First chapter out! :D It's just over 6,000 words and I'm really proud of it. ^^ Thank you for all the support from last chapter!

Weeping Wolves: It's good to be back! And yes, while I love both my online life and my real-life life, reality takes priority. Luckily for me, though, I have a four-day weekend this weekend, so I can spend time working on both my online life and my real-life life. Hope you enjoy the super-long chapter!

Leopardstar2002: Thank you for your support and Happy New Year to you too!

ilovewarriorcats: I would have updated sooner, but I had stupid math homework too. Mine was on integrals... ^^; Hope I didn't fail that quiz I had. My group project was actually okay this time, because I was working with a really cool person I met this year and her friend and we ended up making a Draw My Life type book trailer, which was pretty hilarious. :) I meant my chapter only having a life of 8 days as in the Doc had 8 days, not the chapter itself. When you upload a chapter you first upload it as a Doc, then as a chapter, and each Doc has a life of 80 days to keep from there being too many filling up your Doc Manager. The chapter will still be there, don't worry.

ShadowHawk540-2: Thank you! :) I hope you enjoy this extra long chapter in repayment for being so long gone! I had a ton of fun writing it and I think it's one of my best so far, so fingers crossed you like it too.

RANDOM PERSON: I won't mind the lack of reviews if you don't mind the lack of uploads. ^^ I do see your point about the uploading schedule I set for myself. What I'm planning on doing is to post chapters as frequently as I can, using my birthday as a motive to get me to write. If I know I won't make it (which I fully expect) then I won't force myself to churn out a bunch of sub-standard chapters just to meet the deadline. I'll take my time and make sure they're good chapters, but I know I'll need that extra kick to get myself writing again. I'll be sure to take advantage of my long weekend (for my school it's actually four days, including a teacher work day on Tuesday) and hopefully get another chapter, or at least another half chapter written by then.

Sootstar's POV

I knew this was technically considered stalking, and not the hunting type that got food for queens and all. This was the creepy type elders always warned the kits about. I distinctly remembered Lightwing warning Cinderstar, Rainstar, and me about stalkers back in the Peace Forest. But I just couldn't stop myself.

My paws sank into the layer of dead grass surrounding WindClan's camp, leaving behind a sticky trail of lumpy, brown mud. I fought the urge to wipe it all off, to twitch my paws until it flew off, out of sight. If I didn't keep this on my scent would start leaking through and who knew what that would do to the already tense atmosphere? I was lucky enough to find an unfrozen patch lying untouched near the lake.

Crouching into a snowdrift, I peered into the camp. At first, I couldn't make out which cats were which; at this distance they all looked vaguely similar. All shades of brown and gray and white against the packed, dirty snow in the main clearing. I wondered to myself why WindClan cats always complained about hunting in Leaf-bare. I would have thought they could blend in easier during this season. But I supposed they didn't rely on stealth like ThunderClan, rather relying on speed. Perhaps the snow slowed them down, though with their long legs I still doubted whether that really hindered them. Maybe with their higher centers of gravity they lost their balance easier on the slippery slopes.

I shook my head; I needed to concentrate. I had to find Rainstar. He was the only one who might be able to understand. He was always the understanding one when we were kits. I desperately wished his leadership hadn't beaten that trait out of him. I recalled the nauseating stress constantly pulling at myself, stretching my nerves tight over the claws of life. When I looked at my reflection in the lake I could barely recognize the glint in my eyes. It was the glint of a leader, of one whose heart is turning cold, of Ashthorn. I couldn't let it continue to turn.

The leader's den was… I wracked my memory, trying to remember. I'd been here before, that I was certain of. But where was the leader's den? It wasn't as though I could just stroll into the WindClan camp; I had after all just declared war earlier that night.

It should be near the place where Rainstar addressed the Clan, right? The Tall-boulder or something? I forgot exactly what it was called. Scanning the clearing again, I spotted several large rocks that could easily be used for Clan meetings. Great. Why did WindClan's camp have to be so darn confusing? Foxbrained Crowfeather, picking out this particular spot as the camp. I'd just have to investigate each one.

