Chapter Twenty
Daryl stood in the kitchen, watching Carol and Maggie shifted through the food supplies. Their gazes meeting for a moment as they held the last bit of canned food before placing it back in the cupboard and locking it up. Daryl glanced at the food himself, counting the number of mouths were now in the house, and felt his stomach drop.
If they paced it. If they really made the can's stretch and do a good amount of hunting. They should be fine for the next couple of months. Shelter, and warmth wasn't the issue at this point. It was the lack of food that was going to wind up killing them. Especially if they got snowed in during the winter month. Carol glanced at him, giving him a reassuring smile like he wouldn't see the worry in her eyes. Wouldn't be able to add it all up in his head himself.
"We'll be fine," Maggie said, shuffling around. Giving her own smile as she nodding and repeating. "We'll be just fine."
"Yeah," Daryl mumbles, looking up to see a small blonde entering the room. Stopping when she spots him standing there. Visibly swallowing before pulling her gaze away from Daryl and looking to Maggie.
"Daddy's awake," she says, already turning to head back upstairs. There's a gasp and Maggie is following along after her. A smile spread so wide across her face but Daryl can only feel his muscles tense up. Nausea making him sway on his feet as he leans against the counter. How much had Hershel heard. Did he wake up before the screaming fest that just happened upstairs, or after. When she slammed the door, and could have jostled him away then.
"It's good news," Carol says, leaning across the counter from him. That placating smile still firm on her lips as he ducks her head to get a better look at him. Daryl glances at her, a frown forming across his face as he eyes narrow before shaking his head.
"Yeah, real good," he replies, looking away. Focusing on the counter as he starts chewing on his thumb nail.
"Unless you just screamed at his baby girl." Carol's eyebrows shoot up in question. Meeting his for a moment before his gaze goes back to the stairs. Playing the argument over in his head. Almost wincing at some of the things he threw out there. Yeah he was a dick.
An A+ asshole at that.
"You heard all that, huh?"
Carol shrugs. "Some."
Daryl glances around the room, noting the silence in a house that should be buzzing with noise with the amount of people here. "The others?"
"They stepped outside. Maggie's the only one who wouldn't leave in case…" Carol's words trail off as the meaning sets in.
Daryl's stomach twists. The frown on his face deepening as he glares at the woman before him. "In case what?"
Carol shakes her head. "Nothing, forget it."
Daryl whirls, mind buzzing as he contemplates heading upstairs. Giving Maggie a thing or two to think about and deepening that amount of red in an already long ledger. Not that it would matter. Apparently, nothing he does matters because he always be a dirty redneck asshole that their stuck with. That's good for one thing, and one thing only.
"Is that what you think of me?" he shouts, turning to face Carol as she shakes her head. Eyes going wide. Almost pleading with him to let it go.
"You think I would do that to someone?" He points up the stairs, hands visibly shaking as Carol attempts to raises her own hands up in surrender. "To her? To someone I-" He lets the words die on his tongue. Unable to say them, even though Carol's head tils to the side. The sadness in her eyes evident as she holds her hands up in surrender.
"No, Daryl, of course not," she says, resting her palms on the counter to take a deep breath. Remaining calm. Calmer then Daryl would like, and again he's reminded of the barn. The way she just stood there, taking his verbal abuse without a word of defense. Soaking it all in and Daryl almost wishes she would give him something. Either a scream or a silent fury like Beth. Something instead of Carol's almost whispered, "Maggie's just being a big sister, trying to look out for her little sister is all."
Daryl leaned forward, moving as close to Carol as the counter would allow him. "Bullshit," he whispers, meeting her gaze head on. "Like I would physically hurt Beth."
Carol gapes at him. Her eyes going wide as she waves at him, looking him up and down. "Look at what you just did!" Daryl sucks in a deep breath. The words a literal punch to his gut. He flinches like he's been slapped when Carol slams her hand against the counter. Her aggravation finally coming through in a swarm of words. "We've all been through hell, Daryl. Some more so then others, but we've still lived it. Survived it! You owe that girl an apology."
Daryl nods, head bowed in defeat because he knows Carol's right. Knew it the moment he walked out of that room and heard the door slam. His heart nearly breaking from the sounds of her sobbing before storming off. Unable to head back in and admit the obvious, but not able to listen to her either.
