Glissando

In music, a glissando[ɡlisˈsando] (plural: glissandi, abbreviated gliss.) is a glide from one pitch to another. It is an Italianized musical term derived from the French glisser, to glide.

Stardate 45148.36

(Saturday, 24 February 2368, 07:14 hours, ship's time)

For the first time in a week, I woke up feeling rested, but that had a lot to do with the man who had spent the night working in bed, rather than at his console, while I was pressed up against him. Three times in the night, I had tumbled from restful sleep into violent nightmares, and all three times Data had been there, waking me with soft words, stroking my hair, holding me while I sobbed.

I smiled softly when I opened my eyes, because the light was brighter than usual to help me avoid nightmares, and I'd caught my android boyfriend watching me sleep. "Hey," I greeted softly.

"Good morning," he responded, matching my tone. "You appear to be significantly less exhausted than you have been all week."

"You can tell that when I've barely opened my eyes?"

"Yes," he said. "The skin around your eyes is less swollen, and the color has returned to a shade that is more typical of you, and your eyes themselves are no longer bloodshot. Your pulse is also slightly slower than it was last night, which indicates that you are experiencing less stress. Finally, it has been four point two three nine hours since your last nightmare, while your recent pattern has been to wake in the throes of such a dream after an average of only ninety minutes of sleep."

I snaked a hand out of the covers so I could reach for, and tease, the back of his neck. I loved the way the ends of his hair curled under slightly, hugging his neck. That part of his hair was so soft. I couldn't help touching it. "Thank you," I said, keeping my voice low. "Thank you for being there every time I needed you over the last week. Thank you for guarding my sleep, and soothing my nightmares, and…and for what you did last night."

"You are welcome, Zoe, of course, but…all that I have been doing is acting within my defined role as your boyfriend and your lover."

I started when he said the last word. "Lover?" I asked. When had he decided to consider us lovers? Is this why the counselor used that word? But I didn't let him answer. I jumped to the topic I had really meant to broach. "What you did…kissing me everywhere that he – that Lore - had hurt me …that felt like a ritual, and you can't tell me that whatever information you've accumulated on 'how to help your partner cope with sexual assault and trauma' gives recipes for rituals."

"No," he agreed, "I cannot."

"Then where did it come from? It was beautiful, and it was perfect, and…" I stopped and made a helpless gesture.

"You asked if Lore's marks showed on your skin. They did not; they do not. All the physical harm you experienced has been healed, apart from your wrist. I could not erase the fact of what happened to you, but I could, last night, and as often as you require me to, replace his touch with my own."

"Did you know it would work?"

"I did not know, I only…hoped."

"If I want to talk about what happened…more than just what I had to say in that meeting with the captain…but really talk about it – with you, I mean – is that…okay?"

"Do you wish to talk about it, Zoe?"

"Not right now, no. I just want to know if I can. If it's…you've been so patient and supportive, and… and I owe you –"

"No."

"No, I can't talk to you about it?"

"No, you do not 'owe' me. There are no checks and balances, Zoe, nor are there entries in a ledger. We are a couple, a unit. There is no debt; there is no owing. If you are in need of an anchor, then let me be that for you. It is… what I am 'good at.'"

"So, that's a yes, then?" I teased lightly.

"Yes," he said. "You may talk to me about whatever you wish, and I will listen. I cannot guarantee that I will be able to offer insight, however."

I smiled and moved my hand from where I'd still been playing with his hair, to his chest. I don't know why I was so entranced by that expanse of smooth gold skin, only that it was the best way to feel the thrum of him moving through me.

"Sometimes," I said, "insight isn't necessary. Sometimes, just the act of talking is enough. And when that doesn't work, you could try that ritual again. I think there might be a few spots you missed." I gave him a look that was both a challenge and a promise, the latter to be collected at an unspecified future date. "I'm going to use the bathroom, and then I'm going to go back to sleep for a while. If you could squeeze a plan for our usual Saturday session, something that doesn't involve me having to use my right hand, into the other eight million tasks that are active in your brain right now, that would be cool."

He didn't correct the number of items he was actively working on. He did make a point of watching me as I slid out of bed and walked to the bathroom. When I returned a few minutes later he lifted the covers so I could get back into the bed more easily, and then formed them into a cocoon around us both.

"I wish to make a request of you, if you are 'up to it,'" Data began, when I was nestled in his arms. "I would like to continue your dance lessons today. While you will still require some use of your right hand, it will only be to hold mine, and I believe we can manage a way for you to do so comfortably."

I smiled. "I'd like that," I said. "Could you lower the lights all the way? I think I'll be alright with real darkness for a couple of hours."

The room plunged into darkness, but I was wrapped in Data's arms, and thinking about dancing with him. Nightmares wouldn't dare ruin this for me.

(=A=)

Stardate 45148.68

(Saturday, 24 February 2368, 10:04 hours, ship's time)

"Damn it!" The only reason I hadn't hurled my brush at the mirror is because I knew it would just make Data come running. As it was, he appeared in the open bathroom door, anyway."

"Let me help," he said.

