Pairing: Eren/Mikasa (with Mikasa and Armin as bros because we need more of that in the world)

Setting: Post Chapter 54

Words:2005

Rating: K

Notes: I'm so sorry I'm so bad at making things sad. I tried to make it sad and I couldn't do it very well but it's not super fluffy so I guess that's different than my normal ones lol I just really wanted to write one that focused on Mikasa and Armin's friendship because I feel like they are very close too and we never get to see that.

February 9th - Pain

Armin was used to staying in strange places, after all, the barracks were really the only real bedrooms he had slept in since he lived with his grandfather but an underground cave? This was new. It was always cold and wet, though at least it smelt nice, fresh, real.

He sighed, his hand propping his head up on the table, one lantern lighting up the small room. It was some kind of hideout. Levi didn't tell them much when he brought them there and didn't say much once he left too causing Armin to wonder how long they'd be stuck here in hiding. He knew he'd much rather have something to be doing; otherwise his mind would just drift to the mission. Chills went down his spine as disgust churned his stomach. He wished someone else was awake, someone to talk to.

He was actually surprised the others could sleep considering they all had to sleep on the stone floor but he could hear the soft sounds of breathing and Connie's snoring…well, that might've been Sasha.

Armin was about to join them, just try to sleep at least a little bit but an ever familiar sound caught his attention. He pushed himself to his feet and grabbed the lantern to head to the other room.

Jean was sprawled out on his back, halfway on his makeshift bed, and halfway on Armin's. Connie and Sasha were nearby with Hanji asleep by the door. Mikasa was curled up against the fall, her hands laid out on Eren's empty bed. Armin carefully made his way towards her.

He placed his hand down on Mikasa's shoulder, careful not to shake her, but wanting her to let her know he was there. Her eyes fluttered open, glossy and wet from the tears dripping down her face. He held his hand out to her, offering to help her up; he knew she was gonna get as much sleep as he was. He wasn't surprised when she grabbed onto him using his weight to help her up. Armin led her out of the "bedroom" and back to the room with the table he was sitting before. He placed the lantern down and took a seat on the bench, feeling Mikasa do the same.

"Couldn't sleep?"

Mikasa's eyes were on her hands in her lap but she nodded in response.

"Yeah, I miss him too." Armin hated seeing Mikasa so upset. He never thought it was fair to have the one thing she wanted ripped from her all the time. Sure Armin loved Eren too, he was his best friend, his brother but Mikasa loved him on a different level; the type of love that brought her more pain than happiness but when it brought her happiness, anyone could see it. He wished he could see it now, he missed seeing her smile.

Mikasa nodded again. Armin noticed a few tears falling in her lap as she did.

"He'll be okay." He placed a hand on her back. "Levi's with them. You know he won't let anything happen to Eren, or Historia. Even if it's just not to face you afterwards."

She let out a chocked laugh causing Armin to feel a smile on his lips.

"He did all this for a reason, and that reason is not to just hand over two of our comrades."

"Why couldn't he have let me go though? I could've handled his plan just fine."

"No, you're right, I'm sure you could've but you…" He poked a finger towards her chest. "Are too emotionally invested. Eren is your priority, not the plan and there needed to be a balance of the both so Levi went."

"Doesn't make me feel any better," she said softly, her eyes looking up at him.

"And nothing probably will."

With a small sigh, Mikasa placed her head on Armin's shoulder. He moved his arm around her, holding her against him.

"I just got him back, Armin. Not just Eren but my Eren."

"He's always been your Eren, from the moment he met you. You two just never talk about anything, you just hold everything inside because the both of you are too scared so you think Eren doesn't want you around and Eren thinks you only want to be around because you feel indebted to him. It keeps escalating till you two are angry and hurt with each other. Sound about right?"

Mikasa didn't respond.

"That's okay. I've been around the two of you long enough to know that's right." He nudged her with his shoulder. "And I'm assuming something happened when we went to rescue him that relieved that horrible tension between you guys. You don't have to tell me, I can already assume it was you who said something but not everything." Armin looked down at Mikasa. She was never too much of a talkative though he could only imagine what she would've said when she thought she was spending her last moments with Eren. "You tried to kiss him didn't you?"

"Armin," Mikasa mumbled, elbowing him in the rib.

He saw that blush spreading through her face. He couldn't resist a chuckle. "Whatever it was you got through to him. Everyone can see a difference in him now. I think they can see him look at you like I've always seen him look at you."

Mikasa didn't say anything again and that was okay.