"Don't have to be now, or even today, but you better be making things right and soon cause I can only hold her father in that bed for so long." Carol's pointing at him again. A determined look in her eye as his own brows furrow in confusion. Trying to figure out what the hell kind of apology requires Hershel to stay in bed.
"Why the hell would you need to keep Hershel in bed for?" Daryl asked, unable to see the answer written anywhere on her face only to receive a tilt of her head as his friends' eyes dart to the other side of the kitchen and the sound of footsteps echo from the hallway.
"Don't play stupid, Daryl," she says before shoving off the counter and coming around. Daryl follows her retreating figure out of the kitchen. Brows still furrowed as he looks over at Rick. Still completely lost on Carol's last words and shaking his head. Rick smirks at him, his eyes scrunching in amusement.
"You'll figure it out," he says, coming over to lean against the counter. "Just don't run out on us again."
Daryl's head hangs. Not ready -or willing- to have another argument with someone else. Wasn't two enough for one day?
"Just needed to clear my head," he mumbles, running his hands through his hair before looking up at Rick. Hoping the man understands. Judging by the nod of his head, and the thoughtful look on his face. He did.
Confirmed it as he said, "yeah, we've all needed to at one point or another." Rick's gaze landed on the cabinet filled with their canned food. Running his gaze up and down before looking over his shoulder, like he was looking at something that only he could see before looking down at the counter again.
Daryl waits. Keeping silent as the man gathers his thoughts. Knowing that whatever he came in here for wasn't to rehash words that already been spoken. Instead, he looks back at the cupboard and says, "Gonna need to find more food soon. Might have to do another run further out."
Daryl nods. Already considering that when he overheard Maggie and Carol going over the supplies. "Might need to find a bigger space too," he says, glancing behind him to the invisible heads that Rick was counting up not that long ago. "Not at the moment though. We have shelter here, supplies. But eventually, we're going to want more space."
He looks to Rick who is giving his own silent agreement. Chewing on his lips as he stands. "Andrea said her and her friend, Michonne, spotted a prison in the next county."
Daryl stands as well, his brows furrowing as Rick continues. "Said the place was over-run by walkers, but mostly prisoners and guards. Meaning it could have been untouched since the turn."
He scratches at his chin, thinking about all the possibilities that that could mean for them when Rick leans closer. "Could be supplies -food, medicine, weapons. All untouched. All just waiting for us."
Daryl nods, not needing to hear another word as he looks to Rick. "Not to mention the fences, the amount of defenses we would have against the dead alone."
"Exactly," Rick says, his eyes lighting up when he realizes Daryl's on board. "This is place is good, but the prison would be better. We could settle down, grow there. It's something to look into."
Nothing more needs to be said. The two men are in agreement. The decision to be brought up to the rest of the group so that all of them can decide on rather to move or not. Though it's in agreement that they'd scout it out first. See if the place has been taken over, or even worth the risk. Could be something else better out there.
The decision is laid out that night. Most of the people in the group looking excited. Others, like Lorie and Maggie, looking concerned. Daryl can understand that. Lori's pregnancy is progressing. Moving and resettling is hard on her. Maggie's concern can be narrowed down to her father and his one remaining leg. Moving Hershel is going to be hard as well. If they did move, they'd have to give him time to heal and get out of the bed.
These thoughts bring him back to the conversation he had with Carol that afternoon, and his gaze shoots up to the woman in question before zeroing in on Beth at the back of the group, next to her sister and Glenn. Looking just as upset and worried as the brunette standing next to her.
The day moved by in such a blur with his thoughts constantly going over their argument. What he said running like a broken record in his mind and how if he'd just told her why he left then he wouldn't have fought with her. How much easier -and harder- that would have been. The conversation he needed to have with her now wasn't going to be any easier, but she'd forgiven him for his ass-hatery before. Not like she didn't know how much of a dick he could be. Everyone knew it. Knew it from the first day at camp.
Not like he ever hid this from them. Never tried to be anything he wasn't. Didn't mean that was what she deserved. He's contempt and anger could be saved for someone else. Anyone else that really deserved it, but not her. She deserved so much better then that. Daryl planned on telling her that to. Eventually. When he got longer then a minute to be alone with her. Right now he needed to focus on the other issue at hand.
