Pairing: Eren/Mikasa
Setting: Somewhere in the current arc
Words: 6064
Rating: T+ (I really only rate smut M but this has pretty strong language)
Notes: A request very different from my normal ones. This was from ButterflyBlueEyes who wanted a story about Eren thinking Mikasa was dead and realizing his feelings for her. I'm sorry if it's too much, drama isn't want I write most ofte but it gets pretty fluffy too so don't worry! Of course the title is from "Let Her Go" by Passenger. If you check out the tumblr post for this one you can see the gorgeous fanart the ever wonderful and talented Rose (Daydream24-7) drew for this story!
You Only Know You Love Her When You Let Her Go
"I wonder what's taking them so long?" Eren looked up from his seat at the table to one of the outside windows. They should have been back hours ago.
"Something might've went wrong."
He glanced over to Historia sitting across from him and picking at the candle wax from the lantern on the table. "That's not exactly what I want to hear."
"But that doesn't mean it's not the truth." She shrugged seeming unconcerned.
Eren's fingers tapped at the table, his leg fidgeting underneath him. He hated being stuck inside all the time, never going out and helping his team. He understood why, yeah, but that didn't mean he liked being cooped up in one place or another. At least they were out of that cave and back where he could see sunlight. Granted it was a house tucked away in the woods again, but this time much closer to where they had to be for their next move.
Footsteps up the wooden porch perked up Eren's ears; finally they were back. It was just a routine supply run, Historia was just being a downer. Hanji seemed to hear them too as she poked her head in from the other room where she had been working.
"Jaeger, come with me." Levi was barely in the house and into the room when he motioned for Eren to get up. His tone was strange.
Eren stood up to his feet but what was going on? Armin was in next; maybe he…something was wrong. Armin wouldn't even meet his eyes; none of them would as they walked down the stairs, no one except Sasha who…was crying.
"Wha-"
"Now."
Levi turned to leave the room and Eren scurried to catch up. He followed Levi past the kitchen and into a small room where he knew Levi had meetings. Something happened and it wasn't good. The door slammed shut behind them leaving them alone with a few chairs and a table.
Levi leaned in to light the candle on the table. "Sit down."
"Sir, please just tell me what the hell is goi-"
"Sit down."
Eren grunted as he sat his body down in the chair, his arms crossing over his chest. He looked up at Levi expecting to get yelled at but his commanding officer just looked tired. "Sir?"
Levi looked up to meet his eyes. "We got ambushed. A deviant and a few 10 meter class came out of nowhere. We were completely caught off guard but we managed to take them down quickly." He paused for a moment. "The last I saw of Mikasa she got knocked out of the air by one's hand. It didn't look like it grabbed at her, but we couldn't find her or her body after they were taken care of. As of right now Mikasa is missing."
Eren watched Levi, listening to his words but none of it seemed to make any sense. Mikasa was the best fighter he knew aside from Levi. She could handle a few titans on her own, let alone with others. "So where is she? If you didn't see her get…" He swallowed the bile that rose in his throat. "Eaten then she has to be there.
Levi gently put his hands on the table, his body leaning against it. "I have no idea where she would've gone to. We looked until the sun went down. There was nothing we could do in the dark."
"So you left her?" Eren barely felt himself stand up, the chair scraping against the wooden floor. "She could be hurt. She could be bleeding out somewhere and you just left her?"
"We looked all around the area for her. We waited for the bodies to evaporate to see if one fell near her. There was no sign-"
"Bullshit there's always a sign!" his voice was rising he knew, but it was out of his control. His fists were clenched against his side, his eyes narrowed. He couldn't even remember the last time he felt this much anger surge through him. Mikasa never gave up on him and he was not gonna let those bastards just give up on her. "We need to go back out there and find her. Right now."
"And do what? Call her name into the night? Its fucking pitch black out there. We'll go back out in the morning and look again."
Eren shook his head, his teeth grinding together. "She could be dead by then!"
"We were attacked by titans. Eren, you need to come to terms with the fact that she could already be dead."
He felt his heart sink into his stomach, his head still shaking back and forth. Silence settled over the room as Levi watched him. "Don't you fucking say that." Hot tears stung his eyes. "Don't you dare. Not Mikasa. I'll go after her myself."
"Yeah, and get yourself killed, that will help this entire situation. We'll go in the morning."
