The room was deafly silent, Oin touched Ali's face but received no response. Bilbo grabbed Thorin's arm and squeezed tight, as if Bilbo were using him as an anchor to keep from falling. Thorin was no anchor though, vaguely he felt his knees hit the boards as he continued to watch Ali. But her eyes didn't move to follow him.
"No, oh no no no, come on lassie," Bofur patted her cheek, moving to check her pulse. Oin had already checked, but it didn't matter, Thorin could feel nothing.
"Do something!" Bilbo insisted, darting forward only to be pulled back by Gloin.
"If there was sumtin' ta be done, it be done by now!" Gloin growled as Bifur began to cry against Bombur, who merely wrapped him in a hug as tears showed on his cheeks.
It was strange, Thorin felt that in all this commotion he would feel something. Sadness, anger, but no, he felt nothing. As if he wasn't even in his body anymore, as if this wasn't real, couldn't be real.
"Thorin," Dwalin yanked him up by his jacket, Thorin looking over at his lifelong friend. "Thorin, talk ta me."
Looking around all eyes had turned to him, dumbly he opened his mouth then closed it again. His gaze falling to Ali, still he couldn't speak.
"Its shock," Oin said, touching Ali's face he slid her eyes shut one last time.
Something inside Thorin's chest snapped. He heard words of protest escape his lips as he shoved Bofur out of the way, falling back to his knees beside her. This was too final, as if someone had snapped a book closed mid chapter. There was so much left that was left undone, unsaid.
"Wake up," Thorin begged, "wake up!" He grabbed one of her hands, it was already cool to the touch. "Get up, say something strange, do something now!" Thorin rubbed her hand to try and warm her up, "she's cold, get a blanket," he snapped at them.
"Thorin," someone said but he cut them off.
"I said get a blanket!" Thorin snapped, turning his attention to Oin. "Well? Keep working on her shoulder!"
Behind him someone grabbed his shoulder, Dwalin knelt beside him. "Thorin, she's gone."
"No!" Thorin snapped at him before turning back to Oin, "get back to work!"
Cautiously Oin cast a glance back at the others but resumed his work. Thorin sat forward and touched her face.
"Come on Ali, wake up, please wake up." Her face was impossibly pale against her dark hair and lashes. Had she always had that little scar on her cheek? How had he not noticed? There was so much he didn't know about her. What did he actually know? How could he not admit these feelings until it was too late? "I swear, if you open your eyes I'll tell you everything, how I feel, what you mean to me. I'll be there for you, I'll listen to you, I'll…I'll…anything, just wake up for me." Thorin was begging now, completely ignoring whatever it was that Balin was saying right now.
This couldn't be the end, their story wasn't long enough yet, this wasn't how it was supposed to go. Bowing his head he touched his lips to her cold cheek.
Groggy, cold, and nauseous Ali opened her eyes again. She had to stop waking up like this. Oh god she was cold. Lolling her head she looked around her, this was her decision she reminded herself as a wave of pain made her blink.
Around her the dwarves were in different levels of emotion, from sadness to panic. Bifur was crying into Bombur's chest but even though his cheeks were still wet Bombur's jaw dropped open in shock. Dori had grabbed both of his brother's jaws and spun them to see Ali. Gloin dropped an equally shocked Bilbo who had immediately ceased arguing with him over something. Fili and Kili looked equally overjoyed and confused, but jumped to find something. Bofur pulled her attention as he grabbed his hat, opening and closing his mouth without a sound. Balin and Dwalin stood back, eyes wide they both glanced to Gandalf who merely smiled.
Then there was Thorin, who was kneeling right beside her, one of her hands trapped between his. He inhaled sharply his eyes darting across her for a split second. Turning Ali saw Oin stopped mid sewing up her shoulder. No one in this room looked as shocked as Oin, in fact for a moment she thought he might have actually frozen, wide eyed, and almost scared.
"Lassie…are you alive?" Oin croaked out, eyes as big as dinner plates.
"Oh god I hope so, cause if not the afterlife hurts more than expected," Ali groaned, her voice coming out scratchy.
Oin actually looked around at the others who had still not moved an inch, as if he were making sure the others were all seeing his as well.
"Not that I don't love the shock and awe but I'm not Wolverine, this won't heal on its own." Ali looked down and regretted it, blood and tissue. "Is that a bone? Oh god I don't wanna know."
Fili and Kili, suddenly reappeared caring armfuls of cloth, "bandages," was all Kili said as Oin broke out of his shock. Ali turned from the sudden commotion that Oin was inciting as he began his patch job, the brothers hovering over him as he rummaged in his bag.