Finding out what this prison had to offer, and when they were leaving. Something Rick was announcing now as he pauses in his speech about the move. "We're going to need to take a few people up there to scout it out. " He starts, meeting everyone's gaze to decipher their feelings on this. Daryl does the same, and notices Beth takes that moment to exit the room. Her arms wrapped tight around herself and even Rick notices as Carl follows along after her.
When the two of them are gone, Rick says, "Andrea and Michonne have already agreed to head out on this trip, I'm hoping a few others will come as well."
"We'll go," Tyresse says, holding his hand up to indicate himself and his sister, Sasha. Rick looks a little unsure at first. Eyeing them for a long moment before Sasha says, "We know Michonne and Andrea and we make a good team. "
"Fine," Rick says nodding his head and looking around some more. Maggie shakes her head as Glenn steps forward, ignoring his girlfriend as he nods at Rick. "I'll go."
"Good, that makes six," Rick says, looking at the rest of them, before glancing at Daryl. His brows already furrowed cause technically that should make seven, including himself because it should be obvious that he would be coming with him.
They were a team. Stuck together through just about everything up to this point. Rick notices the glare coming from him and takes a steps closer, placing a hand on his shoulder. Like that will subdue him. Like that small movement will calm him down when he could feel nothing but betrayal as the man says, "I need you and Merle to stay here and take charge. Make sure nothing happens."
"Bullshit," Daryl blurts, brushing the man's hand off of him. Hating the feeling it invokes. Taking a step back, he looks through the crowd of people. Noting Glenn and Maggie having a whispered discussion in the back and he points to them. "Leave Glenn in charge. He's better at running things here, and it don't look like Maggie wants him to go anyways."
"Daryl," Rick says, head cocked to the side as he stares at him. Daryl can already feel another lecture coming on. Something that's going to piss him off some more, and he takes a step back, already shaking his head to argue as Rick continues. "I need you here. I got new faces here that I don't trust. I got Hershel tied up in the bed, and his two daughters out of commission because of it. The pregnancy's got Lori feeling sick again and you... You are still injured and I need you here to rest and keep an eye on things."
Daryl continues to shake, feeling his legs move to pace the room. Let out some of the frustration because he would be better out there. The woods are a second home to him. It's where he belongs, but he can't argue with Rick's logic either. Just getting here took most of his strength and even with the small nap he took this afternoon after returning, he still feels drained. Going out again would only cause troubles. Troubles that Rick obviously don't need at the moment so he glares at the man. Hates that he's right and growls a short "Fine" before storming off out the front door.
Needing the fresh air, and the moment to breath. Seems like since he returned all he did was get pissed about one thing or another. Starting with Beth and her wanting to know why he left. She should have known why he left. Straight up told her the night before. Hinted at it anyways . Got him thinking he should have said a little more. Cleared the meaning up a bit, though he didn't know how. Never had much practice with expressing his feelings. Always got told they were useless and weak. Just something a coward would think over. Though he was beginning to think it would take more then a coward to sort out one's feelings. Running from them seemed easier, and another thing he was told was running is just as cowardly. Caused just as much problems.
Stifling his thoughts for the time being, Daryl leans against the railing. Trying to take a breather from everything and everyone when voices carry down to him. Barely there whispers that catch his attention and have him bending around to look up and see where they're coming from. Two sets of feet are near the edge of the roof. Carl's voice floating down as he whispers, "They'll be fine. That samurai chick looks pretty bad ass, and there's that big guy" and Beth's answering "yeah, I guess." He pulls further back just in time to see Carl bump shoulder's with Beth, who looks reluctant to smile. The frown on her face contrasting with the happiness she's trying to convey with her tone.
Pain shoots up Daryl's center, causing him to twist back around and bite his cheek. Hold in the groan that will give him away as he squeezes his ribs to subdue the pain. When it passes, Daryl looks around the place. Knowing there's got to be a way up there. Even if it isn't an easy one. The railing along the front porch where it ducks low seems like the best option, so he hops up there. Biting his cheek harder as the pain shooting up his front again and reaches for the roof. Slowly pulling himself up and into the view of the two sitting on the roof. Their chatter dying down when they notice someone joining them.
