A/N: Hey... I'm not late at all and what a creative chapter title.

Thank you very much for all of your support, it is very much appreciated!

(I'm a little excited, I saw Mockingjay P2 on Friday and oh my word, it was so close to the book and the last line! I mean they got a few things wrong but the main essence of the book was there... it was so sad. Anyway...)

Have an interesting in a good way kind of day. Enjoy.

JAMES' P.O.V

POTTER'S COTTAGE

1ST AUGUST 1980

I'm the happiest I've ever been.

It's finally happened! Harry James Potter was born yesterday, a beautiful baby boy, my son. Lily's at home now, with Harry in her arms and the cat on her lap, Padfoot sat beside her. From the moment I set eyes on him, I loved him completely and unquestionably. He was Christened earlier today, it was quiet and hurried – only Padfoot came along. Dumbledore thinks we're in danger (no surprise there), so we're lying low as it were. A few people are coming to see him over the next few weeks. Bathilda has visited already – she loves him almost as much as Lily and I. Padfoot… he adores Harry. He was with Lily and me at the hospital and he's been here ever since – fawning over him incessantly.

I had my worries about being a father but they're all gone now. He's perfect, I mean he cries a lot and he's smelly and snotty and all that but mostly he's adorable. Lily hasn't stopped smiling all day, the years of pain and war that were always marked on her face have softened – she looks so much calmer, so much more at ease.

Moony is currently in Scotland, held up with business for the Order but he's getting down here as soon as he can. I've not heard from Wormtail but I assume he's visiting soon, he knows he's always welcome. Lily and I have discussed it in full and we've made Padfoot godfather. Padfoot's reaction was entertaining to say the least – he was holding Harry at the time and we succeeded in making him utterly speechless, he looked at us, then at Harry and then he had this look on his face, a look I'd never seen before, he was completely over the moon. He doesn't tire of Harry at all, every time Harry so much as blinks, Padfoot is impressed and feels the need to tell everyone about it. His never ending enthusiasm is amusing but also understandable. To me, Harry is an angel.

The doorbell sounds, Harry gurgles, Padfoot beams at him – like he's just succeeded in casting a Patronus charm. With much care and caution, I open the door; it's Moony of course.

"Hey Prongs, I got your message. How's Lily? How's Harry?"

Lily comes out into the hall, Harry looks at Moony with interest, or at least as much interest as a new-born baby can have. Moony smiles at him; Harry opens his mouth and closes it again, as if also trying to smile.

"Hello," Moony says softly, taking Harry is his arms. Harry lies there, completely absorbed in looking at Moony's face. Babies have very penetrating stares.

Harry closes his eyes and promptly falls asleep. In hushed whispers, we gravitate into the living room, drinking wine and talking about Harry mostly – how sweet he is, how quiet (is that normal for babies?), how perfect… but we also talk about Hogwarts, Dumbledore, the war, Neville Longbottom (also born yesterday) and some secret Lily thinks Dumbledore is keeping from her.

"He wasn't making much eye contact with me last time we talked and I kept asking him how far he'd got with the Death Eater's plan and what our contingency plan was in case they ended up attacking the Ministry before we're able to look at recruiting some more creatures… you know how difficult it is to sway centaurs when even talking to them proves a challenge… anyway, he just kept changing the subject."

"He's very busy and probably extremely stressed – wouldn't you be in his position? The Ministry is ringing him up every few minutes for advice, he has to manage a school which has students that are corrupt inside it and he's got to try and organise us lot and fight in the war. The fact that he even has time to have a conversation with you is a miracle," Remus says quietly, so as not to wake Harry.

"I know but… something wasn't right, isn't right. I know it."

"Just leave it be, love," I say.

"Alright. I'm meeting Alice tomorrow; Molly's going to be there as well, with Ronald. I'm going to see Neville for the first time; do you guys want to come along?"

"We wouldn't want to intrude," Moony says, looking at Harry's hand which is wrapped around his thumb.

"Yes, we would," Padfoot says, swaying in his seat, already pretty drunk, "count me in. Frank will be there anyway right?"

"Yes, he will," Lily confirms.

"Okay then, that's all of us. You aren't going to be sharing birth stories are you?"

"Maybe," Lily says, smirking.

"Merlin help us all," Padfoot mutters.

