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BOOOOOM!
A black wall was blown apart by Keldeo's Focus Blast.
No matter what we say or do,
Keldeo activated his Secret Sword and swung it, causing the screen to burst.
It's never up to me and you,
Victini rose into the air, his ears glowing with the power of V-Create.
We smile now and sing a cheer!
Keldeo and Santa Paws screamed in horror as huge burst of dark purple energy erupted in front of them.
Ghost Pony Rider roared.
Kyurem and Cryogonal the Critics both screamed as a zombie Lucario with a chainsaw appeared on their TV.
Keldeo screamed in horror, but sprayed himself with water to snap out of it.
Imperator Justinian was seated behind a desk in his study, with Keldeo standing on the other side.
The show must go on!
"FORESHADOWING!" Munna exclaimed.
"NO SHIP, SHERCLOCK!" the Intoxiquer shouted.
"SPOILERS!" Zorua exclaimed.
The show must go on!
Jack Storm sprung awake in shock.
Matthais Unidostres and BrickBrony1894 bro-hoofed.
Meloetta sat down with Madoka the Fennekin and Damian the Meloetta on either side of her.
A Greninja stood ominously next to a Lucario with red Aura.
Keldeo and Ryan the Lucario fought on a cliff top, Secret Sword and Bone Rush clashing over and over.
Never fear . . .
Button Mash and Sweetie Belle bonked heads as they tried playing Wonderbolt Free Fliers.
Keldeo burst out of the ice encasing him in an explosion of light.
The show! Will! Go! On!
Keldeo reared up on his hind legs, his expression serious and his Secret Sword raised and glowing brightly.
Keldeo the Critic
Season 4 Episode 14: A Pika Childhood by Bluewolfbat
Title Card TinyURL: qghgazu
"Do, do, do do do do. Do, do, do do do do," Keldeo sang to himself happily as he pranced over to his usual spot for reviewing. He placed his laptop down on the rock platform, opened it, and went to open the file containing the fanfic he was about to review.
"STOP!"
Keldeo jumped in shock, and turned around to see who had shouted at him. To his surprise, he saw an out of breath Eevee panting in exhaustion before him.
The Eevee eventually caught her breath after about a solid minute of heavy breathing, then she looked up at Keldeo and said, "You cannot review that story! Whatever you do, don't review that story! Something terrible will happen if you review it!"
Keldeo stared long and hard at the Eevee. Then, with a deadpan expression, he replied, "It's A Pika Childhood by Bluewolfbat."
A Pika Childhood
By: Bluewolfbat
A series of One-Shots about what Ash and Pikachu's lives and adventures might have been like if these best buddies had met during Ash's childhood. What kind of adventures, you ask? Read and find out.
"This is probably one of the most innocuous, harmless, inoffensive, cutest fanfic I will probably ever review, let alone read," Keldeo said, looking entirely unconcerned with the worried faces Eevee was making, "How could reviewing this fanfic possibly cause something terrible to happen?"
"You don't understand," Eevee said in a panicky manner, "This fanfic is too cute to review! It's cuteness is too powerful! Reading it infects your mind, and reviewing it would give it the ability to use the internet to exert its terrible power over the entire world! There'd be no escaping from it!"
Keldeo raised an eyebrow as he stared at Eevee with disbelief and pity. "How the hay could you possibly be sure of all that?"
"Well I-."
"Why should I even believe you!? Do you have any idea how ridiculous what you just said was?" Keldeo asked.
"Look at me!" the Eevee shouted as she pointed at her face with her right forepaw, "Don't you see how scared and nervous and frightened I am! Doesn't that mean anything?"
Keldeo eyed Eevee suspiciously, and then he asked, "You're Serena's Eevee, aren't you?"
"Yeah," Eevee said with a nod.
"Well you know something? I think you're the most annoying character in all of Pokemon XY The Series. I tried to be patient with you, but the fact is that you make Fluttershy look brave! And you can make all the scared faces you want, but it doesn't matter because that's the way you look 75% of the time in the show anyway! So don't bother me while I'm reviewing this fanfic."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Eevee shouted.
Keldeo opened the file, and there was a huge burst of light that blew Keldeo backwards next to Eevee. When Keldeo's eyesight recovered, he looked and gasped when he saw a seven year old Ash Ketchum standing next to a slightly chubbier Pikachu.
"Aha! After a whole year we're free! It's time to conquer Earth!" the young Ash said.
Keldeo groaned and said, "Okay, what review are we parodying here? Turbo: A Power Ranger's Movie or Hocus Pocus?"
Kid!Ash looked at Keldeo and smiled, "Oooooh! Wow! A pony! You'll be perfect to ride and hug and stuff!"
Keldeo backed away, looking and feeling a bit uncomfortable, "Uh, I think I'm getting Double Rainboom flashbacks. . ."
Kid!Ash got down on his knees, turned to Pikachu, smiled and said, "Let's claim him, Pikachu!"
Eevee gasped and quickly jumped in front of Keldeo and used Protect. At that moment, Kid!Ash began to tickle Pikachu in the stomach. As the pair laughed, Keldeo looked at Eevee and said, "Uh, would you mind filling me in, Eevee?"
Suddenly, the other three Swords of Justice ran in.
"What's going on, Keldeo?" Cobalion asked, "We saw that flash of light and-" He suddenly froze along with Virizion and Terrakion when the three of them spotted Kid!Ash and Pikachu giggling in a most adorable fashion.
All three Swords of Justice tilted their heads, and said with wide eyes and dopey smiles, "Awwwwwwww."
"Oh, they are so precious!" Cobalion drawled in an uncharacteristically high sounding voice.
"Cobalion!?" Keldeo shouted, his eyes wide with disbelief.
Kid!Ash got up and laughed, "Wow! I got three horsies to play with!" He looked the three smiling Pokemon up and down. Then, Kid!Ash frowned and said, "But they're not ponies, aren't they, Pikachu?"
Pikachu frowned as well and shook his head.
Kid!Ash nodded, "Right! What we want is the pony! And the foxy too! Let's-" He turned, but froze when he saw that Keldeo and Eevee had fled, and they even took the laptop with them.
"Awwwwwww," Kid!Ash said with a pout.
As Keldeo and Eevee ran, Keldeo turned to Eevee and said, "How the hay did you know that of all things was gonna happen!"
"It's my business to know!" Eevee replied, "I have a high position in the Kawaii Club! Wanna see a membership card?" Eevee then reached into the fur around her neck and pulled out a small card (hy4bodv).
Keldeo looked at it, then looked at Eevee and demanded, "Why didn't you show me that earlier!"
"You wouldn't let me!" Eevee shouted in desperation as she put the card back.
