It was weird, surreal even for Alice to come back to the beach camp and to see all the familiar faces after spending so much time away. After being kidnapped by the others, separated from Jack, kept in a cage and finally, being able to leave, but then forced to stay again.

The survivors welcomed them back with open arms and Alice actually felt her good mood coming back. Ever since Jack had seen the sub being destroyed, he'd lost his hope, feeling both devastated and furious and it kind of affected her, too. Now she could finally breath. She felt like she was home. Currently, there was nothing to run to or from. She was among the people she'd grown to love and treat nearly as her own family. It didn't please her to learn that the hatch had blown up… or imploded… she didn't quite understand that phenomena, but what mattered was that it was just gone. No more showers. No more… Alice only sighed and decided to push those thoughts away. She should be happy that she, Jack and… She stopped again. She was happy that they were all, all right. And maybe it wasn't fair that she'd yelled at Sawyer instead of thanking him. No one else was determined and brave enough to actually march into the jungle straight into the enemy's camp just to rescue her. Maybe the gesture, the intention was what should really matter. Besides, Sawyer didn't blow up the boat. Locke did.

With all of that in her mind, Alice started looking for the blond guy. She'd sworn once that she would never forgive him, that she would never trust him again or try to rekindle their friendship, but something told her that she really should. Sawyer risked everything when going after her and trying to save Jack for her as well! He clearly wasn't the same man who'd tricked them all into giving him all the guns and medicine. He seemed to have truly changed now and even Kate admitted that.

Eventually, Alice spotted his lonely figure on the shore. He looked so down and so defeated that her heart went out to him. She needed to go over there and talk to him right away. She glanced back at Jack, but he was too busy catching up with the rest to notice her, so she just made her way to James.

Once she reached him, she suddenly found herself speechless, so she just joined him, sitting right by his side and mimicking his pose when supporting her arms on her bent knees. She was desperately looking for the right thing to say and then he spoke first, "I came for you because I wanted to make it right. I screwed up so many times I lost count. I never did right by you and you were the only real friend I've ever had. There, said it."

Alice was actually surprised to hear all of that. She never expected such honesty, but then again, she'd met with it once before. It was when Sawyer revealed to her his big secret. Maybe she should actually give him the benefit of the doubt. She'd never expected him to care enough to risk his own life and come for her and he'd done just that.

"I'm sorry I acted the way I did," she finally apologized, but didn't have the courage to look him in the eye just yet. Instead, she focused on the ocean in front of them. "I just didn't see it before it was too late," she added and hoped he understood her. She was mad at him for coming for her, but now once she actually thought how he must've felt, she understood that he'd really risked it all for her.

"I care about you. I care more than you know and…" he hesitated before he continued, "it really hurt when you turned your back on me."

Alice just nodded. "All right. We can start over. I guess I should thank you for thinking about me. For trying to save me and Jack."

"Yeah, I knew it'd be for nothing if I only saved you," Sawyer joked and Alice laughed a little. "I'm sorry that the sub exploded," he then added in a more serious tone. "If only I knew you were going off the island…"

"But you didn't and you didn't blow it up yourself either. Locke did. So I do not blame you," Alice emphasized and finally, she met his blue eyes. "I forgive you for everything, but I will not do it again."

"Understood." He nodded. "So… you wanna hug it out or something? And just so you know, I still thank God that I didn't get to your and doc's place a few minutes later…" he added, obviously joking again and it did exactly what he intended – Alice laughed again.

"Stop that!" she scolded him and playfully bumped his knee with hers. "But you can hug me if you want."

Sawyer laughed merrily and then his arms were around her and he pretended to try to struggle her as his hold on her tightened significantly and she squealed joyfully, hugging him back. Jack was watching them in that moment with a strange expression on his face.

Alice was actually surprised the next day when she woke up and didn't feel any nausea or strange feelings in the depths of her stomach. It seemed wrong somehow, as though she should suffer, still. Wasn't that what pregnant women were usually going through? Why would things be any different in her case?