It was funny, he could remember being friends with Eren before Mikasa came into Eren's life, but at the same time it always felt like it was the three of them for their whole lives and a lot of the time, just him and Mikasa together trying to help and support Eren. Armin knew Eren was blinded to a lot of what on around his ambitions, but Armin had a feeling Eren's eyes were getting opened a lot more lately. And if there was anything Armin wanted, it was to see his two friends happy and not live with regret their whole lives. It would be unbearable for him to watch.

"Are you ever gonna tell him?"

She lifted her head off his shoulder to meet his eyes. She wasn't angry at the question, no, instead her eyes were filled with a sadness; one Armin saw in her many times before. "Tell him what? We don't have time for any of that. Even if he did feel the same…we're fighting and getting close to something beyond all of us. There's no time for love."

"You're wrong, Mikasa. Love is all we have left. It's what drives us all. It's what drives you, isn't it? It's what you live for."

"And see what it gets me?" She sighed, her eyes looking over to the flame in the lantern. "Just a broken heart and sleepless nights."

"Sometimes, yes," Armin said. "But it also makes you happy when the world is so dark and dreary. Don't try to deny it, because I see you when you don't think anyone can see you." He nudged her gently, watching a smile pull at her lips. That's more like it.

"Could you…" He met her gaze once more. "Could you live with yourself if something happened to Eren, and you never told him how you felt? That he would die without knowing someone loved him more than anything else in the world?" Armin didn't want to be harsh with her, and he prayed to every higher power there might be it would never happen, not to Eren, not to her but he did want her to understand the type of pain she was setting herself up for. In this world, in their lives, surviving was not guaranteed. Armin couldn't sit by and just let the possibility of regret tear her apart.

"Because I know Eren wouldn't want that. He'd want to know and I think he'd want you to know too, but he's a little harder to get through to than you. I wouldn't want him to live with the feeling of never telling the person he cares about most how he feels, and the same for you. You've had enough hurt in your life."

"So have you," Mikasa said, surprising Armin slightly; he hadn't really been expecting the conversation to turn on him. "I'm sorry, about the mission. I hated having to sit by and watch it happen."

"It was my plan, I knew the stakes. There's nothing for you to feel sorry about."

"But I do. I don't like to see you hurt either." She rested her head back against his shoulder, her eyes looking up at the dark ceiling.

Armin placed his head on top of hers. It was like they were kids again, waiting for Eren to come home after he took off after some bullies demanding that Mikasa and Armin not follow under any circumstances. He'd limp home, clearly on the losing side of the battle, at least on the days Mikasa listened to him and didn't follow and they'd be there to make him feel better.

Nothing changed all too much except now it seemed like Eren went away more often from them and when he came back, it was with wounds much too deep for a bandage to heal.

"Is there something you two want to tell me?"

Armin jumped the same time he felt Mikasa do the same at the sound of the voice and Eren standing the doorway. His arms were across his chest, but Armin could see the faintest trace of a smile on his lips.

"I figured you'd approve more of me than Jean," Armin said, letting go of Mikasa so she could stand up if she wanted to.

Eren snorted. "Well, you do have better hair than him." He walked over to take a seat with them but Mikasa met him first. She didn't even have to say anything to him. He must have seen the look in her eyes before he placed his hands on her shoulders. "I'm fine. Nothing happened, nothing went wrong. I promise."

Mikasa nodded, her shoulders relaxing under his touch. There it was, Armin saw the tension leaving Eren's body just at Mikasa's presence. It always was that way. She had a calming effect on him; which greatly helped Eren whose hot headed personality got him in trouble all the time.

"You look exhausted," Eren muttered slightly, his hands still on her. "It's late. God knows Levi's gonna wake us up at the crack of dawn to tell everyone the plan for tomorrow."

"Where're Levi and Historia?" Armin asked, pushing himself up to his feet.

"Levi went to wake up Hanji, and Historia probably went to sleep somewhere. Which sounds like a good idea if you ask me." He gently turned Mikasa around so her back was towards him before leading her towards the room where everyone was still sound asleep. Armin followed, carrying his lantern with him. Sure enough, Hanji was gone, but Historia had joined the room. Eren flopped down on his blankets, Mikasa doing the same near him. Armin put the lantern down just to tug his blankets out from underneath Jean. Armin laid down, about to blow out the flame when he saw his friends nearby.

Eren was saying something in low tones to Mikasa, her body facing him and one of his hands still on her shoulder. She said something back but Armin couldn't make out what it was. They were a little bit a part, each on their own bed but Armin knew how long that was gonna last; about as long as it took him to blow out the flame, which he did. He settled down in the darkness, still hearing a little shifting from the two of them nearby.

Armin knew Mikasa probably wouldn't take his advice, not yet at least. Those two caused each other so much unneeded pain and heartache, and yet, they still brought each other more happiness than Armin thought was left in the world and that was good enough for him.