Keldeo sighed as they continued running, "Oh, alright. I'm sorry. So, how do we stop them?"
"I don't know! Nobody knows! That's why they're so dangerous! They'll take over the entire world with the power of cuteness!" Eevee shouted.
"Seriously? the power of-? Gah! Look, just relax, I've got an idea. Follow me!" Keldeo said, and he quickly guided Eevee into the forest and in a section secluded by bushes.
Keldeo sat down, took his laptop out of his saddle bags, and opened it up.
"What are you doing?" Eevee asked nervously, looking around fearfully.
"I'm gonna do what usually fixes fanfic related problems: review this story all the way through," Keldeo replied.
"What!?" Eevee exclaimed, "But that's what caused this problem!"
Keldeo shrugged, "It couldn't make things any worse, could it? Besides, there's nothing else we can do right now, so we might as well try this. So try to get a hold of yourself, Eevee. This is A Pika Childhood."
"So, it turns out that this story takes place in an alternate timeline where Ash got Pikachu when he was seven years old instead of ten years old. Interesting premise. Let's she where the story goes from there."
Chapter 1: A Special Surprise
Ash woke up bright and early in the morning as he got ready for the day. However, today was a special day for Ash; Ash was turning seven years old! Ash had always had a fascination and passion for Pokémon, and as a special treat, Ash's mom said that she would take him to Professor Oak's lab to get a Pokémon of his own. Ash was so excited!
After greeting his mom and having Breakfast, Ash's mom wanted to talk with him.
"Now Ash, are you sure you want a Pokémon? Remember, a Pokémon is a lot of responsibility, and you have to be the one to talk care of it," Ash's mom said, trying to make Ash understand what he was getting into.
"I understand mom. I've been trying to learn as much as I can about how to take care of Pokémon. I promise I'll take care of it," Ash replied.
Keldeo stopped to think for a moment, and he said, "So. . . 10 year old Ash stays up late the night before and oversleeps. . . but 7 year old Ash wakes up bright and early and is ready to go. . ." Keldeo frowned, "Iris is right, Ash is a little kid."
"But wait, if Ash doesn't arrive late, then how does he get paired up with Pikachu?"
"Professor, please tell me you have some Pokémon that are safe for Ash," Ash's mom said, concerned about her son's safety.
"Don't worry, Mrs. Ketchum. I'll make sure we find the right one," Professor Oak replied. A long time went by before Ash and his mom agreed on three Pokémon. They were A Squirtle, an Eevee, and a Bulbasuar.
"Okay, so Delia must have said no the Charmander because he didn't want Ash to get burned, I get that. But what's an Eevee doing there? Eevee isn't a starter! And aren't those Pokemon supposed to be rare and hard to find?" Keldeo asked.
"It's true. We are. We like to keep hidden," Eevee chimed in.
"Oh, I forgot you were there for a moment," Keldeo remarked.
However, just as the professor was lining up the three Pokémon, another Pokémon caught Ash's attention.
"Hey, what about that one?" Ash asked going over to a cage with a different Pokémon in it. The Pokémon looked to be about the size of Ash's body,
"Meaning that in this story, either Ash is a midget or Pikachu is Super Sized like a Pumpkaboo," Keldeo remarked dryly.
it was furry, yellow, had two red circles on it's cheeks, and it's tail was shaped like a lightening bolt.
"Pikachu," the Pokémon said. Professor Oak and Ash's mom went over to see the Pokémon Ash was looking at.
"Professor, what do you think about this one?" Ash's mom asked nervously. Something about the yellow Pokémon gave her an uneasy feeling.
"Hmmmm. This one isn't that comfortable around strangers, but then again, Pikachu can be shy. Let's try giving it some food," Professor Oak replied. The man then got out some food and feed the Pokémon,. After a few times, Professor Oak let both Ash and his mom feed the Pokémon.
"This Pokémon is Pikachu. They are an electric Pokémon, and are usually hard to find and train, but it can be done. All it takes is time and patience," Professor Oak explained. Pikachu gently took the food. Professor Oak then carefully let Pikachu out and let Pikachu sniff Ash and his mom.
"Pikachu," the Pokémon said sweetly as it smiled at them.
"It's cute, but isn't it dangerous? You said it was an electric type," Ash's mom commented, starting to feel nervous again.
"Yes, however, some Pikachu don't create a lot of electricity because they are either still learning how to control it. That is the case for this one. Luckily, it knows when to control it, and how much to release. He rarely shocks people, and this one is new. Surprisingly, he seems to be calm around new visitors" Professor Oak answered. Ash's mom nodded.
"Ash, how about we go outside and talk about which Pokemon you want?" Ash's mom suggested. Ash agreed and as they got up, the mother and son started walking of the lab.
"Pika?" Pikachu said, like it was confused and concerned as to why the boy and his mom were leaving.
"It's okay, Pikachu. They're just leaving-" Professor Oak said until he was interrupted.
"Pika! Pika, Pika! Pikachu!" Pikachu cried out as it misunderstood the Professor's words. Pikachu didn't want this boy to leave, he liked him! Pikachu tried to get away, but Professor Oak knew this Pikachu had just met Ash and his mom. Who knows what it might do to them if it got out of hand!
"Pikachu, I'm sorry, but for now you'll just have to wait!" Professor Oak said as he tried to get the Pokémon back into it's cage. Eventually, as Pikachu kept struggling, it broke free of the Professor's grip and ran right for the boy and his mom.
"Ash! Delia! Look out!" Professor Oak called out to them. Ash and his mom turned around, and saw Pikachu running right for them!
"Ahhhhh!" Ash's mom cried out as the yellow, furry creature looked like it was going to run right at them. What happened next surprised everyone. Pikachu started to slow down, ran up to Ash, and hugged his leg. Pikachu looked back at the professor and shook it's head.
"Pikachu. Pika," the Pokémon said sadly with tears appearing in it's eyes. Everyone just stared at Pikachu.
"Well Delia, I don't know how to say this, but I think Pikachu wants to be Ash's Pokémon!" Professor Oak said dumfounded. Ash slowly knelled down and rubbed Pikachu on the head. Everyone could see how much Pikachu liked Ash, and how Ash responded back. It was clear that Pikachu wouldn't leave without Ash.
"I agree. Thank you Professor," Ash's mom said back. After doing the paperwork, Ash and his mom went home with Pikachu in the back seat.
Keldeo looked on with an extremely dumbfounded expression on his face. "Wow. . . well, this is. . . character assassination."
"What's wrong?" Eevee asked.