"Molly's thinking of having another one."

"Another?" Padfoot exclaims, "but she's already got about ten."

"She has six children, Sirius," Lily laughs.

"Close enough," Padfoot says dismissively.

"Six children is a lot. How's Marlene doing?" Lily asks, "I haven't seen her in a while."

"Nor have I," Padfoot says.

"I assumed –"

"Yeah well she's busy," Padfoot snaps.

"Sirius? Are you alright?"

"Yes, fine. Marlene's just going through a… difficult time at the moment. You know how it is, family and all that, unity of the McKinnons, protection, Death Eaters, blood-traitors, etc."

"Are you sure you're fine?"

"Oh yes, absolutely," he says, taking a flask out of his pocket and downing it in one gulp, I have a feeling whatever's in it is stronger than the wine we've been having, "why wouldn't I be? It's not as though she's ignoring me, standing me up, doesn't want to spend time with me… then I find out my brother's dead, the cowardly bastard and then everything is just really shitty – apart from you Harry, you're not shitty at all."

"Regulus…?"

"Dead, gone, kicked the bucket, deceased," Padfoot gestures wildly at the air, clearly more than slightly drunk.

"How? When?"

"Killed by Death Eaters most likely… probably panicked when he got in over his head… knew our parents wouldn't let him back out, knew Voldemort wouldn't either. So boom, dead, gone… and now it's just me on my own, drinking away my sorrows and spending my nights with you miserable lot."

"When?"

"Last year… damn fool should have listened to me. I told him, I told him that he shouldn't but he didn't listen. Never listened to a word I said… and my parents… bet they're sorry now too. Slug Club, Quidditch team… better son," he says bitterly, taking out another flask.

"Why on earth didn't you tell us?" Lily asks indignantly.

"Didn't want to, didn't care…talking about it makes it feel real… better to numb it out with Firewhisky, pretend it never happened."

"Sirius… God, if I'd known."

"But you didn't," Padfoot says, taking a drink from his flask, "I wish I didn't know either."

"Stop that," Lily says, indicating the flask.

"We all have our ways of dealing with grief and making it go away. Prongs hexes people, you isolate yourself and so does Moony, Wormy eats and I drink. We all want to pretend whatever it is never happened. Grief's a part of life honey, and so is this Firewhisky."

"Sirius, I'm so sorry," Lily says, almost in tears.

"Me too, but there isn't shit you or I can do about it. It's all a mess, much like how I'll be in the morning."

"Has he been buried?"

"No," Padfoot snorts, "it's a little controversial. Is he a war hero or is he a coward? My parents probably think he died bravely but I did some digging… wasn't easy, not many people remembered him without a little persuasion… That's why I was away so much last year, I mean yes, the Order had me very busy but I wanted to know how he died. Such a fucking waste of a life, he could have done anything he wanted, he was bright… he knew stuff, he could do things I couldn't, I'm more attractive but he just had that air about him you know? He didn't used to be cocky… that all changed. They changed him, shaped him, and made him into a Death Eater toy. But the thing about us, us Blacks is that we can't be made to think and believe things we don't, not really… he knew, he bloody fucking well knew what he was up to and then he... By nature, Blacks aren't brave; I know that but he could have… he could have… he didn't have to… How do people change so fast? Prongs and Moony said they saw him duelling that one time on Patrols just weeks maybe even days before he died. He must have known…"

Padfoot breaks down into loud, drunken sobs. Harry stirs, and starts to cry, reaching for Padfoot. Padfoot looks up at him and he takes him from Moony, hugging Harry tight, cooing and reassuring softly. Lily puts a hand on Sirius' shoulder, he looks up at her gratefully and we sit like that, all together.

We've known each other for so many years and yet we all managed to remain ignorant to Regulus' death. I can understand why Padfoot didn't want to tell us but I just wonder… if we didn't know about something like this, then what else don't we know? What if Padfoot's hiding other things as well? We all knew about his drinking, except perhaps Lily. I hope he knows that he can trust us, that we love him and that we care about him. I don't know what's happening with Marlene and him but whatever it is, I don't want to find out about it five years from now.

LILY'S P.O.V

SEPTEMBER 1980

THE BURROW

"… and there is absolutely no reason to think that, Minerva –"

"I don't think you understand the severity of this matter Albus!"

