Darkness warning for things that are about to get unpleasant. You know the story description is rated M for sex and violence? You already read the sex. No graphic violence in this chapter but it will happen eventually.

Shoutout to all my AMAZING reviewers, you guys are THE BEST. Honestly, I love you all. To the anon who asked if BMO is a Muslim because he has an accent; I actually saw him as a Muslim boy because Mo is an accepted shortening of Mohammed, because diversity is awesome and because there's a large Muslim population in London and representation is important. We need more POCs, more minorities, more trans people, more real life diversity in our literature. So I wrote some.

Content Warning: nudity, anxiety attacks, veganism, mild references to mob violence.

"We're never gonna get checked out if you keep being so distracting."

"Me? How am I doing anything distracting? You're the one being sexy."

"How is packing my bag even a bit sexy?"

"Well it's about as sexy as anything I'm doing. I'm just sitting here."

"In nothing but your panties!"

"And? It's just a human body, everyone has one and it's nothing to hide. You're such a pervert, Bon."

Bonnie was going to stick her tongue out and come back with a clever retort but Marceline smiled her most devious smile at her and stretched languidly across the bed. She secretly delighted in the way the other girl's eyes followed the soft lines of her body as she moved. Bonnie sighed and shook her head fondly then leaned across and pressed a deft kiss against the warm skin of Marcy's throat.

"Put. Some. Bloody. Clothes. On... oh..."

She'd punctuated each word with a kiss; trailing higher and higher until the last one landed on the other girl's lips and lingered there for much longer than was actually necessary to make her point. Whatever that had been. She'd forgotten somewhere around the fourth or fifth kiss. Something about not being naked which couldn't be right because so far as Bonnie was aware there was nothing she preferred over a naked Marcy, literally nothing. All thoughts of bag packing forgotten she slid down into the other girl's lap and they continued to kiss breathlessly. Warm hands slid up and over that amazingly soft skin to tangle in the dark cascade of hair that fell all the way down Marcy's back. The dark haired girl slipped her own hands up and under the shirt Bonnie had only just reluctantly put on, stroking her chest and making her breathing hitch and-

"Housekeeping!" a cheerful voice from outside the door called along with a loud knocking and the slight squeak that told of a handle about to be turned.

"DON'T COME IN!" Marcy yelled in panic as Bonnie broke away from her. She scooted back across the bed and turned brilliantly red in the face again.

"Alright, I'll give you a minute to dress! If you want fresh towels just let the front desk know and old Starchy'll bring 'em up for you."

"Right! Thanks! Um, please leave!"

Despite her obvious embarrassment Bonnie was shaking with silent laughter. Marceline grinned at her sheepishly and tugged the bed sheet up from where it was crumpled around her bare legs to at least cover her chest.

"I'll, er, put some clothes on. We need to go get checked out." she mumbled, embarrassed.

As tempting as it was to just stay there for days more Bonnie refused to entertain the idea of missing more uni work and she was dreading discovering what kind of mess Lydia had left in the kitchen while she'd been away. She was still a little sad to slide the key card back across the front desk when they check out though. She'd very quickly overcome her discomfort at staying in such a luxurious hotel. She supposed that was probably Marcy's fault; it was really difficult to feel self-conscious around the other girl for too long. She was just too damn charming. She made Bonnie forget all about her discomfort when she smiled at her so brightly that it was like staring at the sun.

It was a much more pleasant journey home than the drive north had been; the atmosphere was much more relaxed. Bonnie drove with one hand on the wheel and the other threading distractedly through Marceline's hair; unwilling to give up the closeness of the last couple of days until she absolutely had to. Distantly she wished she could curl up with Marcy on the back seat and let the car drive itself. That would be so much better than having to keep her eyes on the road and miss all those little smiles and gorgeous tiny expressions that flitted across the other girl's face. There was a word for what she was feeling. She could feel it trying to form behind her lips but she bit it back with a self-conscious shake of her head. They'd been officially an item for two day and Bonnie was not even going to entertain being such a terrible lesbian stereotype and expressing that particular sentiment just yet. No matter how badly she wanted to yell it from the rooftops. Still it refused to go away completely and lingered unspoken on her lips. It coiled through her with every heartbeat, just waiting for a second's inattention to spill traitorously out of her mouth. She knew she'd have to be extra careful with what she said until she could be certain how the other girl felt. Nothing scared new girlfriends away more effectively than dropping that word too early and Bonnie would never forgive herself if she did anything to ruin things between them. For now it would just be her secret, glowing warm and safe in her chest every time Marceline smiled at her or touched her skin.

