A/N: One more chapter and then we'll get our favorite ladies interacting with other people again. I wanted to give you guys a little more of their history, and perhaps a better understanding of Sharon's feelings for Andrea. Also more insight on how Sharon's been feeling about her relationship with Andy... because Sharon's got a decision to make, and it isn't one that can be made overnight. Hope y'all enjoy it! And thanks so much for your continued interest in this story. :)

5.

The wind had been vicious the night Andrea told Sharon that she was done dating. Sharon hadn't thought she heard her properly at first. They'd been walking towards the car from the museum they'd spent hours looking around when Andrea had finally started filling Sharon in on what had been on her mind that she had not wanted to think about when she asked Sharon if she would like to spend the day with her. The air had whipped around them, loud and harsh, and Sharon had needed to hold Andrea's arm and pull Andrea close to her so she could make out the words being said to her.

"She said it's unnatural to feel so strongly for a friend." Andrea had been angry when Sharon arrived at her house that morning, but she had not wanted to talk about it at the time. Sharon had taken her friend out for breakfast, and then they spent the day walking through a park they frequented. They had a late lunch and then went to a museum that was close by, doing anything to keep Andrea from having to think about what had made her so upset that morning. "Unnatural, like there's something wrong with loving someone."

Sharon found herself remembering bits and pieces of that night quite often lately. Getting dressed in Andrea's bathroom, Sharon frowned at her reflection and tried to clear the thoughts from her mind. She had spent her entire shower worrying about how her next conversation with Andy would go, knowing that she would have to be as open as she possibly could about the role Andrea played in her life. Andrea had told Sharon that she would no longer be dating because each person she had dated while being Sharon's friend had thought they were too close, and Sharon couldn't help but compare Andrea's exes to Andy.

Andy felt the same way, she knew, and he didn't even know how close the two of them really were. They were closest when others weren't around to witness it, connected in ways that could not be seen by the naked eye, so there was no way for him to have known without Andrea or herself telling him. So she had to wonder how he would feel after their conversation. Would having this conversation only make things worse, or was the only way Andy would be able to understand was if Sharon laid everything out on the table for him?

Sharon straightened out her gray cotton shirt and buttoned her jeans, sighing to herself.

"If I ever look at another woman like I might be interested, I'm counting on you to remind me that I don't want to go through this again. I have the career I want, a great family that I love, even though they are about as dysfunctional as it gets, and there are plenty of animals out there to adopt if I ever get lonely."

"And you have me," Sharon remembered saying to Andrea, the words leaving her mouth so very carefully but carrying so much meaning. Andrea's eyes had been positively glowing, her smile the most beautiful thing Sharon had ever seen. "Yes. And I have you."

When she told Andrea she had her, she meant it. Andrea had been an incredible friend to her, and she had no intention of leaving Andrea's life. That was nearly five years ago; Sharon felt that if she were to say those same words to Andrea now, they wouldn't hold the same meaning. Their connection was certainly stronger now than it had been at that time, and they'd experienced more of life together. Sharon had given a great deal of herself to Andrea over the course of their friendship, but she still caught herself wondering if Andrea fully understood how big of a deal that was for Sharon.

Andrea had understood why Sharon had chosen not to date – the marriage she had still legally been in, the issues Jack had caused in her life that she wanted to rid herself of, and a few smaller reasons – but understanding how much it meant to Sharon to trust someone as much as she trusted Andrea wasn't as simple. On some levels, of course, Andrea knew how difficult Sharon found opening herself up to be. She'd spoken to Andrea about Jack's dishonesty when he was struggling with his addictions and she had been trying to help him get through the rough times, told her how he'd left her feeling used and taken advantage of countless of times. Sharon had been hurt badly during their marriage, and Andrea had known that from early on in their friendship. So, yes, Andrea knew Sharon did not trust easily, but Sharon didn't think Andrea knew that she hadn't even trusted Jack the way she trusted Andrea after their ten years of friendship.

Andrea gave more freely than Sharon had in the beginning, but she never pried or pushed for more from Sharon. It was because she didn't do those things that Sharon had slowly let Andrea in. She had undressed her soul for Andrea and felt comfortable doing so. Andrea had always held up each layer Sharon removed as an offering for Sharon to take back and put back on if she needed to, as if to say that there was no rush and she could reveal however little she wanted. That had made Sharon feel safe with Andrea. One day it had gotten to the point where she was bare and wanted nothing more than for Andrea's eyes to be on her. She wanted to be seen by her, wanted Andrea to know her, to learn everything there was to learn.

To be naked and unafraid of letting someone see the scars that marked your soul was the ultimate level of trust, and that was Sharon's way of giving herself to Andrea.

