=/\=
At first, the energy discharges picked up on long range sensors seemed to be an intriguing puzzle, tantalizing a captain who was always eager to explore unexplained phenomenon, rather than a source of possible danger to Voyager. The discharges were located almost six light years ahead of the ship, presumably a safe distance away. Seven had been on the holodeck when she was summoned to Astrometrics to examine the problem with Captain Janeway, Tom Paris, and Tuvok. "We weren't able to determine what they are," Tom reported to Icheb, B'Elanna, and Harry at dinner a few hours later. "We did discover that this neighborhood is full of unusual amounts of subspace radiation and metallic debris. We'll have to navigate carefully for the next week or so."
Unexplained phenomenon fascinated Cadet Icheb as well. "I'll spend a little more time in Astrometrics to investigate this myself," Icheb said. "I'll let you know if I find out anything."
"That sounds like a good plan," B'Elanna replied. "I'd rather not spend a lot of time crawling through Voyager's innards to repair her right now." Ruefully, she looked down at her swelling abdomen.
Icheb had to smile as the image of a very pregnant Chief Engineer crawling through the narrow Jeffries tubes rose up in his mind's eye. "If you need my assistance, I'll be happy to do the crawling and repairing for you," he offered. "I'm sure the captain and Seven will authorize me to help you. It will be good experience. I can write a paper about it for the Academy."
"I'd rather you found the cause before there's any damage to the ship, Icheb!" Harry exclaimed. "The captain will probably send me down to help with diagnostics, which means I'll have to do a lot of that crawling with you!"
Everyone laughed, but Icheb was to remember the conversation later as another case of "famous last words."
=/\=
When Tom came to Astrometrics to invite Seven to the 'surprise' baby shower, he invited Icheb to come, too. Icheb was secretly flattered, although what he verbalized was, "Isn't this what is generally called a 'hen party?' Shouldn't only the female friends attend?"
Tom laughed and responded, "Not on Voyager it isn't! We're all one big happy family on this ship, aren't we? And family members all get to attend a family party."
"Then I'll be happy to come. Do you have any suggestions for a gift for the baby?"
"Why don't you discuss it with Seven. With your combined Borg brain power, I'm sure you'll come up with something great for our little girl." Tom replied. While Tom was speaking to both of them, Seven never said whether or not she'd come. As Icheb halfway expected, after he'd wrapped up his gifts of replicated children's picture books for the baby (which he'd researched by himself, since Seven was never available whenever he wanted to talk to her about presents), he attended the shower on his own. She never showed up for the party.
Even though her absence made Icheb feel a bit out of sorts while he walked to the Mess Hall, once he arrived, he was swept up in the joy of everyone who was attending the festivities. As always, they had that "touch of the Delta Quadrant," thanks to Neelix, that a baby shower on Earth wouldn't have had. "No one in the Alpha Quadrant has ever had the dubious opportunity to enjoy Spicy Leola Root Crudités a la Neelix," Tom laughingly explained. He seemed to be having just as much fun as B'Elanna when they opened the presents. Everyone was twitting Tom about having to change the diapers Harry presented to the couple. "What are you talking about? I've changed plenty of diapers in my time, right, Sam and Naomi?"
Poor Naomi blushed crimson, but Sam agreed Tom was a "great babysitter," which Marla Gilmore seconded. "And Icheb has turned into a fantastic changer of diapers, too," Marla added, which made Icheb's face feel flushed, even though he knew it was true. He'd become an expert, thanks to his work at the day care center, as well as being part of their "family" on Quarra.