It felt good to wake up by Jack's side – even if this time it was in a tent and not a bed – but physically she seemed to hurt all over. It was amazing, really, how fast one could get used to a comfy bed and how hard it was to get used to sleeping on the ground again. Alice would love to stay and wait till Jack opened his eyes, maybe score some kisses, but she felt like she really needed to stretch her legs and just… everything, she decided, frustrated with her physical state. She also needed to figure out if she was really pregnant. She just had to know. And when she knew, she would have to talk to Jack. She felt awful when hiding such a big thing from him and felt the need to just be honest.

Once she emerged from her tent and stretched out all her muscles, she figured that she would be too lucky if Sawyer turned out to have another pregnancy test as he'd already given one to Sun. She needed an alternative way to find out if she was carrying a child. Going over to him and asking for what she needed didn't appeal to her at all this time anyway. She knew she wouldn't hear the end of it.

She spotted Juliet just sitting on the shore and eating her breakfast alone and she felt sorry for the woman since no one seemed to like her. At first Jack and Alice had wondered whether they should really trust her, too, but now they had that surety. They knew something the others didn't and it was better for everyone for things to just stay that way, at least for the time being.

"Good morning," Alice said when coming over to Juliet with a plate as well. She was going to eat her breakfast in the blonde's company.

"Good morning," Juliet answered, but she didn't reciprocate Alice's smile.

"They'll come around, you know," Alice tried to make the woman feel better and finally, a small smile appeared on her face.

"I'm used to being an outsider, to never belonging," Juliet confessed.

"I'm sorry. But I really hope things will change for you here. They're all good people. They're just very suspicious after everything that your people did to us."

"I never agreed with their ways," Juliet admitted, "but I didn't have a choice in the matter. My sister… she had cancer and was basically infertile. Thanks to me, her biggest dream came true. She has a baby now and is cancer free."

"Did Ben promise you all of that to keep you here?" Alice's interest was piqued.

"Yes and no. The pregnancy was thanks to my treatment. Ben promised to cure my sister from cancer when it seemed like both her and the baby would die."

"I am so, so sorry. But they're all right now, aren't they?"

"Yes, they are," Juliet answered with tears glistening in her eyes. "But I only saw them on camera. I wanted to go home. I want to go home so badly."

"We'll be free some day. I'm sure of it," Alice said and touched Juliet's hand to give her some support. Then she was surprised by her own words. We'll be free. Where did that even come from? "There's… there's something I need to ask you, Juliet," she finally decided to broach the subject. "I think… I think I may be pregnant and I would like to be sure. Could you maybe help me with that?"

What happened next, Alice just couldn't comprehend. Juliet visibly paled and then asked, clearly terrified, "Are you sure?"

"What?" Alice didn't understand the woman's reaction at all. "No, that's why I came to you. I would've asked Jack, but I don't really want to talk to him about it until I'm positive. It's a… let's just say it's a delicate matter with him."

Juliet didn't answer, she just kept on staring at the ocean.

"What's wrong?" Alice asked, panic rising inside of her as well, even though she didn't even know what she should be scared of.

"I came to this island to stop it," Juliet said.

"I still don't understand. To stop what exactly?" Alice prompted with a frown.

The blonde sighed and looked Alice straight in the eye. "Pregnant women on this island die," she said and Alice thought she stopped breathing there for a moment. "It happens at conception. That's why Claire is all right. That's why I was brought here. I managed to make my sister pregnant, so they thought I would be able to find a reason to their women dying. I never did. I developed a few serums, but they didn't work. A woman here is lucky if she survives till the middle of her second trimester."

Alice felt her throat going dry and her heart beating faster. She was scared now. Was she…? Did Juliet was just trying to tell her…?

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to be so blunt," Juliet quickly followed, but Alice seemed not to hear her.

"But… Sun is pregnant, too," she suddenly blurted out.

Juliet's focus only sharpened. "Take me to her, then," she asked Alice and their breakfast was suddenly abandoned. Alice lost her appetite for sure. She didn't know what to think or what to feel anymore. Was she really going to die? After everything she'd been through, was she just meant to die? She'd fought so hard to get her stability back, to conquer her own demons in order to live, to be with Jack, to survive. And now she found out she might've been so terribly wrong, after all.

"What are you going to do?" she asked Juliet when they were making their way to Sun's tent.

"First, we'll find out if you're really pregnant. Then we'll think what to do next," the blonde just answered.

