Disclaimer: I do not own DGM nor any of the characters
Death…by Pinecone
Strolling through the woods was not Malcolm C. Leverrier's idea of fun, he was not in the mood for a nature hike. But he had been left behind by the group that he was traveling with a town over from the location of headquarters, he had no idea how they could have forgotten to wake him and he was livid. The scowl that decorated his face made it clear that there was going to be hell to pay once he made it back to headquarters, the man's hands clenched into fists as he stalked through the forest.
How he could have thought it was an accident was anyone's guess but he was under that delusion.
"Someone is going to pay for this," the man growled as he continued to walk.
He was starting to get tired however and was debating sitting down under one of the trees and taking a bit of a break before continuing on his way. On the one hand he was in a hurry to make it back but on the other he was out of shape and not used to exercising anything save for his mouth so he was starting to run out of steam.
In the end that was what won out, the man making his way over to a huge tree and plopping his butt down on the ground. Which only served to prompt more complaints from the man and more grumbled promises that someone was going to regret this egregious oversight.
He, Malcolm C. Leverrier, was much too important to be sitting on the ground out in the woods.
Or so he thought anyway.
Unbeknownst to him the spot that he had chosen to plant his butt was going to end up sealing his fate. Overhead, nestled amongst the branches and leaves of the ancient tree, was a similarly ancient pinecone. And while a pinecone may be unassuming to most this particular pinecone weighed in at an amazing twenty-two pounds.
Which would not have been a problem had it stayed where it was, up in the tree.
Alas twas not meant to be however.
What exactly dislodged the pinecone is a mystery that is unlikely to ever be solved, mostly because no one is likely to care one way or the other about it. All that needs to be known is that something, be it wind or a supernatural force above the comprehension of normal men, knocked the pinecone from its resting place and sent it plunging toward the earth.
Again Leverrier would have been okay had he decided that a short rest was enough and moved.
But that was not to be either.
As the pinecone fell it reached speeds that would make its weight comparative to that of a bowling ball by the time that it finally touched down. Not on the ground as it would have had Leverrier not be in the way but right on top of his head, the sound of impact almost seeming to echo in the otherwise silence of the woods.
Not even knowing what hit him Leverrier slumped over.
Dead.
From a pinecone to the cranium.
A/N: Another one, this took awhile to do because I was having some issues coming up with a new way to do him in. You'd think I'd be better at this but apparently the sadistic muses decided to take a holiday and leave me hanging. Anyway, please leave a review and tell me what you thought, give a suggestion, just celebrate the sadism XD