Eren knew Levi's word was law. That's the way it was and Eren felt like he was six years old being scolded by his father but he wasn't six any more and this wasn't over a broken toy. This was Mikasa. And she was hurt out there. Eren gritted his teeth and turned away from Levi. Eren didn't care if Levi had anything else to say, Eren didn't want to hear it. He swung open the door and went back into the living room without a glance.
Almost everyone was staring at him; he had no doubt his shouting drifted right into this room. Historia was still sitting where she had been, with Connie and Sasha joining her. Hanji placed her hand on Eren's shoulder before walking past him probably to go where Levi was. Jean was sitting on the couch, his head in his hands.
"Eren?" Armin's soft voice caught his attention.
He looked over at his friend who was taking a few steps towards him. Armin was cautious, but Eren saw the sadness in his eyes. Eren knew he should be the good friend, he should comfort Armin too. This couldn't be easy on him either but Eren couldn't even comfort himself let alone someone else. He shook his head and walked to the stairs, not looking back until he got to his room. He shut the door behind him and sank to the floor.
Not Mikasa.
Not her.
Not when he wasn't even there to help her, to save her, to protect her and now something happened to her.
For the first time since he was nine years old, Mikasa wasn't with him, and he had no idea when she was coming back. The thought chilled him to his very core. He pushed himself off the floor and moved to his bed, not even bothering to get changed. The faster this night was over, the faster he could find Mikasa just bring her back; know she was safe again. She'd be safe. She couldn't be gone. She was always there. He promised they'd always be together. She wasn't gone.
Eren was surprised when he walked down the stairs just before sunrise to see Levi already standing at the window. Eren thought he'd be the first one up, after the hellish night of practically zero sleep he got.
"Go grab some gear, Jaeger. I sent Hanji to wake up the others." Levi glanced over at Eren before looking back out the window. Levi didn't look much better.
Without a word, Eren started to pull out their gear from the nearby storage closet. It seemed like ages since he wore these things, having to be kept inside and under watch all the damn time. Though Eren was pretty sure if it was anyone other than Mikasa, he'd still be stuck inside.
He started to strap himself into the gear, pushing his cloak out of the way so he could twist his body around and make sure everything was secure. He refused to come back without Mikasa, or at least some sort of clue about her whereabouts. There had to be something; something other than his dreams in where no matter how hard he searched, he only ever found her body.
Eren felt a hand on his shoulder and turned his head to see Armin standing behind him; Eren hadn't even noticed the others come down the stairs; they were all here now, save for Historia. No one really said anything, just the noises of gear being moved around and getting hooked up.
"Hey, Eren?"
He looked up to Armin, who was watching him still. Armin had a smile on his face, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Remember that time when we were kids and we were at the market alone?"
Levi opened the door, motioning for them to all head out.
Eren shrugged at Armin's question as he started to walk out into the still slightly bitter morning. "We did that a lot."
"Yeah, but this was the time we lost Mikasa and we thought your mom was gonna kill us if we didn't find her."
Ah yeah, he remembered that. It seemed kind of like a dream at this point in their lives, but he remembered being under the hot sun, shouting her name. "Yeah." Eren pulled his cloak tighter around him as they followed Levi off the porch and into the nearby woods that lead to the closest town. "And we found her sitting at a table with some sweets someone gave her waiting for us to show up so she could share them."
Armin chuckled. "Mikasa is smart, and resourceful. I'm sure she's just gonna yell at us when we find her for making her sit out here all night."
Eren would take her yelling at him all day if it meant she was okay. It had only been one night; one night and he never knew how much he could miss her voice, her face, her very presence just in the same house as him. Since they joined the military, Eren had trouble sleeping without her in the same room as him, let alone not knowing where she was, if she was safe. It was unbearable.
There was a clearing nearby but one clearly made by a fight; there were trees down everywhere and it still smelt like dissolving titan flesh. This was where it happened.
"Spread out but stay together in small groups," Levi called to them. "We have plenty of sunlight but who knows how far around the area we'll have to look. Try not to call her name too loudly in case there're people around come to see what happened yesterday. Report anything immediately."
The others started to wander around the area. Connie was calling out Mikasa's name as quietly as he could; it was the only other sound aside from footsteps on the forest floor. Armin followed behind Eren as he walked outside the clearing. No use looking in the areas they already did last night. She would've moved far out of the way if she couldn't fight the titans that were here. He walked slowly, looking everywhere his eyes could see, any little thing that would help.
So far it just looked like a forest to him.
Eren kept walking out, farther away from the clear evidence of titans. He knew Armin was still with him, looking on the other side but the others were off in the distance. She had to be here somewhere. She was probably hurt and couldn't walk. Maybe she was even knocked out somewhere. She needed to get help, not be sitting out in the woods alone.
