Chapter Five
Beth stretched, her hands flying up in the air for a moment as she leaned against the wall. Thoroughly stuffed from the pork meat that they cooked up. A lazy smile that she turned to Daryl, where he sat in the corner of the large living room, one arm hooked over a knee as he finished up his meal as he looked around the room. Their eyes met, and Beth's grin widened as she stared at him.
Surprisingly, he returned the smile making her cheeks turn red and look away. Her stomach tightening for a moment before he brows scrunched together. What the hell kind of reaction was that to a smile. A returned smile at that. Shaking off the thoughts, she closed her eyes, hoping to drift off for a moment before something else came up. Unfortunately, the moment of leisure died away as Maggie came to stand in front of her.
"We need dish water," she explained, holding out a small pale. Beth looked glanced at it and then to her sister.
"I did it last time," she said, closing her eyes again. The pale was dumped in front of her. "I did watch last night."
Beth scowled at her, their eyes meeting for a mere moment before Beth forced herself up, grabbing the pale as she did so. "Fine, but you're so doing this next time."
"Whatever," Maggie snapped back, settling down next to their Daddy who was immersed in a book he found upstairs. Beth made her way to the door, somewhat grumbling that she was being forced out the door at this time. She heard mumbling behind her, more of a whisper than anything before Carl pipe up, "I'll go with her."
She turned to see the young boy grabbing his gun, making sure it was hanging off his hip with a knife on the other side as he made his way over. Beth looked around the group, wondering what pulled the boys away from his reading when he noticed Daryl nodding his head in the back. His eyes leaving Rick's in that silent communication they were steadily getting better at as time passed. She narrowed her gaze at him as Carl shuffled up next to her, grabbing the pale from her hand. She didn't say anything though as they made their way out. At the doorway, she grabbed her ax. Holding it tightly as they made their way through the fence and out to the creek.
"You didn't have to come with me," she said, not really looking at the boy next to her. More focused on their surroundings than anything and when she did look over, she noticed Carl was doing the same. His eyes darting left and right, ready for anything as he shrugged.
"Ain't good for anyone to come out here alone," he stated. Making it sound like the easily explanation possible. Beth shrugged at that, her gaze focusing on the river up ahead.
"It's just a five minute walk though," she pointed out, nodding toward the water. Again Carl shrugged and Beth realized the boy was Fort Knox at this moment. Whatever was spoken between Rick and Daryl that prompted his following along with her wasn't coming out of him and Beth felt a small ball of frustration well up.
She'd been doing well. Doing her best not to hurt herself. Telling herself that it never did much good anyways, even though she knew that was a complete lie. Not when she knew that the tears that came when she watched her mother rip her brother apart for the umpteenth time would dry up with a simple ache elsewhere. That the pain in her chest would go away with one simple move. Even catching herself when she felt her nails scratching at her skin. Deciding then that she needed to find something else to do and sought out Carol to help with the mending of the laundry.
Shaking off the anger at the young boy, she focused on retrieving the water instead. Knowing it wasn't his fault. He was merely following orders, doing his best to make it sound so casual. When they reached the river, he was the one that knelt down to fill the pale. Making sure not to spill so much out as he stood up and turned. By then, Beth had put a hand over her eyes to block the sun as she looked at the trees nearby. They looked familiar. Something she'd seen on her farm once or twice when her eyes caught something red on one of the branches. The smile that spread across her face was more of a mischievous grin as she looked to Carl.
"You see that?" she asked, pointing up.
Carl followed her line of sight, his own grin spreading as he spotted what she did. "Cherries," he said, the word's almost melting on his lips as he looked to Beth. He placed the pale down, moving toward the tree. "Give me a lift. I think I can get to them."