I began slinking down the hill, using some tactics Cinderstar taught me as apprentices for silent movement. My memory flashed back to her amused purr, her twitching tail, her teasing yet patient meow as she showed me yet again how to glide like a snake rather than lumber like a badger. Dumb memory. It always works right when I don't want it to. Desperately, I tried again to remember where Rainstar's den was, and again felt it slip through my clutches. It was there, I could feel it there, if I heard it I would know it, but I couldn't think of it. Was it closer to or farther from the entrance?

The camp slowly came into focus through the darkness. I strained my eyes, searching for any hint of the cloud-gray fur that never really lost its kit-fluff. I smiled to myself as I recalled Rainstar as a kit, bursting into laughter over Cinderstar's imagined leader name. If only she knew then that, had she begged the RiverClan leaders enough, her name might just have ended up being Cinderbloodscarfighterstar after all.

"Where are you?" I whispered to myself, trying to pull myself back to reality. "Raingigg—I mean, Rainstar, where in StarClan is your den?"

Rainstar didn't answer, though I wasn't really expecting him to. I continued down the hill, taking my time so as to avoid slipping and tumbling straight into enemy warriors. Well, WindClan warriors technically, but after tonight I supposed they were my enemies now. I wondered if they would attack me on sight. They'd certainly take me prisoner and interrogate me, for which I would have no excuses. Why was I lurking in WindClan territory if not to spy on them?

Finally, I made it to a clump of dormant thorn bushes and paused to survey the terrain, glancing quickly around to scan for movement. At first, I only spotted one ghostly guard pacing the edges of the clearing. Then another slunk out from the cover of a shadow and a third reached up to scratch their ear by the main entrance. Three guards. Did WindClan really mistrust me that much? Then again, I reflected, I hadn't given them much reason to relax recently.

The pacing guards had met by one of the boulders. Perhaps if I snuck closer I could overhear their conversation. Guards often talked loudly about the location of their leader's den, right? I snorted to myself. But then again, what other option did I have? I could wait around until sunrise, but that would defeat the entire purpose of coming here under the cover of night.

The cats were too distracted talking to notice me slinking closer, until I crouched under an outcropping of rock and, hidden in the darkness, ears straining forward so hard I almost thought they might detach from my head and fly forward into the guards, I finally could pick up their conversation.

"Cold night," one muttered to himself, shivering.

"Oh, quit whining. You've been through worse." The she-cat rolled her eyes. "Honestly, I'd think the deputy wouldn't whine about the cold when he's protecting his Clan."

"Sootstar said he'd attack in the morning, though. It's not likely he'd attack tonight after staying up to call the Gathering, would he?"

"Who knows what that rogue would do," the she-cat growled, sinking her claws into the ground. She looked at the tom with softer eyes. "I'm worried about the battle tomorrow. I know you're a good fighter, but… what if you get hurt? What if your father gets hurt?"

"I'll be fine," the tom muttered, staring off across the clearing. "We'll both be fine."

The she-cat nodded and pressed her nose into her son's fur. "Oh great StarClan, you are cold!" She grimaced sympathetically. "Hold on until moonhigh and we can switch out the watch. It's almost time, I think."

"See you later," the tom meowed, brushing past her and heading around the clearing again, sweeping his tail back and forth. He looked rather agitated, I reflected as I stepped back around the back of his boulder.

Of course they wouldn't talk about the location of the leader's den. It wasn't exactly a subject that came up in everyday conversation. I gritted my teeth as I tried to think of something else, some other tactic to try. I might have to let myself get caught to figure it out. But that would obviously be as a last resort. If WindClan warriors caught me so close to their camp the last thing they'd want to do would be to leave me alone with their leader. Well, maybe not the last thing. The last thing would probably be more like leaving me to take care of their kits while they went off on a moon-long journey or adopting me into the Clan.

But that wasn't the point. I needed to find Rainstar, and fast, if I wanted to talk with him before tomorrow. If I didn't, if I lost this chance—

A heavy weight landed on my back and I slammed into the ground, coughing as the wind was knocked from my lungs. I gasped and choked, struggling for oxygen, scrabbling at the frozen ground to push my attacker off, but they sank their hind claws into the ground on either side of me, holding me in place.

