Chapter 30 –– What The Hell Happened?
AN: I'm truly sorry that this update is soooo late. I've been sick for the past few weeks and still trying to recover. This update will be shorter than usual so I will post another chapter on Tuesday to make up for it. I am very grateful for Tea4e, Shellibug, Zubes, pistonsfan75, Cassie Sharpie, JJ288, mar071, Buttercupbadass, pumpkinking5, Mspriss523, jroseley, Aqua Rules, Browniangel, LACR, Nai1987, J, Lhaine07, BDizzy, and guests. Thank you for taking the time to write and leave a review. It's always a pleasure to read your comments and reactions. This chapter contains Lily, Prim and Jimmy's POVs and is rated R.
All major characters belongs to Suzanne Collins.
Lily Everdeen POV ––
Two days before the Reaping Ceremony
"You're going to do what?" I almost screamed. It was a good thing that the girls were not home yet. Garrett and I barely argued but this…this announcement, stunned me. He had the audacity to look guilty and ashamed as he sighed and took a deep breath. He'd better explain himself for endangering Katniss and Peeta's life with his ludicrous and danger idea.
"Haymitch and I…are going to approach both Peeta and Katniss to…help MockingJay by asking them to join the rebellion," he admitted. My hands clenched at my sides. I was furious…no I beyond furious. I was enraged. When Garrett joined the revolution, I was hesitant and afraid because of the repercussions and consequences but he promised me he would do everything in his power to protect our family…our girls.
"How could you ask that of them?" I said as I gritted my teeth to control my fury. "You promised me that you would protect our girls and yet you asked Katniss to…to…place her life in danger?"
"Please let me explain––" he begged his eyes pleading as he reached out to me. I flinched and stepped back.
"What is there to explain? You and Haymitch are out of your mind if you I'm going to agree to this selfish idea to place two teens in a war."
"Lily––"
"Don't Lily me Garrett," I sobbed as my anger turned to fear, disappointment and anxiety. "I cannot believe it. I cannot believe you would stoop so low." I felt as though someone stabbed me in the chest. I envisioned images of my girls' dead, dying for a cause I believed and supported but not realized the desperation that my husband and close friend would do to achieve their goal.
"Lily, I'm sorry," he started. "Just please let me explain why." I nodded my head. Garrett was a kind, gentle man. It took a lot to get him angry but once angered, he exploded with great intensity that it would take hours for him to calm down. Katniss took after my temperament. I was quick to anger. "As you know, a fake MockingJay attempted to kidnap Peeta." I nodded my head trying to understand why he needed to explain that. I knew Jay he would never resort to such tactics.
"Haymitch and I realized that District 13's new leader, President Alma Coin was behind it. Since…Jay wears a mask anyone could pretend to be him."
"That doesn't explain why you want to recruit Peeta and our daughter," I said losing patience. That was another thing Katniss inherited from me––impatience and focus.
"As I was saying, Peeta's attempted kidnapping made me realize that in order to protect him and Katniss, we need to bring them into the cause. They need to know…who the real MockingJay is."
"Oh my god, Garrett, you know going to expose––"
"We need to, Lily," Garrett interjected. "They're not safe. Not from Coin or Snow. I'm at wits end trying to figure out how to keep them safe and protect them."
"Why can't you and Haymitch just try to find a way to keep them safe without recruiting them?" I asked. As a mother, I saw no advantage. But Garrett saw another. I couldn't reconcile with the idea of recruiting two teenagers to a cause they were unprepared for. Katniss had barely passed her reaping age and Peeta had one more year. Their relationship was blooming into something I had never imagined.
"We feel that…if we recruit them they'll have a fighting chance to survive," he explained. "I don't want to blindside them if they find out accidentally who the Mocking Jay is."
"But to recruit them? Why?"
"If we recruit them, they'll be trained to protect themselves. I have no doubt that Katniss can but Peeta…"
"You don't give him much credit," I scoffed. I have been reluctant or disagreed with Katniss' choice for a boyfriend, but I never once doubted Peeta's ability to protect her. He had already proven that when he confronted Ivan. I knew in my heart that Peeta would kill to protect those he loved and I knew he loved Katniss. I was against the match at first.
Not after Garrett explained that six year old Peeta had a crush on our daughter, I watched him––the looks, gazes and longing in his eyes. The crush never wavered but grew stronger as the years went by. I didn't want Katniss to experience the pain, guilt and feeling of abandonment for loving and marrying a man who you're family didn't approve of. That was why I encouraged Gale to court Katniss, but she didn't want anything to do with him.
"I have no qualms for Peeta being Katniss' beau, but he's…he has a gentle and loving heart. He's not a fighter, Lily," he stated. "I'm afraid that his gentle nature will get him killed."
"That's where I disagree with you," I said. "Peeta is a fighter. He fought to stay alive when Cray whipped him, he remained strong when Snow drugged him and who knows what else he experienced when Peeta was in the Capitol."
