A/N: Dearest reader, no words could ever suffice to make up for the awful, unforgivable amount of waiting and uncertainty I've put you through. Still, I want to try, and offer you my sincerest apologies for the hiatus. I could spend way too much time explaining myself, but I'm pretty sure it would be of no interest to you, and I don't wish to take up too much of your time with my ramblings, anyway. All I can say is that I'm so, so sorry I left you hanging like that; it was never, ever, my intention.. But I guess that in life, things don't always go according to plan. Now, however, I'm back and full of motivation to finish my story. I've probably managed to shoo all my readers away, but just in case you'll be so kind as to return to me, I'm humbly asking for you to give me another chance. I won't let you down, not this time.

Now, let's finally carry on with the story! Here comes chapter 18, I hope you'll enjoy!

I come to you in pieces
So you could make me whole

Silence. That was the first thing Newt's foggy mind registered. He frowned at the dull ache throbbing in the back of his head, and he shifted just a little, groaning.

How bloody much did I drink last night?

Newt was about to chuckle when the realisation suddenly hit him. In the span of a few seconds, all the memories, some of them hazy and others crystal clear, crashed into his consciousness and his eyes flew open, his heart beating wildly in his chest.

"Tommy!"

Newt bolted upright in a flash and winced at the pain as his body resisted the sudden movement. His limbs got tangled into bed sheets, and only then did he realise he was actually in his own bed.

"What the hell-?" Newt croaked, battling with the sheets for a good long minute, his hands shaking and panic washing over him in waves, making it hard to concentrate on anything. A quick overall glance had made it clear he was alone in his room, but it didn't stop Newt from checking everywhere and calling out for Thomas with his heart in his throat once he was freed from the suffocating sheets.

His body was stiff and his head felt heavier in a way Newt hadn't felt in months, which made him wonder if he had been drugged. The last time Newt had been under the influence of strong medicine was months back, and a sudden stinge in his ankle made him hastily push away all thoughts trying to creep up on him. He needed to concentrate, not to fall apart, especially not now.

The second he was convinced that Thomas wasn't anywhere in his room, he made his way to the door and stormed out, shouting the dark-haired boy's name and crashing into every room along the corridor. Every single one of them turned out to be empty, and as Newt stumbled down the stairs, he couldn't help but be reminded of his dream in which Thomas had been missing, too.

What the hell have they done to him? And where in bloody hell is everybody?

"Tommy! Tommy-"

"Newt?"

Newt was currently going through the – empty – bunks in the lower floor of the Homestead until he heard a voice calling out his name. The voice, however, was wrong and certainly not the one he was looking for. Still, the boy whirled around in a second, his eyes wild.

"What are you-"

"Where is Tommy!?"

Both boys talked at the same time, but Newt's desperate shout drowned out Jeff's confused voice.

As the Med-jack registered Newt's question, the boy visibly flinched and avoided his gaze for a second, and none of it went unnoticed by Newt. In a few strides, the blond-haired boy had crossed the room and pushed the other boy against the wall, holding the collar of Jeff's shirt tightly in his fists, breathing raggedly.

"I asked you a question, and you're bloody well gonna answer me! Where. Is. Tommy?!" Newt shouted, staring at the wide-eyed, startled boy sternly.

Jeff's mouth trembled as he tried to get the words out, but suddenly another voice interrupted them.

"Jeff? What- Newt?" Alby stepped through the open doorway but stilled quickly as he took the scene in, seemingly taken aback.

The second Newt noticed Alby, he let go off Jeff and took a stumbling step back, focusing his gaze on the dark-skinned boy.

"Alby, what the hell is going on?" Newt demanded, shaking visibly now. He felt more than slightly on the edge, and if someone didn't soon tell him where Thomas was and what had happened to him, he was sure he was going to lose it for good.

Alby raised his hand to pinch the bridge of his nose, squeezing his eyes shut and sighing heavily. Newt stared at him, his chest rising and falling rapidly, his nails digging into the skin of his palms as he balled his hands into tight fists. After a while, Alby raised his gaze to meet Newt's again, and held out his hand in a calming gesture.

"Newt, please, just calm down. You look awfully pale, I think you should-"

"DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" Newt spat, taking a trembling step forward.