"What the hell you doin?" Beth asks, almost shouting as they crawl over to help the man up. Even though he's already pulled himself halfway up and has a leg swung over for better leverage.
"What the hell's it look like?" Daryl barks back, managing to scramble onto the roof and sit for a moment. Wincing at the protesting ribs that are threatening to crack under the strain of pulling himself up.
"Looks like you're trying to kill yourself." Her gaze travels down him, noting the way he's cradling his chest and she pushes forward, once again moving to lift up his shirt to take a look at the bruising. "Seriously, Daryl, you should be resting." He shoots her a glare of his own, not wanting to hear her gripe anymore when the deeds already done.
"I think I'm heading back inside," Carl says, looking between the two before heading up the roof and ducking into an open window. Daryl watches his retreat, eyes narrowing as he watches the kid jump from the dresser to the floor and disappears inside.
"Figures," he mumbles, shoving Beth's probing hands a way to scoot further away from the edge. Beth falls back on her bottom, watching him.
"Would have been easier." She gives him a wry smile and he narrows his eyes on her before pulling out the last cigarette he managed to bum from Merle when he returned home.
"I'm crippled, not incapable." He lights it up, taking a long moment to breath in the nicotine. Waiting for her to say something. Anything. To relieve the silence that's fallen between them as she watches him and he does his best to look out toward the forest. When he releases the smoke and still not a word is spoken, he flicks the cigarette and says, "besides, you know how Carol and them are about smoking in the house."
"That's not the point," Beth says, eyes still boring into him, and Daryl meets her gaze for the first time. Remembering why he bothered to come up here in the first place, and as he releases another puff of smoke, ready to actually talk to her when Beth spouts out, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be snapping at you, and that goes for earlier too. It's not my place to know when and why you leave."
Daryl swallows, looking at the little light at the end of his cigarette. Thinking it was more her business then most of people in this house. How if he'd just opened his mouth and told her why he left in the first place the girl wouldn't be here apologizing to him. Acting like she was the one completely in the wrong. So he shrugs, trying to act like her apology didn't mean anything as he says, " I shouldn't have been such an asshole."
This pulls a smile from the girl, his gaze lingering on her lips for a second before peeling them away to look at her eyes. Trying not to jump onto that train of thought and failing miserably as he thinks up someway to get her closer. Get her back in his arms, cause he's not going to lie to himself anymore and deny that he's missed her there. Missed the weight of her pressing against him under the guise of trying to get warm.
"Everyone knows your an ass." That mischievous grin is back on her face and it pulls his own lips up. Glad to see that she's starting to forgive him even as the smile forces him to focus on those lips again.
Clearing his throat, he looks back at the cigarette still in his hand as he mumbles, "doesn't excuse being one to you."
"What makes me so special?" she asks. The question innocent enough, but it clogs his throat. Makes every word he thought he was going to say fly out of his head because he's asked himself the same question a million times. From the moment he decided to stop her from harming herself. Wondering why the hell he should care if she offed herself. At least it would have been on her terms. The way she wanted to go, but he couldn't allow it. Couldn't stand to see her do that, and so found ways to stop her. 'Distract her,' as he put it and now she's asking that same question and he still don't have an answer for it. So he shrugs and mumbles something unintelligible while taking another long draw on his cigarette, noting that it's nearly at the end and wishing he had another one to finish this conversation.
"Don't idontknow," she says, scooting closer. Slowly moving until she's kneeling in front of him. Mere inches from where she was moment's ago and asks. "What makes me so special?"
Daryl sucks in a deep breath, the cigarette now completely useless as he puts it out on one of the shingles. Watching it turn the spot to black before locking his gaze with Beth's. Her eyes wide and curious while waiting for an answer that Daryl just can't seem to grasp in his mind, much less push it past the hole in his face and so he does the only thing he can really think of to get the answer across.
The only thing he is ever really good at. Take action.
They always said action's speak louder then words, and he prays that this one screams his meaning across as he snakes his hand out to wrap around the back of her neck and pulls her closer as he leans forward. Praying to whatever god above that she doesn't bolt. That this small action doesn't completely scare her away from him. Cause it's not a small thing. It's big. Bigger then Daryl can probably handle at the moment, but after T-Dog and his own near death experience he knows that putting something like this off anymore would just be plan stupid.