"What do you think you're doing here?" a low voice growled in my ear.

My heart leaped. Finally, after my night of bad luck, something fortunate had actually happened. "Rainstar!" I wheezed. "It's me!"

"I know who you are. What are you doing in my camp?"

His voice was cold, colder than I expected. Still breathing heavily, I tried to turn my head to stare up at him, but could only see some of his wispy fur out of the corner of my eye. He batted at me with a sheathed paw, whacking me on the nose and forcing me to stare straight ahead again.

"Talk to me, Sootstar! What... are… you… doing… here?"

I took a deep breath. Then another. My lungs still felt flattened, and Rainstar's weight pressing down on my back really wasn't helping in the slightest. "I… I need to talk to you. About tonight. What happened at the Gathering."

"What's there to talk about? You declared war on all the other Clans." Rainstar's voice was unyielding, frigid as the breeze sighing over the camp.

"Please, Rainstar, let me up. I need to see your face." He didn't answer for a moment, so I added, "Please." I wondered if he thought the desperation audible in my voice was fake.

Finally, I felt his claws release me. I pushed myself slowly to my paws, rolling sore shoulders where he'd landed on me. My lungs still felt as though they'd spent a good moon on a Thunderpath. Turning, I flattened my back against the boulder. Perhaps it would make him more at ease if he knew I couldn't escape, even if I wanted to. I searched his face, his pale blue eyes, struggling to find even a smidge of my brother in them, but they were like reflections of the boulder currently numbing my painful shoulders.

"Well?" he asked stonily.

I took a deep breath. "I…"

It was odd, how I'd been waiting all night for this moment, ever since I'd watched the last Clan leave the island, hidden in the foliage nearest to the Tree-Bridge, yet now that I was here I couldn't find the words. Rainstar wasn't helping either, his eyes exactly the shape and color of the lake when it froze over, trapping words, cats, and fish underneath.

"I want to apologize."

"Oh. Sure." Rainstar rolled his eyes. I could hardly believe what I was seeing; Rainstar looked like Cinderstar, or at least an exceptionally cruel and hateful Cinderstar. What was wrong with him?

"Rainstar, please. Listen to me."

"Don't you 'Rainstar, please' me. Spit out your real reason."

"Listen to me. I did not come here to fight you." I shoved my face closer to Rainstar's. "I came to talk as brother to brother. You're the only one who might be able to understand me."

Rainstar didn't reply, but I thought I saw something swimming in his eyes, like a fish was trying to break free. For a heartbeat I thought it might be the kit I used to play with, the apprentice I helped teach how to stand up for himself. My heart jumped into my throat. Could this idea actually work?

"I know you probably hate me because of what I did at the Gathering," I said in a rush. Now that I had confidence that Rainstar might believe me, the words started tumbling out of me like the waterfall at the Moonpool. "And it's true, I was a… a…"

"Foxhearted rogue," Rainstar suggested calmly.

At an earlier time I would have thought he was joking. Now I wasn't sure if he was or not. For the first time in a moon, I wished for our easy mind-speak back.

"Um, yeah. I was a foxhearted rogue. But, listen, I didn't mean for that to be me. I never wanted a war. Never." I glanced skyward, to where the lights of StarClan glimmered between hazy clouds the color of my fur. "I just… my anger took control. I couldn't stop it, I didn't know how."

"You didn't want a war but you were angry at us?" Rainstar asked, sounding merely confused.

"No. I mean yes, I didn't—don't—want a war, and yes I was mad, but not at you. Not at the Clans."

"At Ashthorn," Rainstar murmured.

"Yes." I paused, watching Rainstar's expression. For a moment, just a moment, as he stared at the ground, he looked almost normal. Then his eyes snapped up to me again and he turned back into the frost gremlin. Almost there.

"You're obsessed with him. If you hate him so much, let it go. It's not good to constantly obsess over something you hate—over someone you hate."

"But it's not that simple." I scuffed my paw against the ground, kicking up a shower of ice crystals.

"But it is." Rainstar stared earnestly into my eyes. I glanced up and caught a genuinely Rainstar expression for the first time that night. "It is, Sootstar. If you'd just put your past behind you, you'd see Ashthorn actually—"

"Wants the best for us?" I finished bitterly. "Do you really think that's true? After all he put us through?"

