A/N I had an extremely hard time with this chapter as I am patterning it after a few couples I personally know…all who have been married well over twenty years. I don't think I'll ever be totally satisfied with it; however, I know all the main points are right so….like it or not, it stands as it is now.

Chapter Twenty Six

Nick held Ruth's hand, as they walked through a wide open field; they had ridden their horses to the south part of the ranch and tethered them to a couple of trees. Now they were enjoying the tall grass brushing against the lower part of their legs while they held hands and talked. Only when they came to an extremely narrow creek running through the area, did Nick stop and turn to face Ruth. He looked so serious, Ruth was half afraid of what was coming.

"What do you plan on doing once everything is settled? That is, once Jarrod secures Timothy's inheritance in the matter and puts it into the trust fund you talked to Jarrod about?" Nick asked remembering how Ruth had talked to Jarrod just that morning. She'd told his eldest brother that she thought it would be best if the majority of the money was put into a secure trust fund. Ruth had also suggested that if-heaven forbid-something should happen to her brother-they should already have something in place that made it impossible for Kyle to inherit any of the money.

Ruth never felt so torn in her life. A part of her wanted to go back and live with her Uncle Jim and get to know him better; the other part wanted to stay in Stockton. After all, it would be kind of hard to continue being friends with Nick, or any of the Barkleys for that matter, if they were in California and she was in Nevada. "I might go back to Abbottsville; Uncle Jim did say Timothy and I were welcome back. Though, I might look at Colorado too. I fell in love with it while I was there. I haven't really decided for sure." Ruth started to turn away only to find Nick turning her back around and looking at her with such love and concern, it shook her to the very center

"Would you think about staying in Stockton?" Nick ran his fingers down the side of her face. "More specifically would do you think about continuing living on the ranch as my wife? I promise I'd do my best to provide for both you and Timmy. And," Nick said as he couldn't help but chuckle, "I know for a fact that Heath wouldn't mind having Timmy calling him Uncle-even if that wouldn't be technically true."

"I…I…" Hesitation showed in Ruth's eyes; she was torn by the feelings inside her.

Nick, who could see the war going on inside Ruth and understood the hesitation, covered her mouth with his fingers as he smiled wider. "I only asked that you think about it, not that you answer me right away. I may not be the most patient man, but for this I will wait. I want you to be sure either way before you agree to anything." Nick removed his fingers and lowered his head and pulled her to him as he did so, an action Ruth did not fight. "I love you," he whispered before kissing her softly on the lips.

~oOo~

"Timothy?" Ruth stood in the smaller room that Victoria had told her about when she and Timothy arrived; the Barkleys had indeed turned it into a bedroom for the young boy. He stood near the room's small window with his back to her. She wasn't sure if he had heard her, or if he was so lost in thought that he was totally unaware she'd even entered the room.

"I heard you." Timothy, who still wished it was Heath his mother was courting, pressed his face against the window and heard Heath's words repeat themselves once more as he did so. "Don't beat a dead horse…" Timothy also heard Heath say "Don't have to be your pa to have you help me on the ranch…" The two had been fishing with the family, and he and Heath had been standing near some trees when he'd said the words to Timothy. Now the boy realized he'd have to let go of any thoughts he had about Heath being his new father. "Do you love him? I mean, do you really love Nick enough to marry him? You haven't known him that long, and he's so loud, says what's on his mind, even if he's flat out wrong and has to take his words back later." Timothy added after a few silent moments.

Did she love Nick? That was a question Ruth had asked herself more than once since Nick had made his proposal. Yes, she enjoyed his company and, naturally, she was eternally grateful for how he was standing by her through this mess. "I don't care if he's loud." Ruth answered as she walked up beside her brother. "It doesn't bother me. And," she leaned against the wall and gazed upon Timothy. "It's nice to know to what's on his mind. I've spent too many years having to guess what people around me were thinking as it is. I don't need to find myself trying to make such guesses in my own home."

"So," Timothy turned away from the window and leaned against the wall. "If the two of you marry, and I am calling you mama, do I have to call him Father? Or," he looked downwards, "do I have to start calling you Ruth instead? And like I asked, do you love him?" He knew she was his sister, but he didn't care. She was the only mother he knew, and he didn't want to change what he was calling her.