Alby visibly twitched at Newt's sudden outburst and lowered his hand slowly, begging the blond to calm down with his eyes. "Alright, alright. Just.. listen. It's been a living hell here since the moment we woke up." Alby took a little break, as if to sort out his thoughts, and Newt stood still, all alert.

"It all started when I was on my way to breakfast, a little later than usual. Suddenly one kid stormed out of the forest, screaming for help. Me and a couple of boys ran over and the freaked-out boy took us into the woods. There, in the middle of it, we found Minho, unconscious, beaten up to a pulp."

"Oh my God," Newt exclaimed, bringing his hand to his mouth, shock hitting him like a bolt. "Is he alright? Was Thomas there too? What-"

"Just listen, okay? Minho's alive, but he's not doing particularly well. It might take a couple of weeks for him to recover properly from all his injuries.. But he'll make it," Alby stated, and Newt let out a relieved breath. The knowledge that Minho was going to be alright reassured him only momentarily, though, and soon the panic and worry for Thomas rose back up to the surface, making him tremble.

"We carried him to the Med-jack's room over there," Alby nodded towards one of the doors on the wall which Newt hadn't yet had time to check. "And when he woke up, he was talking all gibberish about Ben and a couple of Builders and Thomas-"

"What did they do to him? Where is Tommy?" Newt cut Alby off, his heart trying to break through his ribs.

Alby looked Newt steadily into his eyes. His voice as calm and collected as he could manage, he uttered out the words, "They took him.. They took Thomas into the Maze."

"W-what?"

The word was a broken, disbelieving whisper slipping past Newt's numb lips. He only registered he was falling as his knees hit the floor and his arms extended before him to keep himself from crashing to the ground altogether. Alby and Jeff were by his side in a second, holding him by the shoulders and calling out his name, asking if he was alright with words that got mingled together in Newt's ears as his world was crashing down around him. His chest felt so tight he thought he couldn't breath for a while, and suddenly everything inside him ached.

After a moment Newt raised his head, looking at Alby with a flash of vulnerability in his eyes that was quickly replaced by his usual defence, irritation and anger. "How could something like this happen? How did some bloody Builders just slip past the Doors without anyone noticing? Without the Runners noticing?"

Alby sighed, lowering his head. "There wasn't much we could make out of Minho's groggy words, but then one of the boys said he had seen the Runners leaving early in the morning. As you probably know, Minho was supposed to spend the day teaching Thomas here in the Glade, and that's why he had instructed the boys to leave without him. We figured out that one of the Runners must've teamed up with Ben and the others and help them to get Thomas out of the Glade unnoticed by others. Then we found you, lying crumpled on the floor of your room and-"

"Did you send someone after them? Alby, tell me you sent someone after them," Newt said, urgency lacing his tone, his eyes big and appealing.

Alby averted his gaze, his eyebrows drawing together as he whispered, "Newt, there was no one to send. I asked people to look for Ben and Thomas and the others all around the Glade, just in case, but no one could find them anywhere. That's all I could do. All the Runners are still in the Maze, and there's no way Minho could take even one step forward right now. And even if we did have someone, we would have no clue as to where Ben and the others went and left Thomas. You know our rules, Newt. No one goes beyond the Walls-"

"SHUCK YOUR BLOODY RULES!" Newt screamed, suddenly stumbling back up to his feet. "How could you just leave him there? How could you just sit here and do nothing, while Tommy is in there! He's gonna die there-" Newt's voice broke at the last word and he squeezed his arms around his stomach, slightly bending over as a pain so immense hit all his insides that he wondered if something was truly broken there.

"Newt, you have to understand. There's nothing we can do. No one, no one could have predicted something like this would ever happen-"

"No- I- I just can't understand. I don't want to understand. Why in bloody hell didn't you wake me up? I-I-"

"What would you have done, Newt? When we found you, you were deeply unconscious and badly injured. You probably have a concussion and you actually should be resting right now-"

"I WOULD'VE BLOODY GONE AFTER HIM!" Newt shouted, trembling all over again. He felt like he was teetering on the edge of a sharp knife and no matter where he would step next, he would be hurt. "I'm not a bloody coward like you shuckheads!"

