Day Fourteen, Morning

Trojan Reid, District 3, 15

Killing was so much harder than it looked.

I always imagined it to be easy - assuming you could beat your competitor, that was. Once that struggle was over all you had to do was stick something sharp in them, or beat them, or do something similarly gruesome. Then once you'd done that, it was over. You could detach yourself. I'd never expected it to be so much harder. I hadn't predicted that it was a poison that lurked in your mind. I hadn't anticipated the guilt.

The morning light peered through the clouds, which were slowly making way for a blue sky. I turned around a little bit to avoid the light hurting my eyes. As soon as Seb had dropped dead I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep. And considering I needed all the energy I could muster, it kind of sucked, because I needed to survive. But somehow I felt wide awake. I tried thinking of anything: home, political drama or even the vapid TV shows I despised but sometimes watched when they were the only things on television. But Sebastian was haunted me. I could only think of his eyes, the way my blade slipped into his back, the way he dropped and - most disturbingly - his final words.

It was hard to trace how it had all gone wrong. As much as I denied it, Seb and I had some kind of friendship, right? There was something there. I think I cared a little bit, and he once did. Where did it all change? Whose fault was it? I may have betrayed Seb, but I wouldn't have betrayed him until the final two if he didn't screw up so badly. If Seb hated me for betraying him, surely he was misguided?

Or maybe I truly was a bad person. I mean, I'd acknowledged that my whole life. Stealing wasn't exactly the moral thing to do or the nice thing to do, and I'd been doing it my whole life. I saw things others had that I wanted and took them with no remorse... And then I had took Seb's life with no remorse. There were so many people who I had probably upset through my whole life, using my survival as an excuse to do whatever I wanted with little forethought. I did it to survive, but when I truly thought about the pain I wondered if survival was really worth it...

It made the situation worse that even I empathised with the pain of losing a loved one. If I lost my parents, or if my parents lost me, I knew it would be soul shattering. And yet we were much less emotional and much more independent than most other families. Seb's family probably felt the pain I imagined with one-hundred times the intensity. How could they live if they felt something so awful? Had I simultaneously stuck the blade into all of their backs?

I wiped my eyes, expecting tears despite the dryness that had surrounded them. I had virtually been programmed to not cry. And yet for the first time I hurt inside. This was not a pain I was used to. I could take being kicked, punched and cut (and indeed my wounds still hurt, particularly the ones Seb had inflicted). Even the quick but extreme pain I felt when Mirane pushed me off the balcony was less agonising.

Staggering along a broken corridor, I found my worldview under scrutiny. And it had all happened in a split second; the moment I had killed Seb I knew that the state of the world was majorly screwed up. I had always known that, and accepted it, but now I realised that I couldn't lie around and remain apathetic this whole time.

But I wasn't the guy who would start a revolution or something. I didn't even think a revolution could be possible when the Capitol was this titanic, indestructible entity. It had been tried so many times before and had always failed.

I didn't know how I felt or what to do. Maybe being apathetic was what was best for me, and being selfish was the best option when selflessness did more harm than good in this crazy world. I rushed down an empty stairway, realising that the only thing I should focus on was winning. Once I had survived, I could then evaluate my options. Though I didn't think there any were options bar surviving and living some kind of meaningless existence as a Capitolian puppet. And that was terrifying.

Pullox Shimmers, District 1, 18

The church that I was once in was extremely beautiful. It was surrounded by sculptures crafted by artists of great talent, flickering candles that rested on platinum candelabras and stained glass windows which allowed coloured light to illuminate the otherwise dark room. A couple of hours ago it had also had modest wooden pews, which were uncomfortable but quaint. But after some hard work which had left me exhausted I finally managed to chop them all away. Now there was no evidence they existed bar a graveyard of splintered wood which had been piled into the corner.

I would utilise that wood, but the once cluttered church would now have room for action. I also needed to move a lot of the decor that filled up the bottom floor of the large church. I glanced at the bland, square tiles at my feet and smirked. Step one of my plan had been complete, though there were hours more work to be done. Now what could I do for step two?

I moved to the stairway, taking note of the regal red carpet that had been rolled down its walnut frame. When I reached the second floor of the large church I noted that it was similar in structure; large corridors were cordoned off by a balcony, giving me insight to the now empty first floor beneath. I smirked down at it for a few seconds. I definitely hoped nobody came into my cozy little domain prematurely. I would still have some preparation against them, but it wouldn't be quite so magnificent.