"He apologized," Rainstar said fiercely, "and so did you, I might add."

I turned away, the old anger rising inside me again. Closing my eyes, I imagined seeing Ashthorn in front of me now. My claws vibrated, ready for action.

"Sootstar," Rainstar said tentatively. "Do you know what I heard from one of the older warriors yesterday?" I didn't reply, and after a moment he continued. "She said the reason you hate someone is because you see the same thing in yourself and you hate it. Only by changing yourself can you get over your hatred of them. It's… it's actually helped me a lot."

I scoffed. "Helped you? I'd be surprised if you've ever even disliked anyone before."

"Actually…" Rainstar hesitated, biting his lip. "Um…"

I turned toward him, staring him in the eyes. My anger still throbbed beneath my pelt, so forcefully I didn't even register the vulnerable expression I'd seen so frequently on him as a kit, when he'd been teased by Adderkit. I didn't realize I should've stopped. "What, Rainstar? Spit it out."

Rainstar stared at me for a moment, and his face turned blank, almost considering. "It's helped me get over my hatred of you, Sootstar. That's what."

I stepped backward, my mind reeling. Rainstar? My little brother? Hate me? Hate me?

"That's right, Sootstar. I'm… I'm sorry it had to come out like this. But it's true. And you know what?" He shoved his chin forward. "The truth is more important to me than keeping you safe in your little bubble. I should have told you earlier, I suppose, maybe at the Gathering. But I didn't know it would escalate that far."

I suddenly realized my anger had faded. Was it even possible to stay angry at Rainstar for more than a few moments? I'd never tried.

"Do… do you really…"

Rainstar looked back at the ground, his momentary courage fading like morning mist on the lake. "Not anymore. Well, maybe a little. But you came with an apology, and I suppose that means there's still Sootstar somewhere inside there. Somewhere inside that hatred."

"Why?" My voice came out like a kit's mewl. I coughed, cleared my throat, but before I could try again Rainstar spoke.

"Because you stopped me from having a relationship with my father."

"But he's dead. You can't exactly—"

"He came to me in a dream, Sootstar. Cinderstar too, I bet. I'm not surprised he didn't come to you, though."

I stared at the ground as Rainstar's voice faded, the snow sucking up the echoes like sand sucking up water. Something seemed not quite right about his argument. "You said you hated me. But wouldn't that mean you saw something of yourself in me? Something to hate?"

Rainstar glanced at his paws. "Yeah. I guess maybe… maybe I felt guilty about keeping you away from Dawnshine. After the battle where Silverdapple died, you didn't want to go showing off your love for her in front of me because you had a special she-cat and I didn't anymore.

" 'Didn't'?" I repeated. "Past tense?"

Rainstar swallowed. "Um, yeah. I mean no, present—I mean…"

I touched my tail to his shoulder. "Hey. Don't strangle yourself." As he glanced up at me I tried for a small smile, my heart leaping when he returned it. "It's complicated, huh?"

"I guess."

"Well, whoever it is, I think you should give her a chance. Silverdapple wouldn't want you to keep grieving forever."

"Yeah I know. I'm trying."

I let the matter drop. After all, I hadn't come here to counsel Rainstar on his love life, however much I would prefer to be talking about it. It transported me back to half a moon ago when we had just arrived and I could tease him about Silverpaw all I wanted.

Taking a deep, uneven breath, Rainstar pulled away, turning to face me again with an attempt to reform his unemotional expression of before. "So, you started a… a war because you hated Ashthorn."

"Well…" I hesitated. Phrased like that it sounded stupid, petty. Like something a kit might do. "I didn't mean to start a war," I repeated. I didn't know what else to say.

Rainstar flicked his tail. He was really getting the hang of being the unfeeling enemy leader again. "Hate to break it to you, but you kind of did. Whether you meant to or not, it's done."

"I know. It's why I came to you." I took a deep breath, trying to still my own emotions into an expression like Rainstar's. If he wanted to play this diplomatic game, I wouldn't stop him. "I need you to convince the other leaders to not fight tomorrow."