Beth nodded, placing her ax against the trunk before linking her fingers together to give the boy a lift. She knew they wouldn't be able to get all of them, not with the pale already filled with the needed water, but a few handfuls worth would be nice. Give them a chance to know if they were any good or not. She watched his ascent, barely focusing on her surroundings as Carl climbed higher. His hand wrapping around his first cherry when a twig snapping caught her attention and she whirled. Her gaze falling on a tall man dressed in a rather large jean jacket with fur on the inside. His clothes were ripped and dirty, much like her own, and his hair was unkempt and greasy. Looking like it hadn't been touched, even before the fall of the world.
Beth took a step back, her hand moving back to look for the ax when she realized that she moved further from the tree trunk then first believed. So focused on the idea of the sweet fruit up above she hadn't realized she been moving backwards. Didn't even notice another person creeping up on them. She cursed herself for her stupidity, knowing she was going to hear an ear full not just from Daddy, but Daryl and the others as well. They were all going to curse her for this.
"What do we got here," he asked, a grin spreading across his face to reveal a whole slew of yellow teeth. Beth grimaced, doing her best to breath past the lump that was forming in her throat. She didn't like the look in his eye. The way they slide over her body and then back on her face. He either didn't notice Carl still in the tree or he didn't care. Beth really hoped for the former as she took another step back, still looking to find her ax.
"You out here by yourself sweet cheeks?"
Beth shook her head, her throat tightening as words failed her. She really wanted to look up and see what Carl was doing. If the boy had his gun out and was ready to aim, but she didn't want to draw attention to him either. She had to have faith that he wasn't up there froze as well. She knew he had more experience in killing the walkers than she did. Handled that gun of his pretty well, but didn't know how he would do having to kill a living being. Hell, she didn't know if she could even do it as the man took another step toward her.
The man took a look around, sucking on his lower lip like he was thinking about something while he noted the old wheel that wasn't far from their spot by the river. "Pretty isolated out here?" Beth didn't respond as the man rubbed at his jaw. "Maybe we could go back to my camp."
Beth shook her head, whatever made her hold her silence before made her blurt out, "no" now.
"Come on, I could take care of you." The man took another step forward, his hand reaching out to grab her arm when Carl jumped down beside him, gun raised to the man's head.
The man froze, his eyes scanning over the young boy and the gun in his hand. "Huh," he said, glancing at Beth. "Two kids out here, all alone. Doesn't sound too good," he said, emphasizing the last part. The amusement in his eyes told her he'd already dismissed Carl. Even with the gun to his head, he didn't look too worried about it, and that made Beth take another step back. Keeping her gaze locked on the man's even as she strained to hear anything else. No one wandered around by themselves now and days. No one as calmly as he is anyways.
"Come back to camp. Got some friends there. We could watch over you." Again his eyes traveled over Beth before glancing at Carl.
Carl took a step closer to Beth just as she grabbed a hold of her ax. "We're fine, thanks," he said, keeping his gun raised. The man glanced at something behind Beth, sending her on high alert as she prepared herself for anything. What she wasn't prepared for was someone grabbing her from behind. The man yanking her ax from her the moment Carl's gun went off. She looked up to see he attempted to shoot their original attacker only to miss and be knocked down. Beth felt her own breath leave her lungs as the man leaned her over, pressing himself tighter against her as he chuckled in her ear. His stank breath going across her face, choking her up as she turned away from him. Doing her best to break free.
"Keep it up, honey. Love it when they squirm." The man chuckled again, his nose pressing against her neck as Beth shivered. The nausea welling up inside of her, forcing her to swallow it back down while thinking about her current position. It wasn't good. The man held her arms close to her chest, his fingers sliding against her front as he pressed closer. Making it hard to maneuver her legs. She looked over to see that Carl was having his own struggle. The man managed to pull the gun from his grasp, and land a hard slap across Carl's face. Beth fumed at that. Just the sight of her friend helpless moved her into action.
"Asshole," she muttered, pulling her leg up to slam it down on the man's foot. His grip loosened as a few curses streamed from his mouth, allowing Beth to pull her arms free and slam her elbow into his side. The man doubled over, releasing her in the process and she flew to her ax. Not thinking as she grabbed it up, turning to see the man already coming at her and she swung it. The blade landing in the man's abdominal. As he fell over, Beth brought the ax up a second time and slammed it into the man's head. Leaving his head split open with blood and other matter spilling out as he falls to the ground.