"Do you do hair now as well as handle undergarments?" He'd had to help me put on the bra he'd so very deftly removed the night before. "Gah! I hate this. I hate that I can't even sleep through the night when I'm with the one person I trust more than anyone. I hate that I keep hearing his words in my head and feeling his hands on me. I hate that I go from fine to jumpy in the blink of an eye, even when there's no reason to be. I hate that I can't do normal things, and I hate that everyone's fussing over me, and I really, really hate that I actually need you to help me."

If my outburst fazed him at all, he didn't let it show. "Zoe," he took the brush from my hand, and pulled me against his chest. He was still in pajamas – well, pajama bottoms – having graciously given me the first turn at the bathroom. I was pretty sure he didn't actually need to shower, not being someone who sweated, ever, but I knew from experience that it was part of his morning routine. "This is not a permanent condition. Your cast will be removed on Monday morning, and that alone will allow you to resume much of your normal routine."

"There is that," I sniffed. "I just… I know you won't judge me, but I also don't like being this weak and helpless in front of you."

"You have made that abundantly clear," he said, the phrase coming out with just a hint of snark. Snark he probably absorbed from me. "I have replicated coffee for you. Come sit and drink it, and I will handle your hair."

"Wait, you actually do do hair? Since when?" My original remark about it had been rhetorical, but I was honestly curious.

"There are many instructional videos in the ship's computer library," he explained. "I anticipated that there would come a time when I would require the information." He kissed the top of my head. "Zoe, you are neither weak nor helpless," he reminded me as he guided me to the table. "You are recovering from trauma and a related injury. Please do not be so hard on yourself. "

I sat at the table and noticed that he'd replicated more than coffee. There was also a spinach and mushroom omelet. "Doesn't it frustrate you at all?" I asked.

He took the chair opposite mine. "I have experienced frustration," he admitted. "Not as an emotion, but as a condition. When you were on Lore's ship, and I was required to put the greater mission of preventing the Crystalline Entity from doing more harm ahead of bringing you home, I was frustrated and I also experienced helplessness. For an officer, for an android, the inability to act, the necessity of putting the greater mission ahead of the more personal one, that instilled a sense of helplessness. I was certain you were with Lore. I had traced his ship. And yet there was nothing I could do."

His words were uttered in his typical matter-of-fact inflection, but there was a hint of softness around his eyes, a tiny shift in the set of his jaw, that leant them more weight. I reached across the table with my left hand and covered his. "Counselor Troi suggested that your need to be part of my recovery is nearly as strong as my need for you to be the person I lean on." Unspoken, but plainly heard nevertheless, was my question: Is that true?

"That is not an inaccurate assessment," he said. He gestured to my plate, and encouraged, "Eat," and I withdrew my hand so that I could. "You are my girlfriend, and your harm came at the hands of my brother. Either of those things is enough to cause me to assume some responsibility."

"If it wasn't my fault," I said between bites of omelet. "It certainly wasn't yours."

"It is my preference that you not be in pain. I have recently discovered that it is also my preference that I be part of the easing of your pain when it occurs."

Inside I was melting. The tiny revelations, coming more and more often, of the depth of Data's caring for me made me want to offer him comfort. Actually, they made me want to offer him a lot of other things, but it wasn't the right time. I searched for an appropriate response, but no words seemed adequate, so I just said, "You are. You always are."

I finished breakfast, and Data twisted my hair into a loose braid down my back, with a few wispy tendrils left floating around my face. I studied his handiwork in the mirror and smiled.

"Do you approve?" he asked.

"I think you could give Mr. Mott a run for his money," I answered, smiling. "Thank you. If Keiko and Chief O'Brien have a girl, you'll be able to put your hair dressing skills to work."

"That thought had not occurred to me."

"I just assumed that's why you'd done the research. You're going to be the baby's honorary uncle, even if they don't make you godfather, aren't you?" I grinned, and teased, "'Uncle Data' has a nice ring to it."

"The O'Briens and I have never discussed what role, if any, I will have in their child's life. The research on human hair arrangement was originally conducted when Lal chose a human female form. I nearly deleted the information from my memory banks when she opted for shorter hair."

"Why didn't you?"

"I am uncertain. Retaining the data simply 'seemed like a good idea.' It is not as though I am approaching the limit of my storage capacity."

"And it gave you a good excuse to play with my hair," I teased.

Data gave me the look that meant he knew I was teasing him but couldn't rebut what I'd said. "That is true," he agreed. "I have reserved the holodeck for only two hours. If we are to complete a dance lesson this morning, we must leave."

"I'm ready when you are," I said.

(=A=)

For two hours, we danced on the holodeck, and by the end of our time, I was comfortable with three different social dances. Data had ended our session with the polka, "…though I am told it is rarely included in formal dances any longer."

"Then, why teach me?" I asked.

"There are two reasons," he explained. "First, the music is light, what you would consider 'happy' or 'festive,' and I believe a less serious mood would be beneficial to you right now."

"That's fair," I said. "I have been kinda dark and broody."

"I did not mean to criticize. As we have discussed, you must not hide your real feelings from me, even when they are 'dark and broody.' After what you have experienced, I believe a more somber emotional state will be your 'normal' for a while."