"Why would I do that? You might try to take us off-guard."

I stared into his eyes, suddenly pleading, my stoic façade shattering like an icicle falling onto a rock. "Do you really think I'd do that? I already told you—"

"Sootstar, I don't think you would. But that's beside the point. Do you really think Mossystar or Rockstar would be prepared to believe you've seen the error of your ways and want to prevent the battle?"

I gritted my teeth. "No. But that's exactly my point. If you told them—"

"Don't you know me at all? It's not for nothing I'm known as the softhearted leader, and everyone knows I'm your brother! Do you think they'd be surprised you managed to convince me?" He looked away, the fur along his spine bristling in agitation.

I gazed up to the crest of the hill in the direction I knew the lake must be. Rainstar had a point; it would be hard enough convincing Cinderstar, much less Mossystar and Rockstar. They'd never believe he didn't want to fight. Unless…

"What if we just refuse to fight?"

"What do you mean?" Rainstar gazed at me quizzically.

"I mean what if tomorrow comes and the Clans are facing each other on the battlefield and ThunderClan and WindClan refuse to attack?"

"We'd get clobbered by the other Clans. Especially ThunderClan. Especially you. I bet half the cats in all the Clans want to kill you. Somehow I don't think you have enough lives for them all to have a go."

"We'd protect ourselves, obviously, but otherwise refuse to fight. We wouldn't unsheathe our claws or something."

"That's gotta be one of the worst solutions I've ever heard of."

"You got a better one? Maybe if I show them I won't fight rather than telling them they'd believe me," I added when Rainstar didn't answer.

He rolled his eyes, but half-smiled all the same. "Okay, fine. Harebrain."

"Mousebrain."

I'd almost made it back to camp before I heard the yowl. My confident, energetic mood vanished as I recognized the voice.

Ground flashed beneath my paws, splashing past like I was running up a stream. I watched the path, fear sharpening my eyesight as I searched for mischievous roots or fronds that may have looped across the path in an attempt to trip passersby. I couldn't be one of their victims tonight.

The ground opened before me—I'd made it to camp. Slipping around the edge, I glanced down into the hollow. It looked fine, but perhaps the enemy attacking force had already retreated, leaving destruction in its wake.

I found Molewhisker guarding the entrance, sitting right where I'd left him. Skidding to a halt in the snow to avoid crashing into him, I stared at him in wild confusion.

"Ah, Sootstar, you're back," he smiled. "And just in time, too."

"W—What?" I stammered.

"It's got to be almost time, I think. I haven't heard anything from inside yet, but it's been about long enough I think." He shrugged. "Not really my area of expertise anyway."

"Huh?" I had just enough of my wits left to curse myself for sounding like such an apprentice. Of all the things I could've said, it had to be Huh. Not even a What. But it was swamped almost immediately again in thoughts of Dawnshine's cry, filled with such pain…

"It's okay to be nervous, I know it's your first time," Molewhisker assured me. "But I promise you, it's absolutely inc—"

"What are you talking about?" I demanded.

Molewhisker blinked. "Dawnshine's kitting. Didn't you know?"

"Dawnshine's—what?!"

Molewhisker rolled his eyes with a purr and stepped aside to leave me more room. I wriggled through the opening just as another yowl echoed around the camp.

"Good luck," Molewhisker said. "You'll need it."

"Why am I going to need it?" I asked distractedly, staring around camp. I'd momentarily forgotten where the nursery was.

"To convince Goldenwing to let you in."

Of course, it was under the bramble bush. I darted toward it and began ducking through the entrance, but was blocked by a mass of pale ginger fur. I tried to peer around it, but only succeeded in poking myself in the nose with a thorn.

"Ow! Foxdung!"

"Sootstar?" Amberwing's round eyes appeared in the entrance.

"Amberwing! Can you let me through?"

"Sorry, no can do. Goldenwing told me to block any cats from entering."

"But I'm Dawnshine's mate!"

"She said to especially watch out for you. Sorry." She turned back to face the inside as another drawn-out howl emitted from inside, rattling my eardrums. Flattening my ears against my head, I tried again.