"I'm not saying he's a coward. I know he's strong and courageous, but it's different when you have to pick up a gun and shoot a man or woman. To take a life."
"Then why recruit him if you feel that way?" I was confused. Why have Peeta join the rebellion if Garrett had doubts of his fighting instincts and ability? It made no sense.
"I…we need to prepare him. Train him get him seasoned with a gun," he started. "And…"
"And?"
"The districts look up to Peeta…and Katniss for that matter," he continued. "They're…they have become the symbol of hope…a future without Snow and the Capitol."
"That's not right, Garrett," I sobbed. "They're still kids." I was appalled when Garrett taught our eldest to hunt, but had it not been for Katniss, I ashamedly admit that our family would have starved without her help.
"You know, Lily," Garrett spoke. "Both Peeta and Katniss grew up faster then most kids we know." I nodded my head. "They've experienced more than the kids their age. I'm…I'm scared for them. That is why I…we need them. I don't want Snow or Coin to get their clutches on them. They need to be protected and the only solution that Haymitch and I can come with…is to join us."
"I understand, but the mother in me" I sighed. "They're still babies in my eyes. And what about James, did he agree to this? I can't believe that he'd agree to this…insanity."
"He wasn't at first… but he too realized that in order to keep Peeta safe we have to get him ready. He, amongst all of us needs to be prepared. And Katniss…she loves that boy. I can see it in her eyes. She won't do anything without him."
"That's why you want to recruit the both of them," I said to myself. "They need each other."
"They've become…The Star Crossed Lovers of District 12," Garrett announced. I gasped.
"What?"
"That's who they've become. Peeta and Katniss…people admire them," he explained. "People right now need hope and that's how they are being perceived. Snow sees them as a threat and Coin as a symbol to take advantage and abuse. I'm trying to keep them safe, Lily. And the only way is to join us…fight with us."
"Do you really expect them to fight in a battle?" I gasped in horror.
"No," he denied. "Lily, I would never expect them to literally fight. What I'm asking them is to stand beside MockingJay so that people can see whose side they are on. But, I want to train them incase…so they can protect themselves. It's not right to ask them to fight then leave them vulnerable that they're incapable of defending themselves."
I hated it but I knew Garrett was right. I just didn't like the idea that both Peeta and Katniss had to join the rebellion to protect them. My heart ached every time Katniss came home from school and her date with Peeta. She had a big smile on her face––something she hadn't done in a long time. He made her happy and I wouldn't be surprised that she had fallen for him. Peeta was easy to love; he was sweet and gentle but strong and protective just like his father. I could have easily had a good life with James Mellark, but I fell for Garrett. I followed my heart and so did Katniss. But the reality is that in order for her to have a future free from Snow and his games, we needed to fight in a war that was stacked against us. So with a heavy heart I agreed.
A day later, I felt disjointed, confused and scared. All night I tossed and turned thinking about the reaping ceremony which affected Prim and Katniss' decision. I feared for both of my girls' safety and welfare. I carefully slipped out of bed and crept to my daughter's bedroom. A sliver of moonlight beamed into their room. It provided enough light for me to gaze upon my two sleeping daughters. Oddly enough, it was Prim who had a frown on her brow while Katniss slept easily. It was usually the other way around as Katniss bear the weight and responsibility of providing for our family. I have never forgiven myself for…abandoning them when they needed me. I loved Garrett so much that I lost myself in fear of losing him that I neglected my daughters. I lost precious time with them time I couldn't get back.
I gazed down on my sleeping daughters. Both were reflections of Garrett and me. Prim have inherited my physical looks but she was her father's daughter as they were both patient and soft spoken, gently by nature and temperament. As for Katniss she inherited Garrett's dark hair and stormy eyes but their similarities ended with her quick temper and moody temperament. She was so much like me. I was truly blessed with a wonderful husband and loving daughters. I couldn't have asked for more.
During breakfast with the Mellarks, I watched Prim and Katniss who barely ate their meal had it not been Peeta to encourage them. I didn't know what he said to Katniss but she blushed and nodded her head her eyes filled with love and trust. I knew at that moment that she would follow him to death had he asked her to. In just a few days, their relationship blossomed faster than I anticipated. I ignored the red marks on Katniss' neck when she returned from her dates with Peeta. I had to be blind not to see them. I smiled as I remembered my first blush of love and desire for Garrett so who was I to lecture her. For the first time in years, Katniss was…happy and to my surprise in love. I never thought it happened. With Gale, I was certain that their relationship had Katniss succumbed to the idea, would have been based on companionship for her and love from Gale. It would not have been a love match on both their parts but of survival. Peeta changed her as she opened her heart for him.
As for Prim she clung to her older sister her face pinched with worry and fear. Her face was paler than usual. I wanted to comfort her but she sought Katniss' arms to hold her as she clung to Peeta in return. Garrett was right they all grew so fast and I had missed those moments when they needed me. I turned my head and looked at my husband and James. I could see the burden they carried on their shoulders waiting for our children to decide their fate.
