CHAPTER SEVEN: St. Olga's Reform School for Wayward Princesses
Wow okay it's been a bit. Sorry about that. Also, THE NEW GRAVITY FALLS. AHH. WHAT. NO. ALEX CAN'T END IT LIKE THAT. NO. UNACCEPTABLE.
Hem.
Liliana Dragonshard: Thank you so much!
Godzilla2915: At the moment, the whole point of this story is that it follows the story line of Star vs. the Forces of Evil. For now, it's all episodes. I have the entire plot of this story figured out already.
MariposaFalls11: Ah, Toffee and Marco. That's a relationship that's going to be really interesting later on.
Princess Dia: I'm absolutely still working on the book. I was actually working on it right before I edited this. I may eventually post it on Fictionpress or Inkitt. Thank you so much!
Guest: I honestly have no idea what you're talking about.
Ghost: Pffft if they were written by Bill they'd say stuff like "Buy gold" and "Don't turn around" or something.
Rayfe: I love writing the fortune teller.
Tristrike: Thanks so much!
I don't own Star vs. the Forces of Evil. I'm so ready for the hiatus to be over uggghhhh.
Everything you know is about to change.
GENERAL POV
"What do you mean, you want to break a flying unicorn head out of princess jail?" Marco asked, completely baffled.
He leaned against his kitchen sink, switching his phone from his left to right ear and studying his monster arm with mild interest as he listened to Star ramble about her friend Pony Face or whatever on the other end of the line.
He flexed his monster arm, smiling thinly as he stretched it out for the first time in a week. It got cramped at times on Earth, and there was rarely time for him to exercise it and make it stop aching. Whenever he was alone at his house he made it a point to change his arm into the tentacle.
"….so anyway," Star was saying, "I'll be there in like three seconds and we'll go bust her out."
"Wait, what?"
The dial tone rang in his ear and Marco leapt away from the sink, fumbling his phone and dropping it to the floor as he frantically tried to relax and make the monster arm go away before Star got there.
He took a deep breath and watched as the arm twitched and then receded back into his shoulder, his red hoodie reappearing on his body just as a portal opened up in front of him. Marco made a diving leap for his dimensional scissors, which were sitting out in the open, and nearly stabbed his hand as he swiped them underneath a side table.
"Uh, Marco?"
Marco flipped over on his back and sat up on his elbows, lifting his gaze to meet Star's. She was looking at him with a raised eyebrow and she held out her hand to help him off the floor. "Why are you on the ground?"
He clasped his fingers around Star's without a second thought and for a brief moment was tempted to flip her onto the floor and end her and her kingdom then and there, but he refrained and allowed the girl to pull him to his feet.
"I slipped on a puddle of water," he lied, dusting off his hoodie. "So what are we doing again?"
Star rolled her eyes. "Going to save Pony Head!" she reminded him in exasperation. "She's stuck at St…St Ol…."
She started stuttering violently, her face paling to a color that reminded Marco of glue. "Star?" he asked, leaning over just a little and peering into her eyes. "You okay?"
She shook her head and pursed her lips. "St. Olga's….arggghhhhhhh!"
Marco's lips twitched into a smile and he tilted his head. "St. Olga's Reform School for Wayward Princesses?"
Star let out an ear piercing scream that Marco swore could shatter steel and she dove under the kitchen table, burying her head in her hands. He huffed and crossed his arms over his chest. "Star, we aren't even there yet," he reminded her.
She crawled back out slowly, standing up and clenching and unclenching her fists. "Right. Right. Okay. So I can probably just snip our way right into Pony Head's room, then we can get her and get out."
Marco shrugged. Sounded easy enough. He followed Star through the portal without hesitation, frowning in confusion as they landed outside of a massive, somewhat ominous, castle. "Uh…this isn't Pony Head's room," he observed.
As Star complained about how they hadn't been taken right to her room, Marco surveyed the area. In one direction he spotted a massive tower with glowing light shining from it, and instantly deduced that it must have been some sort of power source to keep wayward princesses in and unwanted visitors out.
"We're gonna have to sneak in," Star murmured.
Marco glanced at her just as she zapped herself with her wand, stepping back and covering his eyes as bright light shone around her. How the nearby guards missed it, he wasn't quite sure, but when he looked up again his jaw almost dropped.
She actually kind of looked badass. The horns and the dress and even the eyepatch…her hair had even become more unruly. Marco chewed on the inside of his cheek to hide his smile. "Do me," he suggested.
When the light dissipated, he was back to being irritated by the bubbly princess in front of him, no matter how good she looked. "Seriously? You couldn't have made me look like one of those guards?" he asked in disgust, tugging on the pink skirt around his hips.
"No way. Besides, pink is definitely your color," Star answered firmly.