"Please, Amberwing! I haven't seen her all tonight! Can't I at least say hello?"

Amberwing didn't even acknowledge my words. She shifted against the entrance, blocking it more firmly with her body.

"It's no use." I glanced down in surprise to see a large tomkit with Amberwing's fur. He stared morosely at me before glancing at his mother. "Sunkit and I tried sneaking in around back while Maplekit distracted her but Maplekit followed us too soon and she realized what we were up to."

"It wasn't my fault!" A brown and cream she-kit batted the tom around the ears. "I wanted to see the kits and I thought I heard you two inside!"

"Sure," the tom scoffed.

"There's a way in around back?" I asked, my heart speeding up with a new surge of adrenaline. If I could only slip in through a back entrance…

"Don't you dare." Amberwing's muffled voice sounded from inside the nursery. Her eyes reappeared and she stared reprovingly at me.

"I didn't do anything!" the tom grumbled.

"Not you, Birchkit dear, you're fine. I was talking to Sootstar."

"Oh. Okay." Birchkit whacked Maplekit around the ears in retaliation for her earlier blow and dashed off across the camp. Maplekit shrieked and plunged after him, slipping on the snow and slamming into his side. Their squeals echoed across the camp.

A loud cracking sound split the nursery air. Amberwing's eyes went wide and she whipped around, leaving half the entrance uncovered. "Are they coming?" I heard her ask quietly.

"Shut up, I'm trying to concentrate," a muffled meow replied. Amberwing's tail twitched but she didn't repeat her question.

I peered in around the side, pressing myself into the thorny side of the nursery's entrance. I realized for a heartbeat that the mud from earlier still caked my fur, but I didn't really care. Dawnshine was inside, and possibly one of my kits. My kits.

A high-pitched squeal sounded from a distant corner of the nursery. I strained my neck, but could only see Dawnshine's fluffy tail and Goldenwing's hunched back. Finally, abandoning all restraint, I shoved my way forward, my broad shoulders knocking Amberwing aside. She didn't even try to stop me.

Inside, it smelled like warmth and something strange I couldn't quite place. Scanning the arrangement of mossy nests, my eyes fell on the one farthest from the entrance, safe from the worst of the cold. Inside lay Dawnshine, spread out over her moss like a limp rabbit, and at her belly lay a bedraggled kit, its fur almost black with dampness. Goldenwing was busy rubbing it from nose to tail-tip, licking the wet away to prevent the newborn from getting chilled, fluffing up its fur to protect it from the wind's snowy touch.

I held my breath, not daring to edge closer. What if I brought cold air into the nursery, too cold for the kit? It looked even limper than Dawnshine, about the same size as a mouse. I silently willed it to move, just a little bit, a tiny whisker-twitch to let me know it was fighting. I'd heard stories about stillborn kits back in the Peace Forest but never really considered the horror of it until now. I couldn't imagine what it must be like to have only one kit and to have that kit be stillborn. I found myself praying desperately that it wouldn't be the case with Dawnshine and me.

A loud howl echoed around the nursery. At first I thought it was Dawnshine, but she wouldn't have been able to produce such a loud noise with that stick still locked in her jaws. After a moment of confusion I realized it must have come from the kit.

"It's a tom!" Goldenwing called, visibly relaxing as she gave him a few last licks and set him beside Dawnshine's belly. I padded cautiously closer and bent to sniff at the kit. My kit. My son.

Goldenwing glared at me for a moment but as Dawnshine tensed again she turned back, pressing a paw to her belly. "Almost there," she encouraged in a low voice.

I barely glanced at Dawnshine, I was so fascinated by the kit. His tiny paws, speckled with white like his miniscule muzzle, felt around him, reaching out to the sides and above his head until he rubbed against Dawnshine's soft belly fur. He seemed calm as of right now, but I couldn't help but remember his first cry. How could something so small and delicate make such a loud sound?

"Push!" Goldenwing commanded. I looked up at Dawnshine as she strained again, pressing her teeth into the stick. It held, but trembled from the pressure as Goldenwing pulled a second kit to her paws and went to work furiously licking it.

