I'd like to thank winterschild11, Charlie-Rose94, cicibunbuns, and annabellex2 for all taking the extra time to review.
Chapter 31: The Fear of Falling Apart
Leora paced around her room. She was waiting for Caleb to show up. He had called her and asked her to go out tonight. He had some free time and he wanted to see her. Leora was happy that he had called. They didn't get much time together with him working and doing essays for college applications.
Leora's phone buzzed and she grabbed it seeing Caleb's name flash across her screen. She took off down the stairs hollering that she would be back later. She got a vague response that seemed like an 'ok.'
Caleb was sitting outside in his car. He waved to her. She quickly slipped into the car. She greeted him with a peck on the lips.
"Oh, hello," Caleb said with a smile.
"Hi," Leora replied. "So what are we gonna do?" She asked as he started driving.
"I don't know, maybe the mall," Caleb said shrugging.
The two rode in silence for a bit. Leora could tell something was on Caleb's mind. He was never this quiet without a reason.
"Is everything ok," Leora asked.
"I don't know, maybe," Caleb said.
"If something's wrong you can tell me," Leora said.
"Leora you know I've been applying to colleges right?" Caleb asked.
"Yeah, why are you brining this up," Leora asked. There had to be only one reason he was bringing this up.
"I got into Berkeley," Caleb said avoiding looking at Leora.
"Your first choice," Leora said bobbing her head.
"I care about you a lot Leora," Caleb started.
"But," Leora said quickly.
"But this is my life. I want to go to college and get a good job," Caleb said.
"I know, I get it. I want that too. I mean we knew this would happen sooner or later," Leora sighed.
Caleb pulled over and shut the engine off. He turned to face Leora. "I don't want to loose you Le, I care about you way too much," he said.
"So what are you saying," Leora asked.
"I don't know," Caleb sighed.
The two sat there in silence. Leora looked out the window before speaking.
"I'm not gonna stop you from following your dream Caleb, if you want to go to Berkeley then go. I don't want to hold you back," Leora said.
"That's just it though, I have no idea what I want to do with my life," Caleb said quickly shaking his head.
"I thought you wanted to become a entertainment lawyer," Leora said slowly.
"I don't know, I've been thinking more and more and as it gets closer and closer I realize that I have no idea what I really want to be. A lawyer sounds nice, but I am barely scraping by with my grades," Caleb said shaking his head. "Sure I have sports but I'm not as good as those kids who get scholarships. I have no clue what I want to do with my life," he said.
"You don't mean that, there has to be something you want to do," Leora said softly. She hated seeing him like this.
"The only thing that makes sense right now is you," Caleb admitted.
Leora blushed at that. She looked over at him and saw him looking at her. His eyes held nothing but admiration and love in them.
"Yeah but I've still got another year of high school left," Leora said, "with you in college this won't be practical. I mean there are gonna be other girls and you might meet someone. I just don't want you tied down and then to do something stupid."
"I've been thinking about that too. What if you meet someone else. You're really pretty Leora. There are guys who look at you, I'm not dumb," Caleb said.
"If you love me, let me go," Leora said fighting back tears. "Let me go and if it's meant to be, we'll come back to each other," She said.
"Are we breaking up?" Caleb asked.
"I think so," Leora said slowly.
"Well, we don't have to right now," Caleb said slowly, "I don't graduate for a few more months," he said.
"Well then, let's make the most of what time we have left," Leora said thoughtfully.
-We Are-
Logan yawned as he followed Layla, Erika, and Millie through the mall. Carlos was working and he was stuck with chaperone duty. He didn't mind, the girls were having fun. They ran from shop to shop looking at everything. Logan hung back and gave them some privacy.
"Dad!" Layla said running up to him with some clothes on her hands.
"One," Logan said.
"But dad," Layla whined.
"No buts," Logan said sternly. Layla sighed and turned back to the others. She put a few things back.
Layla laughed as she talked with the two. Logan smiled as was glad she was having fun.
Logan had his back to the girls when he heard them talking about a dance. He listened carefully.
"So Millie, the Sadie Hawkins dance is coming up," Erika said.
"Oh yes, any boys you gonna ask?" Layla asked excitedly.
"I don't know, I was thinking maybe Tanner," Millie said slowly.
"Oh my god yes, he's so cute," Layla said.
"Not cuter than me though right?" Erika asked.
"No way, you're the cutest," Layla replied.
"You guys are so adorable," Millie gushed.