Suddenly there was a rattling noise behind me. Jumping, I turned around and noted movement hidden in the dark corners. I moved towards it hesitantly, brandishing my gun. I couldn't help but be intrigued and slightly baffled by what was held in the cage.

Humanoid looking things, like tiny little aliens. They were a little bigger than the size of my hand and hovered in the air with the support of skeletal looking wings. . At first they seemed gruesomely cute, like dark fairies of a sort, but when they immediately snapped and tried to bite at me I realised they were savage little mutts. Judging by the number of them that rattled around in their cage, and the sharp teeth and claws they displayed, they would be worthy opponents.

I think I recognised them from my brief tenure at the muttation station during training. Scratching my chin, I wondered how I could utilise them. It would be such a shame if their cage was opened and a poor tribute had to deal with these mutts, wouldn't it?

After thinking up of some fun things to do and placing multiple devices around the room, I ventured back down the large stairway. I would return upstairs later to tweak my plans a little bit more. While I had created a wonderful battleground, I hadn't created something entertaining enough - and I don't think I had made anything that could take down Lexie. I needed more, just like the audience needed more. I made my way to a wooden door on the lower floor of the church. It was the only doorway within the building, and I had yet to explore it.

I was shocked that it wasn't locked, but I immediately wondered what the spiral staircase before me led to. Judging by the narrowness of it all, it led up the tower of the church. I was almost tired out after rushing up it for five minutes, but when I reached the top I was pleasantly surprised by what I saw:

A large room, surrounded by large bells. Some of the bells were plain, but many of them - especially the largest bell that dominated the centre of the room - were made from precious metals. They were adorned with glittering jewels or colourful baroque patterns. All the disconnected tidbits of plans or traps came into my head when I noticed the multiple bells before me. With the mechanisms I had stolen from the robots, I could perhaps do something interesting. Something unprecedented that nobody in the Games had thought of before.

Something that could destroy an unsuspecting Lexie.

Judging by the mechanisms, it seemed you pulled the string and that would knock the bells against each other, which made the sound fill the arena. Because nobody had been in this part of the arena, the bells had been silent. Now the bells would toll through the arena when the time was right, summoning a vengeful Lexie who would know that I would be here. Those who thought the feast would be the highlight of the Games would be comfortably proven wrong now I was truly at the helm.

I peered out of a large, circular window, one that looked very similar to the one Jericho fell through. I could see the Palace in the distance - it looked so white and pretty, and you couldn't see that it had been destroyed. I just needed a few more hours to complete by plans...

Then the bells would ring.

Alexandria Tarsus, District 1, 15

Self doubt was dangerous. And it always hit you when you felt on top of the world and least expected it to rear its ugly face.

That was something I had learned from a young age. When I first got into dancing, I learnt that no amount of preparation could ever make the nerves diminish. If I spent hours a day practicing and could dance with my eyes closed in perfect sync I would still feel nervous for the impending audition or show. Usually it would be okay, but my self doubt would often trip me up and would make all those hours of practice be for nothing. It wasn't that I didn't know, it was that my nerves simply got the better of me and my brain was only taken up by raw emotion instead of the stuff I actually needed to know.

That self doubt was returning, but this time it was more crippling and more intense. I could afford to flunk up on a dance. Worst was that I would lose a dancing role I wanted, or be the laughing stock of the audience for the next half an hour, or at worst flunk at a competition and wait for another year before I could even hope to win anything. They were upsetting, but they were nothing compared to the thought of losing my life or the thought of letting the Capitol continue with their reign of terror. Both of those were alternatives I simply couldn't stand.

And then there was the self doubt on whether I was actually doing this. Was I putting my life on the line for... nothing? And even if I changed my mind I simply couldn't make a u-turn. I had made my anti-Capitol statement. I had killed three people. And though at the time I felt so certain for it, it wasn't beginning to settle right. But what could I do? Say that I flunked and maybe promise to do things a little different?

... Fuck. That wasn't an option.

I exhaled, trying to keep my mind clear. A tear still rolled down my cheek. It wasn't a point of turning back, if I turned back I would be doing things wrong. The Capitol was evil, and if I wasn't going to stand up to them who would? Who else had a chance? The Gamemakers' recent inactivity had only convinced me that they had no way to stop me. I couldn't stop when I was at my peak, that would be stupid.

Plus those soldiers had it coming. They were working for an oppressive regime, and they attacked me first. Was I supposed to be friendly when they were actively trying to kill me? Honora had it coming. I saw what she did to Lia. Being friendly to her wasn't an option, and after all the hatred and torment she had inflicted on me and others, she deserved all the pain that she experienced. I felt anger swell up inside me just thinking of her.