The man on top of Carl looked up. His face contorting into one of rage as he mumbled, "Fuckin bitch. That was my brother. You're gonna pay for that."
Beth froze. Her head spinning as she tried to calm herself. The sight of the first man still lingering below her as the other man shoved off the ground, forgetting about Carl at that moment as he rushed toward her. Beth swung her ax back aiming at his middle in the same way she did the last man, but he turned at the last minute and the blade hit his side. The man fell, his hand coming up to cover the wound as he snarled at her. Beth stood there, fingers clenched tight around the ax as the man forced himself to his feet, his breathing coming in gasps. When he stepped toward her, something slammed into his chest, causing him to stumble look of shock across his face was momentary as he looked at the blood seeping through his shirt before he looked up at Carl. The boy came closer while the man fell to his knees, allowing Carl a clean shot at his head.
The man fell back and Beth dropped her ax, her own knees giving out as she looked at the two bodies. Carl seemed to feel the same relief as her as she shoulder's sag. The fear going out in one whoosh as he turned to look at her. Taking in the blood splattered across her front. Beth looked as well, just noticing the first few buttons missing on her shirt, leaving more skin than she cared to show, revealed but she couldn't find it in herself to care.
Beth looked back up at him, already willing herself to go numb because she knew if she felt this, there would be no going back. She couldn't even bring herself to look at the bodies anymore. Not having it in her to know that she was the cause of their demise. Even if they were going to be hers.
"The others are waiting," Carl said, his own voice monotone as he said the words. Beth nodded, pulling herself to her feet. Grabbing the ax that rested on the ground, they trudged back to the house. Carl barely remembering to grab the pale of water that was their original target. The cherries momentarily forgotten, though Beth didn't think she could eat cherries again. Not without dredging up this memory.
They stumbled into the house, both of them expressionless as they came through the door. Lorie was the first to notice them, her eyes going wide as she took in Beth's bloody figure and Carl's torn up clothes. "Carl, Beth!" Her shouts rang through the house, catching the attention of everyone else. Beth could hear their footsteps running toward them as Lorie stumbled forward, pulling Car closer to look him over. "What happened?" she asked, her gaze going to Beth.
Beth looked at her for a moment before her eyes went to Maggie, who was already standing in front of her. Her sister's eyes wide with fear, as she looked her up and down. Beth could feel the blood soaking into her shirt, sticking to her skin and she shuddered as she took a deep breath. "There were a couple of men, by the water," she mumbled, eyes traveling over the group until they rested on Daryl. He stiffened at the words, his grip tightening on the strap of his crossbow. "They tried..." her words trailed off as she thought about what they wanted from her and Carl. "Their..." again her voice failed as she closed her eyes, knowing now was not the time to cry.
"We took care of them," Carl finished. The words so emotionless, so nothing that it caused Beth to shiver. Just the tone of it making her wonder how he dredged that up. How he managed to hold onto that calm that was steadily seeping away from her now that she was in the safety of her family.
"Took care of them?" Rick asked, pulling his son's shoulder so that he was facing him and not his mother.
Carl nodded, facing his Dad with that cold stare. "What you told us to do. What we had to do."
Beth cringed, not wanting to remember the feel of her ax slamming into the man's stomach. The nausea welling up again as she remembered with perfect clarity the sight of the ax breaking through bone, and the way the blood seeped out from around it. 'What we had to do,' she repeated to herself, falling into her father's embrace as the meaning of Carl's words sunk into the group around them. There was a collective gasp and when she opened her eyes, she noticed Daryl's hard stare.