"Pikachu did not like Ash the moment he saw him!" Keldeo complained, "Pikachu hated all humans! Pikachu only started liking Ash because he put himself in danger to protect him from a flock of Spearows. Then their bond strengthened from there. Having them immediately click like this is not only lazy writing, but it also takes away the meaning of their bond. It's not sacrificial or heartfelt. It's not the result of growth and character development. It's just puppy love. I mean, sure, I guess the flock of Spearows scene would be too extreme for a fanfic like this. But couldn't we have gotten some scenes of Ash begging to take Pikachu home, Pikachu begrudgingly giving Ash a chance after seeing how much he wants him, then maybe Ash could either protect Pikachu from some bullies, or Pikachu could even feel pity for Ash and protect him from some bullies. Anything would've been better than just 'he liked him.'"
"But that's what makes it so cuuuuute!"a voice said.
Keldeo and Eevee turned to see Kid!Ash and Pikachu tear through a bush. Kid!Ash smirked, then he turned to Pikachu, opened his arms, and shouted, "Snuggle time!"
"Eevee, grab on!" Keldeo shouted urgently. Eevee quickly grabbed onto Keldeo's tail, and he quickly grabbed his laptop in his teeth and used Hydro Pump to fly away from the area. However, they could still hear the sound of wild Pokemon shouting things like, "How adorable!", "Oh, soooo cute!", and so forth.
"WAAAAAAAH! Slow down!" Eevee shouted as she held on for dear life as the pair flew over the trees.
Eventually, the pair reached a waterfall. Keldeo used Secret Sword and spun, cutting right through the falls and into a cave behind them. Keldeo landed, and Eevee immediately let go of Keldeo's tail and began kissing the ground.
"This isn't good," Keldeo said after putting the laptop down, "Soon they'll have the entire Moor of Icirrus enslaved."
Eevee stopped kissing the ground and said, "I tried to warn you, Keldeo!"
Keldeo nodded, "I know, I know. Let's just get on with the review. Maybe we'll find a clue on how to beat them."
Keldeo quickly opened his laptop.
Chapter 2: Hanging Out
Once Ash and his mom got home, they put Pikachu on the floor, and watched him. Pikachu looked around, curious as to where he was. Ash got his Pokémon Caring book and read about Pikachu. The good news was that they were easy to take care of, but the bad news was how much electricity they could create. Luckily, Ash felt like raising Pikachu would be a good thing.
For the next several weeks, Ash and his mom helped raise Pikachu so it knew what stuff was, what was right and wrong, how to behave right, and of course take care of Pikachu. What was different however was that Pikachu acted more like a friend rather than a pet. If it was treated like a pet, it would look at Ash or his mom as if they were crazy. Pikachu wanted to be a friend, not a pet that was trained and was told 'good boy' all the time; that just sounded weird.
"I'm pretty sure no one in the Pokemon world treats Pokemon like that," Keldeo said flatly, "Also, show don't tell? What's that?"
Portal 2 Announcer: "Sarcasm Self-Test Complete"
"AHH! Who was that!?" Eevee shouted as she cowered behind Keldeo in fear.
Keldeo rolled his eyes and said, "Thanks for reminding me how annoying you can be, Eevee. I almost forgot."
"What would you like to do, Pikachu?" Ash asked looking at the yellow Pokémon. Pikachu looked around the bedroom trying to find something interesting. Eventually, they found a ball and played catch. Soon, it was time for bed and after saying goodnight, Ash got into his pajamas, and into bed with Pikachu.
*Yes, I know, it's boring, but my mind went blank. Anyways, keep reading, and please leave a review.*
"Okay, I hate it when writers do this," Keldeo said, "If you think what you wrote is boring or stupid or flawed, here's an idea: DON'T PUBLISH IT! Think it over. Edit it. Add to it. FIX IT! Don't just put it out there and apologize, that's lazy, and kind of insulting to the reader too."
Chapter 3: The Candy Jar
The next day, Ash got up with Pikachu and after Breakfast went to school. For the rest of the day, Pikachu was bored out of his mind. Luckily, Ash's mom needed some help with cleaning up the house, so Pikachu went to help her. It took them about two hours, but after that the house was sparkly clean.
"Hey, wait a minute, did Delia legally adopt Pikachu as her child or something?" Eevee said grumpily, "Why does he have to clean up?"
"He doesn't have to. He wants to. He just likes being helpful," Keldeo answered, "Sure, it's annoying that he's instantly attatched and devoted to the humans to the point he'll happily work for them. . . and another thing, aren't they're comedic possibilities for Pikachu cleaning up the house? Isn't that something we should be shown not told?"
Keldeo sighed, "Well, anyway, Ash comes home and does his homework, while Pikachu decides to raid the candy jar."
"Pika?" Pikachu said, confused as to why he didn't get any candy. What exactly was this 'candy' Ash's mom spoke of? Pikachu suddenly noticed the jar of candy that had been left on the counter. Pikachu looked around, made sure he was alone, and went over to the candy jar.
"Pika!' Pikachu exclaimed as he saw all of the candies that were inside the jar. So many candies of different shapes, colors, sizes, and flavors filled the jar from top to bottom. Pikachu had no idea which candy to start with. He then grabbed one labeled 'chocolate' and took a small bite of it.
"Chaaaa," Pikachu said, enjoying the sweet, savory, delicious flavor. Pikachu decided that at least one more couldn't hurt, so he grabbed another candy labeled 'strawberry' and ate it. Soon, Pikachu was going through almost every piece of candy he could find. It was like a candy gold mine for the electric Pokémon. As Pikachu kept eating the candy however, he suddenly leaned in too lose to the jar, and fell in.
"Pika?" Pikachu said as it got confused by it's sudden change of surroundings. Pikachu tried to get out, but instead, just got even more stuck, caused the candy jar to fall off the counter, and land upside down with Pikachu's feet and tail being the only thing from keeping the jar from breaking. Candies of all kinds fell and surrounded Pikachu as it blindingly wondered around the kitchen with no clue as to how to get out of the jar.
Grizz: "Wow! Look at this cute small box! Would it not be cute if I were to sit in it?!"
"Was that a scene from We Bare Bears?" Eevee asked.
"NO SHIP SHERLOCK!" the Intoxiquer shouted.
"AHHHHH!" Eevee screamed as she cowered behind Keldeo.
"Oops. . . sorry," the Intoxiquer said, and he flew out of the cave.
"Team Rocket's been blasting off for years, and yet somehow your Scooby Doo shtick managed to get old in only a couple of episodes!" Keldeo complained.
"Why are you so mean?" Eevee asked timidly.
Keldeo sighed and said softly, "I'm not trying to be mean. It's just that, after I let the Swords of Justice down by running away from my fight with Kyurem, I started to hate cowards in any shape or form. But I guess you're not a coward. You're just really, really, really shy. So, I'm sorry for being too hard on you."
