Innocent People's Lives
Chapter Twenty-one
He told her the passcode, which allowed them into the garage. He directed her to a marked spot where she parked the stolen car. He leaned on her heavily as they moved across the lot to an elevator. It was slow going as the adrenaline that originally fueled them both wore off.
"You said this was before you were CIA. Wouldn't they know who you were?"
"They would if the Ben Danvers they recruited in college was the real me," he said with a grin, pressing the button for the Penthouse. "But he wasn't."
"Who was?'
"It's a long story, but I reinvented myself before college. I separated myself from who I was and who I would be."
Lisa frowned as the doors opened. He entered a code just outside the elevator and a wall slid open.
They were inside a luxurious apartment. How could this be a safe place? How could he afford any of this? Who was he? Every time she thought she knew who Jackson Rippner really was, he threw her another curveball. Working for Keefe. But really working for the CIA to stop Keefe. Now this?
"My name really is Ben," he said softly as she helped him to a chair. "It's my last name that's a bit more complicated."
"We need to fix your leg."
"There's a kit down the hall, second door on the left. Under the sink."
She nodded, hurrying down the wide hallway. The apartment had lots of windows, lots of natural light. It didn't seem like somewhere that Jackson would live. Hell, the chair he was bleeding in probably cost two grand.
She found the kit with ease. The bathroom was spotless. Either he had a really good maid or no one ever used the room. But there also wasn't a speck of dust in sight.
Lisa hurried back to him and unlatched the massive box. It was full to the brim of cleaning fluids, bandages, gauze, and many other things she didn't recognize at first glance, including syringes. Jackson grabbed a few items and tossed them at her.
"It's already sterile. Put on a pair of gloves, yeah, those," he directed, while using scissors to widen the hole in his pants. He clipped the fabric away from the wound with minimal hissing.
"I don't know what to do."
"I can talk you through it. Don't worry."
She took a deep breath and opened the cleanser first. She cleaned the edges of the bullet wound under his direction, clearing the field of vision from blood and also helping sterilize his leg.
"That's good. Now, you need to find the bullet so you can close it up."
She looked up at him, shaking her head. "I can't…"
"You can, Leese."
"What if I mess it up? You could die!"
"I won't. You can do this. Just listen to me."
She nodded, still uncertain. "Okay."
"Deep breathes, in and out. Good. Now, it's not very deep, you'll have to feel for it. You're not going to hurt me, I promise. Fingers first."
She pushed a gloved finger into the wound, flinching at the feel. He tensed.
"Almost, more to the left. Feel it?"
"Yeah, I think so."
"Okay, now, grab the forceps. You want to clamp down on the bullet and pull it out."
She followed his directions, getting a tight grip on the metallic object lodged in his thigh. She still wasn't sure why the bullet hadn't torn through his leg, but she guessed it was good that it hadn't.
"Pull, Leese."
She did and he dug his fingers into the chair, trying to hold still. He was paler now, whether it was from pain or blood loss, she didn't know.
"Okay, it's out… it's out… holy shit…" she muttered, staring at the bullet in her hand now.
"Clean the wound again… yeah, fuck that burns, don't stop…"
She tossed the blood-streaked pad to the floor beside the other debris from cleaning. "Now what?"
"You have to stitch it up. Thread, needle. I'm going to do my best to stay still. Don't worry – it doesn't have to be pretty."
"I don't—"
"You just dug a bullet out. I think you can handle stitches."
She changed to clean pair of gloves and threaded the needle. "This is so messed up."
"You can do it."
She began to push the needle through his skin, pulling along the black thread behind it. Her stitches were sloppy, but she was closing the gap between the skin, even as he hissed and jerked. "Earlier, you said you weren't Ben Danvers…"
He sucked in a breath, then answered, "Yeah, he's me, but I wasn't always Ben Danvers."
"So who are you then?"
"My family...my mother, really, is obscenely wealthy. I wanted to be my own person. So I changed my identity. Kept my first name and adopted the last name of my childhood nanny. My college took the money to look the other way. I got a new social security number, new birth certificate - everything I needed to look legitimate. That's who the CIA approached, not the real me."