Something caught his eye. Something that was very out of place in a forest. He practically ran to the tree. There was no denying it. Eren reached down to pick up the red scarf he knew so well. He ran his fingers over the material as it lay draped in his hands. His heart fluttered in his chest. There was no way she'd just leave this here. She had to be here.
"Mikas-" Eren didn't even get the chance to finish her name. She wasn't sitting round the other side of the tree like he assumed. No, but blood was, all over the trunk and the ground.
"No…" Armin was near him again but Eren couldn't see him. He couldn't see anyone.
The ground started spinning, and his head started to throb. He thought he heard someone call his name, but it was far away. He reached up to press a hand to his head but before he could make sense of anything he felt his knees hit the forest ground. Hands steadied him but Eren had no idea whose hands they were. His hands he could see. They were covered in red. Not blood like he saw, the material was too soft in his hands and warm. He brought it up to his face. He could still feel the overwhelming sense of comfort when the scarf still smelt like her, but it was quickly replaced by a sharp pain in his chest.
Voices sounded around him, but he didn't lift his head, he didn't bother moving.
"Braus, see if you can find a trail. She was here so I want to know if she moved. Now."
"Eren?"
That voice was closer. Armin. His hand was on Eren's head. He looked up to see Armin kneeling in front of him, but he was blurry, the whole world around Eren was. It took him a moment to realize he was crying.
"Arlert, take him back. We'll keep looking." Levi must've been nearby too.
"Sir." Armin hesitated. "He's just gonna drive himself crazy pent up back there. At least here he'll know-"
"With that much blood loss there is nothing here that he'll want to see. Take him back."
Eren felt two hands grab onto his shoulders and pull him up to his feet. Judging by the way Armin was still sitting in front of him, he took it to be Levi.
"I want to stay," Eren muttered, reaching his arm up to wipe his face on his sleeve. "I need to-"
"The last thing we need is you having a meltdown and getting unstable. We're in hiding. I'd like to keep it that way." Levi paused for a moment as Eren dropped his hand again, Mikasa's scarf still tight in his hands. "I doubt she let that thing go without reason. She was probably leaving us a sign. If she's out here. We'll find her, though I'm not gonna fucking sugarcoat it for you. Now get out of here."
Eren felt hands on him again, this time much warmer than the Lance Corporal's hard grip.
"C'mon, Eren." It was Armin. He gently tugged at him till Eren started to walk back the direction they came. The voices of the others started to fade away from his ears.
The sun was higher than when they left the house, the bright rays hitting Eren's eyes through the trees. "Do you think they'll find her?" His voice was a lot quieter than he expected.
"I think, hope is the only thing we have left." Eren felt Armin's hand clasp onto his shoulder.
Hope.
It seemed so worthless at this point. They saw so many people, so many people they loved killed in front of their eyes. What made this any different? Why did he refuse to let this one go?
Eren knew of course. It wasn't just anyone they were talking about. It was Mikasa, who had been right by his side every day since they were nine years old. Who was there for him in every situation. Who saved his life at risk of her own more than once and without her, all it left was a hole. It was like a piece of him had suddenly been ripped away leaving him aching. He needed to see those eyes of hers again, that small smile, to see the scarf around her neck again for him to feel whole again.
He wondered when it happened; when she wrapped herself so much around him that living without her was painful. He never even saw it happen. He never felt it happen. Not until she wasn't there.
"Eren..?"
The house was in sight now, just out of the forest.
He reached up and wiped away the tears he could feel rolling down his cheeks. "Yeah. I'm fine." He wasn't even convinced himself, let alone enough to convince Armin, but his friend didn't say anything else, he just headed up the porch stairs to get the door.
No one was in the living room when they stepped in. It was still early. Historia and Hanji were probably doing morning chores Levi left for them. The door shut behind them and Hanji's head popped out of the kitchen. She had a towel over her shoulder and a wide smile, clearly expecting good news if they were back so early. Neither of them had to say a word, Hanji's eyes saw the scarf still in Eren's hands, and the smile dropped from her face.
"Where are the others?" she asked, obviously not wanting to ask the other question.
"Still looking," Armin answered. "They found a trail so I'm sure they'll be back when they find something."
Clearly not the answer anyone wanted to hear but Hanji nodded and disappeared back into the other room.
Eren worked on getting his useless gear off before dropping down on the couch, Mikasa's scarf falling onto his lap. It was funny. It was his scarf once, but not since that night. He passed it over to her just to keep her warm when she was cold, and she never took it off again. He never thought of it as his again, it was always hers.