Logan smiled as he listened to the three talk a bit more. He did not like the idea of Layla dating this young, but at least she was happy. He heard mention of a dress and sighed. He would have to buy Layla a dress soon. It would be worth it to see her smile. Logan had to face facts his baby girl was growing up. He wondered if maybe he could talk her into one of Lilly or Leora's old dresses.
-We Are-
Miles followed Rion up to her bedroom. Her parents were out for the night and it was just the two of them.
"So I was thinking maybe watch some Netflix and chill," Rion said as they entered her room.
"Sure," Miles said
Rion set up Netflix and told him to pick a movie. She then left to go get some snacks.
Miles sat down on her bed and started searching through movies. He settled on a gory movie, I loved that he and Rion had very similar tastes in movies.
Rion returned with some popcorn and a couple of sodas. She was pleased with his choice. The pair got settled on the bed and started the movie.
"I love this movie I've seen it like a hundred times," Rion admitted.
"Me too," Miles chuckled.
As the movie played the two would quote their favorite parts and laughed at each other. Once the popcorn was finished Rion set the bowl aside and snuggled closer to Miles. He placed his arm around her.
Miles grew a bit bored after awhile. He started tracing random patterns on Rion's shoulder. She giggled and pushed his hand away. Miles persisted though. The two started play fighting until Miles had Rion pinned on the bed.
They locked eyes for a moment. Miles leaned down and kissed her. Rion bummed in response and pulled him down closer. Miles moved his lips to her neck. He had discovered it was sensitive spot of hers. He nipped and kissed his way down her neck. He started unbuttoning her shirt. It opened to reveal her bra. Miles looked up at her. He would only do this if she wanted it.
"Go ahead," Rion said with a smile. Miles leaned up and captured her lips on another kiss.
-We Are-
Kyle bit his lip as he sat outside the Palm Woods in the parking lot. He was debating on talking to Jared. Was Lilly right, should he just ask him?
There was only two ways this could turn out. It was either Jared did make a move on Kendall, or he didn't. There was no middle ground here. Kyle was just scared. He was scared that Jared wasn't interested in him. Had this all just been a game to him? Why would Jared like someone like Kyle?
Kyle shook his head. He was being ridiculous. He never would've agreed to date Jared if there wasn't some kind of connection there. Was he blinded by love?
Kyle decided to just bite the bullet. He had to do this. He quickly got out of his car. He made his way up to the second floor, to Jared's apartment. He stopped at the door and knocked.
The door opened to reveal Noah. He greeted Kyle with a smile.
"Is Jared here," Kyle asked nervously.
"Yeah, he's in his bedroom," Noah said stepping aside. Kyle thanked him as he made his way to Jared's room. He knocked on the door. Without waiting for a reply he opened the door.
Jared was sitting on his bed reading. He glanced up as the door slipped shut. A smiled spread across his lips at the sight of Kyle. He stood, setting his book aside, and greeted the young blonde.
"What are you doing here?" Jared asked.
"We need to talk," Kyle said slowly.
"Should I be worried?" Jared asked as he walked over to Kyle.
"I don't know, it all depends on your answer," Kyle said slowly as he walked around Jared. Jared arched a brow at the blonde in confusion. Kyle felt his heart start to race. He was so scared of the answer he might get to this question. "What happened between you and my dad?"
"What do you mean?" Jared asked slowly as he moved closer to Kyle.
"Last week, when I forgot my laptop I came back to get it and I over heard you and Roldy talking. Tell me I am imagining things. Tell me I'm crazy," Kyle said.
Jared sighed and hung his head. "Kyle look," he started.
"Oh my god, you made a move on my dad didn't you?" Kyle asked taking a step back from Jared.
"Look, you don't understand," Jared said quickly.
"Understand what? Kyle asked disgusted. "You made a move on my dad and you're not denying it. Did you ever really care about me? Is this just a way to get back at my dad?" He asked.
"It's not like that Kyle, it was a mistake. I was drunk and it was before I even met you. It meant nothing, I was having some issues with my family and I started drinking and I made a mistake," Jared said.
"Family issues, that's your go to excuse isn't it?" Kyle asked shaking his head.
"Yes I just chose to have a dysfunctional family, so I could always used them as an excuse," Jared snapped.
"God I'm stupid, why would you ever be interested in me," Kyle snapped.
"God you are such a brat," Jared said.
"Screw you," Kyle spat.
