She hadn't been happy when he had told her what happened, and honestly, neither was he. How could he be? And now she was being almost hostile to him.
He had called her and asked what to do.
'Why should I help you? You can't even follow basic instructions,' had been her answer, and he'd fumed. How dare she? After everything, he'd done. In turn, he'd threatened to end it all, to hand himself to his brothers and tell them everything. To be done with it. She had, thankfully?—he wasn't sure any more, but she had backed down, apologising and stating she was simply worried. She'd asked him to come to her. She'd written a quick email. One that… He wasn't sure made sense, but she'd said she could fix this.
It would all be okay. He just had to come to her location.
It struck him hard, like a hit to the chest, suddenly and unexpectedly.
It had been her idea.
All of it.
He pulled the car to over and sat thinking.
Everything had been down to her. She'd come to him, claiming to be there to help him. She had played on his knowledge and detachments from the world. He would willingly admit he found everything… odd. His brothers had too much luck, and over the years, their injuries and scraps bothered him less and less. There was never any question in his mind as to if they would be okay, if they would survive a situation, because of course they would, they were 'the good guys'.
And she had known and played on that.
How had she known?
How had he not thought of this before? What was wrong with him?
She'd claimed to be a part of him, a part of this dream. She was there to help him wake up. That would be how she'd known if he asked her. She had fuelled his doubts, and he had stupidly just believed it, gone along with it, and in part he still did. The world didn't make sense, but there was and had always been a level of uncertainty and that was only growing.
He wasn't sure of anything right now.
Not her, not himself. Nothing.
He sat in the car on the edge of the road, halfway there with his head in his hands and only one thought circling his mind.
He missed Kayo.