Force… One even more vile and evil than the other, this third one hungered for them both like a great predator watching its prey tear each other apart, before consuming them both utterly.
The building itself was wounded and shattered, bleeding sparks, and hungry. Large cracks spread everywhere, and entire walls had holes in them showing the room on the other side. Doors lay broken and scattered on the floor. Fires erupted from areas of the walls and floor that was more volatile, and her race down the labyrinth was dangerous just for the flamethrowers shooting out, not to mention the gaps in the floors that opened into darkness. Her steps made the flooring tiles crack like thin ice. All the while she felt the predator she was now inside of was watching her, laying out traps and death to suck her into the walls, because the holes and flames shot out without warning, and many a time she nearly fell from not having seen a hole that seemingly opened up just for her.
Every second she spent in the place only made the place feel more wrong. She could barely draw on the Force at all and she started to feel like she was drowning inside her own body. Everything pushed against her. Every step she took became more and more hasteful, and before long she was running, no, fleeing as fast as her legs could carry her down the path.
The sounds of a lightsaber battle continued on and on, and became closer as she sprinted down the long maze of turns. Before long she heard the crinkling of electricity, not just in the walls and sparks, but in a large enough capacity to sound like millions of squawking birds.
She rounded another corner and stopped. The new room she entered was massive, easily large enough to be a full battle cruiser hanger bay. One entire wall of the room was missing, possibly a hanger door in design. Gazing out of it she saw a giant red sky with black clouds. Dark fumes climbed out of the metal earth and fires erupted like small volcanos, shooting up into the sky before receding for a time. In the distance she could make out a large building like a black castle climbing up into the clouds.
"Impossible…" She uttered in disbelief.
This wasn't Dantooine. This was the darkest part of Coruscant where the lowliest worked. She knew of this place. She had never been near it, but the Dark Side was so thick and so omnipotent here that the only things that survived were robot workers. Not even plant life survived.
The clash of lightsabers snapped her attention and she saw two Jedi fighting.
Master Anakin was in battle with a much smaller, more nimble, Jedi… Varus.
Anakin beat his fist on the doors to where Snips had gone just as he had Varus's door. There was no panel to Force Push. There was no handle. No writing. Nothing. The door did not open automatically when he came near, and trying to Force Push did nothing anyway. The doors would not give. If anything his Force power was weaker than before as though something was sucking it up.
He pulled out his saber and stabbed the door, but it would not pierce. An invisible shield kept his saber from touching the door perfectly. Thinking fast he searched for panels, any place he could open and get his hands on hardware, but no place could be found.
Not at Snips door, nor at Varus's. In fact the only door with any abnormality was the one with writing.
He returned to it and studied the words. The writing was written outward rather than inward, so one of the words could be a button. Yet at the same time there could be multiple buttons with a trap mechanism in place if he failed. So very lightly he brushed his fingers along the writing. Ever so carefully he checked for if a single letter or indention had any give. Buttons usually moved slightly if they were designed to be pressed when you ran your fingers over them. Solid rock had no give at all.
To his displeasure, the wording had no buttons to be pressed.
Then what was the point? Anakin groaned in frustration.
He could not feel his students at all ever since the doors closed. Whether they were transported to a new place or the building kept them shielded and separate from him within the Force itself, it was a scary prospect. Rarely had he ever come across a technology capable of working so intertwined with the Force itself.
Before I could contemplate what the man's problem was, he sprang forward and brought his saber down on me. I twisted around to the side, letting it swing by, and brought up my own. He turns sharply at the hip, evading my strike, and used his momentum to change the trajectory of his lightsaber up at me. I jumped back as it skid by my face. The heat of its energy coming so close I felt my face burn.
As he spun in midair he landed on one of his hands and pivoted around so he landed on his feet instantly but also was lunging at me simultaneously. My yellow blade locked with his red and for a moment we were stuck against one another in the same position.
With our blades crossed I managed a good look at his face, only a few inches from mine. He was… horrifying. His face was covered in a black mask surrounding his head with a slit down the middle and slit across the eyes from where his red orbs shined out. His gasping, difficult breathe came out as wisps of steam on my face.