James looked weathered and drawn, his physicality changed from weeks of worry, heartache and grief. His shoulders usually wide and broad were sagged as he lost weight. He experienced so much grief and pain in such a short amount of time.
"Look at them," I said to Garrett as I watched Katniss, Peeta and Prim walking ahead of us. Katniss hung onto Peeta her hand clasped tight with his. "Looking at them breaks my heart. What if we lose Prim? What if Katniss loses Peeta?"
I felt a pressure in my hand as Garrett squeezed his fingers. "Don't let them hear you."
Silently Haymitch joined us as we walked next to James. Delly and Rye joined us soon after. I placed a hand over my mouth as Tyler reached his hand out to Peeta looking for his uncle. "Hey, Tyler," James spoke soft and low as he cradled his grandson in his arms. "Your Uncle Peeta is busy right now. He'll come and get you once this is over." James kissed his forehead and tried to keep his tears at bay.
It was a beautiful day with the sun shining as wisps of clouds hung above us. People dressed in their best clothes clean and pressed. Snow had demanded that we were dressed as video was taken during the ceremony for all of the Capitol to watch as each tribute was selected.
The walk to the Justice Building was short but felt like a lifetime. All of us watched as our children said goodbye to each other and both Garrett and I hugged Prim for love and support assuring her that she was coming home to us after the ceremony. Peeta stood tall and straight his face emotionless but softened when he both held onto Delly and Prim's hands escorting them to the registration tables.
Due to Katniss' diligence, Prim had only one tessarae in the lottery. And with Jimmy's generosity in hiring both my girls we were certain that Prim wouldn't need to add another tessarae for years to come. She only had three years left and this whole nightmare would be over.
Then the moment came as the ceremony commenced. I heard and felt nothing. I was numb. Garrett held my around my waist for comfort and support. My knees buckled from shock and horror when the worst of my fear was realized. My daughter Prim became the female tribute for the 74th Hunger Games. Katniss was beyond herself as she screamed Prim's name over and over her voice filled with anguish and pain. James and Rye held back as she attempted to run to Prim. "Prim! Prim! Prim!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. The sound will forever be etched in my mind. I held onto Garrett as I couldn't believe what had happened.
Prim was escorted to the platform. I could tell she was trying not to cry. My strength left me weak at the knees had it not been for Garrett I would have collapsed on the floor too shocked to cry at first.
The Capitol representative continued as she reached inside the bowl and announced the male tribute. "George Norman." The look relief on James and Rye's face was only for a second as another voice rang out into the air.
I didn't think it could get any worse. Then I heard a familiar voice, a loud and firm sound. "I volunteer as tribute. I volunteer as tribute." It was James' son Peeta volunteering for George in his place. He stood within the throng of boys yelling to be heard.
"Peeta, don't," Rye yelled. I doubt Peeta heard him as he walked towards the Peacekeepers heading his way to escort him to the platform to join Prim.
'Why?' my mind screamed. He was safe and clear. No more games, no more fears. He was finally with the girl he loved since he was a boy. Then I realized that he volunteered for Prim. He was going in the games for my other daughter who he had only known for a few months. 'Why?'
Prim POV –
I felt hot and sweaty as the sun beat high above us. When the two Peacekeepers approached and escorted me to the platform from behind me, I heard Katniss screaming my name. I was too shocked to turn around to look at her. I was chosen and headed to the Capitol.
"Aren't you a cute little thing," Ms. Effie said as I stood before her. "Why don't you stand right here, dear?" She pointed to her left side. I turned and faced the crowd. I looked back and saw that Katniss was being held by Mr. Mellark and Rye. Mrs. Cartwright carried Tyler in her arms. She had tears in her eyes her nose red and eyes puffy. Mom and Dad had their arms wrapped around each other. I was too stunned to speak or feel anything.
Then, Ms. Effie called out the male tribute. I sighed when I heard George's name. Then gasped in shock when I heard Peeta's voice as he volunteered to take his place.
With his head held high, Peeta walked forward and shook Ms. Effie's hand. "Peeta Mellark, you are an inspiration…our first volunteer in…years." Afterwards instead of standing to her right he walked over and hugged me.
"I'm sorry, Prim," he whispered in my ear. I was going to ask him why he felt that he needed to apologize when Ms. Effie interrupted us.
"You need to stand over there," she said in stern manner. "This is not appropriate."
"No," Peeta returned as he took my hand. She raised one brow and smiled. "I will stand right here with Prim."
"Oh, how sweet," she said. Then, she turned around and addressed the crowd. I was still in the state of shock to listen to what she said. The next thing I knew we were both quickly escorted inside the Justice Building.
"You both will have half an hour before we head out," she announced. "Peeta, come this way and let Prim say good bye to her family." My eyes grew wide in fear. I didn't want Peeta to leave my side.