"We can't assume it means her any more than he can."

"Yes but it said that he would choose. He would mark him as his equal! Don't you think that warrants concern?"

"Of course I do but what would you have me do? Hide them away?"

"Yes! For their safety! I can't see why –"

"Maybe you can't but think of it like this, in war sacrifices must be made, can we afford to have our best fighters hidden away for fear of this… information… reaching him?"

"You said you saw him overhear it! You know we can't trust him, Albus."

"Maybe not but he's all we have. We must trust that he will eventually see things from our point of view –"

"You can't expect him to be reasoned with!"

"Please, Minerva, I –"

"Is everything alright in here?" I ask, walking into the kitchen, watching the pair standing by the window, both flushed, clearly in the middle of something.

"Yes, yes, perfectly fine," Minerva says, forcing a smile. "Why don't you show me some photos of Harry? I was led to believe there was a slight incident with some strawberries and a tambourine?"

"Of course…" I murmur, following her into Molly's living room, my mind dizzy with thoughts.

Marlene's here, at the Burrow. Right now, she's holding Harry, Sirius isn't standing close to her but he keeps a watchful eye on Harry whilst simultaneously glaring at her. I don't know what's happening between those two. It used to be uncomfortable being in a room with them – how close they'd stand and the attraction between them, the knowing looks and the private smiles. Now it's awkward, they stand apart, don't acknowledge each other much, talk to other people, and leave parties and get-togethers at different times and usually with different people. Marlene refuses to talk about it; all I managed to get out of her was that sometimes you just 'fall out of love'. Sirius changes the subject whenever I try and talk to him about it.

Alice is also here, with Neville. Her and Frank are happy, a kind of happiness James and I share. James hasn't left my side all evening, apart from when I went to get a glass of water and ran into Minerva and Albus. That was interesting; it doesn't take much guesswork to work it out though. It's clearly about some information they know that they're worried Voldemort will find out about and that Severus already knows. It affects some of us in the Order and Minerva thinks they're in danger. If she thinks that they're going to just go into hiding, then she is very much mistaken. I spent months at home, doing nothing and it was horrible. It was worse than fighting; it amplified my fear and paranoia instead of reducing it. Besides, it's impossible to be completely safe. The Death Eaters are everywhere, infiltrating the Ministry, controlling people by the Imperius curse, their eyes are everywhere. I hate to think how much they know about us, where we are, what we're doing. Apparently Severus is a double agent but I don't believe it for a second. He isn't going to change, he's just… he will never leave Voldemort and he will never betray the Dark side. Surely Dumbledore can see that, it shouldn't be a mystery.

"Lily! How wonderful to see you," Molly comes over; hugging me tightly, "look how much he's grown in two months! They grow so fast, you should see my twins now… walking around, talking. How have you been?"

"Better, since Harry, I've been a lot better."

"I know," Molly sighs, "I know it's hard… but we stick together, yes? We're all in the same boat after all. Have you seen Neville? He's such a dear, him Harry and Ron will be friends for sure! Just imagine them in Hogwarts –"

"Hogwarts? I hadn't even thought that far ahead…"

"I hadn't, until the twins, now all I can think about is them growing up. Two years and Bill will be at Hogwarts and Charlie's eight years old now. I don't know where the time goes."

"Eight?" I think back fondly to my first meeting with Charlie.

"I know. How's James?" she asks, looking at him across the room, him and Frank are engaged in conversation, both of them occasionally erupting with laughter.

"Fine, I think. It'll be good when we can move around normally, take Harry with us, see places, do more work for the Order."

"Won't you be busy looking after Harry?"

"I think we have that covered…" I look at Sirius who has Harry in his arms and is bouncing him around, making strange noises at him. "Besides, we won't be away that much. I just want to do something."

"I do too," Molly says wistfully, "but I don't think that's possible."

"You have enough on your plate already Molly," I say, looking over to where Bill is sitting on the floor with Charlie, playing with a magical train set – occasionally they end up arguing and snatching, Percy is sitting next to Dorcas (he seems to have taken a shine to her) and the twins are running around only to be scolded by a nearby adult every so often.

"I know, sometimes I think I'm missing out. That there has to be more to life than what I've got but then I just think of my children, my husband and I don't need anything else."

"Hmm," I say, pondering that.