For obvious reasons, Alice was the one who went to get Sun, though it was still hard to convince the Korean to come with her and Juliet, especially when Alice was simply impatient. She wanted to know if she was pregnant. She needed to finally be sure. She'd been feeling pretty weird those last few weeks and she deserved the answer.

On their way to the hatch Juliet claimed had a USG machine, Alice was just upset. She tried to imagine herself actually dying on the island. How would it happen? Would she bleed until there was no blood left in her veins? Would she get a seizure? Would she simply collapse? Would she be in so much pain that… She shook her head, forcing those images out of her mind. She couldn't be so negative about it all. Only then again, she'd slept with Jack way too many times and they'd been doing it pretty regularly. She would be surprised if she wasn't pregnant. She was probably carrying a baby inside of her and she wasn't sure she had enough strength to just tell Jack what would happen to her because of that. If he hadn't been ready to become a father before, now it would only get worse. He would never ever want to have kids and Alice didn't want that for him. She wanted him to have a family. Maybe the kind of a family she herself had once been a part of. She still remembered how much her parents loved each other, how much they cherished her and Annie. And then it all went to hell…

"We're here," Juliet informed, waking her up from her reverie.

Alice couldn't wait any longer so she asked if she could go first. Sun agreed, promising to stay on the other side of the exam room's door and suddenly, everything started happening too fast. Before Alice knew it, she was lying down and Juliet was exposing her stomach. The gel was smeared all over it and the machine was turned on and then Juliet was just looking at the monitor.

"Alice, you're not pregnant," she said a moment later.

There was silence, interrupted only by the hard beating of Alice's heart. At least it seemed to her that it was so loud. She seemed to be in shock as she'd been so sure she was pregnant.

"What?" she finally asked in a squeaky voice. "I don't… I don't understand… I was so sure…"

"Yes, but this is good news, isn't it?" Juliet asked, not really knowing how to react. "In these circumstances, it's the best news you can get."

"Well… yeah, but…" Alice stopped there for a moment. Jack wouldn't have to see her suffer and die. She wouldn't have to leave him. He wouldn't be broken because of it. They…

"You've been sleeping with Jack for a long time now, haven't you?" Juliet asked and Alice immediately felt uncomfortable. "It's all right. I'm just asking this as your doctor," the blonde quickly assured her.

"Yes," Alice answered her eventually. "I have been. So why am I not pregnant? Is there something wrong with me?"

"I don't have an answer for that, Alice. I'm sorry. We just don't have enough equipment here to conduct more tests."

"It's all right," Alice found herself saying and then she felt her body move and she was off the cot, just standing on the ground. She felt dizzy and shaky all over as though the news somehow upset her, but then she felt happy that she would live, provided what Juliet had told her about the pregnant women dying on the island was true. "I need a minute. I just… I'll bring Sun in," she said and was out of the room, then out of the hatch until she could breathe in the fresh and crisp air of the morning. It wasn't steamy and hot yet and she decided to just enjoy it and focus on the deep breathing.

When they came back to the camp, Alice realized that she might not be pregnant, but it didn't mean the threat was over. She had to change her whole lifestyle now, at least for as long as they were on the island and it might be indefinitely.

She tried to be discreet when she retreated to her and Jack's tent when making sure he was in their 'kitchen' on the beach. She thought he didn't notice her crying and disappearing there, but she was wrong. Not a minute passed by when somebody walked in and sat by her side.

"Alice, what's wrong?" she heard his gentle and caring voice with a hint a worry in it. She just cried harder and then his arms were around her and she couldn't help it, she craved him too much, she got used to being around him, to being with him that she naturally clang to his body.

"Tell me what's wrong, honey, please," he tried again when whispering into her ear and drawing circles with his fingers over her arm. "I love you and I want to help."

"I thought…" she finally started, but needed to stop for a second to catch her breath and calm herself down a bit. "I thought I was pregnant," she finally revealed and felt Jack's body tense immediately. Then he let go of her so he would be able to cup her face and look into her eyes.

"What?" he just asked.

"Don't worry. I'm not. Juliet confirmed it," Alice put his mind to rest right away.