"I should've been there," Eren murmured. He looked up from his lap to see Armin take a seat in a chair nearby.
"Don't do that to yourself. You weren't there and it's not your fault." Armin didn't look over at him, but his voice was firm.
"She was always there for me, and the one time she needs me I'm not even there to help her. And now she's…" Eren's voice broke, his eyes falling back to his lap, his fingers grasping onto the red scarf.
"Eren." He felt Armin's gaze on him. "You did more for her in her lifetime than anyone. You're not to blame here. If you want to blame someone, blame the person who was there, who saw her fall, and still couldn't get to her in time."
"How could you blame yourself for that?" Eren looked up at his old friend. "You were trying to save everyone from titans. There's no way you could see everything that was going on."
Armin gave him a wry smile. "And how could you blame yourself for not being there?"
Eren decided it was probably better not to respond to that but it couldn't change the aching guilt in the pit of his stomach. They all joined knowing they could die at any second, but now that he was faced with the reality of living without Mikasa? What was it even worth?
"I tried," Armin said. "I saw her go down from the air and I ran to find her on the ground, to help her get back up before a titan found her but she was gone. Not on the ground, not in the air and I searched for her while everyone was fighting because…because…" His eyes were on his hands. "How could I come back and tell you she was gone?"
"You had no idea," Eren said. "This is Mikasa we are talking about. How could any of us known? She's always been able to take care of herself."
Armin let out a choked laugh. "No, Eren, she's always been able to take care of you, not herself."
Eren opened his mouth to ask what the hell he was talking about, but Armin's eyes met his.
"She lived her whole life for you. Everything she did was for you to be safe. I never knew how you couldn't see it and...and I probably shouldn't be the person to tell you this but at this point I don't know if there's anyone else left to. She joined the military for you, to be with you and it was never to repay a debt like you always thought, though I think you at least know that by now. Eren, she loves you. She always has. I've known it for years, and I think it's time you do too."
Eren felt his stomach lurch, his heart in his throat. The room started to spin again as he closed his eyes, his head falling in his hands. Jesus Christ. How could he be so stupid. Of course, she did. It was so clear now looking back. Oh God. All that time and the way he treated her. She should hate him; he deserved that at least. Not the...the love of someone as amazing as her. He never…he never told her enough, let her know how much she meant to him. All these years, it was always her. From the moment he met her, it was her.
The door swung open causing Eren to fumble to his feet. Desperation filled his very soul as he watched the faces of his squad walk in. The one face he wanted to see more than anyone in the world was still not there.
"I'm sorry, Eren," Sasha spoke up from the front of the group. Her fingers were fidgeting with each other. "We found a trail, but it stopped suddenly and then we heard people and we had to leave."
Eren looked over to Levi, who was taking off his gear. "So you left her again?"
"Jaeger, I am really not in the mood for your shit right now." He didn't even turn around. "If the titans didn't get to her, than she probably died in the forest trying to get out. The situation leaves little room for anything else."
"How can you even say that," he said through gritted teeth, trying to fight back the stupid tears he knew threatened to fall once more.
Levi turned around, his eyes fierce. "Because it's the truth. Now stop being a child and just expect it. Do you think any of us enjoy loosing people? No, but it fucking happens. So you need to learn to get over it so we can move on with our mission."
Eren wanted to hit him. To just throw himself into a fight he knew he could never win. He glanced over at Armin, whose face was staring at the ground, his eyes glossy. Eren turned away from them, still holding her scarf, and walked until he reached his room, slamming the door behind him. He felt like he was a child again, throwing himself down face first onto his bed but it didn't matter. Nothing mattered.
His hands brought the soft material of her scarf up to his face. It still smelt like her. He knew that smell would fade over time, and the thought only made him feel like he got punched in the gut. His chest constricted and heaved. He tried to breathe in to control his breath but it only got choked up in his throat. A heavy sob racked his body. He tried to bite back his tears but it wasn't happening.
He remembered how it felt to lose his mom whom he loved and he remembered how it felt to lose Petra and the others who trusted him but this…this was different.
Another sob and soon they wouldn't stop. He held his hands over his face, trying to hide his cries into the fabric, tears pouring down his face.
This was a gaping hole in his chest. This was his life losing its drive. This was losing the person he was in love with and this was living with never having told her that.