"You can have all of me," Andrea's voice whispered in her mind, words she had heard the night before as she laid in Andrea's arms, and Sharon wondered not for the first time since last night if Andrea really meant that. All of her. What did all of her include, she wondered, because Sharon already felt as though Andrea had been given all of her and didn't want to assume she knew what else Andrea would give to Sharon.

Sharon rubbed her temples and felt her stomach twisting uncomfortably, knotting like rope, and she knew she needed to stop her mind from going down the well-traveled road it knew so well. The more she thought about Andrea, the harder it was to remember that she wanted things to work out with Andy. A nasty wave of guilt rushed through her. Andy's face appeared in her mind, his adoring eyes and boyish yet handsome grin, and Sharon's heart tightened in her chest. She shouldn't need to remind herself that she wanted to be with Andy. Sharon knew that wasn't how it should be. But there she was thinking about Andrea and filling her mind with hopes she had given up on three months ago.

Sharon spent a lot of time feeling guilty for things she wanted and her actions lately. It weighed her down that morning and made her body feel tired despite having spent the night sleeping marvelously. She knew there were things she needed to work through, feelings that were buried deeper than she was willing to visit right now. She was confident that if she sat down and looked at her innermost thoughts and deepest emotions that she would find a way to shrug off the guilt that tried consuming her. But Sharon also knew she wasn't ready to confront what was waiting there for her, not yet, not again. After all, it was hidden there for a reason.

. . .

Andrea was in the kitchen, eating a cinnamon roll when Sharon came looking for her. "Want?" she asked, holding up the bitten icing-covered roll as she leaned over the bar. Sharon's nose scrunched up in that way that made Andrea want to lean forward and kiss the small wrinkles at the bridge of Sharon's nose. She licked the sweetness from the inside of her cheek and quickly pushed away that urge, though.

"Not unless it comes with a magic pill that keeps me from needing to visit the gym to work off all the sugar I would be putting into my body," Sharon responded from the other end of the bar.

Andrea rolled her eyes and took a large bite from her cinnamon roll, moaning around it dramatically.

Sharon licked her lips and shook her head, unamused. "Would you like me to leave you alone with that?"

Andrea laughed after swallowing. She sucked her thumb clean and let her eyes travel over Sharon's body. Why she was even a little concerned about visits to the gym was beyond Andrea. Sharon had an incredible figure, and in jeans that clung to the shapely curve of her ass and showed off her lean thighs, Andrea had a hard time looking away from it. That, however, seemed to amuse Sharon.

"So which one of us is going to inform your cinnamon roll that it now has competition?" Sharon asked as she crossed the distance that separated the two of them, knocking her shoulder into Andrea's. When Andrea hummed, confused, Sharon laughed softly and licked her lips. Her voice lowered as she spoke, a little husky. "Well, it's just that you were starting to look at me like you wanted to eat me, Andrea."

Andrea knew her cheeks were tinted red, could feel the heat crawling up her neck. But she did not look away from Sharon, instead choosing to let her eyes slowly move over the other woman as she licked her lips. She hummed in her throat and let her eyes linger on a few of her favorite places on Sharon's body before looking into the woman's eyes, green eyes that flashed with something that moved too quickly for Andrea to identify before the other woman was raising her brow and trying to hold back a smirk.

She was ready to say something about how she bet Sharon would be an even tastier morning treat or something else that would make Sharon blush so she wasn't the only one doing so, but she lost her nerve when she saw Sharon's eyes drop down to her mouth and Sharon's tongue sneak out to dampen her lips. She was reminded that she was playing with fire, and she was already hot enough.

She cleared her throat and pushed her nearly-finished cinnamon roll to Sharon, giving her hip a squeeze as she walked around her. "It's two bites. Your body has nothing to worry about, trust me," she said, and then she left Sharon alone in the kitchen.

. . .

Sharon waited in the kitchen for close to five minutes before she let out a small breath and decided to go find out what had just happened that she clearly missed since she didn't understand why Andrea had left. Something had gone wrong in the matter of seconds, and Sharon wasn't sure what it was. She would be leaving soon, and she didn't want to leave with them not being all right.

She didn't think it was what she had said that had caused Andrea to disappear like she had. No, that couldn't have been it. Andrea had responded to Sharon calling her out for the way she was looking at her by continuing to let her eyes rove over Sharon's body. Sharon had even noticed a slight change in Andrea's breathing as she did so, a more noticeable rise and fall of her chest while she traced Sharon's hips with her eyes as though she could feel the flesh beneath the clothes and wanted to paint it with words of not-so-hidden desires.

It wasn't as if this was the first time Andrea had checked her out and Sharon teased her about it. Andrea enjoyed looking at her body, this Sharon had known for years. It had never been an issue before, but she had to wonder if perhaps that was just another thing that would be added to the list of changes between them. Perhaps she should have wanted that, if only for Andy's sake, but she didn't. If Andrea wanted to check her out, Sharon didn't want her to stop herself from doing so. Besides, Sharon liked the way it felt to have Andrea's eyes on her.

