Ch. 30

JJ could tell that Nick was debating about what he wanted to say to her. He was still trying to figure out the identity of the man whose name was in code on the list. JJ could also tell that he wanted to know why she wouldn't allow her family up here. Nick had been looking like that since the night in the containment hospital room when she had told him he knew the identity of the person whose name was written in code. They had gotten married yesterday and Nick was being overprotective, now that they were living together and were officially married and all. JJ sighed as she crossed her arms in front of her, feeling her wedding band dig into her finger and the scratch as the stone from the engagement ring Nick had insisted he buy for her, on her arm. She was worried that he was going to get upset with her for not just telling him the information but she was worried that if she told him what he wanted to know that he wouldn't believe her anyway.

"We are married now." Nick said softly as he got up and knelt in front of her.

"Yes we are. I believe that was what those vows, that dress, and the whole cake and reception was about yesterday." JJ teased him with a smug look on her face.

"I wish Warrick could have been there." Nick said with a haunted look.

Warrick was getting better. He was still recovering in a hospital bed, in protective custody, but he was starting to take a turn for the better.

"I know. I could tell that you missed having him there." JJ said softly as she held her hands out for Nick to take.

Nick stood up and then grabbed her hands, pulling her to her feet. He pulled her so that her body was flush against his and he leaned down and kissed her deeply and hard on the lips. His hands tangled in her hair as he held her close to him. He ran his tongue along her lower lip and heard her moan at the feeling and he smirked against her mouth. "I want to make love to you." He whispered.

"What's stopping you?" JJ asked him arching an eyebrow.

"Nothing." Nick said as he picked her up and carried her towards the hallway and then down to their bedroom. JJ was giggling as they made their way to their room, but she was trying to keep quiet because their daughter was asleep in her room.

The next morning JJ woke up and blinked her eyes as the sunlight filled the room. She groaned and closed them before opening them again and glancing at the clock on the nightstand. She saw that it was nearly noon and she sat up straight really fast. She should have been up hours ago taking care of Ella. Nick had kept her up most of the night and by the time she had fallen asleep this morning she had been so tired she couldn't keep her eyes open. Nick must have decided to allow her to sleep in. JJ was supposed to start work tomorrow, this would be her last day off since she had left FHI and had been officially transferred onto the force at LVPD as a detective. She had offered to be a patrol cop, thinking it might be fun to just work patrol for a while, but the Sheriff had decided she was overqualified for that position and she would be better suited in the investigation division. She was officially assigned to the serial killer case as an LVPD detective.

She slowly climbed out of bed and grabbed some clothing, heading for the master bathroom and the shower. After she had showered and gotten dressed, doing her hair and brushing her teeth, she made her way into the living room and smiled as she saw Nick and Ella playing together on the floor.

"Mommy!" Ella shouted when she saw JJ. She immediately got up and ran to her.

JJ had been shocked at how quickly it seemed that Ella had adjusted to calling her mommy and accepting her as her mother. JJ hadn't been sure whether or not the toddler would be all right with having a new mother but she seemed to be able to take it all in stride. JJ was sure that later on in life she and Nick were going to have to pay for some serious therapy, she was sure that the horrific images and memories were locked inside Ella's head, that for the moment she had found a way to block them from bothering her or keeping her awake at night. But JJ knew from expierence that memories wouldn't stay locked away forever, no matter how much you wished that they would.

"Catherine is coming by to pick her up. Apparently Lindsay took a shine to our little girl and was wondering if Ella could go with them to the zoo. Considering we are newlyweds, Catherine thought it would give us some time alone." Nick informed her.

JJ saw that Ella was all dressed and that a bag was all set full of things for the toddler. JJ and Nick had noticed that Ella wasn't yet potty trained and they had started to try and work on that, but at the moment she was still in diapers. JJ nodded her head as Ella babbled on about something, using words that you couldn't quite understand. JJ realized that since Ella had been kidnapped and probably locked away by her captors, she most likely hadn't been exposed to many kids or even to the language necessary to develop her brain properly. They had found some neat kids places that would most likely help her along, but it was not going to be something they allowed her into until they took care of the serial killer.