So he does it.
He let's his lips brush across hers. Barely a caress. Barely enough to feel the softness of those lips that have caught his attention more times then he cares to admit before pulling away. Preparing himself for the rejection. For the "I'm sorry's and I don't see you that way's." Cause their coming. He knows they are. She's still too young, and he's a dirty old pervert for even looking at her like that and she's going to know this now. Going to see all his darkness for what it really is and do the smart thing. She's going to run as far and as fast as she can and Daryl can't blame her. Won't even hold it against her.
As he pulls back, their faces still scant inches apart, Daryl looks into her eyes. Expecting the wide-eyed stare, but it's not disgust or fear that's staring back at him. It's surprise and a little breathless smile as a small little "oh" pops out of her mouth followed by an even bigger grin.
Daryl barely has a moment to register that smile spreading across her lips before Beth's tangling her fingers in his hair and pulling him in for another kiss. This one firmer then the last. Their lips crashing together in a long slow caress as she moves her lips against his. Tilting her head for the better angle as both arms wrap around his neck. Securing him to her at the same time his other hand comes up to wrap around her back, pulling her closer until they are flush against each other and he can feel her heat mixing with his own. His heart pounding against her's while his other hand slips up and tangles in her hair. Holding her there for several minutes, not wanting to let her go and see that she's come to her senses.
She doesn't though.
As they pull apart. Both are breathless and a little surprised from the moment. Beth leans her forehead against his. Her eyes close with a smile still there and Daryl follows her lead. Closing his own eyes to soak up the moment. To remember every touch. Every smell. The way the cold wind brushes against his skin, sending goosebumps up his flesh that he'll never be able to recall if it is from the wind or from the fact that Beth's in his arms. Wrapped up tight against him like he'd been wanting and shaking just as heavily as he is.
When he opens his eyes again, it's to lean forward and place another kiss on her lips. Now that he knows what they feel like on his own, he knows he's going to be like an addict and never get enough. Not that Beth seems to be complaining. She seems just as eager for another kiss as she moves her lips against his. Just as slow as the first time before pulling away, tilting her head at a new angle and kissing him again. Repeating the movements until a giggle escapes her. Daryl pulls back at the sound, moving his hand from her hair to her cheek, and caressing it as his other hand loosens it's hold on her back to rest on her hip. Still keeping her close. Still able to feel the pounding of her heart that matches his own rhythm. Still not wanting to let go in case she changes her mind and never lets him touch her again.
A shiver runs up her spine and she place her head on his shoulder, curling into him as he runs his hands up her arm to warm her up. "Should head inside," he says, whispering the words into her ear. Loving the shiver that runs down her spine as she nods. Wondering if that one was from the cold, or from him. He likes to think that he has that kind of effect on her. Would be a plus, but he isn't holding out any hope as she pulls away, still smiling at him like he just made her day, or whole year, he can't be sure.
"Through the window this time?" Beth asks, that smile turning mischievous again and Daryl rolls his eyes. A small "hmph" leaving him as he catches her chin between his thumb and forefinger to pull her close and leave a peck on her lips. One that turns into another lingering kiss before they both pull away.
"Or you scared my father going to get out of bed and chase you with a shot gun?" The wicked gleam in her eyes tales him she's kidding, but the image settles in his head and he has to stand to get away from her to shake it off. Only stopping long enough to hold a hand out to help her up and lead her toward the window. Toward their family that is going to see what they've done and know what it means, and at the moment he fears Maggie's reaction more then Hershel's. Though he knows he is going to have to sit down and talk with the old man eventually, and won't that be a fun opportunity.
Okay, so here's the make-up and the move along plot. Sort of. Kinda scared to post this one cause it took me forever to figure out where to go with it and then remembered this is a sort of "fix it" slightly AU story and so why not have a slightly AU "fix it" moment. Not exactly what they said, or where they were sitting but it's there and what Daryl did here is kinda what I wished he would have done in the funeral home, but oh well. Here ya have it. Enjoy it and until next time cause I guess this isn't the final chapter. Though it could have been. Should have been. Anyways. Thanks for the continued support, even after the long waits.