This kit took less time to warm up, wriggling around after only about six swipes of Goldenwing's tongue. It pressed a paw to her nose as it arched its back and mewled loudly, though not quite as loudly as the first tom.

"A she-kit!" Goldenwing deposited her beside her brother as, for a third time, Dawnshine began panting and straining.

I tentatively sniffed the she-kit. Her fur was lighter like Dawnshine's, though with more tabby markings than her mother, who only had a couple darker marks here and there. She leaned into her brother, soaking in his warmth, as she reached forward for Dawnshine.

"Push!" This time I looked at Goldenwing, but I glanced away just as quickly as Dawnshine heaved and cracked her stick a second time. There were just some things toms weren't meant to see.

Goldenwing nodded at me to help Dawnshine as she began rubbing the third kit. Dawnshine let go of her stick and spat out a couple splinters, flopping her head down onto her moss in exhaustion. "How many left?" she croaked.

"Just this one." Goldenwing paused in her frantic cleaning of the third kit to press her paw against Dawnshine's belly in confirmation. "Yeah, just one."

"Thank StarClan," Dawnshine murmured, closing her eyes. "I don't think I could take any more."

I got the feeling I was meant to do something. Leaning down, I awkwardly licked the top of her head. "You're, erm, doing great," I said, though truthfully I had no idea how good she actually was doing.

Dawnshine smiled softly, just the corners of her mouth twitching upward for a heartbeat. Then she grimaced again, her body stiffening. I quickly nosed what was left of her stick toward her muzzle and she grabbed hold of it, clenching it tightly, her sharp teeth digging into the bark.

"It's another girl!" Goldenwing meowed briefly before turning back to Dawnshine.

I nosed my second daughter closer to my other kits. My kits. I still couldn't quite believe this was happening. It was all so surreal. Though I supposed for Dawnshine this was anything but surreal. She mur-r-owed in pain and her whole face scrunched up as she strained, pushing the last kit into the world.

"Another tom!" Goldenwing bent her head quickly and began cleaning him, but I nosed her hard enough to force her to look up at me. "What?" she snapped.

"I'd like to do this one," I said.

Goldenwing rolled her eyes in irritation. "Fine. Do whatever. He's your kit." She picked him up and deposited him in front of me, gentle despite her harsh words from earlier. She padded around to Dawnshine's head and pressed her nose against her ears. "Congratulations," she whispered. "You did a great job. And look, you have four beautiful kits now." She smiled.

I began licking my son, rubbing him the way I'd seen Goldenwing clean the other three—starting with the chest and moving upward toward the head, then down to the tail. It was an odd taste, nothing I'd imagined tasting before, and I'd tasted some strange things on my fur in my time. It was rather slimy and salty. I almost spat it out, but then realized I'd be spitting it out onto my kit.

Finally, after I'd gotten him to squeal a little and fluffed his mostly dry fur, I placed him next to his siblings. Dawnshine blinked open her eyes and gazed at them, lying neatly in a row along her belly. "Four kits," she murmured sleepily.

"It's over average size, I think," I meowed, pressing my nose to the top of her head. "I'm so proud of you."

She leaned into my touch, purring for a moment, then gazed back at the kits. "What should we name them?" she asked, suppressing a yawn.

I followed her gaze to the kits. Before they were born I'd fantasized about what names I'd give them, but now they seemed overblown and ridiculous. Who names their kit something like Hawkkit? First off, there's the syllable clash, and second off there's the expectation of the kit being a great fighter. What if they decide to be a medicine cat? Last I checked, hawks weren't very good at chewing up marigold leaves to make a poultice.

"I dunno," I murmured. "What do you think?"

She nudged me. "I was focused on other things during their kitting. You seemed fascinated with the first two, though. How about you name them?"

"Fine. As long as you get the next two."

She purred softly but didn't answer beyond that. I hoped it was assent.

I gazed first at the dark gray tom, then at the pale gray she-kit. One like me, the other like Dawnshine. I wondered if they'd have eyes like ours to boot.

"The tom practically howled as he was being cleaned," I remembered. "How about Wolfkit, for his strong voice?"

Dawnshine rested her head against my shoulder. "Mmm," she murmured. "Wolfkit it is."