Eevee nodded, "Okay. I understand."
"Awww! How cute!" the Intoxiquer said loudly from the other side of the waterfall.
Keldeo frowned and said, "I think you're needed on the Angry Bug Show!"
"Uhhh, I don't think he was talking about us," Eevee said nervously.
Suddenly, the cascading curtain of water exploded into steam, revealing Kid!Ash and Pikachu.
"AHHH! We're trapped!" Eevee shouted.
"Don't worry, I got an idea!" Keldeo said, and he quickly ran to the back of the cave, grabbed a Berry Juice, drank it all in one gulp, and tossed it over at Kid!Ash and Pikachu.
Kid!Ash gasped and said, "Wow! Look at this cute small bowl! Would it not be cute if Pikachu were to get it stuck on his head!"
Pikachu nodded, and with a smile, grabbed the bowl and jammed it on his head. He then tried to get it off by pushing and pulling but to no avail. Kid!Ash quickly ran in to help him.
Meanwhile, Keldeo and Eevee quietly snuck out of the cave.
"Got it!" Kid!Ash said as he pulled the bowl off of Pikachu's head, "Ta-da!"
It took a few seconds for them to realize that no one else was there.
"Sooooo CUTE!" the Intoxiquer shouted.
Except for the Intoxiquer of course.
"HUH?! Aw man! Come on, after them!"
The pair ran out of the cave, just in time to get pummeled by the waterfall.
The two quickly waded to shore, and Kid!Ash said, "Alright! No more Mister Nice Guy! Time to go all out! To Icirrus City!"
Keldeo and Eevee ran back into the woods and hid back in a different set of bushes.
"We HAVE to finish this review!" Keldeo said.
"Why? How can it help us?" Eevee asked.
"Maybe it'll show everyone how lazy it is and snap them out of it!" Keldeo replied.
"Okay, fine, I'll try anything!" Eevee admitted.
Keldeo nodded, "Okay, good. So Ash comes down and saves Pikachu and. . . ugh, is there even any real point in describing it?"
"Pikachu!" Pikachu cried out as he tried to get unstuck from the jar, but with little success. Pikachu tried and tried again, but couldn't get out. Pikachu the only one who could help him now was Ash.
Pika! Pikachu! Pika pi, Pikachu!" Pikachu called out desperately. Luckily, Ash had just finished his homework and was now washing his hands when he heard Pikachu crying for help.
"Pikachu? Pikachu?! Pikachu are you alright?" Ash called out as he went downstairs, and into the kitchen to find his friend. Ash was surprised when he saw Pikachu's feet and tail sticking out of the upside down candy jar, walking around. Ash had no idea whether to laugh or be concerned. Ash knew his mom had told them that they could have some candy, but not the whole jar!
"Pikachu? What are you doing?" Ash asked as he went to grab the candy jar, while trying not to laugh. Ash pulled and pulled to try and get Pikachu free, but it was harder than it looked. Eventually, with several more pulls, Pikachu popped out of the jar, and was free. After checking to make sure his Pokémon was okay, the two friends smiled.
"Pikachu!" Ash exclaimed as he hugged Pikachu happy that he was okay.
"Well, I guess one interesting part is how the author likes bring up extra details in a anti-'show don't tell' manner."
"Pikachu... How much candy did you eat?" Ash asked cautiously. Pikachu then shoed Ash the candy wrappers that had been left behind, Ash looked up in his book to see if eating candy was dangerous. Luckily, Pikachu was in no danger of eating any of the candy that it had ate. Pikachu decided to stop eating and after Ash ate his dessert, the two friends hung out and played. Unfortunately, Pikachu got a little bit of a sugar rush and kept running around the room like it was full of excitement and energy.
Ash's mom arrived home shortly afterwards, and Ash explained what had happened. Ash's mom wasn't happy to hear about all of the candy Pikachu had eaten, but was happy that they both were safe. After hanging out a little more, it was time for bed. Ash and Pikachu then fell asleep happy that Pikachu was no longer stuck in a candy jar.
"So we're not allowed to see Pikachu on a sugar rush? But that's funny! That would have been hilarious! Why does this story keep missing opportunities to be good?" Keldeo complained.
"It feels like a boring version of Booba," Eevee remarked.
Keldeo stared at Eevee in confusion, "That Teletubbie imitation?"
Eevee shook her head, "No, not that show! I'm talking about a short series of CGI shorts about a furry monster. It's made by Sparrow3D-."
"Eevee, I'm not really all that interested, let's focus on the review, okay?" Keldeo asked.
Chapter 4:
*This chapter was inspired by the Pokémon fan's theory of Pikachu's love for ketchup. I hope you enjoy it.*
"Okay. Does the author take advantage of any comedic possibilities?" Keldeo asked.
Pikachu jumped up onto the table as he stared at the red bottle. Pikachu had never tasted ketchup before, and he wondered if it was good or not. Pikachu looked around to make sure nobody was watching, and after seeing that nobody was around, Pikachu opened up the small lid on the top of the bottle, squeezed the bottle, and licked the red stuff inside. Suddenly, Pikachu's eyes were lit up with amazement, and there was a smile on his face.
"Pikaaaa," Pikachu said, as he continued to lick the ketchup from the bottle, and savor the delicious taste. The ketchup tasted like a long-lost friend that Pikachu had just met. Pikachu loved the taste of ketchup. Pikachu liked it so much, that he started to hug the ketchup bottle. It was his new best friend.
Suddenly, Pikachu heard footsteps. Thinking fast, Pikachu closed the lid, and went to put the ketchup bottle where it belonged. Pikachu just finished putting it away when Ash came walking into the kitchen.
"Hi Pikachu. What are you doing?" Ash asked the furry, yellow Pokémon.
"Pika pika. Pika pi pika," Pikachu replied as he tried to explain that he put the ketchup away in the kitchen. Ash understood, and for the rest of the night, the two friends played together.
That night, as Ash and Pikachu went to bed, Pikachu dreamed about tasting the ketchup, and about his new favorite food that was also his new best friend.
Slappy the Squirrel: "That was pointless."
"Knock-knock," Keldeo said.
"Who's there?" Eevee asked.
"Boring," Keldeo replied.
"Boring who?" Eevee asked.
"This story, that's who!" Keldeo exclaimed, "I mean, in Pika and Bun's One-shot Wonders by ravengal, Pikachu and Buneary have an epic ketchup fight! But this is just so pointless! It's so focused on looking cute that it doesn't give us anything interesting to take away from! Nothing happens! And when something does happen, it happens off-screen! And what really frustrates me is that I know for a fact Bluewolfbat is a really good writer! He's written some reall nice stories! Like this one right here:"
Who's Theodore?