Marco rolled his eyes but followed her to the entrance. Why was he doing this again? Was destroying the kingdom of Mewni really worth wearing a dress?
As he and Star traversed through the school and he started spotting more and more princesses being forced into submission and turned into monotonous zombie versions of themselves, he decided that maybe….maybe the destruction of Mewni could wait a bit. He kind of wanted to free these princesses, so that none of them would ever do to a monster what had been done to his family.
Star peeked through each and every door they passed as quickly as possible while Marco kept a close ear on the guards behind them. When she finally found the right door, it took all of Marco's willpower to keep the princess from breaking the door in.
"We have to be stealthy," he reminded her, reaching into his hair and pulling out a bobby pin with almost no surprise. He leaned over and, with tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth, he broke their way into Pointy Head's room.
Star promptly jumped inside and flung her arms out to the sides. "I'M JUST HERE CAUSE I HAVE TO SAY-"
"Shhh!" Marco hissed, shutting the door behind him. "Do you want to get caught?"
"Oh, sorry," Star said sheepishly as she turned back to Pony Head. "Hey! Pony Head! We're here to bust you out!"
The floating horse head-Marco wasn't quite sure what all that was actually about-turned around with the most unnerving face that Marco had ever seen. If this was Star's best friend, he wasn't quite sure where that put the girl in terms of sanity.
"Sadly I must refrain," the horse said in an almost British accent. "But would you care for some crumpets and tea?"
"I got this," Marco said with a roll of his eyes. He walked up to the floating horse and waved a hand in her face. "Hey. Pointy Head. Let's go."
For the briefest moment, Pony Head's eyes cleared and she stared at Marco with something akin to terror, her nostrils flaring. Just as quickly, however, she was back to her dumbed down, girly self. "I am afraid I cannot, but thank you ever so much for popping in."
Marco frowned and glanced back at Star. "Maybe we should just grab her and go."
Star nodded. "Right. I'm on it."
She grabbed Pony Head by the muzzle and tucked the horse under her arm and, after creating a distraction courtesy of a teapot and some ribbon, Marco and Star took Pony Head and ran. Of course, like Marco had suspected she would, the princess started yelling, trying to direct the guards towards them.
"Should I blast our way out?" Star asked Marco anxiously, her hair flying in her face.
Marco frowned and shook his head. "No, that'll just draw more attention to us," he decided. "What we need is a distraction."
His distraction came in the form of a room full of princess' learning to "properly" hold a teacup, each one of them looking as if they would rather have their eyes stabbed out with a hot iron than be there (strangely, Marco knew a guy that could do that for them). As he studied the desolate looking princesses, a lightbulb flickered to life in his brain.
What did these girls want more than anything else? Hell, what did he want more than anything else? To be accepted as an individual.
Marco bit his lip and spit the words out before he could stop himself. "It's not criminal to be an individual!"
Star looked at him in surprise and then started grinning as the rest of the princesses began repeating his chant, stomping on and throwing their teacups around the room. Marco felt a small sense of pride grow in him at the sight of these girls, but repressed it in order to grab Star by the wrist and pull her and Pony Head to safety.
"Teehee, he got scolded," Pony Head laughed.
"She's laughing at an authority figure!" Star gasped in delight. "That means the real Pony Head is still in there!"
If the horse head enjoyed laughing at authority for fun, Marco had a strange feeling they would actually get along. As they ran along, searching for an escape route, his ears picked up the sounds of guards behind them and his gaze landed on a laundry chute.
"There!" he said, pointing and pulling it open. "Get in. I'll see you on the other side."
As he climbed in after Star, however, he felt his stupid pink dress snag. "My poofy skirt is stuck!" he yelped, struggling to pull himself free.
Cold fingers clamped around his ankle and he kicked back, locking panicked eyes with Star. "Something's got my stockings," he nearly whimpered.
"Marco!" Star cried out as she slid down the chute and away from him.
The boy was yanked backwards by multiple guards, and he yelled out in rage. Seeing that Star was nowhere in sight and the only ones around were robotic guards, he let his monster arm grow and thrashed away at them, struggling to get free.
But there were more guards than there were Marco, and it wasn't long before he found himself captured. He got rid of his tentacle arm in defeat, resigning himself to the fact that he had been captured.
He was thrown into a chair in front of a screen, lost his bobby pin, and then the next thing he knew there was something clamped around his eyes and everything went blank.
When he came to again, Star was on his right and Pony Head was on his left, supporting his weight with their bodies. "Come on Marco, let's get you out of here," Star said.
Marco blinked woozily. "Are they gonna let me keep the dress?" he slurred out.