I was in the right. Pullox had it coming too. He was innately a rotten person to the core. He had gotten off on torturing people mentally... I hadn't necessarily planned to torture him, but even if I did it was just tit-for-tat, it was justified. And then the Capitol people would suffer for contributing to the most systemically brutal system I could think of. Everything I was doing was right, and there was definitely no turning back from it.

I glanced up into the now blue sky, inhaling in the crisp morning air. The grounds were empty and the Palace felt so eery. In the background, a bird sang away happily.

The Gamemakers had no way of taking me down, that had been established. But their inactivity was still worrying. What had caused them to be so placid? There were no mutts, no disasters, nothing. It was almost as if a bomb had struck and wiped them out. I thought today would be the Games' final day - and hopefully it would be - but it felt like even if I was dead the finale would not happen today, and that it was for another day...

A bell rang out in the background and I immediately turned towards the building from which the source of the noise came from. It was almost as if all my questions had been answered in a split second, though it wasn't the Gamemakers reaching out to me, and it wasn't going to be the Gamemakers who would progress the Games.

It was Pullox.

Marx Nystalgia, President

"She's in here?"

"Yes, sir."

I smiled and turned to each bodyguard in turn.

"Wonderful," I said. "I was so glad she was transported so aptly, and in one piece too of course," I would deal with her myself, and I specifically ordered that a scratch wouldn't even be on her. "And how is the District?"

"It's been difficult," the Head Peacekeeper admitted, walking down the dimly lit corridor of The Hive with me. "The citizens have naturally given us much unrest... They aren't as submissive as the other Districts," he explained. "But with over five-hundred public executions after the initial war, we have gotten most of the rebellious citizens captured. Many have been thrown into concentration camps. The District needs a lot of repair work done, especially if we are to harness on their industry, but all is well. The Panemian flag has been raised in their Parliament."

District Thirteen, who had developed a powerful weapons industry and nuclear industry, and had managed to sustain enough resources to feed their own people. That was definitely something the Capitol could exploit.

"How much damage is there?"

"Six billion credits," he explained. "Your economic, foreign and District advisors have been suggesting that the Capitol's subsidies into public parks and malls could probably be invested into-"

"No," I dismissed. "District Twelve have apparently had a pension fund for the last few years," I paused. "Seize that money from their mayor. That would pay much more handsomely."

"Yes, but the citizens of District Twelve-"

"Are irrelevant," I interjected. "District Twelve citizens have no political power. Capitolians at least manage to have representation, their opinions matter more. The Capitolian's discontent of the state of their public parks or their arts funding or whatever irrelevant things they enjoy mean so much more to the government than District Twelve's poor starving. If there's one thing that can be taught through history, it's that the rich are much more listened to, even if their needs are so much more trivial," I smiled. "Are we understood?"

"Of course, Sir..." He looked tentative.

But who was he to argue with me? I was the President who had simultaneously stopped the largest growing rebellion in over a century and the aggression of a foreign nation which was aided with another foreign nation. It was a feat many thought was impossible as my enemies grew in size, strength and numbers. They thought I would be the last Nystalgia to govern Panem when I seemed to react almost indifferently; they thought my attention was invested into trivial things.

Which was all a political act to dupe my enemies. And it worked. While they thought I lounged in my office, or watched the Hunger Games, I had used secret intelligence to intercept the rebels communication. This allowed us to crush many of their factions both in and out of the Capitol, whilst capturing and killing one of their leaders (Olga Pierce) in the process. And the rebels were stupid enough to contact District Thirteen - which led us in turn to intercept District Thirteen's plans.

They thought they would ambush us on the outskirts of the Capitol, but we ambushed them. We led a good defensive campaign which meant they didn't even get a hundred miles near the Capitol. We then invaded their District and took over at the most critical period. Even all their armies combined, supplemented artificially with advanced technology, could not take us out.

There were losses, of course. They had been a challenge for the army, the rebels had managed to bomb many critical sites in District Four, and they had almost unleashed nuclear weapons on our city. But it was a dying attack. And the nuclear attack didn't even happen. We had taken over their nuclear stations and threatened to bomb them, wiping out their District, before they could unleash a fatal attack. We also had a nuclear militia poised to strike. Their weak President didn't have the courage to press the button, because she knew it would cause her cause so much harm than good.

And that was saying something, considering District Thirteen was no longer an autonomous nation. The rebellion had been reduced from a large paramilitary to a mere fringe movement.