By: Bluewolfbat
Simon and Theodore have always been brothers and best friends. But when Simon saves Theodore from getting hit by a car, Simon gets hit instead and gets Amnesia. What's worse, Simon can't remember Theodore! Now, Theodore must help Simon to get familiar with him again, and re-build their bond of friendship. Will Simon's memory ever come back, or will the old Simon be lost for good?
Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Simon S., Alvin S., Theodore S. - Chapters: 25 - Words: 19,357 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Updated: Apr 20, 2014 - Published: Mar 20, 2014 - Status: Complete - id: 10203614
"This story really is , sure, it's loaded with cute moments, I get it, that's Bluewolfbat's thing. But it's also full of detail and all kinds of emotion. Which begs the question of why this story is so phoned in? Bluewolfbat mostly writes PAW Patrol and Alvin and the Chipmunks Fanfiction, and while Pups and Marshall's Bully kinda makes me mad, I have to say that they're all pretty good. Does he just not like Pokemon as much, or am I just missing something here?"
"Well, it sounds like he has good taste in cute things, I'll tell you that," Eevee remarked.
There was suddenly the sound of an incoming Skype call alert.
"Uh-oh. I got a bad feeling about this. . ." Keldeo said as he shakily answered the call.
Kid!Ash, who's clothes were covered with a myraid of ketchup stians, appeared on the screen and said, "Hello, Keldeo! You've been very naughty to keep running away from us!"
Keldeo growled and said, "What are you up to?"
Kid!Ash chuckled and said, "Well, while you've been running around, Pikachu and I stole a whole bunch of ketchup, filled Splatoon guns with them, and used them to break into the Icirrus City television station!"
"WHAT!?" Keldeo and Eevee exclaimed.
"That's right! Our conversation is being broadcast all over Unova right now!"
Eevee gasped, "They're gonna hypnotize everyone in Unova with cuteness!"
"That's right! And it gets better!" Kid!Ash said, "When we broke into the place with our ketchup guns, we played around a bit, sliding around in ketchup and stuff. The security cameras caught it all too!"
Keldeo and Eevee gasped.
"And you're gonna play that footage all over Unova!" Keldeo gasped.
Kid!Ash blinked, and shook his head awkwardly, "Uh. . . no, why would I do that?'
Keldeo tilted his head and said, "Well, I'm sure a lot of people would like to see that, and that would be an easy way to hypnotize everyone-."
"KELDEO!" Eevee shouted.
"What? I'm just saying. And he's gonna hypnotize everyone anyway, so he might as well use a fun and entertaining way," Keldeo said.
"Hello!" Kid!Ash said loudly.
"What?" Keldeo said in annoyance.
Kid!Ash smiled and said, "Right now, Pikachu is gonna sing the I'm Cute song from the Animaniacs-"
"Nope," Keldeo said as he closed the window. "Sorry audience, we're not that desperate to rip off of the Nostalgia Critic."
Chapter 5:
It was a nice sunny day as Delia was taking down laundry from the clothesline while Ash and Pikachu ran around playing like two goofballs. Delia smiled seeing her seven-year-old son giggle and chase the little electric Pokemon; Ash and Pikachu really had become close friends. Soon, Delia had gotten all of the laundry down except for the bed sheets.
"Hey Ash! Pikachu! Could you two please come help me get the bed sheets down from the clothesline?" Delia asked kindly.
"Yes mom. Come on, Pikachu!" Ash said as he and Pikachu ran over to the clothesline to help out. Luckily, Ash had a plan to get the sheets down, and when he asked his mom if he and Pikachu could try it, Delia agreed.
"Just be careful Ash and Pikachu. You don't want the sheets to fall on top of you while you're taking them down! I'll be right back," Delia commented as she left with the basket of laundry that she already had gotten down.
Eevee groaned and face pawed. "Oh, here we go with his bed sheet fetish."
"Bed sheet fetish?" Keldeo asked incredulously.
"Yeah, there's a bed sheet scene in nearly every one of his stories," Eevee said, "Someone always has to get caught under a bed sheet or pretend to be a bed sheet ghost. and it is soooo annoying! I mean, it happens a ton of times in that Chipmunk fanfic you like so much! He's even made Chipmunk fanfics that focus on being trapped under a bed sheet as a main plot point!"
A Silly Ghost
While hanging out in their bedroom, Alvin and his brothers make a tent out of bed sheets. But after Dave comes in and tells them it's bed time, Dave leaves and Alvin and Simon take down the bed sheet tent. But Theodore is still inside the bed sheet tent, and the bed sheet falls on top of Theodore! Now he's stuck and can't get out. What will happen? Read and find out.
Keldeo raised an eyebrow and said, "Wow. . . that's. . . yeah. . .moving on!"
"Mom's right, Pikachu. We better be careful or if the sheets fall on top of us who knows what will happen!" Ash said to his Pikachu as the yellow Pokemon giggled.
"'Who knows what will happen?' What are you talking about? It's a bed sheet, not the Golden Fleece from Percy Jackson!" Keldeo said.
Eevee rolled her eyes and said, "Yeah, yeah, yeah. So the bed sheet lands on them and, yeah."
Then suddenly, the white bed sheet fell down and landed right on top of Ash and Pikachu.
"Ahhhhhhhhhh! Help! Get us out of here!" Ash cried out struggling to get out.
"Pikapi! Pi Pi Pikachu!" Pikachu exclaimed as he too tried to get out from under the bed sheet, but was unable to see anything. Just then, Delia came back outside and saw the two sheet covered buddies.
"Oh my goodness! Ash! Pikachu! My boys!" Delia cried out as she ran over to help the trainer and Pokemon out of the bed sheet. Once the bed sheet was taken off, Ash and Pikachu could finally see again. They both saw Delia and smiled.
"Mom!" Ash cried out giving his mom a hug. Pikachu did the same and she hugged them both. After a minute of hugging, they separated.
"Ash, Pikachu, what happened? How did you two get stuck under the sheet?" Delia asked concerned.
"Well, as we were taking the sheets down, Pikachu lost his footing and before he fell, he grabbed the bed sheet for support. The sheet slid off the thread though, so after I caught Pikachu and hugged him, the bed sheet fell on top of us and we got stuck. Sorry mom," Ash explained.
"Pikachu," Pikachu added, also apologizing.
"That's okay sweetie. It was an accident. How about you and Pikachu go play inside while I take the rest of the sheets down. Besides, it looks like you only had three sheets left," Delia commented looking at the clothesline.