(Andy. Andy. Andy. Andy. You're dating Andy.)

Sharon found Andrea in her home office, neatening a bookshelf. And if Sharon hadn't known something was wrong before, she would certainly know now. "Need a hand?" Sharon asked from the doorway, leaning against the doorjamb and smiling softly at her friend. She wouldn't enter the room, not yet.

Andrea flicked her eyes up from the large bookcase and shook her head in the negative. "I was putting a book up and then noticed it's been a while since I straightened these out," she said as she slid a book into place and it hit the wood with a thunk. "I didn't mean to take so long."

Sharon hummed, simply watching Andrea as she dusted her hands off and stood up from the floor. Andrea tucked her hair behind her ear and looked around the office, at the desk against the opposite wall, the file cabinets with photographs on their sides, the rug Sharon helped her pick out a few years ago. She looked everywhere but at Sharon.

Sharon knew it was up to her to say something. They'd been hitting too many walls in the last 24-hours. They'd always been comfortable with each other, able to discuss almost anything, so this wasn't something Sharon was used to. However, she could tell that something was clearly going on inside of Andrea's head and it didn't appear to be something she was going to share with Sharon on her own. Sharon would just broach the topic instead. She would find out why Andrea had left the kitchen so suddenly.

But before Sharon had figured out what she should say, Andrea broke her silence. Her question, however, came as a shock to Sharon and didn't seem to have anything to do with her abrupt departure from the kitchen.

"Why didn't we ever talk about it, when you decided that you wanted to see other pe- - when you decided you would consider dating someone? That feels like something we would have spoken about, but I didn't find out about it until you were telling me Lieutenant Flynn asked you out."

Andrea rested against the edge of her desk with her legs stretched out, ankles crossed, and Sharon found a sudden interest in the blonde's feet as she tried to calm the sudden rush of her heartbeat. Andrea sounded curious and uncertain, but there was a small amount of hurt she knew Andrea was trying to keep hidden in her tone. Sharon picked it up, of course, but she wasn't sure how to respond to the question and make whatever doubt or pain Andrea was feeling disappear at the same time. Her arm wrapped around her middle and she straightened up against the doorjamb, her fingers curling into her side.

Sharon carefully brought her eyes up to meet Andrea's patient ones. "I don't think there was any specific moment before that conversation that I realized that it was something I wanted," Sharon answered honestly, slowly, trying to remember exactly when she knew that she felt ready for everything that came with dating. She'd considered dating before then, but considering it and being ready were not the same thing. "I'd been more than happy with the way things were in my life, honestly."

A small smile graced Andrea's full lips, but it only lasted for a mere second before Andrea frowned at something and ran her fingers through her hair, pulling out the elastic that kept it back. "But it wasn't enough."

Sharon's stomach churned. That sounded a whole lot like 'I wasn't enough', and Sharon hated thinking that Andrea actually believed that. "Andrea."

Andrea shook her head and gave Sharon a smile that was clearly forced. "I didn't mean for that to sound like an accusation. I'm just trying to figure everything out."

"Everything?" Sharon questioned slowly.

Andrea made an odd hand gesture as she said, "You and Andy. You and me." Andrea nibbled on her bottom lip and looked away for a second, and then she sighed. "That's why I've been in here so long. I started thinking and, well, I have more questions than I do answers right now."

Sharon hmmed and looked around the office before entering it, not going all the way over to the desk but taking a seat on the armchair that Andrea liked to use to read in when she was in this room. "Maybe I can give you the answers you're looking for."

Andrea turned so she was facing Sharon, eyeing her for several heartbeats before speaking. "When did it stop being enough?" she asked, hesitant, her eyes full of something Sharon saw very little of so was unable to easily put a name to. "When did you realize you wanted more than what you and I had, more than what I could give you?" It sounded like something she'd been battling with for a lot longer than she had been in this room.

Sharon's heart ached as Andrea looked at her, waiting for an answer that Sharon didn't think she could give. Andrea's friendship meant the world to her, and that had never stopped being enough. It was more than enough, it was the most important relationship in her life when she excluded her children from the equation. But she also understood why Andrea might have felt like Sharon didn't look at it that way. And, in a way, Andrea was right. Not about what they had not being enough, but about her wanting more. But she had wanted more from Andrea. It wasn't about someone else giving her something Andrea wasn't, it was about wanting more from Andrea. But that was something she couldn't have, and she had accepted it and was grateful to have Andrea in her life in the ways she did.

"Sharon?" Andrea questioned softly.

"Sorry," she replied, trying for a smile but not feeling her lips form it. She shook her thoughts out of her head and straightened up in the seat, slipping her hands underneath her thighs when she noticed she'd been twisting them together. "Uhm. I- -" Sharon dampened her lips and chose her words carefully. "Do you remember the night you told me you didn't think you would be entering another romantic relationship again?"