The silent question of 'are you okay?' being conveyed through his expression. When she nodded, his focus went to Rick, and she pulled back long enough to see Rick nod toward the door before Daryl pushed past them. His hand brushing across her elbow momentarily before moving past while her sister grabbed her arm. Leading her upstairs and into one of the bathrooms to helpe her wipe the blood off. Beth helped as much as she could. Wanting to scrub harder, make the skin disappear with the blood that touched her arm. Really wanted to peel her skin off, and so she tried. Rubbing harder until her pale skin turned red from the force and the towel was taken from her. Her hands stilled by two stronger ones that she forgot was there until she looked up at her sister through the blurry tears that she didn't even know were there.
"Beth," she whispered, putting her hands on either side of her face. "It's okay."
Beth shook her head, more tears streaming down her face as a sob broke out. "They wanted. The things they said.. What they were going to do..."
Maggie nodded, her own tears appearing as she yanked Beth into another embrace. Allowing her to cling onto something real. Something solid. That's what her sister was; a solid force. One that couldn't be argued with or denied. Those men wouldn't have underestimated her. They would have looked at her and knew there was trouble coming. Knew that subduing the older woman wouldn't be so easy. Maybe it was a good thing they underestimated her and Carl. Made the fight a little easier. Made them relax a bit, and believe they had this one nailed down.
She clenched her eyes shut. Gripping her sister that much tighter as the tears continued to fall and the sobs came. Maggie continued holding her, her own grip just as tight even as she brought a hand up to run it through her hair. Doing what their mother would do to calm her down. To make it all seem to be okay. She wanted her mother now. Wanted to feel herself wrapped up in that woman's arms where all the troubles seemed to go away. Where nothing bad could ever seem to happen. Her body ached with the want of it. So much so, that she could feel herself sobbing harder from the loss all over again. The knowledge that it wasn't ever going to happen hitting her so hard that more tears streamed down her face.
She didn't know how long she stood there in Maggie's embrace. Crying for everything that they lost. For everything that they were going to lose. The inevitable that was going to happen no matter how hard they fought against it. She cried until she didn't have it in her to cry anymore and she allowed Maggie to pull her out of the bathroom and into another room connected to it. Didn't argue as Maggie guided her to the bed and whispered, "you need to rest."
Beth nodded, crawling onto the soft mattress, not bothering to cover up until Maggie pulled a throw blanket over her. It was warm and soft, but Beth still shivered. Doubting that she would ever get warm again. Knowing that the coldness seeping into her now was something that would stay forever. A stain on her innocence that would slowly be ripped away from her.
"Don't leave," she whispered, watching as Maggie walked around the room.
"I'm not," she replied, going around the bed so that she could crawl next to her sister. "I'm going to be right here."
Beth nodded, her eyes focusing on Maggie as she gripped her hand. Holding onto it like a lifeline even as forced herself to sleep. Telling herself, she wasn't going to hurt herself. That she could handle this pain. That this would pass, and she would be fine. That everything thing would be fine, even as a voice inside of her head whispered, 'that's a lie if I ever heard one.'
Beth wasn't sure how long she slept. She just knew it was sunset when she came into the room and pitch black now, except for the small candle burning by the doorway. She could see a rather large figure standing just beyond the room. The shadow of a crossbow on his back told her who it was, and Beth relaxed a little. Just knowing that he was near causing her to breath easier.
Until the conversation came back to her.
"You sure she did most of those killings?" Maggie asked, the tremble clear in her voice.
Daryl nodded. "Yeah, both bodies had wide gaps that are only made by an ax. A clumsy one, but still an ax." Beth shut her eyes tight, biting her tongue to keep the bile from rising in her stomach. She didn't want to remember those men. Didn't want those images in her mind anymore. Could barely look at her own hands without seeing the blood on it. Unconsciously, her nails dug into the palm of her hands. Doing something to relieve the ache that was slowly starting to form in her chest.
"But Carl said," Maggie began, denial still in her voice.
Again Daryl shook his head. "He got a couple of shots off, but it was Beth that did most of the damage. The man that Carl killed would have died anyways with the wound that Beth inflicted on his side."
