LUCY'S POV

Landon tugs on my pant leg.

"Sissa!" I look over having to put a finger to Luke's lips.

"Sissa, I need you to tie my shoes!" I sigh a bit to myself, "You're four years old. You'll have to learn to do it yourself soon." I tie his shoes anyways, handing him and Luke their backpacks, sending those two out the door to school. Two down, one to go.

I walk upstairs, opening the door of a bedroom and walking in.

"Lysander, it's time to go to school."

Of all my brothers, Lysander's always been the biggest pain in the ass because he's retarded. Today, he's lying on top of his bed, dressed for school (though not really well) and humming a single tone.

"Lysander, get up." I walk over and grab the back of his shirt, pulling him up and putting shoes on his feet no matter how much he fights me and screams. I drag him out the door with me, grabbing both our backpacks.

Mom and Dad are out doing important stuff as officials of the district, so I, the oldest of the Galvan kids at 14, am responsible for keeping my three younger brothers out of trouble. Luke is the second oldest at 10, then Lysander at 7, and Landon's the youngest at 4.

It's my patriotic duty to be a good big sister, or at least keeping them from getting expelled.

~.~.

I hear a bottle slam on the table in the kitchen downstairs. Somehow I know it's going to be another of those nights.

I survived last time Dad got drunk, but this time I'll bet it's going to be worst. My Mom was killed by Peacekeepers a bit after I turned 15. My Dad didn't take it well at all. Ever since then, he's been drinking like crazy.

When my Mom passed I lost both of my parents. I realized I'd have to step into their shoes and be both a Mom and a Dad to these boys. I don't know how to take care of them well, though… I guess I'll have to learn.

I'm 17 now, Luke's 13, Lysander's 10, and Landon's 7. It's a lot to keep track of, and it makes my head pound trying to organize everyone's schedules. How can anyone do this shit!?

As soon as I hear the noise, I go to the boys' rooms to get them out of the house for a bit. If we can slip by him, he won't be able to hurt us.

Yes, trying to deal with the boys is a pain, but they're all I have left. Luke and Landon leave together, Luke offering to take Landon shopping at the market as they slip out the back door.

I grab Lysander and take him out, too, trying to silence him so Dad doesn't notice. Somehow we get out and I decide to take him to the old, retired dock by the water. It's a popular gathering spot, but not this late at night.

As I approach, I see a figure sitting there already. I slowly sit down next to it, and it doesn't take long for me to recognize this guy from school.

Spacey green eyes, awkward, stiff posture, lips constantly set in a straight line… Sampson Kiefer. His shirt sleeve's ripped and I think he's bleeding, he's got a black eye, and his face is red like he's been slapped. His eyes look dark and murky today.

"What are you doing here?"

He looks up, his pupils dilating. His eyes have a look in them I often see in Lysander's.

"S-Sorry… Did I spook you?"

He answers quickly, "No."

There's no possible way I'm dumb enough to believe him. Instead of pushing it I just close my eyes and feel the breeze on my face. When I open them again, I look around for Lysander.

"Son of a bitch, Lysander's gone!" How'd that happen!?

I feel Sampson's eyes on me.

"My retarded little brother, he disappeared!"

Sampson pauses for a second. "Not nice." Then he gets up and starts walking, dragging me behind him. "Come."

He starts walking and lets go of me, and I stumble after him. He walks to the lame excuse for a "park" we have here, searching under things and behind other things. Soon he looks behind a bush and Lysander pops out from behind it, giggling. "You found me!" he says happily, giggling.

"How'd you do that?!" I ask Sampson. He looks at my little brother, his eyes softer than I'd ever seen them. He doesn't answer my question.

"Sissa found me!" Lysander cheers, "Sissa!"

Sampson stares at me, his eyes unforgivingly critical.

"How did you find him!?" I ask.

"He think like me. He think like I do." He puts a finger on his temple.

"Who, Sissa?" Lysander asks.

"Lysander, this is Sampson. Sampson, this is my younger brother Lysander."

"Hi Sammy!" says my brother. I roll my eyes.

"Hi hi," Sampson says quietly.

We sit down back on the pier, Lysander sitting next to me and Sampson sitting by him.

"Why are you here again?" I ask Sampson. "You never told me."

"Why're you?"

I think, unsure of what to say. Finally, I just tell the truth. "My Dad's getting drunk."

He nods, looking out onto the water and not asking any other questions.

"Now what about you?"

He looks over at me, staring as he points to his black eye. "Dad."

I wince, "Oh." I didn't know he had such a story…

"Not nice," growls Sampson quietly, burying his face in his knees, "Not nice!"

"Yeah, he doesn't seem very nice," I try.

Sampson keeps growling "Not nice" over and over again until his voice decrescendos into nothing.

I'm about to talk again, but Lysander starts chattering away, and the thought is lost. Sampson listens and nods, even though a lot of it makes no sense. By the end of the night, Lysander's still chatting away and Sampson still seems to be listening.

By the way Sampson looks at him, I already know that he's a better Big Brother than I will ever be a Big Sissa.

I know that now I have to step up and take care of my brothers and Sampson. It's my job. I have to learn how to be better at taking care of Lysander, and Sampson, too, even though he's older than me.

I don't know if I'll ever be able to make myself a better sister or "parent," but today's the day I vow to start trying.

~.~.

A couple months of meeting at the dock later, and it's a dark night before the reaping. Dad's drunk, Landon and Luke went to the market, Lysander's in his bed.