"Newt, please, just calm down," Alby started to close the distance between them, resting his hands firmly on Newt's shoulders. "I promise you we're going to punish Ben and the others the way they deserve. They won't just go on with their lives as if nothing happened. Something like this can't happen ever again. We can't afford people turning against each other here," Alby explained, speaking as reassuringly as he could.

Something in Alby's words nagged at the back of Newt's mind. "Wait.. Are you saying..?"

"Ben and the others arrived some time after lunch. Ben confessed it all and we locked- Newt?"

Newt shook himself out of Alby's grasp and was out of the room before he even realised what he was doing. A white rage had sliced its way through Newt's thoughts, burning everything in its wake and urging his legs to stride outside, heading for one certain destination.

The familiar cube-shaped building made of concrete stood before Newt as his shaking fingers dig his keys from his pocket, trying to find the right one. Soon he slammed one of the keys into the lock, twisted it, and after a satisfying click, he threw the door open and stepped inside, trapping the door locked so that it was hard to open from the outside.

Behind Newt, an amused chuckle pierced the silence of the Slammer.

"Well well well, look who decided to pay me a visit! How's-"

Ben's words were cut off abruptly as Newt launched himself at the handcuffed boy, tackling him to the ground and digging his knee to the boy's stomach as he squeezed his arm against his victim's throat in a choking manner.

The Builder's head hit the ground hard and his arms were crushed under his own back as Newt straddled his waist. The boy would've groaned in pain had there been any air left in his lungs. His slightly injured face turned red and his eyes bulged as he was gasping for breath, trying to struggle against Newt's unyielding hold.

Newt leaned closer, his eyes almost black as he stared at the boy under him, anger roaring inside him like a fire.

"Where is Tommy?" Newt growled the words to Ben's face, emphasizing every single word.

Ben tried to say something, but only a gurgling sound escaped his throat since Newt's hold of him wouldn't allow enough air in his lungs.

Newt narrowed his eyes and eased his hold of Ben a little, drawing his hand and knee back but still holding the boy captive against the ground.

Ben started coughing and tears streamed down his face as he tried to get his lungs working again.

"Speak already, you bloody shuckface," Newt spat, his patience wearing thin by the minute.

Ben focused his eyes on Newt and after a second his mouth curled into a bloody, devilish smirk full of arrogance. His smile kept spreading until tortured chuckles started rising up his throat, a cackling laughter slipping past his lips. Newt flinched at the voice, staring at the boy, utterly dumbfounded.

He's lost it for good, the bloody moron.

"STOP LAUGHING AND BLOODY ANSWER ME!" Newt shouted, thrusting his arm back into Ben's throat, even tighter than last time, making the boy almost choke in his own laughter.

The Builder started to move restlessly under him again, his hands trying to break free and his neck arching, trying to draw in some air, but Newt's hold wouldn't budge.

After a while, Newt took his arm back again, curling his fist against the collar of Ben's shirt and drawing it taught against his neck.

"Spit. It. Out. I won't ask you a third time. I'll bloody kill you, I swear I will," Newt uttered, every word dripping with threat and malice.

Ben was coughing again, but clearly tried to suppress the coughs, drawing in sharp breaths one after another, staring at Newt, wide-eyed. When he finally opened his mouth to speak, his voice was as hoarse and dry as a sandpaper and Newt could only barely make out his words.

"You can't save him. There's nothing you can do. You're not allowed to leave the Glade.. and we made sure Minho would be out of the order as well," Ben's mouth started to curl into a cruel smile and Newt's gaze turned back to a murderous one. He urged his arm closer to Ben's throat again which caused the boy to cough several times and continue speaking. "Even if you did break your holy rules.. There's no way a limping idiot like you would make it there and back in time, carrying your precious Tommy with you. I'm afraid he might be quite unable to move on his own," Ben croaked, starting to cackle again and then it was finally too much for Newt.

There was an audible smack as Newt struck his fist straight to Ben's face and his nose cracked nastily, splaying blood immediately. Ben howled in pain, his voice almost inhuman. Newt's knuckles burned but he couldn't feel an ounce of regret at seeing the other boy in visible agony.

"Tell me where he is, right now," Newt whispered, his voice as dangerous as ever. He brought his hand under Ben's chin, digging his blunt nails in his skin.