"Thank you mom," Ash replied back before he and Pikachu both gave her another hug. After they stopped hugging, Ash and Pikachu went to go play some more. Delia watched them and sighed happily.
"Those two and their wild ideas. They try to take down some bed sheets and I find them looking like ghosts. I wonder what they will think of next," Delia told herself as she turned her attention back to the clothesline.
"That wasn't even cute! It was lame!" Keldeo exclaimed, "How could Bluewolfbat possibly top that?!"
Chapter 6:
The sun shined through the window as Ash started to wake up slowly. Ash yawned, stretched, and then looked over to the sleeping Pokemon next to him in bed. Pikachu was sleeping peaceful in bed next to Ash under the sheets. Ash smiled as he stared at his best buddy sleeping. Pikachu was the best friend that Ash could ever have, and Pikachu treated Ash the same way.
Pikachu then slowly opened his eyes and looked up at Ash before smiling. Ash smiled back. The two buddies just stared at each other, enjoying each others company.
"Good morning Pikachu," Ash said as he waited to see how Pikachu would respond.
"Pika pika. Pikachu pikapi," Pikachu replied back kindly. Ash then lied down on the bed next to Pikachu and gently pet Pikachu's fur. Pikachu smiled, and got closer to Ash enjoying the attention. Soon, Ash grabbed Pikachu in his arms and hugged him. Pikachu hugged back.
"It's so nice that we get to hang out Pikachu," Ash said as he hugged his buddy. Pikachu just smiled and kept hugging Ash. Soon, Ash pulled the covers back over him and Pikachu as they both continued to lie in bed, enjoying each others hug.
"Thank you, Pikachu. I love you buddy," Ash whispered to Pikachu.
"Pika pika. Pi pika Pikachu," Pikachu replied back happily. Ash hugged Pikachu one last time before saying:
"Thank you buddy. Now come on! Let's go have Breakfast," Ash said before he and Pikachu got out of the bed sheets, off the bed, and headed downstairs for Breakfast.
BLIIIIIIINNNGGG! sounded the alarm clock next to Ash's bed as he woke up with a jolt. Ash looked around and quickly turned his alarm clock off. The sun was just starting to shine in the sky, and Ash's clock read 7:00AM. Ash sighed as he looked over at Pikachu sleeping next to him under the sheets.
"I can't believe it was just a dream. I thought for sure Pikachu and I were awake and were about to head down to Breakfast! Oh well, I guess I'll just have to wait," Ash whispered to himself before lying down in bed again. Soon he fell asleep and after a few hours, he and Pikachu woke up and headed down to Breakfast together.
This time, everything was real, and not a dream.
The sound of an electric guitar and drums arose as Eevee sung softly.
"Ohhh-OHHHH!
You better believe!"
A gentle wind blew through Keldeo's hair as he stood with his eyes closed and shook his head gently. He looked up and sang passionately as a piano joined the guitar and drums.
"I'd review any fic on Net.
Yes, I'd review any fic on Net!
I'd review any fic on Net,
But I won't review that. . ." (Eevee: "Won't review that. . .")
"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?" Keldeo shouted, "What was the point of the chapter! It had no point! It had no purpose! It was just a poor man's version of a scene from Kevin and Buizel! It didn't even really happen! It-!"
Keldeo facehoofed and growled, then he he used Princess Cadence's breathing exercise and said calmly, "Okay, before we go any further, I thing I should clear something up so I don't look like a hypocritical jerk. There's nothing wrong with cute scenes. Like I said before, Who's Theodore is full of them. But what makes that story, as well as other stories that are mostly just self contained one shots, good is that something actually happens in the one shots. We need to learn something new or have a new experience. By that respects, the best part of the story was the first chapter. Chapters of Pikachu eating candy, eating ketchup, or just snuggling with Ash have no substance what soever. And it's not like its impossible to give substance to a fanfic like this. Check out this one:"
PokeFluff
By: Obviously Entei
A series of sometimes heart-warming, sometimes fluffy, and always SFW one-shots of Pokemon (and maybe even OCs) in various situations. Different relationships are explored. Chapter 4: Typhlosion feat. Feraligatr. (REQUESTS CLOSED AS OF MARCH 17, 2015)
"This story is mostly cute moments between Pokemon characters, but they also have substance and reveal things about the characters therein," Keldeo explained, "They also have actual jokes too! It's not just cute, it's touching, funny, and makes you think!"
"The first chapter has Cobalion showing his softer side. The second story is a rich backstory of a Gallade and Gardevoir. The third chapter is an Ash and Pikachu moment. And the fourth one is about a Feraligatr and Typhlosion, and their trainers, having a battle over a donut. And believe it or not, the third chapter is actually a bed sheet ghost scene between Pikachu and Ash, but it's played for laughs!" Keldeo exclaimed, "Plus there's a bunch of other things going on to make it interesting. Admittedly, the third chapter's the weakest one, the other three are a lot better, but the point I'm trying to make here is that trying to make the fanfiction equivalent of a cat video is just not a good idea. Which would you rather have: a rich, creamy, flavorful Pokepuff; or a ball of cotton candy that disappears in your mouth in 3 seconds? Pokefluff is the Pokepuff, A Pika Childhood is the boring cotton candy! Both are sweet, but only one of them actually has any flavor and chew to it! Who wants to eat just pure sugar!?"
Eevee looked at Keldeo with wide eyes and said, "Wow. . . you sure know how to talk."
Keldeo just nodded and said, "It's called Critic Rage. Whatever. I think it's about time we went ahead and reviewed the last chapter."
Chapter 7: Cooking with Flour
"Well, that's nice, it's the Pokemon version of that joke from that Friendship is Magic episode Baby Cakes," Keldeo said grouchily.
"Well, those scenes were funny," Eevee offered in a voice seasoned with desperation, "Maybe we can get a few laughs out of this?"
It was a nice day as Delia, Ash, and Pikachu were all in the kitchen cooking chocolate chip cookies. Ash and Pikachu were helping Delia with ingredients while Delia did the cooking. They were pretty much almost done; they just needed the flour.
"Ash, could you and Pikachu please get me the flour?" Delia asked kindly.
"Sure mom. Come on, Pikachu!" Ash said as he started to look for the flour. Pikachu joined in the search too. It took a little while, but soon, Pikachu was able to find the flour bag, and opened it. While leaning over the flour bag however, Pikachu accidentally fell in, getting covered in the white flour. Ash located the flour bag and pointed to it.