"And the she-kit, she pressed a paw against Goldenwing's nose as she was being cleaned. I thought it was because she was annoyed at being cleaned, but maybe it's more that she felt a connection with Goldenwing. Like she secretly wants to be a medicine cat."

Dawnshine snorted. "You can't tell that after she's only a couple moments old. That's mousebrained."

"You said I could name her," I reminded Dawnshine teasingly. "I think she should be named after an herb."

"Which one?"

I cast my mind around. What herb would suit her best? Actually it was more like what herb could I think up on short notice. My mind was coming up with a blank.

"Well?"

"Um… sage," I said finally.

"Sagekit?"

"Yeah. Sagekit."

"I like it," Dawnshine purred. "Wolfkit and Sagekit. Two beautiful kits."

"What about the other two?" I nosed her cheek. "You said you'd name them."

"I didn't actually say so," she teased, her pale blue eyes sparkling with laughter. But she grew serious again as she stared at the other two kits, considering them. "The other she-kit looks like river water. It's so dark, like yours."

"We're not naming her Riverkit or Waterkit," I said immediately. "Riverkit's been taken by Riverstar and Waterkit sounds dumb."

"Don't insult the names," Dawnshine protested, but she smiled anyway. "I wasn't thinking of those. I was thinking of how willow trees usually grow around rivers, all clustered in groups."

"Willowkit?"

"Why not?"

I considered it for a heartbeat. It was a good name, I couldn't deny that. I smiled. "Wolfkit, Sagekit, and Willowkit." I paused for a moment then, gazing at the fourth kit. "What do you want to name the last one?"

"I…" She yawned again and her eyes slid closed. "I'm too tired. You think of one."

"You said you'd name the last two!" I protested, poking her in the side. "You can't go to sleep on me now!"

"You cleaned him. You seemed to connect with him."

"But I'm too tired."

"Well what if I'm tired too?"

She fixed me with a piercing look. "Who just gave birth to four kits, you or me?" she asked. I didn't reply. "Exactly," she said. "Who's more tired, me or you?"

"But he has your fur. He should connect with you."

"He has yours too. Look at his forelegs and tail. All stripedy. Like shadows from tree branches."

"Okay then. We'll name him Shad—"

"Shadowkit's been taken by Shadowstar, as you so kindly pointed out about Riverkit."

"I… I wasn't going to say Shadowkit," I invented.

"Liar."

"No, really!"

"What were you going to name him then?"

"I was going to name him… Shadekit." I grinned. "See? Wasn't going to say Shadowkit at all. I know it's already been taken."

Dawnshine reached up and pressed her nose against the side of my muzzle. "You know what I think? I think we're both too tired to think properly." She smiled up at me. "Go sleep. I'll look after the kits."

"I'm not leaving you," I insisted, circling around behind her and pressing against her spine, resting my chin on my paws to gaze at the kits. My kits. I'm a father.

"Oh, fine," Dawnshine whispered, flopping down beside me. She shut her eyes and exhaled slowly, relaxing into the moss.

I stayed awake as she drifted off to sleep. I knew I needed to be awake for tomorrow, what with it being the day of the battle/not-battle and all, but I just couldn't seem to relax. I kept staring at the kits. Wolfkit, Sagekit, Willowkit, and Shadekit. My kits. My kits. It was just so overwhelming.

I pressed my cheek against Dawnshine's shoulder. She shifted a little but didn't wake up, already snoring a little. It was just a little hum as she exhaled. I realized I'd never actually listened to her sleep before. It was comforting, but not quite enough to lull me to sleep. I kept waiting for the next noise, then the next, then the next. Then one of the kits started snoring too.

At some point I must have fallen asleep, because sooner than I would've thought possible the light was streaming through the nursery entrance, blinding me. The night had ended, and it was time to face the morning.

I couldn't quite figure out how to end it... Hope it's good anyway.

I absolutely adore the kits! Thanks to everyone who submitted OCs for consideration! I know I originally said three, but I ended up deciding to accept four because I couldn't decide between them all. ^^;

QOTD (because why not): Did you make any New Years resolutions? If so, have you kept them so far? If not, any particular reason why?

Next chapter will hopefully be out soon!