To her surprise Ali found Thorin smiling, one hand touching her forehead. Oh my god I am dead, she thought, though she couldn't figure out if this was heaven or hell.
"I'm sorry," Thorin said, his deep voice gravely, "for how I've acted, for what I've said for not listening to you enough."
"Lassie drink this," Oin grabbed her attention from the other side, shoving a small shot of something against her lips. The drink was definitely gross, as if she had grabbed a wad of grass and dirt and shoved it in her mouth.
Ali was still computing what Thorin had said though after she swallowed and looked back at him. Part of her was expecting him to jump up and say 'gotcha'.
Laughing Ali smiled at him, "where's the joke?" There had to be one somewhere.
"There's no joke, I won't falsify my feelings any longer," Thorin looked dead serious, and what he was saying was totally serious but Ali snickered.
Her head felt light, what was it that Oin had given her?
"I love you," were the last words that she heard as she drifted back to sleep.
"You WHAT!?" Bilbo turned on Thorin the second Ali's eyes slid closed, surprising the entire company. Thorin took a step to the side, unable to stop his reaction, but refused to cower before the hobbit.
"You heard me, I will not repeat those words to you," Thorin gritted his teeth, the little hobbit had recently saved his life he reminded himself.
"Oh I heard you clearly, what I don't understand is what right you have to say those words!" Bilbo's face was beginning to turn red as he took a step towards Thorin. Dwalin put a hand on the hobbits shoulder and it appeared reassuring but Thorin knew that it was tighter than it looked. "You're the one who left her in Rivendell, you're the reason she hid those wounds, you're not even nice, not even remotely. Even if you somehow managed to pull some shred of warmth from that heart of yours, what makes you think she will ever return it?"
Thorin clenched his jaw and let Bilbo rant for a second, reminding himself to be patient. Even the densest could tell that Bilbo was the closest one to Ali, it had to make sense in some way that Bilbo would be upset.
"What gives ya the right ta lay blame for the lassies injuries on Thorin!" Dwalin began to roar but was quickly smacked by Balin.
"It would be wise to keep your voices down while she sleeps," Balin shook his head at both of them, succeeding in gaining a small ashamed look from both.
"When did this 'appen?" Bofur asked from the other side of the bench, Thorin surprised to see him wringing his precious hat in his hands.
"Ali was fine on the cliff," Kili appeared at Oin's side when he motioned for the clean bandages.
"I think she flinched when I helped her up after the eagles dropped up off," Fili ripped one of the blankets into strips.
"Hrmp," Oin touched next to the new stitches, "was a warg bite." Thorin watched as they wrapped the swollen red flesh up. It had happened while he was knocked out. In those few moments that he wasn't around, that was all it took. Guilt knotted in his chest as he watched Ali's lips move in her sleep.
"Twasn't yer fault Thorin," Balin touched his back and smiled at Thorin.
"Yes it was," Bilbo kept his voice down but the venom was still dripping from each word. "If you hadn't run out there to fight the pale orc alone then we wouldn't have had to run after you."
Thorin didn't care though about the anger, "she ran out to fight the pale orc?"
"Yea, gotta hella arm on the little thin'," Bombur nodded.
"But we los' sight of 'er when the eagles showed up," Bofur nodded back to his hat.
The group fell silent, everyone looked at nothing in particular, it was easy to tell what was on their minds though. What had happened after they lost track of her? Thorin still watched Ali as she moved slightly.
Thorin should have listened to his instinct and know something was wrong in the clearing. He could feel that there was something off, but he had allowed his opinion to be swayed.
"My…" Thorin stopped, he had words, but they weren't working right. "I've never been good at listening to my own…feelings," oh Mahal it sounded strange to say that word, "but I won't hide them anymore." Thorin reluctantly turned from Ali to look down at Bilbo. "Ali is my one, this incident has opened my eyes to how strong that bond is, and also how fragile. I understand your objection and hope that as her closest companion I can sway your opinion about how I treat her."
Thorin didn't know if Bilbo looked more confused or angry, all eyes fell on him, waiting for how he would respond.
"What do you mean your 'one'?" Bilbo narrowed his eyes.
What? Thorin was taken aback. He had been ready to defend himself or just allow Bilbo to rant, but not for something so basic.