"Thank you Ash," Delia replied before grabbing the flour bag and starting to pour the flour in. From inside of the bag, Pikachu could see the flour being poured into the bowl with the other ingredients... And he was next! Pikachu quickly and quietly tried to run to the back of the bag, but that was easier said than done. Once Delia was done with the flour, she went to put it back, but noticed it was still heavy. She then set the bag down and reached inside. Just as she was about to touch the flour however, two white, pointy ears popped up out of the flour!
"Ahhhhhhhhh!" Delia shrieked as she jumped back in surprise. As Delia and Ash watched the ears move however, it didn't take long before Pikachu popped his head out of the flour and looked at Ash and his mom.
"Pikachu!" Ash exclaimed before slowly and carefully pulling his Pokemon buddy out of the flour. He then turned towards his mom.
"I'm sorry, Mom. I didn't know Pikachu was in there," Ash explained.
"Pikachu, pika pika," Pikachu added, feeling bad about the mess it made.
"It's okay sweetie. Oh Pikachu, you're all covered in flour!" Delia replied before she burst out laughing at how adorable and silly Pikachu looked covered in flour. Ash couldn't help but smile at Pikachu too; he looked as white as a ghost. After putting the mixed ingredients on a pan, she put the cookies in the oven to bake.
"Well Ash, you better give Pikachu a bath. You two can have your cookies after.
"Yes mom. Come on Pikachu," Ash said as he took Pikachu upstairs and into the bathroom. After a nice long bath, and some time to dry off, Pikachu was all clean and soft again. The two buddies then went downstairs to have their cookie before hanging out some more and eventually going to bed.
"It's. . . it's pointless," Keldeo said softly.
"It's all boring and pointless! All of it! All of it! Everyone single one of these chapters are a waste of time!" Eevee screamed.
"We couldn't even get a scene of Ash giving Pikachu a bath?!" Keldeo asked, "Even Brickboy1894 had that covered in Summer Part 1 Attempt 1! An attempt at a fanfic had better scenes than this! This entire fic is filled with mundane events with interesting events happening off screen! Show us Pikachu and Delia cleaning up! Show us Ash giving Pikachu a bath! You have to give us something in exchange for the time we're giving you! You can't just show us a bunch of cute scenes and expect us to be satisfied! And again, Bluewolfbat knows how to do this! Who's Theodore is a million times better than this, so read that instead, and don't read this! I love Bluewolfbat's work, and I will always support his good stories, but even the best have their off days. It's up to us, the audience, to point out the mistakes so that they are not repeated!"
"Keldeo, why are you wasting your breath?" Eevee asked.
"Huh?" Keldeo responded.
"EVERYONE IS HYPNOTIZED BY THEM!" Eevee exclaimed.
"Oh yeah," Keldeo said with a frown.
"Well, we reviewed the story. Any ideas?" Eevee asked.
"From the story: no," Keldeo replied.
"Ugggh!" Eevee shouted as she fell flat on her stomach and covered her eyes with her forepaws.
"But, I do have an idea on how to beat those two at their own game," Keldeo said with a smile, "I just need to make a phone call, maybe two, maybe three. . . oh, you'll see."
Kid!Ash walked through the Moor of Icirrus, looking at his tablet and grinning, with Pikachu right beside him.
"Alright! Look at these comments! Everyone is saying how cute we are! This is great! This is amazing! This is-"
Kid!Ash and Pikachu suddenly stopped at the shallow water.
"Oh, we better be careful Pikachu! We don't want to slip and fall in the water!" Kid!Ash said. His eyes became extremely big and he said slowly, "Who knows what could happen!?"
"Would you tow just get over here already!" came Keldeo's voice.
The pair looked across and saw Keldeo and Eevee standing on Keldeo's rock platform.
"Aha! There you are!" Kid!Ash shouted as he and Pikachu ran through the shallow water and over to them. The pair stopped in front of Keldeo and Eevee, and Kid!Ash said, "Everyone is going gaga over how cute we are together! And once we hypnotize you with our cuteness, we will finally have dominated the fanfiction world, and proven that cute fanfics are the best ones!"
Keldeo grinned and said, "Dead wrong."
Keldeo stood griming for a moment, then sighed and said, "That's you're cue, Eevee."
Eevee quickly opened up Keldeo's laptop and positioned it just so. She then clicked on a few things as Keldeo instructed. Keldeo checked the screen and nodded.
"Right now, I'm doing a little broadcast. A broadcast that will un-hypnotize everyone you hypnotized!" Keldeo declared.
"How are you gonna do that?" Kid!Ash challenged as Pikachu just cocked his head in silent curiosity.
Keldeo grinned again, and he said, "By fighting cuteness with cuteness."
"Huh?" Kid!Ash said.
"There's nothing wrong with cute characters, or characters that do cute things," Keldeo explained, "But a good story, or a good character needs a lot more than that. They need motivation, backstory, personality traits, defining features, hidden depths, stuff like that. And it's time that I showed everyone what I mean!"
(A/N: Okay, in all seriousness, please, PLEASE just go with it, okay? Please?)
Keldeo and Eevee jumped off of the platform, and suddenly, and out of nowhere, the three Chipettes; Brittany, Jeanette, and Eleanor; from the Nickelodeon 2015 CGI cartoon, flipped onto the scene as the laptop began to play the music from the song Paraboss from Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged.
Brittany: Come on girls, now it's time to tear walls down.
Eleanor: We hear ya Birttany, now it's time to tear walls down.
Brittany: Light up the stage cause it's time for a showdown.
Jeanette: We'll been them double and expose them as dumb clowns.
All: Now we've got to take these suckers down!
Eleanor: The Power of Rock will be sure to take them down
Brittany: Come on girls, cause it's time to tear walls down!
Kid!Ash: No! This can't be happening, how do I take them down?!
Brittany: We're gonna' beat ya! Oh Ashyboss! No doubt about it, this marks your loss!
Jeanette: As far as villains go, in Pokemon! You are so cliché! I mean, come on!
Eleanor: We are the answer books, you are the test! You're out of character, we're the Chipettes!
All: We're the Chipettes. (x8)
All: We're the Chipettes! (x9)
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Kid!Ash shouted as his body began emitting spark and spasming wildly. Two big puffs of smoke came out of Kid!Ash's ears, and he fell heavily on top of Pikachu, pinning him down.
"Ow! Hey! What's going on! No fair! NO FAIR!" shouted "Pikachu."
Eevee looked on in disbelief and said, "I can't believe that actually worked!"
Keldeo shrugged, "Why not? If the Chipmunks can tear down the Berlin Wall, I'm pretty sure this isn't that hard to believe."
Eevee stared at Keldeo and said, "That was just a joke right?"
Keldeo looked back at Eevee as if it were obvious and said, "Uh, no. The Chipmunks really did tear down the Berlin Wall. Episode 72A of Season 6 of the 1988 series. Entitled The Wall."