"I know Prim's family and she knows mine," he started. "They can see us both at the same time."
"Are you two related," she asked.
"No, but we know each other's families," Peeta explained. "We will see our families together."
"That is most irregular," Ms. Effie huffed. "I don't think it's proper."
"Let them say good bye to their families together, Effie," Mr. Abernathy stated as he walked into the room. I had always looked up to our Victor. He was a close friend to my dad and mom so I felt comfortable around him. I had to be since he was now my mentor. Mr. Abernathy looked mad at Peeta. I didn't know why?
For a few minutes Peeta and I were alone. "I'm really scared, Peeta," I admitted. He reached over and wrapped his arms around me. I felt safe with him and was happy that he was with me. Was I selfish for having him volunteer? I wondered what Katniss was feeling––angry and scared mostly I supposed. Mad at Peet for volunteering and scared for me.
"I know I'm scared to," he confessed as he rested his chin on the top of my head. I admired him from afar. Whatever girlish crush I had for Peeta diminished once I knew how Katniss felt for him––even when she didn't know herself. When Peeta became my sister's boyfriend I was overjoyed for the both of them. He made Katniss very happy.
"Why'd you do it?" I asked. "You were free. You didn't have to volunteer."
"I…when I heard her call your name, I didn't believe it," he started. "I thought she made a mistake then the peacekeepers walked to the platform…I heard Katniss screaming for you and…I had to do something."
"But now Katniss is going to lose the both of us," I said. "She's…it must be killing her to know that we're both…going to ––"
"Hey, don't think like that," he interrupted. "You're gong to be okay, Prim. I promise you that I will protect you. You're going home."
"Peeta, you can't make a promise like that," I gasped in horror. He can't mean what he implied. That he would sacrifice his life for me so that I would go home. Before I could argue back, a door opened and my family rushed in. I ran to them.
"Prim," Katniss called me. I was encased in a group hug. I looked over to Peeta who was also engulfed group hug from his family as well.
"Peeta," Mr. Mellark said as he wrapped his arms around him. Delly was in tears. Rye's face was red with worry and fear. Mr. and Mrs. Cartwright stood and watched as Mrs. Cartwright gave Tyler to Peeta. The baby fussed and fidgeted as he reached out to his uncle grabbing both his ears. Peeta laughed for a few seconds then groaned. Tyler's little fingers were wet saliva dripped from his finger wetting Peeta's hair and ears.
"Ew, Tyler. You're fingers are wet," Peeta muttered with mock disgust as he gave Tyler raspberry kisses on his plumb cheek.
"He's started teething," Delly announced. "It's like he want to put everything he lays his hands on in his mouth." To prove it, Tyler reached over and tugged at Peeta's hair. "Tyler, no." She grabbed him from Peeta. "Hair not good, I'll get you a piece of bread when we go home."
Peeta kissed his nephew as his hand caressed the back of his head. He had tears in his eyes. I had to force myself from breaking down and concentrate on my family.
"Prim. I'm so sorry," Katniss blurted. "I'm sorry that I couldn't volunteer to take your place. You know that I would have." She wiped tears from her red cheeks.
"I'm so scared, Katniss," I stated as my head to look at Peeta and his family. "I really feel awful but…I'm so glad that Peeta is with me. Does that make me a bad person?"
"No," Dad pronounced so loud that he startled me. "Peeta volunteered. You didn't force him. So don't feel bad."
"Listen, you stick to Peeta and do as he says," Katniss advised. "You do whatever it takes to survive. You stay alive, okay? Don't give up."
"But Katniss, I don't know how to fight––"
"Stop. You and Peeta will do whatever it takes to survive. I…just promise me that you will do that. That you won't give up."
"I don't know, Katniss––" I sighed in resignation.
"No, I mean it. You swear to me, Prim. You swear to me that you will do whatever it takes to survive because you can't…you can't…" Katniss reached out and hugged me tight.
"I promise, Katniss. I promise," I whispered into her ear. "Go see Peeta." Katniss closed her eyes then opened them again. "I love you little duck. Remember your promise." I nodded my head.
"I love you too." I hugged her one last time and turned to my mom.
"Mom," I said and I reached out to her. I sobbed in pain and anguish as she held me like she used when I was little girl. I didn't know what to think. I was headed to the Capitol to…die. No one in District 12 except Haymitch Abernathy survived the games. I imagined horrible things I saw during the other arenas. "I'm really scared."
"I know honey," she tried to comfort her as best she could. "Just…listen to me. I know that I failed you and Katniss when your father got hurt. I can admit it and I will never forgive myself for abandoning you when you needed me the most. But listen to me…you do what can to survive. Stick with Peeta. He'll take care of you." I nodded my head. I turned to Dad but was surprised that he was not by my side. He was with Mr. Abernathy their heads close together as spoke quietly to each other. "Go say goodbye to your father."