Metal plating was bolted to the side of his neck, and his shoulder protruded out a metal spike from under the skin. His forearm and back of his hand had bone replaced with metal, and his fingers had been cut off at the ends and replaced with long, thin metal sharp as daggers. His chest was partially covered in a tattered black cloth, but it looked like some of his ribs had been replaced as well.
His body was an abominable combination of metal and flesh sown together hastily and still freshly bleeding and infected.
On his hip resided a belt with a collection of lightsabers hanging from it, and it doesn't take a genius to know this 'temple guardian' was up to collecting mine.
The worst part was… something about his eyes looked so… familiar.
"See something you like, Jedi?" He laughed hoarsely.
We brought our hands together simultaneously, both doing Force Push, and the conflicting air between our palms screamed in a bubbled torrent of energy. Neither of us held back or ended our technique, and the resulting shockwave knocked us both away.
I skidded across the floor in a rolling tumble and he hit a pillar. The pillar cracked and broke under his impact, but he didn't notice. I climbed to my feet and he was already gone. His lightsaber was turned off so I couldn't see him in the darkness.
Not wanting to be the only one hidden, I turned my saber off as well and let the whole room become dark as night.
"Who are you?" I wonder. "I didn't sense anyone before…" For that matter, even now I couldn't sense him. The sheer amount of Dark Side in the room was covering his existence like a fog. "Are you the guardian of this place?"
"You are afraid…" He repeats. "To remember…"
Ahsoka could scarcely believe what it was she was seeing. Her master was fighting her fellow Padawan?! Every blow was fast, aimed, and lethal! Varus evaded and went for the heart, but Anakin always blocked them with strength and experience before he brought down a strike that would break him! They were more than just fighting, they were trying to kill each other!
"What has come over you two!" Ahsoka yelled.
They ignored her and continued their duel. Force blasts erupted from their hands as they tried to get the edge on each other. The blasts nearly knocked Ahsoka to the ground, and they weren't even aimed at her! The sheer amount of power they were throwing at each other was enough to knock tanks aside like boxes of cardboard.
The floor and walls of the building developed indents from the power hitting it and the building screeched angrily. Varus and Anakin paid it no mind. All of their focus was on killing each other. There was no mercy or holding back, someone was going to die.
"Stop it!" She yelled. She grabbed a ceiling tile and pulled down sharply. A ramp fell, all kinds of cylinders and tiles and wiring fell on them. Anakin and Varus both jumped away to avoid the destruction, but just as quickly as they separated, they charged each other again.
All she did was put the fight on hold for a second.
Ahsoka yelled for an explanation, for them to tell her what was going on. She had thought that Varus and Anakin were in another part of the building, but why were they fighting? Did they not realize… who… they… were.
No, they didn't. They were under illusions.
"Wake up!" She generated a force blast, but Varus and Anakin both stopped it with but a small flick of their wrists and continued to ignore her.
The two of them locked blades and Ahsoka's neck hair tingled with worry. Something was about to happen. They were about to kill each other!
If they wouldn't listen… She would have to make them!
She dashed forward as fast as her legs could carry her, ignited her sabers, and jumped into the fray. She struck down on the first one she could reach, Varus. It wasn't a blow that would injure him, but it should wound enough to stop him until he received a medigel treatment.
Just as her blades came down a red lightsaber appeared in Varus's second hand, which he used to block her.
Anakin pressed down on Varus from his left, and Ahsoka had him pinned on the right. "You have to stop it!" She tried to reason with him.
"Why…" Varus muttered. He was angry, and his anger grew and grew until his chest was heaving in barely contained fury. "Why am I the one who has to stop? Why is it always me!" Ahsoka blinked in surprise. This was the first moment in the fight she had seen his face, his back had been turned the entire time.
His eyes were red and filled with anger… and pain.
"No…" She breathed.