"It's not what I…" he started and then just sighed, not finishing what he was going to say. "It doesn't matter now. What matters are your feelings, so tell me the rest. Did you want to get pregnant?"

"No. I mean… yes, one day, but I don't think I wanted it here, on this island," she confessed when looking at him. "And then Juliet told me what happens to the pregnant women on this island and I'm actually relieved I'm not… It's just… I think that subconsciously I wanted to have something… someone… else to love but you. I don't have any family left, Jack and I'm sorry if you don't feel comfortable with me possibly being pregnant. I just…"

"Shush," he tried to calm her down by taking her into his arms again and stroking her hair. "Wait… what happens to the pregnant women on this island?" he asked like he just now realized she mentioned that.

So she explained. And met with a horrified gaze when he looked at her again.

"I'm so sorry for not being careful. I just… I didn't know."

"I know." He nodded, still being a little shocked. "I know. We had no way of knowing, but… it's a good thing that we're out of the woods for now. And…"

"I know. You don't even have to say anything. No sex till we're rescued. We can't risk it."

"I can't risk it. Don't you understand, Alice?" He cupped her face and looked her in the eye so intensely that she stopped breathing. "I can't lose you. Not now. Not ever. I just won't. I love you too much."

She couldn't react any other way but by kissing him, even though they needed to stop before things got too heated up.

"Are we ever going to get out of this island?" she asked when breaking the kiss and resting her forehead against his own.

She never met with any answer, but he didn't have to say anything anyway. They both knew the truth. Their chances were slim. They'd been slim in the day of the crash when they'd gotten off course and it'd only gotten worse since then…

Alice had been in a pretty somber mood recently. Everything had changed since the moment Juliet told her what happened to pregnant women on the island. It was like something shifted in her brain, like a curtain that she'd put there before to obscure the truth was now pushed back, revealing the hidden picture. She'd actually made herself believe that she could have a life here. That she could stay on the island with Jack among their small community and just live. How wrong was she. The island would never be home and she would never have a chance to create anything on it. It was hell on earth even with its miracles. No miracle happened to her or to Sun. Locke might've started walking again and the island might've healed Jin's infertility problem, but for some reason it caused mothers and their unborn babies to die. It wasn't a place Alice wanted to stay in and she just felt hopeless and unhappy. She truly didn't know for how long she would be able to take it. She desperately started craving a normal life among civilization. She wanted to come back home. She wanted to come back to her bookshop. She wanted to start over in a real world. Only there was no starting over without them getting out and that chance died with the submarine being blown into pieces. Her bookshop had probably been already sold out on some auction and made into something else. She had no life anywhere. She was just stuck in this endless stagnation and she was sick of it.

Jack was trying to be supportive and he kept showing her how much he cared about her happiness, but he had an entire group of survivors to convince that he and Alice (who didn't bother anymore) hadn't crossed over to the dark side and that Juliet could be trusted. Still, even though he kept busy, Alice could see something slowly breaking inside of him, too. He'd almost become a father and lost both the baby and her before she would even give birth. He didn't know where they were going in this relationship anymore and what he should do to help them all escape the island. Without a boat or a submarine they had no chance and they all knew it. They'd tried building a raft once before and what happened? The others had made sure they could never leave. They couldn't possibly risk this again. They couldn't risk splitting up again and being left vulnerable.

A few days later, close to dawn, Alice was shook awake from her sleep. She frowned and groaned and then she finally opened her eyes and saw Sawyer there.

"What the hell…?" she asked in surprise when glancing at the other side of the tent where Jack slept. She wouldn't even comment on the fact that he seemed to be further and further away from her every night even though she suggested some alternative ways of consummating their relationship. Still, thanks to him not being so close, he didn't wake up now.

"Come with me. Quietly," Sawyer whispered and gestured for her to get up.

She didn't understand any of this, but she was kind of intrigued. She'd spent the last few days in constant stagnation and boredom so she could as well see what he wanted from her.

"Where are you taking me?" she asked when James led her into the jungle.

"You'll see. He told me to get you and I still ain't sure if we should go with him."

"With whom?" Alice asked another question, but then Sawyer didn't have to answer because she came face to face with John Locke. And she reacted the only way she seemed to be able to and slapped him hard across the face. "That's for blowing up the sub!" she hissed at him angrily. "Now, what the fuck do you want from us?!"