...

Around midday they stopped for lunch at a service station. Marcy ordered her habitual plate of plain rice and some lightly steamed veggies from the faux Chinese cafe in the crowded food court after carefully checking they were cooking it without animal products.

"Do you ever miss non vegan food?" Bonnie asked curiously as Marceline tucked into her vegetables with the kind of delight most people reserved for things like chocolate or expensive wine. Marcy paused, contemplating the strip of carrot she was holding between her plastic chopsticks with a thoughtful expression on her face.

"Not really, no. I haven't eaten meat since I was seven. I gave it up after the fire. It's amazing how much you don't wanna eat burned flesh after you've literally smelled yourself cooking like that. I use to eat fish for a while because the smell didn't cause post-traumatic stress flashbacks but I screamed the house down the first time Simon tried to feed me chicken soup. Anything with meat in it just smelled too much like how my skin smelled after I got burned and I was so messed up about it. Traumatised. You know I was functionally mute for the first few months afterwards? I'd only talk to my teddy bear; Simon used to have to ask Hambo if I wanted lunch or something and I'd make him reply in Hambo's voice. Anyway, in my teens I went fully vegan. I developed this awful phobia of contributing to anyone's pain in any way and some kid at school told me about how much it hurts for the cows to get milked and how they have their babies stolen from them so they keep lactating longer. So I just stopped eating animal products completely. Simon took me to a ton of head doctors who tried to convince me that eating animal products was good for me but I've been vegan for years now. I haven't collapsed with anaemia or protein deficiency so I figure I must be doing ok. I have vitamin pills and stuff so I don't get ill. Besides after this long I don't even remember what most of that stuff tastes like anyway. You can get vegan cheese and stuff but it feels like cheating." She shrugged and popped the carrot in her mouth, chewing it with obvious relish.

"Try giving up sugar, that's the really addictive shit." Marcy added around her half eaten food.

Bonnie rolled her eyes, far too used to hearing the same terrible puns from Finn.

"Yeah, I'm practically crack cocaine." she muttered under her breath. Marceline stared at her.

"Um, what? I think I lost context somewhere."

"Sugar is hella addictive?"

"...Yes?"

Bonnie flushed, suddenly mortified because Marceline didn't know her last name was Sugar. Oh God, had she never actually told her? How had she ended up spending a dirty weekend in bed with a ridiculously hot and very rich and beautiful gangster's daughter and not even bother to tell her her last name?

"It's just a joke Finn keeps making. Cause my surname's Sugar." Bonnie mumbled, unable to meet the other girl's eyes.

"Oh. Well that explains why you're so damn sweet and why I can't get enough of you." Marceline beamed. Bonnie groaned and rested her head on the cheap plastic table they'd managed to grab in the corner of the busy food court.

"Seriously, do I just have a weird fetish for dating people with a crap sense of humour or something?" she asked.

"Depends. Do your exes have a brilliant sense of humour like mine?"

"Well you and Finn keep making all the same jokes so-"

"Wait, Finn? You dated Finn?"

Bonnie looked up in confusion at the sudden shock and jealousy in her new girlfriend's voice.

"Um, yeah. For a few months before he figured out he was trans and we broke up. Now we're back to being just friends because he doesn't wanna date a lesbian and I have zero interest in dating a boy." Bonnie replied in a small voice, unsure what she'd done wrong. Marceline glowered at her for a moment.

"Did you fuck him?" she asked moodily.

"Marcy, c'mon. It was ages before we met, it doesn't matter does it?" Bonnie pleaded quietly.