"I'm mama to you, always will be. What you will call Nick is something that will be between the two of you." Only after she'd spoken did Ruth realize she'd used the words 'you will' and 'will be' in her sentence. Timothy caught it too as his head shot up and he studied Ruth's face. Forgetting entirely about his question to her about love, Timothy, for the first time in a few years, snapped rudely at his sister. "Why did you ask me what I thought if you've already made up your mind?"

Before Ruth could defend herself, Nick was standing in the doorway glaring at Timothy. "Ruth was only treating you with respect like, from what I can tell, she's been doing all along. Now, you can apologize to your 'mother' or you and I can have a conversation of our own." Nick's eyes bore into Timothy as the words were spoken.

Timothy stared at Nick as he realized Nick was not only very serious, but that- when Nick said 'conversation'- he wasn't talking about words. Timothy also knew Nick was right. Ruth had been good to him, and this time wasn't any different.

"I'm sorry, mama." He then said he'd accept whatever she decided. Afterwards, he asked to be excused, something Ruth was more than happy to do.

Once Timothy was out of the room Nick, who had heard what Ruth said, walked over to Ruth and wrapped his arms around her. "I'll do my best to make sure you're never sorry if you become my wife."

Ruth pulled out of Nick's embrace and walked over to the window, gazing out at nothing particular. After a moment of awkward silence, she began talking. "Are you sure Nick? I mean, for the past ten years I've been so focused on raising Timothy, keeping us together," she shook her head and as she rubbed her forehead. "As you've witnessed for yourself, I have no tact and," she shrugged her shoulders while giving him a sad smile. "Try as I might I can't seem to connect very well with people, though I did have a pleasant enough conversation with your mother and sister at lunch…even though I know they wished I'd loosen up more."

"You're doing fine." Nick smiled and assured her.

Ruth sighed, knowing she needed to tell Nick exactly how she felt, and what she was looking for when it came to marriage. "Mama's Aunt May and Uncle Herman were married for forty years before she passed away. People said that they had a very good marriage." Ruth turned around and looked at Nick. "Great Aunt May's journal said the two had learned to love each other in spite of the fact she liked him a lot, even loved him to a degree, but did not marry him for love. She said she was tired and wanted a good companion, and that Herman took a chance on her. Nick," Ruth's lower lip quivered a bit as she added, "I like you a lot, even love you to a degree only like Aunt May, I'm not head over heels in love with you. I'm not even really sure what deep love should feel like. My first marriage was a mistake and I've too been scared and worried about Timothy, to give love a chance. Right or wrong, what I am is tired. At this point, all I want a good companion who I know I can trust and will give me time to learn to love him with all my heart. I know I can trust you, Nick, but I would have to learn to love you even more than I do now. Are you really willing to take a chance on me knowing that?" She knew there would be many that would condemn her for entering a marriage with Nick-or anyone else for that matter-after what she'd just said. They'd say she was settling for less than she could have-or that Nick was only marrying her out of pity. She wasn't going to waste her time arguing with those 'others'; she was simply telling Nick the truth, as she had always done, and let him decide. "Wouldn't you prefer someone who is madly in love with you from the beginning? Someone," she bit her lip again and then said, "someone who has better people skills than I do?"

After all the women he'd known that had strung him along, pretending to be just that…madly in love with him, Nick found it refreshing to have someone be so blatantly honest with him, and he loved Ruth even more for it. Besides, he knew many couples who had married for many different reasons and had anywhere from good marriages to outstanding ones. "We all have skills in various areas and on various levels. Don't worry about it. Just know this…I love you, faults and all. I'll take the chance if you will." Nick began beaming from ear to ear as he stepped forward and, wrapping his arms around Ruth, pulled her to him.

"I will." Ruth said as she rested her head against Nick's chest; he tightened his hold on her just a little. She then asked softly, "What will your family say when we tell them the news? I mean, I won't lie and try to get them to believe anything that isn't so. It wouldn't be right."

"I wouldn't have it any other way." Nick smiled as he kissed the top of her head. "If they have a problem with it, I'll deal with them; you don't worry about it." He continued holding her for a good ten minutes before the two walked out of the room to break the news to the family.