"HOW DARE YOU!" He yelled. Lightning poured out of his body suddenly, traveling up his arms, across his saber, and to both Anakin and Ahsoka. The pain was unlike anything she had ever experienced. It was like she was on fire everywhere the lightning touched, her insides boiled and seared in cooking heat, and knives were cutting across her everywhere. She fell to her knees, but as soon as she raised her head… Varus was gone. Anakin was gone. The dark red lit building, the distant clouds and sounds of fire… All of it.
She was back in the Dantooine dark temple place.
The pain was still fresh in her mind even though her skin was clean. Her body had no scars, but her mind… The empty, hungry void, the hatred Varus portrayed, the pain… the fact that she had to choose to strike a friend. While all she wanted to wake them up and get them to stop, she still had to resort to attacking him to get them to pause and pay attention to her.
It was all too much. She hugged her knees and waited for it to end.
What is he talking about? I have Revan's memories, and the only thing I have to fear from them a lot of explicit material that would get me on his wife's personal kill list. Then there is my own memories.
"I don't know what you're talking about…" I say. "I lost my memories to a major concussion. You understand that? I LOST them!"
The other one laughs darkly. "Lost them to thugs!? Please… we are far too skilled… far too powerful… to lose them to such trash."
I never said it was thugs. How did he guess?... And what does he mean 'we'?
The darkness around us shifts and I see a world, beautiful like Dantooine, and with people of all kinds walking around in life. The two things that stand out to me is that, first of all, they are all blind with cloth over their eyes, and second, there is a giant pillar of fire in the distance rising up into the sky. Yet the pillar of fire is comforting in some way rather than looking threatening.
Then its dark again and we're back in the dark temple.
He continues, "For the Jedi to have come up with such a pathetic excuse is an insult if I have ever heard one."
Ok, now he is really getting on my nerves. "Will you shut up!" I hiss. Just talk, talk, talk.
"You may have lost them, but you haven't tried to reclaim them! Your existence is an insult to both of us!"
The world shifts around me again, and this time I see the bridge of some… ship. The ship is in pieces with sparks flying from everywhere. It's a wonder the thing is kept together.
Then its dark again. Pain makes me hiss as my head feels like someone is stabbing it. "I said shut up! While you're at it, leave me alone!"
"If only I could… You aren't worthy to carry the name." He says entirely too close. The hair on the back of my neck raises.
I swing myself back just in time to not be decapitated as a red lightsaber appears out of nowhere. Just as quickly as he appeared and struck out, his saber turns off and he disappears again.
"I am really, really, REALLY getting tired of you!" I yell. "Come out and fight like a man, coward!"
"You are too afraid to remember! You are too weak to remember!" He says with a pitying hollow voice. He flips on his saber, reveals himself, and faces me. His saber points at me briefly before turning into his normal fighting stance. "For that, I shall end us!"
Anakin read the words to himself again, and again, and again. There didn't seem to be a riddle. Every sentence started with the same sequence "there is a time for". A total of six times this is repeated. Three of them involve good qualities, three times, not so much. The words were peace and war, mercy and examples, love and hate, to look back and to look forward. Each set was met by an opposite.
Peace vs. war, obvious enough. Yet it was more than just an absence of war, true peace was impossible. The only true alternative was talking your way through conflict by argument rather than clash of arms. There is always going to be rumors of wars or wars or threats somewhere.
Mercy vs. examples. Examples signified something like punishment to show others what happened when the person was crossed or when law was broken. Mercy was where, even if law was broken, the person is let go.
Love vs. hate… This was where Anakin understood more than anything. Both were necessary in their own rights, despite what his peers might think. Love heals and mends wounds of the heart more than anything he knew of. Hatred… it was dark and evil. Yet perhaps the right signified a release of hatred. Hatred by its very nature was an infesting emotion that corroded a person's heart. The Jedi taught to ignore such things, but if you can't ignore it no matter how hard you try, then what? The Jedi refuse for outlets to exist.