"Yeah, probably," I agreed. "What's the second reason?"

"You are typically an athletic person. You surf, you swim, you have taken performance dance lessons for most of your life. The polka does not involve impact, so your wrist will be protected, but when executed correctly, it can be quite exuberant."

"You think I need the physical release," I said. I wasn't asking, but I was touched that he knew me so well. "You're not wrong. I told the counselor yesterday morning that I felt the need to punch things."

"Ah."

"Yes, exactly."

"Shall we begin?"

It turned out that the polka, once you were at a decent tempo, felt a lot like flying.

Stardate 45157.42

(Tuesday, 27 February 2368, 14:48 hours, ship's time)

Ten-Forward was busier than was usual for late 'afternoon' on the Enterprise, but, as Data explained to me over the late lunch I'd invited him to, that was because the ship was between assignments.

"If the boring parts mean I get to spend time with you in the middle of the day, I'm all for them," I said. "Besides, we're celebrating. Someone at this table actually went to class this morning."

"Zoe, I am glad to hear that," he responded. "If you require any assistance in 'catching up' with your classes, please do not hesitate to call on me, but I am confused. I thought Counselor Troi had recommended that you remain out of class for the remainder of this week."

I shook my head. "When we met yesterday afternoon, she said I could try half-time. Morning classes only. It's not really help I need, though, I don't think, so much as sanctuary."

"Sanctuary?"

"Mom and Ed have started planning their wedding, and I'm happy for them, I am, and I'm even happy to participate, but it's really hard to concentrate, especially since he's basically living with us now, and that means Bogart is living with us – he ate one of my flip-flops the other day…"

"Ah! Then when you request sanctuary, you are seeking a quiet place to concentrate on your homework?" He waited for my confirming nod, then continued. "My quarters are at your disposal, of course."

"I don't want to abuse your generosity," I said softly. "I'll always ask before dragging my schoolwork there. I don't want you to get tired of me or feel like I'm in the way."

"You have said more than once that my quarters 'feel like home' to you. If you wish to consider them a second home aboard-ship, I am not averse to that."

"But not tonight, right? It's your turn to host poker night, isn't it?" But his reply was delayed because our food arrived: spanakopita and yellow lentil soup with a lovely lemony accent. One order, double utensils, and a pot of mint tea.

"You are correct. We are typically finished by midnight, if you wish to meet before your curfew."

"I love you to bits, Data, but I think I'll survive without a goodnight kiss for one evening. Especially since I have your class tomorrow. Um…am I allowed to ask you for help with that catching up, or should I ask Geordi, since he's in charge of my grades?"

"I do not believe it is a conflict of interest for me to provide assistance, should you need it," he said after a brief hesitation.

I smiled around one of the triangles of spanakopita. "I'll let you know after class tomorrow. Tonight, I have a different sort of assignment I have to work on."

"May I ask what it is?"

"Always. But it's not that interesting." I hesitated, trying to find the right words. "I spent most of last week ignoring my friends, even though I knew they were worried about me, and then I spent the entire weekend with you. A quiet, mostly private, weekend after all the fuss was what I needed, but sometimes…" I trailed off, toyed with my soup spoon for a moment, and started again. "Being with you…it requires me to interact on a different level. Sometimes, I feel like I'm way older than I'm supposed to be…so I need an external reminder that I'm still seventeen… and that I can be with you, and that doing so doesn't mean giving up typical teen experiences, it just means that I choose them a little bit more mindfully."

"I am not certain I understand."

I favored him with a rueful grin. "No, but I think I win the babbling portion of today's event, anyway. I guess all I'm trying to say is… you have your game night, and I have mine. My 'assignment' is to go hang out with my friends."

"Are you going to tell them what happened while you were…away?"

I shrugged. "Not sure yet. I probably should. I mean… I feel pretty normal right this minute, but my moods have been shifting like sand the last few days, and Counselor Troi said it could be months before I'm evened-out…"

His hand covered mine on the table. "You know that I am here for you, whenever you need me."

My smile, that time, was softer. "I know, and I love you for it…and for about a million other things, but you can't be my only support system."

We ate in silence for a while, but when I'd finished my soup, and the last piece of spanakopita, Data broached a new subject. "If your schedule will allow, I believe we should resume work on your audition pieces. The information you provided specified a deadline of Stardate 45204 for sending your audition recording to the Martian Academy. While I am certain that you are ready to record the required pieces, I know that you will feel more confident with more rehearsal time."

"Too true," I agreed. "Why do I get the feeling you don't think Saturday Sessions will be enough?"

"Because they will not. Our quartet is currently on hiatus; I propose that we begin this Thursday evening, and save 'video night' for our weekends."

"It's only for a few weeks," I agreed. "I'm good with that." I drained the last of the tea from my cup, and then set it aside. "I should get going. I promised Dana I'd meet everyone at sixteen hundred hours."

"I will see you out," he said, as we both rose to our feet.

Commander Riker and Chief O'Brien were standing together at the end of the bar, and they beckoned us over, as we were leaving. "It's good to see you out and about, Zoe," Riker said. "I'm sorry I haven't stopped by to speak with you or your mother."