They ran through the hallways as quickly as possible, and at one point Marco glanced over at Pony Head. "I'm glad you're back to normal," he decided. "I like you better this way."
The princess glanced at him and snorted. "You too. Now I can make fun of that ugly dress."
Marco frowned ever so slightly, feeling unusually protective of the dumb dress, but he didn't get a chance to comment as they made their way down into the bedroom hallway to find every princess banging on the bars with teacups and chanting: "It's not criminal to be an individual!"
"Wow, you really worked some turd magic on them," Pony Head commented.
Marco ignored the turd comment, feeling a small smile twitch on his lips. He had, hadn't he? These girls were all riled up and wanted to be their own person….because of him. Marco hadn't felt so accomplished in a long time, but his gut was telling him that he wasn't done.
"My work isn't over," he found himself saying. "My fellow wayward sisters: they want you to be a rubber stamp princess. Well I say it's time we stamp on them!"
While the girls cheered and whistled, Star took a few seconds to blast them from their rooms. As soon as her back was turned, Pony Head thrust her horn at Marco's neck. "Listen, Marco, if that's even who you are," she hissed, her eyes furious. "I know you aren't who Star thinks you are. I can smell it."
Marco froze, his heart racing a mile a minute, and Pony Head narrowed her eyes. "There's something monstrous about you, you turd, and I swear if you hurt my girl B-Fly, I will decapitate you."
He swallowed thickly, his Adam's apple bobbing. "Pony Head, I-"
"Shut it," the horse head growled. "You tell me right now, are you planning on hurting my girl?"
Marco met her gaze head on. "No," he said firmly. "I don't want to hurt her."
They stared at each other for several heart pounding seconds before Pony Head moved her horn away from his chest, her eyes darting towards Star protectively, who was still working on getting the girls out. "What are you, exactly then?" she asked softly, her eyes still narrowed.
Marco winced, knowing he was caught, and he looked over at Star. "I…I'm from Mewni," he admitted quietly, chewing on his lip. "And I…I'm a monster, but I didn't want Star to freak out so I didn't tell her."
Pony Head scowled. "Why would she freak?" she demanded.
Marco looked at her in exasperation. "Pony Head, she fights monsters for fun. What do you think she would do if she knew I was one?" he asked desperately. "Please don't tell her."
Pony Head studied him for a long moment, long enough for Star to come bouncing over with about two dozen princesses behind her. "So, we ready to go kick some monster butt?"
Marco caught his lip between his teeth and turned his gaze to Pony Head. The unicorn head nodded slowly and gave Marco a thin smile. "Yeah. Yeah, we are, B-Fly."
He gave her a grateful smile and the group charged out the door, taking down every guard in the vicinity. As Marco watched Star elongate her wand and fire off a blast that took down the entire security system, he couldn't help but smile. He might have been wrong about her; she was kind of really awesome.
His gaze flickered to the tower, which was tumbling down, and he instinctively reached his arms out, grabbing Star with one and Pony Head with the other. "Looks like that did the job!" he yelped, yanking them out of the way.
As the dust cleared, Marco looked up and met Pony Head's eyes, and the two gave each other wary smiles. Marco wasn't sure he trusted her to not tell Star, but for the time being it was all he could do.
Besides, he thought to himself as he surveyed the now partying princesses, maybe I won't destroy Star. Maybe….maybe the only thing that needs to go is the rest of the kingdom.
The crystal ball smashed to pieces on the floor and Toffee howled, digging his claws into the tellers face and drawing blood. "THE HEAD WASN'T SUPPOSED TO FIND OUT," he roared at her, closing off her windpipe slowly. "NOW WHAT?"
The teller gasped for air, clutching at Toffee's hands. "She won't….tell…..she isn't…..a…variable," she rasped out anxiously.
Toffee dropped her in a heap to the floor and knelt, glass crunching under his knee as he clutched the teller's scarf in his hand. "She better not be," he hissed.
He stormed out of the tent and the teller took a moment to breathe, to calm down. She slowly held her hands over her crystal ball and murmured a few words softly, watching as the pieces swirled through the air and collected back together in a sphere shape.
She caught it tenderly and deposited the ball back onto its stand, passing a trembling hand over it and rubbing the bruises that were forming on her neck.
"Foolish demon," she muttered, peering into the ball. "If he would have stayed, he would have seen that the flying pony head is the least of his concerns."
She gazed towards the doorway of the tent and scoffed. "Your precious boy won't be grateful to you much longer, Toffee," she grunted.
She looked over at the calendar and smiled as her eyes landed on the circled holiday of Mewnipendance Day.
"And when you don't have him in your clutches, there is no possible way for you to prevail."
Oh snap. Now Pony Head knows that Marco isn't who he says he is. But the teller says she isn't a variable….right?
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