"Right there with the lady," James said with a satisfying smirk on his face and he folded his arms on his chest, waiting for Locke to explain. "You said something about capturing Ben and taking me to the guy. Why me?"

"Because it has to be you, James. You won't understand until you see it," John said in a calm voice and Alice wished that she could just break that stoic attitude of his. She just hit him and he acted like nothing happened!

"That ain't making any sense!" Sawyer protested.

"Don't you want closure, James?" Locke asked again. "I know about the man you killed in Sydney. They know everything about us."

Sawyer's expression changed and then he looked at Alice who was already looking back at him.

"And you, Alice," John continued when turning to her, "don't you want to know why exactly you've been having all those strange feelings?"

She frowned on hearing that. "What? How do you know about that? And I'm not pregnant, so…"

"Of course you're not," Locke just said and that shocked her even more. "Did you really think you were?" he prompted and she felt the need to actually hit him again. But then Sawyer's hand was on her arm, stopping her. She must've lunged at Locke without realizing it.

"Take it easy. Don't give him the satisfaction," James advised.

"You can either come with me and get all the answers you need or stay and never find out. The choice is yours," Locke said and turned around, walking away.

"Is he serious?" James asked.

"Damn it!" Alice cursed and having no choice, she followed Locke into the jungle.

Locke led them straight to the Black Rock, the very ship Rousseau had taken Jack, Kate and a few others to when they'd needed dynamite. Alice recognized this place from Jack's description and she kept on wondering what the hell they were doing there now.

She got her answer when they went inside, Locke opened a door for Sawyer and then locked him behind it.

"What the hell are you playing?!" Alice asked the older man angrily. "Let him out!"

"Not until he gets his closure," John answered calmly.

"What are you even talking about? What closure?!" she wanted to know.

"Who's that man?! Locke! Locke! Open up! Locke, let me out!" James was by now pounding on the door and Alice made a step forward, wanting to help him, but John stopped her.

"Do you want to find your answers, too?" he just asked her and she gave up. It wouldn't hurt to hear him out. After all, it was what she came here for. And she could let Sawyer out later a he wasn't being hurt in any way.

"Then talk," she just said in a belligerent tone, folding her arms on her chest just like Sawyer had done back in the jungle.

"You have all those feelings, Alice, because you're special," Locke told her when sitting down on a barrel right next to the closed door.

She was tired of asking him what the hell he meant by that, so she just stopped saying anything and settled for listening. He would have to explain at some point, wouldn't he?

"You had a twin sister, didn't you?" John asked and she frowned.

"How do you know that?" she just had to ask that question.

"You see, twins are unusually special. Their perception is stronger, more complex. Did you ever feel your sister's pain when she hurt herself?"

Alice left that question without an answer.

"Did you ever just know deep down inside that your sister was in trouble?"

She remained silent.

"Once your sister died, that connection was severed. It was lost, but it stayed open, free of the other end. It's just now opened up to a new reality, new perceptions. Believe it or not, it happened right here on this island. You can pick up feelings, premonitions of things that are about to happen. It's a gift, Alice and one day it may even help you save the life of the person you love."

For a moment there, she just stood still, thinking over those words, trying to make sense of them and trying to decide whether Locke was just crazy. It was true that she felt awful when she'd been about to see the bodies of Anna Lucia and Libby. She'd felt it again when Sawyer was about to come for her and then it only got worse before the submarine was going to explode. And she did remember the strange look Locke had shot her then.

"How do you know all of this?" she asked. "How can you be so sure it's true?"

"From Richard," John informed. "He wanted me to tell you this."

"And who's Richard?"

"He's always been on this island. He answers to Jacob."

Alice had the urge to just roll her eyes. "So let me ask who the hell is Jacob," she rephrased, getting impatient.

"He's the man behind the curtain, Alice. The one who watches over this island."

"Yeah, right," she just snorted.

"Believe it or not, but my job here is done. And I know you know that I'm telling you the truth about your premonitions."

"Whatever you say, John," she told him and then realized that she could hear no more screams coming from behind the closed door. She was already making her way to open it when she heard Sawyer roar and then…

All she could do was to stand frozen in the middle of this dark room, her eyes widely opened as she listened to what sounded like Sawyer killing the man who was in the room with him.