I ran to Dad wrapping my arms around his waist. I closed my eyes to memorize his scent––cherry wood and pine. The look of pain was etched on his face. He knelt down which was difficult for him. He winced when his fake leg touched the ground. Dad spoke to me.
"Hey, there," he said soft and low. "You're going to be okay. I want you to promise me to stick close to Peeta. Never leave his side and listen to him because I know that he will take care of you. Trust him and listen to Mr. Abernathy. He will take care of you as well." I trusted my dad and if said I'll be okay then I believed him. I also knew that I could trust Peeta to keep me safe.
"You listen to dad," Katniss reiterated. "Never leave Peeta's side or Haymitch."
Dad wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed my forehead. Katniss stood beside them as she waited for Peeta to finish his good byes to his family.
Katniss was always in control of her emotions. When she hurt you never knew it because she kept her emotions to herself. But when she was angry you knew it. She never held back emotions of anger, disgust or displeasure. I never knew the depth of her feelings for Peeta until now––anger, fear, anguish and love. It was written all over her face. Emotions she never thought she felt for anyone. I knew she loved me, but with Peeta something blossomed and grew. She was Katniss I knew that existed but was too afraid to release until Peeta Mellark broke that shell. Mom walked towards us.
"Katniss," Mom said her name soft but firm.
"Mom," she sobbed as she wrapped her arms around her. I was startled at first. It had been years since she turned to mom for comfort or for anything. "Prim…"
"Shh…I know, Katniss. I know." she said as she rubbed her back. "Listen, you're old enough to make decisions without any influences from your dad or mine. But…" she hesitated. Katniss was at age to make her own decisions about her life. "You grew up fast and without me…I failed you."
"Mom, please stop," she said as she pulled away from her. "Now is not the time. I can't do this now."
"I'm sorry," she continued. "Let me say one thing." She nodded her head. "You've grown up fast. You dealt with a lot of things on your own and you're a better person and daughter that any mother would be proud of. I love you. So…keep in mind the time you have left with Peeta. Tell him…tell him what he needs to know to…while you still can."
"I can't tell him," she sobbed. "If I tell him, it's like I'm choosing one of the to come home." I wanted to interrupt them.
"You're not. I'm telling you tell him what needs to be said, what he need to hear and most of all what you need to say to him before it's too late." She gasped her arms wrapped around her waist. "Don't be afraid anymore, Katniss. Don't let fear and regret be the one thing that stopped you from telling Peeta how you feel about him. Do it now before he gets on that train." Katniss turned to look at Peeta. He was with Dad talking low and soft so no one could hear them. God what has happened and what do we do?
Off to the side, Peeta's family stood waiting for the moment when he would walk out of the room and their lives. There was so much uncertainty. Mr. Mellark looked devastated, his nightmare come true. He had already lost a son and now Peeta…
I took turns saying good to people who came to visit me––friends, classmates, teachers. They were a lot––both Seam and Merchant. I was surprised.
Mom walked over to Peeta. "Peeta," she called him. His brows furrowed and he looked uncertain. Before she could speak he ranted.
"I promise you that I will protect Prim and as God as my witness, I swear that she'll come home. I mean it," he swore. "I promise, you Mrs. Everdeen, I'll do whatever I can to make sure Prim goes home. I swear it." I shouldn't have been eavesdropping but I couldn't help it.
She sighed. My heart ached for the Peeta…no the young man in front of me. Mr. Mellark was beside himself with grief, pain and anger. I could see it in his face. "Peeta, I was just going to say 'thank you.' Thank you for volunteering. You didn't have to…yet you did and I know why. You want to protect and keep Prim safe. You'll do whatever it takes to make sure she survives even if it means…sacrificing your own life to do it. I….I don't have words to express. What you did….it was noble, brave and stupid." He smiled, weak but filled with relief. "Just remember that you have a lot of people who love you and appreciate what you've done…sacrificed. You were free and then you did this for Prim." She choked as words failed to reappear.
"Lily, it's time. Peeta needs to see and say good bye to Katniss," Dad reminded her.
Suddenly, Katniss appeared by Peeta's side. They looked at each other for a second when she abruptly and with great force pushed him back that he almost felled backwards. He winced as she took a step forward his head down, his eyes downcast as tears appeared in his eyes. "I'm so mad at you."
"Katniss, please try to under––" he interjected his eye pleading for her to understand.
With an angry and anguished growl Katniss grabbed him by the front of his shirt and kissed him, hard. Everyone gasped at her behavior, her display of affection for him. Then she wrapped her arms around him as she sobbed into his shoulders. "Thank you, thank you," she muttered into his shirt tears tracking down her red cheeks soaking his shirt. Her embrace was tight around his neck. He held her with such gentleness and care.
Haymitch cleared his throat. "Hey, everyone this is not a circus. Clear the room to give Peeta and Katniss time alone," he commanded.
"That's highly inappropriate to––" Ms. Effie declared. Haymitch stared her down.