Ben was whimpering now, but his words were laced with hatred, as he uttered, "He deserves everything we did to him. You have no idea, no idea at all, what he has done, Newt. I saw it, in my mind, in my memories.. The Changing is a gift, Newt. After it I saw everything much.. clearer. Thomas is evil, Newt. He doesn't belong here. He deserves to-"

Newt's fist connected with Ben's face again almost without a conscious thought. He struck a blow after another, quickly losing count how many times he actually hit the boy.

After some time, Ben's face was almost unrecognisable under all the blood. Then, suddenly, something broke inside of Newt, and a quiet sob escaped his throat as he sat back, shaking, before he jumped off of the boy completely, stumbling a few steps back.

What am I doing? This doesn't help Tommy one bit. The bastard is never going to tell me where he is, anyway..

Once freed, Ben curled up into a pathetic ball in the ground, his breath wheezing loudly in the silence of the room.

Newt stared at the beaten boy in the ground, panting hard. He shook his head and started to retreat back towards the door.

Suddenly Ben spoke up again, and Newt stilled.

"Go ahead, run into the Maze after your precious Greenie. Go ahead, and kill yourself in the process, too. He might be dead already, anyway.. Maybe he rolled off over the Cliff himself. We might've left him quite on the edge, who knows.."

Newt strode over the room again and kicked Ben hard into the stomach, making the Builder howl in pain and curl up on the ground even tighter. Newt crouched down next to the boy, looking at him with loathing radiating off of him in waves.

Newt leaned over, bringing his face close to Ben's. "Ya know, I'm pretty tempted to strangle you for good, but I won't make it so easy for you. I'd rather let the Grievers do the dirty work.. I doubt they will stop at one little sting this time."

With that, Newt rose and made his way out of the Slammer. As he stepped over the threshold, however, Alby cornered him immediately.

"Newt, what the hell are you doing?" Alby demanded. Newt recoiled slightly at Alby's sudden appearance, but soon an unreadable expression settled over his face and he ignored the older boy, locking the door tightly behind him. He was about to step past Alby, but he was stopped in his tracks as a strong hand seized his shoulder.

"Newt, answer me! I'm worried about you, alright? Why are you acting like this?" Alby asked, worry and helplessness mixing in his eyes.

Newt cringed and tore himself free of Alby's hold, his eyes turning cold again, his face an angry grimace.

"What do you think, Alby? Why do you bloody think I'm like this?" Newt snarled and stormed off.

Alby didn't let him go so easily, though. The boy ran after Newt, calling out to him.

"Newt! Newt, wait! I'm sorry, I know this is hard for you.. But do you really think beating people up will help?"

Newt growled and turned around, throwing his arms up in the air. "It bloody sure made me feel better! Without that bloody lunatic, Tommy would still be here and none of this klunk would've happened! We should've banished him the moment he came back from the Maze weeks ago, stung!" Tears glistened in Newt's eyes and he took in a shuddering breath, turning away slightly. He couldn't let his feelings get the better of him, not now. He had job to do and he didn't have any time to lose.

"Newt.. I told you earlier, no one could ever have imagined he would do something like this! It seemed Ben was like Gally, and that he was recovering okay- Oh, great," Alby growled as Newt rushed away from him again. "Where the hell are you even going?"

"I'm going after him."

That made Alby stop in his tracks as if he'd walked straight into a wall. He gaped after the blond, utterly taken aback.

"You can't be serious, Newt," Alby shouted.

Newt stopped at the front of the small warehouse that held all kinds of Runners' equipment. He started fiddling with the lock, paying no attention to Alby as the boy approached him. Just as he unlocked the door, Alby's large hand appeared on its wooden surface, pushing it back shut. Newt whirled around, glaring at Alby.

"I won't let you leave, Newt," Alby stated gravely, looking his friend straight in the eyes.

Newt raised his chin, meeting his gaze. "You can't stop me," he scowled.

"Sure I can. You're only second-in-command, you must-"

"Don't you dare playing superior against me right now! There's no way in hell I'm just gonna swallow this klunk and leave Tommy there! He won't make it back here by himself! He will die, Alby!"

"If you go there, you won't come back, either. You'll both be dead. I won't lose you, not like this," Alby said, his voice trembling just a little.