B'Elanna and Tom were both enthused by the books he'd picked out for the baby. A couple were classic toddler picture books, "Good Night, Moon" and "Flotter Meets Trevis." He'd also replicated a couple of Winnie the Pooh books, which he'd taken the time to read before wrapping them. Icheb enjoyed the rustle and the feel of the pages as he turned each leaf over once he'd read it. He had no memory of being read to by his birth parents from his own early childhood days. For all he knew, the entire Brunali library of children's books had been destroyed by the Borg during the attacks which had devastated that civilization. Of course, from the way she'd treated him during his brief return to his home planet, it was possible his mother hadn't bothered to read to him when he was young. Icheb had enjoyed reading books to children at the day care center on Quarra, however, which led him to explore the ones in Voyager's database. During the baby shower, he regaled Tom by reciting excerpts from the Pooh books from memory, when he wasn't quoting Shakespeare and other authors he'd discovered through his Academy literature course.
"I love it, Icheb! You can come read to our little one any time," Tom said, applauding one of his efforts. Icheb was very pleased by this.
Icheb had a good time at the baby shower. It would have been a great time if Seven had joined in the fun, but when he left the party, he was on his own again.
=/\=
Icheb had to make good on his promise to help with repairs to Voyager when more of the still-unexplained energy discharges, and the shockwaves they generated, damaged Voyager. When, as Harry had predicted, Icheb crawled with him through various Jeffries tubes to complete a long list of diagnostics B'Elanna had assigned, Harry described what had happened on the bridge after the ship's warp drive was knocked out. "Chakotay tried to relieve the tension on the bridge by saying, 'If they are weapons, they don't seem to be directed at us.' And then the captain answered him with: 'Or whoever's firing them is a lousy shot.'"
Icheb's response was a weak chuckle. Without warp drive, they couldn't get the ship out of the path of weapon fire very easily. It was no laughing matter.
As that day wore on, Seven confirmed the energy discharges were warheads emerging through a subspace barrier, which is why they'd been so difficult to detect. She had measured subtle gravimetric distortions when the warheads burst into normal space, but until the Astrometrics sensors were recalibrated to isolate the effect before emergence, Voyager would continue to be vulnerable. Icheb showed up early for his duty shift to help Seven develop a warning system, but she didn't praise him for his efforts as he hoped. She obviously trusted him to do his work well, though, since she left him on his own in Astrometrics without telling him where she was going.
The next day, when Seven strolled into Astrometrics several minutes late, after Icheb had worked there on his own all night, Chakotay was there, too. Icheb played an automated warning beacon he'd discovered. "You have entered subspace munitions range 4-3-4. Evacuate immediately. You have entered subspace munitions range 4-3-4 . . ."
"We've been sending out emergency hails, but so far, no response," Chakotay informed Seven. "Whoever's conducting these tests could be dozens of light years away. Any progress detecting their warheads?"
Icheb noted Seven's discomfort when she admitted she had not. The commander had expected this answer, since Icheb had advised him Seven never mentioned she had when he'd arrived for duty the evening before. Chakotay said he thought she looked "a little distracted," and added, "It's not like you to be late for a duty shift. Rough night?"
Seven responded, "Not at all," but Icheb noted her lips quirking up in a secret smile. Afterwards, Icheb wondered if that was why, after the commander had left them to return to the bridge, he said flippantly, "Better late than never," a quote he'd learned from reading an ancient Roman scholar's work, A History of Rome.
Seven did not appreciate his attempt at humor. "You're relieved!" she spat out.
Icheb felt the rebuke keenly. His face must have shown this, because she then added, more gently, "Get some rest."
Despite her oblique apology to him, Icheb slunk out of Astrometrics, more convinced than ever that the mother/son relationship they'd established had somehow disintegrated. What had he done to make her turn away from him like this?
=/\=
Icheb was hard at work in "Borg Central," compiling research for the oral report he was scheduled to present to Captain Janeway in a several weeks, required for his completion of his course in Early Starfleet History, when the ship shuddered. Icheb was knocked off his feet and landed on the computer console. He activated the communication link to Astrometrics, ready to offer his assistance to Seven if she requested his presence. Before he could say anything, he overheard Commander Chakotay order Seven, "We need those sensor calibrations."
After a brief time lag, probably undetectable to human ears, but easily perceived by Icheb's Borg-enhanced hearing, Seven responded, "I'll need a moment to return to my station."
