Nick and Heath rode out early one morning. The air was crisp and the ground was misty but the day promised to be warm and sunny.
"How's Sarah?" Nick asked.
Heath gave his brother a quick glance then returned his gaze to the road ahead. "My wife is well, Nick. Thanks for asking."
"No, I mean, how's she doing with Leah being away?"
"Well, we miss her and we hope she's having a really good time and we look forward to having her back home soon." When Nick didn't give an immediate response, he said, "Why do you ask?"
"Em's acting all broody about it."
"Broody? You mean she's wantin' to have another baby?"
Nick sputtered; the thought of another baby had not occurred to him and it threw his thoughts into a spin. He always sounded irritated when he got flustered like that. "No! Well, what I mean is, well, she's been moping, well, kinda, but I know her - and I think it's cause she wants, well, like she's, uh – "
"Lonely?"
Nick stopped his horse, took off his hat and raked his fingers through his hair. Looking down into his hat, he said, "Yeah, maybe that's it" He looked up at Heath who had stopped, too, and said, "Didn't think she'd grieve Mother this much."
"The way I figure it, Nick, she lost more than just Mother. She got Audra and lost her, too, along with a daughter and a couple of sons who are almost men and getting ready to fly the coop. So she's more alone in that house than she's ever been." Nick hadn't thought of it like that, not all of it together anyway. It made sense.
They continued to ride on in silence until Heath said, "So, Nick, you think you're gonna have another kid?" He could barely keep a straight face.
"You mention that one more time and I'm gonna give you the what-for," Nick said, holding up a gloved fist. Heath just smiled and continued riding. Nick, just to be certain, tried to do some calculations in his head regarding the past several weeks. He wasn't able to figure anything out.
That night, after dinner, after Daniel and Julia had gone to bed, and Tom and Will were shooting pool in the billiards room, Nick went into the parlor where Emily was playing Liszt's "Lieberstraum" on the piano. He poured a drink and leaned back on the sofa, stretched out his legs, closed his eyes, and listened to all the sounds of the house.
When she was finished, Emily folded her hands in her lap and sat up ramrod straight. It was a long ingrained habit, enforced by a piano teacher years ago, and Nick liked to tease her about it, though he found it endearing.
"Nick? You okay?"
"Hmm? Yeah. Play something else." He closed his eyes again and listened.
When she finished the second piece, she walked over to the sofa and sat close to him.
"That was nice, what was it?" he asked, still leaning back, eyes still closed.
"Tchaikovsky's 'Lullaby'"
He sat up and looked at her. "Em, please tell me you're not . . ."
"Not what?" She was genuinely puzzled for a moment until she made the connection. "Oh, dear Lord, no!" She laughed. "Why would you think that?"
"You been acting kinda, well, sad, broody."
"Broody?"
"Thought maybe you were thinking of having another."
She leaned her head against his shoulder. "I am sad but I don't think another child is the answer to that." She sat back up and looked him in the eye. "And anyway, Nick Barkley, your participation in such an endeavor is as important after the fact as it is before. I would never intentionally . . . not without your explicit consent on the matter."
That was all the reassurance he needed from her. She could be many things: Thoughtful, hard working, funny, shy, stubborn, clever, pushy, capricious sometimes, underhanded for a good cause, maybe, but never outright deceitful. He smiled at her and caressed her cheek with the back of his hand before she settled her head back against his shoulder.
"I think five is quite enough, thank you," she said.
"Well, six if you count Grace," he said.
"Five and a half, then, 'cause we have to share her with her parents." They sat still and silent a moment, then, "Nick? I really miss her a lot."
"Carrie?" Nick nodded.
"Carrie, too. But Carrie's coming back."
A few days later, Nick had the buggy hitched and ready and the boys were on their horses, Daniel on a pony, waiting, while Nick went inside to find Emily and Julia. They were finally coming down the stairs and ready to leave for the party the Marvins were throwing for their daughter's Sweet Sixteen.
"I was kinda hoping you'd wear something other than black today," Nick said to Emily under his breath as he held the front door open for his wife and small daughter.
Emily kind of wished she was wearing something other than black, too, but this was the custom for mourning a parent as indicated by Cassell's Household Guide.
It made Emily's heart glad to see the great crowd of people gathered on the expanse of the Marvin's lawn, everyone in a celebratory mood. A bright yellow tent was erected to provide extra shade and refreshments and the children were already busy and boisterous with various games, darting about and weaving through the crowd. There was a lovely sound of people talking and children yelling and laughing. Emily took in the sight of people young and old and the variety of colors offered by the tent, the green grass, the blue sky, and the rainbow of the girls' bright dresses. She thought she'd been wise to dress Julia in pink so she could see her should she get lost in the crowd, but Julia's was not the only pink dress. Emily smiled.