In a way, hatred of evil itself was a good thing. He hated his side that lead him to murder the Sand people. It was an outlet, one that didn't work in the end, but hatred at times needed an outlet. Padme often took out her negative emotions by screaming into her pillow, and he made sure not to laugh when it was about him. Ahsoka released her negative emotions in much the same way, as well as shooting harmless objects at him like peas and carrots or grass and bugs. Varus… Well, he cursed a lot. He yelled and he acted out a bit. Even Anakin was known to do that, though he did it in a language Varus didn't understand.
Love on the other hand, as said, was the greatest healing power there exists. It binds people together. It is the source of friendship, of empathy, of community, of mercy and forgiveness and value of life! Without love the galaxy would be a dark, empty, useless collection of rocks.
To look back and look forward. Both were neither good nor evil, they simply were. To focus solely on one was dangerous, since looking back slowed one to a standstill in life, and looking forward sometimes made them forget who they truly are.
Anakin closed his eyes a moment and looked over them all again. All of the good traits, Peace, mercy, and love were on the left side of the double door, while the opposite were on the right side. Naturally it was a test, but of wha-
Varus went through the left door and Snips went down the right.
Peace is on the left and war is on the right.
Anakin kicked himself. It was too easy! He had analyzed it too far. Of course it was a test, but the answer was right here! -Can anyone hear me!- Anakin called out through the Force. Truth be told Varus had not been taught yet to speak through the Force yet, but Snips and him had it to a small amount together. Communication devices were better, but for the moment it would have to do. He waited a moment, two moments. A whole minute. Nothing. No response. He couldn't even feel his students at al- He could feel Ahsoka. When did she get back?
The words 'War', 'Example', 'hate', and 'looking forward' all lit up and the door to Ahsoka's room opened. Anakin dashed in to find she was on the ground shaking like a leaf. Without second thought he scooped her into his arms. He carried her back to the center room and set her down.
"What happened?" He asked gently. When she didn't answer, he opened his mind to her. He touched her mind and her consciousness reeled from the touch. She was screaming inside but struggling to contain it. She refused to look him in the eye and she just leaned back against the wall. Her entire posture turned into a ball. She just wanted to be alone.
The demented creep was strong. Stronger than I ever expected. More than that, he was fast, he was lethal, he left no breathing room, and he never left me alone. Thankfully he doesn't rely on raw strength like Tree-Hugger does. When I blocked him, he didn't put enough strength into it to hurt my weak wrist, instead he did exactly what I would do. The instant our blades tapped each other, he would turn his wrist and attack again in such rapid succession that the two blows almost seemed like one.
His style was my own. It was chaotic, random, impossible to predict, yet at the same time we kept so much of ourselves exposed that it appeared to be a trap. To my uberance, I went for the trap numerous times and nearly was decapitated for it. It was a very interesting perspective to finally experience the unorthodox style from the opposite end.
However he was far better at it. I sidestepped one of his blows and struck, but rather than pierce him, he had only continued to lunge forward past me and turned off his lightsaber. I did the same and silently walked back. I reached out into the Force for him, and felt little. At first I had been blinded by the overpowering Dark Side in the room, but slowly over time I had come to be able to distinguish things a bit. Not unlike allowing my inner eye to adjust to the dark room.
Movement to my side sent me into motion. I struck my saber up and met only air, but I knew he was there. The problem was I wasn't sure exactly where.
I felt a wave of energy near me and every hair on my body stood on end. Light flashed, and I barely had time to raise my saber to block the new attack.
A whip of pure lightning struck down at me. It wrapped around my saber and instead of being stopped only moved along it to me. Pain rippled through my body. I fell to my knees, my arm limp and numb at my side.
Just as my knees hit the ground a burst of air hit me in the chest from my invisible attacker and I flew back into a pillar. I pulled the Force into my body instinctively. Had I not done so, my back would have shattered against the solid stone.
Lightning rippled across the ground in two long whips of energy. They began coiled around my enemies wrists, pooled down to the ground, and laid out across the length of it just as a normal whip. The sound was ear-piercing as the condensed lightning traveled within itself and sang of chaotic energy.
With a wary eye I look upon him. He stands ready to strike me down, and odds are I won't be able to stop it… My arm is numb. I might even have broken ribs.