"Look Kyle, please just listen to me," Jared pleaded with the young blonde.
"Listen to what? You never wanted me. I was an idiot to think that you did," Kyle said shaking his head.
"Stop it, look it didn't mean anything. I was drunk and not thinking clearly," Jared said trying to get Kyle to listen to him.
"No, they say drunken words are sober thoughts. I get it, he's got what you always wanted fame. You'll do whatever it takes to get noticed. I never was yours was I?" Kyle asked.
"Oh stop it. You are acting like a child," Jared said angrily.
Kyle stood there shocked.
"Fuck you Jared," Kyle spat as he gathered himself. He stormed from the room. He marched right past Noah and Roldy who were looking at him confused.
"Kyle wait," Jared hollered as he ran after him. Kyle paused for a moment before he turning to face Jared.
"No, I am done. You are an ass and I'm done," Kyle said.
"You don't mean that, look it was a mistake and in the past. I am not trying to spite your dad. I care about you," Jared said desperately.
"No I'm done falling for the smooth talk, it never really meant anything did it? I'm leave me alone," Kyle said.
Jared looked pleadingly at him. Kyle just shook his head and ran from the apartment. Kyle made his way out to the parking lot. He reached his car as the tars finally fell. He let out a small scream of aggravation. He kicked the front tire of the car. He looked back to the building behind him. He shook his head and climbed into the car.
The whole time they had been dating Jared had never said that. Even through all their argument he had never called Kyle that. He always told Kyle he never seemed like a kid to him. He always called him mature for his age. It was all a lie. Kyle now knew how he really felt.
He started driving. He just needed to get away from this place and away from Jared.
-We Are-
Lilly yawned as she made her way down to the kitchen in search of food. Everyone was out and she was home alone. She wasn't expecting anyone back any time soon. Lilly decided on making a ham and cheese sandwich. She finished making her sandwich when her phone beeped. She checked it and saw Kyle had texted her. She opened the text.
You were right, can I talk to you?
Lilly replied quickly telling him to come over. Not even second later there was a knock at the door. Lilly jumped shocked at how quick he was. She answered the door and saw Kyle standing there. He didn't look too happy.
"Come in," Lilly said grabbing his hand and leading him into the house. She took him upstairs. "What happened?"
"He made a move on my dad," Kyle said shaking his head as he sunk down not her bed. Lilly sat down beside him.
"Are you sure, did you give him a chance to explain," Lilly asked.
"Yes, he did not deny it and brought up how crappy his family is again. It's like he's always got an excuse and I just...he never wanted me," Kyle said his head falling down. He looked away from her.
"Kyle," Lilly said softly.
"I was so stupid, maybe I am just a stupid kid," Kyle said jumping up.
"You are not a stupid kid, you are smart and amazing and funny," Lilly said jumping up as well. She made him look at her. "If he can't see that then it's his loss. You are a great guy Kyle," she said locking eyes with him.
"I gave him everything Lil, I just..." Kyle sighed.
"I know, it's hard, but maybe he's not the one for you. There are others out there," Lilly said softly.
Kyle leaned in and sealed their lips together in a kiss. Lilly's eyes widened in shocked before she relaxed. They fell into the familiar rhythm they knew so well.
Soon they were back on the bed and clothes were coming off. Lilly gasped as she felt his hands roaming. Her hands moved up and down his sides enticing him into something more. Kyle's hands slipped under her bra and Lilly gasped again.
This was what Lilly had wanted so bad. Then, why did it feel so wrong?
-We Are-
Logan smiled as he followed Layla up to the house. He had dropped Erika and Millie off at home. A car door shut behind the pair and they turned to see Carlos. He smiled at the two as Layla ran up to him to give him a hug.
The door of the house opened and voices were heard. The three turned to see what was going on.
"Lilly I'm sorry, I gotta go."
"Kyle wait, it's ok," Lilly said.
"No it's not you were right, I gotta go."
Logan and Carlos shared a look before walking up to the porch with Layla behind them. The saw Kyle standing in the doorway talking to Lilly.
"What's going on?" Logan asked scaring the two.
Kyle jumped and turned to face the two. He looked back to Lilly for a second and shook his head.
"Nothing," Kyle said. He quickly brushed past the others. He took off in the direction of his house.
"Lilly," Logan said looking to his daughter.
"It's nothing dad," Lilly said turning and walking inside. Carlos and Logan followed her not giving up. Logan told Layla to go get ready for bed and she didn't question him.