Lisa nodded, still skeptical, as she continued with the stitches. "And the old you?"
"As far as the rest of the world knows, Benjamin T. Wallace the Third died in a plane crash at the age of twenty-two. This place belongs to his mother. Then again, mother has about thirty different places around the world. No one keeps track of which ones she stays at."
"But your mother—"
"She knows I'm alive, Leese. I'm not a monster. But she also knows Ben Wallace can't exist. That he's dead. She understands that her son is dead and that when he can, Ben Danvers visits."
She tied off the stitches and snipped the thread short.
"So who are you right now?"
"I don't know," he said softly. "Just Ben, I guess."
"I still can't think of you as Ben."
"Then you can keep calling me Jack."
Lisa nodded. "Okay, Jack. Ready for me to do your shoulder?"
He pulled his shirt over his head in answer. She repeated the process of cleaning the mark first with the disinfectant, then started to stitch the wound closed. There was less hesitation now.
"Why the CIA? Why work at all?" she asked.
"What else was I going to do? I watched good friends destroy themselves through drug use. Another lost control of his car and killed five people. My own mother was more concerned with wooing husband number five than her son. It was toxic."
"So you and your mom… you're not close?"
"Not anymore. She took it personally when I walked away. She's still in shock that money wasn't enough. She's disappointed."
"Even though you're one of the good guys?"
"I work for the government. I might as well be a drug dealer in her eyes," he admitted. "I think she'd prefer that, actually."
"That's terrible."
"Not as bad as your stitches. I have never seen anything so crooked in my life."
"Hey!" she protested as she tied off the other wound. "I can just as easily cut these out…"
"I'm teasing you, Leese." He turned his head to kiss her. "Relax."
She closed her eyes. "What are we going to do, Jack? Today was a disaster."
"We'll figure something out. Don't worry."
"Your entire team… they turned on you. We killed them…"
He put his good hand on her shoulder. "What happened today was in no way your fault. It was the only way. He started this, not us. It was us or them. Don't ever doubt that."
"You almost died because of me."
"But I'm still here. You could've left me there."
"You know I couldn't," she whispered, turning her head away from him. "You know I can't…"
He cupped her cheek, turning her back to face him. "Lisa, Leese… it's okay to be angry. To be upset. It's human."
"It was more than that. I'm just angry. At everyone. Keefe. You. Myself."
"Don't be. You didn't do this. You're a victim."
She looked at him, eye-to-eye. "You got shot protecting me. I should be dead."
"But you're not and I'm fine. We are going to fix this. We are going to stop Keefe and my boss."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because I know you. And you don't give up without a fight. Now, let's take it easy and rest. We'll talk about it in the morning. Deal?"
"Deal."
Author's Notes:
I'm so dedicated to this story, you guys, I was writing parts of this chapter on my smartphone before a meeting instead of writing memos.
Disclaimer – my medical knowledge exists solely in CPR and First Aid training. I don't work in the field. Also I don't recommend attempting surgery on yourself. Or digging out bullets (fun fact, you don't necessarily need to remove a bullet – the heat of the gun firing sterilizes it). But you, know, fiction. I can say that stitches fucking hurt even with a local anesthetic and are a bitch to clean. But I'm also a wimp when it comes to needles.
Thanks again to all the reviewers (both guests and registered!)! You guys rock.
Even the simple reviews like "please update soon" are great. I'm really easy to please. Really. Even just a smiley face goes a long way. It's never too late to review!
Guest (chap 16) - Yay, so glad you like it! I hope the name reveal was worth it. Thanks for reviewing!
Maxwell02 (chap 2) – Thanks! It's good to be back. So glad you're enjoying it! Thanks again!
Guest (chap 3) – Yup, Keefe is kinda the big bad. I hope it lives up to what you thought… one of my original plot twists when I was planning this story was having Lisa married to Keefe and then having him try to kill her. I figured that was a bit extreme, so I landed somewhere in the middle. Thanks again!
guest (chap 3) – Thank you! First time reviews make me a little teary-eyed. Thanks so much!
Jk (chap 2) – Thanks.
Guest (chap 2) – Thank you so much! Enjoy!
Just meee (chap 1) – Thanks!