-VARUS!-
I blink at the voice, and laugh uncontrollably despite the fact I am probably going to die. Serious, this is just crazy.
"What is so funny?" My opponent asks me.
"This!" I laugh. "I lost my memory, gained one I didn't ask for, been chasing ghosts, have fought an illusion, been seeing things and having nightmares, and now I have a voice in my head! Could I possibly be any more crazy?!"
-Varus! Listen, It's me. Anakin.-
Great, the voice is calling itself after my master. Is this some kind of teacher gig? I heard some students remember the teachings of their masters almost literally as voices.
-Varus, you bantha poodu!-
Only… I don't think saying that was one of Tree-Hugger's more glamorous sayings… The illusion twirls the whips around and then lashes out. I roll to the side and get behind a pillar. Its cowardly, but I have nothing that can fighting lightning whips!
-If you are fighting, you have to stop! That's the key! The two doors are opposite! Remember, 'There is a time for peace. There is a time for war.' Snips encountered war, you must encounter peace!-
Me encounter peace… Right.
Force, if this is your idea of a joke… The feeling's mutual.
-You have to do whatever you can to find peace in whatever you see!-
"Leave me alone!" I yell. The illusion laughs. "Not you!"
"Oh? This voice of yours?"
The lightning crackles out of existence and the room is dark again. I am starting to feel my fingers again. Thankfully my fingers locked themselves around the hilt of my dormant saber. Out of the darkness a red saber appears and I deflect it. Predicting his next move, I intercept quickly and punch him in the face with a handful of dirt. He backpedals a bit.
-Varus! You probably are thinking you're surrounded by ghosts and illusions and odd voices…-
No, you think?
-But you have to listen! Trust me!-
The illusion growls and wipes the junk out of his eyes.
Trust the voice… Trust Tree-Hugger. To be frank that rubs me the wrong way. I… trust him in so far as to have good intentions, but to trust him with my life is another matter.
'You don't trust' Tree-Hugger had said.
Ye, that's another problem with me… I am open with people, but I still don't trust them. No one. Not even him.
The master who looks at me and sees… me. Who understands… me.
I shake the conflicting thoughts away, and decide to go with the one thing that has never let me down. My gut. What does my gut say?
My gut says to trust him…
I sigh and curse myself for having to rely on someone, and doing it willingly. I'm not just doing it willingly, I'm doing it because I want to. I want to have someone share my burden, to have someone who can watch my back.
I want to trust him… If the voice really is him.
"Fine…" I whisper. I turn off my lightsaber.
If Tree-Hugger gets me killed I am going to reincarnate as a squirrel and run up his pants leg.
"What is this?!" The illusion demands once he cleans his eyes out through the mask. He seems upset by my passiveness.
Ok, if I say I won't hurt him, that will just tick him off. If I say I want peace and love and hugs, then he will think me to be as insane as I think I am, and kill me. No no, if I am going to find 'peace' and butterflies and all that nonsense, I need to do it on his terms.
From the beginning he has been going on about weakness and my cowardness to remember. Truth be told, his problem might be more about whether or not I am willing to search myself out. To find what I lost instead of just acknowledging it as lost.
"I'm getting out of here." I tell him. "And when I do, I am going to remember. I'm going to search out myself. I'm going to remember my parents. My friends growing up. If you're a figment of my past, then I will remember you too."
"You think that will satisfy me?!" He barks.
"It will have to. Because whether you like it or not, that's what I'm going to do. Ye, I'm a coward. My gut tells me I don't WANT to remember! But I'm going to because if there is one thing I am going to say, honestly, at the end of the day. It's that I don't back on my promises."
"Heh… Why should I trust your word?" He mocks. "Your word means nothing!"
I rub my forehead and nod. "That's right, all I have is my word, and to an extent I doubt even that much, myself. But I am going to do it because if I am going to ever trust anyone, my friends, my team, I have to be someone who can trust himself first before I can trust others. You are just an illusion. So I am making this promise to myself, not to you and whatever piece of this building conjured you! To myself! I WILL find myself out!"
