Chapter 22

We're All Right

Hermione was unsure of the source of her nervousness. She had just spent the previous night pledging to make things right with Ron, but now she didn't want to face him. But he was her friend and they needed to work things out. With that and the knowledge that he would have no other visitors for at least half an hour (because everyone was at breakfast), she slipped into the infirmary.

She was surprised to see him sit up and greet her with a sleepy wave of his hand. Ron wasn't known to be an early-riser. "Good morning," she greeted softly as she pulled up a chair next to Ron. "How're you feeling?"

"Better", he answered. His voice was gruff and she could tell he had not been awake very long.

She smiled warmly. "Good." She wished she had better prepared for this conversation. "So this may not have been the best birthday you've ever had?"

The redhead scoffed. "No, definitely not." They fell silent for a few moments before continuing. "Thank you - for the jumper. Now people won't have to see me play to know I'm the 'World's Best Keeper'." They both smiled weakly before he continued. "I only read some of your letter. I... I got upset and chucked it against the wall once I got to the part where you told me I had been inconsiderate of your feelings."

"Which time?" she asked, knowing that talking point had come up several times in the letter.

"The first time apparently. I was just so angry. I didn't need to be scolded on my birthday."

"I wasn't trying to scold you, Ron," Hermione tried to explain. She had worked so hard to try to make the letter not sound accusatory.

He nodded, "I'm sure you weren't. But with the way things have been between us, that's what it felt like."

It was her turn to nod, "I understand."

He forced a smile, "I liked the part where you apologized. Was there more of that in the letter?"

"There was," she chuckled mirthlessly. "There was a lot the letter covered. I'm glad to know you read part of it at least. But I think we need to cover more than just the bit you read."

"I agree. Would you like to start off?"

The witch inhaled deeply, "I haven't been myself - you know that. You, Harry, and Ginny have all known that since the summer holiday. I apologize for my mood and behavior, but I'm truly just... terrified." She paused for a moment to collect herself. "I knew coming into this year that bad things were going to happen. Not that bad things haven't happened before, they have, but I knew this was it. We're in the middle of something big. War is coming and there is no way to stop it."

Ron interrupted her, "Come on Hermione, how can you possibly know that?"

"Because I can," she shrugged. "Look, I know that you and Harry have a very specific image of who I am - logical, knowledgeable, book-smart. I am those things, but all of my reading has taught me to trust my instincts. I know that we're in danger. When we lost Sirius..." she trailed off.

Ron nodded, "I know what you mean. Things suddenly became real."

She nodded in agreement. "I loved Sirius. Watching him die - something changed in me. That day at the Ministry changed everything. I'd have nightmares about it. And I couldn't stop imagining what it would feel like if we lost you or Harry," her throat began to tighten and she closed her eyes to hold back the tears. "To be completely honest, imagining it tears me apart. I've let these things pick at me. I can't stop being affected by it. I don't want to snipe at my friends or be upset, but it was just so hard to deal with. My only concern was keeping you all safe and it was draining. Especially when we would fight."

"You usually won those," he commented quietly, seeming to recall her cutting words.

"That didn't make it any less draining... And then that whole thing with Lavender..."

Ron looked away from her at this point. She debated asking him to look at her. This was a serious issue, and she wanted to make sure she had his full attention. But judging by the heat creeping up his neck, she knew he was as focused on the subject as she was.

Taking another deep breath, she continued, "I had feelings for you, Ron. I had mentioned Slughorn's party and we seemed to be on the same page, then we fought at the quidditch match, then I come back to find you snogging her. And as if that weren't enough, you acted completely cold to me after."

"You never invited me to Slughorn's party! And you were acting cold as well!"

"I was heartbroken, Ron! Don't tell me you don't know what that feels like - need I mention Viktor Krum?"

"I was not jeal-"

"Yes, you were!" the witch cut him off before he could finish the sentence. "Look Ron, I'm sorry, all right? You're right. Okay? I didn't formally invite you to Slughorn's party. I know that. But you knew I had feelings for you. I was heartbroken, okay? On top of everything else I had been feeling - fear, anger, anxiety - I got to add feeling heartbroken and betrayed to the list."

"We were always just dancing around each other, weren't we?" he admitted.