"It matters to me! Did you fucking fuck him? You fucking did, didn't you?" Marceline accused in a loud voice. People were turning to look at them, whispering to each other and grinning at Bonnie. Someone wolf whistled and she very suddenly couldn't deal with it at all, she was about to have a meltdown. Her breathing was hitching in her chest and her palms were sweaty and tingling. Then without any warning she was outside with no memory at all of bolting from the table; running blindly across the car park until she was wrenching the door of her car open and hurling herself onto the back seat.

Slow your breathing slow your breathing slow your breathing slowslowslowslow-

It didn't work. She was hyperventilating, shaking hard while her vision swam in streaks of confused colour and completely unable to process what had just happened. Bonnie was aware that she was making a high pitched distressed keening sound but she couldn't stop. Couldn't do anything because she was so fucking stupid, disgusting, broke everything, pushed everyone away-

The car door opened again and someone slipped onto the seat next to her and pulled her into a rough hug.

"I'm sorry." Marcy whispered against her hair. "I just... I didn't know you'd done stuff with a guy. Another girl I could deal with but Finn's a boy and it doesn't matter if he's trans he's still a boy no matter what his plumbing looks like and it just, yeah, I got jealous. I'm so sorry, babe."

Bonnie didn't know how to reply to that. She just reached up and balled her fists into the other girl's shirt, pulling her closer and hiding her face against Marcy's stomach until her breathing finally slowed a little.

"Have you ever seen a therapist about your anxiety attacks?" Marcy asked softly, rubbing her back soothingly. Bonnie shook her head no. "You should, they really help. Babe I'm so damn sorry. I kinda turn into my Dad a bit when I get jealous. I hate it. I'm so sorry."

"S'ok." Bonnie managed to croak out after a long painful moment.

They sat together like that for a long time, quietly hugging on the back seat while Marceline murmured apology after apology. Eventually Bonnie's breathing returned to almost normal and she risked looking up at the other girl. Marcy met her eyes as gently as she could and stroked her face comfortingly.

"That's how he told me he was transgender. Right after our first time together. He literally rolled off and said it felt wrong and weird and he thought he was a boy not a girl and I made him feel so dirty and wrong, doing that to him in the wrong body. That I made him feel so gross and he was so upset with me. We didn't talk again for months. That's why I'm kinda weird about checking you definitely want it, that's why I asked like a hundred times." Bonnie whispered eventually. "Then I met this other girl, Shoko, and it took me ages to feel comfortable around her and trust her. I finally let her stay the night with me and when I woke up the next morning she'd gone. She'd robbed me and Lydia too. She took everything valuable and disappeared. Guess I'm just an easy person to scam."

Marceline just held her close, still running her hands over the other girl's back in gentle circles.

"You're a wonderful person and you deserve to be happy." she told Bonnie gently. "And you deserve so much better from me than yelling and accusing you in the middle of a crowded service station. I'm so sorry, babe."

"It's ok." Bonnie told her, sitting up a little so she could wrap her arms around Marcy's shoulders. "Really, it is. I should have told you sooner. I just got a shock."

"We ok?" Marcy asked her softly.

"Yeah. We are from my side."

"Mine too. But I'm jealous and weird and I have a temper. I'm damaged and have a ton of traumatic emotional baggage. You're still sure you wanna be my girlfriend?"

Bonnie took a moment to reply, staring at her with a small frown creasing her brow. Marceline held her breath, suddenly worried that maybe the answer wouldn't be what she wanted to hear.

"Yeah. I'm sure. If you'll still have me." Bonnie replied eventually. Marceline let her breath out all in a rush them leaned in to kiss her girlfriend again.

"You scared me there." she muttered against Bonnie's lips.

"You deserved it."

"Yeah, I really did."

...

It was late evening when they finally pulled up in front of Marcy's apartment block. She hauled the sound equipment out of the boot of the car and leaned in through the driver's door window to kiss Bonnie.

"Sure you don't wanna come up for a cup of tea?" she asked huskily.

"I'd love to, but I really have to get home. Too much to get sorted for uni tomorrow morning." Bonnie replied regretfully. "But I'll come by tomorrow night if you want? You did promise to show me all your hair care stuff."