Will and Nancy Marvin greeted them warmly. They might have greeted Julia, too, but she had already spotted a group of small children gathered around a shallow pool, small boats and a couple of ducklings floating on it. She tugged at her mother's skirt. Emily smiled apologetically at Nancy and followed her daughter over to the pool. She was glad when Nancy walked with her and made the effort to engage Emily in happy conversation.
Emily spotted Sarah in her black dress among the blues and greens and yellows. Sarah was as uncomfortable with idle chat as Emily and Emily might have crossed over the lawn to join her then but needed to keep close to Julia who was much more like her father at a social gathering of peers: joining the existing banter with ease and letting her opinions be known. Emily needed to referee.
The sisters-in-law were together soon enough and, through an unspoken understanding borne of years of friendship, both women made sure to speak with the people nearby, neither of them straying too far out of their own orbit.
Tom and Will were far away from the center of activity, part of a big crowd of young men and women, laughing and flirting. Grace seemed to be having a good time, too, pitching horseshoes. She wore a pale blue dress that made her white blonde hair appear almost translucent in the afternoon sunshine. Julia had found her way over to her father when she tired of ducks and water and was now listening intently to the men's conversation from her perch on her Uncle Heath's shoulders. Emily could only catch occasional glimpses of Daniel who was chasing around the periphery of the party with a small gang of other young boys.
Nancy Marvin had thoughtfully provided an abundance of large cloth napkins for the barbeque and Julia was draped in two while she ate the chicken and the roasted corn, sitting on a bench next to Grace. Daniel hardly ate and was back and forth from the table with lightning speed. He would return for cake, however.
As the meal wound down, Will Marvin spoke to the gathering, thanked them for coming to celebrate Alice Ann's birthday and spoke lovingly about his pretty daughter. Then he announced her engagement to be married. Emily quickly looked over at Nick who cheered and clapped along with everyone else.
After the meal, Grace brought Julia to a small group of children gathered under some large oaks trees not far from the house. Two of the trees had swings attached to their limbs. They had been gone awhile when Emily heard the unmistakable sound of her own child's scream and walked briskly over to the grove to investigate. There she found Grace sitting on her haunches, trying to reason with a most unreasonable Julia, and holding her around her waist to keep her from charging at the focus of her anger, her arch nemesis: one Joseph Curtis, age five. Grace was shrieking and crying. Joseph was crying, as well, and Minerva Curtis was trying to get him to tell her what happened. The two mothers exchanged looks of exasperation as Emily decided her small child was not in any state to explain anything.
After offering a brief apology to Joseph's mother, Emily took Julia's hand and tried to lead her away but Julia was having none of it and planted her bottom on the grass, crying even louder. "All right, then," Emily said, picked up the squirming child, and carried her over to a table out of Joseph's line of sight and sat down holding Julia on her lap. She held her little one tight and rocked her until she calmed down. Some time later, Nick came over, deciding it was time to leave for home. A quick glance at Julia and Nick looked at Emily who whispered, "Later."
After offering thanks to Will and Nancy for a lovely afternoon, Nick and Emily prepared to leave. Tom and Will were off to town for a dance but instructed first to fetch their little brother. Julia was tired to the point of almost sleep and was being lifted into the buggy when Daniel approached with another young boy Emily had never seen before.
"Momma, this is Tommy. Can he come over next week and see the ranch?"
"Tommy is welcome anytime but we'll need to speak with his mother and father about it," she said.
Tommy was a cute little guy, curly hair and green eyes, freckles on his nose.
"Who are your folks, Tommy?" Nick asked.
Daniel spoke for his friend. "Tommy's mother died and his father isn't here. He just moved here with his aunt and uncle." Tommy dug his toe into the dirt, keeping his head down. He seemed to be blushing.
"Hello!" A couple approached and the man extended his hand to shake Nick's. "I'm Bob Kitchner, this is my wife, Mary. Tommy is our nephew; he lives with us. We're new to the area. Moved up from Merced last month." The two men shook hands and introductions were made.
"So you're Nick Barkley, I've heard a lot about you," Mr. Kitchner said. They were certainly warm and friendly people but Emily saw a quizzical look on Mary's face.
"Tommy is welcome to come to the ranch anytime," Emily said to Mary. "As are you. Do please feel welcome to visit us. Tommy and Daniel seem to have become fast friends."
Plans were made for such a visit while Nick talked with Mr. Kitchner. Mary stepped closer to Emily and explained.
"Tommy is my late sister's son. He lives with his father but spends his summers with our family," Mary nodded toward two older girls who had been with Tom and Will's group. "My sister's husband has a ranch south of Merced and Tommy's too young to ride along with his father and brothers for the cattle drive."
There weren't many cattle ranchers the Barkleys didn't know so Emily asked who Mary's former brother-in-law might be.
"Carl Wheeler."