When Andrea nodded, slightly confused expression on her face, Sharon continued.

"That was also the first time you told me that you would always put me first. I don't know if you knew at the time how much that meant to me, or how true it would come to be, but from that day, not only did you always make me a priority, but I also knew that I would do the same. So, when did what we have stop being enough? It never did. I might have made the choice to date Andy, but that had nothing to do with us, or you, not being enough."

Andrea took a moment and then nodded her head slowly, seeming to accept what Sharon had said. "You know, I always knew there was a possibility that there was someone out there who would do something right to make you consider dating again. But..." Andrea shook her head as a quiet chuckle left her mouth. "I wasn't expecting it would be Andy Flynn."

It wasn't, Sharon thought with a sad smile.

"What are you doing?" Sharon asked through her laughter as Andrea left her on the sidewalk and started hurrying across the street as the seconds counted down before the light would change.

"I'll be right back," she shouted, jogging away and disappearing into the crowd of people on the other side of the street.

Sharon pulled her bottom lip into her mouth to help control the wide smile that had taken over her face. She moved out of the way of people passing by and stood close to the diner they'd just exited, waiting for Andrea to return to her. As she waited, Sharon checked her email and text messages, busying herself with her phone.

Vibrant pinks and reds and soft whites met her eyes a few minutes later, a bouquet of flowers, calla lilies and roses, being held in front of her. "Back," Andrea said, breathing a little rushed, but it was nothing compared to the quick beating of Sharon's heart as she looked over her phone and to the flowers and the woman holding them. "Hope you didn't miss me too much. These are for you."

"You..." Sharon swallowed. "You bought me flowers?"

Andrea looked at the flowers, at Sharon, and then back at the flowers as she said, "It looks like I did. They're your favorite, too."

"They are," Sharon said breathlessly as her smile slipped back on to her face, her eyes holding Andrea's. "What did– Why..."

Andrea took Sharon's phone from her hand and pushed the flowers into it instead. "No reason. I noticed the florist while we were eating, and I thought you might like them."

"Flowers for no reason," Sharon said slowly.

"Flowers to make you smile."

"But Andy makes you happy," Andrea said, pulling Sharon away from her thoughts. It sounded strangely like a reminder, like the same reminders Sharon gave herself sometimes.

"You keep bringing up my happiness as if I was unhappy before I started dating Andy."

Andrea only hummed and pushed herself up from the desk, walking over to the window to look out to the backyard.

Sharon got up as well, needing to make something clear to Andrea because she was feeling less and less certain Andrea already knew what she had to say. She stood behind the blonde and let her chin rest on Andrea's strong shoulder, looking out the window with her until Sharon felt Andrea relax against her body. Andrea reached behind her and took Sharon's hand into her own, her warm palm sliding over the back of Sharon's hand. She gave it a long squeeze, holding it tightly and then wrapping Sharon's arm around her.

"You brought so much happiness into my life, Andrea," she said softly, speaking close to her ear. "You reminded me how much fun life could be after I had let myself forget. You came into my life at a time when everything I knew was changing, the kids were both out of the house most of the year, and there was an...emptiness that I didn't know I wanted to be filled until you had already done so. I don't want you to ever forget that it was you who made me laugh and smile all those times I felt like it would have just been easier to bury myself in work to avoid going through certain things in life.

"It was never about grand gestures with you. You were there for me when I needed you, and you did small things every day that made me extremely happy. You make me happy, Andrea." She turned her head and let her lips brush behind Andrea's ear carefully, gently. "I am happier than I've ever been with anyone else when I'm with you."

Andrea exhaled a shaky breath and slid her fingers between Sharon's. "Stay with me a little longer, just like this," she requested, leaning back into Sharon and letting her hold some of her weight.

Sharon wrapped her other arm around Andrea and held her close.

"I'm happiest with you as well, and when I know that you're happy."

Sharon leaned her head against Andrea's and smiled. "I'm happy right here," she whispered.

"So am I."

. . .

Andrea walked into her bedroom once Sharon was gone. The bed was unmade, the sheets rumpled and the pillows scattered across the top. She felt a familiar tug in her chest as she climbed into the bed and pulled one of the pillows to her face. Lavender. She breathed in and closed her eyes, letting the smell of Sharon fill her body as she clung to the pillow and the feeling of being surrounded by Sharon.

She wondered if she would be given any more chances to hold Sharon like she had the night before. She knew she shouldn't, but she hoped for more nights of being able to feel Sharon's body pressed against her own as they slept peacefully. If she couldn't have that ever again, she hoped that the burning want she felt would die down soon, or else she would soon be burnt to a crisp.

to be continued...