"And I'm not gonna lose him!" Newt shouted, and his voice sounded dangerously close to a breaking point. Alby twitched slightly by his side as Newt shivered and curled his hands into fists, avoiding the other boy's eyes.

Newt cleared his throat. "I know where Tommy is. Ben told me. It's still early afternoon, and I'll have plenty of time to run to the Cliff and get Tommy out of there. We'll make it back, I'll make sure of it. I can save him." Newt's voice grew more certain and as he raised his head, he wore a determined expression on his face.

Alby shook his head, his brow deeply crinkled. "How can you even trust anything that Ben says? This might all be a trick, and you'd be risking yourself for nothing! Please, Newt, let's think about this before doing anything too hasty." The leader of the Gladers looked at Newt with sad, worried eyes.

"No, Alby, this is no trick and you know it yourself. You're right, I can't trust Ben, but I know Thomas is out there, and I'm not leaving him. Even if I won't make it back.. It's the risk I'm willing to take," Newt said, facing Alby with his chin raised, his eyes full of defiance.

Alby looked at him for a long time, silent.

"Please, Alby. Let me go," Newt pleaded, swallowing hard.

Alby sighed heavily and rubbed his hand over his forehead. He looked pained, and Newt felt sorry for him. It wouldn't be an easy decision for Alby, sending Newt to the Maze after everything that had happened.

After a while, Alby lowered his hand from the door of the warehouse, and Newt sensed his friend had finally given up trying to stop him.

"You shouldn't go alone," Alby said, his eyes filled with pain.

Newt sighed in relief inwardly, and answered quickly, his voice firm. "I won't risk anyone else's life than my own. I was a Runner once, and I still know the way to the Cliff and back like the back of my hand. I can do this."

"I should go with you-"

"No, Alby. We can't leave the Glade without a leader, especially not now. We can't risk anything happening to you," Newt opposed determinedly.

Alby gazed upon him, a grim smile on his face that didn't reach his eyes. "I'm not irreplaceable, you know," Alby said with a low voice.

"Neither am I, Alby," Newt pointed out, crossing his arms over his chest stubbornly.

"Newt..." Alby's eyes moistened, and the boy was about to step closer but in the end, he stopped himself and lowered his gaze to the side as his fists balled by his sides. "All I'm saying is..You shouldn't risk your life like this, either. I don't think this is worth-"

Newt was quick to shut Alby up again. "I make my own decisions, Alby. I'm not your responsibility, or no one else's, either."

Alby stared at him for a while, and then his expression settled. The boy surged forward, bringing his arms around Newt, and hugged him tightly.

"I know, Newt, I know," Alby said with a slightly broken voice that hurt Newt's heart. "Just promise me you'll make it back."

Newt drew in a sharp breath, taken by surprise, but in the end he hugged Alby back, burying his face in his friend's shoulder.

"I promise."

*.*.*

Fifteen minutes later, Newt had eaten a quick, light lunch and packed a small backpack with water bottles, granola bars, disinfectants and some other first-aid stuff.

He didn't want to make a big deal about his depart, and so he didn't tell anyone he crossed paths with what he was going to do. Alby had followed him around but while they were in the kitchen, Newt had asked the boy not to follow him to the West Door so he could avoid drawing any extra attention. Alby had grudgingly agreed.

Now, Newt was walking towards the huge Doors, his heart in his throat. The whole situation felt so bizarre. A few months back, Newt had decided he would not take a step past those Doors ever again - not as a Runner, at least. He had never quite lost his hope of them someday finding their way out of the Maze, but month by month it all had started to taste more and more like false hope.

However, Newt was now about to step into the Maze again. He was about to trap himself inside the mess of those narrow, dark corridors, sharp turns, deadlocks, and ivy walls that almost reached the sky above. He was about to run the Maze, for the first time in months, and expose himself to all the dangers the Maze hid inside itself.

Newt stopped right before the Doors, giving one last glance at the Glade. He noticed a few boys had stopped their working and were looking at him. Newt knew Alby wouldn't let anyone follow him, and it wasn't like anyone wanted to follow him, anyway.

As Newt turned back to face the long corridor ahead of him, he couldn't help feeling as if he was looking into the mouth of a treacherous beast.

Newt drew in a deep breath, and then he ran.