"There was really no need," I said. "But today's actually my second day back in the world." I grinned, explaining, "I spent yesterday playing in the dirt." I'd gone directly to the arboretum after getting my cast off, and spent the morning helping an incredibly pregnant Keiko plant Selayan bromeliads.

"Keiko mentioned that," the chief put in. "She was grateful for the assistance, and the company. She's due along any minute if you want to say hello."

"Thank you," I said. "But I have somewhere I have to be. Data?" I turned to him. "Make sure you win scads from everyone tonight." I knew he could tell I meant for him to stay with his friends, and he took that cue.

"I will do my best," he said, "but Commander Riker is a formidable opponent."

"Have her give you a kiss for luck," O'Brien teased good-naturedly.

I rolled my eyes at that but turned to Data anyway. "It cannot hurt," he pointed out, apparently agreeing with the chief's suggestion. His lips met mine briefly. "I will see you later," he added sotto voce, and I knew he meant he'd be stopping by after his game, after all.

Smiling, I left the three of them at the bar, and went to set up my own personal anger management therapy.

(=A=)

Stardate 45157.59

(Tuesday, 27 February 2368, 16:21 hours, ship's time)

"We're going to need a bigger table," Josh said as he began arranging the board and pieces of a new game he'd acquired. It involved each of us being in charge of different ships and having to build crews and work jobs like ferrying cargo or passengers or hacking into computer systems in order to earn in-game money and become 'solid' with different sector leaders.

"We should go to a holodeck and use your café program, Zoe," Dana suggested.

"Tempting, but you know holodeck time has to be reserved eons in advance," I pointed out. An idea began to blossom, though, and I added, "Maybe there is an alternative place we can play."

"You have your 'idea face' on," Rryl observed. "That usually leads to excitement."

"So, it does," I said. We'd been hanging out for about twenty minutes, if 'hanging out' included my friends complaining that I'd been out of class for a week. They'd meant well, and let it go when they could tell their good-natured ribbing bothered me, and then we'd picked a game to play. Except it was a game that clearly required more space than we had available. "I was thinking we could go use one of the classrooms. No one's ever on the school deck after classes, and the tables are bigger."

"Oh! Good idea," Rryl said.

So, we gathered up the game pieces and trooped down the corridor to the 'lift, and then to the empty schoolrooms.

"Is it me," Dana asked, "or is it slightly creepy in here when nothing else is going on?"

"A little," I said. Whatever cleaning agent had been used on the tables and writing boards had a hint of bleach or ammonia in it, and I was trying not to smell it, because it reminded me of the bathroom on Lore's ship. "Computer, lights to 80 percent of standard lux."

The room brightened considerably, and that helped me to ground myself, but my best friend caught something in my expression, and asked, "Zoe, are you okay?"

I gave her a rueful smile, "Yeah… I mean… mostly."

Dana reached out to squeeze my shoulder. "If you want to talk about it…" she began.

"I do, and I don't," I said. I glanced up at the boys, who both wore sympathetic looks. "How much do you already know?"

"Commander Data said you had been kidnapped," Rryl answered.

"Yeah," I said. "Among other things. Look… I'll tell you, because I'm going to need all your help getting past it, probably, but… I'm scared of what you'll think of me."

"You're our friend, Zo'," Josh stated, as if that was everything. "We'd rather know than not."

"Yes," Dana agreed. "I'm pretty sure whatever we're wondering is worse than what happened."

"Don't be so sure," I told them, but we all took seats around the table in the classroom we'd chosen – the room where Ed taught our literature class, actually – and I told them the short version of where I'd been for three days, and what had happened, leaving out the rape part. "He left me there, after the crystalline entity was destroyed. He just left me…"

"And Data found you, right?" Dana asked. "He cancelled class that Friday, and when I went to his quarters to ask what had happened, he seemed… I don't know… really small."

"You went to his quarters?" I don't know why that surprised me, but it did.

"Well, yeah," my friend said, as if it was an obvious choice. "Your mother was so upset. Rryl's mother, and my father, and Josh's father all sat with her, and the Prof was almost teary and then you were back, but not seeing people."

"Except for a meeting with the captain, and seeing Counselor Troi and Doctor Crusher, yesterday was the first time I've been anywhere but my quarters, Data's quarters, or the medical decks since I got back." I told my friends. "I really wasn't trying to avoid class."

"You're not sharing something," Rryl said, and I stared at the Akkallan boy. "You wish to, but you are worried."

"I didn't know your people were telepathic," Josh said.

"We are not," Rryl answered. "But Zoe's pain is almost physical, and she is my friend, too."

I squeezed my eyes closed. "Lore… he didn't just hit me and toss me around his ship. He…" I whispered it, because saying out loud was too much. "He raped me."

"Asshole!" Josh announced what I'm pretty sure they were all thinking. I should know; I'd thought it enough times.

Three pairs of arms enfolded me, and even though I stiffened at first – I really disliked being grabbed – I managed to remind myself that my friends would never hurt me. After a few seconds, it actually felt almost good.

