The Witcher: Part XVI
TWIlight
Previously, on The Witcher:
Team Witcher have arrived in the economics world!
In this world, there is no magic or magick without paying for it! And now Team Witcher are under attack from Capitalist McMoney, who has magickek in this world due to him being so rich!
How will our heroes make it out of this predicament?
McMoney raised his arms in preparation to vaporise Team Witcher. And then he flicked his wrists, in a motion that was supposed to kill them all.
But in that split second, Ciri reached into her bag and pulled out 100gp, allowing her to buy a magick barrier.
"You're not the only one with money!" said Ciri. And then Ciri tossed out some more money, granting her a more youthful body and magick powers.
Iorverth and Lady Feudalism and Geralt looked in amazement.
"This cannot be," said McMoney. And then Ciri and McMoney dueled.
"You cannot win," said McMoney. "I am richer than you."
McMoney threw a bunch of money at the ground Ciri was standing on.
It turned out that ground was a supply-demand curve. And by throwing money at the ground, demand increased. Hence supply decreased.
And the ground collapsed beneath Ciri.
Knowing she was likely defeated, Ciri cast some magick to send up some smoke. And Team Witcher departed from the battlefield of economics.
They wandered around the economics realm for a while.
After a few hours, they found themselves hopelessly lost in the abyss of economics.
Nothing made sense.
Normal logic did not apply.
And then, Iorverth, with his hawklike eyesight, spotted something in the distance.
"A town!" he said happily. And it was a town.
It was quite a marvellous town, with beautiful architecture that looked like a lot of money had been spent on it. Well, at least it looked good from the outside.
When they entered the town, the architecture and overall atmosphere seemed to physically shift around them.
"This economics realm is weird," remarked Geralt.
According to the sign, the town was called 'Money'. There were homeless people lying in rags on the streets. There were lines of quite nice looking houses.
Iorverth peered into one.
It was empty.
Geralt peered into another.
It was also empty.
It soon became apparent that every house was empty yet everybody was homeless. They asked one old man who was on the street what was going on.
"It's the TWI," he said. "They own everything in this town! They've monopolised everything!"
And then the man collapsed and fainted.
Iorverth quickly checked on him. "Dehydration. But there's nothing we can do."
As they moved forward, the dark streets got lighter. Advertising for this TWI started to appear on every wall of every house.
"I think we've arrived in the TWIlight zone," said Lady Feudalism. At the end of the street they found a massive palace.
On it, were the letters TWI:
The Water Institute
Team Witcher walked inside the building. There was a large amount of essential healthcare products inside, as well as essential foods and water.
"Hello, would you like to buy some water?" asked a salesman who approached Team Witcher.
"I think this lot have monopolised water," said Lady Feudalism.
"But water is a need, not a want! You can't monopolise needs!" said Geralt, with his rudimentary knowledge of economics.
"I want to talk to your boss," said Geralt to the salesman.
"I am the boss of this place," said the salesman. "I own The Water Institute, the town of Money and basically all of the economics realm."
And then his disguise disappeared.
"It's me again!" said Capitalist McMoney. "And there's no escape this time."
McMoney rose into the air with magickek and started shooting economics lightning at Team Witcher using his vast stores of money.
Ciri attempted to fight back, but she was hit by the lightning. The strain of the economics on Ciri was so much that she had to use all the rest of her money to prevent her from being vaporised.
And then she fell down to the ground, an old woman once again.
"Now, you shall die," said McMoney. And he shot a final bolt of economics at them.
But Geralt, the quickest thinker, realised how he could defeat McMoney.
In that instant, Geralt pulled out his sword, the golden Smite, and blocked the bolt of economics. Gold being the resource to which all currency is tethered, absorbed the bolt of economics.
Supercharged with economics, Geralt leapt into the air, and thrust Smite into McMoney's chest.
McMoney fell to the ground, horribly injured (but not dead).
"You should have killed him," said Ciri.
"Killing is wrong," said Geralt righteously.
And then he used the residual economics energy to open a gate back to the social world. They walked through the gate, back into the social realm, on the other side of McMoney's wall.
And then the gate closed.
"Glad that's over," said Lady Feudalism. "My brother can be quite irritating at times."
The sky was beginning to get dark.
Iorverth checked his watch.
"It's only 3pm. Why is it dark already?"
He looked to the sun. It was covered by a black smudge of stuff.
"What's that?" asked Iorverth.
Geralt, with his magick restored in the social world, magnified the image with magick.
And then they saw what was coming for them:
An army of Heinrich Himmlers and Nazi Elf Draugr.
Geralt swore.
TO BE CONTINUED
IN
THE WITCHER: PART XVII
A DANCE WITH DRAGONS