"These two kids have suffered enough. He…they only have a few minutes to say goodbye to each other. I don't give fuck…everyone needs to leave the room now." He barked the order once again as he placed a hand on my shoulders. "We'll stand over here and give Peeta and Katniss some privacy." He walked me over to the other side of the room with mom and dad trailing behind us. Peeta waved good bye to his family.
"Lily, Garrett, I promise you that I will take care of Prim while she's under my care," Mr. Abernathy promised them. "I swear I will keep her safe until…" He stopped and looked at Dad. "You need to do…something. I can't help you, but whatever it is do it fast before they reach the arena." I was confused. Do what? What can they do? Peeta and I were headed to the Capitol and there was nothing anyone could do.
"Haymitch, I know we don't have much time," Dad interjected. "Keep them both safe until…" He looked around us. "Thank you and watch yourself. You're in much danger as they are." There were four Peacekeepers in the room standing guard.
"Just know that I'll do the best I can to keep the both safe," he started. "I'll guard them with my life." He turned to look at me then Peeta. There was sadness in his eyes and something else…something I haven't seen in a long time––steely determination and anger.
I nodded and sighed in relief. I had known Mr. Abernathy most of my life. Before the games I heard stories, he was a gentle and kind man. His experience during his arena changed him as I thought how all victors changed. He never reconnected society especially after the death of his family. He became an angry, bitter recluse that lived alone in the Victor's Village. He wasted away for months drowning himself in alcohol.
But something happened to him or rather someone happened to him that changed him––enough to engage and reconnect with certain citizens of District 12. It was if he found purpose again something to live and fight for.
James POV ––
I'm stunned, paralyzed to the point of despair. When George Norman's name was announced I was relieved and overjoyed. Peeta was safe. But I should have known better and had expected it. Peeta volunteered. He volunteered as tribute to protect Prim. It didn't surprise me but…shock turned to disbelief then anger. How could Peeta throw his life away? I was so angry with him when I should have been proud.
"James," a female voice disrupted my thoughts. It was Evelyn. She appeared behind me her face stern, emotionless. The visitation time for Peeta has yet to begin as the door to the room remained closed. Anxiety and fear bubbled inside me expanding like a loaf of bread. The more heat added the bread harden and burned––this was what I felt as I anticipated my visit…my last visit with Peeta. To add matters worse, she appeared as her presence added fuel to the fire.
"What do you want?" I said trying to keep my temper in check.
"I…I want to see Peeta?" she requested. My jaw dropped as I shook my head. Did she just ask to see my son? My son whom she never held any feelings or love? She was out of her mind if she thought I would let her near him especially now.
"Why?" I questioned my curiosity was peaked.
"Why not? I'm his mother," she said in an indignant manner. "I have every right to say good bye to Peeta. He is still my son."
"No" I said firm and hard as I turned my back on her. She reached out and grabbed my arm. She gasped as I steeled my eyes towards her. "You lost that privileged the first time you struck Peeta when he was only four years old. And I'm not going to stand here and argue with you."
"But––"
"Get away from me, Evelyn and don't you dare see him now," I fumed. "You are the last person he'll want to see." She huffed in annoyance.
"What are you doing here, mother?" Rye uttered. I looked up to see Rye and Delly. Augusta Cartwright, Delly's mother carried Tyler in her arms.
"Rye, my son," she called out to him. "Oh Delly, I heard the news." She started to walk over to her when he blocked her path.
"You stay away from my wife," Rye demanded as he noticed how his mother eyed Tyler. "And if you think that you're getting Tyler, don't even think or attempt it. Peeta made a provision for Tyler's welfare which means he will be raised by me and Delly."
"Rye, Delly is with child," she started. "You'll need help and––"
"Any support or help that Delly and I need will come from me, dad and her family."
"But––" Rye wrapped an arm around his wife's waist and pushed her past Evelyn.
"Good bye, mother," he said with finality.
"You're not wanted her," I said. "And I'll make damn sure that you won't get near Peeta. He needs family who love and support him." I turned and walked away.
Evelyn's presence only fueled my anger. I took deep long breaths to calm myself. This may be my last chance to see my son alive and being angry with him was something he didn't deserve. Peeta was my baby boy. I couldn't bear to lose another child. I had almost lost him so many times but this…was his own doing. My emotions ranged from despair, devastation, and anger. Peeta needed me now and I didn't want him to remember me being mad at him for being noble and courageous.
When I first entered the room to say my goodbye he held Prim in his arms like a big brother comforting and protecting his little sister. Her blond head nestled on his chest her eyes big with fear and despair. I was speechless and felt devastated. Prim ran to her family.
"Peeta," Delly cried as she hugged him. With her parents behind her, Augusta handed Tyler to him as his nephew reached out for him.
His interaction with Tyler broke my heart as his nephew grabbed his ears with his wet hands. "Ew, Tyler. You're fingers are wet," Peeta muttered as he kissed Tyler's cheek.