He was getting angry, he threw the knife at the picture he had managed to snag. It was the wedding photo of JJ and Nick, so they had finally gotten married. He had known that they would find some way to get married and he had known they would find a way to be together, they had always been together back in Texas, why should now as adults be any different. He was getting more and more angry and he stalked over to the wall and yanked the picture off of it and tore it into pieces. He threw them in the fire that he had going in the fireplace. He needed to find a way to take care of this before things got out of hand. He had made a promise to someone that he would. He had been playing games, killing the others as a serial killer so that when he took care of the one he was really supposed to kill, they would not be able to trace it back to the person who wanted her out of the way. JJ was the victim he was supposed to take out, and JJ was the victim he was targeting from now on.

Sure he could go out and kill a few more innocent people, but that would make it possible for the Stokes to keep their guard up. If they kept their guard up then he would never be able to get close to her. He needed them to relax, to think he had moved on or gone into hiding and wouldn't be around to come after them anymore. He needed them to get back to the way they were before the killings had started and there was only one way to ensure that they did that, he had to stop killing the innocent people and wait to kill the one he needed to take out of the way. He was trying to decide the best way to kill her, the best way to end her life. He had been asked to make sure it was slow and painful, that she understood why she was being killed but not who had wanted her dead, in case she somehow survived. He would make sure she didn't survive, he would make sure she suffered.

JJ was nervous as she finally pulled out the box, the box she had not opened or looked at in so long. Inside were memories she wanted to let go of and memories she longed to forget. She had not shared any of this with Nick but now that she was his wife and they had a daughter together and wanted more children, and they were actively trying for another baby, she felt it was time. She would have to reveal the identity of the man whose name was written in code and she would have to tell him why her family wasn't welcome here.

"Hey, what's that?" Nick asked as he walked over and sat across from her.

"His name is Michael Rokowsky." JJ said in a whisper.

"The man who was, what, five years older than I was? He was the one that our dads always wanted us hanging out with. He is a great guy, I don't think he is our killer." Nick said with a laugh.

"I was kidnapped when I was a child." JJ stunned him. "I don't know my real name but I know that the people who raised me, aren't my real family. They admitted to taking me, the day they beat me within an inch of my life. They were angry, I told them I was in love with you, they wanted me to marry Michael. He was there, he helped them beat me. I was in a coma for three months and when I came to, I found out I had been raped. The doctor said it had most likely happened when I was unconscious. Michael was the lead suspect but they had no evidence and my family refused to admit to who had done it. Without any proof that I had been kidnapped and that the adoption papers they suddenly produced were forged, I couldn't get my real name or have them arrested. My so called father bragged about how he had watched me get raped, after the statue of limitations had been up and there was no way anyone could be prosecuted for the rape."

Nick was staring at her in shock. Of all the things he had thought she was going to tell him, this was not what he had expected. Michael had been his hero, he had wanted to be just like him. Now as Nick sat there, he hoped that he never saw that man face to face again, because if he did then he might forget that he had a badge. It made sense now, the fact that JJ wanted to believe that Michael was somehow behind the murders. He wanted to believe that there was something they could put him in jail for to, but that didn't mean that it was true.

"Just because you want to be able to lock him in jail, it doesn't mean we can falsely accuse him." Nick said softly.

"I know that, it's the reason his name is in code. I have a feeling about this one Nick. When I was released from the hospital and victim's rights group took me in, got me away from my so called family, I was warned that I would be killed one day, in a brutal way. I was warned that no one would know that I was the target that there would be no evidence and no one would know the real reason behind my death. They told me it would be slow and painful and that I would be begging for forgiveness and mercy, unless I gave in and agreed to do everything they wanted. I haven't spoken to those people since the group took me away and kept me hidden from them." JJ informed him. "Your father saw me in the hospital and I was to ashamed to tell him everything. He asked me to tell him what I remembered about what happened and I told him I couldn't do that."

"My father would be on your side in this one." Nick told her. "I want to call them and tell them everything, about you and me being married, about Ella and about what happened back then. Let me call them." He said in a pleading tone.

JJ wasn't sure how to respond or what to say. She wanted Nick to be happy and she knew he was close with his family and he loved them. She was torn in different directions and she wasn't sure where to go from there. She was so lost and so confused, but the one thing she did notice, Nick was on her side and he believed her without questioning her, she now knew that he was hers and that he loved her enough to believe her no matter what it would cost him.