I faced the President in question. Pictures of her in intelligence reports showed her with make-up on, neat hair, a respectable suit. Now she was dressed in orange. She looked mildly beaten, but was generally squeaky clean for death. She was stood in front of the electrochemical execution chair which had killed Olga Pierce only days ago. A leader of the rebellion and the leader of an enemy District killed together so little apart, possibly on the same chair.

"I hope your journey was comfortable," I said to her as I strolled onto the stage where she was standing. The only members of the audience were a few Peacekeepers who carried large weapons. My bodyguards followed me hesitantly. "When I heard they seized you, my apparent nemesis, I had to make sure you were whisked here safe and sound."

"It's not safe and sound if I'm going to die," she said indifferently.

"Hm, perhaps you're right," I decided to taunt her. "But your District - or my District - will be safe and sound under my control. I could probably give it to much more security than you could, to save it from foreign invasions..."

"At least I'm not a tyrant," she spat at my feet.

I held out my hand before my bodyguards gutted her like a fish. "My, my, you are a hypocrite," I smirked. "I wonder why the rebels even co-operated with you. You both didn't exactly share the same views. You suppress the freedom of the press and punish political dissidents probably much more intensely than I did," I smirked at the President's ashamed reaction. "Freedom and liberty hardly flourished in your District, did it?" I jibed, enjoying her reaction. "At least your citizens all enjoyed equality. They suffered and toiled equally for your political-"

Her punch was intercepted by the weeping faced bodyguard on my right.

"Did somebody not chain this rabid dog?" I asked.

"You requested she not be handcuffed," a Peacekeeper in the audience said. He was right.

"I-I-" she panted as the tragic faced bodyguard proceeded to pin her hands at her back, making her face twist in pain. It was almost as if she didn't know resistance was futile as she tried to struggle. "I did things I'm not proud of. But I did whatever I could to defeat you."

"All that bad come to no good," I pouted sarcastically. "Sad. And now you die and I take over your District. They'll be nothing but a whipping boy. I will take your resources. Who knows, I may even send your children into the Games," she struggled again, screaming savagely. "I guess I could keep you alive, to watch the District you love become my playground. But I'm a benevolent man. I hear Romantia call me Saint Terribilis."

"They speak Latin," her eyes narrowed towards me. "It means Saint Terrible. Because your image contrasts so sharply from your soul."

"Are you going to hurry up and kill this bitch?" I voiced like I hadn't heard her.

"We need a warrant," a Peacekeeper held out a piece of paper. When I raised my eyebrow, he explained: "Obviously as a non-Capitolian to be executed she doesn't need a warrant, the warrant is just to express your political approval - enthusiasm - in sending her to her death." I frowned. "It's a formality, created by your father. You've signed many a paper."

"I guess I didn't look at them," I held out my hand. "Make sure my pencil is nice and sharp for the signing."

The comedy bodyguard nodded slowly, removing a pencil and using a pen knife to sharpen it neatly in a matter of seconds. I snatched it from her and then jotted my signature down on the parchment the Peacekeeper held out.

"Not only do I give my approval for this woman's death," I said as I jotted my signature down. I checked the led pencil in the light to see if it was sharp enough, before continuing. "I kill her myself-" the girl didn't even react when I rammed my pencil towards her eye. Everybody either gasped or stood still in shock as my pencil plummeted through her left eye, popping it and impaling her brain. As the tragedy bodyguard let go of her, she immediately dropped to the floor, her body still trembling before she lay still forever.

"Sir, that was..."

"Quite fun," I nodded, silencing anyone who dared voice dissidence. "Now, I want somebody to get Tobias Harte to stop the silly District One fantasist. She's the closest thing I have to a viable rebellion now," I acknowledged, shrugging. I made my way out of the room. "No doubt someone can stop her."

So, yuck, I'm travelling tomorrow. Wish me luck :)

~Toxic

Eulogy! (My second one that was done in time!):

Sebastian: You were considered the average guy of this bunch of tributes, with very little to distinguish you from others. I think for that reason people didn't expect you to go so far, but I think in many ways those who are average, like you and me, could be interesting to explore in their own ways. I liked to see how such extreme circumstances could lead such non-extreme people to do extreme things. Some of those things necessary, some mistakes made in split second decisions. I honestly think had you survived the Games you wouldn't have lived, dealing with an intense addiction and the guilt of killing a young child (and, in this alternate universe, possibly others too). You didn't do decent things, but you were far from a villain. In fact, you were one of the better guys in the arena. You were honest, loyal, trusting, kind and an all round nice guy.

... But I realised that if you were one of the better people in the arena... That definitely makes the arena one filled with twisted people indeed XD