"He's started teething," Delly explained. "It's like he want to put everything he lays his hands on in his mouth." Tyler then reached over and grabbed Peeta's hair. "Tyler, no." Delly grabbed him from Peeta. "Hair not good, I'll get you a piece of bread when we go home."
"Hey, little guy," he said with a kiss on his cheek his words soft and comforting. "You be a good boy with Uncle Rye and Aunt Delly. They'll keep you safe. I know that I won't have to worry about you." His eyes directed at Rye and Delly. "You keep him safe Rye." His brother nodded his head. I could tell Rye was barely keeping his emotions at bay.
"You're an asshole, Peeta," Rye said. There was heat in his tone. "You shouldn't have done it. What were you thinking?" Delly gasped.
"Rye, how could you talk to Peeta like that?" she said between clenched teeth. "You know why he volunteered. Would you be mad at him if I was called?" Rye looked sheepish and embarrassed, but stood his ground.
"Yeah, I would be mad at him too," he continued. "Because I'd be losing my wife, my child and my brother." I rubbed my chin. Rye had a point, but it was a moot one since Delly wasn't reaped.
"I know you don't understand Rye––"
"I do understand," he interrupted. "It's who you are. I don't understand you sometimes because…you're just too good and noble for this world. I hate that you're willing to sacrifice your life for a girl you've known for a few months."
"She's Katniss' little sister," Peeta argued back. "She's not just random stranger, Rye. If I can in any way protect her, I will."
"I know, Peeta. I know," he repeated. "I'm sorry. This…this maybe the last…I'm just sorry." He hugged his brother and tears fell from his eyes not caring who saw it. "I love you, Peeta. Fight and stay alive. Come back home to us."
"I love you too Rye. Take care of Tyler."
"Peeta?" I called out to him when they released each other.
"Dad?" he returned his eyes downcast. "Please don't be mad at me too." The ball of saliva in my throat impeded my ability to form words. "Please try to understand why I did it." I did understand more than he realized.
"Peeta, I know why," I finally voiced as I took him in my arms. His body trembled. "I won't make any promises." I released him and looked into his eyes. "But please know that I'll…we'll do whatever we can to…get you and Prim out of this." He nodded his head but looked skeptical.
"Dad, I…I know that I haven't made things easy these past few months," Peeta started.
"No, don't." I blurted. I knew what he was trying to do––he was trying to ease my guilt and shame for not protecting him against his mother and Snow. I failed to keep his safe from harm as a father. He endure years of emotional and physical abuse from his mother as I stood and watched.
"Dad, please. I need to say this before I leave. I don't…I was never or angry with you. I was disappointed but I understand why now. I'll never know what it's like to be a dad." He looked at his nephew his eyes big and wide wondering why there were so many people inside a bright stark room as he suck a finger in his mouth. Tyler looked sweet and innocent. I couldn't fathom the thought of him in the lottery at his first reaping ceremony. I just lost Graham, I was losing Peeta and Tyler…in twelve years he was next.
"Don't talk like that Peeta," I uttered. He was giving up––it was a vibe I sensed from him. He would do what he could to help Prim survive. I wished to high heavens that Jay was here to stop all this. I needed to talk to him now––get him to save Peeta and Prim before they reached the Capitol. I was choking on the weight of fear, anger and frustration.
"I do love you dad," he said. "And I'm really glad that you are my dad." His words broke me. Even after he endured and experienced so much trauma he found room to forgive me and tell me he loved me. He was more than I deserved.
"I love you too Peeta," I said as I embraced him one last time.
I had to leave the room. Before I left I spoke to Garrett. "Bakery one hour," I said as I stumbled out of the Justice Building with Rye and Delly at my heels. "Stay with Peeta for as long as you can."
I had to get my son back. I already lost one and I wasn't about to lose another. This I vowed to myself as I ran to the bakery. It was all I could do before I broke down in public. My lungs ached as I struggled to breath through my mouth. I walked into the kitchen––the heart of the bakery. Everywhere I saw my sons––Garrett, Rye and Peeta were imprinted. Ghosts of them everywhere from the tables, to the utensils and equipment they used everyday. I noticed Peeta's apron as it hung on a hook on the storage door. It was stained with grease, burns marks and food coloring.
I recalled Peeta's first cupcake he frosted as I guided his tiny hands at the age of four. I remembered his toothy grin and shriek of delight. In truth, the frosting was messy and uneven but to Peeta it was his first accomplishment as he wanted to work at the bakery alongside his brothers. For his fifth birthday, I ordered an apron of his own with his name embroidered on the chest––his name in cursive with dark orange thread.