As if sensing his hesitation Gandalf finally entered this conversation. By now he had taken a seat outside of the circle to smoke his pipe. "It began when Aule created the seven dwarf clans to teach his trade and craft to. The oldest being the Longbeards, or Durin's Folk. Aule became distraught when he realized they were concentrating completely on their craft that their numbers were beginning to dwindle far too low. Their souls were too intertwined with their craft itself to bother with forging any other bonds of the heart. In his haste to rectify the situation Aule split the spirit of each dwarf and placed the other half with another. Doing so he was able to save the race from disappearing. Through the years this has begun to fade as the old blood begins to thin, but it still appears, in varying degrees. A few of those being here in this very room." Gandalf smiled and looked around, Thorin knew of only one, Gloin, but whom else?
"But," Bilbo looked pained at Gandalf and Thorin, "what happens if the other doesn't feel the same?"
Gandalf righted himself slightly as Thorin's eyes darted around the group. There was an uncomfortable shift in the air, Bilbo was the only who didn't know, but it wasn't something often spoke about.
"Well," Gandalf shifted again, looking from Thorin to Bilbo, "it's hard to describe the pains of the heart."
"Is like if yer heart only takes every other beat. Yer life will keep on but ya will miss that one with every beat ya miss of yer heart." Gloin solemnly filled what Gandalf wasn't able to say.
There was a continued silence, it was obvious that the dwarves didn't want to keep talking about this. Thorin didn't blame them, it was known to happen that those who were rejected would often fade into a shadow of what they used to be. As many other dealings of the heart, dwarves often refused to speak of such things.
"I don't wish that for you Thorin," Bilbo grabbed Thorin's hand and squeezed, starting him. "I don't really, but unless you can prove otherwise, I don't know if this will work for you."
This wasn't something he didn't know, something he was forced to think about constantly now. If only he had actually tried when he had first learned that she wasn't Bilbo's wife.
"Hmmmm," Ali mumbled from behind them, dragging everyone's awkward silence to a halt. Thorin turned sharply, kneeling close to Ali, but she wasn't paying him any attention. Reaching out Ali was grabbing at thin air, watching as though there were beside her.
"What are you doing?" Thorin asked, concerned.
"Catch them walking by," Ali mumbled, waving her arm she winced but continued.
"There's no one there," Fili leaned over Thorin's shoulder to whisper to him. Thorin turned only slightly to shake his head, he knew there wasn't anyone there.
Turning sharply Ali looked up at Thorin, confused her eyes darted around the group. Thorin steeled himself, he had to comfort her somehow, she was scared from the looks of it.
"Where's Batman?" Ali whispered, serious about her question.
"Umm, I've never met this man," Thorin said, around him a mumble of agreement rose around them.
"He owes me twenty bucks," Ali frowned at him.
"Why does he owe ya tha' many deer?" Bofur asked squinting as if that would help him see what she was saying.
"Cause of what happened in the invisible jet," Ali blinked really slow, as if remembering something.
"What happened?" Dwalin asked before Thorin.
"Aquaman filled the toilet with goldfish so they could fly." Ali smiled and tried to turn over and go back to sleep but Thorin pulled her back before she could lay on her shoulder. "What happened to my sweater?" Ali asked trying to sit up now, "why is it ripped?"
"Calm down," Thorin tried to sound as soothing as possible, but she continued to struggle to see.
"What happened that was my sweater!" Ali tried to push him off her, slowly gaining strength.
"S'ok lass, had to cut it off, ta git yer shoulder," Oin tried to help but didn't know where to put his hand.
"My shoulder? What happened? What happened to my shirt?" Ali's chest heaved as what Thorin believed to be panic setting in. "That was my shirt, why would you hurt it?"
"No, no, we didn't, I mean we did, not on purpose," Thorin struggled, what did one say? He was going to say it wrong, this wasn't going right.
"It's the meds, makes 'er strange," Oin snorted, he thought this was funny. Thorin couldn't believe Oin right now.
"Here," Thorin glared over at Oin but pulled his tunic over his head. "Take my shirt, it's a special shirt to me so keep it safe." He sounded like an idiot even to himself, but her breathing slowed as he laid it on her chest.
"On Wednesday's we wear pink, but this is a nice blue," Ali smiled down at the shirt, finally resting back.
Thorin nodded to her but didn't know what to say. A man dressed as a bat that rides some strange bread machine owed Ali twenty deer. He didn't even know what to think about gold fish in a toilet, and they all dressed in pink mid-week. Every time he learned something about Ali he was just that much more confused about the land that she was from.
Here we go, yet another chapter for the holiday season!
Alas, I won't have much time to write as my sister fly's in this afternoon
Also I'll be picking up my new cat from the shelter soon :D
AND the last Hobbit movie is out! I hope everyone has either seen it or will soon!
So I thank you for all the wonderful reviews and suggestions
I'll be seeing you guys after the Holidays! Muah!