"Zo' if you don't want to play…?" Josh said, after he, Dana, and Rryl had all let me go. "I mean, if you want, we could just go watch a video…?"

I shook my head. "No," I said. "Playing a game is exactly what I need right now. I've spent so much time inside my own head… and Data's been amazing, really, but sometimes I need to just be seventeen, you know?"

"Alright, then," Josh said, standing up so he could better reach to arrange the board. "But don't think we're gonna go easy on you, just because your boyfriend's psychotic evil twin tried to make you his bitch."

Something about his declaration struck me as being so absurd that I couldn't help but giggle, and soon enough the giggles became outright laughter, and then everyone else was laughing too.

(=A=)

We'd been in the empty school room, playing our game for about an hour, when the lights went out.

"Josh, what did you touch?" Dana and I asked together.

"Nothing!" our friend protested, but none of us would have been surprised if he had. Josh was always the one to press a button just to see what it might do. "I swear, nothing."

Dana started to refute her boyfriend's statement, but Rryl hushed her. "Listen! The computer's saying something."

At first, I thought he was crazy, but as the emergency lighting began to glow, we all heard the mechanical female voice of the ship's computer.

This is a ship-wide emergency. Please remain calm. All Starfleet personnel report to emergency posts. Civilian personnel, please report to designated shelter areas. This is not a drill. Repeat: this is a ship-wide emergency…

"Well," Josh said, "that kind of ruins the mood."

"Understatement of the year," Dana sing-songed. "Where is our designated shelter area?"

"Actually," I began, "I think we're…"

"Hello? Is anyone in here?" The voice that cut me off was oddly familiar, but it wasn't coming from the corridor. It was coming from above us. There was a clang and a thud, as something roughly humanoid landed in a heap on the floor against one of the walls. "That… that wasn't supposed to happen."

Josh, Dana, and I all looked at each other, and said at the same time, "Barclay."

Rryl, on the other hand, asked, "Who's Barclay?"

"I – I am." The lanky engineer had managed to find his feet and had joined our group. "It's Lieutenant Barclay, actually," he said to Rryl. "You can call me Reg. I've seen you before, but I don't know your name."

"He's Rryl," I said. "From Akkalla."

"Ah, Akkalla," Barclay said. "That's a water world."

"Have you been there?" Rryl asked. He loved talking about his planet.

"Oh, yes. I was posted there for a while. Longest two weeks of my life."

"Since when does Starfleet post people for only two weeks at a time?" I had to know.

"It was decided that the position wasn't the best use of my skills. It might have had to do with the fact that I almost drowned. Twice."

"You don't swim?" Rryl asked.

"It's not my strongest skill, no." He looked at each of us, as if trying to decide if we were friend or foe. Finally, he settled on me, which made sense, I suppose, since I'd had the most interaction with him. "Zoe… does anyone know you're here?"

"You do," I said. "Otherwise, probably not. We needed a bigger table, and no one uses the classrooms after hours. We heard the emergency warning and were trying to figure out where our designated shelter area was supposed to be, and then you…landed. Why were you in the duct?"

"I was working in one of the access tubes when the emergency bulkhead activated. This room was the closest place I could safely ex – exit." He tapped his comm-badge, which chirped hopefully. "Barclay to Bridge, I'm in schoolroom –" He broke off, looking at us.

"Seven," Josh whispered.

"- seven." Barclay continued. "Bridge?" There was no answer. "Well, that – that's not good," he said, more to himself then to us. "Comm systems are down," he announced, though I wasn't sure if it was for our benefit or his own. "As to your emergency shelter point, it should be the school multipurpose room."

The school took up roughly sixteen rooms, including the daycare center on deck 14. The multipurpose room wasn't that far away. "Should we put the game away first?" Dana asked.

"N-no," Barclay stammered, and then, more firmly, he repeated the word, "No. We should all leave right now."

He led the way toward the door, and then out into the corridor, but when we got to the main door for the secondary school suite, that door wouldn't open. "Really not good," he said, and that time I knew he was speaking to himself.

"Maybe we should take a moment to put the game away, after all," I said. "Give Reg time to figure something out."

"Agreed," Rryl and I walked back to the classroom where we began and Josh and Dana followed after a beat or two, but none of us made any attempt to pack up.

Barclay set about pulling apart the door panel, which took about ten minutes. We heard him clunking and muttering. "Manual override worked…sort of. It's open about three centimeters."

"Can we help?" Josh called from the doorway. "Maybe find something to use as a lever?"

We looked around, but the table and chair legs were all too thick, even if they had been removable, and while he had a couple of padds, Barclay was certain they were too flimsy.

"So, we're stuck here?" I asked, when he returned to our space.

"It would, I mean I think… well, yes. But life support seems to be functioning, so we're probably not in any imminent danger."

"The teacher's lounge is in our section," Dana supplied helpfully. "Let's see if we can get in there. If we can, then we have access to a bathroom, if we need it."

That door was standing open, and the bathroom door functioned perfectly when we tested it. The lounge had a replicator, as well, which we also tested. It was limited to basic menus but seemed to be working.

"Why are the doors within the section functioning but not the door out of the secondary school and into the main hall?" I asked.