This was a surprise. Seven was supposed to be on duty in Astrometrics this shift, and she hadn't requested Icheb to relieve her if her she'd been called to work elsewhere. After Icheb heard Chakotay's somewhat satirical response, "That would be a good idea," he opened another link to the bridge to follow what had happened to the ship. Because of Seven's rebuke to him earlier that day, Icheb was reluctant to go to Astrometrics unless she summoned him.
A few minutes later, Icheb had to hold onto the console when Voyager was hit by still another shockwave. From the helm, Tom reported, "Hull fracture, Deck 12." That was an Engineering deck. Icheb could tell, from the tight sound of his voice, Tom was worried about his wife. Seven still had not called him to Astrometrics. Should he go there, despite her possible disapproval, or should he offer assistance to B'Elanna in Engineering?
Hull fractures were serious. Despite his desire to help Seven, Icheb decided he was needed on Deck 12. He shut down his presentation research and communication links to the bridge and Astrometrics before opening a channel to Engineering. "Lieutenant Torres. May I assist you?"
"YES!" she shouted. "Get down here as quickly as you can, Icheb! We could use your help."
=/\=
After working to repair the hull fracture with Lieutenant Torres's staff, Icheb reported to Astrometrics. He no longer cared if Seven wanted him there or not. Until they knew how to get away from this munitions testing ground, he should be there.
Astrometrics was empty when he arrived, but Seven had left the instructions on how to detect the shockwaves which were bedeviling Voyager. He isolated subspace bond omicron theta, as she'd indicated, and reviewed the sensor logs documenting the barrage which had just ended. The gravimetric distortions that marked a warhead's emergence from subspace, which they'd discovered previously, were easy to see now that he knew where to look. Icheb went to work. Whether she wanted him to or not, he was going to do what he could to protect their ship from further damage.
=/\=
When Seven returned to Astrometrics from wherever she'd been, Icheb was pleased to report, "I've analyzed the sensor data from that last barrage and refined your detection method. We'll be able to see the weapons 10.3 seconds earlier."
She glanced at his data, before walking away, commenting, "The captain will be pleased."
'Seven really must not want my help,' he thought. 'What is happening?' After a pause, Icheb finally asked her, "Seven, have I offended you?"
She turned to face him then, and he could see a grim expression on her face. He feared what her answer to him must be, but it wasn't what he expected to hear. "No, You've done nothing wrong, Icheb. I was negligent in my duties. As a result, Voyager was nearly destroyed." She paused, then said, hesitantly, "I was hoping you could provide a quotation to help alleviate my guilt."
"I . . . I can't think of one," he admitted. "But I would be happy to search the database."
She smiled at him. "That won't be necessary. Stay here until I return."
"Where are you going?"
"To correct an error," she sighed, and left Astrometrics again.
=/\=
Icheb was still on duty in Astrometrics, waiting for Seven to return from correcting her error, when the Doctor contacted him. "Icheb, Seven is with me in Sickbay. She's had a bit of a problem while running a holodeck program. I've decided to keep her under observation for a few hours. I've already informed the captain. When your shift is over, or if you need to leave Astrometrics for any reason, contact Stellar Cartography. Megan Delaney will relieve you."
"Is Seven's condition serious? Should I come to see her?"
"It's nothing for you to worry about. Just a little . . . programming glitch. I'll be releasing her soon. Just carry on with your work. If there's any change, I'll contact you."
It wasn't easy for Icheb to keep his mind on his scans, but he managed. It was important. He had to remain vigilant for as long as they were in range of the warheads in the testing range. That would be his prime duty until warp drive was restored and they could get Voyager out of this dangerous region of space.