"Oh, I see James has finally got his closure," John spoke cheerfully and Alice looked at him incredulously.

"Are you even serious?" she hissed.

"Of course I am. I just gave Sawyer what he needed. The man in that room was his nightmare, he destroyed his whole life."

"Wait… do you mean…?" Alice started, actually knowing what John was talking about, but still, she had trouble believing it. How would the real Sawyer even get to this island? It was impossible.

Only then Locke opened the door and James walked out of there, his gaze absent somehow, his body shaking. He was clearly in shock, not realizing what happened just yet. He seemed so lost and so broken that despite the fact that Alice didn't agree with both Locke's and James's methods, she reached out to him and put her arms around him, hugging him, giving him support, showing him that she was there for him.

They didn't talk much on their way back to the beach camp. Locke had left them some time ago, coming back to the others, so they were on their own. Alice was holding James's hand almost the whole way back since she didn't know what to say or what else to do to take at least some of his burden. She knew he thought he'd feel relieved, but in fact revenge never brought one the satisfaction they expected. And in most cases, it only brought more pain by opening old wounds.

"Locke used you," she finally said, "and you lost control." She didn't know whom she wanted to convince that James was still a good person. Herself? Him? Maybe no one. Maybe she just needed to hear herself say it.

"I gave him my letter…" James finally spoke in a hoarse voice. "I told him to read it and he… he tore it apart… that was when I lost it. It was… like… like he didn't even care. And take that… he was actually Locke's father. And he threw Locke out the window on an eight floor."

Alice froze on hearing that. She realized that after a few more steps they would find themselves back on the beach, so she stopped and hugged Sawyer strongly. Then they parted.

The moment she came into view, she heard Jack calling her and then he was running towards her.

"Where were you?!" he asked angrily and she just stood still, looking at him in surprise.

"Excuse me?" she asked, her tone already getting defensive.

Jack realized what he'd done and he took a deep breath when closing his eyes.

"If you suspect I'm having an affair with Sawyer or something, you couldn't be more wrong," Alice said, thinking Jack was mad at her for disappearing when it was still dark and coming back alongside James.

"What?" Jack asked, completely taken off track and then he actually laughed. "I know you're not having an affair. I know you and I trust you completely, Alice."

"Well, then if you're done laughing about it, maybe you could tell me what has you so rattled?"

"There might be other people on this island," he informed her when putting his arm around her and leading her to their tent.

"You mean other than… the others?" she asked, seeing how ridiculously that sounded.

Once they were in their tent, Jack explained to her how Desmond, Charlie, Jin and Hurley had seen a woman parachuting onto the island and rescued her, not even telling him about it since they didn't trust him anymore. It was Kate who came to Jack to tell him everything while Alice was away.

"And take that," Jack said and his eyes actually glowed with excitement, "this woman has a radio and there's a boat a few miles off shore. We just need to find a way to contact it."

"Are you serious?!" Alice finally showed some enthusiasm after days of feeling numb. "Do you really think that this time we can make it? That we can make it off this island?"

"Yes, I really do. And I will do anything in my power for this to work."

She was so happy that she cupped his face and kissed him.

"Now, tell me what had you so upset when you came out of the jungle. Where were you?" Jack asked.

"It's not important right now, Jack." Alice dismissed everything she found out. "The boat…"

"If it's important to you, it's important to me. Tell me," he encouraged.

She knew that relaying what happened with Sawyer and the real Sawyer was not her story to tell, but she did reveal everything she heard from Locke about herself.

"And you believe him?" Jack made sure, a slight frown forming between his eyebrows.

"I don't know what to believe, Jack, but there seems to be some truth to it. It never felt entirely like a pregnancy, but I had nothing else to compare it to since it didn't exactly feel like normal fear or concern either."

"Don't you worry about it. Soon enough we'll get the hell out of this island and we won't have to be bothered by some strange guy named Jacob. All right?"

"All right." Alice nodded with a smile and then kissed Jack again.

"I think it's time to tell the rest that Juliet is a double spy, though," he suggested.

"Yeah, you're right."