Reg appeared to think it over. After a minute or so, he said. "I can't be certain, but my guess is that the power failure isn't entirely ship-wide, but more large clusters of the ship, making it seem ship-wide. Systems here and there are fine, but there are patches where they're…not."

"So, what do we do?" Dana wanted to know.

"We stay in one place, and wait for someone to find us," the engineer said.

Josh glanced at all of us but settled his gaze on Barclay. "Want to play a game?"

(=A=)

"I have now completed a 'job that is dirty' by delivering several metric tons of cow manure to the colony at New Texas," Lt. Barclay announced several hours later. "This means I have completed the task-list. I win!" He seemed both perplexed and surprised.

"Lt. Barclay, this is not a designated shelter area," came a voice from directly behind him.

We all looked toward the door, realizing all at once that the room illumination and returned to the 80% we'd specified before the power had gone out.

"Commander LaForge…I'm sorry… I didn't mean to…" His stammering got worse when he was nervous, I realized. "The main door wouldn't open."

"Lt. Barclay realized we were all scared," I put in. "So, instead of climbing back into the duct to see if he could blow the door open from the other side, he stayed here with us." Could he tell I wasn't being entirely truthful?

"And then we coerced him into playing," Josh added. "To help distract us. He won."

But Geordi was laughing. "It's alright," he said. "I don't blame you. A lot of people got stuck in the wrong places. I'm just glad you're all okay. I actually came down here looking for Reg."

"Sir?"

"I need your help in sickbay. We have a very delicate patient."

It took me less than a second to figure out who the only patient who would require two engineers could be. "It's Data, isn't it?" I asked. "Geordi…please tell me?"

"Yeah, Zo', it is."

"How bad?"

"I'm pretty sure we can repair him," he said seriously. "But it's –"

I cut him off. "I want to come with you."

Geordi was silent for what seemed like a long time, and I braced for an argument. My friends were quietly packing up our game. Finally, he decided. "Okay," he said. "Let's get going… the rest of you, pack up and go back to quarters. Your parents are probably worried."

"Are communications back up?" I asked.

"Yeah, they are." As if to demonstrate, he tapped his badge. "LaForge to sickbay. I'm on my way back with Lt. Barclay. He was with Zoe and some of her friends in the secondary school."

"Acknowledged. Thank you, Geordi," came Dr. Crusher's voice from the tiny speaker.

I followed both engineers out of the room, down the hall to the door that functioned as if there had never been a problem, and into the turbo-lift. They used the trip to discuss what was wrong with Data – something about melted power couplings – and I tried not to panic. I'd never seen Data injured before, and just the idea of it was making me feel nauseous and strange.

(=A=)

Stardate 45158.76

(Wednesday, 28th February 2368, 02:33 hours, ship's time)

"Where's his head? Geordi, where's his head?" That had been the first thing I'd said when confronted with Data's scorched and melted-looking body on the diagnostic bed around eleven-thirty Tuesday night.

"Commander Riker's bringing it," he said. "Doc, you have the scans?" he continued, addressing Dr. Crusher.

"Sending them to your console now," she said from her position near the sickbay computer's main controls.

"Looks like all of his primary power couplings need to be restored, as well as re-attaching his head. I don't see any more internal damage. We're going to have to cut his uniform off and do a visual examination of his skin."

"Repairing the bio-plas sheeting is my job," the doctor said. "You and Reg can handle his internal repairs, can't you?"

The blind engineer nodded. "Yeah. There's a lot of couplings, but the actual repair work isn't that difficult. I estimate two or three hours, if we use medical nanites to do some of the work."

"Na- nanites?" Reg asked, having apparently been listening as well as reading the information that was duplicated on his console – he and Geordi were positioned across from each other on either side of the table. "Is that… is that really a good idea? We've had trouble with nanites before."

"These are limited duration medical nanites, Reg," the doctor assured. "They vaporize after ninety minutes and are eliminated from the body via blood and fluids."

"Don't worry, Reg; we're not putting them inside you." Geordi teased.

"That is a consolation," Barclay replied, but it was obvious he wasn't kidding.

Once the two men began working in earnest, with the help of the nanites, Dr. Crusher finally registered my presence. "Zoe, are you sure you want to be here?" she asked, not unkindly.

"Data's been here for me, every time," I said softly.

"Yes, but Data isn't a young woman who is clearly," she whipped out her tricorder, scanning me as if to back up what she'd already surmised, "dehydrated and probably hungry."

"I'll sit on one of the empty beds and eat soup if you force me, but I want to… No. I need to be here."

She met my eyes, holding my gaze. I didn't back down. "Alright," she said, "you'd be the first person we'd notify if anything happened, anyway. Just don't distract Geordi and Reg." She made as if to leave but halted and gave me a wry grin. "I'm holding you to the soup, though. Come through to my office. That's the closest replicator."

I followed her into the small but somehow homey office, let her select a snack first, and then ordered a bowl of Italian wedding soup. "It's weird," I mused aloud, "how things can change so much in less than a year."

"Oh?" She sat in her office chair and motioned for me to take one of the chairs opposite. "Have a seat."

