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137. Nerves
Castiel was certain that something was up. Rose had promised to talk to Dean but she hadn't returned with any information, nor had Dean given any indication that he had an inkling of Castiel's desire. The ex-angel was suspicious, sure that his lover and friend were conspiring behind his back, but he just didn't know what they were planning. Many times, he'd thought of just confronting Dean and asking what was wrong. But he knew when Dean was planning something and so Castiel was content to just leave things be for the moment.
Finally, after Dean had been shifting and fidgeting nervously all day, Castiel decided to confront him. He waited until they were in their room together before closing their door and turning to face Dean.
"What's going on, Dean?" he said. Dean jumped and shot him a guilty look.
"Nothing!" Dean said quickly. "Why do you think that something's up?"
Castiel raised his eyebrows. Did Dean really think that would fool him?
"Don't try and trick me, Dean," he said firmly, advancing on Dean. Dean stood his ground, though he looked more nervous than Castiel had seen him in a long time. "Now, tell me what's wrong, Dean."
Dean ran a hand through his short blond spikes.
"Crap," he muttered. "Just bear with me, Cas. Okay?"
Castiel nodded, taking a step back to give Dean space. Dean took a deep breath.
"I love you," he said. "I love you so much, Cas, and it – well, it scares me. 'Cause the only other person I've loved this much is Sam. And – that means that you can hurt me. If you walked away or you died…I dunno what I'd do."
"You've told me this," Castiel said gently. Dean groaned and looked away.
"I suck at this," he said. "Look, I know you deserve a really emotional, sappy, chick flick moment and I'm trying but I –"
"Dean, just say it," Castiel urged. "What do you want to say?"
Dean took a few more deep breaths. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a small, folded pouch and handed it to Castiel.
"I'm not getting down on one knee," he warned. Frowning, Castiel flipped open the pouch to reveal a fake FBI badge with his picture on it.
"What is this, Dean?" he said.
"Just – look on the bottom. And don't laugh, okay?"
Castiel turned the badge over and his eyes widened when he saw the gleaming gold ring that he'd been eyeing at the jewellery store taped to the back. Butterflies sprouting in his stomach, he turned the badge back over and a wide grin spread across his face when he saw the name: Castiel Winchester.
"Obviously you're not gonna use that on cases, since we can't use our real names," Dean rambled. "But I thought it'd be nice for you to have some ID with your real name on it, even if you won't use it – that is, if you'll take my last name. Shit, I suck at this…"
"If you're asking me to marry you, Dean," Castiel said in amusement, hot blood pumping through his body, "then my answer is yes."
Dean froze, staring at Castiel in shock.
"You – you will?" he said quietly. Castiel nodded, a wide grin splitting his face.
"Of course I will, Dean," he said, removing the ring from the back of the fake ID and sliding it onto his ring finger. "And I'm sure that you knew that as well, if you've been conspiring with Rose as I suspect you have."
Dean stared at him for another moment before bursting into laughter. He crossed over to Castiel, threw his arms around the ex-angel and hugged him so tightly that Castiel was lifted off his feet. Castiel was momentarily disoriented when he landed back on the ground and Dean took advantage of this to press his lips to Castiel's, kissing him harder than Castiel could remember. Castiel wrapped his arms around Dean's neck and kissed him back just as hard, pouring every little drop of happiness and joy and love that he felt into it. When they broke apart, Dean pulled Castiel back against him, his cheek resting on Castiel's dark hair.
"God, I love you so much, Cas," he murmured, pressing a kiss to Castiel's head. "You're gonna be mine. And I'm gonna be yours. Forever."
"I've always been yours, Dean," Castiel said quietly, nuzzling into Dean's neck. "And I always will be."