"Yes, we were," she agreed. "I felt like I lost my best friends. As much as Harry tried to stay neutral, it was hard for him. I felt betrayed. But I don't want to feel that anymore. I love you two, Ron. I don't want to be angry anymore. Being angry will just make protecting all of us harder."

"I don't want to be angry anymore either. I've missed you, Hermione."

"I've missed you too."

"Have you talked to Harry about all this?"

The witch nodded, "We talked last night before turning in. I told him I would come try to talk to you this morning."

"I'm glad you did. It was nice having you be the first thing I saw when I woke up."

The comment made Hermione slightly uncomfortable. She knew Ron was with Lavender, but he had not called Lavender's name last night. Deciding the comment wasn't worth evaluating, she asked a question that had been in her mind all night. "So, we're all right?"

"We're all right."

She smiled and gave his hand a light squeeze. "Good. Now I've got to head to breakfast, but I'll try to stop by later." She rose and dropped his hand. "Oh and Ron, I'm not going to mediate any arguments between the three of you - you, Harry, and Draco are just going to have to learn to get along. He is my boyfriend. I told Harry that at the very least, you two need to learn to trust my judgment."

Hermione hurried out the door, not wanting to give him an opportunity to respond. If they were going to fight about it, Ron at least needed to be well rested.

Draco's eyes found her the moment she entered the Great Hall and would not leave her at all during breakfast. She had met has gaze and given him a small smile, but he it had not been enough to satisfy him. He knew she had gone up to visit Weasley this morning and was eager to know what had transpired. He hated himself for getting worked up over the situation, but he hadn't seen her or spoken to her in about 24 hours. Yes, he realized how pathetic it made him to know how long it had been, but for all he knew Hermione was snogging Weasley in the infirmary and getting ready to break up with him. He didn't want to think that but after everything they had all been through, he couldn't help but think Weasley might be the better choice for her.

He was only slightly relieved when he felt his pocket watch heat up.

"RoR after breakfast?"

After sending back his response, he gulped down the rest of his drink and all but sprinted to their beloved room.

He didn't have to wait long before Hermione showed up smiling knowingly.

"What?" he asked narrowing his eyes at her.

"Nothing," she shrugged. "I was just thinking about how confused all your house mates looked when you barreled out of the Great Hall, nearly knocking people over." Her smile became even bigger. "Eager to see me?"

It was Draco's turn to shrug. "I guess I may have missed you a bit."

She walked over and kissed his lips lightly. It both calmed and concerned Draco. It was sweet. But was it meant to be chaste or a way to soften the blow of a breakup?

"I missed you too," she took a seat in her chair. "So Ron is all right. First he drank expired love potion, and so Harry took Ron to Slughorn for an antidote. After Ron was cured of the love potion - from Romila Vane meant for Harry, by the way - Slughorn opened up a bottle of mead which had been poisoned. Slughorn was in shock when Ron went into convulsions, and so Harry leapt into action, found a bezoar, and got Ron to swallow it."

Draco felt his chest constrict. Her best friend had almost died because of him. He tried to brush off the guilt. "Wait, so Slughorn tried to poison Weasley?"

"No, Slughorn said it had been a gift and was intending to give it to Professor Dumbledore."

"What? So why did Slughorn still have it?"

Hermione shrugged, "It isn't really Slughorn's nature to get something luxurious and just hand it off to someone else, is it?"

"I suppose not."

"So I spoke to Ron this morning. Everything seems to be all right. He even seemed to admit some fault."

"That's awfully big of Weasley," Draco said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Oh don't start. I already to both him and Harry that I'm not going to mediate. They're my best friends, you're my boyfriend and you all just need to deal with it."

"Am I still?" the blonde asked before he could stop himself. He watched her freeze and saw hurt in her eyes, instantly regretting his comment.

"What does that mean, Draco?"

"I didn't mean... I... Look..." he paused and heaved a sigh, looking away from her. "Okay, so seeing the letter in your mind yesterday may have been a bit disconcerting for me. I know you loved him, Hermione. I was afraid that your reconciliation might be the end for us. Not that I could blame you for choosing him. I've been terrible to you so long. I still can't believe we were together in the first place." He finally fell silent and waited for her response. He wasn't sure what he should be expecting. After a few moments, he finally looked at her. She seemed pensive.

"Stand up," she commanded as she rose from her seat. He did as she asked and let her adjust his stance until she spoke again. "Try to enter my mind."

"What?" he asked disbelievingly.