I scooted the chair closer so I could use the visitor side of her desk as an ersatz dining table. "The first time I saw Data's machine-y insides, I felt like I'd trespassed on something private…like it was an intimacy I hadn't earned yet, even though all he was doing was adjusting an actuator in his arm." She gave me a look, and I explained, "He'd done something to approximate tendonitis during one of our music lessons, and was setting back to spec."

She grinned, "Sounds like Data. How about now?"

"Is it weird that I can look at the headless body of a man I've shared a bed with, and my first thought is, 'If he makes it through this, I want to throw a costume party and make him dress as the Headless Horseman?'"

She snorted with laughter. "Now that I would love to see," she said. "Speaking of which… I wanted to ask if you'd consider being part of my next play. It's right up your alley, and you don't have to audition."

"It depends. What's the play?"

"Little Women," she said. "I want you to be our Jo. You have the perfect combination of girlish spunk and young womanly grace, and I'm pretty sure the person I've got in mind for the professor would play against you perfectly." She glanced out at the main part of sickbay.

"Data?" I asked. "You want Data to play Professor Bhaer?"

"Don't you think he could?"

"I know he could," I said.

"Thank you, Zoe. I agree." I turned in my chair, expecting to see Data, and having a moment of disconnect when it was just his head, held gently in Commander Riker's hands. "It is very late," he continued, oblivious to the bizarreness of the situation. "You should not be here."

"Uh-uh, don't even try to make me go home," I said. "You are not the only one of us who gets to keep vigils. Besides, I want to see how this re-capitation thing works."

He managed, though I don't know how, to convey the image of a tilted head, without having a neck to do it on.

Riker winked at me and went to deliver Data to…Data. I drained my mug of soup and got up to recycle it. "I'd like to do it," I said. "Play Jo. I wanted to be her for a while when I was little."

"I think a lot of little girls want that," the doctor mused. I caught her wistful smile as I left her office.

(=A=)

By two-thirty in the morning, all of Data's melted couplings had been coupled again, his head had been reattached (which was less interesting than I expected), and the doctor had regenerated the pale, gold bio-plas sheeting that formed his skin. He'd been deactivated for much of the work and would remain so until everything had been completed.

There had been some joking around when it had come time to make that final repair, as it had required cutting Data's uniform off him. Commander Riker, who had stayed to watch the procedure as well, kept making ribald jokes to 'let Zoe undress him; she's probably pretty good at it by now,' and things of that ilk.

I knew he was only doing it to cut the tension but after about the fifth crack, I snapped at him, forgetting his rank, and said, "Seriously, are you twelve?"

For one long moment everyone – and everything – went silent. Then the commander let out this huge roar of laughter. "Finally," he said. "Finally, you treat me like a normal person. How many times have I asked you to just call me Will?"

"A lot," I said, as I didn't have Data's capacity for spouting off precise numbers. "But I pretty much assumed you didn't mean it."

He moved around the diagnostic table where Data remained, preternaturally still, and sat next to me on the bio-bed I'd been perched on. "You're not an officer under my command, Zoe. You're the daughter of one friend, and the… significant other… of another. Use my name, please?" The words were quiet, but the extension of friendship was real. "After all, you're the only other person I know who truly appreciates cheeseburgers and fries."

I had to laugh at that. "Okay," I said. "Okay, Will, but next time we're getting the curly fries, no matter what you say."

While we'd been talking and laughing, Geordi, Reg, and Dr. Crusher had completed the last of Data's repairs. All the panels were sealed. All the nanites purged. "It's time," Geordi said. "Zoe," he continued, as he and Reg rolled Data slightly onto his side. "Want to do the honors?"

I slid off the bio-bed and approached the diagnostic table. "Zoe," the doctor began, standing over him on the other side of the table, her tricorder at the ready. "Data has a power switch located in –."

I cut her off, with a soft, "I know."

I don't know what my expression was, but hers told me she was reassessing me, and my relationship with her colleague. "Of course, you do," she said after a moment.

Touching Data's skin, with all those people around, was slightly unnerving, but watching one of them activate the switch would have been more so. In my head, I kept flashing back to year before, when I wanted to touch him, and couldn't, and more recently, when touching him, when him touching me, had become – not routine – because I don't think either of us was ever going to not feel some small bit of wonder – but... typical, I guess.

My hand found the button beneath his skin, and I pressed, but I was caught in memory, and when life surged back through the man I loved, my head sent me back to his brother's ship, to when he was on top of me, and I was trying to…

"Pigeon mustn't touch the button… ah-ah-ah."

No. I said the word in my mind. Stop.

"Pretty pigeon. Poor broken bird."

"NO."

"Zoe?" Dimly, I realized that Data was wiggling his fingers back and forth, testing to see if connections were truly restored. "Zoe, are you alright?"

"Pigeon's a broken bird," I said, but I was hearing myself say it, at the same time.

"What's going on?" Geordi's worried voice.

"She's having a flashback," the doctor said.

"She attempted to deactivate Lore when she was with him," I heard Data explain. "Performing the same action on me must have triggered her memory loop."

