Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist.
Remember Me
Alphonse Elric had complications with his body. He couldn't feel it. Al swears every time he moved his bones would crack. Also, he could only see out of two small holes, making it difficult to see his surroundings. For the millionth time today, he had to remind himself that he was back in the old suit of armor.
Like last time, Al did not have a choice. This was for his big brother. This is the first step to recover the Fullmetal Alchemist. Al had to remind himself that as he watched the blond homunculus, Pride.
"Brother," his quiet voice was similar to Edward's. "Why are the two blond captors keeping us here?"
The homunculus was confused and scared, and he had every right to be. Alphonse and Winry are holding him hostage and tried to kill him. Al had to act like a different person from his human form. The homunculus wanted his armor brother, not the guy who attacked him. Al and the armor had to be two separate beings.
Al had to comfort the homunculus, "It will be okay, Brother. They won't hurt you. I won't let them."
Pride stared at the armor with gratitude. Al could still see the fear in his eyes. What have the homunculi done to his brother? He is so fragile and timid. Pride is a shell of Fullmetal.
Pride looked down at his fidgeting hands, "I wish I could protect you too, Brother. But, my other brother says I'm useless."
Al had to keep his anger under control. Pride talks about the other homunculi as if they are his family. He wants to punch him and yell that he is his ONLY brother. Nothing positive would come from that. The armor is the only person in the house Pride trusts. He'll run away if the armor frightened him.
Al had another approach, "He doesn't sound very nice. You're not useless. I bet you're great at a lot of things."
Al saw Pride's reaction through the eye sockets. He eyes grew wide like a shy toddler. Pride was not use to all of the praise Al's giving him. Pride shook his head, "I'm not a good fighter. I can't hurt anything with my scythe. It's too heavy."
An idea popped in the armor's head. "Would it be nice if your blade was attached to your arm?"
Pride did not comprehend that. The armor waved his hand, "Try imagining that. It would be a lot easier to fight with then a big, heavy scythe."
Still baffled, Pride examined his right arm. Al gleefully watched Pride start to slash imaginary things with his arm. The homunculus smiled at his imaginative brother and admitted, "That would be great."
The homunculus and the armor sat on opposite sides of the room, facing each other. Pride kept the armor close ever since Alphonse first transferred his soul into it that morning. Since then they talked like ordinary brothers. The homunculus told his secrets and opinions for hours.
Alphonse easily lost track of time. The sun is almost done setting. Suddenly, the armor started to shake violently. The homunculus's eyes widened with fear. He had no idea that this is an inevitable event. Al tried to console him, "Its okay, Brother. I am falling asleep."
Pride did not believe the weak lie. He rushed over the armor, traumatized. Pride made the trembling armor look up at him. The homunculus was panicking, "Brother, what do you mean? You don't look okay."
There was not much time to explain without revealing himself. Falling asleep was the best excuse he could think of. Al watched Pride's distressed face as his eyesight started to fade. He heard one more helpless, Brother, before his consciousness was pulled from the armor.
The next thing Alphonse saw was beige bed sheets. He checked his hands to make sure that he is in his human body. Al made himself fall asleep so he could focus solely on the homunculus. It was an added bonus that he received the best sleep he had all year. He feels completely relaxed now.
Al pushed himself to an upward position and sighed. Down the hall, he heard frantic clapping. He had to think of something to say to Pride. In a drowsy state, he headed out of the spare bedroom to the now dim lit hallway.
He found Winry outside of the sealed off bedroom. She was listening to the distraught homunculus crying for his fallen brother. "What are you going to say to him?" she stared at the door when she asked.
The homunculus had become the primary discussion in the Rockbell house. Both of them are relieved that Pride did not lay a finger on them. However, that could change without the influence of the armor brother.
"I don't know. I…" Al was wrapped with shame. "He's afraid of me, because I harmed him. Winry, he thought that we were going to torture him."
Winry nearly burst into tears. How could Edward think that? She barely kept her composure, "He doesn't know us."
Winry turned to Alphonse. Al can see all of the worry and sadness in her eyes. She had trouble sleeping too. The evidence was in the bags under her eyes. "We can't recreate years of lost memories. What are we going to do?"
"I'm trying. Edward is still in there."
Fear rose in Al when the metallic clicking and wailing came to a halt. It's nice that could hear himself think, but silence was worse than the noise. Without thinking, Al burst through the door and scanned the room. The suit of armor was tucked snug in a bed. Alphonse is surprised that Pride was able to move the armor by himself. However, he's more concerned about Pride's whereabouts right now.
Alphonse calmed down when he saw movement. The homunculus was sitting on the floor behind the bed. He was holding his knees to his chest and he kept his head down. The homunculus is very aware that Al is in the room.
Alphonse thought of a dozen icebreaker phrases to say. Since he is not in the armor, he can't simply say brother. His eyes darted to the armor again. "I'm shocked that you were able to lift the armor by yourself."
Al did not get a response from Pride. He couldn't think of another topic, so he continued on, "Don't strain yourself. Next time, ask for help."
The homunculus blinked. Strangely, Alphonse was satisfied by that small reaction. He took another step closer, mindful of the space between him. "You don't have to stay stuffed in this room. You can stretch your legs and go downstairs."
"I don't want to leave my brother." Pride's voice was stern.
The homunculus doesn't know how much that hurt Alphonse. Pride treats Al as if he is an enemy. Only the armor saw the shy, nervous side of him. Al had to disguise his pain for the hundredth time today, "I know. On the other hand, you should let him sleep. I bet you wore him down today."
The homunculus blinked again; considering what Al just said. Pride doesn't know that the armor doesn't tire that easily. Pride finally looked up to face him. He kept his face as expressionless as he could.