"Damn" Maggie muttered, sadness now seeping into her tone. Beth closed her eyes, feeling the tears well up again as her nails dug deeper. She could feel the flesh breaking now, the small bit of warmth filling her palm.
"She sleepin in there?" Daryl asked. Beth opened her eyes just as he turned his head away.
"She is, was. I don't know. She's restless."
"Yeah," he mumbled, looking at her again. This time she could swear that their gazes connected for a mere moment before he turned to Maggie again. "Go on, go get some food. I'll keep an eye on her."
"I'll bring some back to her," Maggie said, her voice already drifting away.
"Don't think it'll be needed, but you can try."
Maggie's footsteps grew lighter, eventually disappearing as Daryl turned into the room. Beth sat up, her head spinning for a moment from the quick movement before focusing on Daryl standing at the end of the bed.
"Knew you were awake," he said, walking around until he could prop himself on the edge against the headboard. Beth pushed herself back until she was resting next to him.
"You know everything," she muttered.
Daryl scoffed at that, reaching his hand out to pull her's toward him. Straightening out her fingers so that they weren't digging into her palm anymore, allowing his thumb to run across the fingernail marks now embedded into her skin. "Not everythin," he muttered, continuing to run his thumb across her palm as he looked up at her.
"How you feelin?"
Beth shrugged, not sure how she felt and not willing to explore it. Right now she was numb. The tears from before draining her of any emotion and she didn't want to dredge all that up again. Didn't want to think about it really.
Daryl nodded, like he understood that response completely. "Remember the first time I killed a man." Beth glanced up at him, expecting him to tell her about the time he killed Dale. Explain how it was a mercy killing and Beth already knowing that wasn't the same thing. There wasn't anything merciful in how she wanted to kill those men.
"It was just before the infection," he continued, shocking her. "Merle had gotten in deep with this real bad crowd. Owed them a pretty penny that he just didn't have. Wound up running into them at a bar one night where they dragged him out back. I was just coming in after a day of work. Was the only one that worked at the time, and caught them just as they led him out. Followed them to find my brother pinned up against the wall with a knife to his throat. Didn't even think, just reacted as I grabbed a crowbar and slammed it aside the man's head, crushed it. I know I did the moment he fell and his buddies reacted to bring me and Merle down. We ran that night. Knowing full well that the police would be looking for us. Went off the grid for a while."
Beth swallowed, the light reflecting off of his as they glanced up at her. She could see the pain and doubt reflecting in them. Making her wonder if that was her feelings. If she was doubting her own moves as she leaned her head against his shoulder and muttered, "you did what you had to."
"So did you."
Silence filled the room, making the air seem heavier as they sat there. The words echoed in her mind, causing her to take a deep breath to force the tears back. She knew that. Knew it was an us or them situation. She was glad to be alive. Glad that Carl was unharmed, but still couldn't get the feeling of the man's blood off of her. Couldn't forget the way he made her skin crawl as he touched her.
"Don't make it any easier."
"Nah, it don't." Daryl squeezed her hand, turning his face enough to leave a slight kiss on the top of her head. "Don't make it better at all."
Okay, so for those that are going to be questioning why Carl didn't just shoot the guy. Let explain my thinking. Carl at this point of the story is still young. Yes, he's off killing walkers and what not left and right. Yes, he shot Shane, after Shane was already dead and going after his father. At this point. Carl hasn't had to actually kill a living being. Plus, I don't think Carl get's real trigger happy until after he had to shoot his own mother. I think that was his emotional break. So yes, I see him hesitating here. Hoping that the guy will take the message to back off when he pops up with his own weapon. No matter how bad of a feeling the guy gives them. Remember it's still early in the apocalypse and there's no real reason to just be shooting strangers. Yet.
Obviously that wasn't the case, but that's my reasoning behind it. I do hope you enjoy this chapter. if you haven't heard Ghost Town by Madonna. Then you should. Especially, at the end when it's just her and Daryl talking. I know that part is short, sorry.