"Yeah, we can have a night in with face masks and massages and stuff. I'd love that." Marcy replied. She grinned and leaned back in for another lingering kiss. She was so unwilling to go but also very aware that at any moment Mo might come wandering past and she didn't want to have to deal with him right then. She'd spent a lot of the afternoon trying to figure out how to tell him she had a girlfriend and she'd much sooner not have to do it with Bonnie right there. There was a good chance it would destroy her friendship with the boy but that was just a risk she'd have to take. Marceline had come to the conclusion that she was completely done with pretending to be someone she wasn't. So long as she had Bonnie by her side she almost felt brave enough to come out to the whole world and damn the consequences.

With a last kiss and wistful sigh she turned and lugged the amp back across to the doorway, waving as Bonnie pulled back onto the road and blowing her a kiss as she left. Marcy watched her drive out of sight with a warm mix of longing and elation swirling through her chest. She wished more than ever that they were still in their hotel room miles and miles away from anyone who could interfere or disapprove. With a shrug she hauled the amp up the stairwell to the first floor, juggling her keys and frowning when she found the door was already unlocked. Weird, she must have left it open when she left. It wasn't like her to be so forgetful and she put it down to how badly she'd slept on Friday night. She'd been plagued by old nightmares about the fire and new worries over Simon being ill and Mo acting weird. She was bloody lucky nobody had robbed her while she'd been away.

There was a letter on the rug behind the door when Marceline pushed it open. She struggled down the hall to her bedroom and shoved the amp into a corner before going back to close and lock the door, picking up the letter and frowning at it. It was addressed to Simon and it looked very official but most everyone who had any reason to write to him anymore knew to address letters to her on his behalf. She had no idea who it could be from. Marcy frowned harder and stared at the letter as she made her way through to the gloomy lounge to sink onto the sofa and rip it open.

That was the last thing that happened before her whole world turned upside down. Without any warning at all a voice straight out of her darkest nightmares spoke quietly from the old armchair in the corner of the room, the one furthest from the window that was always half in shadow.

"It's probably from the probation service telling you to expect me."

Marceline's vision swam with horror and turned black around the edges. She dropped the letter like it was on fire. Suddenly she felt light headed, like she was a couple of seconds away from a faint. The tall gaunt figure slowly unfolded itself from the small chair and smiled down at her fondly.

"Hello, Pumpkin. You've grown so much. How about a hug for your old man, then?"

The world tilted, too full of terror and sudden blazing pain, full of that terrible face and those cold eyes staring at her like he expected her to be glad to see him. Like he somehow thought she'd actually come and fucking hug the man who'd murdered her whole family. But then cold logic and survival instinct kicked in belatedly and she stood shakily and let him wrap his arms around her briefly. Marcy remembered what would happen if she didn't play along with his narcissistic games. Her shoulders ached and burned again when he rested his hands against them and she had to repress a shiver at his touch.

"You're so big now, sweetie. You look so much like Claudia." he murmured into her ear. Marceline did shiver with fear then, she couldn't help it. He didn't deserve to speak her mother's name. Underneath the cold terror and pain her hatred of him burned fiercely.

"D-daddy? What are you doing here?" she managed to stutter around the chill terror that felt like it was freezing her breath solid in her chest.

"They didn't tell you? The family were supposed to let you know. I'm a free man now, sweetie. I finally got my conviction overturned. I was wrongly accused and now I'm back, I'm finally free and ready to catch up with my little lady. It's so good to see you again. Are you ok, Marceline? You look a little pale."

"I'm just shocked, Daddy. I'm not upset to see you but, um, but I was just back for a minute to get changed. I have to go, I'm going out to, to meet my b-boyfriend." she stuttered, not looking him in the eye in case he could somehow read from her face that she was lying to him.

"Oh, of course. This must be a big surprise for you if you didn't know I was getting out today. Where's Simon? Got a lot of catching up to do with that old bastard." Hunson replied cheerfully. At least he'd bought her lie.

"Simon's sick, he's in full time care. He's got dementia and he forgets everything. It wasn't safe for him to stay here. It's just me left, I'm alone." she mumbled.