"Look, he came to me to talk about some personal stuff and I am not gonna betray that trust," Lilly said turning to her dad.
"Lilly," Logan started.
"No, if Kendall or James asked you not to say something to papi you wouldn't. If I thought something was wrong I'd tell you, nothing it wrong, at least that you need to know yet," Lilly said.
"All right, I trust your judgement," Logan said nodding his head. Lilly just walked up the stairs slowly. Logan waited until he heard her door shut. "Those two are gonna be the death of me," he sighed.
"What do you mean?" Carlos asked confused.
"Really Carlos, something happened between them. Kyle left in a hurry and Lilly was wearing her shirt backwards. I'm not dumb Los," Logan sighed. He could feel a headache starting.
"Oh," Carlos said slowly as he realized what his husband meant.
-We Are-
Leora gasped as Caleb collapsed next to her. Somehow hanging out at the mall had turned into watching movies at Caleb's house. His parents and siblings were all out and one thing led to another.
Leora rolled up onto her side and looked at Caleb. He was panting trying to catch his breath as well. He looked over at Leora and smiled.
"That was awesome," Caleb said leaning over and giving her a kiss. Leora smiled at that.
"Good to know, I've never done anything like that before. I was afraid I was gonna be bad at it," Leora admitted.
"You can't be bad at anything, you're Leora," Caleb replied. Leora giggled at that.
"I suppose we should get dressed before anyone gets home," Leora sighed.
"You're probably right," Caleb said as he sat up.
"Come on take me home," Leora said getting out of bed. She started to gather her clothes.
"Have I told you I love you," Caleb asked.
"A time or two," Leora giggled. She started getting dressed. Caleb followed suit. "I love you too, you dork," she added after a moment. Caleb grinned at that.
-We Are-
Kendall heard the front door open and close. He looked to James before jumping up. Kyle had left in a hurry earlier and had been jittery for over a week now. He needed to know what was wrong.
Kendall left the living room with James right behind him. They caught Kyle halfway up the stairs.
"Kyle, what is going on," James asked.
"You can talk to us you know," Kendall said.
Kyle stood there a moment. It was almost as if he was trying to think of what to say. He took a breath and sighed.
"Why didn't you tell me?" Kyle asked simply.
"Tell you what?" James asked confused.
"Not you," Kyle said glaring at Kendall. He turned fully to face his dads. "Why didn't you tell me what happened between you and Jared?"
"He told you?" Kendall asked his eyes wide.
"No, he wasn't going to. I had to hear him arguing with Roldy over it. You know dad, as my father that should've been the one thing you might have wanted to mention you know? Like 'oh by the way he's only using you because you look so similar to me.' I can't believe this never once came up," Kyle spat angrily.
"Kyle look, it's not what you think," Kendall started.
"Oh please he never wanted me. He wanted you and when he could have you he settled for me," Kyle spat. He turned and ran up the stairs.
"Go talk to him," James said pushing Kendall towards the stairs.
"He doesn't want to talk to me," Kendall said shaking his head. "He didn't listen to Jared and he won't listen to me. He's stubborn just like us."
"Alright if you say so," James said turning and walking back into the living room.
Kendall stood there a moment and sighed. Teenagers were so difficult. He knew Kyle needed some space right now. Trying to talk to him would only make it worse.
Kendall shook his head and walked back to the living room. He saw James holding his phone.
"It's been going off like crazy, it's Penelope," James said holding it out to him.
"Oh, Pen found out she was adopted. Her mother was an actress and I offered to take a look to see if I recognized her," Kendall said.
"Why would you know her?" James asked confused.
"Pen's only a few years older than Jake. I just figured if it was a young actress, we might've known her," Kendall said shrugging.
He unlocked his phone. He checked his messages. Penelope had found the picture she had been talking about. She had sent it to him.
The picture was of a woman in a hospital gown holding a baby. She had long blonde hair and light brown eyes Kendall would recognize anywhere. His heart clenched at the sight and his brain kicked into over drive.
So there you go. Will Caleb and Leora's plan work out? Or will they get hurt the longer they play this out? Kyle didn't listen to Jared or his dad, is there something he's missing? What isn't Jared saying? What will happen between Kyle and Lilly now that he and Jared are over? Who is Penelope's mother? Who's her father? I think we all know the answer to those last two now don't we? More to come next time. Hugs and kisses to those who read this as well.
Always
OUTOFMYMIND