The illusionary Sith studies me closely in silence, and in the yellow-red dim lighting of our lightsabers, I look him in the eye with all of the fervor I have ever had.
His lightsaber turns off, the door opens, and light fills the room. He's gone.
I leave the room to find both of my team already waiting. Tree-Hugger was pacing back and forth when I walked in, and now is looking at me worriedly. "Are you hurt?"
"Nah, I'm fine." I wave his concern off, gently. I don't say anything or show it, but his concern is welcoming.
Girly jumps up from the corner she was crouched in and comes at me. I sidestep a hug, only to find she came up short. "I wasn't going to hug you…" She narrows her eyes at me.
"Good. I would have hit you." I smirk.
Girly puts on a tight-smile, and the sight worries me. Normally she is carefree like a bird or something. Now she is… upset, worried. I can't say it's about me like Tree-Hugger, but it just feels wrong to see her like this. Where's the positive energy she always has?! She looks down and away from me, and wraps her arms around herself. "The illusion you encountered…" She breathes. "Was it… a red planet."
"Nooo." I say slowly. I arch an eyebrow up. Was her's? "My illusion was a nutjob Sith with serious medical issues. In this place. I wasn't anywhere special." I don't mention the brief illusions of the planet with the pillar of fire or other one. They were flashes, nothing worth noting.
"So… you weren't fighting… two people?" She asks barely high enough to be a whisper. Sounds like she is leading up to something, or has something specific in mind.
"No."
"Oh… Good."
Tree-Hugger and I look at each other with the same worried expression, and Ahsoka just walks away with her head bowed. Something is seriously wrong here. "I take it yours was?" I ask. She nods briefly, but I get the feeling she doesn't want to talk about it as she walks away. It's not a large room, but right now it feels like she is miles away from us.
Tree-Hugger glances at me, "So your test was just fighting a Sith?"
"Yea. Turns out, trying to reason or not fight a Sith is hard. He didn't seem inclined to respect my negotiating skills." I half-joke about my negotiating skills. With the sad atmosphere it comes out flat. Tree-Hugger watches his other apprentice worriedly.
"Did you hear me through the force?"
"That was you?" I ask. Tree-Hugger nods. "Good. I thought I was going mad."
Now he chuckles slightly, still sadly, but it's something. "I won't argue with that, but that was a technique in the Force that is created by Force Bonds. It is mostly between Student and Padawan, and it is a long standing tradition in some sects. My master knows it, while we didn't use it that much, but his master used it with him almost daily. So far as I know it goes back several 'generations'."
Funny, I didn't read anything about it. Must not be 'politically correct' or however you say that in Jedi terms.
Oh, by the way, the door is lit up. When did that happen? As much as I want to go over and give the double-door a good push or see if a Revan moment will pop up in my head, I can't help but feel restrained by Ahsoka. Not in that she is caging me or anything, but it just feels… wrong… to go on ahead with her like this. She had just as much a part in us getting this far as I did, if I'm right in that opening the door required two trials.
-She has been out of it ever since she passed her trial.- I hear in my head as Tree-Hugger's voice. -She encountered something that shook her up horribly. This is actually much better than how she was earlier.-
"How much-"
-Don't respond.- The voice commands strongly. I snap my mouth shut. -She hasn't said anything about what it was she saw or felt. She is tough and stubborn and hardheaded as the best of them, but no amount of training can prepare you for something that takes your insides and twists. Almost like her body chemistry is out of whack, but more than that. Her energies are… unstable.- Tree-Hugger sighs sadly. Along with his words is a deep emotion of concern and worry, but also acceptance at the end. -Unfortunately the only cure is time. She will be fine.-
"What do we do?" I whisper quietly as I can.
Instead of words, I feel a mental slap… or an emotional one. Ok, Tree-Hugger needs to lay off of the mental talking crap, it feels weird. -Stay with her. Keep an eye on her, do not let her out of your sight. I'll go on ahead.- I turn on him and open my mouth to protest. -I'll be careful.-
Before I have time to say anything, Tree-Hugger puts his hands on the double door and pushes it open. I don't see what's inside, but he walks in anyway. Which leaves me with Girly.