"Shame. We had some old business to discuss. Well now, get yourself changed and get going, I'll still be here when you come back. I'm a free man now, sweetie. I'm not going anywhere any time soon."

Marceline fled to her bedroom, grabbed a sweater from the pile by the door and all but ran out of the apartment block. She raced down the street and didn't slow down until she was on the underground platform, still shaking with fear and gasping for breath.

...

Ash picked up on the second ring. He must have been waiting for her call.

"He's out."

"Yeah, I know. My Dad is too."

They both paused, knowing where the conversation had to lead but unwilling to be the first to voice it. Eventually he sighed and said the words she was dreading to hear.

"So, we're beards again, then?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"This is… I don't even have words for it. Fucking... I just- I can't. Were you seeing someone?"

She paused. Ash was trustworthy, she'd been friends with him her whole life. And he stood just as much to lose from their shared secret being discovered as she did.

"Yeah, I was. A girl." Marcy admitted quietly.

"I thought you might. Yeah. I was seeing someone too."

"You told him about the family?" she asked cautiously.

"Not a fucking word. You?"

"No." Marceline lied after a moment of panic where her brain went completely blank. "I told her that my scars were from a car accident. She knows nothing, she's no risk. The family don't need to know that she even exists. I don't want to think about the kind of disgusting things my father would do to her if he knew."

"Of course. He is one sick bastard." Ash agreed. "Was it serious?"

She swallowed back the sob that wanted to force its way up her throat when he asked that. It was brand new and far too early to say and also the most serious and wonderful relationship in her entire life up to that point. She didn't even know how to articulate how she felt about it, she wasn't sure there was even a word for how she felt about Bonnie.

"I dunno. It was really new, like just this weekend new. She was... perfect. Just, fucking perfect."

Ash breathed out heavily. She could hear the answering sob he was repressing every bit as hard as she was.

"Yeah, Anton was too. He's in Paris doing a major runway, I moved my stuff out of the apartment a couple of days ago. I'm back home again, trapped there with my Dad."

"Was it serious with him?" she asked quietly.

"Yeah. Maybe? We hadn't talked about it much but, probably. Guess we'll just never fucking know now, will we?" Ash replied in a tight voice full of repressed emotion. "I'll come by your place tomorrow night, bring flowers and the usual shit, make it look real. Try to act like you're glad to see me and not like your whole fucking world just crashed down on your head and crumbled."

He hung up the line without saying goodbye and for a long minute Marceline just stared at her phone. Then she forced herself to tap out a quick message to Bonnie, all the while tasting bile in the back of her throat, with hands clenched so tightly that her knuckles turned white and it was hard to type.

hey somethings come up im gonna have to bail tomorrow ill call you when i can im sorry i love you

Marcy reread it over and over before she reluctantly deleted the last three words and hit 'send'. She turned back to the building behind her and pushed the door open, slipping her phone back into her pocket as she went. She was still numb all over except for her back which burned fiercely with the memory of agony. But the shock was beginning to thaw and give way to anger and terror instead. How dare he just walk back into her life like that and expect her to play the perfect daughter, after everything he'd done, after all those years?

Simon looked up from where he sat in the chair by the window when she came into his room and smiled happily when he saw her.

"Marcy! Is Betty with you?" he asked cheerfully.

"Just me today, Simon. Can I have a hug, please?" Marceline asked around the tears that threatened to push past her iron control.

He stood and shuffled forwards, wrapping his scarred arms around her shoulders almost in exactly the same way he had that terrible night when he'd pulled her out of the fire.

"Is something wrong, darling?" he asked her in a soft tone full of concern. And it was too hard, too much. She couldn't keep back from crying when Simon was asking her so gently what was wrong.

"Hun-Hunson's back and he's ruining my life again!" Marceline sobbed, resting her head against her uncle's shoulder and letting the tears flow. "I finally found someone that made me h-happy and who liked me just for me and now he's out of prison and he's going to destroy it all again!"

"Hunson." Simon growled in a voice of thunder.

"I hate him." Marcy whispered around her shameful sobs.

"I do too, darling. That evil bastard."