Disclaimer - I own nothing you recognise.
Written for auction prompt - Malevolence
Word Count - 243
Azkaban (With Cake)
"That's a level of malevolence I've never seen before," Harry commented, tilting his head slightly as he stared at the pictures laid out on his desk. "Like… Bellatrix wouldn't have pulled this kinda shit, and she was ten bags of batshit."
Kingsley snorted, but conceded the point.
"The question is, what do we do with her. We've got her on kidnapping charges, but… this needs another level of punishment I feel."
Harry nodded seriously. "I don't like the bloke, but Merlin. I wouldn't have wished this on Voldemort. Actually…"
"Harry, stick to the subject."
Snorting, Harry replied, "You telling me that the mental picture isn't funny?"
"I'm not picturing it. I've got enough scars from the war, don't need to add a mental one to complete the set. Anyway Auror Potter, what are we going to do about this?"
"I kinda wanna buy her a cake. But, well, nobody sane would do this. So, Mungo's?"
"Azkaban for kidnapping," Kingsley countered.
Harry gestured to the pictures on the desk. "Kingsley, mate, she locked him in her basement and dressed him in a bright pink onesie. Dolores Umbridge is a menace to society but… well. That's kinda brilliant."
Sighing, Kingsley shook his head. "Azkaban, Harry."
"Okay. Azkaban. With cake."
"I'm going to go and check on Cornelius. They're keeping him overnight at the hospital to make sure he's okay. I've promised that these pictures will not find their way into the press. Capisce?"
"Spoil sport."