"Ly?" I look into his room.

"I'm not," he says, "Not."

I sit next to him, stroking his hair gently. "Lysander, we can't stay here. It's dangerous. Daddy will hurt us again."

"Not."

I think of how to possibly get him out of bed fast without scaring him. I've been trying to be good about that. Usually it's been good, but today he's being stubborn.

"Don't you want to go to the dock?" He looks up. I smile a little bit, "Don't you want to see Sampson?"

He lights up, "Sammy!"

I smile a little. "Yeah, Sammy. Want to go see Sammy?" He nods, crawling out of bed. "Sammy, sissa!"

I take his hand and smile, "Yeah, let's go see Sampson." I walk out the door, him giggling, and walk with him to the dock, where the figure is sitting, as always.

Sampson looks worse and worse each time I see him, but he never lets me help him.

"Sammy!" Lysander runs to him, hugging him happily. I sit next to him on the dock, letting my feet touch the top of the water. Sampson sits next to him, Lysander sitting himself down between us and chattering. I listen to him today, trying to following what he's saying, smiling and nodding.

Lysander talks until he eventually curls up and dozes off. I smile at him, picking him up and putting him down in the grass, making sure to keep a close eye on him. Don't want to risk him falling in, he can't swim.

Then I sit next to Sampson, looking up at the clear sky full of stars. Our shoulders lightly touch, the warm, salty air blows across my face, making my ponytail sway pleasantly.

"He's really sweet… I never even knew it until you helped me see it."

"Hm."

"It's funny…" I laugh a little bit. "How much I've changed in so little time thanks to you."

He nods, looking at Lysander and smiling a little bit.

"He's cute. He's like our child."

His brows furrow in confusion. I smile a little, gently touching his cheek with a finger, "Don't worry about it." He nods.

"I'm really glad we met," I whisper quietly. "I was lost but somehow you found me." I laugh a little, thinking about the many times we've had to go searching for Lysander. I found him all by myself once or twice.

"Hm." I keep my hand on his cheek, smiling gently at him.

"We'll take you in any day, Sampson. Whenever you need it. We'll feed you."

"No." He shakes his head, "No. Can't."

I smile sadly, stroking his cheek gently. "Whenever you want to, tell me."

"Hm."

I smile and move a little closer to him, touching the tips of my toes to the water. I close my eyes and freeze the moment in my mind. I don't ever want to move from right here.

"This is perfect…" I whisper, "Everything about it is perfect."

"Hm."

His eyes are trained on me, and I look into them, moving some of the shaggy hair away from them. They're really a pretty shade of sea-green. I smile gently, wanting to see him smile at me like he smiles at Lysander.

"Don't you agree?"

"Hm." I've found that response's usually meant affirmatively. I keep smiling at him, taking a deep breath. Then, before I can even control my actions, I tilt my chin up and kiss him gently. The kiss is warm and sweet.

It's not my first kiss, I've kissed many before, but for some reason this is different, even though he doesn't kiss me back. I pull back slowly, a smile spreading across my face. When I look up, his pupils are dilated, his eyes are wider than usual, and he blinks at me.

Shit. I can practically feel my heart split open in my chest. "I…I spooked you… I'm sorry…." I get up, pick up Lysander gently, and make haste to get out of there before Sampson can say or do anything else.

~.~.

I sit in the lovely Justice Building room and wait. I already said goodbye to Lysander (who doesn't get it), and Landon.

Luke's head is hanging as he walks in. He sits down in front of me, staring at the floor. I put my hands on his shoulders.

"Luke."

He looks up, brown eyes already overflowing with tears. "Lucy…" he says quietly, in a teary voice.

"Listen to me. Are you listening?" He nods. "Okay. You're it now, Luke. You're the one that has to care for them."

"No!"

"Sh, it's okay. You can do it."

"No! I'm only 13!" he shouts, "I can't do it!"

"Sh, Luke, listen." He hyperventilates but quiets down soon. "I'm going to go into the Arena, and I'm going to survive the only way you survive in the Galvan house. By being a complete bitch." He whimpers, I keep on talking, "I'm going to come home. But until I get there, you're it, alright? Make sure you keep an eye on Lysander, won't you?"

"I can't do it!"

"Yes you can!" I put my hands on his shoulders, looking into his teary chocolate eyes. "You can do it, Luke. I believe in you. I took over when I was 14, and you're already a better big brother than me. Relax, okay? I'm going to come home."

He wipes his eyes and the tears don't stop. "I can't do it, Lucy, don't go…" I hug him and he hugs me back, burying his face in my shoulder.

"Listen," I whisper, "If for some reason I don't make it and Sampson comes home, don't be rude to him. Take care of him too. Can you do that?"

"B-But-"

"He needs you. Just like Lysander and Landon. Promise."

He sniffles and goes silent into my shoulder for a long second before he says, "I promise."

"Thank you." I kiss the top of his head, "I love you, kiddo, and I have faith in you. Count down the days, three weeks and I'll be back to you."

"Three weeks," he repeats quietly, wiping his eyes, "Three weeks."

"Yeah." I smile and he tries a smile back.

"I love you too."

I smile at him and nod as he exits the room, escorted by Peacekeepers.

It's not until we're walking to the train that I realize it.

I'm going into the Games with Sampson.

The only boy that doesn't love me, and he's the only boy I want to love me.

And I'm going into a fight to the death with him.

Only one of us can survive.

And I'm still not sure which of us I'd rather it be.