"Try to enter my mind. I need to practice my Occlucmency, and I need you to know something. This will get both things done. See if you can enter my mind."

"Hermione-" Draco started to protest.

"Please?" she asked. "I think it's best if you experience it."

He held one hand up to show he would concede. He exhaled and focused on entering her mind. He was surprised to find it was much more difficult than it had been the previous morning. She truly must have just been distracted. After a full minute of trying and failing, he felt himself growing a bit impatient.

"Having some trouble?" she asked rather smugly.

"Just a bit," he said coolly as he continued to scavenge her mind. Finally he seemed to find a way in.

He was back in the Potions classroom. He could hear Hermione's voice cutting through the air coming from the spot where he was standing. "It's the most powerful love potion in the world. It can be identified by its pearly sheen and the steam spirals rising from it. And it's supposed to smell differently to each of us, according to what attracts us." He could start to smell the scents as she got ready to identify them. "For example, I smell freshly mown grass and new parchment and..." Suddenly he could smell his cologne wafting from the cauldron.

He pulled out of her mind and she gave him a small smile. "I guess I've had feelings for you longer than we knew."

He hadn't really had any room to form his own thoughts while he was in her mind, but now he could feel the joy overtaking him. He closed the space between them and caressed her cheek. Looking down in her eyes, he could see there was nothing but seriousness. While he wanted to leap for joy, he knew he was coming off much more intensely than that. He pulled her into a kiss and they soon melted together.

"So, we're all right?" she asked as they broke apart.

He couldn't stop the chuckle that escaped. "We're perfect."

"Come in," Severus called before the visitor could even knock. He felt no surprise seeing Miss Granger and Draco walk in together.

"How can I help you?" he asked the two teenagers.

"Have you heard about Ron?" the witch asked taking a seat.

"I have. But I can assure you, Miss Granger, I had nothing to do with poisoning him."

"I know that, Professor," she said seeming to shrug off his sarcasm.

He wasn't sure when that happened, and he wasn't sure how he felt about it. Certainly, he couldn't have Miss Granger cowering in fear like his other students, but he worried she might become too comfortable with him. Though who he was worried about, he wasn't sure...

"But Hagrid had mentioned overhearing you and Professor Dumbledore having some sort of argument. You had said something about him asking too much...? And that you wouldn't continue on with something anymore?" she gave him a concerned look. It wasn't suspicious or accusatory. Merely concerned.

"While I understand it is hard to restrain oneself when one has extraordinarily large ears, tell your dear friend he should really mind his own business. While I will admit that Dumbledore and I had been arguing, I cannot tell you what the subject was. Just as I have made promises to you two, I have made promises to Dumbledore." He had debated whether or not he should tell them that Dumbledore was dying, but came to the conclusion that it was not the right time. Draco still had a mission to accomplish. If he told them the truth, it theoretically could make Draco's job easier but more likely than not it would make Draco feel more guilt over killing a dying man. Draco was not a monster.

"Though I cannot share with you the particulars, know that I am still very much part of the Order and not a threat to anyone."

"I never doubted that, Professor." He knew she meant it. It surprised him to see how much faith she had placed in him. "It's just with Katie and now Ron, we thought you might have some information on the attacks."

He glanced at the interlocked hands of the two teenagers. "I can assure you, Miss Granger, I know of no one at the Malfoy Manor in the Dark Lord's inner circle making any sort of move. Whoever is attacking is not currently in the Manor." Not technically a lie. Draco was in Hogwarts.

She seemed to accept his response as a valid answer. "Thank you, Professor."

"Just know that everything is all right. Trust that if that changes, I will let the two of you know."

She nodded and rose to leave the office. Severus shot a knowing look at the young wizard. He could only hope that Draco understood what he was trying to communicate.

He felt a small twinge of guilt and a greater twinge of anxiety. He did not want to lie to Miss Granger's face, but it was not his place to tell her Draco's secret. If the relationship was going to last, it was Draco who needed to be honest with her. After Draco told her the truth, Severus would tell her that Dumbledore was dying and explain the whole tale to her. Draco wouldn't need to know until after the deed was done. Draco needed to at least try to to fulfill the Dark Lord's order to try to save his family. Severus felt anxiety about his guilt. Granger seemed to be getting attached to him. He wasn't sure how he should feel about it. All he knew is that he should really stop pledging loyalty to teenagers.