Eren wasn't sure how long had had laid in bed, or when he fell asleep but when his eyes cracked open, the sun had been long set. His eyes stung at the air suddenly hitting him, causing him to reach up and rub them as he sat up. His head was throbbing but the last thing he wanted to do was sit in bed. He went to stand up but something fell off his lap as he did. Eren reached down to pick up the scarf he had with him since he found it. He carefully wrapped it around his neck, just like how Mikasa did it. It was a sharp jab to the chest more than anything, but he'd keep it safe for her.
He opened his door and headed down the empty hallway. It was dark, like he expected. Everyone must be in bed already but as he approached the staircase, there was one flickering candle on the table in the living room. Levi was sitting there, his eyes on papers in front of him. Eren almost turned and went back to his room, but he didn't want to. If anyone understood, it would be Levi.
Eren quietly walked down the stairs and made his way to the other side of the table. Levi glanced up at him but didn't say a word. He just looked back down at what he was reading. Taking that as a sign Levi didn't want to beat the shit out of him, he pulled a chair out to sit at the other end of the table.
"It looked better on her," Levi said, flipping a page over.
Eren snorted in response, but it was probably true. "Sir? I'm-"
"If you are going to apologize to me about earlier, don't bother. " He put his papers down, meeting Eren's eyes across the table. "It's not like anyone in this place hasn't lost someone but that doesn't mean you let it blind you. We don't get the luxury of funerals and mourning. You know that. It's shitty but its life."
Eren nodded, his fingers pulling on the wood of the table. "It's just, it was Mikasa. Of all people, I could count on her to always be there."
"She had the tolerance of a saint to put up with your dumbass."
A smile pulled at his lips. "Yeah, she really did. I didn't deserve any of it."
Levi propped his chin up on his hands. "I think she'd beg to differ."
Eren felt an ache in his chest, his small smile falling. What was his life going to become? Did it even matter if they saw the outside world if she wasn't there with them? Did anything even matter anymore.
"It's not easy to lose the person you're in love with. She knew that, which why she put me through hell to save your ass all the time but giving up isn't an option either."
Eren's head snapped up to look at Levi again.
"Don't think I don't know you, brat. If you even think about going back on what you want, she'll find a way back to this place and kick your sorry ass for you." He looked back down at his papers. "She was a good solider, Jaeger, and good person. Be thankful you got so much time with her."
His fingers tugged on the ends of the worn scarf. He did have a lot of time with her, good and bad but almost ten years worth. Even knowing this was how it all ended, he didn't regret saving her that day. She made his life better, she always had.
Eren pushed himself away from the table and went to stand up; maybe someone left him some food in the kitchen. Armin might have. He slowly walked across the room when something caught his attention. Some kind of noise outside the door. Levi stood to his feet, clearly having heard it too. He made a motion to Eren to stay where he was as Levi slowly walked to the door. In a swift motion, he swung open the door, expecting a person to be standing there, but instead a person fell in through the doorway.
Eren stared down at the body, the slim body, the black hair, the bandaged wrist poking out from under a torn white shirt. He felt his stomach lurched up to his throat. It took him a moment before he dove down at the ground. His heart was pounding in his chest as he reached down to pull her up into his arms. Her body was so light as she rolled into his lap, her head falling backwards. His breath caught in his throat when he saw the face he never thought he would again. His hand reached out to hold Mikasa's head up and he leaned down to press his ear to her chest.
"She's breathing." Eren could barely control his shaking hands as he held her close to him. He brushed some of the hair out of her face. Mikasa was tough, the toughest person he knew. He shouldn't have been surprised really, but all he could feel was overwhelming relief.
Her eyes fluttered open, those dark eyes he knew so well. God he wished he could stop crying for two damn seconds today but for the first time in the past two days, it was because she was safe.
"Eren…" her voice was soft, barely there but he could hear her. Her voice alone brought a smile to his face.
"Hey," he ran his thumb over her cheek. "Don't talk okay, we're gonna get you help."
"She's lost a lot of blood." Eren hadn't even noticed Levi couched down next to her looking over her wounds with the candle. "Pick her up and follow me."
Eren didn't need to be told twice. He carefully put his other arm under her legs and pulled her up with him. She made a few noises as her body fell into his but Eren kept her close to him.
Levi led them up the stairs and down the hall before pounding on Hanji's door. "Open up, shitty glasses."
There were some scuffling noises, before the door opened. Hanji peered out looking confused at first but as she looked from Levi to Eren with a gasp and back to Levi. "Is that…?"
"Yeah are you just gonna make him stand there holding her or let us in to see what's wrong?"