Eevee put a forepaw to her forehead and said woozily, "I'm getting dizzy. . ."
Eevee walked towards the pinned down "Pikachu" and said, "And now it's time to reveal who's really behind all this madness!"
Keldeo pit "Pikachu's" ears and pulled, tearing off the top part of the costume.
"VICTINI?"everyone shouted.
"Just as I suspected!" Keldeo said confidently.
"What?" Victini exclaimed.
Keldeo smiled and said, "The first clue was how you never spoke when you were chasing us. The second was when Kid!Ash said that you were gonna sing. The real Pikachu can't speak human language, but youare one of the only Pikachu sized Pokemon who can, along with Zorua and Shaymin. But, you are the only one with the right motive. You were upset at me for the the jokes I made about you in my Pokken Tournament editorial. Plus, the whole cuteness motive fits you. You're so cute that Joshscorcher put you as number one in his Top Ten Favorite Pokemon video."
Eevee groaned, "Ugggh! That was two years ago, yet he goes on and on bragging about it at Kawaii Club Meetings!"
Keldeo nodded, "Yeah. So it makes sense how Victini would use his cuteness to his advantage in order to humiliate me and ruin the standards of fanfiction I value so highly."
Victini struggled underneath Kid!Ash and said, "Grrr. And I would've gotten away with it too if it weren't for those meddling Chipettes, AND WILL YOU GUYS GET OFF OF ME!"
A hatch opened on Kid!Ash, and Alvin and the Chipmunks jumped out.
"Whaaaaat?" Eleanor said as Brittany and Jeanette just looked on in disbelief.
Eevee looked ta Keldeo and said, "Okay, there's no way you could've expected that?"
"Uh, of course I expected that. I hired them," Keldeo replied.
"YOU hired them?! I hired them!" Victini shouted as he shifted the robotic suit and stretched out his back.
"Victini, I knew you were coming after me ever since my Sacrifice review. I've been watching the Munkcast recently, and I figured, 'why not give Victini an interesting head start.' It's kinda disappointing to see you shove them in a metal suit like a Five Nights at Freddy's animatronic. . ." Keldeo blinked, then chuckled, "Heh. Very nice metaphor for this fanfic that hides all the possibly interesting parts."
"So you sent them to me?" Victini gasped in shock, "But I thought they came to help me because they felt sorry for me."
"Oh, we feel sorry for you, trust me!" Alvin remarked.
Victini sniffed and turned away sadly.
"Let me handle this," Keldeo said to the group at large. He then walked over to Victini and said, "I'm sorry."
Victini turned and looked at Keldeo with wide eyes.
Keldeo nodded and said, "I really am. I'm sorry for making fun of you like I did. Just because I found you a bit annoying in Gates to Infinity doesn't give me an excuse to be rude. You didn't hurt anyone or ruin things or are irresponsible like those Legendary Beasts. I actually kind of admire your actions at the Sword of the Vale. You're a strong noble Pokemon with a free spirit. I like that in a Legendary." Keldeo held out his forehoof to Victini and said, "So, how about we be friends and work together. I could use a cool, cute Pokemon working on Keldeo the Critic on the regular. What do you say, Hero of the Vale?"
Victini's eyes widened, then he smiled and shook Keldeo's hoof enthusiastically. "Apology accepted, Keldeo! This show's gonna be better than ever with me on board!"
Alvin nodded and said, "Well, I think our work her is done."
Simon adjusted his glasses and said, "Well, I believe we have a Munkcast Christmas Special to make."
"Oh, yeah! Let's go!" Theodore said.
The Chipmunks picked up the robot suit and carried it off. The Chipettes followed close behind, with Brittany calling out, "Wait, so that was the top secret project you boys had been working on?"
Eevee took off in hot pursuit of them as well, calling out, "WAIT! Can I have your autographs! And are you interested in joining the Kawaii Club!?"
Keldeo and Victini watched them all go, then Keldeo sighed in contentment and said, "Well, the Chipettes music, mixed with my Critician powers, has un-hypnotized everyone. Eevee hopefully won't be so shy anymore. And you-."
"Ohmigosh, I almost forgot! The Legendary Beasts-," Victini exclaimed.
"They're pushovers. I can handle them. But if things get too bad I can call the other Swords of Justice," Keldeo replied casually.
Just then, the other Swords of Justice walked in, thankfully un-hypnotized. Vrizion and Terrakion were silent and serious, and Cobalion walked over to Keldeo and said sternly, "Never speak of what happened. Ever."
Keldeo just nodded silently.
Cobalion nodded back, and the three elder Swords of Justice walked away.
Victini chuckled and leaned on Keldeo's side. "Well, at least nothing else could possibly happen today!"
Suddenly, a green warp pipe grew out of the ground, and out jumped a Lucario wearing a red collar and a Santa hat.
Santa Paws! Santa Paws! We all love Santa Paws!
"Hey, it's Santa Paws!" Keldeo said happily.
"Okay, now I've seen everything," Victini remarked.
Santa Paws panted for a moment, and said, "I've just been Bowser's Castle, a volcano, an under water cave, and a pipe maze. . . " Santa Paw caught his breath and smiled as he said, ". . .to give you your Christmas fanfics!"
Santa Paws then handed Keldeo three book sized packages wrapped in Christmas gift wrap.
"Oh, wow! Thank you so much, Santa Paws!" Keldeo said as he took the packages.
"Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho! Have a Merry Christmas you two!" Santa Paws laughed a he walked away merrily.
"Aww, how come I didn't get anything?" Victini complained.
"Just wait until Christmas, I'm sure you'll get something," Keldeo said, "Anyway, I hope everyone is excite about Christmas, because I sure am! See you next time for a Pokemon Christmas fanfic review!"
Keldeo raised a forehoof and waved cheerily, saying, "I'm Keldeo the Critic, and I review it so you don't have to."
"Me too!" Victini cheered.
The End
Credits
Nostalgia Critic: Turbo: A Power Rangers Movie
Nostalgia Critic: Hocus Pocus
JonTron: Titenic
Alvinnn! and the Chipmunks (2015)
The Chipmunks (1988)
The Munkcast by Munk Media
Paraboss by LittleKuriboh/CardGamesFTW
Percy Jackson and the Olympians
We Bare Bears
The Animaniacs
Portal 2
Scooby Doo
Top Ten Favorite Pokemon by Joshscorcher
Summer Part 1 Attempt 1 by BrickBoy1894
An Icy Cold Christmas by BrickBoy1894
Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates to Infinity
Special Thanks
Mandopony
Bulbapedia
The Kawaii Club (Keep It Secret UK)
Obviously Entei