=/\=
Stardate 54689.9 Personal Log Entry, Cadet Icheb
The Doctor called me in this morning and examined my cortical array. I asked him if this had anything to do with why Seven had been acting so strangely lately. We were fortunate she came around just in time to save us from the subspace warhead that had locked onto Voyager as soon as Lieutenant Torres succeeded in restoring warp drive. Seven was able to extract the detonator by transporting it out of the explosive device, rendering it harmless, but it was a very close call. The Doctor hemmed and hawed the way he does, and finally admitted that his examination of me had "something to do" with it, but he wouldn't tell me anything more.
Seven showed up in Borg Central, and I insisted we speak. I asked her if she was regretting her offer to adopt me, and, as I promised myself I would, I told her I would "understand" if she didn't want to go through with it any more. She looked very upset and said, "Of course, I still want to adopt you." She apologized for being so distant from me for so long. "It wasn't just you, Icheb. I was distant with everyone. I had some . . . personal issues . . . I needed to work out. I chose to create holodeck simulations to do that. It may not have been the wisest course of action. I'm sorry I lost patience with you. You didn't do anything wrong. I did. I have resolved to correct the error."
She clasped my shoulder with her left arm, the way she did several weeks ago when she told me she was my mother, after she informed me our memories had been tampered with. "I meant what I said to you on Quarra, Icheb. You are my son. This experience reminds me that no one is perfect, mothers, included. Family members can hurt each other sometimes, but it doesn't mean they don't care for each other. It's like the captain tells always tells us. We are all members of Voyager's family. And you and I are also a family."
Her skin tone became paler than it usually is, although it wasn't turning gray, like Borg skin. She sat down heavily and began to rub her forehead over the cortical node I gave to her. I became alarmed and offered to call the Doctor, but she forbade me from contacting him. She sighed then, and admitted that strong emotional upsets weren't "good for her." I asked her to explain, and after a little pleading on my part, she finally did.
At first, when she collapsed on the holodeck and called the Doctor for aid, they both thought her cortical node was starting to fail again. That would be terrible, since I don't have one to donate to her anymore. I expressed remorse that the part I gave to her must be faulty.
She explained there is nothing wrong with her cortical node. It's actually working the way it's supposed to. The emotion inhibitor component prevents strong emotions. We already knew that, to a degree, since I became much more emotional after donating my cortical node to her. However, it doesn't just dampen emotions to make them less intense. When stimulation from strong, conflicting emotions become overwhelming, the component causes higher brain functions to shut down. The Doctor doesn't know if this could also threaten her life, but in order for her to experience normal human emotions, he'd have to reconfigure the node. He's willing to do that, but he told her it could be a difficult and lengthy process. "I declined the procedure, Icheb. The types of stimulation I was seeking weren't very good for me. Maternal attachments don't seem to be threatening. I may not be able to fully express how strong my motherly emotions are towards you, but rest assured, they are very strong. I simply need to be careful how I handle all of my emotions from now on."
After a little more prodding, she confided that her simulations had to do with "interpersonal relationships of the affectionate kind." In other words, she was trying to experience romantic love. That's the emotional stimulus which was too much for her cortical node to handle.
I was glad she finally confided in me. It actually explains a lot about how I've been reacting to emotional stimuli since I gave my cortical node to her. I gave up being able to communicate subvocally with other Borg when I did, but apparently I gained the ability to experience emotions the way other humanoid beings do. Maybe that had something to do with why I misread B'Elanna's friendliness to me as romantic overtures when we were overhauling Voyager. My un-restricted emotions ran away with me.
If I'd known about that trade-off beforehand, I would still have given my node to Seven to save her life. I'm the one who's benefited the most. Not only did I keep my mother alive, I will also be able to fall in love in the future without my neural network frying my biological brain. If I ever find someone whom I could fall in love with, that is. Except for Naomi and Aimee, everyone on Voyager is so much older than me!
I'm much too young to worry about that now, although I hope Voyager's travels will end soon enough for me to take advantage of this someday. If the trip does take three decades to complete, as our crew currently believes, I'll be almost fifty Federation Standard Years old before we arrive in the Alpha Quadrant. I'll be too old for romantic relationships!
=/\=