I remembered the proud look on his face as he baked and designed his first cake at the age of eight. His first creation of the cheese buns which he perfected by 12. He was destined to take over when I retired. Both Graham and Rye knew it. That was my vision as I grew old and watched them with their wives and families––grandchildren to spoil and love. I had a piece of Graham in Tyler for he was all I had left of my eldest son. As for Peeta, I dreamt of dark haired girls with crystal blue eyes that had their father's smile and nose or a little blond haired grey eyed boy with Katniss' pout and disposition. Either way they would have been Peeta's. Now that dream was shattered and with that dream I shattered everything that was arm's distance. Equipment, bowls, cups and glass flew. I couldn't stop my rage as months of anger and frustration exploded within me. I yelled, screamed and cried for my boys and their lost future. I still had Rye but i was losing hope and my heart was shattered into pieces. How could I move forward when I felt that half of me was dead in side.
"Dad," Rye's voice filtered through my haze of self-pity, anger and fury. "Dad, stop." Through my haze my eyes focused on the destruction I has created. My business didn't matter to me at the moment, but one look at my remaining I knew i couldn't give up. I reminded myself that I still had Rye and Tyler to love.
"Dad, you're bleeding." Delly said as she picked up a hand. My knuckles were red and raw. By the entryway, Lily and Garrett stood with Katniss besides them her face eyes puffy and red with a look of anguish I felt. i was ashamed that she saw me like this.
I panicked once I noticed that Tyler was nowhere to be seen. "My Tyler, where's my grandson," I asked as fear replaced anger when I remembered seeing Evelyn at the courtyard.
"He's with my parents," Delly answered. "We were worried so we came looking for you." With a heavy heart I sat on a work bench my hands cradled my head. Whatever energy I had left was zapped as the ache in my heart intensified. The kitchen was a mess leaving me with more guilt that I compounded. I sighed in relief but it was fleeting.
"Mr. Mellark," Katniss' voice penetrated my mind. "I…I…can I go to Peeta's room?" Her voice shook.
"Katniss! That's inappropriate––" Lily started to say but I interrupted her.
"It's all right, Lily. Yes, go ahead, Katniss," I granted her permission. How could I deny her anything? "Stay as long as you need." Within seconds and without any hesitation she bolted up the stairs. A door slammed a few seconds later. "I can't believe this is happening." It was not directed to anyone more to myself. "How did this happen?"
"Snow," Garrett answered. "We were certain that President Snow wouldn't rig the lottery to get to Peeta, but he managed to get him to volunteer. I should have seen it coming." I narrowed my eyes at my friend. Anger resurfaced but I held it back. It was a moot point to yell, argue and be angry with him. Peeta would have wanted me to move forward and not dwell on past mistakes or resentment. Numbness descended seconds later.
"Rye," I began. "Why don't you and Delly go home? Tyler will need you now."
"No," he argued. "I'm staying to clean up the mess. I need to be here. I need something to do or I'll go crazy back home thinking about…."
"I'll stay to help," Delly concluded. "Mom and Dad can take of Tyler. I need to be with Rye right now." I nodded my head. I was happy that Delly was saved as this was her last lottery. She and Rye could…will move forward with their life, a new baby on the way to boot. They were lucky. Suddenly, I felt trapped and claustrophobic.
I excited the bakery because I knew Garrett would follow me. The next conversation we were going to have couldn't be in front of Rye and Delly.
"Tell me we're going to do something," I blurted once I knew Garrett was at hearing distance. "Tell me that my son and your daughter will be saved before they reach the Capitol." I waited for his response. "We need to get them off that train now."
"Jimmy, you know that we can't…intercept them on the train," he said. "They'll…the Peacekeepers will be expecting it. They'll be expecting us at every stop they make."
"So what are we going to do?" I knew he was right but I was desperate and I knew he was as well. However, Garrett remained calm and I hated and envied him for it.
"I have a plan," he stated. "It's risky but…it might work." Garrett rubbed his upper right arm above the area where his fake arm met his limb. Looking at him you couldn't tell he had lost his leg and arm. He hid his disability well with the exception of the fake hand he wore. "I just…I want you to know that I promise to get our kids out before anything will happen to them."
"When?" I asked. I needed his assurances that both Prim and Peeta were not going into the games.
"I need to––" He stopped as we turned to see four Peacekeepers patrolling the streets. We watched them for a few seconds. Just as they were around to turn the corner they stopped and glared back at us then walked away. "Listen, I noticed that more drones are now flying around the district so…we need to be careful where we are and who we're talking to." It was true as I noticed the new drones that hovered above us during the ceremony especially ones that were directed at Peeta and us.
And coincidentally I spotted one hovering thirty yards down the alley. I gestured to Graham who spotted it as well.
"I…not going to say anymore but know this," he began. "I swear to you that I'm going to get them off the train no matter what it takes." He didn't reveal his plan but I trusted him. I trusted Garrett to save our kids because he too had a lot to lose.
AN: Thank you for your patience and continuing reading Destiny. I will be posting the next chapter on Tuesday. The next POV's will be from Katniss, Peeta and Haymitch. Have a great weekend.