Great…
I don't do sappy.
With a sigh I walk over and stand beside her. I gaze at her and observes how her posture is… defeated, exhausted… even old. Her eyes are distant. The image already is wrong. She may not be as energetic as she may have been a few years back, not that I'd know, but she isn't old either. She should be standing firm as always, snapping to do things the very instant things happen, keeping right along with the blows, and slapping me in the back of the head. Now sitting on the ground crumpled like a… I don't know. Noodle? No, bad analogy. Just something bad that sits on the ground crumpled! I'll think of something later.
Whatever I was she encountered was bad. It's not just her eyes and posture that is out of whack, it's how she feels. I've never been into the mumbo jumbo of how people feel in an almost 'radar sense', but the atmosphere around her feels sick. The last time I felt this way was around a random person I passed by on the street who was mentally sick in the messed up sense.
Now… What the heck am I supposed to do to fix this? I hate sappy, and I have no clue what to do with… this. I'm not a nurse, doctor, psychiatrist, or even a rocket scientist. I'm a stupid, reckless, mouthy guy just shy of adult hood who has had his head poked and prodded by about every coincidence known to man. Considering all the 'mind' stuff I have to deal with, I should be a genius on this subject by now!
But I'm not.
"I'm sorry…"
I blink out of my thoughts at the whisper. "What?" I ask in the same quiet voice.
Ahsoka looks at her shaking hands as though she is inspecting a fingernail, but I promise she can't make anything out with how she is shaking. "I saw you and Master Anakin fighting…" Oh. Ok, that's odd. Definitely an illusion. "I tried to get you two to stop… but you wouldn't. You both just kept hacking away at each other… You truly meant to kill each other. I had to step in myself."
"Ok?"
"I went for you."
Ah, ok, let's put this in a picture. She sees her team fighting. She tries to stop us, we don't, and she jumps in to stop it. She goes after me, and I'm guessing she either made the fight pause, stopped it, or… "Did you kill me?"
She shakes her head.
"Did you come after my sexy illusion to hurt me?" I smirk. "Please tell me you didn't go for the face."
"No, no…" A small tug on her lips is all I get. "And don't describe yourself as sexy… It sounds stupid coming from you."
"Wha-!" I act hurt. "I'm ashamed!"
"No, you're not."
"Yeah, your right. I couldn't care less." I admit. "But really, you did what you had to do. I get that. If you ever see Tree-Hugger and I truly trying to kill each other, feel free to punch my lights out. Or slap me. That hurts about as much."
The memory I just purposefully refreshed in her makes her lips curl slightly higher, but she doesn't respond. Instead it looks like some of the weight is off her shoulders. She still looks messed up and distant, but less… uh- hurting, I think. Less is on her mind at the very least.
Not sure what else to do, I sit down beside her and… just let her be the one to strike conversation. Which she doesn't do, so we just sit quietly.
Tree-Hugger returns a little later. Ahsoka is looking better, still gloomy, but better. We stands up at his approach. "You guys good?" He asks. I glance at girly out of the corner of my eye. She nods.
I let Girly take the first steps before me, and then I enter the next room along with both of them. Almost immediately the image of Revan appears walking just in front of me beside Tree-Hugger. Unbeknownst to each other, Revan and Tree-Hugger both walk down the same path until at a lower level they stop in front of a round pedestal. The pedestal itself is several feet in diameter and a couple feet high. Revan puts a hand on it, and the pedestal in my memory lights up.
I do the same and Revan disappears into the wind.
On the pedestal a humanoid-alien appears. The species reminds me of the Jar Jar thing, except the protruding eyes are on both sides of a very squished head. And here I was thinking Jar Jar was ugly… It talks to us in a language I don't recognize. Sounds like its screeching and hollering.
"Varus, you get anything?" Tree-Hugger asks me.
I shake my head. The holographic alien cocks its head to the side and talks again. This time sounds completely different, more like flowing water in a way, but still, I have no idea what it is trying to say.