"Humans can't have mem- memory loops, can they?" Barclay. If I were more myself, I'd be taking wagers on how soon he'd be looping.

"Actually, we can," the doctor said. "Zoe, you're on the Enterprise. You're safe. Data's here, and he's fine, and you're safe."

I could feel Geordi and Commander Riker hovering behind me. "Too close," I said. "Everyone's too close."

"Give her some space, gentlemen," the doctor said.

"Can you give her something?" Will asked softly.

"NO!"

"Zoe cannot shake herself out of her nightmares if she is under sedation." Data explained my behavior again. "Zoe, it is me. It is Data. You are in sickbay. You re-activated me. You are safe." He was speaking to me the same way he did after every nightmare. I saw him shift his position on the table, so he was sitting up, with uniform-clad legs dangling over the side. "May I touch you?" he asked.

I stepped into his arms, let him enfold me. "I'm sorry," I said into his shoulder, even though I meant it for everyone.

"No," he said. "You have done nothing wrong. Take a deep breath."

I did as he bade me.

"Another."

Wash, rinse, repeat. A few minutes later, I pulled away from him, and looked around sheepishly. "Well," I said. "That wasn't embarrassing at all."

"You have nothing to be embarrassed about," Dr. Crusher said in her best don't-argue-with-me-I'm-a-medical-professional voice. "It hasn't even been two weeks since…everything. You're doing remarkably well, considering."

I nodded.

"I don't understand. What did Zoe go through? I thought she just wandered away from everyone on Melona?" Trust Reg to be so far out of the loop he was orbiting a completely different star.

"Do you mind if I don't explain just now?" I asked. "I only had my first morning back in class today – well, yesterday, now – and I'm kind of fried."

I started laughing at my own choice of word, even as Data corrected me, in his perfect deadpan, "No, Zoe, I was fried. You are merely exhausted." He glanced around the room. "If everyone is satisfied that I am sufficiently repaired, I will escort Zoe home, and conduct a self-diagnostic on my own."

"Let me get you a medical tunic to wear home," the doctor said, disappearing for a moment, and then returning. "Zoe, stop by here after you've slept. I'll make sure you're excused from classes tomorrow."

"I'm only back in class half time, and that teacher is already here," I said. I felt thick and silly. Exhausted. I met Data's eyes, after he'd pulled the borrowed shirt over his head. "Home sounds good."

He bid goodnight to everyone and guided me out of sickbay and to the nearest turbo-lift, but we didn't go to deck ten, which was technically where home was for me. We stopped at deck eight, and his quarters. "Data…it's a school night. I can't be here if it's a school night."

"As you are not going to class tomorrow, and as there are extenuating circumstances, I believe your mother will make an allowance."

"I'm really tired."

"I know."

I managed to use the bathroom and splash water on my face, and then I went to the bedroom, so desperate to be horizontal that I was skinning my clothes off as I moved through the space, finally collapsing onto the bed. He was half undressed, holding his pajama bottoms in front of him, and I saw him register my nude form, and note that I'd picked up the pajama top I typically wore during our... sleepovers, and tossed it aside. "No."

I couldn't explain why, I was so tired, and the flashback I'd had had rattled me more than I think even he had realized. The thought of anything but skin touching my skin was somehow repulsive. I felt like I was the one who had melted, was melting.

"Zoe…?"

"Can you… can you just… not wear those tonight?"

His yellow eyes were so very wide. Alarm, I think. Or concern. Both? I couldn't process. "Zoe, you are in no state for –"

But I cut him off. "No. I just… I want your skin, against my skin. I need…" Contact, my brain screamed. I need contact. I need you to hold me and have nothing between us.

He seemed to understand what I couldn't find the words to say. "As you wish."

The sheets were cool and soothing against my bare skin. His skin was also cool against mine, also soothing, but in a completely different way.

"I almost lost you," I murmured. "I'm not ready for that."

"But you did not. I am fine."

"In the morning, you're going to tell me why you were all scorched and melty."

"Yes," he promised, his words coming as breath across my cheek. "I will."

I nestled against him, the way I always did. One of his arms wrapped around me, resting on my breast in a way that managed to not be sexual, despite our mutual nudity. It was just… just us. This was safety. Security. Home.

"Sleep," he said softly. "Sleep."

I had no intention of doing anything else.

Notes: This chapter begins slightly before, and ends slightly after, the episode "Disaster."

Selayan bromeliads aren't a real thing, but Selay is a planet populated by reptilian humanoids. I think they're the ones who were hunting for live food in the corridors of the Enterprise in one of the early seasons, the one with the fish people, maybe? The Stardate Data references converts to March 15th, 2368. The game Zoe and her friends are playing might be a riff on Firefly: The Board Game (inspired by acquiring the last expansion.)

Zoe first sees Data's android innards in chapter 48 of Crush. She learned about his power switch in chapter 12 of this story.

A couple of people have asked why the kids weren't tossed around the room. I decided that a) the gravity issues weren't felt throughout the ship, and since the school is likely one of the safest parts of the ship, gravity didn't cut out, and b) I didn't want to risk having Zoe injured again so soon. She's been through enough.

Revised 12 May 2019