Could a home life be enough for me? Could I be content looking after a house and children whilst the people I loved were risking their lives? I don't know if I could be, if I could just stand back and do nothing.

We chat for a while, about such silly things – her new roses which haven't been growing well, her increasing gnome infestation and Arthur's hobby of tinkering with Muggle objects. It all feels so normal. We're all in her living room, standing around or sitting in armchairs by the fire, drinking and talking. I'm talking to Molly, Harry is safe, and James is full of life and back to the way he was in our Hogwarts years but in a good way. He laughs, he makes jokes, he socialises with ease. Alice and Frank are here, lively and ecstatic like the old days. Even Mary is here.

The back door slams, Alice Smith walks into the living room and promptly Apparates.

I haven't had a chance to talk to her all evening. At one point, I spotted her with Wormy but then he left early with Edgar Bones for something to do with the Order. Last time I saw her, she was with Remus. I wonder where he's got to and I wonder what happened. She looked upset; she won't talk to me…

Remus walks across the room to where Molly and I are standing. He pours himself a glass of vodka that happens to be on the kitchen counter beside me and Molly and swallows it. He grimaces and turns to me.

"Hey Lily."

"Hey yourself, are you alright?"

"No, not really."

"Were you with Alice?"

"Yes, yes I was, Molly do you have any more of this vodka?" he asks.

"Erm, I'll just go and check…" she walks off quickly, without a backward glance - she doesn't come back.

"You know Lily, love's kind of shit."

"Mhm-hm?"

"I don't know if you knew but I really liked Alice for quite a long time and I thought she could like me but she doesn't."

"I think you're a little bit drunk, how much alcohol have you had tonight?"

"Enough to induce me to tell Alice that I like her."

"How did she take it?"

"How'd you think?"

"What did you say exactly?"

"Oh I don't think the problem was what I said; it was more what she knows I am."

"I don't follow."

"She said she could never love a filthy half-breed like me, that I'm scum, I have no right to feel such things for her, much less express them. She said she could cope having me around, but us together? No chance. I should have known, I told myself that it would never work out, never, never, never. But somehow I hoped. Is that stupid? Yeah, I know it's stupid. I shouldn't have let myself think like that. This always happens."

"She – she really said that?"

"Yes."

"That doesn't sound like Alice."

"It sounds exactly like Alice."

"She must have – she wouldn't have –"

"Why don't I ever learn?"

"Remus, it's not your fault. Alice… I don't even know what's happening with her anymore but I assure you, you are not scum."

"I feel like it," he says glumly.

"I mean it, Remus. No one has the right to tell you that you are any less than you are. What you are is compassionate, kind, generous, intelligent and brave. That's what the people who matter most to you think of when they think of you. If someone asked me describe you, that last thing I'd think of would be 'werewolf'. That's just one part of you; don't let yourself be defined by it."

"Hey," Marlene comes over.

"Hey Mar, tell Remus he's not worthless."

"You're not worthless," she says adamantly.

"Can we talk about something else other than my pathetic love life?"

"Alice?" Mar asks, eyebrows raised, I nod and she sighs.

"It's not a big deal," Remus says.

"Nor should it be, don't take it too hard. She's been head over heels for Wormtail for ages."

"Wormtail?" I nearly drop my glass.

"Yeah, haven't you noticed the way that they look at each other?"

"I told Prongs! I told him and I told Padfoot too and nobody believed me."

"Sorry, maybe that was supposed to be a secret," Mar says.

"She never told me."

"She didn't tell me either until I caught the two of them together."

"I've missed you, Mar and I've missed Alice too."

"I don't miss Alice," Marlene says briskly.

"You don't? Isn't she your best friend?" Remus asks.

"She was but best friends don't lie to your face, best friends don't sleep with your boyfriend and best friends definitely don't call you a whore in front of your family."

"She slept with Sirius?"

"Oh didn't she just…" Mar says venomously, "apparently they were both drunk and it didn't mean anything. Suppose that was Sirius' way of saying it was over, not that I gave a shit. I was angry, still am but I've moved on. Rather quickly actually, quicker than I thought. I refuse to speak to him."

"Why is it people only ever tell me things when they're drunk?"

"I'm not that drunk," Mar says unconvincingly.

"I beg to differ," I say as she sways dangerously.