"I have no idea…" I mutter. "Does this thing come up with a dictionary?"
Again, it talks, but now the language sounds crackly and like someone is coughing and sputtering.
"Sounds like it's trying to pinpoint our language." Tree-Hugger says.
The holographic image looks to him. "Do you understand?" It says.
"Yes." Tree-Hugger confirms.
It nods and looks to me. "Language, processed. Welcome Miraluka."
"Miraluka?" I laugh. "I think it needs to recycle its language another few times. That's not my name."
Tree-Hugger shushes me, and the hologram continues, "Why are you here, Miraluka?"
"We are looking for the Star Forge." Tree-Hugger says.
The hologram continues looking me in the eye and doesn't respond to him. "Uh…" I say. "We are looking for the Star Forge?"
It nods. "Your predecessor has come twice for it. We sense his touch on you, Miraluka."
Ok, seriously, why does he keep calling me that? Does that mean 'guest' or 'friend' in his language?
"You have passed the tests. We shall show you the legacy of the Infinite." The hologram grows smaller and disappears, and in its place appears a three-dimensional map of the galaxy. Tree-Hugger whips out a data pad and hits buttons. He says he is recording it.
The map is made up of millions and millions of tiny stars. Out of the map, five dots are circled in red and pulled out of the map. These five dots line up on the side and magnify to show five planets, and a bunch of symbols on the planets that they say are coordinates.
"Where's the Star Forge? Tatooine. Kashyyyk. Manaan. Korriban. Malachor V before it blew up. What is this? " Ahsoka wonders. I stiffen at her words.
Oh…
One star formation resides within a tomb of Korriban.
One resides within the caves of Tatooine.
One within the waters of Manaan.
One in the darkness of Kashyyk.
And one on a destroyed ship in Malachor V.
I see a cocoon of metal by a star.
My dream had showed these… Except my dream showed a ship in Malachor and not a place in Coruscant.
The same ship I keep seeing in my nightmares and dreams… but that's beside the point.
I smile as hard as I can. I really hope they don't kill me. "Um… guys…" I begin.
A few seconds later girly smacks me upside the head, yells at nothing in pure and utter aggravation, and storms out. Tree-Hugger just stands there silently trying not to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation.
How was I supposed to know those things I saw were places we needed to go?
"Let's go." He says and walks away. I follow along.
"We came here for NOTHING! And you know what the sad part is? I'M NOT EVEN SURPRISED!" Ahsoka yells down the hall at me. I wince. With the way things happen around me, no, I can't say I am either.
"Goodbye, Miraluka." The hologram calls after me, and then disappears into its base.
-It would be best to not upset her for a while- Tree-Hugger's voice tells me.
"Can you stop that…" I grumble. "I don't need more things in my head than I already do."
Tree-Hugger looks at me curiously, "It is a strong technique to learn."
"Yeah, well… another time. When I feel ready."
Maris woke up to the sound of a beating door. She groaned and wiped her puffy face. Her head ached, her body was twisted from sleeping on the hard floor, and whoever it was knocking was entirely too loud! The last time she felt like this was when her Master had wanted her to try some alcohol to test out how much she could take without being affected.
The person knocked hard enough to beat down the whole penthouse. "I'm coming!" Maris hollered. She turned over onto her back and stared at the ceiling a moment. Faint recollection of the last few days washed over her clouded mind. The recollection was as short as the days themselves. She couldn't recall doing anything except mourning and trying to take care of herself in this dark apartment.
Of course, she couldn't. Not on her own. A couple of their age-group came by periodically to check on her. Ahsoka had requested Eria check on her daily, and Falon to come by when he had the chance. A few from around the apartment complex would knock gently, let themselves in, and fix tea or something small for her to eat if she hadn't already.
By the Force… the last few weeks had been messed up.
The person knocked again. "Coming! Coming!" Maris threw herself up and stumbled over her own feet. The lack of light and not eating properly on her own was bearing down on her, but honestly… she felt better. She could at least think of her master without breaking down and collapsing in tears now. Her mind was clearer, stronger.
She opened the door.
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