Al did not move. He at that moment he saw his brother again. That's the face he made when he tried to hide his emotions in battle. Al did not want to provoke or startle the homunculus with sudden movements.
"I want to stay with my brother." Pride reinstated.
Alphonse gave up, "I understand."
Pride did not accept any type of affection or comfort from Al or Winry. He even refused to eat any more apple pie. A new wall of distrust formed when he found the armor in the basement. Alphonse couldn't force the homunculus to interact with him.
Al paced to the bedroom's exit with his eye on Pride. He nearly forgot that Winry was still in the doorway. Al had closed the door halfway closed when Winry suddenly grabbed his arm trembling and hid behind him. Al glanced over his shoulder at her. She whispered, "Look."
Al stopped when he realized Pride was walking. He kept his head down avoiding eye contact with the two. He slowly made his way to the bed with the armor in it. The homunculus dropped to the bed and curled up next to the armor. His gold hair hid his face. Al felt another sharp stab in his chest. It was almost like old times.
He finally closed the bedroom door and sealed the room with alchemy. The only way Pride could leave was through a heavily reinforced wall. Alphonse felt like his heart was being squeezed in his chest. He leaned on the closed door and started to sob. He whined through the sobbing, "This is my fault. This is all my fault. I abandoned him when he needed me."
In response, Winry started to rub his back. She used her sweetest voice, "You can't blame yourself, Al."
"Why couldn't it been me? Edward doesn't deserve this. Why him?" Al was babbling by now.
Winry applied more force in her back rub. She used her free hand to tug on Al's arm. "Come on, you need to eat and take it easy. He's not going anywhere."
Winry's right. He is not going to let Edward out if his sight. Even now, Al is feeling anxious that he doesn't see him at that very moment. It didn't matter if he was in his human body or the armor; as long as he can see him. He is starting to regret not waking the armor while he had the chance.
Al was too focused on Edward to take care of himself. His appetite vanished when he dragged the homunculus into the house. The only reason he was able to sleep was because the armor babysat Pride for him. His human body was starting to react from the neglect. Alphonse took a few deep breathes and replied, "You're right, Winry."
The two headed downstairs to eat a homemade dinner that Winry prepared in advance. It was easy for Al to forget about his own basic bodily needs. Basically, he turned into Edward; his primary concern is his brother and everything else, including himself, is secondary.
"He's very quiet." Winry whispered into her spoon.
"He doesn't have anyone to talk to."
"Will he talk to us?"
"Not without the armor."
Al sighed. He was getting tired of talking about the homunculus. But, changing the subject was nearly impossible. They were worried about Edward for so long and they finally found him. Well, most of him.
"You have to get some sleep, Win. You look exhausted."
Winry sighed this time. She took the hint. They finished their dinners in silence, because there was nothing else to talk about. After washing the dishes, they stealthy headed back upstairs. Without the constant chattering of the homunculus and armor, every step they made had an echo.
"I am going to stay out here." Al sat down in the hallway. The last time he took a nap Pride escaped. He doesn't want to go through the stress of chasing him around the house. Winry was too emotionally drained to argue with Al. She slipped into her bedroom without saying anything.
Al sat there for hours and dozed off without realizing it. When he snapped out of his sleep, he had aches all of his body; another reminder that he needs a bed to sleep. The morning sun seeped through the hallway window. It has been hours and still, not a peep from the homunculus.
Alphonse got up and stretched his muscles while watching the bedroom door. This was not what he expected. Pride have not tried to escape or made any fuss all night. If Pride was still Edward, he would have fought, yelled, and demanded his favorite foods every fifteen minutes. Pride is more tamed than Fullmetal. That must be the homunculi's fault.
Alphonse stumbled to the bedroom door and unsealed it. He opened the door to find the blond homunculus in the same position he last saw him in; curled up next to the lifeless armor. Al bent down to Pride's eye level to see if he was awake. Hidden under the long gold bangs was a blank, dead stare. Pride completely ignored Al's existence.
Alphonse straightened up. The homunculus is not going to connect to him and Al doesn't want to try. He did have something to say, "I'm sorry for assaulting you last night. I overreacted. I don't care if you accept my apology. I want you to know that I regret it."
With his words lingering in the air, Al clapped and slapped the armor. He quickly left the bedroom; then sealed the homunculus and the armor in it once more. Alphonse had to break through Pride's walls the old-fashioned way. He hopes the apology was a start.
Inside the locked bedroom, the homunculus was trying to wrap his head around Al's apology. Pride became puzzled trying to figure out his motives behind it. The armor faked a yawn and greeted Pride, "Morning, Brother."
The homunculus sat up on the bed. It was the first time moved in hours. He didn't have a choice; he was guarding his sleeping brother. It was the least he could do. Pride is ashamed that he couldn't wake himself. What kind of big brother is he?
"Are you okay, Brother?" the armor asked concerned.
Pride looked at the armor. He still can't believe that he found him. "I'm fine. Just thinking about something,"
"You can tell me." The armor retorted. This was the only way Al can know what in Pride's head.
Pride smiled weakly at the armor, "I know I can. But, I'm more concerned about you. Don't scare me like that again."
The armor reached to touch Pride's shoulder. "I should have told about that earlier. I was so excited to see you again that I forgot."
Pride stared down at the armor. Sometimes, he doesn't know how to respond to his brother. The homunculus is happy to be in a contained space with him. He'll choose his armor brother over his other brother any day.
A/N: I humbly apologize for any tears I may have caused. I feel sorry for the characters, too. This is a hard story. Thanks for sticking with it.
A. Leaf