Hanji stepped aside as she rolled up her sleeves ushering them. Eren followed Levi in the room and laid Mikasa down on Hanji's bed. Under the candlelight, Eren could see the dried blood all over her clothes, the cuts underneath, the deeps wounds on her legs, her stomach.
Mikasa was still conscious her eyes calm as Levi ripped at her shirt and pants to be able to see all the damage. She wasn't looking at them though, she was looking at Eren.
Hanji let out a low whistle. "You got yourself real beat on, and then infected probably from the time you were crawling around outside. Let me go get some supplies from down stairs." She was gone without another word.
"Jaeger, I'd tell you to get the hell out of here, but something tells me you're not gonna budge." Levi wasn't looking at him, still carefully feeling over Mikasa, checking for broken bones Eren assumed. "You have a chance most people would kill for so don't get in the way."
"Yes, Sir." Eren didn't look over at him, his eyes were still on Mikasa. He kneeled down by the side of the bed and reached over to grab her hand that was laying out. Her skin was rough against his, but that was okay. She was okay. She'd be okay.
"Okay." Hanji walked back in, her arms filled with bandages, swabs, medicine, anything they had hoarded. "Eren, go get some water and a rag. Things probably aren't gonna be so pleasant for her, so just keep her cool with the water got it?"
"Yeah, got it." Eren stood up to run downstairs, but he felt a tug on his hand. Mikasa's eyes were on him, her hand still holding onto his. "Hey," he said, putting his other hand over hers. "It's gonna be okay. I promise."
That seemed to help; she let her hand drop from his, her eyes looking down to what Hanji and Levi were doing.
She came back from the dead. She came back to them. There was no way they were letting her go again.
It wasn't the sunlight shining through the window that woke him up, nor was it the aching in his knees from kneeling for so long, or his back hurting from being hunched over, no, it was a soft touch brushing through his hair. Eren lifted his head off his arms on the bed, his eyes squinting through the brightness of the room. He was still in Hanji's room, still leaning over the bed, which meant…
His eyes snapped over to the bed. Mikasa was watching him, looking a bit more lively than last night but still laying down.
"Hey, how're you feeling?" Eren tried not to yawn as he rubbed his eyes. It was a long night; trying to clean all her wounds, bind broken bones, and keep her stable through the whole thing.
"Better," she said.
"Good." Eren couldn't hold off a smile. She really was going to be okay. Everything was right again. He felt whole again.
"Get up…off the floor," she breathed, slowly moving her body over on the bed. "You've…been there all…night."
Eren stretched his arms over his head. "I don't think so. You're still hurt. I'm not-" One look from her was enough though. With a shake of his head, Eren carefully laid down on his side on the bed. Okay, that was much better than the floor and he could feel Mikasa's warm body near him, though he was careful not to not touch her.
"I think Hanji got a better bed than all of us," Eren sighed, his head rolling on her pillow as he looked over at her.
Mikasa chuckled softly as she reached her hand over to the scarf around his neck. "You found it."
"Of course I did. I wasn't just gonna leave it there." Doing his best not to hit her, Eren pulled the scarf off his neck and draped it back over her. "It really does look better on you." His hand drifted over her face. He was about to pull away but the way she leaned into his touch made his hand stay.
"I thought I was never gonna see you again," he murmured. "I thought I lost you."
Mikasa closed her eyes, a smile on her lips as she shook her head. "Never." Her eyes met his once more. "I came back…for you. I couldn't…I couldn't…"
"It's okay. You came back." Eren tried his best to be soothing but he wasn't the best person for the job. He placed his hands on her face, cradling her the best he could.
She took a shake breath, the beating to her ribs clearly was effecting her. "I couldn't…bear being away…from you."
"I know the feeling." Eren was aware of how close he was to her on the small bed, the way he felt her breath against his face, his lips. He wasn't even sure what he was doing, but when he felt his lips press up against hers it didn't matter anymore. He was gentle as her lips moved against his, one of her hands reaching up to his arm. Chills went down his spine, his heartbeat pounded in his ears. God, he was never letting her out of his sight again.
He broke away, not wanting her to get out of breath and hurt herself. He placed his forehead against hers. "If Levi thought you gave him hell when he tried to separate us, he has no idea what's coming for him from me." He paused before taking a deep breath. "Mikasa, I-"
Mikasa chuckled, her eyes closing again. "I know, Eren…I know."
Eren nodded, his head resting against hers on the pillow as his eyes fluttered shut.
He was never going to let her forget it.